Podcast
It’s Both — Personal Growth For Real Life Transitions
Hosted by Nikki P · EN
If you’re living in the tension—mixed emotions, unclear answers, big decisions—this show helps with navigating transitions, overthinking, decision making, and emotional intelligence so you can find clarity and calm in real life.
It’s Both is for people who feel the pull of two truths at once. Hosted by therapist-turned-storyteller Nikki P, each episode blends honest conversations with simple, practical tools—one kind next step at a time. We talk boundaries, anxiety, identity shifts, starting over after divorce, career pivots, faith questions, and more—always through a both/and lens.
Expect real stories (not toxic positivity), language for mixed emotions, and frameworks that help you move forward without abandoning yourself. Whether you’re rebuilding identity, deconstructing and reconstructing faith, or stepping into a new season, this space helps you feel seen, feel less alone, and make gentler choices as you grow through transition.
Because life isn’t either/or—it’s both.
20episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
Hell, Hope, & Emotional Intelligence ft. Brian Recker
Jan 2701:03:23Tap to summarizeWhat happens when fear-based faith collapses—and you’re left to rebuild meaning without certainty? In this conversation with Brian Recker, we explore emotional intelligence as a grounding skill for navigating doubt, loss, and change without abandoning yourself. Together, we talk about how ideas like hell, punishment, and certainty shape the nervous system—and how emotional intelligence helps create clarity, self-compassion, and steadier decision making during seasons of deconstruction and identity shift. This episode offers language for holding mixed emotions, naming grief & growth, and staying present when faith no longer fits the way it used to. You’ll hear practical reflections on: - Emotional intelligence as a tool for uncertainty and inner conflict - Letting go of fear without rushing into false clarity - How grief and imagination interact during belief changes - Rebuilding trust in yourself after systems break down - Navigating transitions with honesty, agency, and compassion If you’re starting over spiritually, questioning inherited beliefs, or learning how to live without clear answers, this conversation offers grounded perspective for navigating transitions—without shame, pressure, or certainty traps. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Follow Brian Recker on Instagram, visit his website, & buy his book Hell Bent - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation
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Life Transitions After Purity Culture | ft. Linda Kay Klein
Jan 2001:00:00Tap to summarizeLife transitions after purity culture can feel disorienting—shame, mixed messages, and binary thinking collide. With Linda Kay Klein, we name what life transitions look like during deconstruction and map one kinder next step so you don’t abandon yourself. We unpack what “purity culture” is, how right/wrong binaries create internal tornadoes, why bothness (grief and relief) shows up in change, and the real ways it shapes adulthood and sexuality. Linda shares a practical three-part recovery path—deconstruction + reconstruction together, finding solidarity so you’re not alone, and (when ready) turning healing outward. If you’ve felt torn between who you were told to be and who you’re becoming, this conversation offers language, relief, and a gentler way forward. If you’re navigating life transitions, follow for new episodes Tuesdays. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Follow Linda Kay Klein on Instagram & visit her website - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation
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Trust Your Inner Knowing: Decision Making — Rob Bell Pt 2
Jan 1300:38:21Tap to summarizeFeeling torn between selflessness and self-care while navigating transitions? In Part 2 with Rob Bell, we talk about reclaiming your inner knowing, how clarity emerges through stillness, and why healing isn’t “late”—it’s right on time. You’ll hear a practical reframe for decision making when life feels complex, plus Nikki’s story of how a boundary/self-trust question from 10 years ago changed the trajectory of her life. In this episode, we cover: - How systems and power structures can train you to doubt your own intuition - “The juice of life”: making choices without the fear of one perfect answer - Self-care vs. selflessness (and why taking care of yourself expands what you can give) - “Right on time” healing: releasing urgency and rebuilding peace of mind - How to stay engaged with a hard world without losing yourself This episode builds on Part 1 (“The Certainty Trap & Emotional Intelligence”). Listen to Part 1 HERE first for deeper context. Follow It’s Both — Personal growth for real-life transitions for weekly conversations on growth, clarity, and real-life change. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Follow Rob Bell on Instagram & visit his website - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts
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The Certainty Trap & Overthinking - Rob Bell Pt 1
Jan 600:46:18Tap to summarizeFeeling stuck chasing the “right” answer? This episode uses emotional intelligence to break the certainty trap—so you can get out of your head, back into your body, and hold joy and grief side by side without spiraling. In Part 1 with Rob Bell, we explore why binary thinking feels like safety (and why it’s often scarcity in disguise), the relationship between grief and imagination, and how learning to feel what’s true can unlock clarity and your next step. In this episode, you’ll hear: - Why the mind craves either/or—and how the heart can hold both - How “rightness” can masquerade as moral certainty while actually fueling scarcity - The grief → imagination link (and why grief moves in waves) - Why we get stuck in our heads (and what it costs us) - A freeing reframe for the “I should be farther along” story This is Part 1. In Part 2, we get more practical about self-trust, embodiment, and choosing without certainty. Follow the show so you don’t miss Part 2—and share this with a friend who’s in the messy middle. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation - Follow Rob Bell on Instagram & visit his website - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts
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Year’s End: Navigating Transitions with Grief and Gratitude
Dec 2300:21:08Tap to summarizeFeeling mixed emotions at the end of the year? This solo reflection is for anyone navigating transitions while holding grief and gratitude at the same time—without forcing clarity or burning out. I share honestly about loneliness, identity shifts in motherhood, career changes, community loss, and our family’s upcoming move. You’ll hear why reflection (before resolutions) restores clarity, energy, and self-compassion—and how to honor what’s hard without minimizing what’s good. In this episode, you’ll get: - A calm reflection practice for the messy middle - How to hold grief and gratitude without choosing one - A nervous-system-friendly approach to big decisions - Language for naming loneliness and staying connected - A preview of the January faith series (Rob Bell, Linda Kay Klein, Brian Recker, David Perez) I’m off next week and back in January. If this resonated, follow the show, rate & review on Apple Podcasts, and share it with someone who’s holding a lot right now. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts - Follow the show on Instagram
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Healing Trauma in Your Body with Emotional Intelligence
Dec 1601:03:26Tap to summarizeFeel stuck in survival mode even though you “know” what you feel? This episode uses emotional intelligence to reconnect mind and body—so you can stop performing healing and start coming home to yourself. Therapist and educator Janice Holland (The Trauma Teacher) joins Nikki P to unpack what trauma really is (“what happens inside us”), how fight/flight/freeze/fawn show up in everyday life, and how to build safety without overwhelming your nervous system. In this episode, we cover: - Trauma as disconnection—and healing as reconnection - Fight/flight/freeze/fawn and how they map to overworking, numbness, and people-pleasing - How to build capacity slowly (desire, micro-choices, safe people) - Holiday boundaries: simple scripts + the reframe that makes them possible - Signals of real progress: sleep, digestion, ease, laughter, and less guilt If this helped, follow the show and share it with a friend who needs language for what they’re living. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation - Follow Janice Holland, The Trauma Teacher, on Instagram & YouTube - Get connected with Janice Janice Holland, The Trauma Teacher - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts
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Divorce: Grief, Relief & Navigating Transitions ft. Oona Metz
Dec 900:55:10Tap to summarizeFeeling isolated, ashamed, or torn about divorce? If you’re navigating transitions with mixed emotions—grief and relief, anger and longing—this conversation will help you name what’s true with more self-compassion, clarity, and peace of mind. Therapist and author Oona Metz (founder of long-running divorce support groups for women; Unhitched: The Essential Divorce Guide for Women) explains why stress can make reading hard, how community reduces shame, and the language shifts that soften guilt and stigma (like “parenting time” vs. “custody” and “family restructuring” vs. “failed marriage”). We also talk through identity shift after divorce, letting go of attachment, and practical boundaries with family (and an unhealthy ex) so you can rebuild without losing yourself. In this episode, you’ll learn: - How to hold mixed emotions without self-judgment (and why nuance matters) - Why shame loves silence—and how support groups create self-awareness and confidence - A clear way to define what’s a safety issue vs. what you can let go - Co-parenting boundaries that reduce anxiety, uncertainty, and decision fatigue - The mindset shift from “who filed first” to “who left the marriage” (releasing guilt) - How healing and personal growth start with small acts of agency (even fixing the faucet/door) If you’re considering separation, in the messy middle, or rebuilding on the other side, you’re not alone—and you don’t have to do this without support. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Follow Oona Metz on Instagram - Get connected with Oona Metz (with links to order her upcoming book) - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions
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Stress, HRV, and Emotional Intelligence ft. Matt Bennett
Dec 200:59:54Tap to summarizeFeeling productive but still wiped out? This episode connects emotional intelligence to your stress response through HRV (heart rate variability), so you can build real capacity instead of white-knuckling your way through burnout. Matt Bennett—author, trauma-informed care leader, and co-founder/CEO of Optimal HRV—breaks down HRV in plain English: what it measures, why flexibility matters, and how your nervous system handles and recovers from stress over time. We also talk about midlife identity shifts, post-traumatic growth, and the paradox of feeling more alive while still asking, “Who am I becoming?” In this episode, you’ll learn: - HRV explained simply (and why it’s a powerful resiliency metric) - The difference between pushing through vs. building capacity with small habits - How to approach stress as a “positive challenge” without tipping into overwhelm - Practical nervous-system supports: breathwork, sleep consistency, habit stacking - What it looks like to sit with uncertainty and transitions without spiraling If this resonated, follow the show and share it with someone who’s been running on fumes. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Get connected with Matt Bennett - Learn more about Heart Rate Variability (HRV) - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation
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Code Switching and Overthinking ft. Darius Moore
Nov 1801:01:32Tap to summarizeHave you ever noticed yourself talking one way at work and another way with friends—and wondered which one is the real you? If you’re overthinking whether you’re adapting to be understood or disappearing to be accepted, this conversation will put language to what you’re carrying. Darius Moore shares how growing up in a military family and moving between rural West Tennessee, Nashville, corporate rooms, and community spaces shaped the way he communicates—and why code switching can be both a burden and a bridge. We talk about identity shift, belonging, and the emotional load of “disarming” assumptions (especially in workplaces), plus how perspective and love can guide the way you show up without losing yourself. In this episode, you’ll learn: - How to notice when adaptation turns into people-pleasing - Self-awareness cues for “performing” vs. connecting (and why it drives anxiety) - Boundaries at work that protect your voice without shutting down - How to hold mixed emotions about home, culture, and success with self-compassion - Why words and tone shape identity—and how to find more clarity and peace of mind - The hidden weight of always scanning a room (and how to let someone else carry it) Come for the story; leave with grounded language for uncertainty, duality, and showing up with integrity in complex spaces. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation
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Improv for Anxiety and Overthinking ft. Emma Supica
Nov 1101:00:17Tap to summarizeDo you ever feel stuck between wanting control and craving freedom—between anxious spirals and playful spontaneity? If you’re overthinking your next move, this episode shows a surprisingly practical way to loosen the grip without pretending anxiety isn’t real. Nikki P talks with educator, speaker, and improviser Emma Supica (founding Executive Director of Unscripted) about how improv builds nervous-system flexibility, strengthens self-awareness, and helps you practice emotional regulation in a supported environment. You’ll hear why “yes, and” isn’t just a stage skill—it’s a real-life tool for mixed emotions, uncertainty, and navigating change with more clarity. In this episode, you’ll learn: - Why anxiety feels like “a lion is coming” (and how to calm the body) - How “mistakes are gifts” reduces fear of failure and people-pleasing - A simple presence practice that stops mental rehearsing mid-conversation - How play and community support create peace of mind (without toxic positivity) - What to do when you’re over capacity: grace, boundaries, and micro-choices - How to build confidence by choosing connection over performance If you’re in a life transition and craving more ease, this one will help you hold both preparation and permission to be messy. Get Connected & Support the Show: - Listen to the companion podcast: It's Both- Guided Meditations for Anxiety, Emotional Regulation, & Real Life Transitions - Get connected with Emma - Learn more about Unscripted or follow them on Instagram - Subscribe, rate, & review It's Both on Apple Podcasts - Join the Courageous Living Group Transformation
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