Honey, I Shrunk the Racist

Summary

“I’VE HAD IT” – EPISODE SUMMARY
Episode: "Honey, I Shrunk the Racist"
Date: July 16, 2026
Hosts: Jennifer Welch & Angie “Pumps” Sullivan
Special Guest/Producer: Kylie (intermittent appearances)

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Episode Overview

This episode of "I've Had It" is classic Jennifer and Angie: a comedic, irreverent, and incisive look at trends and cultural moments that make them (and listeners) say, “I’ve had it!” From themed lunches and the infantilization of kids, to performative patriotism and mom groups run amok, the pair take aim at the absurdities and contradictions of modern American life. With their signature blend of banter and biting humor, they skewer everything from 80s-themed professional gatherings to viral parenting posts, all the while threading in commentary on political discourse, gender roles, and American exceptionalism.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. "Forced Fun" & Themed Events

[01:43–07:27]

• Angie’s I’ve Had It: Being invited to an 80s-themed professional lunch.
  • Angie refuses to dress up, equating the ordeal to unnecessary juvenile fun:
    “I don't want to wear my Cyndi Lauper best to lunch. … I hate fun.” (02:10)
  • Connects themed events to people who just “want to do a little drag”:
    “There's little drag queen in everyone.” – Jennifer (02:55)
• The duo deconstructs how themed events have proliferated in places where they don’t belong, especially among professionals "of a certain age."
• Speculation on the irrational motivation behind these gatherings—probably "liquored up" decisions:
  “I got the text after 7:30 in the evening. It’s a liquored up situation.” – Angie (07:21)

Memorable Moment:
“It's like I think somebody got a little liquored up... Somebodys like, 'let's dress 1980s!' … and then nobody talks anybody off the ledge.” – Jennifer (06:53)

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2. Critique ≠ Hatred: The “You Hate America” Trap

[08:31–13:12]

• Jennifer rails against the tactic of framing criticism of the country as “hating America,” citing its prevalence in political discourse.
• Uses a focus group anecdote about Trump’s “hugging the flag” as an example of shallow patriotism (09:39).
  • “When he hugged that American flag on stage, he just really loves America.” – Jennifer mock quoting focus group (09:39)
• Angie and Jennifer agree: healthy critique is not mutually exclusive with love; nuanced discussion is essential.
  • “If you don't care enough to criticize...you really don't care about your opinion that much.” – Angie (10:08)
  • “The opposite of love is not hate, it is ambivalence.” – Angie (10:35)
• They lament the loss of nuance and how “kindergarten arguments” shut down valuable dialogue.

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3. Parenting Absurdities on the Internet

[19:14–37:01]

• The trio react to viral mom group posts (from Buzzfeed) highlighting over-the-top, entitled, or just plain odd parenting behaviors:
  • Expecting teachers to wipe kids’ butts in pre-K [21:53].
  • Naming a baby "Tenderleigh" after meeting on Tinder [24:30].
  • “Unschooling” a child and hoping they’ll teach themselves to read [27:07].
    • “Kids are just notorious decision makers. … When I need a decision made, I think let’s have a child make that decision.” – Jennifer (28:52)
  • Wanting gym training for a 27-month-old [29:55].
  • Refusing to use soap on children and crediting breast milk with curing ailments (including dog eyeball cancer) [30:25].
    • “I healed my dog's eyeball cancer with my breast milk.” – Jennifer quoting the post (31:20)
  • Seeking advice on how to carry both a baby and a firearm [35:16].
    • “More America than all of this.” – Jennifer (36:44)
• They poke fun at anti-soap, anti-school, and ultra-militant “natural” parenting, weaving back to broader political satire.

Notable Quote:
“Swap out the cleaning, disinfecting nature of soap with the rotting, mildewing, curdling nature of milk. Really shows the stupidity that's running amok on the Internet.” – Jennifer (32:59)

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4. Performative Patriotism & Identity Politics

[12:35–13:12]

• Jennifer analyzes why propaganda targeting the “libs” sticks in rural, “flyover” America:
  • “A lot of these People identify … being American. That’s a huge cultural thing, because they don’t participate in much else culturally.” – Jennifer (12:35)
• Ties the shallow patriotism to a lack of broader cultural participation and a susceptibility to political manipulation.

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5. Review from Abroad & Reflections on American Stereotypes

[16:35–17:09]

• Kylie reads a heartfelt review from a Canadian listener appreciating the show’s wit and sanity amidst the “American reality shit show.”
• Jennifer takes pains to apologize for American stereotypes—especially during the Trump years—confirming her sensitivity to the nation’s global image.

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6. Viral Trends: Suit Tailoring for Muscle Bros & “Pink Arm” Discourse

[42:59–47:25]

• The hosts riff on the trend of men’s “muscle tailoring” in suits, mocking the cultural obsession with protein and physique [43:59].
• They dissect a menswear expert’s teardown of Stephen Miller’s ill-tailored suits, poking fun at Miller’s “pink arm” and lack of muscle tone.
  • "The shoulder line is completely unpadded... which is curved like a rainbow." (44:36)
  • “This is exactly what a pink arm is.” – Jennifer (45:21)
  • "He does look like a threatened anteater. I think that's absolutely perfect." – Jennifer (47:09)
• Much of this discussion doubles as political shade at Miller and other Republican figures, zeroing in on appearance as a new battleground for cultural critique and humor.

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7. Voice Memo: “Sports Mom” Culture

[49:12–53:19]

• Listener Nick sends a voice memo venting frustrations about the “sports mom” arms race—over-spending, over-sacrificing, and performative motherhood.
  • “I’m so freaking sick and tired of an expectation being set that women should basically have to sacrifice themselves at the altar of motherhood. ... I’m not going to bankrupt myself for an 8 year old to play travel ball.” – Nick (49:22)
• Angie and Jennifer lament the exploitative youth sports industry and recall personal stories of sideline fanaticism.
  • “The kids sports thing has turned into a big exploitation. ... The pressure being put on parents ... exacerbated by the Internet and performative parenting.” – Jennifer (51:55)
  • Angie shares her son's traumatizing umpiring experience as a teen (51:22).

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8. Capitalism & The Supply-Side Childhood

[53:19–54:21]

• Riffing on the sports mom problem, the hosts reflect on how private equity and capitalism have invaded childhood—and parenting—turning everything into consumer "rackets."
• “You have this fleet of people that all they see is just exploiting. … It's like, just be a mom.” – Jennifer (53:32)

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9. Miscellaneous Highlights & Banter

• Jennifer hints at her upcoming interview with Hunter Biden on their other podcast “I Hip News,” with both hosts giving Biden glowing (and funny) reviews [13:15–15:58].
• Angie discusses “buyer's remorse” over her kids’ ordinary names given new, outlandish baby name trends [26:21–27:17].
• General banter about dating, attractiveness, and Kylie’s interjections pepper the episode, maintaining the hilarious and abrasive tone that the show is known for.

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Favorite Quotes & Moments

• “The opposite of love is not hate. It is ambivalence.” – Angie (10:35)
• “Kids are just notorious decision makers. … Let's have a child make that decision.” – Jennifer (28:52)
• “I healed my dog's eyeball cancer with my breast milk.” – Jennifer, quoting viral post (31:20)
• “This is exactly what a pink arm is.” – Jennifer (45:21)
• “He does look like a threatened anteater. I think that's absolutely perfect.” – Jennifer (47:09)
• “I'm not going to bankrupt myself for an 8 year old to play travel ball. It's absolutely absurd.” – Nick, listener voicemail (49:22)
• “Send your kids to school. The teachers are not drag queens. And you should be so lucky if they are.” – Jennifer (54:00)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 80s-Themed Lunch Rant: 01:43–07:27
• Political Critique/Patriotism: 08:31–13:12
• Parenting & Viral Mom Groups: 19:14–37:01
• Muscle Suits/Pink Arms: 42:59–47:25
• Voice Memo—Sports Moms: 49:12–53:19

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The Hosts’ Tone & Style

Jennifer and Angie remain quick-witted, unapologetic, and cutting in their takedowns, employing sarcasm and playful mockery throughout. The inclusion of real-life viral posts, listener feedback, and pop culture trends maintains a comedic, conversational flow that keeps listeners both laughing and thinking.

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This episode stands out for its unfiltered criticism of performative politics, modern parenting absurdities, and the ways consumerism hijacks everyday life—all delivered in the duo’s trademark laugh-out-loud style. For anyone feeling overwhelmed by today’s American cultural landscape, this episode is as much group therapy as it is stand-up comedy.

Transcript

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[Angie]

Ready? 1, 2, 3.

[Jennifer]

Patriots gay traits Patriots Black Triots, Brown trio. We love you. All of the triple trumpers can do what?

[Kylie]

Pumps.

[Jennifer]

That was such a high pitch that even the microphone kind of muted it out.

[Angie]

That bad shrill.

[Jennifer]

No, it was that good. It was. It was that good. Okay, pumps, what have you with.

[Angie]

Oh my God. I am almost a 60 year old woman and this happened to me. Invited to a lunch that's 80s themed lunch.

[Jennifer]

And I'm like, what?

[Angie]

An 80s themed lunch? Do not invite people to a themed lunch. And this other person that was invited, I said I'm not going because I don't want to wear my Cyndi Lauper best to lunch. I'm just, I'm out. And she's like, you don't think it'll be fun? I go, no, I don't. I don't think it'll be fun. And here's what I figured. I've also been recently invited to a western theme. Here's what I think it is. I think people that think they look good in hats or wigs want to have all this juiced up costume wear. And it's just like I'm. I'm over it. Like a Halloween party. Sure. But I hate fun, so I don't. I don't want to dress up with my Cyndi Lauper blue mascara, which I loved it back in the 80s, but I'm out on themed lunches at my age.

[Jennifer]

Don't you think that everybody just wants to do a little drag? There's little drag queen in everyone. And this is presumably in Oklahoma.

[Angie]

Yeah.

[Jennifer]

What kind of group is this that's having the 80 themed lunch? What's the purpose?

[Angie]

It's just like a get together. It's a professional. It's a professional thing. Like a lawyer thing, where I have to go. It. I mean, like, I have to go, but I cannot dress up.

[Jennifer]

Why do you have to go?

[Angie]

Because it's somebody that I just. I have to go. I just have to.

[Jennifer]

Is it like they're giving this person an award?

[Angie]

No, it's just some gals getting around. It's not even a birthday. I would be wondering if it was a birthday.

[Jennifer]

Let's unpack this a little bit.

[Angie]

Okay.

[Jennifer]

Somebody is throwing a lunch for no particular reason. Correct. And the lunch is theme. So this would be like, at the end of this podcast, I say, hey, Ryan, Seth, Kylie pumps. I'm gonna get us reservations for Thursday, and it's going to be a 70s themed lunch.

[Angie]

Nailed it. That's exactly what it is. And I just think that's weird.

[Jennifer]

So there's no purpose for the lunch other than to eat and dress like you're in the 80s?

[Angie]

Correct.

[Jennifer]

Is this in a public space? A public restaurant?

[Angie]

That's the thing. Like, not that being. Not that I want to dress up as Cindy Lauper and go to somebody's house, but it's even worse. Like, why are all these old bags running around in their 80s clothes at a lot? I just. I think the whole thing's weird.

[Jennifer]

Let me ask you this. I'm not the person that's having the lunch. Listen to this podcast.

[Angie]

I sincerely doubt it. I know they're super liberal, but I would doubt that they're a podcast listener.

[Jennifer]

So my thinking is you might have just gotten yourself out of this. Especially if Kylie makes a viral clip of you talking about how stupid this is, then the person might send you a text like, forget about it. Don't come to my lunch, you twat. And then you're like, good, I didn't want to go anyway.

[Angie]

I didn't want to go anyway. And I don't want to Go anyway. But I would have gone. I am going to go, but I'm not. I'm not doing the whole thing. But these people, the other people are excited about it. They think it's fun. Now a couple are fully retired. I'm probably on the younger end of this group now that I'm thinking about it.

[Jennifer]

So other people in the restaurant. So they just got a table. So all you all presumably are going to walk in in costume in the middle of summer.

[Angie]

Yes.

[Jennifer]

And this is for no reason. There's no birthday. There's no. This person just won a huge case in front of an judge. This is just for no particular reason. I'm going to host a lunch and make everybody go buy outfits and dress up. Is at the middle of the day lunch. So presumably for some people, they might be in this get up all day.

[Angie]

Yeah.

[Jennifer]

Because it's a pretty big ask if, you know, like, if Kylie pulled some like this and I'd be like, well, I'm not going to podcast in that. Then I might have to change clothes into it.

[Kylie]

Right.

[Jennifer]

To change clothes back out of it.

[Angie]

The whole thing's stupid. And we're in a room in a. We're in the back room of a restaurant, but still, I just, I don't understand the theme. And then I got invited to a deal at a nighttime thing that's western theme. And I'm just like, the only people that want to dress western are the people that love cowboy boots and think they look good in hats. Neither of which I applied to me.

[Jennifer]

Let's dive into the details of the western themed dinner.

[Angie]

Yeah, it's a. It's a rehearsal dinner.

[Jennifer]

Okay, see, that makes more sense.

[Angie]

That makes more sense. I mean, it's fine.

[Jennifer]

I understand that a little bit more than I do. Just the random.

[Angie]

All gals doll up.

[Jennifer]

You know what it is? It's like, I think somebody got a little liquored up. Let's have a lunch. And they're like, Somebody's like, that's a great idea. Get a reservation. Somebody refills all the wine glasses. And it's like, you know what? Wouldn't it be just a scream if we all dress 1980s? And they're like, yeah, that'd be hilarious. And then nobody talks anybody off the ledge. And then here you are talking on your podcast, our very listener about it. Yes. No, I don't have friends anymore.

[Angie]

I got the text like after 7:30 in the evening.

[Jennifer]

It's a liquored up situation.

[Angie]

I think you're 100, right? Because how many Things back in the day you thought were a great idea. You know, after an all night party and then you wake up and we're like, I would have. That's the worst idea I've ever had.

[Jennifer]

Yeah, I'm with you on that. I, I'm 100% with you. And I wouldn't go. Yeah, I wouldn't go.

[Angie]

But you're good.

[Jennifer]

You're really good about this. One thing that you deliver on time and time again since I've known you is agreeing to do things that I hate doing that you hate and that you about incessantly.

[Angie]

Yeah.

[Jennifer]

Yes.

[Angie]

You know what I. Where I think I learned that? Conditioning marriage.

[Jennifer]

Considering you married somebody you didn't want to.

[Angie]

I married somebody I didn't like who I hated having sex with. So it just, it's just such an easy, easy transition to going to things I hate. That's a nothing burger by comparison.

[Jennifer]

Okay, I have had it with, Let me see, I made a list here of things. Okay, I've had it with this argument that people use in political discourse.

[Angie]

Okay.

[Jennifer]

That if you're critical of America, then their argument against you is, well, they just hate America.

[Angie]

Right, Right.

[Jennifer]

It's just such a stupid, pedestrian kindergarten argument. It's just, it's. I just can't think of anything dumber. And it seems like every time I get on the Internet some or turn on the news, somebody, some schmohawk Republican politician is saying something like, well, Zora and Momdani just hates America. It's like, no, he actually doesn't.

[Angie]

He loves America. He's trying to save America.

[Jennifer]

But this whole quantifying of loving and hating, it's so juvenile. It's such an immature thing. Like, is that really what they're thinking about? And it is what they're thinking about because I've seen these focus groups where they asked these triple Trumpers, why do you love Trump so much? And this one lady was like, I'll tell you what.

[Angie]

Yeah.

[Jennifer]

When he hugged that American flag on stage, he just really loves America. And so it works. This stupid, juvenile, immature argument works. And I just think it's so dumb. I just think it's such a dumb because it's. Of course we all love our country, but robust criticism and critique of it is so important.

[Angie]

I completely agree.

[Jennifer]

Just like your Critique of the 80s Theme Lunch doesn't mean you don't love the gal doing it.

[Angie]

I love the gal. I think the whole thing's stupid. But I love the. That's just like, I just, I'm a firm believer that unless if, if you don't care enough to criticize, you know, and it doesn't have to, but like, if you don't care enough to have an opinion and want to roundtable the opinion and open your opinion up to criticism, then you really don't care about your opinion that much. If you think that either you agree with me or go fuck yourself, then you really, that's. You really don't care that much because you would. I mean, I just think I get better when I hear other people's perspective and they disagree and we talk through the disagree. I mean, I just. For me, that's how I feel like if I care enough to criticize something, because normally I'm just like, the opposite of love is not hate. It is ambivalence. You know, I say that all the time when it comes to love.

[Jennifer]

Yeah, I, I just, my, my fundamental thing is it's just such an. A pedestrian argument that, that, that they use to end all conversation and then negate any fair criticism or any fair points. And how effective it is, how easily people are willing to be dumbed down by such a stupid argument. You know, it's like if you're in a fight with your husband and you're like, well, you just hate my guts. Well, no, that, that doesn't solve anything. The person really loves you, probably because you're married, but hates the way you're acting in this moment. And it's called nuance, you know, like, that's gone. That's what bothers me about it, is it's just how effective such a stupid argument is because it boils down to Donald Trump dry humping the American flag. And that's it for you? Like, you don't care about anything else that he does. All the other debauchery.

[Angie]

Right.

[Jennifer]

Crimes.

[Angie]

You know what's so funny is that you said that you. I saw that on a focus group too. Like, I've seen people say, well, you know, Donald Trump loves America. And I just am all like, because we laugh about the humping of American flag. Like, you fucking humped the American flag. What the fuck? And they're like, that proves how much he loves America. So it's just funny that to me that people think that that is a version of patriotism, but they do. Yeah.

[Jennifer]

I think it's a version of propaganda that's been effective. Agree that they have said liberals hate America. And the, they, they stoke this part of rural America and flyover America. They stoke this part where a lot of these People identify their identity is being American. That's like a huge cultural thing for them because they don't participate in that much else culturally. And so it lands and it's. They're able to stick the landing because they propagandize so much that the libs hate America. And it's just, to me, it's just kindergarten stuff.

[Angie]

All right, welcome.

[Jennifer]

I've had it. I'm Jennifer.

[Angie]

I'm Angie.

[Jennifer]

Okay, listener. I want to share with you guys. I know that a lot of you are just Tuesday, Thursday listeners for I've had it. Thank you for being here. We also have the other podcast I hip news and this weekend's episode that's going to drop. Saturday, I sit down in studio in New York with Hunter Biden for a one on one over an hour. He is incredibly engaging, speaks very candidly about his addiction, talks about the Biden DOJ under Merrick Garland, which was just absolutely fascinating. And surprisingly, he and I share the exact same opinion about that. He also, we talked about gay Republicans and he had a lot to say about that. So listen, do me a favor. Thanks for listening. We don't want to flood you. I know a lot of you are like political junkies. That's why we have Ihip news. But on the weekends we're trying to do longer format one on one interviews so you can kind of get to know the guest a little more. And it's.

[Angie]

He's great.

[Jennifer]

I have to say. No notes. Pumps listened in on it. Pumps, tell it. Tell them what you like, what you thought.

[Angie]

He's hilarious, first of all. And he's so candid. He's relatable. Like I wanted to hang out with him. I might go to a dinner with him where I dressed up as Cindy Lauper. You never know. He would be the. I mean, he was so fun. It's very attractive. He's fun, he's funny.

[Jennifer]

I really tell you, this is hilarious. So before he arrived, Kylie said if Pumps were here, when he walked in, the first thing she would say is, is Hunter is so attractive.

[Angie]

He is attractive.

[Jennifer]

Yeah. His wife was with him. She's a huge listener, huge fan of the pod. Cute as a button. I mean, incredibly super cute. Incredibly attractive. And then just a beautiful family. He had some of his kids with him and they were just, they were so great. It was so incredible. But of course, Pumps

[Angie]

we got. I said all the engaging personality stuff first.

[Jennifer]

I know Pumps. Listen, this is, this just comes from a position of love.

[Angie]

Yeah.

[Jennifer]

I really think you should date.

[Angie]

I really kind of do Hunter Biden's running around Oklahoma City. Come on.

[Jennifer]

Well, I don't know. I just.

[Angie]

I think you should guy at the gym today for the first time who I'm 100 sure is heterosexual.

[Jennifer]

100 which means he's 100 gay. Anytime pump says 100 on something my history that hundred percent dwindles. But maybe he is. But I don't know. I just think. I think you look great. I think you're the happiest I've seen you in forever. And I think you look the best you've looked in a long time. I think you should go and just. I think you should throw yourself out there and date.

[Angie]

I think I should get on and vax.com.

[Jennifer]

yeah, I do because it would be great content for the pod.

[Angie]

Wouldn't that be funny?

[Jennifer]

Kylie.

[Kylie]

Hi.

[Angie]

Hi Kylie. You look so cute with your black and white.

[Kylie]

Thank you. I have to say I've never heard of a dress up lunch. That's probably my least favorite thing I've ever heard. But I think you said you're gonna go but you're not gonna dress up. I actually think that's worse than skipping. Then you just look like an.

[Angie]

Well, I'm just gonna say I didn't have time.

[Jennifer]

You're just come straight from work.

[Angie]

I have to go straight back. Sorry.

[Kylie]

All right. Okay. I've got a review. This one is from Ariana and she says Jen Pumps and crew. As a Canadian who also only has one volume loud. I come for the laughs. But stay because you consistently remind me that there are still Americans who haven't completely lost the plot. Every episode is equal parts group therapy, stand up comedy and public service announcement. In a world where the news cycle feels like the longest running reality shit show ever produced, you somehow managed to make me laugh, think and occasionally yellow. Thank you. Five stars from Canada.

[Jennifer]

That that means a lot because I've been so embarrassed by the way the Trump regime has treated Canada. It's so embarrassing the entitlement and your country just needs to be ours. It's just every stereotype that people that are not from America have about America and Americans all in one fail swoop. They just prove the worst, the worst personality types of all Americans into that one situation. I don't know about you listener, but I'm all about effortless time, effective ways to get ready in the morning. I despise the heavy caked on makeup look but because I'm on camera every day I have to wear some makeup. That's why I am so obsessed with Jones Road Beauty, particularly the Jones Road Beauty Miracle Balm. You can use it as a highlighter, bronzer or lip tint. It's the ultimate no fuss multitasker. And the best thing about Jones Road Beauty cosmetics, you guys, is every formula is packed with skin loving ingredients because clean beauty should just be the baseline standard. They also have a new product that I'm completely obsessed with. It is their foundation stick. If I don't get a lot of sleep one night because I'm reading the news too much and my eyes wake up, I wake up and my eyes are a little dark, I use that foundation stick. Wipes it all away. Listener modern day makeup that's clean, strategic and multifunctional for effortless routines. For a limited time, our listeners are getting a free full sized mascara on their first purchase when they use Code had it at checkout. Just head to Jonesroadbeauty.com and use code had it at checkout. After you purchase, they will ask where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them that our show sent you. All right. It's no secret for our long term listeners on this podcast that Pumps and I are very, very obsessed with our canines. And we want their lives to be just as pampered and fluffy and perfect as possible. That's why we both use Chewy to keep our dogs happy. Chewy has over 100,000 products from all the brands that our pets love at the prices that I love. I'm talking about food, treats, beds, you name it, they have it. And it gets shipped directly to your door in one to two days. And it's not just for dogs and cats, birds, fish, reptiles and more. I am so impressed with Chewy. I have some stuff set on auto ship, my dog's favorite treats, and right as I'm about to run out, here comes my package. And my dogs never go without their special treats. I use Chewy and you should too. For life with pets, there's Chewy. And right now you can save $20 on your first order and get free shipping by going to chupanions.chewy.com I've had it podcast. That's Chupanions chewy.com I've had it Podcast to save $20 on your first order with free shipping. Chupanions.chewy.Com I've had it podcast. Minimum purchase required. New customers only. Terms and conditions apply. C site for complete details. All right, thank you, Kylie. All right, let's move on to some new stories. Right now we have something going viral on Buzzfeed and pop this up. Screenshots of wild things mom posted in online mom groups that make me scared for the next generation. Let's go to the first one. This mom who expected teachers to wipe her child's butt after they use the bathroom. Question. My son's teacher refuses to help him wipe. Is that normal? So my son is 4 and he is in pre K today. When he got home he informed me that his teacher will not help him wipe his butt, which really aggravates me. Yes, he is learning to wipe his butt but he's four so he obviously doesn't always do the best and can't get it all. Thankfully he didn't have any streaks in his underwear or left on his butt today. But if he comes home like that at any time, I feel like I'm going to have to have a discussion with the teacher moms that have kids in pre K. Do your kids teachers wipe help wipe their butt? I feel like it's not normal for pre K teachers to refuse to help 4 year olds wipe their butt. What I'd like to point out here is that this woman sat down at a computer. Type that out and hit send.

[Angie]

She thought she was right. That is crazy. That's crazy. I mean I think my kids, I mean not Emily probably, but the boys probably have skids into, you know, I mean every now and then, not all the time, but I would never, first of all, I wouldn't want somebody wiping my four year old's ass. I mean that's the thing, this is

[Jennifer]

the thing with these parents right now. You bring up such a good point, Pumps. Everybody's so cruel to teachers.

[Angie]

Number one, they don't make it like

[Jennifer]

they teach, they treat them like. And it's not a very valued profession but in this instance she's mad because the teacher isn't wiping the ass. In another instance another parent's going to be like this teacher got a wipe and wiped my child's butt. And I think they're a pedophile. I mean that's just kind of like teachers are damned if they do, damned if they in the Republican party MAGA has they have a full blown assault on teachers right now. But you bring up such an excellent point about that.

[Angie]

Here's the thing too. Like they should wipe their own ass. If they have skits long enough they'll get their ass cleaner. That's just that if, if a teacher's wiping a butt they put like what, 30 pre kindergartners in a public school class. Now all she's doing all day long is wiping asses. This woman. No, no, no, no, no.

[Jennifer]

Let's go on to the next one. This mom who wanted her child's name to be a tribute to her marriage. I'm almost seven months pregnant with our first child, a little girl. I've been fighting with my husband because he doesn't like the name I've picked out. I want to name her tenderly. T I N D E R L E I G H because we met on Tinder a little over a year ago. The site helped me find my true love and I think the name is perfect. My husband thinks it's embarrassing and doesn't want people to know we met there. How can I convince him how special this name is to me? Plus I'm a little hurt that he's embarrassed by the way we came together in this world. And then a bunch of emojis to follow. So again I want to point out for the permanent record that somebody committed homicide, suicide of their dignity. She sat down at a computer, opened this up, typed it out and didn't hit backspace and go. I'm having a crazy moment. This is unhinged. The last thing I'm going to do is post this on the Internet. I'm with her up until that point. I've had crazy thoughts. I've been unhinged. She hit send, she hit publish. She deliciously signed it with emojis.

[Angie]

That's what the tenderly. I mean first of all if you want to name your kid tenderly, go ahead. Being heard that your husband's embarrassed you met on Tinder, like get over it. Who cares?

[Jennifer]

I mean I think naming your kid tenderly is dumb. I think kids names are getting increasingly dumb. I think the cute spellings are child abuse. I think if they name this child tenderly, it's layers of abuse. I think it's layers of abuse. It's just like you're branding your child with your dating. These are the people. This gal that wants to name her daughter tenderly. This is the woman that will have a full blown conversation with her husband in the comment section so that everybody else can see it. All of this lives together. There were multiple gender reveals parties and I'm 100 certain they're MAGA. 100. I do not believe any self respecting progressive would name their child T I n D E R L E I G H tenderly.

[Angie]

There's some bad names out there. I mean there are some bad names out there. I agree with you. Why are we, why are we making so many consonants and vowels and in something that's unnecessary.

[Jennifer]

But the kids names are getting crazy.

[Angie]

They're getting fucking crazy.

[Jennifer]

They're crazy.

[Angie]

In fact, I was just. I had heard a name the other day and I was just like. That used to just be a normal name. I will tell you this though. I've had slight buyers remorse about how boring my kids names are. They're just boring. Sam, Emily Loop.

[Jennifer]

But it's much better. They're.

[Angie]

No, no, no. I know, but. So this makes me happy. But I'm just like, I could have been a little more creative. I could have, but I didn't. That's a miss. But you know, they're fine. It's not like Angie's a 10 out of 10.

[Jennifer]

When did you start having the buyer's remorse about night with your kids?

[Angie]

Like a week ago, randomly. I was. Somebody was talking about Emily, had a friend and her name was Harper. And I just thought that's so cute.

[Jennifer]

That's cute. Yeah, that's a cute.

[Angie]

Really cute. I just didn't dig deep at all. Just Emily. Okay. And I picked them all. So it's not. I can't blame anyone but myself.

[Jennifer]

All right, moving along. This mom who unschooled her child and deeply regretted it. Has anyone unschooled a child who organically learned to read write on their own? Like a child who naturally teaches themselves how to stand and walk? And at what age did this happen, please? My child is 8.5. And I recently went to a homeschool event where a reading tutor expressed her disappointment that I missed the window. And now my child will struggle. I was under the impression that my child would naturally learn as her desire grew, as with all things in this human life, but would love some anecdotes to support us in this unschooled journey. Thanks. Thank you. Heart kiss emoji situation again.

[Angie]

No confused about that. What is all that?

[Jennifer]

Stupidity. These are just idiots that think that teachers have an agenda against their kids and that the deep state has some agenda against their kids. That want their kids to learn that dinosaurs and human beings lived on the plane at the same time. I perfectly. I understand exactly why this gal posted this on the Internet.

[Angie]

Determine.

[Jennifer]

I get it. Huh?

[Angie]

Unschooled. Is that a thing?

[Kylie]

This is the definition. It's child led learning. There are no mandatory lesson plans, textbooks or standardized tests. The children decide what, when and how

[Jennifer]

brilliant they want to learn.

[Angie]

Perfect.

[Jennifer]

Kids are just notorious decision makers. I mean, when I need a decision made, I think let's have a child make that decision. They're so decisive. They make their decision and they really just stay in it. There's never regret. There's. What an idiot. Okay, the next one. This mom who tried to get their toddler to go to the gym. Hello, beautiful people. My son is only 27 months, but he's pretty advanced for his age physically and intellectually. I really want to get him started with healthy routines such as working out, eating right, etc. Are there any gym classes for kids in his age group that are actual gym classes and not just running around and playing? We tried the little gym, which was fun, but it wasn't exactly focused physically. Fitness. Thank you, exclamation point. No. For a 27 month old, you don't have fucking step aerobics. They're not going to Pilates. Like, have you ever been around a 27 month old? Like that's what they do. They run around and play and that is exercise. She wants her kid doing burpees or something, right?

[Angie]

She's. We're gonna hold a plank for two minutes. Let's everybody stop. Let's go again. That's one word. Stupid. These people are just. This is fantastic. I'm enjoying this so, so much.

[Jennifer]

Okay, the next one is this mom who felt very strongly about not washing her baby with soap. Oh, my God. I would also rather let my baby eat dog food off the floor, which he's done a few times, than use soap on him. There is just no need for it unless there is a true need for it. All this, my son is nearly two years. Never soap or lotion. Lots of dog licks and food though. And then somebody responds again. I mean, right? I spray breast milk on everything. Hair cuts, the dog face. I healed my dog's eyeball cancer with my breast milk. That never happened. Listener. Just FYI, this person is a liar and a freak. They wanted to cut it out. I said no. And I sprayed it for weeks. Totally healed it. I have pics. The old breast milk for healing dog eye cancer.

[Angie]

What do you bet they're not vaxxers? You want to put money on that?

[Jennifer]

100 million percent. These are the people that are like absolutely, positively not vaxed at all in the least. I spray. I spray. What are they doing? Do they get like the breast milk? They pump it and they put it in like a water bottle with a sprayer. Could you imagine how sour the you thought that they. Wait, you think they're like just sprinkling the breast around the house? I mean, that's what I.

[Angie]

That was my first thought is they're

[Jennifer]

just like grabbing a nipple.

[Angie]

Grabbing a nipple and just honking it. And there you go.

[Jennifer]

Can you imagine the smell? Oh, the sour, rotten milk smell of all of this?

[Angie]

No, no, no, I can't because you know how like kids get it in their little cracks and like, you know, just. No, I can't imagine. But here's the deal. My guess is she's not a big clean. Like, she's not a huge soaper. So she probably.

[Jennifer]

Well, she's not a sober shell.

[Angie]

Right.

[Jennifer]

I think she's anti soap.

[Angie]

Of all the things to be anti about.

[Jennifer]

And here's the thing. Swap out the cleaning, disinfecting nature of soap with the rotting, mildewing, curdling nature of milk. Really shows the stupidity that's running amok on the Internet.

[Angie]

I mean, really, if you met this woman, she's like, please come for a play date.

[Jennifer]

And you get over milk.

[Angie]

Yeah. You're like, oh, I have a, you know, I have a hangnail. Oh, here you go. Get that cleared right up. I mean, these.

[Jennifer]

I've strapped throat.

[Angie]

Open your mouth.

[Jennifer]

I can hear it.

[Angie]

Oh, God. People are stupid.

[Jennifer]

That's a pretty good. I healed my dogs. I can't eyeball with eyeball cancer with my breast milk. That's nuts. Okay, she probably. This is. You know what her Facebook page says. I can tell you right now, Dr. Fauci needs to be in prison.

[Angie]

That's what it says.

[Jennifer]

That's her profile photo. That are the fight, fight, fight, the butler assassination. And then the. The like. What is it called, Kylie? The banner at the top. The banner at the top. It's probably like Dr. Fauci is Chinese spy that invented coverage, invented covet and spread it to everybody. And I'm unvaxed.

[Angie]

But I bet her restaurant could have cured it.

[Jennifer]

She probably never had coveted because of all the breast milk she sprays on everything.

[Angie]

Probably.

[Jennifer]

Okay, here's the next one. This mom who was looking for a school but didn't want to call it that stupid question. Is there like homeschool learning centers or groups that do it? Mostly with homeschooling where I don't have to do much. I work 7:30 to 4 and then he has sports after. So not shift. Sure how this would work in my schedule. I am hybrid two days a week. I don't even know if I'm asking the right question.

[Angie]

This guy's looking for a babysitter.

[Jennifer]

Why don't you.

[Angie]

She's.

[Jennifer]

Why is it she's signing up for school?

[Angie]

Yeah, that's 7:30 to 4 already there at school for activities. Perfect.

[Jennifer]

I mean, why did. Why are these people so anti school and anti soap?

[Angie]

Well, because they're indoctrinating children with the woke mind virus.

[Jennifer]

It's true. They are. Okay, and here's the last one. This mom who asked for tips on how to carry her child and a firearm at the same time. I just ordered a tush baby. Anyone have a tish baby and carries gun? How are y' all doing it? And then the top contributor responds, is this a serious question? I'm gonna go ahead and say maybe don't carry both your baby and a firearm on your hip. Here's what I have to say. Look it. Put the baby on your hip, holster up with a firearm, and then have your, you know, lactating breast locked and loaded with one of those bras where you can just open it and if anybody coughs or has a runny nose or any sort of ailment, you know, you can just do this. And if you see somebody robbing a bank, that's sick. Like, say it's a price sick. But they're also committing a crime. You could both cure the illness by spraying with your tit and also kill them at the same time. More America than all of this. And you know what? You know what I think? I think these people love America.

[Angie]

They're true Americans.

[Jennifer]

I think they love it. When I. When I read all of this, I think these people love their country.

[Kylie]

These.

[Jennifer]

These people are not libtards that hate their country.

[Angie]

They're not libtards. The.

[Ad Voice]

The.

[Angie]

The.

[Jennifer]

These people are America's best foot forward. That's what. And I also think I'm so glad these people are breeding.

[Angie]

That's what I thought we need. They need to have like 10 kids a piece. For sure.

[Jennifer]

For sure. I mean, why stop here? Especially with the. The breast milk killing cancer. I mean, she has a really lucrative business ahead of her.

[Angie]

Right.

[Jennifer]

She just, you know, she can take that on the road.

[Kylie]

Yeah.

[Jennifer]

I recently ordered a new swivel chair. I love a swivel chair. I think they're great in living rooms because somebody can kind of spin around and talk to this group if somebody's in the kitchen. Spin around and talk to that group if somebody's in the living room. And I have to tell you, article delivered for me. I ordered the Julie swivel chair in ivory boucle. The quality, incredible delivery, flawless customer service, impeccable listener article has curated collections for every style they have quality without compromise. Consistently delivering high quality furniture that is fast, affordable with great shipping and assembly available to you. And there's also support when you need it. And get this there is a 30 day satisfaction guarantee. Listener Article is offering our listeners $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. To claim, visit article.com had it and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout. That's article.com had it for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more life insurance. We all know we need it, but we keep putting it off because we think it's complicated or expensive or that we'll live forever. Stop telling yourself you'll handle it later and take care of it today with Select Quote listener in just 15 minutes you could have coverage that fits your life and your budget. Here's what makes Select Quote different Their licensed insurance agents work for you, not for one insurance company. They compare options across multiple carriers to find the right coverage at the lowest price. If you're healthy, they can get you same day coverage with no medical exam. Other brokers push policies that pay them the most. Select Quotes Agents actually shop for you. Select Quote they shop and you save. Get the right life insurance for you for [e-mail] had it go to SelectQuote.com had it today to get started. This episode is brought to you by IQ Bar, our exclusive snack, hydration and coffee sponsor. IQ Bar Protein Bars, IQ Mix Hydration Mixes and IQ Joe Mushroom Coffees are the delicious, low sugar brain and body fuel you need to win your day. I'll tell you what we did Listener at this here studio. We ordered the Ultimate Sampler Pack and it is a great way to try all of the things that I just mentioned. Kylie, our producer obsessed with the IQ Joe Mushroom Coffees midday, she's always hitting one of those. I love the hydration sticks. They keep me so incredibly hydrated. Listener with over 20,000 5 star reviews and counting, more people than ever are fueling their busy lifestyles with IQ Bars, Brain and Body Boosting Bars, Hydration Mixes and Mushroom Coffees. Their Ultimate Sampler Pack includes all three. We use all of these IQ Bar products here at our IHIP studios and you should too. And right now IQ Bar is offering our special podcast listeners 20% off all IQ bar products including the ultimate sampler pack plus free shipping to get your 20 off. Text had it to 64,000 text had it to 64,000. That's had it to 64,000. Message and data rates may apply. See terms for details.

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tell me a story?

[Angie]

Sure. Once upon a time, a mom needed a new car. Was she brave? She was tired mostly.

[Jennifer]

But she went to Carvana.com and found

[Angie]

a great car at a great price. No secret treasure map required. Did you have to fight a dragon?

[Kylie]

Nope.

[Angie]

She bought it 100% online from her bed, actually. Was it scary?

[Jennifer]

Honey, it was as unscary as car buying could be. Did the car have a sunroof? It did actually. Okay, good story. Car buying you'll want to tell stories about.

[Angie]

Buy your car today on delivery fees may apply.

[Jennifer]

All right, here we have another story here. Let's pop up this headline. In a protein maxing era, men want tight suits. Forget the muscle tank. This is muscle tailoring. All right, here's more from this article. Here's an excerpt. We're in a particularly body conscious moment with 70% of Americans trying to consume muscle building protein in 2025, up from 59% in 2022, according to a survey by the International Food Information Council. Extreme workouts like hyrox have taken off and testosterone and GLP1 injections are on the rise, promising muscle gains and weight loss. Against that backdrop, more suits that cling to every ounce of hard won flesh have appeared not only on public figures, but also on some European runways like Pradas. And so you know, this is like I, I totally see this happening. We've been covering protein and bro wipes and men are really into their bodies And I mean, whatever. I mean, it's fine. I don't have a problem with this because I'm in the 80s. Do you remember the men wore, like, short shorts and tank tops?

[Angie]

Yeah.

[Jennifer]

I mean, now it would be considered kind of like. Or g. It was hot.

[Ad Voice]

I like it.

[Angie]

Okay.

[Jennifer]

And so some fascists haven't caught on to this trend. They're not understanding a tailored suit. So let's pop up this tweet. Here we have Stephen Miller in a suit with commentary from menswear expert Derek Guy. So Derek Guy says, Steven's mill. Stephen Miller's suit here shows one of the biggest problems with men's tailoring today. And here is a picture of Stephen Miller in a very, very untailored suit. And he says, in fact, when you look at photos from that event, you'll find that Miller's silhouette is the limpest and saddest. The shoulder line is completely unpadded, so it follows the shape of his natural shoulders, which is curved like a rainbow. Derek Guy, this is a plus. No notes.

[Angie]

That's awesome.

[Jennifer]

And then he goes on to pop up this of Stephen Miller. And he says, and it's a picture of Stephen Miller with his wife Katie on the beach next to a photograph of an aardvark or anteater. And he says, this is especially true if a man is built like a threatened anteater. Miller has narrated his relatively narrow shoulders with wide hips, which means there's not much shape through the torso, which is why he's not tailoring. If we look at this outfit right here, a lot of you have heard me kind of go off on our other podcast, I Hip News, where I talk about the pink arm and white men have pink arms. And I would just. Kylie, if you could zoom in on the arm. This is exactly what a pink arm is. A lot of people say, what's a pink arm? This is a pink arm. This is an arm with absolutely zero muscle tone. Zero. And you can tell by its coloring it's pink in nature. This is the worst white men's foot forward. Right here is this arm. There's the pink arm. And you even see how pink is his hand is.

[Angie]

It is really.

[Jennifer]

And then you can also. And here's the thing. Stephen Miller, you know, is a dick. And so we're going to completely critique his appearance. He gets on Fox, I believe, and flirts relentlessly with Jesse Waters, the weirdest gay going on between Jesse Waters and Stephen Miller. But look at that little pot belly inner tube right there.

[Angie]

Yeah, I didn't realize he had such a dad, like Puff or whatever. Here's the deal. He is very slight. I mean, I know AOC said he was 410, but I've never seen a full body next to another. He's very slight. I. That explains so much to me.

[Jennifer]

And the slide doesn't really bother me so much, just that he thinks his doesn't stink. And he never. He's a bad dresser. He has chronic pink arm. He's just. I mean, he does look like a threatened anteater. I think that's absolutely perfect.

[Angie]

He is an anteater. He's a dick. I hate him so much. Wait for him to go to jail.

[Kylie]

His. He has made it so that when you Google his height, it tells you he is 5:10.

[Jennifer]

That is a lie.

[Angie]

That's a lie.

[Jennifer]

That is a lie.

[Kylie]

Yep.

[Jennifer]

Are there photographs? Stephen Miller with others. Can we do some investigating?

[Ad Voice]

Right.

[Kylie]

Yeah. How about him? Next to Kushner?

[Jennifer]

Yeah, next to Kushner or Trump? Because we know Trump says he's 6 3, but he's about 5 10.

[Angie]

But he does wear lifts, so he might.

[Jennifer]

He's shorter. Is he shorter than Trump? He is Howard Lutnick.

[Angie]

Can we get a picture of Howard Lutnick and Stephen Miller?

[Jennifer]

Have they ever been side by side?

[Kylie]

Okay, I'm gonna pull up a couple of these. Okay. Here's him next to Jared Kushner.

[Jennifer]

Oh, not on his shoulder.

[Angie]

Peter Navarro and Steve Bannon. He's Steve.

[Jennifer]

He's the shortest of them all.

[Kylie]

And then here he is next to Trump. And I think that he might be on a platform in this photo behind Mr. Box, behind a podium, and he's still much shorter.

[Jennifer]

Yeah. Would you look up the height of Steve Bannon?

[Kylie]

Yeah. It says he is 6 foot Steve Bannon.

[Jennifer]

So go back to that other photo. I would think, like, 510.

[Angie]

510 is what I was gonna say.

[Jennifer]

Okay, so let's do an estimate of Stephen Miller in that photo where they're all in the oval. Kylie. Okay, so, boom. I think we are looking at about five, seven.

[Angie]

I was gonna say five seven.

[Kylie]

God.

[Angie]

I'd really. If we could find it somewhere on the Internet of him and Howard Lut neck next to each other. That would be the coup de gras for me.

[Kylie]

It says Jared Kushner, 6:3.

[Jennifer]

I think that's probably right.

[Kylie]

Yeah.

[Jennifer]

I think he is tall. All right, let's do one voice memo.

[Kylie]

Okay. Up first, we've got Nick.

[Ad Voice]

So I've got a big. I've had it. And I rant about this weekly but my husband who coaches youth sports just kind of doesn't care. So anyways my I've had it is sports mom but specifically like the baseball moms, they're making me absolutely banana pants. My algorithm has gotten jacked up I guess because I'm a mom and I like sports. And so I got on this like baseball mom algorithm thing where they're basically like oh yeah, I haven't had a new bra since 2019 but little Johnny's hitting dingers with a $400 bat or I can't afford a three thousand dollar bag so I just borrow my, my child and they turn around and it's like their son's bat bag or whatever. And like you know, from a cultural perspective the overarching theme. I'm so freaking sick and tired of an expectation being set that women should basically have to sacrifice themselves at the altar of motherhood. Like I'm not going to bankrupt myself for an 8 year old to play travel ball. It's absolutely absurd. But secondly, like statistically speaking most of these kids are not going to play in pros. They're not even going to play in college. It is way more likely that in three years they're going to be burnt out on this sport and not even playing. And all Kaylee's to going to have to show for all of her efforts is you know, an empty 401k, a drinking problem from all the mom juice coming out of her, you know, customized baseball mom Stanley cup and a bunch of videos of her acting like a complete insane person screaming at an umpire over an 8 year old's baseball game. I've just had it. Sick of it. I'm done.

[Angie]

That's a good, such a good. I had not thought about that, you know, sacrificing everything at the altar of mom. That's a great point. I love that I told you that Luke was, he was a umpire for little league baseball or T ball. He got mother so hard and it was five year old, four year old and five year old T ball. He would not go back the next year he goes mama, I don't want to go back.

[Jennifer]

By the parents, by the parents.

[Angie]

They would like fall in like blue you blue. Open your eyes off. I mean he was just, and he was like I had to drive him out there and drop him off at first. So it was the. So he, he's like 15 and they're on a T ball and they are just cussing. And so the next year I was like. Because it was great money. It was like 20 bucks a game. And he was like, I don't, I don't want to go back. I was like, that's sad. That is sad, sad, sad.

[Jennifer]

Yeah. And this, the kids sports thing has turned into a big exploitation. It's a consumer racket. The corporations have figured out that parents will spend thousands of dollars and so they form all of these groups, these, that you have your school sports and then they've, you know, have all the merch and all this stuff for that. But then they've formed subsequent organizations and subsequent clubs you have to sign up for and then subsequent equipment you have to have. And it is insane. And again, like everything in America, the, you know, wealthy are able to access these things. And it's just, it's really, it the, the pressure being put on parents to parent right now and keeping up with the jones, I think exacerbated by the Internet and performative parenting going on and the expectation put on kids. Yeah, it's too much. It's just too much. And I agree with the caller that 99.9999-999999-99999% of these kids are just going to school to play sports for fun. We don't need to, we don't need to spend thousands of dollars. We don't need to have all of these private coaches, but go and have fun. And so, so many times I think it's just, it's not fun. And the parents are lunatics. I mean, they're absolute lunatics about it.

[Angie]

Did I just saw. I was reading an article that private equity is now buying travel, youth teams

[Jennifer]

and travel, you know, so everybody.

[Angie]

Yeah, so that's. I, when I read that, I was

[Jennifer]

like, wow, wow, wow, wow. They're buying up all the homes. That's why millennials can't buy homes. It's just, something's got to happen. The, the unrestricted capitalism is just really. It's causing so many problems. You have this fleet of people that all they see is just exploiting. They're like these mothers that are on there, these nuts. Everybody is just got some angle about something. It's just like, just be a mom. You get up the majority of the days. It's boring. It's a boring thing. And you have to learn to accept that and embrace that and send your kids to school. Send them to school. The teachers are not drag queens. And you should be so lucky if they are.

[Angie]

Yeah, really, really.

[Jennifer]

It'd be the best thing for you and your kids to be taught by a drag queen, because drag queens are sharp as tags. All right, that's all we have. Please pre order my book. Not today, Fascists. The lies that got us here and the truth that will reunite us. The link is right below. And we will see you guys soon. I'll tell you what I've had it with. Let's hear it. I've had it with that.

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