Survey Says: Go to Hell

Summary

"Survey Says: Go to Hell" — Podcast Summary

Podcast: I’ve Had It
Hosts: Jennifer Welch (Jen) & Angie Sullivan (Pumps)
Episode Date: February 24, 2026
Special Guests/Contributors: Kylie (producer/assistant), Listeners Laura, Lauren, and D

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Episode Overview

This episode of I’ve Had It dives into daily annoyances, political hypocrisy, religious grift, and the proliferation of “survey abuse,” with hosts Jen and Pumps mixing sharp humor and candid social critique. Listener voice memos add personal stories about everything from post-police stop survey requests to encountering MAGA merch families at Disney World, while the hosts unpack the deeper social issues at play, all with their trademark irreverence.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Everyday Narcissism and Social Encounters

Segment: [00:53 - 04:38]

• Jen recounts an encounter with a near-stranger obsessing over a year-old wedding dress—an example of "daily narcissism."
• Quote, Jen ([01:08]): “Why do people think that other people are thinking about them all the time? It’s fat—fascinating.”
• Pumps praises Jen's quick exit strategy: “That’s growth. See, that’s the kind of energy I need for you to have when we go out together on an Irish exit.” ([04:19])
• Both agree these awkward, self-absorbed interactions are shockingly common—and relatable.

2. Media, Political Critique & Fox News “Hit Piece”

Segment: [04:54 - 07:33]

• Jen reads from a Fox News Digital article quoting her past insults of right-wing figures.
• She owns and doubles down on every quote, embracing her profane critique of MAGA and conservative media personalities.
• Quote, Jen ([06:16]): “I triple, quadruple, infinitely double down. I thought that was beautiful journalism.”
• Discussion of Charlie Kirk’s gun comments—how repeating extremists’ words back to them causes more offense than their actual positions.

3. The Republican Rebrand & Hypocritical “Comebacks”

Segment: [07:35 - 11:20]

• Kylie shares a five-star review from a listener “blue dot in a red state.”
• The hosts roast the idea of establishment Republicans like Nikki Haley and Marco Rubio rebranding as moderates post-Trump.
• Quote, Pumps ([08:44]): “It is going to be the most nauseating, hypocritical rebrand bullshit seance with a Ouija board.”
• Prediction that Trump loyalists will rewrite their own history, denying support much like Germans post-WWII.
• Quote, Jen ([10:54]): “In 10 years, you’re not going to be able to find more than like, a million people out of the 77 million that will admit it.”

4. Therapy, Propaganda, & Personal Accountability

Segment: [11:20 - 12:35]

• Pumps and Jen agree: anyone experiencing “Trump regret” after January 6 needs therapy—and accountability can’t be dodged.
• Quote, Pumps ([11:52]): “You fell for propaganda. You’re not a critical thinker, and you got duped. … You need to go to therapy like everyone else.”

5. Listener Laura’s “Survey Abuse” Rant

Segment: [15:03 - 16:39]

• Laura laments a post–traffic-stop police survey request, mocking the absurdity of policing by five-star review.
• Quote, Laura ([15:22]): “That’s the problem with the American policing system right now is that we don’t have enough five star reviews? Y’all know George Floyd didn’t die that long ago, right?”
• The hosts agree, sharing similar “survey abuse” stories, from OB-GYN visits to in-person AT&T service reviews.
• Quote, Pumps ([16:39]): “I got a survey from a pap smear. … It felt like I was in a car wash and somebody rolled down the window, then stuck my tit in it.”

6. Surveys, Grifting, and Authoritarian Religion

Segment: [18:43 - 21:17]

• Jen notes political surveys from the Trump camp require donations to make your answer “count.”
• Pumps draws a parallel with authoritarian religious tithing: “The tithing aspects of it were so gross. … It is a scam business.” ([20:01])
• Both argue megachurch culture primed the MAGA base for political fleecing.

7. Megachurches, Evangelical Culture, & Performative Christianity

Segment: [22:18 - 31:27]

• Discussion of the “megachurch boom” of the 1980s fueling today’s evangelical MAGA base.
• Critique of Life Church and Crossings Church for profit-driven expansion, performative services, and their divisive role in Christian culture.
• Quote, Pumps ([26:24]): “The evangelicals are the trashiest branch of Christianity imaginable.”
• Kylie describes a pastor’s transformation, from modest to megachurch-wealthy. Jen and Pumps joke this coincides with having an affair—a common sign, in their view, of midlife “growth” in evangelical pastors.

8. Listener Lauren: MAGA Families at Disney World

Segment: [24:54 - 29:19]

• Lauren describes seeing a family in matching Charlie Kirk merch, expressing frustration at right-wing presence at family-friendly spaces.
• Quote, Lauren ([25:26]): “I need Disney, all the theme parks, I need them to do something about this. It is an eyesore every time we go to the parks.”
• The hosts discuss the attempted posthumous “rebrand” and televised funeral of Charlie Kirk, which they call a “cult” spectacle that backfired.

9. Listener D: “Pick Me” Racists & Social Media

Segment: [31:42 - 33:00]

• D rails against “pick me racists,” using social media clout to flaunt their bigotry.
• Quote, D ([32:03]): “It’s like, girl, what, you want a fucking cookie because you’re a racist?”
• Pumps and Jen empathize, calling for the return of Cancel Culture and hope for a future where racist behavior is once again shunned and traced online for posterity.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Republican rebranding:
  Pumps ([08:44]): “It is going to be the most nauseating, hypocritical rebrand bullshit seance with a Ouija board.”
• On tithing and religious grift:
  Pumps ([20:01]): “…If your church’s goal is to expand and open up more churches, it’s not a church, it’s a business. And you’re getting scammed.”
• On posthumous MAGA spectacle:
  Pumps ([26:24]): “They went so hard with this nationally televised megachurch WWE weird patriotic Nazi style funeral.”
• On “pick me” racism:
  D ([32:03]): “What, you want a racist cookie? Because we don’t.”

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Key Timestamps

| Time | Segment / Highlight | |----------|-----------------------------------------------------| | 00:53 | Narcissistic wedding dress encounter | | 04:54 | Fox News hit piece reading and media drag | | 07:35 | Establishment GOP fake resurrection discussion | | 11:20 | Therapy needed for “Trump regret” voters | | 15:03 | Listener Laura: Police survey and “survey abuse” | | 16:39 | Pap smear and mammogram survey stories | | 18:43 | Political surveys as grift, Trump campaign tactics | | 20:01 | Tithing and megachurches as early indoctrination | | 22:18 | Megachurch boom and evangelical culture critique | | 24:54 | Listener Lauren: MAGA merch at Disney World | | 26:24 | Charlie Kirk's funeral and MAGA cult performance | | 31:42 | Listener D: Instagram “pick me racists” | | 33:52 | Hope for return of Cancel Culture |

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Tone & Style

• Irreverent, sharp, and unapologetically political
• Candid storytelling, plenty of profanity and biting analogies
• Heavy on personal anecdotes and listener interaction
• Aims to blend humor with serious critique of social, political, and religious trends

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Closing Remarks

Jen and Pumps end by urging listeners to submit voice memos via Instagram and plug their new quick-take political show, "IHP News," “always served with a side of petty grievances.” The closing is, as ever, comedic: “What does an eagle say? Caca.”

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Useful for new and returning listeners, this summary captures a high-energy episode blending relatable gripes, meme-worthy quotes, and trenchant social commentary—true to the “I’ve Had It” brand.

Transcript

[Narrator]

ABC Wednesday in comedian Nate Brigetzi's new game show. To win, you don't need to know the right answer, just what most Americans think is right. It's not about being the smartest. You just have to be the most average. We asked 100 average Americans, do they keep an empty gas can in their car?

[Listener Laura]

No.

[Narrator]

Have they ever broken a bone?

[Kylie]

No.

[Advertiser]

I said a lot of no.

[Listener D]

That's all right.

[Narrator]

My wife says a lot of no as well. The greatest Average American premieres Wednesday, 9.8Central on ABC and stream next day on Hulu.

[Listener D]

Support is available 24. 7 with VRBoCare. We're here day or night, ready whenever you need help because a great trip starts with the right support.

[Advertiser]

So are we supposed to start the podcast?

[Pumps]

Ready?

[Jen]

1, 2, 3.

[Pumps]

Patriots, gay trots, they triots, black triots, brown triots. And all of the triple trumpers and just pedophile protectors can do what Pumps. Fuck off. Welcome to I've had it pumps. What have you had it with?

[Jen]

What I've had it with is people's narcissism. This happened. This is a true story. So I run into a girl at a restaurant that I guess I had been at the same wedding at. I don't remember, but I guess I had seen her there. And she comes up to me and she starts talking about, did I. What did I think of the dress that she had on at that wedding? It was, like, almost a year ago. Number one, I don't remember seeing her. Number two, I don't remember what I wore to that wedding. Why the fuck would I remember what she wore to the wedding? And she just kept, like, describing it and insisting it on talking about what she wore and what I thought of it. And I just thought, I can't. I have to go. I. I cannot sit here and entertain a conversation about what you wore. I didn't even remember seeing the person at the wedding, much less what she wore. It's unbelievable. Just the daily narcissism that you see. I mean, you see it in the administration, but just normal people. It's narcissism. It's just off the chain.

[Pumps]

Let me ask you this, okay? How long did you stand and talk to her about the dress?

[Jen]

Well, I immediately go, I'm so sorry. I. I just don't remember. So then she starts describing it, and

[Pumps]

I was like, hang on, I want a little context here. So she comes up to you, hi, I haven't seen you since the wedding. And you're like, oh, yeah, hi. Nice to see you. And Then she says, I didn't.

[Jen]

I didn't remember seeing her at the wedding.

[Pumps]

What do you think about my dress?

[Jen]

No. Then she said, you know, the dress that I wore to that wedding, I think that you would look really good in that. I was just like, what are you talking.

[Pumps]

She was trying to sell it to you.

[Jen]

I didn't think that, but maybe she was. I just think she wanted to talk about. Here's what I think. I think she looked in the mirror before she went to that wedding and was like, you're killing it. You are a plus. Nobody looks better than you. And then got to the wedding and she didn't get what she wanted. Clearly, she didn't get it from me because nine months later, she wants to get it for me. But I was just like, first of all, I don't know what you wore. I don't remember seeing you. Why do people think that other people are thinking about them all the time? It. It's fat. Fascinating.

[Pumps]

Was this the wedding we went to together in Arkansas?

[Jen]

No, no. It was a different wedding this May. And I was. Seriously, I didn't remember her name. I didn't remember I'd seen her at the wedding.

[Pumps]

I certainly didn't remember know this person.

[Jen]

Apparently I do, but I don't know how because I texted my friend and I was like, who is this person? And then she. She, like, led me through because I thought it was another person. You know, I don't pay attention. So it was a different person. But I just walked away from that conversation. And I would say the whole thing, the whole interaction lasted less than one minute because I immediately, I'm like, oh, my gosh, I have to go to the bathroom.

[Pumps]

That's growth. That is growth. See, that's the kind of energy I need for you to have when we

[Jen]

go out together on an Irish exit.

[Pumps]

Yeah, yeah, That's. That's. That's growth that you were able to. Oh, my God, I need to go to the bathroom and get away from that. That's weird. People are weird.

[Jen]

It was so weird.

[Pumps]

So it's just. That's a really weird conversation. And the sad thing is, even though it was only a minute, you'll never get that minute back.

[Kylie]

No.

[Pumps]

And even sadder, all of our listeners are never going to get these three minutes talking about it back.

[Jen]

No. I've taken everybody down.

[Pumps]

Everybody's going down with this dress.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Pumps]

But no, I think it's a very relatable story where people. You found yourself in a situation where somebody is talking about something that's uber important to them. And you have no idea what they're talking about or no idea who the person is. Oh, I want to. Fox did a digital feature of me. This is a paragraph that is hilarious that I want to read to you guys. Okay, so this is a paragraph from the Fox News Digital hit piece on me, which I thought this was beautiful journalism. Welch has claimed Charlie Kirk, quote, justified his own assassination with staunch support for the Second Amendment, accused his widow, Erica Kirk of being a, quote, opportunistic grifter, referred to white Americans as crusty white people, said Trump supporters shouldn't be allowed to eat in Mexican restaurants, referred to White House senior adviser Stephen Miller as a Nazi Jew, and called Trump a teeny weeny mushroom cock piece of shit, among many other profane insults. And what I have to say to this is I triple, quadruple, infinitely double down. I thought that was beautiful journalism. Yeah. Coming out of Fox News Digital to quote me so beautifully and to think that, like, those are all insults to me that, like, oh my God, can you believe she said that? It, like my message is resonating.

[Jen]

It is.

[Pumps]

And pumps it really overarchs with your message of teeny weeny. Because that made it in there. And I do, I do think Charlie Kirk, he, he justified his own death, as sad as it is. He did. He, he fought for second amendment right and said we have to have arbitrary killings in order for people to have guns. Interestingly about Charlie Kirk, the co founder of Turning Point, his, his benefactor, financial benefactor, died of COVID So two of the things that Turning Point really advocated for, guns, everybody needs guns. Nobody get a vaccine. Nobody wear a mask. Killed them. They were killed by what they advocated for.

[Jen]

You know what's interesting to me is Charlie Kirk said that on his podcast about guns. People are going to have to die, but it's worth it as long as we get to keep our guns. And the second minute, I mean, he said it, but when you repeat it back to people, that's when they're offended. I mean, when you put the mirror up to those views, they're fine with him saying it. They're all fucking in. But when you say this is what he said, when you quote it, that's when they get mad. It's like the whole mirror situation.

[Pumps]

All right, Kylie, what do you have for us today?

[Kylie]

I've got a couple reviews for you. We'll start with a five star titled My Favorite Baddies. And Natalia writes, I'm a blue dot in a red state run by Mr. Kitten Heels. And this podcast continues to give me life. We need more baddies standing up against fascist MAGA freaks and the misinformation they spread.

[Jen]

Love it, love it, love it.

[Pumps]

Baddies.

[Jen]

You know, kitten heels just kind of fell off the national radar. I mean, he thought he was going to beat 2024's big splash. He just wore those kitten heels out

[Pumps]

and just went, I have a theory on this. I think establishment Republicans that are, are going to plot a comeback after maga. And so they've just played dead during all of this. And then they're going to come out and they're going to be like, we've got to bring back the party of Reagan. We've got to bring back decorum. And it's, Nikki Haley's going to do it. Kitten Hitler is going to do it. Marco Rubio is going to have the biggest, most diabolical rebrand imaginable. He's going to say, I always knew Trump was Hitler, but I agreed to be Secretary of State to put up a guardrail. It is going to be the most nauseating, hypocritical rebrand bullshit seance with a Ouija board. Resurrecting Reagan and all this decorum, it is going to be the worst shit we've ever seen. And we will cover it voraciously on IHP News.

[Jen]

Yeah, and I just read an article about Nikki Haley that she said, you know, we've got to talk about affordability. The White House isn't talking about affordability and doing all this. And I just thought, here she is, she's coming back. Here she comes.

[Pumps]

Well, and here's the thing. Like, the Democrats need to immediately have a response, a rapid response group to that and go, Nikki Haley channels Zoran Mamdani. Nikki Haley supports Zoran Mamdani immediately. Do not let them take what Zorin did. And on the, on the shoulders of Bernie Sanders, I mean, to give credit where credit is due. And now they're racing in as fake populists. And, and the Democrats need to appropriately, appropriately, appropriately identify the lie that so many racist Republicans believe so that they can vote for racist shit. That Republicans are good with the economy. We just vote for business. For fiscal, fiscal conservatives. We're all about fiscal conservatism, you know, because Republicans are. We just vote. You know, my, my husband's in business. He's an entrepreneur. Shut the up. Your husband's a racist pink arm piece of. And you know it. And you have to him, the best thing you could do to him would be to go vote for A Democrat. You now have had it.

[Jen]

Had it. I'm right.

[Pumps]

I'm ready. I'm ready for the Republican resurrection. I'm. I'm locked and loaded. I wish the establishment Democrats were, but they're too similar with them to be.

[Jen]

You know what I pretend.

[Pumps]

We need. We need to start proactively beating up Kitten Hills.

[Listener Lauren]

That.

[Pumps]

That note is a reminder. We need to start proactively beating him up and proactively brow beating Nikki Haley, because it is. It is coming. The Trump cleanup is coming.

[Jen]

Yeah. You know what? Sometimes I think about and I like, here's my prediction. They're going to be. Every person that we know is a triple Trumper in our lives is going to try to revisit or rewrite history, and it's going to be like, you know, 10 years from now, 15 years from now, you're not going to be able to find more than like, a million people out of the 77 million that will admit it. That's my prediction.

[Pumps]

Yeah. They did a study on this at Nazi Germany, where a journalist went back. I can't remember the time span, but it was, you know, a decade or something later, and he couldn't find any Germans that said they supported Hitler. And of course, statistically there was.

[Jen]

Right.

[Pumps]

Tons, but nobody would admit it. And here's the thing. Some people are already starting to do this shit right now. There's already the triple Trump regret, and it's like, I'm so sorry. You tripled. You tripled. You tripled down. Like, there's no excuse for anybody, not one person that saw what happened on January 6 and then voted for him the third time. There's just. You can't say you love democracy and you love law and order and you're, you know, like, pro economy and all this. When you saw what he did with the economy last time, You're. You're a. And I'm sorry you regret your vote, but I can't. It's not even that deep. You're a. You fell for propaganda. You're not a critical thinker, and you got duped. And I'm sorry. It sucks. It sucks for you, but you need to go to therapy like everybody else has had to. Like everybody else. Everybody else had to go. I had to go. Wasn't fun.

[Jen]

I still go.

[Pumps]

Yeah, it's. It's tough stuff. This podcast is supported by FX's Love Story, John F. Kennedy Jr. And Carolyn Bessette. The new limited series from executive producer Ryan Murphy. It explores the complex courtship of the iconic couple considered to be American royalty whose love story captured the attention of the nation. Their fairytale romance would unfold in front of the public eye, where their private love would also become a national obsession. FX's love story John F. Kennedy Jr. And Carolyn Bessette. Watch now on FX, Hulu and Hulu on Disney plus for bundle subscribers. Okay guys, I've got to tell you

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[Kylie]

Okay, I've got some listener voice memos.

[Advertiser]

Excellent.

[Jen]

What?

[Kylie]

This first one is from Laura.

[Listener Laura]

Hi ladies. I've got a quick hat for you all today. I know you were trying to get some less political ones. I've had it with survey abuse. You guys talk a lot about email and phone call abuse. And I'm here to say that we've got way too many surveys going on out there. I get that. Like you want me to leave a product review, that's fine. But if you're an automated robot that fixed my company's website. I don't need to leave a review for that. I also need to leave a review if I just placed an order at an iPad for your restaurant. I don't want to leave a review about that. That's not the worst one, though. That's not what pissed me off so bad I had to call you. What pissed me off was that a couple of weeks ago I got pulled over by a copy for doing an illegal U turn. Fair enough, it was illegal. I knew that going in. But he pulls me over, lets me off with a warning, and as he's handing me back my driver's license, he also hands me a little business card with his name and a little QR code and he says, hey, if you don't mind. As if he hasn't wasted my time already. If you don't mind, the police department would really like you to fill out a survey about your experience with me today because we're trying to improve our reputation. Are you kidding me? That's the problem with the American policing system right now is that we don't have enough five star reviews. Y' all know George Floyd didn't die that long ago, right? Like, I still remember that. Also, I'm not gonna leave a survey for getting pulled over. How good of a job can you do pulling me over and letting me off with a warning for a U turn where nobody got hurt? I mean, for fuck's sake, I just had it with the surveys.

[Pumps]

I completely agree with her. I got a survey from a pap smear. You know, like, I. Yes, I want to go to the OB GYN for my annual exam. Pap smear, not enjoyable, not fun. When it's done, you don't want to think about it until the very next year. Three days later, lo and behold. How was your experience at the women's hospital today? And I just want to be like, it was miserable. I hated every aspect of it. Don't hate the employees. But the experience of getting a pap smear is not enjoyable in the least. You don't want to be reminded of it. You don't want to take a survey about it. You want to completely forget about. Same thing with mammograms. I get these surveys. How was your experience at the radiology clinic? It felt like I was in a car wash and somebody rolled down the window. And then they took the window and stuck my tit in it and just kept pushing the window up and up and up and my tit just kept getting smushed. That's how the experience was. It's not one star, it's negative 500 stars. But I'm trying to prevent cancer. Why do we have to talk about this? Why do we have to survey about it? It's so annoying.

[Jen]

100% right. Have you ever heard of. I mean, I would think that inherently the police department would know every single one of their surveys was going to be a zero star review. Right. Why would. I've never heard of that. And then I think, did they give her the warning so that she would give him a 5 star review? Like probably. And let me just tell you this. I mean, not to try to one up Laura and Jennifer. I just had AT&T come out all this with my Internet. They had to reinstall it, whatever. I'm sitting here at this very computer. Jennifer, Kylie can verify my doorbell rings. It was an in person. How did it go? Which I thought was the weirdest thing on the planet. Like why are you coming to my house in the middle of the day to ask me about how my service was? Nobody wants to talk about the service after the service is over.

[Pumps]

But you do love a survey.

[Jen]

I love a political survey. I will go all in on the political surveys and I get them all the time. Democrats, Republicans, I get them from everywhere. And I'm just going to tell you this, this is true as it can get every single survey that I get from the Trump camp. First of all, the questions are like, you believe that pedophiles should be in jail, yes or no. You know, that's that kind of questioning that you always have to agree with. Whatever. So of course I always say no whatever at the end to make your survey count with maga, you have to donate money. You have to donate money if you want your voice to be heard.

[Pumps]

Yeah. You know, it's amazing. In my upcoming book I talk about the authoritarian religions and the grift nature of them. When I was always invited to go to French churches when they were trying to save me because I was the non religious friend, I was always struck by the tithing. I was always struck by the blackmail of it, the threats, the emotional threats of it. You know, God wants you to give your money. And I always thought, God, this is really like not even kind of trying to hoodwink them. Like, it's just the tithing aspects of it were so gross. And so when they get this stuff from Trump, they're so primed because their pastors and their churches have been doing this to them their whole life. It's a very familiar thing having these figures of authority that you think are helpful to you when really all they're doing is fleecing you. And so this, this type of abuse is so familiar with the MAGA base because their pastors and their churches have been doing this to them for decades. And I'll say this once and I'll say it again to anybody who is a listener, who is religious, fine, that's great. If you go to a church and your church's goal is to expand and open up more churches, it's not a church, it's a business. And you're getting scammed. It is a scam business. There is no reason for a church to have 10, 20, 30 locations. And these churches that do that have billions of dollars in the bank, private planes, tax free and political agendas.

[Jen]

Yeah. And, and I can confirm all of that. Like I, like you said, you went into a church and it just was like, ooh, the, the tithing thing, that was just how it was. Like I never even questioned it growing up. It. Because it was just baked in. So I think you're right.

[Pumps]

Yeah, it's, it's a, it's like a, the con is so obvious, but it's, it's like, you know, God will favor you if you tithe. And you would think that a church would be like, if your family is suffering now and you need money for child care and you need money for food, by all means, do not tithe. We do not need the money. But it's the opposite. It's. They like you need to tithe the most when your money is the tightest because that's when God is going to reward you. It's the craziest shit I've ever heard. It's the same shit that Trump does. But I mean to a non believer, non indoctrinated person, it's so obvious. That scam. And they're snake oil salesmen. But yet these mega churches are still flourishing. And I think what we're experiencing right now in the electorate is the megachurch boom of the 80s. That generation is now voting and they're all MAGA.

[Jen]

All of them. Yeah,

[Pumps]

it was. Remember the megachurch boom? That's when all my peers were trying to drag me off to get me saved. You tried to get me to go to your mega church. I'll never forget.

[Jen]

I mean, I just hadn't, I just hadn't thought about the boom being in the 80s. And now I'm going over at my head and you're. Yeah, that's exactly what it was

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[Kylie]

Okay, up next we've got Lauren.

[Listener Lauren]

Hello, it's Lauren. I am a blue dot in crazy ass Florida. I live in one of the last Democratic strongholds in Florida though. I live in Orlando AKA the theme park Capital. I have a little girl. We enjoy going to the theme parks and I have had it with Maga matching family merch at Disney World. We were there a couple weeks ago. We're enjoying time with our little girl. Disassociating. Enjoying Mickey Mouse magic. A family of 12 walks by kids, grown ups in Charlie Kirk Memorial merch at Disney World. Why? For what purpose? And it's crazy because liberals are the one indoctrinating their kids. I have had it. I need Disney, all the theme parks, I need them to do something about this. It is an eyesore every time we go to the parks. It is so upsetting to see like little children in weird Maga merch. I hate it. I've had it. I want to disassociate and enjoy the magical time with my little girl and I have to be inundated with the fucking lunacy. I have had it. I love you guys. You give me sanity in this crazy time in this crazy swampland. Thank you so much. You guys rock.

[Pumps]

That's wild. I mean, whole family, 12 deep and Charlie Kirk shit. That is just. That is like, it is such a cold. And I mean, here's the thing. The, the post death Charlie Kirk rebrand has really been a flop. You know, they, they really tried with this funeral to make it this moment. And they went so hard with this nationally televised megachurch wwe weird patriotic Nazi style funeral. It's really weird shit. I mean the stuff that the speakers were saying, Erica Kirk and Donald Trump weirdly embracing as fireworks were going off. And then you went in the audience, you had all the hand praisers. And this is something interesting in the Bible Belt that people have to understand. So I know a lot of Christians obviously living in the Bible Belt, but there's degrees of Christians and so there's like the Episcopalians, the Methodists, the Presbyterians, and they would consider themselves the classy Christians. And universally I always had a lot in common with them, even though I wasn't a Christian, because they hated the evangelicals as much as I did. The evangelicals are the trashiest branch of Christianity imaginable. And there's this church I talk about a lot in Oklahoma City called Life Church. And we would and Crossings Christian Church, where pumps went. And there are these really gaudy, huge, big ostentatious, gross churches whose goal is to, you know, produce more and more churches. And every time they have like, it's baptisms, they do full blown like Instagram reels of people getting dunked in the dunk tanks and stuff. And so I always found camaraderie with my friends that were Christian light because the performative nature of these mega church evangelicals and how trashy it is was a unifying cause. And so as turning point and the Trump regime puts this trashy, even among Christians, the lowest of the low, the white evangelical mega churchers, they prop them up to the stage. There's been a backfire to that because all the. Charlie Kirk has kind of dropped from the news cycle. And also turning points relevance is a total joke because Erica Kirk has just continued this shameless grifting. And I think the, the religious Americans that aren't crazy Bible thumpers saw that. It was a reminder. Oh yeah, we fucking hate these people. These are the con artists. These are the people that hijacked our religion. These are the racist ones. So I think there's been a big backfire about the way they rolled out his post death rebrand.

[Jen]

Yeah, I hope you're right because that service, whatever you want to call it, rally was very familiar to me, having grown up around that. But it grows. It was so offensive. But it. There was a certain sect of the population that was all in on it. They thought, yes sir. Re My mother included, no doubt.

[Pumps]

Yeah. But I don't, I don't think they, they baked into the majority of Americans. They're not familiar with that. The cult sect of Christianity where they do the hand raising and the pastor, you know, has the headset, you know, all that just cheesy. Yeah, it's so, it's so gross. It's so cheesy. And it's such a part of the maga religious culture.

[Jen]

Absolutely. The Kyle ride of it all.

[Pumps]

Kylie, didn't your pastor wear the headset microphone?

[Kylie]

Yeah, he's got like the Britney Spears microphone

[Jen]

with nude tape.

[Kylie]

Yeah, I remember the moment we were kind of early in the megachurch and he wasn't super rich yet. You know, you watch that growth. I remember watching him get ripped, tanned and get a stylist. Skinny jeans on, nice new outfit every time. Like I saw it happen.

[Pumps]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Started looking better. Probably started having an affair. You know, they say when you lose a bunch of weight, you start going to the gym. It's, you know, you can always kind of pinpoint that to the affair. So probably. You probably don't know, but that's probably happening too, if I'm guessing.

[Advertiser]

I love.

[Pumps]

Pam's just starting a rumor about a big mega church pastor right here on I've had it he around on his wife.

[Advertiser]

I mean, I don't know if that's true or not, but I'm going.

[Jen]

I'm just telling you 25 years in divorces. When you have a spouse that all of a sudden is going to the gym all the time, getting super ripped, buying new clothes, looking good, like, the other spouse will sit in your office and say, that's when I should have known. That's, that's when it happened. Because all of a sudden, all the that they never thought was important became important.

[Pumps]

I, I, I can't argue with that. Pumps. I think that is some rock solid reasoning, and I think megachurch pastors are disproportionately cheating on their spouses, per your evidence that you just submitted. Yeah.

[Jen]

Yep, that's how it is.

[Kylie]

Okay, the last one is from D. Hey, Jen.

[Listener D]

Hey, Pumps. Hey, Kylie. Girl. My name is D. A fellow listener from Cal. And let's get into what I've had it with. I've had it with desperate pick me racist. It's.

[Pumps]

Look at me. Look at me.

[Listener D]

Wait, no, look at me. I'm a racist.

[Listener Laura]

Look, look, look.

[Listener D]

No, look. You're not looking enough. I'm a racist. It's the most annoying thing in the world. I like to call it Instagram racist because they always want likes and views for racism. It's like, girl, what, you want a fucking cookie because you're a racist? Like, we've had it. We've all had it. It's the most obnoxious thing in the world. I've had it. I hate it much. So, so much. I hate it so much. And it's so shocking because as a young woman, to see so many of my fellow peers be pick me racist. I'm like, okay, we get it. What do you want a racist cookie? Because we don't. We have nothing else. We're trying to get through everything that you and your little fellow racist have put us through. We get it. You are the most vile human being on the planet Earth. We got it. I hate it. It's so annoying. I've had it. I've freaking had it. And for moving forward at this point, it's them and their lineage. Because what does an eagle say? Pumps off. Thank you.

[Pumps]

I just want to say, D, I hear your fatigue of that, and it just pains me so much that racism is so allowed and been so allowed and so many people don't call out racists in this country, and now they're being rewarded. Racism is being rewarded and amplified in this administration, and I hear your fatigue and just, you know, black people have been on the front lines of the fight for equality in this country so much more than white people. It's not even close. And all we can do now is try to build legitimate allies that branch over for decades if we can save this country. And I just think we need to bring back Cancel Culture and the Pick Me racists need to be canceled.

[Jen]

Here's the thing, the racists have always been there, but they have been so emboldened with this administration and the people in it. And I am hopeful and optimistic that Cancel Culture will come back after this because that shit's on the Internet forever. The people that are so proud to be racist at some point, history will not be kind to them. I hope their neighbors won't be kind to them. But I, I really believe that there's going to be the pendulum swing back. I. I'm hopeful anyway.

[Pumps]

All right, guys, thank you for tuning in. Thanks for all the calls. If you want to call in, it's not technically a phone call. Here's what you have to do. You have to go to Instagram and open up the DMs and you'll see a little microphone and you send a voice memo to have had it podcast on Instagram. And Kylie and Seth will mine all of these and hopefully you can get featured again. Go to Instagram at. I've had it. Podcast and send a voice memo. That's all we have. We'll see you next Tuesday and Thursday. I'll tell you what I've had it with. Let's hear it. I've had it with that. Listen up, patriots, gaytriots and natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News.

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It's Monday through Friday. Every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the

[Pumps]

United States of America. Always served with a side of petty grievances.

[Jen]

We are on all the available platforms. Apple, Spotify, go Google, whatever you get your podcast and YouTube, please go rate,

[Pumps]

subscribe and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind. Pumps, pumps. What does an eagle say?

[Jen]

Caca.

[Pumps]

A little bit more enthusiasm.

[Listener Laura]

Caca.

[Pumps]

That's it.

[Advertiser]

That's.

[Pumps]

That's, that's the patriotism that this country needs right there.