Jared Freid & Sarah Colonna: 10 pounds & Confrontations

Summary

Podcast Summary: Jeff Lewis Has Issues

Episode: "Jared Freid & Sarah Colonna: 10 Pounds & Confrontations"

Date: June 3, 2026
Host: Jeff Lewis (SiriusXM)
Guests: Jared Freid and Sarah Colonna

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Episode Overview

This episode of Jeff Lewis Has Issues gets real about personal battles—from the lifelong struggle to lose “just 10 pounds” to confrontations with country clubs, neighbors, and even staff. Comedians Jared Freid and Sarah Colonna join Jeff in a hilarious and candid exploration of neurotic food relationships, country club mishaps, parenting dilemmas, and the art (or reluctance) of confrontation. The honesty and chemistry between the trio create a funny, self-deprecating, and at times surprisingly relatable hour.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Path from Finance to Comedy

• Jared’s Origin Story (02:15–04:07)
  • Started as a finance major at Penn State (“The dumb one. Not Penn, the football one.” — Jared).
  • The thrill of making people laugh in emails led him to open mics in New York.
  • Sold life insurance and did financial planning as his fallback—“Real stupid fallback.”
  • On telling his parents he wanted to be a comic:

    “They reacted as if I had just come out of the closet... ‘How long have you known that you’ve been funny?’” (03:38–03:50, Jared)

2. The Secret to a Happy Marriage

• Sarah’s Marriage Philosophy (04:23–04:45)
  • Jeff jokes: Sarah and her husband John are happy “because they have no kids and they’re rich.”
  • Sarah: “We start [the week] on Tuesday… it’s half off in the Valley, I highly suggest it.”

3. The Case of the Missing Passport

• Friend Drama (05:18–07:37)
  • Sarah shares about comedian Chris Frangiola missing his own birthday trip to Cabo—lost his passport in a rental car.
  • Panel discusses how losing a passport would spark endless ribbing in their families.

4. Food, Weight, and Family Judgment

• Struggling with Food & Weight Loss (08:46–12:04)

  • Jared recounts feeling endlessly policed by his “Jewish mom who can’t stop talking about my weight.”
  • “I have a special coming out on Netflix… about my dad asking me how much I weigh while we were at the beach. Naked. Publicly.” (09:44–10:07, Jared)

• Perpetual Dieting & Night Eating (12:07–14:03)

  • Jeff and Jared bond over nighttime eating binges, Postmates enabling bad habits.
  • Sarah orders Menchie’s frozen yogurt via delivery: “I just want the toppings.” (11:53–12:00, Sarah)

5. Ozempic, GLP-1 Drugs, and Modern Weight Loss

• The Miracle Drug Debate (13:00–15:29)
  • Jared: “I think anyone who’s anti-GLP1 is a dumb idiot who shouldn’t be allowed in public… it’s like ADD medication for eating.”
  • Jeff refuses to take GLP1s due to side effects.
  • Jared: “The 10 pounds have been on my mind my whole life." (11:13, Jared)

6. Country Club Confrontations: Mulholland Hills Mess

• Joining for Tennis, Getting the Runaround (19:50–24:47)
  • Jeff details his saga joining Mulholland Hills Country Club for his daughter’s tennis lessons—but the club backtracks on promised court times.
  • “I am a fucking member… I don’t want my daughter playing tennis at noon when it’s 105 degrees, right? This is not why I joined.” (21:51, Jeff)
  • Shane and Jeff consider escalating, with Jeff vowing, “We can do it the hard way or the easy way.” (24:09)
  • Jared: “Any time you go and argue with them… as a gay man, really lean in. That’ll really get them to scurry.” (24:21)

7. Confrontation Styles: Should Sarah Pop Off?

• Flight Etiquette Dilemma (27:13–29:05)
  • Sarah tells a story about refusing to swap exit row seats for a family separated on a flight.
  • Jeff: “If I were you, you’re married to a huge football player, you could pop off all you want and you’ve got a bodyguard.” (28:54)
  • Sarah admits, “I like to keep it inside and then bitch about it on the radio.” (29:05)

8. Neighborhood Petty: Reporting Violations

• HOA & Historical Society Drama (43:24–46:55)
  • Jeff contemplates reporting neighbors for rule infractions (“trampoline in the front yard, hedges too high”).
  • Jared: “Be who you are. You're sitting here on the radio: I am going to turn you in. There are rules we need to abide by.” (45:58–46:09)

9. Additional Comic Exchange Highlights

• Buffet Tryout Strategy (38:51–39:24)
  • Jared explains his meticulous approach: sample everything, only return for "the winners.”
• Confrontation Highs (43:09–43:19)
  • Jeff: “It really gives me energy because I was feeling so good after the roofer confrontation. That’s why I want to take on Mulholland Hills now.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Family Weight Policing:

  “I have needed to lose 20 pounds and wanted to lose 10 pounds, but 10 pounds have been on my mind my whole life.” (11:14, Jared Freid)

• On GLP-1 for Eating Control:

  “It’s like ADD medication for eating… I used to go get snacks and then they were gone in 10 minutes. Now they last a week.” (13:01–14:03, Jared Freid)

• On being openly litigious:

  “I am not looking to make friends. I don’t give a shit about neighborhood barbecue. I just want a nice neighborhood—with no trampolines in the front yard.” (46:36–46:41, Jeff Lewis)

• On Owning His Role as the Complainer:

  "What you're doing right now is the best thing—you're openly doing it. Be who you are." (45:58–46:09, Jared Freid)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:15] Jared’s shift from finance to comedy
• [05:18] Cabo passport fiasco
• [08:46] Family pressuring about weight
• [12:07] Nighttime eating & Postmates enabling
• [13:00] GLP-1 and weight loss debate
• [19:50] Mulholland Hills Country Club confrontation saga
• [27:13] Sarah’s airplane seat switch dilemma
• [43:24] Jeff admits to “Karen” behavior with neighborhood rule infractions
• [47:01] Jared promotes his book and tour

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Plugs & Closing

• Jared Freid's Book: Walking Red Flag: Dating Advice From Your Favorite Guy Friend
  • Available for preorder (Amazon, Audible, jaredfreid.com)
  • Live dates in multiple cities
• Standup: Jared on the road—see episode end for tour cities
• Sarah Colonna: sarahcolonna.com

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Tone & Atmosphere

The conversation is breezy, irreverent, and confessional. Jeff leads with his signature no-filter honesty, while Jared and Sarah riff on shared themes of family neuroses, self-sabotage, privilege, and the absurdities of adult life with self-deprecating humor and zero shame. The banter is quick, the stories relatable, and everyone, at some point, is the butt of the joke—including themselves.

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For listeners new and old, this episode delivers candid laughs, neurotic candor, and plenty of take-home fodder for anyone who’s ever lost a passport, counted a drink, tried to lose 10 pounds, or wanted to report a neighbor for seven-foot hedges.

Transcript

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[Ryan Reynolds]

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Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month Required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail] when you're Jeff Lewis,

[Jared Freid]

the drama never stops.

[Jeff Lewis]

For the last is a decade, you've been covering disasters.

[Jared Freid]

That's right.

[Sarah Colonna]

That's why he's here.

[Commercial Disclaimer Voice]

The math ain't mathin' and the gay ain't gayin'.

[Jeff Lewis]

Later you're gonna need to do maintenance.

[Commercial Disclaimer Voice]

Why?

[Jared Freid]

To be attractive. For who?

[Jeff Lewis]

Oh, for us.

[Jared Freid]

Jeff Lewis has Issues.

[Jeff Lewis]

Hey, welcome to Jeff Lewis Has Issues. In today's episode, Jared Freed and Sarah Colonna join the show. We talk about losing 10 pounds and checking out of hotels. Plus I try to convince Sarah to be more confrontational. Good morning.

[Sarah Colonna]

Good morning, Jared.

[Jeff Lewis]

Welcome.

[Jared Freid]

Great to be here.

[Jeff Lewis]

I hope you're funnier than Sarah.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

Oh, no, no.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. We can't have two duds this hour.

[Jared Freid]

It's gonna be a lot of sadness this morning.

[Jeff Lewis]

It's gonna be. So I was talking to Jared a little bit. You were a finance major at Penn State.

[Jared Freid]

That's right. The dumb one. Not Penn, the football One? Yeah. Not the smart one.

[Jeff Lewis]

And then how did you end up becoming a comedian?

[Jared Freid]

I just liked writing funny emails to friends. You know, I'm 41, so if you're around my age, like, the group email was the original group text. And, you know, you'd make fun of people for the last weekend and then make plans for the next weekend, and I'd sit there making fun of my friends, and then someone would go off that email chain and write to me, oh, my God, I'm dying at my desk. And it felt like, you know, it felt like drugs in my veins. So I was like, I'm gonna start doing open mics, and I'm gonna start doing all this stuff in New York.

[Jeff Lewis]

And so you went to New York?

[Jared Freid]

I was living in New York. I was in New York at the time. Like, when. After college, it was like, where do you move? I'm from Boston. But, like, where do you go after college? It was like, there's money and women in New York. You know, like, what did you do

[Jeff Lewis]

to make money while you were doing that?

[Jared Freid]

I sold life insurance. No, I was selling life insurance and annuities. I was. I was doing financial planning. Like, when I got out of college, I didn't think of being a comedian. Like, that was like a crazy. That wasn't what I was thinking. I was like, I want to go into business. I want to, like, find whatever my career is going to be.

[Jeff Lewis]

So this was your fallback?

[Jared Freid]

Yeah. Right? Yeah. Real stupid fallback.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. The backup plan for the comic isn't usually how it goes, but I like it.

[Jared Freid]

I mean, I remember telling my parents that I wanted to be a comedian, and they reacted like, as if I had just come out of the closet. They're like, yeah, you know, they're like,

[Jeff Lewis]

how long that bad?

[Jared Freid]

That's. It was. They were like, how long have you known that you've been funny? You know, like. You know, like, that was like their opening line to this whole thing. And, you know, my dad was like, oh, it's like a business, you know, you're going to. Oh, you want to be one of the guys sitting around the table writing on 30 Rock? Because that was the show that was big at the time. And I was like, yeah, I'm going to go knock at the door at 30 Rock and have a job.

[Jeff Lewis]

Sarah, what did you do to make make money while you were pursuing comedy?

[Sarah Colonna]

Bartending.

[Jeff Lewis]

That's right. And then you. Then you got really smart. Just married rich.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. After. I was already successful, though, so I should have married A football player when I was bartending.

[Shane]

That would have been skipped a few studies.

[Jeff Lewis]

Sarah and John are one of the few, very few couples that I know that are actually happy.

[Jared Freid]

Really.

[Jeff Lewis]

I think it's because they have no kids and they're rich.

[Jared Freid]

That's a good.

[Jeff Lewis]

They have no stress, zero stress. They just party. They drink, they go to Cabo. They go to El Mariachi every Monday night for happy hour.

[Sarah Colonna]

It's actually during the afternoon that we go.

[Jared Freid]

Afternoon. It's generous.

[Sarah Colonna]

It's half off. It's in the Valley. If you happen to be here next Monday, I highly suggest it.

[Jared Freid]

Next Monday?

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

I gotta start my week.

[Sarah Colonna]

We start ours on Tuesday.

[Jared Freid]

Tuesday, yeah. You guys are Memorial Day weekend every. Every week.

[Jeff Lewis]

That's what. Happy couples.

[Jared Freid]

That's right. No, I, I listen, I. That's the life. How many road weekends a month are you doing? Like, I.

[Sarah Colonna]

Well, at the beginning of the year, I was like 16 weekends in a row. So I didn't. So then I've been off for a couple, and then I'm doing next weekend. And then. So I usually, like, do two a month.

[Jeff Lewis]

She was in Cabo in a bikini this last weekend. We have another friend of the show, Chris Frangiola, who's a very successful comedian, very funny. He was. It his 60th birthday?

[Sarah Colonna]

It was. Yeah. And he didn't go. He called me the night before and said, I. You're gonna kill me. You're gonna kill me. And I said, what happened? He said, I lost my passport.

[Jeff Lewis]

No.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. And he was like, it's always in the same place. We put our bags by the door. I went to go get my passport out of the bag. It's always in and it's not there.

[Jared Freid]

Always an awkward moment when a friend doesn't have a passport right before you're supposed to go away. Cause you have that moment where you're like, well, good luck with that.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

Like, I'm gonna go sit on the beach now. I know. That's.

[Jeff Lewis]

So this was all for his birthday weekend.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yes.

[Jeff Lewis]

And he had to stay home.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. And his wife, I think, considered maybe coming, but then she was like, I think I shouldn't. I don't know.

[Jared Freid]

She probably considered divorce.

[Sarah Colonna]

I know. She was like, we've torn the place apart. At one point she goes, I looked in the attic for the passport. It's never even. We've never even been in the attic. But he had gone on the road in Toronto or something a couple weeks ago, and he thinks he must have just left it in the Rental car.

[Jared Freid]

Brutal.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. He felt so bad. I was like, you don't.

[Jeff Lewis]

You needed to get back into the country.

[Sarah Colonna]

Well, he. He had driven across. So he left it in the rental car in, like, New York when he got.

[Jeff Lewis]

Now, if John did that, would that infuriate you? Like, how did you not know you lost your passport?

[Sarah Colonna]

I don't think so. I mean, I just felt. I. I just felt bad for him. I was like, you understand we're still going, right?

[Jared Freid]

Like, we can't.

[Sarah Colonna]

We're not canceling the night before.

[Jeff Lewis]

I'm saying if you were Chris's wife.

[Jared Freid]

Oh.

[Jeff Lewis]

And you're planning on this really fun Memorial Day weekend in Cabo, and. And he can't find his passport. Are you a bit annoyed?

[Sarah Colonna]

Yes, absolutely.

[Jeff Lewis]

I am, too.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Sarah Colonna]

Absolutely. I think she probably had to really balance the fact that he was having a big birthday, and she probably had to really find her inner peace.

[Jeff Lewis]

I didn't realize it was the passport. Cause I heard that he didn't go. And then I thought, well, why don't you just take a later flight? I thought he left his passport at home.

[Sarah Colonna]

No, he lost it.

[Jeff Lewis]

Just flat out lost it. What do you think about this, Jared?

[Jared Freid]

Brutal. I mean, you're saying, like, what. You know, would you ever forget? Forgive? I just think of, like, if my dad ever lost a passport ever in his life. My mom. That she would, like, never.

[Jeff Lewis]

Never.

[Jared Freid]

It would be brought up every five minutes.

[Jeff Lewis]

That's what I would do for the

[Jared Freid]

rest of my life. Like, even if I forgot my passport, my mom would talk about it for the rest of my life. Like the. Like, I'm considered the lazy, messy one in my family. My brother is considered the neat, you know, put together one.

[Sarah Colonna]

I wouldn't. And I wouldn't get that from you.

[Jared Freid]

Oh, my God. Well, for my mom. My mom. My brother used shoe trees when he was 8 years old in shoes. And then from then on, he's the neatest person.

[Commercial Narrator]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

Never had a problem.

[Jeff Lewis]

I know you think it's a gay thing. It's not a gay thing. It's a control thing.

[Jared Freid]

Is that what it is?

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah. He's not gay, right? No, it's a control thing. Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

At least we don't know, you know, who knows? Oh, no, no, he's.

[Jeff Lewis]

You don't get a vibe.

[Jared Freid]

Don't get the vibe. No. But the. But all my mom talks about. He's 37 now. Shoe trees. Oh, my God. Harry with the shoe trees. And it's like he was 8. Like, if I could go back, if I could go back to my. If I could go back to when I was 8 years old and, like, be like, Jared, you know, throw away your tissues after, you know, whacking off. You know, like, I. Like, I'd be like, clean up after yourself. So you can like, have not, you know, don't have a reputation.

[Sarah Colonna]

So she can't let it go.

[Jeff Lewis]

You are a foodie.

[Jared Freid]

Love it.

[Jeff Lewis]

And is your mom. Your mom is a health nut.

[Jared Freid]

No, she's just a Jewish mom who can't stop talking about my weight.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

Like, I literally woke up this morning, I made a TikTok about going to the Delta Sky Club in between. Because I landed in Salt Lake and then went Salt Lake to here last night. So I had 15 minutes. Went to the Delta Sky Club. I was picking up stuff like, you know, no one can eat 30,000 calories as quick as me. And I. So I go to the Sky Club and I start. I'm eating brownies. Like, you know, like marathoners take those little cups on the way. Like, I'm just popping brownies. So I made a video about it. I woke up, my mom commented on my TikTok. This has to be a joke, right? Me talking about having brownies at the Sky Club. Like, she is on both my parents. They're crazy.

[Jeff Lewis]

My grandmother did this. She monitored her weight and everyone else's, Right?

[Sarah Colonna]

Oh, no.

[Jeff Lewis]

And commented on everything, which is why I probably have somewhat of an eating disorder.

[Sarah Colonna]

I was about to say, that's why you weigh yourself every day.

[Jeff Lewis]

Twice a day. Do you weigh yourself?

[Jared Freid]

No, I. Well, this is my whole special. I have a special coming out about my dad. We were at the beach. I have a whole hour special coming out on Netflix in the fall. And the whole thing is about my dad asking me how much I weigh while we were at the beach. We were literally at the beach as naked as you could be publicly. And my dad's like, how much do you weigh? And I was like, so does he

[Jeff Lewis]

publicly shame you, too?

[Jared Freid]

No, it's just a discussion. It's just all the time. It never ends. Like, it's like, you know, eat, eat, eat. Jared, we got to talk about your eating. That's, like, every conversation. Jared, sit.

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

Eat.

[Jared Freid]

You're not eating. What are you eating all that for? Like, there's no right move. Like, we went to this place, Mortarano's, Martorano's in Fort Lauderdale. Awesome place. Great place. This place is like a famous. The chef is on the DJ booth while you eat. He's literally DJing this guy from Philly. It's all. They're playing old movies on the screens. It's like a. It's loud, it's fun. We get everything. We order literally everything on the menu. And then it's like the end of the meal, we're still, like, picking at it. They're like, jared, enough. Like, they decide you're full for you. Like, it's like a crazy dynamic. And I love them. And I. I'm there for the argument, but it's like, it's something you like. My dad offered me his Ozempic. He was just like, take it.

[Jeff Lewis]

You said. You have said you're always trying to lose £10.

[Jared Freid]

My whole life.

[Jeff Lewis]

I'm with you on.

[Jared Freid]

Right. It's on your mind at all times. The 10 pounds. I've gained 10 pounds and then wanted to lose 10 pounds. I've needed to lose 20 pounds and wanted to lose 10 pounds, but 10 pounds has been on my mind probably my whole life.

[Jeff Lewis]

Now, let me ask you this. I thought about this yesterday. Uber Eats and Postmates has ruined my life.

[Jared Freid]

Right? You got to get off the phone.

[Jeff Lewis]

It is absolutely ruined my life. Because I was thinking, before this, I just didn't buy groceries, right? So now it's 8 o' clock at night. I go through the pantry. There's nothing there. I can't eat right now. Postmates. I can have anything I want in 17 minutes.

[Jared Freid]

No, it's anything.

[Jeff Lewis]

Anything I feel like I can have in 17 minutes.

[Sarah Colonna]

You ever ordered menchis from Postmates? That's my move sometimes. Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

Seriously?

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Shane]

The whole fun part is doing the toppings yourself.

[Sarah Colonna]

I don't give a shit about that. I just want the top. I just pick them out. But, you know, because you don't have a yogurt place. Yeah, it's like a. Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

You're a nighttime eater.

[Jared Freid]

I. Oh, always. I've been eating at night my whole life. That's my addiction. I've been sneaking to the kitchen you don't want over again. But menchies, you're talking about when they do the cheese, when you get the frozen yogurt delivered, and then they separate out the toppings, and then you're like, oh, my God, I just ordered a whole candy bar. Like. Like, I have. Yeah, I've done that. I know, exactly. And you're like, oh, it'll be 52.50. Yeah, of course. That's how much an ice cream costs.

[Sarah Colonna]

How did I get shamed for El Mariachi listening to this one?

[Jeff Lewis]

I don't know. It's gotten so bad in my house that we have to buy. So I have my daughter every other week. We buy snacks on Monday when she comes home. They all have to be out of the house by the following Monday, because otherwise I will nighttime eat all of her snacks. So I have to give them away. Like, I'm like, housekeepers, whatever. Like, take the chips, take the pretzels, Take. Get them out.

[Jared Freid]

Do you. Are you on a GLP1?

[Jeff Lewis]

No.

[Jared Freid]

No.

[Jeff Lewis]

It makes me sick.

[Jared Freid]

I'm on it now.

[Jeff Lewis]

Physically sick.

[Jared Freid]

I'm on it now. I think it's a miracle drug. I think it's. I think it's more comparable to ADD medication. Anyone who's against the GLP1 or thinks their hot take is. Is correct, that it's like, that is in any way anti glp when I think they're a dumb idiot who, like, shouldn't be allowed in public and should be, like, publicly shamed because you would never be like, well, I'm against ADD medication. That's really what it is. And this nighttime eating thing that I've always had that you have, like, the snacks in the house, like, I used to. Or go get snacks, and then 10 minutes later, they were gone. Like, now they last a week. And it's a. It's such a game changer. And even just being on a little bit of a GLP1, you're like, oh, my God, I can't believe how easy people's lives were who are in good shape. Like, skinny people. I have no respect for. Like, I think. I think they've had an easy life. Like, what you're talking about. We live a harder life. We've. We sat out sitting up in bed going, should I eat the food? Just have a little. Oh, I'll have the leftover.

[Jeff Lewis]

And then you make yourself feel so

[Jared Freid]

guilty, and you feel so guilty.

[Jeff Lewis]

I know.

[Jared Freid]

And you have, like, what is Jillian Michaels is like, out there being like, well, people don't want to work. Oh, no, no, we don't. We've been working too hard. I've been working harder than skinny people their whole life. My whole life. I have been. The idea that we're not working hard is so insulting to how hard I've been working my whole life to not order a cookie at a coffee shop.

[Jeff Lewis]

We have a chump here who's. Who's also has an eating problem. He eats too much Michael Beck. Michael Beck. And he started red. A true Tide. And I think it's working for him. Are you doing that?

[Jared Freid]

I'm doing. We'll go, whatever. Whatever I can get at Costco because it's cheaper.

[Sarah Colonna]

How much. How much weight have you lost?

[Jared Freid]

Like, well, this is another.

[Sarah Colonna]

Oh, you look great.

[Jared Freid]

I've lost. Thank you. I've lost, like, ten pounds. That's all I want. I don't want the. I don't want the look. I don't want to look like. You know, the problem is with the GLP1 community, with us chubbies, is that we have the best.

[Jeff Lewis]

He's looking at me.

[Sarah Colonna]

He was talking to you.

[Jared Freid]

What's that?

[Jeff Lewis]

You're looking at me.

[Jared Freid]

But it's a personality. Like, we have great hearing, so we're the worst type of people who could ever be on a drug that could help us lose a little weight. Because now it's like you. You know, you have someone like, oh, you look good, and you're like, okay, okay, don't go too far. You don't want someone being like, what are you doing? You know, it's this weird in between.

[Jeff Lewis]

But we need to lose less weight, so that way. Cause we're always gonna fluctuate. Right?

[Jared Freid]

Right.

[Jeff Lewis]

So. So I actually probably should lose 20, so that way I can fluctuate the 10.

[Jared Freid]

You and I are the same brain. I have said the exact same thing. I need to lose 20 so that I can be at 10. I know exactly what you're talking, but I think. What the GLP one. I mean, we were eating before this. Like, I used to have so much stress.

[Jeff Lewis]

I didn't eat.

[Jared Freid]

You didn't have the cake?

[Jeff Lewis]

No, it was hard not to eat.

[Sarah Colonna]

You said he couldn't have it.

[Jared Freid]

You gotta go on it. See, Carney, I'm no doctor, but you and I share a brain. Because I saw Carney's. I can't believe.

[Jeff Lewis]

Saw me staring at it, right?

[Jared Freid]

I saw you staring at it. I saw the sweat dripping down your brow.

[Jeff Lewis]

Honestly, it's dripping now that you're talking about it.

[Jared Freid]

Now I. That. Look at. There's me and Carney Wilson. I can't believe I. I said this is, like, out of it. It was like I was dreaming. This.

[Sarah Colonna]

This is crazy.

[Jared Freid]

I didn't know.

[Jeff Lewis]

She feeds me. She's a feeder. She's a feeder.

[Jared Freid]

She. I was like, I can't believe I'm eating Carney Wilson's baked goods.

[Jeff Lewis]

How good was it?

[Jared Freid]

Unbelievable. But I would have. There was a time before G of P1. I would be like, oh, my God, if I eat this, then you would find me in an alley with a bunch of Dunkin Donuts on my stomach, completely naked. Like, I. I would have lost it. Do you know what I mean? Like, I would have. Like, I would have just gone on a. Like, on a bender. On a bender. And now I have that. And it. It's freed me from this fear of, like, if I have one, I have to have 30. And that's the big thing, because I know what you're talking about. You didn't want to. You, you know, you're a smart person. You know that.

[Jeff Lewis]

Well, I don't know.

[Jared Freid]

Okay. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know how much math goes into flipping houses. But I. But I. I'm saying, you know, inherently, that having one piece of Carney Wilson's baked goods isn't going to ruin your life. You know? But you. You're so worried about the 12 things you're going to eat after it. And that's why I think, oh, my

[Jeff Lewis]

God, you're absolutely right. Because then I feel like the diet's already ruined.

[Jared Freid]

Right? Today is gone. It's my brother. My brother and I used to live together. We call it a wash. Yeah. Like, we'd eat. I have. I do a thing. An eating day is like, my brother and I live together, and we go, is it a wash? We'd agree. We'd have to agree, is today a wash? And he'd be like, it's a wash. And then we go get three bacon, egg and cheeses and then have an amazing lunch and amazing dinner.

[Jeff Lewis]

Now, you have a great body, but you drink a lot. Is. Do you just. Do you just not eat?

[Sarah Colonna]

No, I drink on the weekends and sometimes on Mondays.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah, you just.

[Sarah Colonna]

I'm good. Like, we. I work out a lot. And we. And Monday through Thursday, we are good. I cook at home. We. We eat well, my grand.

[Jeff Lewis]

You don't work, you don't have kids. You can exercise for two hours.

[Jared Freid]

So you're not eating? No, I eat.

[Sarah Colonna]

No, I eat a lot.

[Jared Freid]

You're not binging?

[Sarah Colonna]

No, no, no.

[Jared Freid]

My grandmother used to always say she would. This is my grandmother's health advice.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

She'd be like, you can drink or you can eat. You can't do both. That was her big health advice. You can do one or the other.

[Jeff Lewis]

She's right.

[Shane]

That's what's right.

[Jared Freid]

Because Sarah's talking about drink. Sarah's having a weekend with pina coladas and fun and Monday drinks. But that would be followed by doordash orders for me. Like, I would be. There would be two different door Dash guys being like, wait, we're here for the same house. You know, it'd be like an awkward two girls showing up to hook up with me at the same time.

[Jeff Lewis]

So your parents, they're watching what you eat? My grandmother used to watch what I eat and my dad watches what I drink. He's a drink counter, right?

[Jared Freid]

Oh, they.

[Jeff Lewis]

And now I've become a drink counter.

[Sarah Colonna]

Oh.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Sarah Colonna]

I don't like drink counters.

[Jared Freid]

No, Nothing.

[Jeff Lewis]

But I'm a quieter. But I'm a quiet drink.

[Jared Freid]

My dad's also.

[Shane]

I have until the show the next day.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah, right.

[Sarah Colonna]

You'll.

[Jared Freid]

You'll, you'll put it away for when you need that information.

[Jeff Lewis]

Well, you had seven drinks.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah, right. My dad. So my mom is a food counter. My dad's a drink counter. Which is. I mean, like, I'm living in hell.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

I use my. They live at a country club in Boca and they're literally out of a sitcom. And I remember they make you a country club poor. There's such a thing as, like when you go to a country club, they're gonna pour you a real drink.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yep.

[Jared Freid]

So I would, I used to be. I used to wake up the next day, my dad, I would go, yeah, I think I had two martinis. He would go, you had six?

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah. Country club pork.

[Jared Freid]

Three. He would count them as three each. So now he's doing his own math.

[Jeff Lewis]

We just joined a country club last week. Although. And you. Because Shane loves a country club cob.

[Shane]

That's kind of the whole point. Like a cob salad at a country club. Like it just, it's. It just tickles. Every itch.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah, I feel it. I get it.

[Jeff Lewis]

However, we are having some issues.

[Jared Freid]

What's the problem so far?

[Jeff Lewis]

But going to let them make it right. So Mulholland Hills Country Club.

[Jared Freid]

Okay.

[Jeff Lewis]

My sister in law and my brother joined. We have a couple chumps that are members. So I went there with the. I was basically going to put my daughter in tennis lessons. And so when I was walking through with the membership director, I said, look, I'm joining this club so I can get my daughter into lessons. And so I said, she's like, when do you, you know, we have camps or whatever on during the week. I said, no, she's got a busy week. I said, I need to do it either Saturday morning or Sunday morning. It doesn't need to be a camp. We can do a private lesson. Well, let's go down and talk to the pro. So we get in a little golf cart, we drive down there and this really nice guy named Ethan. It's important to story because then they eventually threw him under the bus. But Ethan says, I think we can work that out. We can find a pro that will teach her.

[Jared Freid]

Not.

[Shane]

I think he, he pulls up the computer, he looks at the schedule, he goes, oh yeah, well we'll fit her in.

[Jeff Lewis]

And then Katie, the membership director is right there, right? And that's gonna be important because she's hearing this. And I said, okay, as long as I can get her into a lesson. And I said, I have her every other week, so either a Saturday or a Sunday every other week, then this will be worth it to me. No problem. Sign up, take my money, year contract. And then I said, my daughter's a girl's girl. I think it might be good if she, if she uses a female instructor. The female instructor reaches out and what happens? Shane? And you need to read. And you need to read that.

[Jared Freid]

You know what? I will.

[Shane]

She emails.

[Jared Freid]

This was all agreed upon before the correct. Before the check correct.

[Jeff Lewis]

Now Deanna, is that her name? Deanne. D.N.

[Shane]

denny.

[Jeff Lewis]

Denny.

[Jared Freid]

They're trying to get that initiation.

[Jeff Lewis]

Of course they are.

[Jared Freid]

Right.

[Jeff Lewis]

And they got it right.

[Shane]

So then I email her to schedule. Hey, can we do Sunday 531 at 10am for her first what? And she says, unfortunately we are not allowed to teach before 12 on Saturdays or Sundays because there are not enough courts for the members. But I could fit her in after 12:30.

[Jeff Lewis]

So I said, I am a fucking member, right? So I'd like a court. And I don't want my daughter playing tennis at noon when it's 105 degrees, right? And this is not why I joined. So we got back to Denny and then Denny, you cc'd Katie.

[Shane]

ICC Katie. And I was like, we specifically met with Ethan and asked this question. This is why we joined. We need to do this. If you can't do it, please, like tell me who can. Because someone should teach her on something.

[Jeff Lewis]

But Mulholland Hills Tennis Club is on notice right now.

[Jared Freid]

I'm not going to be ignored.

[Commercial Disclaimer Voice]

No, it's not going to stop. It's going to go on and on until you face up to your responsibility.

[Jeff Lewis]

So what are they got two ways of doing this.

[Shane]

She said, Ethan is new and he does not know all of the policies.

[Jeff Lewis]

That's such a bullshit because Katie was standing right there and now they're both throwing Ethan, the nicest guy under the bus, right?

[Sarah Colonna]

So now they're, this is a problem. So they're saying it's a real Problem?

[Jared Freid]

No, this is. This is a real problem. I would be. This would keep me up at night.

[Jeff Lewis]

Oh, no, no, no. I already said to Shane, because I've been on Shane's case for the last week, and I said, I'm gonna fight this war.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

And so we either gonna make an exception or I'm gonna close them down.

[Jared Freid]

Did they know I'm gonna set that place on fire?

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

Yes.

[Jared Freid]

Hey, what happened to the country club? Well, a new member had a radio show and made sure that we closed. Yeah. Did they know you had a. You know, a place to talk about them?

[Jeff Lewis]

I just. I think people underestimate me.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Shane]

But also, it doesn't matter. They said that we could do it. Now they're saying we can't do it.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And also, no matter who I told

[Jeff Lewis]

Shane today, I go. I go, you should back me, because it's taking the attention off you. Because I was hard on him last week.

[Shane]

So now I'm fanning the flames. I've sent three.

[Sarah Colonna]

You're like, what else can they do? So did they. So when you said you're a member, though, like, that's. They're just basically saying for members to play. Not.

[Jeff Lewis]

They don't know what they're doing.

[Sarah Colonna]

It doesn't matter.

[Jeff Lewis]

They have no idea.

[Jared Freid]

It's a shell game. This is. This is how they get. Get you in the door. Then once the check is clear, they've got your hundred grand or whatever amount. Ridiculous initiation fee they've charged. And now I will get to you. Oh, yo, the system.

[Jeff Lewis]

We can do it the hard way or we can do it the easy way.

[Shane]

We show up today or tomorrow.

[Jeff Lewis]

Wait till I start showing up. Because they don't know how. They don't know what they're dealing with.

[Sarah Colonna]

They don't know how crazy you are.

[Jeff Lewis]

No.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

Wait till I show up at the membership office.

[Jared Freid]

Anytime you go and anytime you go and argue with them, here's what you have to do. As a gay man. This really isn't. That'll really get them to, like, scurry.

[Shane]

That's good.

[Jared Freid]

You gotta just start with.

[Sarah Colonna]

And say, does this have something to do with me being gay?

[Jeff Lewis]

But you know what? My boyfriend's black.

[Jared Freid]

Oh, my God.

[Jeff Lewis]

Gay and black.

[Jared Freid]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Sarah Colonna]

Oh, no. No gay or blacks before noon, you're

[Jared Freid]

gonna have a whole Tennessee.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah, okay, I see what you're saying.

[Jared Freid]

You're gonna own this tennis club, and

[Jeff Lewis]

they just did a $26 million renovation.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah. This doesn't really. Right. No, no, no, no.

[Commercial Disclaimer Voice]

Because I Won't allow you to treat me like some slut you can just bang a couple of times and throw in the garbage.

[Jeff Lewis]

Exactly.

[Jared Freid]

That's right.

[Sarah Colonna]

It's a long one.

[Jeff Lewis]

Exactly. So you're right. I am going to start visiting the Mulholland Hills Tennis Club. Not to use any of the facilities, just to terrorize them.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Shane]

And I will take a Cobb salad to go on the way out.

[Jared Freid]

Right?

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Because I had to drive all the way there.

[Jared Freid]

Extra bacon.

[Jeff Lewis]

They'll probably kick me out before I get my money back. I think. Right.

[Shane]

I think they'll do the right thing. I think she's gonna have a 10.

[Jeff Lewis]

See, they don't understand chumps.

[Jared Freid]

No.

[Jeff Lewis]

All I have to do is say the word and they'll have a thousand negative reviews.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

And that's conservative.

[Jared Freid]

And we're not ready yet. We're not ready.

[Jeff Lewis]

Not ready to un.

[Jared Freid]

Hold off chumps.

[Jeff Lewis]

Jar me.

[Jared Freid]

Let us.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. Don't.

[Jared Freid]

They're all. They're all sharpening their pencils, sharpening their phone.

[Jeff Lewis]

They're home. Bored, too.

[Jared Freid]

Right.

[Jeff Lewis]

You know what I mean? I've got. I'm fighting a roofer, but it's just not satisfying because he's given in so easily.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

What's the roofing company? Roofing Services Inc. Roofing Services Inc. Hector is the owner.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

He dropped some shit on my car when he was doing the neighbor's roof.

[Jared Freid]

Oh, my God.

[Jeff Lewis]

And then they hopped the fence, trespassed, cleaned up the mess.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

But. Dented car. And then they tried to play dumb like we don't know what happened.

[Sarah Colonna]

Tried to gaslight him, so.

[Jeff Lewis]

But it was Hector's employees. Not Hector. Hector himself was gaslighting Hector initially. Yeah. He was gaslit by his own employees?

[Shane]

I think so.

[Jeff Lewis]

He initially defended his employees, but now he's come around and so he's gonna pay.

[Jared Freid]

He got the full story.

[Jeff Lewis]

$5,000 in damages. 5,000.

[Sarah Colonna]

Wow.

[Jeff Lewis]

And that is a deal I got from my chump. That's how much damage there was to the car.

[Sarah Colonna]

Oh, that's a lot more than I thought it was.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah. Where do we go? Eurobody? Tarzana.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

It's chump owned.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

Oh, you're not here. You're in Florida.

[Jared Freid]

I'm in Florida.

[Jeff Lewis]

Okay.

[Jared Freid]

If I need.

[Sarah Colonna]

There's.

[Shane]

There's chumps down there, too.

[Jared Freid]

If you find. Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

If we find some chumps in Florida, there's chumps everywhere.

[Jared Freid]

I'm driving a white Jeep Wrangler

[Sarah Colonna]

that

[Jared Freid]

I named Cher Horowitz.

[Jeff Lewis]

Seriously, That's a car or four Door.

[Jared Freid]

Because that's the car she has in Clueless. So my car is named Chair Horowitz.

[Jeff Lewis]

It's kind of gay.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

I mean, it's kind of gay.

[Shane]

It's okay. It's okay.

[Sarah Colonna]

Can I tell you something that happened to me yesterday now that you're getting people mad?

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah.

[Sarah Colonna]

Okay. I was on. We were flying on JSX on the way home.

[Jared Freid]

You really are living the rich life.

[Jeff Lewis]

She is.

[Jared Freid]

This is crazy. There's someone right now who has to Google what that is.

[Jeff Lewis]

Look at her ring. Look at her ring.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah, the ring is huge.

[Jeff Lewis]

That's not lab grown. No, no, that's a natural diamond right there.

[Jared Freid]

Sarah actually said, look how bloody good it looked when I came in. And I said, wow, she's really just living a different life.

[Sarah Colonna]

No, I need your guys on my side on this. So we're in exit row. We get it the night before. And so I know that it was available up until the night before. We get on the plane. Row 10, two kids, row 12. They're parents. Okay. And I already see what's happening. Cause the father is standing, like, over John instead of in his own kid's aisle and trying to fuss with him. And I think they're trying to get us to maybe just offer our seats. And then the woman says, do you mind switching with us or do you like the exit row? And I started to move. And then I was like, wait, your two kids are next to each other? It's one and one.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sarah Colonna]

Why don't one parent sit with one kid and one parent sits.

[Jeff Lewis]

Exactly.

[Sarah Colonna]

So I was like, no, we like the exit row.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sarah Colonna]

And then. And the dad starts making this big scene with this kid. He goes. He goes, honey, honey, I'm gonna be right there. You can see me. I'm right there. Don't worry. I wanted to be like, but you could be right next to it.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yes, you could.

[Jared Freid]

Right?

[Jeff Lewis]

That's what I would say.

[Jared Freid]

And the kid was 20.

[Sarah Colonna]

And then we start to say, we're. And then we're taxiing. And the kid says back to his mom, he wants Cheez Its. And she's like, you're gonna have. You're just gonna have to wait until I can get up and bring them to you. And I go, I'll hand them to him. And so hand me the cheese. It's like, that was fun.

[Jeff Lewis]

If I were you, you're married to a huge football player, right? You could pop off all you want. And you've got a bodyguard.

[Sarah Colonna]

That's true.

[Jared Freid]

You're a wag.

[Sarah Colonna]

I'm a wag.

[Jeff Lewis]

Why don't you.

[Sarah Colonna]

I don't. I don't know. I like to. I like to keep it inside and then bitch about it on the radio.

[Jeff Lewis]

That's the problem. It's freeing to be an asshole.

[Sarah Colonna]

I know.

[Jared Freid]

Plus, he's a punter, so you can just take.

[Jeff Lewis]

He's huge. You should see this guy.

[Sarah Colonna]

Well, I also thought.

[Jared Freid]

I've seen him. I, you know, we have a weird connection.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah, he knows.

[Jared Freid]

He was a punter on the same team as the kicker who went to high school with me.

[Sarah Colonna]

He's a good friend of John. Steven Hauschka. He went to high school.

[Jared Freid]

Steven Hauschka. They won a Super bowl together. I went to high school with him and I've always known that she was with.

[Jeff Lewis]

But you don't know John.

[Jared Freid]

Never met him.

[Jeff Lewis]

Okay. So there's really. I mean, yeah, there's a connection, but not really.

[Jared Freid]

I'm sorry to underwhelm. You know, I tried my best to make a connection between two people.

[Jeff Lewis]

Six Degrees of Separation we live in

[Jared Freid]

a digital world, okay. I'm trying to find any way to connect with people.

[Jeff Lewis]

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[Jeff Lewis]

okay Brittany Schmidt was Comedian Brittany Schmidt. She was scheduled to come in on Thursday. We did get an email from her PR firm yesterday. What was the email we got?

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

So we got this email Monday morning of Memorial Day I got a text from Shane. Check your email lol. And this Is what it says.

[Jared Freid]

Check your email. LOL here.

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

I'm. No.

[Sarah Colonna]

Hi.

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

Hello. Just says. And this is from her publicist. I'm so, so sorry. Britney wanted me to let you know her boyfriend cheated on her and she has to move to New York and can't do the show. N. She doesn't care if you tell anyone. She didn't even write out Ann. She wrote she doesn't care if you tell anyone.

[Jared Freid]

Oh, boy.

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

Oh, and there's no period.

[Jeff Lewis]

That's a chump.

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

And there's no period. It's like. I mean, it's so beyond. That's insane.

[Sarah Colonna]

That feels like a. Like a prank.

[Jared Freid]

That's what I said.

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

I said, did she get fired from the publicity firm? And now she's just like sending off emails. Like, this person's an idiot. This person.

[Jeff Lewis]

He thought she got hacked.

[Shane]

No, I. I thought that you said that she got hacked. And I was like, well, why would a hacker say this? And like. And the way that it was typed is not like totally out of character of this person. So I was like, it seems very.

[Sarah Colonna]

You've dealt with this person before.

[Jared Freid]

Country club. Not know what they were dealing with.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

Your guests are outing the boyfriends. You know, like, she's crazy.

[Sarah Colonna]

Does she have to move because of that today?

[Shane]

Why is she moving right now?

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

But her colleagues on this. So then I thought, well, the colleague would have responded and been like, so sorry. That was sent by accident.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

Because I thought she would reach out directly.

[Jared Freid]

Brittany, that was on her. That's her being like the boyfriend. People need to know.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

Like she should have said his name because we would have said his name. And you would have called him out as being a cheater.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. He's probably on her Instagram or something. Right.

[Jeff Lewis]

I thought about that. She's probably got rid of him by now.

[Jared Freid]

Sure.

[Shane]

She took him off or she's.

[Katie or Brittany's Publicist]

She doesn't care if you tell anyone.

[Sarah Colonna]

I feel like if I was the colleague, I would have replied all and just put like a little asterisk and written and you know, and just been like, can we. Can we at least.

[Jeff Lewis]

So, Jared, you're looking for. To join a country club in Florida. And you were telling me about the membership directors there.

[Jared Freid]

It's tough. It's. They. What you're dealing with, with the country club here is the same. No matter where you go there, there's an initiation fee and they're looking to get you to pay up and they want you.

[Jeff Lewis]

You compared them to use car dealers.

[Jared Freid]

It's a little bit Used car dealer. Because they, I think they can. I think we don't know what the amount. You know, they're just making up amounts.

[Jeff Lewis]

So what did they say to you about the initiation?

[Jared Freid]

They were like, well, you know, well, you give us a number. And I'm like, give us a number. Zero. That's the number. That's my number. Zero. And then. But why would I give a number to like against myself?

[Jeff Lewis]

Why would I. Yeah, you're negotiating against yourself, right?

[Jared Freid]

Why would I do that? So it's like, no, I don't want to give you a number. Like you, I give zero. Now I'm just like your daughter with tennis. I'll serve you a zero. You come back with what you, what your number is.

[Sarah Colonna]

I mean, that's like what, that's what they asked me in Mexico at the pharmacia. How much you want to pay?

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

Right.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

So while I was there negotiating, they said, oh, the monthly membership is like $460 or something. Right. But they said, we strongly, strongly recommend X Life.

[Shane]

Yeah, it's called X life.

[Jeff Lewis]

Which is what, 586amonth?

[Shane]

Yes, it was an extra like hundred bucks or so.

[Jeff Lewis]

But it's 50% off food and non alcoholic beverages. And I thought, the way I eat, that's gonna pay for itself. And then, and I actually, I had texted my sister in law, I texted judge Lauren Lake. I'm like, hey, do you guys do ex life? They're like, for sure do. You'll say you'll save money. But I didn't trust. I didn't trust. So I had to text my family and my friends to find out, like, hey, is this a scam? Is this ex life gonna pay for itself?

[Jared Freid]

They, I mean, it wouldn't be good for me because I like to bring like a knapsack full of food and candies and drinks for myself. Like when I go to the, like a beach club with my parents. My parents belong to the beach.

[Jeff Lewis]

You bring your own snacks.

[Jared Freid]

My parents bring leftovers from dinner the night before. My dad's eating a chicken. We're on the beach at a full beach, full service. My dad's e a chicken leg. Like he's a king from a renaissance fair. Like, he's literally eating a full leg.

[Jeff Lewis]

So when they check into a hotel, they buy their own water.

[Jared Freid]

Oh, they're not buying the water. If I had touched the hotel water growing up, my parents, it would have been like me putting down a line of cocaine on the table to do.

[Jeff Lewis]

I think it's always Smart to bring your own water. It is a ripoff.

[Shane]

Oh, It's.

[Jared Freid]

It's crazy.

[Shane]

$12 for, like, a normal water.

[Jared Freid]

Because they know you're going to. Here's the thing. If you're a drinker at all. Yeah. You're going to wake up at a hotel and that $12 water doesn't matter. You're like, just give it to me. They know you'll break.

[Sarah Colonna]

You bring your own water, and then you refill it in the gym.

[Jared Freid]

Right.

[Sarah Colonna]

Well, that also tells why I'm rich.

[Jeff Lewis]

It's not because your husband played football for 10 years.

[Sarah Colonna]

No, it's because I. It's because I refill my water in the gym.

[Jeff Lewis]

Okay.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah, that's.

[Jared Freid]

That's the advice boomers give you. Just refill your water in the gym and you'll have. Be able to buy a home.

[Jeff Lewis]

You have a buffet strategy.

[Jared Freid]

I have a what Buffet? Oh, my buffet strategy. I. I do. You gotta go up and you do tryouts. You do. You know, I go up and I get all. Everything. And then you find little.

[Jeff Lewis]

A little bit of.

[Jared Freid]

A little bit of everything. And that's what the tryouts are.

[Jeff Lewis]

Okay.

[Jared Freid]

So then. Then a few people make the team. So then you go back and you have all the winners from the tryouts. You have your starting five.

[Jeff Lewis]

Okay.

[Jared Freid]

And then you go back a third time for the all Stars, and you have thirds of what? The things that were the best. And that's.

[Sarah Colonna]

You would have loved the soup plantation. Do you know about the soup plantation? Yeah, he would have loved the soup plantation.

[Jeff Lewis]

This is a fe we had here in Los Angeles. We talk about all the time. We miss it, but I do that on Thanksgiving. I do that. I do the tryouts.

[Jared Freid]

You start with a little.

[Jeff Lewis]

And then I do the exact same thing. The third time, it's just the turkey again and the stuffing, because that's my favorite.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

So I'm. I'm going back three times for turkey and stuffing.

[Jared Freid]

See, my dad at Thanksgiving likes to brag that he goes all sides. He talks about it as if it's like a. Like a. Like a talent he has.

[Sarah Colonna]

Like, he'll.

[Jared Freid]

He'll look. He'll literally. If you. If someone new is at Thanksgiving, he'll go, check out my plate. All sides. All sides. And you're like, dad, that's not. We can all do that. You know that. You know, he's like, no one's impressed.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

He loves telling you that he gets all sides. And also his daily routine. My dad loves to tell people, I wake up I go to the spin class, I do my sit ups, I go in the pool. Who is doing that much at my age? Who is doing this much at my age? And then they, and then people, I just watch the person stare at them. Like my dad, Like, I envy the boomers because they grew up in this world where like, you had your. You were an individual without knowing you weren't an individual. Like, we, we, we have grown up in this Internet world where you saw that your life is not that interesting as compared to people were doing the same thing in Ohio that you were doing in Boston. And my dad grew up in a world where nobody does sit ups at 65, you know, and I wish I had that. I wish I had that.

[Jeff Lewis]

You love a Karen video.

[Jared Freid]

Love a Karen video.

[Jeff Lewis]

I was watching him yesterday before I even read this morning.

[Jared Freid]

I read I would have watched you at the country club fighting y.

[Shane]

We're gonna go viral tomorrow.

[Jeff Lewis]

I was watching Karen videos yesterday, and this one. So this woman comes over and rings the doorbell and she tells her neighbor that she's just got back from Vegas, she pulled an all nighter. She's exhausted. She's trying to sleep in the middle of the day and her baby's crying. And can you do something about your baby? And the lady's like, I'm exhausted too. I'm dealing with a newborn. Well, can't you get, can't you get this baby on a schedule? She goes, she goes, would you. She goes. And then the woman with the baby's like, can you just close your windows? It's too hot. I'm not going to close my windows. But it's like these in Karen videos, I mean, they're amazing to me.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. See, this is why I don't want to confront anybody. This is why. Because I don't want, I don't want a video.

[Jared Freid]

I was. I don't want to know where they find the energy. You go, I have the energy for listening with one ear as it's happening.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

Like, I don't. When I see someone, like, just like getting ready for an argument, like, that's how they live their life.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

Like, I. I just can't imagine. And like, I was at Starbucks at the airport. This woman, she. She was like, they didn't have. She ordered like a sandwich on the, on the app. And they're like, hey, we don't have your sandwich on the app and we're gonna give you something else. And then she's like, I don't want it at all. They go, okay. Well, we're gonna put the money back on the app. They go, she goes, no, I want cash. And they're like, you got it on the app. We can't give you cash.

[Sarah Colonna]

It doesn't work like that.

[Jared Freid]

It just doesn't work like that. We're not like a bank, you know, this isn't an atm. And the woman goes, give me a manager. And I was like, here we go. Like, I locked in. I like sat down, got popcorn out. I was like, I'm ready to watch this crazy person who will not take a step back from. I need $50 in cash from you for the egg white, you know, bacon sandwich that I didn't get. And I'm like, I just can't understand. Like, don't you have a life? Don't you have other things you have to put your energy into? Like, this is. I'd be exhausted.

[Jeff Lewis]

I find the energy, it really, it energizes me.

[Shane]

Gives him energy.

[Jeff Lewis]

It really gives me energy because I was feeling so good after the roofer confrontation.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

That I think that's why I want to take on Mulholland Hills now.

[Shane]

It's like riding the high.

[Sarah Colonna]

Blood in the water. A little blood in the water.

[Jeff Lewis]

I love the homeowners association. Karen's. Those are my favorite because they're self appointed right there.

[Jared Freid]

Well, they've been looking for this. This is what they wanted. You know, they. This is what gives them social credibility. This is why people. I think people join homeowners associations because no one will talk to them.

[Jeff Lewis]

I think, oh, they're losers.

[Jared Freid]

Right?

[Jeff Lewis]

So the. I, I have a historical preservation society that governs my neighborhood.

[Jared Freid]

Not losers.

[Shane]

Great people.

[Jeff Lewis]

And, but yeah, I love them all because everything, almost everything I wanted to do, but one of them, I heard went in trespassed. Went into my across the street neighbor's backyard.

[Jared Freid]

Really.

[Jeff Lewis]

To document what they were doing. Yeah, trespassed.

[Jared Freid]

Historical preservationists. That they're like the, the, the, like the, the boss level. Like, they're. Oh yeah, they're like homeowners association people.

[Jeff Lewis]

That's nothing. That's not.

[Jared Freid]

Because now you have morality. Now you have. You're ruining a historical site. Like, now they have history on their side. So they have. Can they can really put you in a moral conundrum like, oh, you need a swing set. Well, John Adams used to sleep there in a, in a, in a tent. Are you looking to ruin American history? And you're like, oh my God, would

[Jeff Lewis]

you do this, Jared or Sarah? So I've been walking the neighborhood every day. And I actually am grateful for the hpoz because they, I mean the homes are beautifully kept and it's because they're governing it. But, but then there's a few of them. Couple of them put aluminum windows, which is a. No, no. There's two of them with trampolines in the front yard. There's one of them that's allowed their hedges to grow to 7ft high. They wouldn't let me go put hedges in over 36 inches. There's a part of me, Right. That wants to turn them in.

[Sarah Colonna]

Well, the trampoline in the front yard is a real problem.

[Jared Freid]

That's a real family.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah, I agree.

[Jared Freid]

White trash with money do not put. I don't want an above ground pool. I don't want your trampoline.

[Jeff Lewis]

So why'd you turn them in?

[Jared Freid]

Yeah, I like that. They're probably pumped. They probably love you. The reason they did all this stuff for you, the historical society, why they were so amenable to you, where they were like, we found a foot soldier.

[Jeff Lewis]

I'm gonna start reading out addresses on the radio.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yes, yes. That's what you should do.

[Jared Freid]

That's right. Definitely.

[Sarah Colonna]

It's not a bad idea at all.

[Jared Freid]

You got the Flying Walidas on their trampoline. Get out of here.

[Jeff Lewis]

All right. I'm turning them in.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah.

[Jeff Lewis]

All of them.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. Trampoline on the front yard.

[Jeff Lewis]

Because I'm seeing at least six infractions. Right.

[Jared Freid]

Well, the best part, what you're doing right now is the best thing you're doing is you're openly doing it.

[Jeff Lewis]

You're right. I'm not hiding it.

[Jared Freid]

You're not hiding it. And I think this is the problem is be who you are.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah.

[Jared Freid]

You're like you're sitting here on the radio. I am going to turn you. There are rules.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yes.

[Jared Freid]

We need to abide by.

[Jeff Lewis]

I had to follow them.

[Jared Freid]

Yeah. And so because I think what really

[Sarah Colonna]

found your man here. Because I thought you ever needed in my life.

[Jared Freid]

Right. I don't mind when someone's a complainer as long as you say I am the person. We have rules. I, I, this is, I don't like when someone hides behind. Well, as a father, you're right. I hate that. And I don't why I gave it to you as a, as a thank you.

[Jeff Lewis]

I'm not looking to make friends. I don't give a shit about neighborhood barbecue.

[Jared Freid]

No.

[Jeff Lewis]

I just want a nice neighborhood.

[Jared Freid]

Right.

[Jeff Lewis]

With no trampolines in the front yard.

[Jared Freid]

Right, right. This is a historical neighborhood. You're putting A trampoline here.

[Jeff Lewis]

Yeah. That's a good, beautiful house. And you're covering it with seven feet. Seven foot hedges.

[Sarah Colonna]

How tall are they allowed to be?

[Jeff Lewis]

36 inches.

[Jared Freid]

That's right.

[Sarah Colonna]

Yeah. And you have to respect the other neighbors because they go into their yard too or like ruin their view.

[Jeff Lewis]

I did want to promote. So you wrote. Well, first of all, you were put on the map. You put yourself on the map when you had your Netflix special that came out was 37 and single.

[Jared Freid]

37 and single came out in 2023.

[Jeff Lewis]

Okay. Then you followed up and you wrote a book, Walking Red flag. Dating advice from your favorite guy friend. You're on a book tour now.

[Jared Freid]

Yes.

[Jeff Lewis]

Okay. I do have all your dates in all your cities. Do you want to read them?

[Sarah Colonna]

Sure, I'll read his book.

[Jared Freid]

New York, Boston, Philly, D.C. chicago, Denver. It's a, it's, it's really. It's an interactive dating talk. We're going to talk about the book, but I'm also going to like take dating questions. And the book is really to get you inside the mind of a straight guy and what he's thinking. I get questions all the time. Why is he doing this? You know, it might be over, but people want closure. People want explanations. And there's not a lot of places on, especially the Internet where straight men are talking vulnerably about dating. And these are vulnerable stories that are meant to make you feel more positive, more empowered and happier about dating, which has really gotten depressing lately. So the feedback that I've gotten, especially from women, has been like, unbelievable. Just how there's laughs every page about a subject that is generally very tough for women because men don't care.

[Jeff Lewis]

Where do people go to buy the book?

[Jared Freid]

You can go to jaredfree.com, you can go on Amazon. You can pre order it now. Audible.

[Jeff Lewis]

F R E I D. F R E I D. You're also, I mean, you're doing comedy as well. So you have all your live shows.

[Jared Freid]

I got my live shows. I am on the road. I'm in Austin, Texas this coming weekend. Cleveland, Ohio, West Hampton Beach, Doral, which is outside of Miami, Red Bank, New Jersey. And I'm at Foxwoods and also Portland, Maine. And yeah, I do stand up. The stand up show is about my dad offering me his GLP1. And it's an hour about that. I'm trying to do the same thing I did with the beach store.

[Jeff Lewis]

Now also, if you have absolutely nothing to do between June, June 4th and 5th, you can go to Sunnyvale, California.

[Sarah Colonna]

Right. Well, it's going to be very fun.

[Jeff Lewis]

There's no good movies that week and the restaurant reservation, you can't get it.

[Sarah Colonna]

You can go to Batavia, Illinois in September.

[Jared Freid]

I love that club in Batavia.

[Sarah Colonna]

I know, the comedy ball.

[Jeff Lewis]

So if you can't see Jared freed, go to sarahcolona.com yeah, yeah.

[Sarah Colonna]

New York Times. New York Times.

[Jeff Lewis]

Try to see Jared.

[Sarah Colonna]

Sarah Colono, go see Sarah. Yeah. So you can also. And I'm gonna get your book.

[Jared Freid]

I would love that. Yeah, the book has been awesome. A two year journey.

[Jeff Lewis]

I do think we, I mean we didn't get to touch upon everything, but I do think that we are soul mates. I also believe in checking out at a I do not just walk out the door and I'll tell you why. Please check ins have gone from 2pm to 3pm to 4pm and often the room is not available. Why? Because Sarah Colona did not check out and they're waiting. And then they could have started that room at 10am to clean it and have it ready for me at 2:30.

[Jared Freid]

We're so much alike it hurts because it's a karma thing.

[Jeff Lewis]

Thanks for listening. If you want more of this, listen to Jeff Lewis Live every weekday on SiriusXM as well as the Jeff Lewis Channel exclusively on the SiriusXM app

[Commercial Disclaimer Voice]

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[Jeff Lewis]

I remember telling my boss it'll be good for the brand when leads were slow. Yeah, it it wasn't.

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