Jeff Lewis Has Issues

Episode: Fortune Feimster & Sarah Colonna: Velvet Couch & Same Siders
Date: March 25, 2026
Host: Jeff Lewis (SiriusXM)
Guests: Fortune Feimster, Sarah Colonna

Episode Overview

This episode is a lively, candid, and often hilarious catch-up among friends, with Jeff Lewis joined by comedians Fortune Feimster and Sarah Colonna. They cover everything from awards show chaos and home renovations to personal quirks, celebrity run-ins, and hot takes on the etiquette of restaurant seating. As always, Jeff keeps things no-filter and fun, airing grievances from slow restaurant service to velvet allergies, and inviting stories about parties, pets, and the messiness of real life.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Fortune’s Career Updates and the Oscars (01:21–08:02)

• Fortune’s filming projects in Las Vegas: Wrapping up 'The Fifth Wheel' for Netflix (with Kim Kardashian, Nikki Glaser, Brenda Song, directed by Eva Longoria).
  • On Eva Longoria as director:
    "She's really good. Very decisive. Knows what she wants.” – Fortune (01:53)
• Golf show with Will Ferrell: Completed, airing this summer.
• Oscars experience: Seated with the ‘Zootopia 2’ cast (Jason Bateman, Ginnifer Goodwin, Yvette Nicole Brown).
  • “It’s an honor to be nominated. Listen, K Pop Demon Hunters was humongous, but so was Zootopia 2. It made almost $2 billion.” – Fortune (02:40)
• Oscars logistics: Long hours, sparse food, tight security; not as glamorous as outsiders think.
  • “At the Globes, I had to wait an hour just to get in. At the Oscars, the security’s even tighter.” – Fortune (06:07)

2. Furniture Drama: The Allergic Reaction to Velvet (08:02–11:10)

• Jeff’s furniture project at Fortune’s house: The green velvet sofa debacle.
  • “I found the most beautiful, velvety kind of sofa… I don’t want velvet.” – Jeff and Fortune (08:52–09:01)
• Fortune insists on a velvet allergy:
  • “I got rashes on my arm.” – Fortune (09:08)
  • Jeff accuses her of being “Faye Dunaway” difficult:
    “She’s just being difficult for the sake of being difficult.” (10:13)

3. Home & Lifestyle Chatter (11:10–15:18)

• Housekeeping confessions: Fortune uses an elderly but beloved housekeeper (now easier with a one-story house).
  • “I was so happy to get out of the two story. I hate the stairs.” – Fortune (13:04)
• Backyard upgrades:
  • Discussion of fake grass, lemon trees, hiding the sauna, and “tits out” hot tub design flaws.
  • “The bench was too high… it’s tits out. Hot tub.” – Fortune (14:18)
  • “They built that for a lesbian?” – Jeff (14:51)

4. Pets, Cat Instagram, and Bad Pet Behavior (16:21–19:56)

• Sarah’s cats, including “Cat Benatar”:
  Her cat’s Instagram following (Felice NaviPaws) reaches 1,643.
  • “Now you have to do double posting.” – Fortune (16:43)
• Reluctance to adopt more pets:
  Fortune: “I just want to see my own dog that I never get to see.” (17:25)
• Cats acting out: Ralphie, the boy cat, leaves messes when left alone; Sarah tries play mat solutions.

5. Dining Out & Restaurant Etiquette (19:00–24:48)

• El Mariachi and Chili’s:
  Discussion of “Loco Mondays” and slow service at Chili’s.
  • “Chili’s should not take 45 minutes… We knew exactly what we wanted the second we walked in.” – Jeff (24:06)
• Menu favorites and food talk: Mango iced tea, burgers, ranch dips, and lunch specials.
• Restaurant seating gripes: The "same side of the booth" couple phenomenon.
  • “You call them same siders?... It’s weird to me.” – Jeff & Sarah (37:09–37:14)
  • “I think you like the same side because you can get fingered.” – Sarah (42:13)

6. Awards, Celebrations, & Parties (21:22–36:09)

• ‘Handsome’ podcast wins GLAAD Award: Tig Notaro accepts with minimal speech.
  • “She was just like, thanks, girl. Thanks for letting us do this nonsense. Bye.” – Fortune (20:39)
• Submissions for awards: The group learns about self-submitting for GLAAD, Emmys, Oscars, and more.
  • “That’s why we haven’t won anything.” – Jeff (22:48)
• Food at parties: Stories about impressive catering (Mexican food, turkey pot pie empanadas at Todd's birthday).
  • “It was just station tables. I ate station after station.” – Unidentified Female Guest (33:47)
• Fortune’s mom’s 80th birthday party (and cancer diagnosis):
  • “Her one request, she said, I’ve never had a birthday party… now that she has cancer, she pulls: ‘I have cancer. I should have a party.’” – Fortune (35:17)

7. Travel, Flying, and Airline Opinions (44:18–46:16)

• Southwest Airlines complaints:
  No perks, more expensive, and now only cleaning the premium seats.
  • “They said they’re only going to clean those seats… all seats should be clean on an airplane.” – Sarah & Unidentified Female Guest (44:57–45:16)
• Bed bug precautions with delivered beds.

8. Inside Radio & Workplace Banter (46:44–50:04)

• Live read criticisms: Andy Cohen says Jeff’s reads are monotone; group roasts him.
  • “Am I not emoting enough?” – Jeff (46:51)
• SiriusXM Spirit Week:
  • “You know what would boost people’s spirits? Stop laying people off… give somebody a raise once in a while.” – Jeff (48:33)

9. Personal Health Trends (38:59–40:09)

• Ozempic and peptides:
  • Casual talk about weight-loss injections, fitness fads, and drips.
  • “People need to have nice curves.” – Sarah (38:45)
  • “I was there for three hours [getting the NAD drip].” – Jeff (39:59)

10. Upcoming Shows & Plugs (42:30–43:14)

• Fortune’s tour dates: US and Europe, including OKC, Fayetteville, Little Rock, Dallas, San Antonio.
  • “FortuneFeemster.com for dates, for venues, for times, for tickets.” – Jeff (43:01)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Velvet Allergy:
  “I got rashes on my arm.” – Fortune (09:08) “She’s just being difficult for the sake of being difficult.” – Jeff (10:13)

• On Oscars Seating:
  “I want to be able to sit on my couch and look at someone else cooking without getting arrested.” – Fortune (10:50)

• On Hot Tub Design:
  “It's tits out. Hot tub.” – Fortune (14:18)
  “They built that for a lesbian?” – Jeff (14:51)

• On Pet Ownership:
  “You would ruin my disgusting poop right on that velvet couch of yours.” – Sarah (19:04)

• On Same Siders:
  “I think you like the same side because you can get fingered.” – Sarah (42:13)
  “That’s why we’re going to win a GLAAD award for that.” – Unidentified Female Guest (42:24)

• On Workplace “Spirit”:
  “You know what would boost people’s spirits? Stop laying people off… give somebody a raise once in a while.” – Jeff (48:33)

Important Timestamps

• 01:21: Fortune’s film news & Oscars stories
• 08:02: Fortune’s velvet couch allergy and design debate
• 13:04: Love/hate with stairs and one-level living
• 14:18: Hot tub bench too high ("tits out hot tub")
• 16:21: Sarah’s cat’s Instagram, “Cat Benatar”
• 19:00: Cat mischief, Fortune’s absentee pet parenting
• 21:22: ‘Handsome’ podcast wins GLAAD Award
• 24:48: Slow service at Chili’s; dining opinions
• 33:05: Party food, Mexican catering, empanadas
• 35:17: Fortune’s mom’s 80th birthday/cancer
• 37:09: “Same siders” at restaurants etiquette
• 42:13: “I think you like the same side because you can get fingered.”
• 43:14: Fortune’s tour dates and promo
• 44:18: Southwest Airlines complaints
• 46:44: Andy Cohen says Jeff’s live reads are monotone
• 48:33: SiriusXM “Spirit Week” and layoffs rant

Final Highlights

The episode is a streaming blend of lighthearted complaints, quick-fire banter, and genuine friendship chemistry. Jeff, Fortune, and Sarah riff on pet drama, the absurdity of awards shows, the headaches of home design, and the quirks of restaurant culture—all wrapped up in sharp one-liners and mutual roasting. For listeners who love candid industry talk, comic chaos, and first-world problems handled with humor, this episode delivers.

Listen to Fortune’s tour info at FortuneFeemster.com and follow Sarah’s cat at Felice NaviPaws on Instagram!