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Randall
How does one get over insecurity to become more vulnerable?
Robert Greene
The best way to not be insecure is to succeed.
Randall
What's an anti seducer?
Robert Greene
They talk too much. They know everything. They're people who have a talent for repelling others. They're difficult.
Randall
The best advice I've ever received is.
Robert Greene
Do what you love and the money will come.
Randall
You're listening to part two of my incredible interview with Robert Greene, a six time New York Times best selling author. His books include the 48 Laws of Power, the Artist, Seduction and Mastery. Incredible interview. If you haven't yet listened to part one, be sure to check that one out first. Now, without further ado, here's part two of my awesome interview with Robert. Your second book, the Artist Seduction. You're 42 years old. Another massive hit. Why did you write a book about seduction and where did the idea come from?
Robert Greene
Well, it came from several places. First of all, the Laws of Power have stories of seduction in there. Because the ideas I mentioned earlier, if you get people to like to do what you want, but they think it's for their, they want to do it. You seduce them and it's the highest form of power. There's no resentment at all. They actually enjoy doing what serves your interests right because you've made it pleasurable. So seduction is a high, high form of power. Okay. It's not just sexual seduction. Seduction is social, it's political, it's marketing, it's psychology. So I wanted to write a book about the psychology of seduction. Focusing. Yeah, there's a lot of stories in there about sexual seduction, but there's stories about political seductions and JFK and Malcolm X and there's social seductions and there's marketing. I even have stories about marketing.
Randall
So what are the differences between those three types of seduction? Political, social and marketing?
Robert Greene
There's nothing. They're all the same. It's the same thing. You're lowering people's resistance. People are naturally resistant to you. They don't want to vote for you. Why am I going to vote for John F. Kennedy? He's a Catholic. He's too young, he's too liberal. He's from Massachusetts. You know. Why am I going to buy your product? It's new. I've never heard of it before. I don't know anybody else who's using it. People are resistant to you. Why am I ever going to go out on a date with this guy? I don't know who the hell he is. He could be a serial killer for all I know. People are Naturally resistant to you. Seduction is a process of lowering those walls one by one until they fall under your spell and they do what you want. Right. It's the same process. That's what fascinated me in this, was to get the common psychology involved. The other aspect was in my 20s, when I was younger and had all that hot blood in me, I was playing a lot of that game of seduction. It fascinated me on a personal level. You mentioned that hotel I worked in Paris. I was 22 years old, a receptionist. It was the hotel where all of the models stayed when they came to Paris.
Randall
Yeah, Fun, right?
Robert Greene
It was like shooting fish in a barrel.
Randall
I gotta stop you there. Hotel receptionist frowned on sleeping with guests of the hotel. Was that like a thing? We're trying to get around that. And if so, how'd you do that?
Robert Greene
It's France, so you can just say laws in France.
Randall
I'm out. 10 o'clock. My shift is over. Hey, I'm going to go upstairs with one of the guests. No problem.
Robert Greene
If you're in France and you're not doing that, something is wrong with you. Right? That's how the French people look at it. Okay. So, you know, it wasn't just the models that I was like after, but I met a man there who was a Brazilian man who was very tall, very handsome. He was most unbelievable seducer I've ever seen in my entire life. He was so smooth, women were just melting in front of him. And I wanted to go, why? What is his secret? And I kind of followed him around and I sort of saw some of his secrets that ended up kind of inserting themselves into the art of seduction. So there was a personal interest and also a kind of love, the literature of seduction, the great novels that have to do with seduction. So there were many angles that fascinated me in this subject.
Randall
Explain the difference between a warm seducer and a cold seducer.
Robert Greene
Well, you want to be a warm seducer. The cold seducer typically, or could be a woman, but often it would be the male who is just predatory and it's just basically after sex. Right. And so, you know, he's. He is. Well, it could be a woman who's just after money or back in the day when that was the case, it's not so much the case anymore. A courtesan who's basically just a gold digger. Of course there still are gold diggers. I don't mean that, but, you know, so there are men who are just after sex and they're pretty good at it. Right. But there's Nothing. There's no real emotion in it. They don't feel. They feign interest in the woman and the moment they get her, they move on to the next one. Right. But the hot seducer is what you want to be, is what I was, I considered myself more like, which is you genuinely are excited by the person. You're not just faking it, you're not just faking that. You're interested in it. And you're not just after sex. You actually are interested in the person. You actually maybe want to fall in love with them. Right. And because you have that genuine desire for them, it has a memetic effect on the other person. They get kind of caught up in the infection of it. They get infected by your own emotion and they fall under your spell as well. So that's the difference between a cold and a hot seducer. You want to be more of the hot variety.
Randall
What's an anti seducer?
Robert Greene
I encounter them in life and they're difficult. There are people who have a talent for repelling others. Right. Okay, so they talk too much, they know everything. Okay, Right. A lot of women have this experience. The man will get their explainers. They know everything and they just talk, talk, talk about themselves and they know, you know, answer to everything. Very anti seductive because it shows that you're only interested in yourself. Right. People who preach and moralize is very anti seductive. A seducer wants to be open, wants to be non judgmental, wants to be tolerant of the other person. That shows that you're kind of secure, you're not insecure. You can reduce all of anti seductive traits to great deals of insecurity that come out. Right. You're always, you're on a date and you're always thinking about yourself. Am I saying the right thing? Does she or he like me? You know, am I, you know, how are they viewing me? As opposed to being interested in them and their world. What are they thinking of? You know, what is, what are their likes and preferences? Not about you, it's about them. That's what makes seduction successful and very therapeutic as well. So ant seducers are too self involved. They're too worried about themselves. They talk too much, they, they're vulgar, they moralize, they preach. I could go on and on.
Randall
You've talked about seduction is also a matter of vulnerability. I think vulnerability is one of the most underrepresented qualities of being a leader. How do people become more vulnerable and peel away all that exterior armor so they have better relationships?
Robert Greene
Well, you have to let go, you know, that's part of the process. You have to be willing to accept pain and being hurt and being rejected. So the word vulnerable comes from the Latin vulnus, which means wound. A wound. So to be vulnerable is to be open to being wounded, right? And a lot of people, particularly in the world today, they're deathly afraid of any kind of wound, of any kind of hurt. So they protect themselves. If I don't go out in the world, if I don't date people, if I protect myself, then I'm never going to feel hurt, I'm never going to feel rejected. And you want the opposite thing. To be rejected is okay. It's a good thing in life. It teaches you something. It teaches you about your limits. It teaches you about what maybe you did wrong. It also gives you a little bit of a thicker skin. You can endure it. I tell people, if you've been rejected, you've been hurt, on to the next person, just go on, find somebody else. Don't internalize it. So feeling vulnerable is letting go of your ego, letting go of that tightness, letting go of that ability to protect yourself at all costs from any kind of hurt. You want to fail in life, you want adversity. Failing in life is the best education that can ever happen to you, Right? And failing in life is a deep wound, but it teaches you very valuable lessons. So if you go through life where I don't want to ever have feel hurt, I don't ever want to feel criticized or to fail, you're never going to learn, you're never going to succeed, you're never going to be powerful.
Randall
One of the reasons why we're not vulnerable at times is because we're very insecure. We're insecure about the way we look, we dress, we feel our relationships, our personality, anything in our sphere of life. At some point in life, we all are. So how does one get over insecurity to become more vulnerable? Because insecurity is a bad thing or is it a good thing?
Robert Greene
Well, it's neither good nor bad. It just is. I mean, the best way to not be insecure is to succeed is to have to do something to accomplish something that gives you a degree of real confidence, because there's fake confidence. There are people who think that they're wonderful, but they're not really wonderful. And that's masking a lot of insecurity. And we can kind of read that off them. But if you actually achieve something, if you actually reach a goal, you set yourself a goal. I'm going to start A business when I'm 25, you start that business and it fails. Okay. But I had the cojones to start that business in the first place. I can feel pretty good about that. Right? That gives you confidence. But if you never try it, if you never try to start that business, you may feel protected, but you're insecure. And that insecurity will haunt you the rest of your life. Right? So the best way to not feel secure is to accomplish something, is to get off your butt and do something. To act in this world, to try and achieve a goal. And if you do, then, you know, you'll feel less insecure. You have something to rest upon. You have laurels to rest upon. You have a sense of. Damn it. In a world where people talk and talk and talk and pretend to be something. I actually tried. I didn't talk. I did it. Well, that will help you overcome some of your insecurities.
Randall
I think one of the place. And this is an unusual thing to say, but I think this is very true for so many people. People are afraid to tell their partners, even their wives, some of their sexual fantasies. So it could be mirror on the ceiling, could be swings.
Robert Greene
I didn't know we were going this way.
Randall
Could be, could be, could be all different things. Yeah, right. But people are afraid to express their sexual desires, even the people they love the most, because they're insecure of how people are going to perceive them.
Robert Greene
Yeah.
Randall
How should they get over that?
Robert Greene
Whoa.
Randall
Do you talk about the swing? Hey, I, you know, I really want a pole coming down next to the bed.
Robert Greene
Well, no, I think you have to be kind of subtle about it. Right. I don't think it's just come out of nowhere. But there has to be already a base of comfort between the two of you where they're not going to be judgmental. They're not going to. You know. The worst thing is you're going to say, yeah, you know, sometimes I like to be dressed up as an infant and be spanked. And that comes out of nowhere. God, I didn't even know who this person was. Get the hell out of my life. Right?
Randall
Yeah.
Robert Greene
So there has to be.
Randall
Painting's a big thing, apparently. They got paddles, they got outfits, they got whips. Who the fuck wants to get whipped?
Robert Greene
I remember once I was on a movie set, the first film I was on, and we're shooting in somebody's house. They're not living there, and they have the doors that we're not supposed to open. And of course we go and we Open a closet door. And they had like, you know, adult infant outfits with all the paraphernalia with it. We were like, oh my God. You know, it was pretty shocking. Anyway, so it is out there, but, you know, if you reveal something like that, the other person is going to go, God, I didn't know Randall at all. I didn't know he had these kind of tastes. Get me out of here. I'm getting a divorce. Right. So it's got to be a level of trust already established between you two. And the context has to be kind of not so heavy. Like, you know, it has to be kind of fun and playful and maybe you introduce it subtly in the context of, you know, you're actually doing something quote unquote intimate. I'm getting a little embarrassed here. You're getting doing something kind of intimate and you, you know, introduce a little element of this. So it's not like a total shock. I'm just saying, you know, you have to be subtle about these things and you have to kind of prepare them so it doesn't seem like, hey, I don't know who this person is who I've been involved with for 20 years.
Randall
When I got divorced, I was single for seven and a half years. I go to line. I had three guys who I was friends with and they were all 60 plus older in age, they were all very wealthy. And it was so depressing to talk to them because what they told me, and they were all divorced too. And they said, yeah, I mean, you lose sexual desire for your partner at some age in life and it doesn't really matter as much. So you're just going to have to accept that going forward. And I know a lot of friends, I'm sure you do too, who barely have sex with their husbands or their wives. I have a friend I've known for a long time. She hasn't had sex with her husband in 15 years, yet she's still in the relationship. You talk a lot about companionship and compatibility. What's your advice to those people on how to reignite that spark and get back into it and just want to get in there again?
Robert Greene
Well, you know, everybody's different. If it's something that you're missing that's painful for you, then I understand. But, you know, it has to be a mutual thing. It can't just come from one side. So relationships, you know, people don't understand that. It's this continual back and forth. There's an energy that happens between you two and sometimes the current is cut off. On one side, but it's generally both. People are kind of responsible for it. So it can't be just you bulldozing the other person saying, come on, let's go have sex now kind of thing, or judging them or doing that. You have to kind of go at it subtly. You have to kind of get them as interested as you are in it. It has to be a mutual back and forth thing and not something where you're just foisting it on them. Because that's the whole thing about when we're talking about seduction, is when it only comes from one side. When it's only like, God damn it, I've got to have sex with this woman. Right. And you're manipulating her. It lacks that juice, it lacks that energy that happens with like an electrical current that goes back and forth. So in your scenario, you want to have that current opening up between the two of you. However you do that, you don't want to be like imposing on the other person and make it seem like you're judging them kind of thing. Does that make sense?
Randall
Yeah. Can you fix something if you're not attracted to somebody physically and still have a great relationship with a spouse or a significant other?
Robert Greene
Yes, of course you can. I mean, you know, you have a deep affection, you have a love, just like you have a love for your children. And that's not crossing a boundary. You know, you can. They're all forms of love and they don't have to involve sex at all. You know, we have to widen our interpretations of things. If you're with somebody for a very long time, you have incredible memories. You know, you have things that you've shared together. You have all that kind of years of affection. Yeah, you have. You've had your disagreements, but you've seen a lot. You've grown together, you know, you've experienced the world together. I think it's a great thing to go through that. And it doesn't have to be, you know, when you're in your 20s and you have that kind of intense physical relationship, they tend to burn out pretty quickly. Right. And so you're going to mellow out as you get older anyway. And it's okay. It's okay. Because it can be kind of more of a deeper bond in some ways. And yes, you still have sex and still intimate and you're still physical, but it's not the same thing. Why does everything have to be the same? You're not young anymore, you're not in your 20s. Just get over it.
Randall
So you're accepting the fact that people have less sex and they should have less sex when they're 40, 50, 60 years old.
Robert Greene
I'm saying it's nothing wrong with that is what I'm saying. If you think there's something wrong with that, that's fine. I'm not judging you. I'm not a judgmental person. It's okay. But it's also okay to feel like things are mellowing. I'm older. I don't have the desire that I used to have. I'm not freaking out about it. I'm not going out and getting massive injections of testosterone to change that. You know, I'm not swallowing Viagra every few hours. It's okay.
Randall
That was going to be my nice question.
Robert Greene
It's okay. You know, that's what happens. Look, I'm in my 60s. I had a stroke. Right? Your body doesn't change. Your mind changes, and your body changes as you get older. And you have to kind of accept things. It's painful, but you have to accept some of them.
Randall
Dating today is way different than when we were growing up. I mean, it's just.
Robert Greene
I'm a lot older than you.
Randall
It's just different. I'm 56. So you've got, I think, 10 years on you. 10 years. I mean, not that much. My dating life when I was younger was similar to yours. There were no online apps. I mean, you can go on these bars and by the way, I had to pound down a few brewskis to even have the courage to go talk to somebody today. You can go on an app. There's apps.
Robert Greene
I know they're swiping.
Randall
There's fucking apps where you just. You're on. You know, you put in your menu and you're there and it's just. It's just one and done. What is your advice in this kind of world where social media makes it so easy to hook up with something on dating?
Robert Greene
Well, I know I'm going to sound like your grandfather to those people out there, but what the hell, I probably am the age of your grandfather. You know, you're doing yourself a disservice if you're doing that. And it's not just because I'm this old guy who never had to deal with that. It's because I've been studying human nature and people for many, many years. I'm not good at a lot of things. I can't shoot a basketball like I used to. I'm not good at a lot of things. But I understand people very well, and human nature. I wrote a very thick book on that. And your ability to understand people, not virtually, but in the flesh. Eye contact, being able to be in front of them, to talk to them, not through a screen, but actually there. To actually have to be funny, to actually have to communicate, to actually have to say something interesting, to actually have express interest in their world. You need to be in front of them. You need to be there and see them. And in doing that, you run the risk of doing the wrong thing. Because on that computer, on your phone, you can kind of make yourself seem like, you know, the hottest thing on the planet. You can create a whole fantasy that's not real. But when you're there together, there's nothing. Everything's real. And you're going to say something stupid or you're going to not look so great, or your hair is going to be all messed up. Whatever, it's okay. You've got to learn human skills. You've got to go out there and you have to deal with people. Because if you don't, it will ripple outside of your dating world into your work world, into your social world. You won't know how to deal with colleagues. You won't know how to say something. You won't know how to be charming to people. Right? You'll be all shy and nervous. Whoa, swiping, swiping, swiping. It'll take anything but to go to a bar or to come up to a stranger and try to talk to them and try and get them interested. Man, that takes guts. And you're being timid, you're being weak, you're being a coward. Put yourself out in the world, face rejection, and try and develop some real people skills, because social skills are a muscle. And if you don't ever exercise that muscle, you're just going to be really flabby and you'll never get anywhere. You want to exercise that muscle through real experiences, not through virtual experiences.
Randall
You wrote a book called mastery. When you're 53 years old, you know.
Robert Greene
More about me than I know about myself. That's pretty great.
Randall
Okay, why did you write the book, and what does Mastery actually mean?
Robert Greene
I wrote the book because I was a little bit worried. People were taking, like, the 48 laws of power is all that matters in life. If I'm good, if I have the people skills, if I can be like a con artist, if I can kind of bluff my way through life, power. There's something missing from that scenario. And that something is you actually have to be good at what you do, you can't bluff your way through life, right? You could be the CEO of a company. You can master all the 48 laws of power. But if you're incompetent, if you don't know, if you don't have the necessary skills to see it through, then it's all going to blow up in your face. So mastery is an extremely important component in the game of power, in your success and your feeling of fulfillment in life. And basically what mastery is, is essentially using the human brain, this immense organ, this gift that you have been given, the most powerful instrument that we know in the universe, the billions of neurons that are there, the connections. It's immensely powerful. Mastery is using that brain that you were gifted with to the maximum effect that it has to reach a level of not just creativity, but to have an intuitive feel for exactly what's going to come next. So if you're a soccer player, you know exactly like Pele did or Messi, exactly where the players are going to be. You can anticipate them with a great pass or like a great basketball player, you're a chess master. The chessboard is in your head. You have seen 15 moves in advances, whereas the other person's only seen a couple of moves in advance. You're a piano. You're a pianist, and the piano is so deeply inside of you that you don't have to even look at your fingers. It just comes, flows out of you. That is mastery. It's an intuitive feel for the instrument that you are using. And to tell you the truth, it is the most joyous experience a human being can have. You know, maybe even more joyous than the sex we were talking about, but I'm not going to go that far.
Randall
Brandi Lava, who is a porn star, and she's kind of an icon in the industry, I think she hit it right. I think she said sex is the most pleasurable activity in the world. And if you add, you know, we haven't taken any scientific polls, but I think. Yeah, I think a lot of people say that, but mastery beats sex.
Robert Greene
I think it does. Because, you know, sex is like, I'm not. I'm not, you know, don't get me wrong here. But, you know, sex is like a continual hunger. You never really feel satisfied. You want more and more and more of it. And then there are moments of pain, you know, and you feel like afterwards, like sometimes, I know, as a man, sometimes you feel kind of almost sad or depressed afterwards. Mastery is like this high that just continues on and on and on. You don't have to think anymore. All these great ideas come to you. Now, granted, this is something that not many people experience because they talk about 10,000 hours. This is 20,000 hours. This is 25,000 hours of work. And it's very high level, but it's like a continual mental orgasm because things just come to you. The greatest ideas. You see perfectly exactly what has to come next. It's a wonderful feeling.
Randall
You study some of the most iconic figures in history. Darwin, Einstein, Henry Ford, Da Vinci. So how does a guy like Freddie roach, who was a boxing coach, Manny Pacquiao and some other people who retired at age 26 and who bit a guy's eye out in the ring make that list?
Robert Greene
Well, Freddie is a great guy and he's probably the most successful boxing coach. He also does mixed martial arts as well in history. His record speaks for itself. But what interested me in the story of Freddie roach was, and I met him and I got to know him very well, is he was not a great boxer. He was not a master boxer. He was a journeyman. Right. You know, he took a lot of punches. His record was good, but wasn't great. He was not bad, but he was maybe a mediocre boxer and his career is over at an early age. He took too many punches. I don't know exactly how old. Early 30s. And as a lot of people in that situation, like you mentioned, Olympic athletes, was very depressed and he's wandering around Las Vegas trying to make a living, and he's doing telemarketing, you know, and he's like reaching the bottom there. You know, he's.
Randall
He's.
Robert Greene
I don't know if he's suicidal, but he's close to it. And then he wanders into a gym and he starts sort of seeing some boxers training there, and he starts helping one of them. And I mentioned that moment where yost alfer said, robert, do you have any ideas for book? And suddenly, whoa. Yeah, helping this person. Suddenly he had that light bulb go out in his head going, this is what I was meant to do. I'm not a very good boxer, but I am a great teacher. I know boxing, I know the strategy. It's all in my head. I couldn't perform the right thing, but I know about it in my head. And he was able to translate that skill. So I love that story for the ability, the lesson that it has, that you might be that lawyer who's 29 years old who's like Freddie roach, who's boxed out, who's taking concussions, who's taking too many punches to the head? And you can segue into something else and become a master. As long as you understand that Freddie didn't go saying, I'm going to become a politician, I'm going to become a writer, I'm going to become a rock star. No, he's going to take his boxing skills and become a great teacher. And over the course of 10, 15, 20 years of teaching, he knew every little aspect of that, of what we call the beautiful sport, the strategy of boxing. He had it in his head it wasn't the man punching, but he was the man telegraphing, telling people how to punch. I think it's an amazing story, an amazing lesson.
Randall
One of the phases of mastery is apprenticeship. And you just talked about 10,000 hours, but you said it's 20,000 hours. And I think when people hear that number, Robert, they say, holy shit, there's no way I can do that. To master something, that's a lot of hours.
Robert Greene
You know, when I was pulling nails out of those boards on the island of Crete to get my pay my way off the island, and I was pretty miserable, if I ever looked at the 500 boards that I had to pull out the nails, I would have killed myself. I just did each board at a time, each rusty nail, and took them out one board at a time. You don't sit there and go, wow, I've got 20, I've got 19,800 hours ahead of me. You just do what you have to do. So here's the beauty of it, Randall. If you're starting out, you're 21 years old, and your apprenticeship starts, which usually about seven to 10 years long, whatever field you're in, and you have chosen something that you want, that interests you, that excites you in some way. It doesn't have to be exactly what you're going to end up doing, but it excites you. Those hours just float by. Yes, it's painful. Yes, you have to learn things. You have to practice, you have to take your punches, you have to take some pain. People have to criticize you. But in general, you're having a great time. You're learning, you're young, you look good, you have energy. People like you. When you're in your 20s, life is beautiful. I don't care how depressed, how poor you are, you're 20 and you have all this energy. It should be wonderful. So you're not sitting there thinking about each hour. You're enjoying it, you know? So if you're Kobe Bryant, God rest him soul. If you're 20 years old and you're just starting in the NBA, you're not thinking of all the jump shots, the next 10,000 jump shots you have to take. You're in the moment. You're getting better each day. You're progressing, you're competing, you're getting better and you're enjoying it. And you love it because he had a great love of basketball. So you don't sit there and count the hours. You'd kill yourself if you did. You're in the moment. But if you don't find the career that was meant for you, if you have a bad match, if you were meant to be a basketball player and you're a lawyer, that's a terrible metaphor, but something like that, you're going to be miserable. You're going to be counting those hours. You're going to be going, damn it, I have to do law for eight more years and I have to put 10,000 hours. I'm never going to make it. You're going to tune out. You're going to be a failure. You're going to start taking drugs or something.
Randall
I hope you're enjoying this video so far. But before we jump back in, I want to know if you've ever thought about what you need to do to reach the next level of success in your life. Over the last 25 years, I've been an advisor to more than 50 companies. I've invested nearly 100, including Google, lift and Seagate. And I also co founded a company that today is worth More than 50, $15 billion. I've been incredibly blessed in my journey and at this stage in my life. I want to give back. I want to share the lessons I've learned so you can reach incredible success way faster than I did in my own journey. I've learned that having the right mentor is a massive advantage to achieving our goals. I'm hugely passionate about mentoring others, and I'm looking for a few hungry entrepreneurs who are excited to take action on their journey to incredible future success. So if that's you, I've got an opportunity. In the description of this video, there's a link where you can apply to work with me. All you need to do is answer a few simple questions, and if you're a good fit, my team will reach out so we can build a game plan together. All right, now let's get back to the video. You said everyone in life has a purpose, life's purpose, a unique purpose. Is that really true? You talk about life's task. There's so many people I know who are lost and they don't have a purpose. So for those people, how do they find it?
Robert Greene
Well, it's the million dollar question. If I could summarize that in two minutes, I'd be a billionaire. So it takes a little longer. But the gist of it is, I'll put it this way. When you were born, you have a DNA, a combination of genetic factors that have never existed in the history of the universe and will never exist in the future. The number of permutations of combinations in that code are just mathematically impossible to calculate. So you are a unique individual at birth, right? Your brain is wired in a very particular way. Your parents are also wired in their own particular weird way. They're going to be raising you in their own unique, weird, unique style of raising and parenting. And then your early years and your encounters are going to be unlike anybody else. But you are a unique individual. You're like a flower that has never existed before, right? There is something about you that will never be replicated in the history of the universe. That uniqueness points to something that is your life's task. What your brain is, how you're wired differently. What that sensitivity is in you is an indication of what you were meant to do. And if you look at anybody who succeeds in this world, anybody who's powerful, anybody that you admire, you can say one they're one of a kind. They're unique, right? I'm not a great admirer of Elon Musk, particularly nowadays, but he's very successful. There's nobody else like him. There was nobody else like Steve Jobs. There's nobody else like 50 Cent. 50 came from the worst part of America, Southside, Queens. All the cards stacked against him and all the friends that he knew are either dead or in prison. Yet he succeeded. He's unique. He's one of a kind because he understood what made him different. Understanding what makes you different is your life's task if you understand it. If you cultivate that seed and make something unique, you will have found your life's task.
Randall
When we're younger, our brains function differently. We're more emotionally engaged in things that we're interested in. It gets harder and harder when you're 25, 35 or 45. So can you learn as effectively to master something as you get older? You haven't found Life's purpose of 45 or 55. Can you still do it?
Robert Greene
Look, my advice to people is don't get into that Situation, avoid it at all cost.
Randall
Yeah, but there's a lot of people listening to this where 30 mid career.
Robert Greene
Professionals, 30 is very possible. 55, you're pushing it. Okay, I'm sorry to say I don't want to be giving faults. I mean there are examples of people who at that age have taken their career and what they've learned because really what it's about is. So for instance, in Mastery, I talk about the story of Paul Graham, the man who founded Y Combinator, the most successful tech startup school that ever existed for entrepreneurs, right? He sold it and Sam Altman became the owner of it. We all know what's happened to Sam Altman, somebody I met when I was interviewing Paul Graham. Anyway, Paul Graham started out studying computer coding and AI, even back in the late 70s. He was a hacker his whole life as a kid, and he studied programming in college and he got a PhD in it and he burned out on it and he wasn't interested in it anymore. He got sick of it and he was interested in art and design and he went to Italy and he studied painting in Italy. And then he comes back to New York and he's painting in his loft in Soho or whatever, not making any money, and he hears an ad on the radio for Netscape and how the future and the Internet will be selling things on the Internet which nobody'd ever heard of. So the light bulb goes in his head, goes, I can take my coding skills, my programming, and I can take my skills in art and design and I can combine them to design a very aesthetically pleasing and very grabbing and very effective Internet shop, which he ended up selling to Yahoo, the first Internet shop ever created, made his first fortune, and then the rest is history. The lesson I'm trying to tell you here is he reached this point in his early 30s. He took his skills that he had learned and he put them together in a unique way and he developed something monstrously successful. Even if you're in your mid-50s, you've probably had several different careers, several different things. If you can loosen yourself up and not be so rigid in your, in your thinking, you could probably take the different skills you've acquired and combine them in something unique. If you're open and creative. The problem is when you're young, you're open and creative and willing to do things. You're flexible, you know, you have an open spirit. And when you're older, you think you know everything and you're so rigid, you're so on a one track. So that's the problem that you face.
Randall
How much of our mastery is determined by our passion? And just how far can passion take us to be successful?
Robert Greene
I don't like the word passion because it sounds like a perfume ad or something. It's not. I don't like that word. I like the word desire. Okay, so because passion is like something kind of uncontrolled, it's too strong. You want to have the desire for something. So when I first, when I was in college, I studied French for two, three years because I love foreign languages. And then I went to Paris, where I worked in a hotel, and, damn it, I couldn't speak three words. I couldn't order breakfast. I couldn't tell what I wanted a room for this kind of thing. I couldn't do anything. I hadn't learned a thing. And then when I was at the hotel, I think before I was at the hotel, I met this French girl that I was really excited about. I wanted to seduce her, right? She was fantastic. In two months, I learned more French than three years of college because I wanted to. I had the desire. So if you desire something, you learn at a faster rate because you're motivated, your mind is open. When you don't want to learn something, you're 26 and you have to study algebra, you're never going to learn because you don't want to. You're tuning it out. You're not focused. But if you're focused on something and you desire it, your mind just is absorbing it at a much faster rate. So desire is the key to learning in anything.
Randall
I do a lot of coaching. I do coaching with interns, and I have a professional coaching business now where I'm coaching people who want to grow their businesses, be a better professional. One of the things that people are motivated most about in their jobs is money. And money ranks usually at the top of the list when you ask people what they're most interested in. You said in your book that people should take half salary to learn more. But at some point in people's lives, that's not practical. So at what point do you say we should do it? At what point do you say it's not practical, we shouldn't do it?
Robert Greene
Well, look at it this way. One of the richest men in the world at his death was Steve Jobs. You know, I know there were other people wealthier, but he was worth several billion. And if he was still alive, he'd be worth incredible amount of money. He was never interested in money. It never crossed his mind. It was never something that motivated him. What motivated me. If you read the biography by Walter Isaacson, you'll understand this. What motivated him was creating the perfect design. He was a perfectionist. He was obsessed with creating the perfect design. And because he created the perfect design, he became fabulously wealthy. If money is your primary interest, you're not going to be creating something unique and different. You're going to be following what other people are doing. The path to money is what that person did. I'm just going to imitate them because business is full of imitators. Believe me, I know. I served on the board of directors of a publicly traded company. Business people are very frightened. They're always following what the other guy or other woman did. Right? Okay. That's what's going to happen. If money is your motivation, you're not going to stick your gut neck out there and start a business that's a risk that could lose a lot of money, but could be fabulously successful if it takes off. The other thing is if you join a company that's small, that's just starting out, but is paying you a pittance, 20, 30,000 a year or whatever that would be, you're going to be learning so much because you can be hands on, you're going to have responsibility. Whereas if you take that six figure figure at Goldman Sachs, you're not going to be learning anything because you're surrounded by all these other whippersnappers from Yale who are just as motivated as you are. And you're all sitting around, you know, you're not, you're not hands on, you don't have any responsibility. So if you're young, be willing to be poor, be willing to be hungry, you know, you can eat, you know, ramen and things like that. I know I lived on that for several years. You can't, when you're 30s and 40s, you get, that's depressing. But you can eat, you can live more cheaply and you're going to learn and you're going to be excited and you're going to take risks. If money is your only value, you're never going to take risks. And risks is where the money, true money really lies.
Randall
When I was an intern in Washington, I worked at the National Crime Prevention Council, the Watergate, Safeway man, you've had.
Robert Greene
A lot of different. You've had more jobs than me.
Randall
Well, this is an internship, had a lot of jobs. We would buy a box of Kraft Macaroni and cheese for 99 cents. We got four meals out of that bad boy. It Was great, you know, really makes you. Makes you stronger. One of the things, and it's. It's you pointing to, I've had a lot of jobs. A lot of people I know have had lots of jobs. You were at this job for seven years and then you said, oh, my God, I just wasted all that time. It's not what I want to do now. I want to go into something else. Not true.
Robert Greene
What do you mean not true?
Randall
You said that nothing's a waste of time. Your career will follow you, and you never know what you learn, how valuable it is in your future.
Robert Greene
It's all in your head. It's all in who you are. So I've given advice to people who were depressed. They had like the equivalent of a fast food job flipping burgers. It wasn't exactly that, but something like that, and they were really depressed. I said, look, look at your job differently, okay? First of all, you're learning what you hate. You don't want to be doing this forever. So there's a motivating factor, okay? So you're learning that every day on the job, you're telling yourself, I've got to improve myself. The second thing is you're dealing with people all of the time. People you don't necessarily like, customers, etc. You're learning about human nature. You're learning about people, okay? Everything is a learning experience, even the worst thing going on. The horrible smells, the food frying, etc. You're learning. You're learning. You're learning if that's your mindset, right? So then when it comes time to move on to something else, you feel like you've wasted your time. That's what I talk about. Alive time and dead time. Dead time is just, oh, I can't wait for these three hours to pass. I just got to get there. Or I'm learning in these three hours, I'm learning what's going on. I'm learning about. I'm observing. I'm observing myself, I'm observing people, I'm observing the craft, the trade that I'm doing, etc. That's not dead time, that's a lifetime. You're learning, okay? So that's the attitude that you want to apply to any circumstance in life. And so I would tell people stuck in these horrible jobs, I would say, look, you've got a. This was one case I'm thinking of in particular. You're 27, you've got a wife, you've got two kids, and they're depending on you for Support. You've got a crap job, you can't quit because you need to support them. But if you keep going on, you're going to kill yourself. You're so unhappy. Here's what you do, all right? You get online, there's something that excites you, that interests you. First of all, we discussed what maybe could be a career that interested him. Okay? Alright. Get online and start researching it a little bit. Researching the schools, the night classes you can take, the things. The great thing about the Internet is you can learn skills online. There's all kind of online courses. Find something like that. Okay? We discussed it, he found it. And then I said, all right, an hour every night after you come home, you're going to devote to following these courses online. Okay? In six months, you're going to take classes at a real school. Just telling him that, just coming up with that plan flipped a switch in his brain and he wasn't unhappy anymore. He was feeling good, he was feeling hopeful. He had a plan. And that's what it takes in life. You just have to have some hope and a plan.
Randall
One of the things I think that's important to our growth and our success is finding great mentors in life. We're here today because you're mentoring Max Schlermerhorn, who's an incredible guy. He's sitting right over there right now. How important is mentorship in all of our success and how does someone have Robert Greene become their mentor?
Robert Greene
Well, first of all, Max is more successful than I am, so I should be mentoring under him.
Randall
Max is a fucking stud.
Robert Greene
Yeah, yeah. You know, when it comes to money, he's certainly making more money than I ever did. So I should be studying under Max. But anyway, by the way, for those.
Randall
People who don't know Max, he's 20 years old.
Robert Greene
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. How do you think that makes me feel? Right. I didn't make any money until I was 37, 38. Anyway, mentorship is very important because it can accelerate the learning process. So if you sit there and go, God, 10,000 hours, seven years, how depressing. But if you have a good mentor who can steer you in the right direction, that knows the mistakes you're going to make, that knows, don't go this path, follow this path, don't do this, do that, instead, you're going to save time, you're not going to make the same mistakes. You're not going to slog your way through the battlefield. You'll have more energy and more direction. It can save you time. It's Also like the equivalent of a second parent, because you don't get to choose your parents. Sometimes that's okay, sometimes it's not. And the second parent is somebody you get to choose. And you choose them not because they're highly successful, not because they look good or they've got charisma. You choose them because you want to follow their path. There's somebody you admire, your spirits align and it's a really enriching human experience. We were talking earlier about dating and how inhuman it can be. Well, mentoring is a very human one on one experience where you're interacting with someone who knows a lot more than you. And it's very exciting and it's very direct and it's very immediate and it can save you a lot of time and energy. It's a very enriching experience that not many people really get to have in life. And I'm telling you, in the book Mastery, I explain the kind of mentors, mentees, mentors. I'm sorry that you should choose because you need to choose wisely. But as for me, probably besides Max, well, I can't take credit for Max's success because that's pretty much on his own. But I was the mentor to Ryan Holiday, who we all know is a highly successful best selling author.
Randall
Huge.
Robert Greene
Yeah, yeah. He's written more books than I have and he's, you know, like half my age. And he was my mentee. And it was great because he was so smart and it was a lot of fun for me because I spent so much of my time alone in my office thinking I don't have as much human interaction as I like. And here was somebody that I could bounce ideas off of and he was, he was really smart and it worked. And it was very satisfying for me to take Ryan and instruct him. I cannot take credit for his success, don't get me wrong. But I helped him figure out how to write. I gave him the scheme, the bare bones of how to write a book and how to write a best selling book. I showed him the way, the path. I gave him my system of taking notes. I showed him how to research and he took it to another level. But it's immensely satisfying for me. I don't have any children, you know, for good or for bad. I consider my children my seven books. Right. But having Ryan is almost like the son to me. He's almost like the kid I never had. So it's a very satisfying feeling for me.
Randall
One of the things that's contributed to my success is something I call extreme preparation. I'm writing a book by the same title. It's something I coach and teach. How important has out preparing everybody else. When someone's spending 10 hours for something, you're spending reading 200 books, preparing for your next book been your success?
Robert Greene
Preparation is extremely important. It's one of the most important laws in the 48 laws. Plan all the way to the end. And, you know, people don't understand planning and preparation. They think of it as kind of drudgery, something that's kind of painful. But actually, preparation and planning can be a hell of a lot of fun if you look at it the right way. All of your creative energy goes into those years of preparing you foreseeing the consequences of your action. What could go wrong? What if this happens? Well, I'm going to go in this direction or that direction. It gives you freedom. It's a very liberating sentiment. I talk in my war book, I talk about the great film director Alfred Hitchcock. If you've ever been on a film set like I have, it's utter chaos. Everybody yelling and screaming. There's so many millions of dollars at stake. Actors have their ego. The producers have their ego. It's hel, right? It's literally hell, okay? Alfred Hitchcock would be on the set and he'd be falling asleep. He'd be snoozing. No, couldn't understand what the hell's going on here. He's not even directing. They nicknamed him Buddha because he was just like, calm almost to the tent of snoring on set. The reason he was, he was so prepared. He had figured everything out in advance. To the details of the costumes that the women would wear, the colors that they would be, the way he would edit it, exactly the lighting that he wanted, how they. They would deliver their lines. He worked on the script in advance so that it would be the kind of script that he wanted. Everything was prepared in advance so he could be calm. Being prepared allows you that kind of calmness because you've foreseen all of the possible things that can go wrong. And when they do go wrong, you have an answer. You don't panic. You don't go make some stupid decision that's going to set everything, make everything worse. You thought it in advance. You don't have the perfect answer, but you have a good enough answer and things go back on the tracks and everything's sort of smooth. Preparation gives you that feeling of calmness and confidence. The more you prepare, the calmer you will be and the more confident you will be heading into any kind of situation. So, you know, life is like a battlefield. It's chaotic, it's messy, there's smoke everywhere, there's soldiers die. And when you look at the level there, everything seems confusing. But if you climb up 100ft and you're on the side of a mountain, you look down, things kind of make sense. You can see patterns. If you climb to the top of the mountain, you see everything clearly. You understand exactly where people are, how it's going to progress. Climbing up that mountain and seeing further into the future, being better prepared is being like a God. You understand the situation kind of a godlike way. Preparation is extremely important, and I use it in great detail for my work.
Randall
We're at the end of our show, and I always conclude the end of my show with a game called fill in the blank to excellence. Are you ready to play?
Robert Greene
Not really. I'm not good at these kind of things.
Randall
Here we go. Well, we got some great questions for you. The biggest lesson I've learned in my.
Robert Greene
Life is don't learn lessons. Just be open to the moment. No circumstance is the same, and you have to kind of see what's going on in the present and don't be trapped in the past. So if I learned a lesson when I was 21, it will not be relevant to when I'm in my 60s.
Randall
My number one professional goal is to.
Robert Greene
Write a couple more books that maybe go off in different directions. I've always been somebody who was kind of a failed novelist. I'd like to write some fiction. That would be my professional goal, to have, like, three or four more books in me before I die. And they kind of get out some of my weirdness that I have in my head.
Randall
My number one personal goal is to.
Robert Greene
Live as long as my mother and to be healthy.
Randall
The one thing everybody should say to themselves when they wake up in the.
Robert Greene
Morning is it's insane to be alive. It's like the strangest experience anyone could ever have imagined. To be in the year 2025 and to know who we were 50, 60,000 years ago, to know the history of the planet and the cosmos, to be alive. And the chances of you not being alive and being who you are are so incredible. You should wake up and just say, man, this is awesome. This is unbelievable. It's like being on a drug.
Randall
My biggest regret is my motto in.
Robert Greene
Life is, as they say in French, moi j? Ne regretrien. I don't regret anything because everything had a purpose to it. Amor fatih is my Motto. My biggest fear is writing a book that nobody likes.
Randall
The craziest thing that's happened in my.
Robert Greene
Career is writing a book with 50 Cent and spending six months with him and going and having the weirdest experiences I've ever had.
Randall
The funniest thing that's happened in my career is, I don't know if it's.
Robert Greene
The funniest, but for so long I was just this writer of books. Nobody knew what I looked like or anything. And now all of a sudden people are coming up to me on the street, which I've never had before. And you know, my wife is with me and like, it's really weird and it kind of makes me laugh and it makes me feel really good. But it's happening more and more when it's all because of social media.
Randall
The best advice I've ever received is.
Robert Greene
Do what you love and don't and the money will come.
Randall
The worst advice I've ever received is.
Robert Greene
Become a lawyer or a doctor.
Randall
Robert if you could pick one trait that contributed to someone's success, it would.
Robert Greene
Be being able to take criticism.
Randall
The most important quality of a leader.
Robert Greene
Is continuing to learn and not feeling like they have all the answers.
Randall
The one quality that's going to make you a horrific leader is the opposite.
Robert Greene
Thinking you know everything.
Randall
Ten years from now I'm going to be alive. The most important thing that's contributed to.
Robert Greene
My success is I think it's not being afraid to be weird and unique and different.
Randall
The biggest problem in the United States.
Robert Greene
Today is too many fearful people, not enough people willing to take chances and risks.
Randall
The biggest problem in the world today.
Robert Greene
Is, well, unfortunately I would say it's global warming and climate change.
Randall
The biggest problem with young professionals today.
Robert Greene
Is they're too much in a hurry to make money.
Randall
The one thing I've dreamt about doing for a long time but haven't is.
Robert Greene
My body is the way it is. But you know, I was a long distance swimmer and I wanted to like do this incredible long distance swimming in the ocean. Never be able to do it.
Randall
If I could go back and give my 21 year old self one piece of advice, it would be, you're doing fine.
Robert Greene
Don't worry, everything will work out in the end. Don't listen to my advice. Just do what you're doing.
Randall
If you could meet one person in the world who is alive today, it.
Robert Greene
Would be Bob Dylan.
Randall
If you could have dinner with any person in the world other than Bob Dylan, who would it be?
Robert Greene
Maybe Shohei Ohtani, Somebody like That my.
Randall
Guess is you could probably have dinner with them. Probably have the right. I think you know a lot of the right people and I'm sure there are a lot of fans who work for the Dodgers.
Robert Greene
Oh, God, I'm a huge Dodger fan. Anyway, so, yeah, if you were President.
Randall
Trump today, the next thing you would do is resign.
Robert Greene
Sorry, I'm letting out my true colors, but that's what I would say.
Randall
If you were on your deathbed and you had 30 seconds before you passed away and had to tell your girlfriend, Anna of 29 years, one piece of advice before you died, what would that be?
Robert Greene
Enjoy the rest of your life. Marry someone else. Remember me, but don't get stuck in the past.
Randall
The one question you wish I had asked you but didn't is you didn't.
Robert Greene
Ask me about the book that I'm writing.
Randall
Tell us about the book that you're writing.
Robert Greene
I'm writing a book on the sublime. It's a little bit inspired by my near death experience six years ago when I had my stroke, but it was a book that I'd been planning to write since probably the year 2005. And essentially my idea is that there's a realm of experience out there that we don't get to have because we're afraid, because we live in these kind of limited circles of conventions and rules and what other people are doing. And outside that circle are experiences that are new, that are unpredictable, that are exciting, that reveal to you that life is this incredibly strange and bizarre journey. But you're too enmeshed in your phone and your small worlds, whereas there's something cosmic out there trying to open your eyes to the strangeness of being alive, to the insanity of living on this planet Earth in this infinite cosmos of what it means to have a brain, to share the planet with these strange animals that we share it with, you know, on and on and on. And so I'm trying to mine this feeling I've had because it's not an intellectual book. It's a feeling sensation about how there are things that you can't put into words that are so powerful and they're the best experiences that you can have in life. That's sort of what the book is. It's a departure for me. And a lot of people are going to scratch their heads and go, is this the guy who wrote the 48 laws of power? What happened to him?
Randall
Is there a publication date next year.
Robert Greene
Fall of next year?
Randall
My last question is, are there any questions that you want to ask me?
Robert Greene
How did you think this interview went?
Randall
I loved it. I absolutely loved it.
Robert Greene
Okay.
Randall
Your answers are insightful, educational, motivational, and inspirational. And that is the goal of my show.
Robert Greene
Did I keep them short enough?
Randall
Well, you know, we had a lot to cover, and I know we're here for some. Some period of time, but that's one of the best interviews I think I've ever done. And you're one of the most fascinating, talented people I've ever heard.
Robert Greene
I wasn't fishing for that, but I just.
Randall
Yeah, but I'm giving it to you anyway.
Robert Greene
Okay. Okay. Thank you. Well, thanks, Randall. That was really exciting.
Randall
I really appreciate you being here. Shout out to Max again for.
Robert Greene
Yeah, thank you, Max.
Randall
You know, setting this up. Grateful. Great guy. Great future ahead of him. Thank you. I look forward to getting to know you better and seeing you again.
Robert Greene
Yeah, I do, too. I choose to, since we're practically neighbors.
Randall
We're neighbors.
Robert Greene
At least my mother is.
Randall
Pleasure to meet you.
Robert Greene
Pleasure to meet you, too, man.
In Search Of Excellence: Robert Greene on Attraction, Influence, and Mastery
Episode: Robert Greene: The Secret Psychology Behind Attraction and Influence | E159
Release Date: April 15, 2025
In this compelling episode of In Search Of Excellence, host Randall Kaplan engages in a deep and insightful conversation with Robert Greene, the acclaimed six-time New York Times bestselling author known for his works such as The 48 Laws of Power, The Art of Seduction, and Mastery. This detailed summary captures the essence of their discussion, delving into Greene's perspectives on seduction, vulnerability, mastery, mentorship, and personal growth.
Randall Kaplan opens the conversation by probing into the nature of insecurity and vulnerability:
Robert Greene responds with a straightforward approach:
Greene emphasizes that success builds genuine confidence, distinguishing it from "fake confidence" which often masks insecurity.
A significant portion of the discussion revolves around seduction, a central theme in Greene's works.
Randall introduces the topic:
Greene elaborates:
He distinguishes between warm and cold seducers:
Warm Seducer: Genuinely interested in the other person, fostering authentic connections.
Cold Seducer: Predatory, often seeking superficial gains like sex without emotional involvement.
Greene [04:23]: "There has to be a mutual back and forth... because when it only comes from one side... it lacks that energy."
Moreover, Greene introduces the concept of the anti-seducer, identifying traits that repel rather than attract, such as being self-centered or judgmental.
Exploring vulnerability, Greene connects it to effective leadership and meaningful relationships.
Randall [07:19]: "You've talked about seduction is also a matter of vulnerability. I think vulnerability is one of the most underrepresented qualities of being a leader. How do people become more vulnerable and peel away all that exterior armor so they have better relationships?"
Greene [07:38]: Vulnerability requires letting go of ego and embracing the possibility of being hurt. He asserts that:
Embracing vulnerability leads to resilience and deeper interpersonal connections.
One of Greene's pivotal topics is mastery—the highest form of human achievement.
Randall [21:45]: "Why did you write the book, and what does Mastery actually mean?"
Greene [21:53]: Mastery involves leveraging the human brain's immense capabilities to achieve intuitive excellence in a chosen field. He describes it as:
Greene underscores that mastery is not about superficial success but about deep, sustained engagement and excellence.
The conversation shifts to the importance of mentorship in personal and professional growth.
Randall [44:49]: "How important is mentorship in all of our success and how does someone have Robert Greene become their mentor?"
Greene [45:12]: Mentorship can significantly accelerate the learning process by providing guidance, preventing common mistakes, and offering emotional support. He shares his experience mentoring Ryan Holiday, highlighting the reciprocal benefits of such relationships.
Greene offers actionable advice for individuals feeling stagnant or unhappy in their careers.
Randall [30:33]: Discusses the challenge of finding purpose for mid-career professionals.
Greene [31:44]: While identifying one's unique purpose is complex, he suggests that inherent uniqueness and personal sensitivities guide one's life's task.
He encourages leveraging existing skills and passions to pivot into fulfilling avenues, as demonstrated by the story of boxing coach Freddie Roach transitioning into a successful mentorship role despite not being a master boxer himself.
Differentiating between passion and desire, Greene provides insight into motivation.
Randall [36:53]: Asks about the role of passion in mastery.
Greene [37:00]: Prefers the term desire over passion, describing it as a more controlled and sustainable form of motivation.
He illustrates this with his personal experience of rapidly learning French to win over someone he was attracted to, highlighting how desire enhances learning efficiency.
Addressing contemporary challenges in dating, Greene critiques the reliance on digital platforms.
Randall [19:03]: Discusses the shift from traditional to app-based dating.
Greene [19:21]: Advocates for developing genuine social skills through real-life interactions rather than relying on virtual connections.
He warns against the superficial nature of app-based relationships and emphasizes the importance of face-to-face communication in building meaningful connections.
Greene emphasizes meticulous preparation as a cornerstone of success.
Randall [48:46]: Highlights extreme preparation as a key to success.
Greene [49:11]: Aligns preparation with strategic planning, likening it to Alfred Hitchcock's methodical approach on film sets.
He argues that thorough preparation not only anticipates potential challenges but also instills a sense of control and readiness in chaotic situations.
In the concluding segment, Greene shares personal aspirations and thoughts on life.
Greene [52:20]: Reflects on life's uniqueness, urging listeners to appreciate their existence.
Greene [55:07]: Expresses no regrets, embracing the philosophy of destiny and purpose.
Greene [57:07]: Discusses his upcoming book on the sublime, inspired by his near-death experience, aiming to explore profound and indescribable human experiences.
Robert Greene [00:04]: "The best way to not be insecure is to succeed."
Robert Greene [04:23]: "You want the opposite thing. To be rejected is okay. It's a good thing in life."
Robert Greene [07:38]: "You want to fail in life, you want adversity. Failing in life is the best education that can ever happen to you."
Robert Greene [21:53]: "Mastery is using that brain that you were gifted with to the maximum effect."
Robert Greene [45:12]: "Mentorship is very important because it can accelerate the learning process."
Robert Greene [37:00]: "Desire is the key to learning in anything."
Robert Greene [19:21]: "Social skills are a muscle. And if you don't ever exercise that muscle, you're just going to be really flabby and you'll never get anywhere."
Robert Greene [49:11]: "Preparation gives you that feeling of calmness and confidence."
Robert Greene [52:20]: "It's insane to be alive. It's like the strangest experience anyone could ever have imagined."
This episode offers a wealth of knowledge from Robert Greene, intertwining his expertise in power dynamics, seduction, and mastery with personal anecdotes and actionable advice. Listeners gain a deeper understanding of how to navigate insecurities, build authentic relationships, pursue mastery, and leverage mentorship for accelerated growth. Greene's insights encourage embracing vulnerability, preparing meticulously, and cultivating genuine desire over fleeting passion—all essential components on the path to excellence.
Whether you're seeking personal development or professional mastery, Greene's perspectives provide valuable guidance to overcome obstacles and achieve meaningful success.