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I feel like today we live in a culture that really glorifies love, especially in romantic movies. It seems that a message that's often communicated is that in order for a relationship to work, there needs to be strong, intense feelings of love. So if those feelings aren't there, then that person isn't the one. So then what happens when time passes and those people who once fell in love don't have those intense feelings for each other anymore? You know, there's quite a few people who get a divorce because they fell out of love or because communication was tough or because things just couldn't work out. You see, biblically speaking, it's important to note that there's only three reasons why someone could get a divorce that God would recognize. And the reason why there are so few is because God absolutely hates divorce, as we can see in Malachi, chapter 2, verse 16. So with that said, let's go ahead and cover the three reasons on when divorce is biblically allowed.
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See you there. Reason number one, when there's sexual immorality. Matthew, chapter five, verses 31 to 32. It was also said, whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce. But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. In this passage, Jesus was teaching a crowd, and this was one of his most famous teachings, and it's normally called his Sermon on the Mount, where he expounded upon God's laws that were written in the Old Testament. And I want you to notice that when it came to divorce, Jesus referenced to the laws given to Moses, which people back then abused. So essentially, a man could write a certificate of divorce for almost any issue that he had with his wife. And. And that's exactly what happened. And Jesus pushed back on that, and he said, whoa, no, you can't do that. And Jesus told everyone that if a husband and a wife were to get a divorce for any reason other than sexual immorality, they would be committing adultery. So note that this is the first reason why God would allow divorce. And Jesus explicitly says that sexual immorality is grounds for why someone could legitimately get a divorce. So question what is sexual immorality? The word for sexual immorality actually comes from the Greek word porneia, which referred not only to adultery or having sex with someone else's spouse. It also referred to any kind of shameful sexual actions or behaviors that would destroy a relationship. So today I think that could look like a spouse engaging in any sexual activity with someone other than their husband or wife. And because the Greek word for sexual immorality is porneia, where we get the word porn, I'd also make the argument that people engaged in sins like pornography, masturbation, or sexting and refuse to fight and get help in order to repent would also be guilty of the kind of sexual immorality that Jesus mentions in this passage. So if any of these sexual sins are present in a marriage, then I'd say that Christians have biblical grounds for divorce. However, I do need to add that I know of many Christian couples who stayed married despite their partner falling, and they were able to forgive them. Now, I'm not saying that every married couple should stay together if their partner cheats on them. What I am saying is that while divorce is permissible, forgiveness is always preferable. God in the Old Testament referred to Israel many times as an adulterous spouse, and God all throughout the book of Jeremiah pleaded for Israel to turn back to him. So in the same way that God offers mercy and grace, I think that all Christians should at least attempt to reflect God's heart. So that's the first reason. Next, let's cover reason number two when there's abandonment 1 Corinthians, chapter 7, verse 15 but if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. In this passage, Paul wrote to the church in Corinth, which was a city of new believers, and they struggled in particular with division, and they had tons of relationship issues. And some of those Christians at the time were married to unbelieving spouses who were not Christians, and others were in marriages with believers who left the faith. So Paul in First Corinthians chapter 7 gives potential situations where spouses leave their partners and Paul encourages them many times and to fight for their marriage and to not get a divorce. But in this verse, verse 15, Paul described a situation in which a believer is abandoned by their spouse, and those believers are told to let it be so and to not be enslaved or under bondage to their departing spouse anymore. So here's where we get the second reason when divorce is allowed. And simply put, it's abandonment and it's a permissible reason for divorce alongside sexual immorality. So for example, if there's a married couple where one of them is a Christian and the other is not a Christian, and the unbelieving partner decides to leave and never come back, then the Christian who was left behind may get a divorce if despite their best efforts, they weren't able to reconcile with their spouse. Now, I do need to define what an unbelieving partner is, and I think an unbeliever in this context is can fall into one of three categories. Where category one is a person who was never a Christian to begin with. Category number two is a person who professed to be a Christian but left the faith. And category number three is where a professing Christian refuses to listen to Jesus commands and the church and acts like an unbeliever and leaves their spouse anyway. And regarding category number three, people may say, wait a second, isn't that just a believer leaving a believer then? And to that I'd say, I get that. But there are cases in which a believer should be treated as someone outside the church, which I would argue could be someone who is recognized as an unbeliever. Because if you look at Matthew, chapter 18, verses 15 to 17, Jesus says that if a believer sins against a believer, then they should confront them. And if that didn't work, then bring more people with them to confront the believer who sinned against them. And if that doesn't work, then to bring their problem to the church. And if this believer who sinned does not listen to the church, then they ought to be treated as someone outside the church. So to get to the point, I think that someone who claims to be a Christian but also refuses to reconcile with their believing spouse and refuses to listen to to the church, then they should be treated as an unbeliever. Which I would argue means that First Corinthians chapter 7, verse 15 would apply to them, meaning that if they were to leave their spouse, then the believing partner can treat them as an unbeliever if those previously mentioned efforts were made. So with that said, let's go ahead and cover our last reason for divorce. So reason number three, when there's cases of abuse, and for this point, let's reread First Corinthians chapter 7, verse 15. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace in this passage. I want you to notice the phrase in such cases, which could also be translated in cases like this, meaning that Paul's teaching here could apply to other kinds of situations that have the same characteristics of physical abandonment or separation. And I would argue that abuse, especially when it's extreme, ongoing and unrepentant, fits this description because it destroys the peace of the marriage and now enslaves the spouse. And in this passage it does say that in such cases a believer should not be enslaved. So I do need to mention that marital abuse being a legitimate reason for divorce is not mentioned explicitly in the Bible. But I would say that Christians have always believed that abuse goes against God's desire for marriage. And when it comes to Paul addressing reasons for divorce, I think he understands that relationships are all different. Different with their own unique struggles and weaknesses, and that different couples should work towards a specific solution that is suited for them. So instead of Paul giving a strict three step program on how to counsel every struggling couple in this passage, it seems he really highlights two principles that all believers should keep in mind. Principle number one, don't rush to divorce your partner in confusing situations. And principle number two, when an unbeliever violates the peace of the marriage and abandons their believing partner, the believer is not to be enslaved to them. So all that to say abuse is wrong and it should not be minimized or explained away. And I'd argue that abuse is included in the such cases in this passage and it should be a reason to seek safety and divorce. Divorce if necessary. And one of the reasons why I say that is because abuse takes what was supposed to be a blessed union and family home and turns it into a prison. And anyone who engages in extreme, continual and unrepentant abuse should be treated as an unbeliever who has abandoned their spouse and family. So if you or someone you know is in this situation, I want you to know that God never calls his children to remain trapped in this way. And he desires healing and freedom for every victim of abuse and for the abuser to be held accountable for their destructive actions. Okay, so to close, the only reasons why a Christian is permitted to get a divorce according to the Bible, are when there's sexual immorality, abandonment, and when there's cases of abuse. To close, I do want to say that marriage is tough. And I should mention that this video was meant to be informative, so we weren't trying to write this to persuade you to get or not get a divorce. Rather Our hope is for you to really understand what the Bible has to say about this topic so that it can help you come to your own conclusion should you need to use this information. And if any of you are considering divorce or feeling the after effects of one, or if you're trying to restore your marriage, I hope you rest in the peace that God offers you. And if you're wrestling with this, or if the time comes and you feel unloved, I hope you remember today that Jesus loves you. Hey guys, thank you so much for watching our video and if it blessed you, please consider liking subscribing and clicking the notification bell. Also, I wanted to give a huge shout out to the team listed below. Their hard work makes our ministry possible, so please support them and click their links in the description below. And if you didn't know, I started my own personal podcast called Practical Christianity. So if you'd like to support me, please check it out and subscribe. The link is also in the description below. Also, I want to say thank you all to our newest members. Honestly, every bit of support helps so much when it comes to making videos, and if you'd like to support us in the work that we're doing, please consider becoming a member. For the price of a cup of coffee each month, you can help support us in our mission to spread God's Word through our videos. So again, thank you so much for all your support and we'll see you guys next time. God bless.