Mercedes Javid & Ryan Bailey: Big News & Big Listing

Summary

---

Jeff Lewis Has Issues

Episode: "Mercedes Javid & Ryan Bailey: Big News & Big Listing"
Date: October 3, 2025
Host: Jeff Lewis
Guests: Mercedes Javid (MJ), Ryan Bailey
(plus Shane, Annie, Keon, Oscar, Jameson, and callers)

---

Episode Overview

In this lively, spontaneous episode, Jeff Lewis welcomes Mercedes Javid and Ryan Bailey for a whirlwind of personal announcements, real estate hustling, parenting talk, classic Jeff-style roasts, and rampant chump energy. The crew covers two big pieces of news: Mercedes’ hot new condo listing and Ryan’s even bigger personal update—he’s expecting his first child. The conversation flows from property marketing hacks to baby showers and Thai massages, never shying away from Jeff’s unfiltered observations or comedic tangents.

---

1. Mercedes’ Real Estate Bombshell

[01:27–04:40 | 15:21–16:31]

• Mercedes (MJ) reveals her new condo listing at 837 North West Knoll, West Hollywood.
  • 2-bed, 2-bath, 1,118 sq ft, listed at $639,000.
  • Amenities: earthquake insurance, recently renovated pool/spa, BBQ area, side-by-side parking, secure building.
• Jeff marvels at MJ’s “marketing genius” for placing flyers in fancy hotel bar restrooms.

  “You are putting these in public bathrooms in men’s, men’s restaurants and women’s—marketing genius.” – Jeff [02:05]

• The group admires her strategy and details; MJ sells the location and value hard.

  “By far the best deal in West Hollywood. Especially the location, location, location.” – MJ [02:33]

• Callers later inquire about details and even get grilled about their finances, with the crew jokingly “running credit checks” on-air.

  “Lisa, could we get the last four of your social and credit card number?” – Ryan [16:33]

---

2. Ryan’s Big News: He’s Having a Baby

[04:31–06:51]

• Ryan announces that he and Rebecca are expecting:

  “Rebecca and I are pregnant. I’ve been given permission to say this and by the way this chumps keep secrets…” – Ryan [04:42]

• The group celebrates, discusses baby showers (with plans for both a “Chump shower” and a family shower), registry strategy, and possible baby names.

  “You should definitely do a baby shower because all the rich chumps, they’ll buy everything on your registry.” – Jeff [06:12]

• Ryan shares about Rebecca’s morning sickness, the gender (a girl!), due date in March, and anxieties about parenting.
• MJ and Jeff tease, gently interrogate Ryan’s readiness (“Are you going to have a night nurse?” [07:23]), poke fun about finances and child support, and offer (fake) co-parenting advice.
• The segment is peppered with more jokes about which cast member would be the “real father,” planning for twins, and support systems (night nurses, grandmothers, Zoila the housekeeper, etc.).

  “This will be used in court one day, this episode.” – Ryan [07:57]

---

3. Parenting, Logistics, and Chump Realness

[06:51–14:45 | 39:01–42:01]

• Talk returns to where Ryan and Rebecca will live, with MJ upselling her listing as a “crash pad for running chump dads.”
• Humorous debate on birthdays and astrological signs for the (future) baby: Aries vs Pisces.
• Discussions of baby gear—Jeff and MJ recommend going minimalist (onesies over baby denim).
• The group playfully teases Ryan for his modest lifestyle and unglamorous car, leading to a running joke about his “respectable” but “middle class” living standards.

  “Are you the poor chump?” – Lisa, caller [38:12]
  “Maybe one with a bumper.” – Jeff on Ryan’s Camry [38:58]

---

4. Social Etiquette, Hugs & Scams

[17:10–22:16]

• An extended, comically meta debate on proper hugs vs handshakes, half hugs, bony shoulders, and whether hugs are a “scam.”

  “Hugs are lazy…just give them a warm fake hug at the beginning and for the rest of the night, you can be a cold bitch.” – MJ [19:12]

• Mischievous speculation about kissing etiquette, awkwardness at group events, who smells good (Keon, Shane), and how cologne can sabotage post-hug freshness.
• MJ describes the fine art of her “bony shoulder” hug as an effective social buffer.

---

5. Callers & Community

[15:20–23:00 | 29:10–31:01 | 44:56–46:34]

• Multiple callers chime in:
  • Questions about Mercedes’ condo: parking garage fumes, noise, air conditioning.
  • Conversation with therapist Corinne in North Carolina about internet safety and body autonomy for children:

    “Eight is too late; by age eight, you should be talking to them about internet safety, body autonomy, those types of things.” – Corinne [45:06] “No, I’m gonna teach her about the half hug.” – Jeff [46:09]

  • Jessica calls in with an office supplies solution and trailside chat.
  • Margaret plugs her new ghost kitchen in LA.
• Plenty of in-jokes and playful “selling” of the property to every caller, regardless of their intent.

---

6. Jeff’s Business & Bravo Gossip

[24:41–28:44]

• Jeff vents about ongoing contract negotiations, complaints about “payment structure,” and how Bravo brings in execs (Andy) to close deals.

  “You’re not going to get Jeff Lewis on layaway. I don’t offer financing.” – Jeff [25:41]

• Reality TV insider talk:
  • Speculation about the Real Housewives of OC reboot, returning OGs, “fair” pay for veterans, show longevity, and likely Bravocon announcements.
  • Comments on the Real Housewives of New York reboot and related spin-offs.

---

7. Food, Hangovers & Living Your Best (Chump) Life

[12:19–14:45 | 36:04–44:47]

• The gang plans post-show meals: Pache, Denny’s, Carl’s Jr., with debates about hangover foods, road trips, and the advantages of eating “in bed naked.”
• MJ, Jeff, and callers reminisce about favorite LA eateries (Neptune’s Net, Irv’s Burgers, Ghost Kitchen) and surviving fire-damaged Malibu with limited food options.
• A gift card to Denny’s is recounted, with Jeff appreciating the senior menu:

  “I did [go to Denny’s] because they have a Senior citizen menu—55 and over—and I love the iced tea there. Yeah, it’s delicious.” – Jeff [44:41]

---

8. Massage TMI

[48:30–50:48]

• Ryan recounts getting a Thai massage, with Jeff interrogating whether the focus was “too much on the butt.”

  “Is Thai massage, like, focused on your butt a lot?” – Ryan [49:36]

• Everyone piles on with jokes about “butt percentages” and what’s normal.
• Discussion veers into massage etiquette, with Jeff and Mercedes teasing about “lady boys” and the intensity of Thai massage techniques.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On chump baby registry:
  “Like, we’ll announce it here on the radio...we’ll fill the whole registry.” — Jeff [06:18]
• On baby’s potential personality:
  “Now I’m worried that Shinjin is going to be awkward like you.” — Jeff [20:44]
• On financial transparency:
  “You’re not going to get Jeff Lewis on layaway. I don’t offer financing.” — Jeff [25:41]
• On hugs:
  “Hugs are lazy… you just give them a warm fake hug at the beginning and after that, you can be a cold bitch.” — MJ [19:12]
• On Rebecca’s baby:
  “I don’t think that baby’s yours. I just don’t.” — Jeff [41:50]
• On “ghost kitchen”:
  “Is ghost chicken a term for, like, ghost chicken?” — MJ [42:49]
• On parenting advice:
  “Eight is too late. By age eight, you should be talking to them about body autonomy and internet safety.” — Corinne [45:06]

---

Key Timestamps

| Time | Segment | |-----------|----------------------------------------------| | 01:27 | Introduction of Mercedes’ new real estate listing | | 04:31 | Ryan announces baby news | | 06:51 | Discussion about baby showers/names/gender | | 15:21 | Callers ask about condo listing details | | 17:10 | Full vs half-hug debate | | 24:41 | Jeff on Bravo deals and payment disputes | | 29:10 | Jessica’s call, office supplies, and trail chat | | 36:04 | Food and hangover plans | | 44:56 | Therapist call: child safety/body autonomy | | 48:30 | Ryan’s awkward Thai massage story |

---

Tone & Atmosphere

Fast-paced, irreverent, and playful, with Jeff’s signature sarcasm pushing boundaries but the group always circling back to warmth, real friendship, and community. MJ’s flair for sales, Ryan’s earnestness, and the ongoing crew banter deliver on both laughs and genuine heart.

---

For New Listeners

This episode perfectly blends outrageous humor, reality TV gossip, authentic friendship, and classic LA lifestyle details. If you’re here for the chump drama, Jeff’s take-no-prisoners attitude, or simply love a wild group dynamic, it’s a must-listen!

---

Transcript

[A]

When evaluating potential hires for your small business, it's essential you look beyond resumes. Sure, a candidate may appear impressive on paper, but understanding the person is crucial. LinkedIn, the world's largest professional network, provides a complete view of your candidates skills, experiences and interests. With LinkedIn's up to date data, you can be confident that you really know who you're hiring. Post your free [e-mail] Pandora that's LinkedIn.com Pandora terms and conditions apply.

[B]

This episode of Jeff Lewis Has Issues is brought to you by the Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas. You know, there's something about Vegas at night. The buzz of the crowd, the high energy and that undeniable magic that makes you feel alive. When the sun sets, Las Vegas transforms. And at the heart of it all is the Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas. A luxury resort destination where bold experiences unfold. Sip a martini inside the chandelier. Discover hidden speakeasies, striking art and unforgettable views of the Bellagio, fountains and the Las Vegas skyline from your Terrace suite. It's not just a hotel stay, it's an only in Vegas. Book your stay now @cosmopolitan Las Vegas.com.

[C]

When you're Jeff Lewis, the drama never stops.

[B]

Doug said it was dumb, but maybe I'm dumb because I enjoy it. Maybe I'm just talking about the news. We don't talk about the news here.

[A]

No, just sex.

[B]

There's gotta be that one actor or actress that nobody likes. Cause we have that here.

[A]

Oh my God.

[C]

Who is it?

[B]

Me.

[D]

Jeff Lewis has issues.

[B]

Hey, welcome to Jeff Lewis has Issues. In today's episode, Mercedes Javit and Ryan Bailey join the show. Ryan shares big news, but MJ shares even bigger news. Plus, we talk about butt massages and eating naked in bed. Mercedes, you crack me up. Okay, so we were at this very nice hotel last night, hotel bar. And in the restrooms I noticed on the counters were real estate flyers for for this really nice condo on West Knoll. What I didn't realize is that Mercedes pictures at the bottom of the FL and that you are putting these in.

[A]

Public bathrooms in men's, men's restaurants and women's Marketing genius.

[B]

And actually when I looked at it, I was like, it looks like a really good value.

[E]

It really is.

[B]

Can we say the address?

[C]

Sure, of course.

[B]

8 3. So for anyone in Los Angeles looking for a condo, 837 North West Knoll, it seems like a really good value. It is at 639, two bedroom, two bath, 1118 square feet. This would have been good for Shane by the way.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

It was not on the market at the time.

[C]

It's brand new on the market. It is an amazing value. By far the best deal in West Hollywood. Especially the location, location, location.

[A]

Wow. We just got to see Mercedes real estate prowess.

[B]

What are the homeowners?

[C]

$600.

[B]

Okay, that's not bad. What do you get for it?

[C]

Earthquake insurance. They have a really nice pool and a spa and really nice outdoor barbecue for the common area.

[F]

Is there an extra door for the ice?

[C]

What about parking two side by side, full size, extra wide parking spaces.

[E]

Holy shelf for printer.

[B]

Shane, you got ripped off. I know. You should have bought this one.

[E]

I'm going to put mine on the market.

[C]

Shane was in the.

[B]

Maybe we should buy this too. Yeah, it seems like a really good value.

[C]

There's. It is by far the best priced.

[B]

How's the building? The outside of the building?

[C]

It's a nice building. It just got painted an an eggshell like a Swiss mocha. You know that Nice.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Off white color Swiss mo.

[C]

You can walk to everything. You really don't need to have a car if you live on West Knoll because you're right by Matahisa And I.

[B]

Lived in West Knoll and I loved it and I regret not buying the house. I was renting it and I loved living there.

[A]

You could get this for Monroe as like an early graduation.

[B]

The only problem is from Monroe. Is it on the first floor? I worry about security from Monroe.

[C]

The. The community gated garage is on the first floor. So unit 106 is higher than street level.

[B]

Oh good.

[C]

Yes. The. The first floor is higher than street level.

[F]

That's also some thick paper.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You spent some money on this Mercedes.

[A]

Like did you go to the bathroom last night? And I was like, why are you asking me this? I was like, maybe. She goes, did you see flyers?

[B]

Where else can we find these flyers? In what other restaurants and public places?

[C]

I mean the day is young.

[A]

They're about to be in tartines, cyclops, GGs, Annie's car.

[B]

Now we're. This is very exciting news. Congratulations on the now this next bit of news isn't as exciting as your new listing but Ryan, do you have something to share with us today?

[A]

I do have something to share with everybody. Rebecca and I are pregnant. I've been given permission to say this and by the way this chumps keep secrets because this has been for a minute now and nobody has leaked. I don't believe so. Thank you.

[B]

Who's the father sadly?

[A]

Keon. Yeah.

[B]

So will you raise this baby as if it's your own.

[A]

Oh, yeah, I will. Yeah. Whoever this baby is, I will love it. Like sexual father.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, it's really shocking, but thank you. I mean, just thank you, everybody here. Like, thank you.

[E]

So exciting.

[C]

How far along are you?

[A]

Me or her? No, we're over the first trimester.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

How's her morning sickness?

[A]

Not great. I mean, she's. I mean, she's getting sick every.

[C]

Okay. Morning, noon and night.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, sometimes it lasts all day. Yeah.

[C]

It's going to go away. Tell her that it does dissipate in the second trimester.

[A]

That's what. Yeah, that's what they hear, is that it's supposed to actually get livable.

[C]

Right. Manageable. And it might even go all the way away.

[A]

Yeah, well, I'm genuinely about three and.

[B]

A half, four months.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

14 weeks.

[B]

Shit. We gotta start buying baby stuff.

[A]

This is the first. Yeah. We were talking last night, is this the first chump baby? And then we were saying Jackie Schimmel, probably.

[C]

Oh.

[A]

Yeah. But then Keyan was like, no, it's. So this might be a chump baby.

[B]

You should be doing. You should definitely do a baby shower because all the rich chumps, they'll buy everything on your registry.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Like, we'll announce it here on the radio. Yeah. We'll fill the whole registry.

[C]

No diapers for two days.

[B]

You want to buy anything?

[A]

Oh, no. What? What? Can. Can we vote on name ideas? Oh, of course. We're. We're going with Shinjin.

[B]

Shinjin Bailey.

[A]

Shinjin Bailey. Backup is Monroe. That's the second one. Yeah. But Shinjin, I think, is the winner at this point.

[B]

Did we. Did we say the sex?

[C]

No.

[B]

Do we know?

[A]

Yeah, we do know. Yeah.

[B]

Are we saying.

[A]

I mean, it's a. It's a baby girl. Yeah, it's a baby girl.

[B]

God, I hope she looks like Rebecca.

[A]

Wait, you know, to be honest. Same, Same.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The only thing I have is, like, I have decent blue eyes, but that's it. That's it.

[B]

You're right.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You're right. That's it.

[A]

Yeah, No, I. I'm fine with that. I've got a. I've got a heart of gold and a great personality.

[C]

Now, have you guys decided, like, who's going to be on Night Shift? Who's.

[A]

No, we have not voted on that yet.

[C]

Who's going to come in and wash the dishes and clean the house and make sure she doesn't have to lift a finger while she's being A mom.

[B]

We need to go fund.

[C]

Mercedes, Are you going to have a night nurse?

[A]

I. Mercedes. I don't know yet.

[C]

It's gonna be at least 45,000.

[B]

Mercedes, don't stress him out.

[C]

Well, you need to plan for these things. He's in the second trimester already.

[A]

Okay. Okay. Like, I'm literally sweaty right now.

[B]

I mean, Mercedes, ease in it.

[C]

You gotta. You've gotta be accountable so that we can.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

I'm not. Not accountable. What do you. I mean, I have not been. Not.

[E]

It's time to step up to the plate.

[B]

Right?

[A]

If you're gonna accept this baby as your own, you've got to. You got to do this.

[C]

Dead be dead. We're going to flashback to this show and make sure that you carry out all the promises.

[A]

Yeah. This will be used in court one day, this episode.

[B]

We need to do the baby shower. Like, when do we do the baby shower?

[A]

We're going to do the baby shower in January.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Now we're in September, I think. Yeah.

[B]

See, the thing is, is that we want to make sure you're all set up with everything you need long before the baby. I think we should do the shower sooner.

[A]

Right? Should we do a chump shower in addition to their shower? Yeah. Two showers. Yeah. Yeah. It'll be. That'll be fun.

[B]

I'm telling you, the chumps, they're gonna. They'll buy everything on the registry for you.

[C]

Absolutely.

[A]

Not necessarily. We're not asking.

[B]

No, but the listeners and the ch. Not the chump hosts. They're fucking cheap. But I'm talking about the listeners, actually. Mercedes is very generous.

[C]

Really quick. Thank you. Does she have her mom in town?

[A]

No, her mom's in New York.

[C]

Oh, that's not good.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

That's not good.

[A]

You know, and my mom is dead, so I don't think that would not.

[C]

Ouch. Double ouch. Who's gonna be. Who's gonna be there for her?

[B]

Yeah. Do you have an aunt? Do you have sisters?

[C]

What are we gonna do?

[B]

She can't do this on her own.

[C]

She's gonna come out of retirement.

[A]

Oh. So if we could get Zoila. Because that would. That. It's like working with a star.

[C]

I mean, you can't afford her. Forget it.

[B]

Seriously. He's not prepared.

[C]

No.

[E]

Guy, where are you going to live?

[A]

We have a place that we live in right now.

[B]

No. 837 Northwest. No, it's all one floor. Number 106, 639. Let's make an offer.

[E]

Streets for walking. The baby in the Stroller West Mall. Gorgeous neighborhood.

[B]

I bet a chump would buy this for you.

[A]

Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah, I'm sure.

[C]

It should be his crash pad because he's gonna be running. Run, running.

[B]

This is so great.

[A]

Oh, my. Run, run, running. Mercedes it is.

[C]

Lots of outdoor space. You could have a catch right outside those doors.

[A]

A catch. I'm gonna have a catch with.

[B]

Oh, my God. He could walk to the park. Catch him.

[D]

You don't even need a car.

[B]

What's that park behind the Abbey?

[C]

It's called West Hollywood Park.

[B]

You could walk to West Hollywood Park.

[A]

Seriously, it would be great to raise a baby at the Abbey. That would be. I mean, that is Three Men and a Baby Reboot. It would be amazing.

[B]

Yeah, I just keep looking at this.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You had this in your back pocket the whole time. And you sold. And you sold Shane a different condo, Literally.

[A]

Wow. We really moved on with that baby thing.

[B]

Oh, sorry, Ryan. Oh, I'm sorry. We got distracted.

[A]

It is a great deal, you guys.

[C]

You know, it's not a good deal.

[B]

To be fair.

[A]

I picked a bad day to do this. That's a really great deal.

[C]

But you know what's expensive?

[A]

What?

[C]

Babies.

[A]

Babies.

[B]

I bet you're gonna go to multiples on this.

[C]

Yeah, we're gonna be open this Sunday, too. Two to five.

[A]

No. Yeah. No, Jeff, not multiples. We're just doing the one baby. Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Are you gonna have twins?

[A]

No, no, no. Thank. No. Thank God.

[B]

You don't have a picture of the kitchen here, though. How's the kitchen?

[C]

Oh, I don't have a picture.

[A]

And you can see. Yeah.

[B]

Where's the kitchen?

[E]

Dining room.

[C]

Yeah, that's true.

[B]

Oh, I'm seeing a little. Little. How is the kitchen?

[C]

It's actually. It. It actually has the best quality hardwood cabinets. The. The appliances are all new. Every single appliance is new.

[A]

Mauricio, if you're listening, Mercedes is killing it right now. The agency, you guys.

[C]

I was just gonna say. Say that the cabinets are really good. Like, you need to replace the cabinets.

[A]

The valley doggy style is killing it right now.

[C]

No, the.

[E]

The kitchen is updated.

[A]

You don't need to.

[C]

Yeah, all the appliances are new. You don't need to. Yeah, maybe. Maybe people look at that color work.

[B]

We got to do a new countertops, but I don't. Yeah, you're right. The cabinets are good.

[C]

How'd you get that so quick? He pulled it up. He's a fan.

[B]

I feel like we should. You should go by there on Sunday and take a Look at it.

[E]

I'm out of money.

[C]

Yeah. There it is. There it is. Oh, go back.

[B]

Don't worry about something like that.

[C]

There it is.

[B]

It's a nice kitchen.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. It's our first baby. And, you know, you never know with these things. Like, you worry about the future, what the world's gonna be like, and, you know, it's. It's.

[B]

Where do you live now?

[A]

We live in the hills, like, right by Pache.

[B]

Oh, I love Pache, the salmon.

[A]

I have.

[B]

We have not had pache in a long time. I was telling Ty about it. I want to order. I want to. I keep forgetting.

[A]

I love that bedroom talk with Jeff is just like, what do you want to eat tomorrow? Ty, have you ever had pache?

[C]

Is he in town next.

[B]

Next weekend?

[C]

But you guys gonna go to Pache?

[B]

I don't like. I don't like eating at Pache because I feel like the tables are too close together. We'll get back to your baby. I feel like the tables are too close together. So I like to order. I like to order in and pick it up. No, I have them deliver it.

[A]

Well, Kean said you guys didn't go to the sandwich shop. You were talking about yesterday on the episode, you went to a different sandwich.

[B]

Well, the day before, we went to. What was it?

[A]

Paper pickles or potato chips and mammies.

[D]

And potato chips again, we went back.

[B]

To potato chips, which was delicious.

[A]

But Annie. Annie's getting tired of the sandwiches. Well, yeah, because it's making me fat.

[C]

You look.

[A]

Yeah. And by the way, if you get too fat, Jeff's done. Jeff's done with you, right? Shout out. Shout out to Michael at the food festival right now.

[B]

Poor Michael.

[C]

I like your jeans today a lot. He needs to link.

[A]

Can babies wear denim? Yeah.

[E]

Yeah, for sure.

[B]

Oh, don't buy a bunch of clothes.

[A]

We haven't.

[B]

No, no, no. Just do the onesies. Do the onesie. They're going to be in pajamas for a year.

[A]

Yeah, we. I was watching the first hour in there. Shane truly is on the struggle bus. Oh, like, you can. Like, you could even tell on video. Shane was just like, there.

[B]

I told him he should wear sunglasses today.

[E]

I literally could use them.

[A]

He's, like, damp.

[B]

I don't know. You know, you. We have a long day today.

[E]

I know.

[B]

So. Okay, so he's putting on Mercedes glasses. What are those?

[A]

Oh, that's better.

[B]

They don't look bad on you.

[A]

For the listeners at home, he put on Mercedes sunglasses.

[E]

That's better.

[C]

Not just any glasses. They're Prada.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

So how old would the baby be in January for eight months.

[C]

The due date?

[A]

It'll be in March.

[C]

Oh, you're gonna have an Aries baby.

[A]

I think it's gonna be Jeff, Jeff's birthday. Jeff's birthday.

[B]

Better hope the baby comes early. I think you want a Pisces baby.

[C]

Why? Aries is great.

[B]

Both my brothers are Pisces and they're so easy. I'm the most difficult.

[A]

Yeah, no, definitely. But isn't. Wait, is it you you share a birthday with? Oh, it's Jameson.

[F]

Yeah, I'm also a left handed Aries.

[B]

Yeah, you don't want that.

[F]

No, no. That baby's gonna come out with a clipboard and poor Rebecca's gonna be in.

[A]

Pain and also, I mean, horrible stomach issues too. Yeah. Oh, by the way, I want to apologize. I'm the one that started that prostate conversation today because I asked, I was like, do you guys get up and go to the bathroom a bunch at night?

[B]

Yeah. Thanks a lot.

[A]

That's happening a lot. And then Rick ran with it and started.

[B]

Well, I ran with it.

[A]

Well, talking about Calis then, and, and you know, like I'm supposed to take Calis now, so I don't pee at night. Yeah, that's what Rick said.

[B]

There's also some other benefits to it.

[C]

Erection. It's.

[B]

Yeah. Stronger erections.

[A]

Yeah, that's in the green room. Rick was like, I, I, it's rock hard.

[B]

It's rock.

[A]

It's rock hard.

[E]

So rock.

[A]

And Kelly was like, yeah, it is. It's right in my back. Wow.

[C]

Isn't it better than.

[A]

Oh, great. Callers are asking about the condo.

[B]

Lisa California. Hi, Lisa.

[D]

Okay, Mercedes. Hey, Mercedes. How close to the entrance of that parking garage is it? Above? Because I had a friend who was above the parking garage and if you're anywhere near the entrance, you get all the fumes.

[C]

Not anywhere near the.

[D]

And you can't open, you can't open your windows, you can't open your fine glass door or all the fumes. Command.

[A]

There's only been two carbon monoxide poisonings at this point.

[B]

But Lisa, that's a very good question. And what about. Do you hear the gate opening and closing from the unit?

[C]

No, no, the, the unit is not above the parking garage in the sense that you're asking. What I was saying is that the garage is the street level, so the whole first floor is above the ground level.

[B]

But I guess Lisa was concerned because it sounds like she's interested.

[C]

Yeah, right.

[B]

Lisa, are you going to make an offer.

[C]

Hi, Lisa. It's not above the garage door. You will not hear it opening and closing.

[B]

Is there central air conditioning?

[C]

Split system, split seats.

[A]

Lisa, could we get the last four of your social and credit card number?

[B]

Yeah, we're going to run your credit. Lisa, hold on. Oscar's going to get your Social Security number, and then we're going to need proof of funds today.

[A]

If you get an email from Patrick and Paul, don't answer it. Yeah.

[B]

Thank you for calling, Lisa. Oh, Corinne in North Carolina. You're gonna have to.

[A]

Oh, yeah. This is good for me, actually. Yeah.

[B]

Hi, Corinne. What happened to her?

[A]

Corinne?

[B]

What happened to Corinne?

[A]

Oh, I kind of hear her, but she's cutting in and out.

[E]

Cor.

[B]

Okay, you'll figure that out. You know what, Ryan?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I was thinking about your, you know, your awkward hugs and last night, and I noted that when I went over to hug you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You were a little worried because you were afraid that I was going to then shame you on the roo radio today.

[A]

I don't know if that was the exact thought process. What I saw, though, I turned. You were like, hey, Ryan. And you. Then you turned to Reza and you like. And you're like, no, it's not about you. That's what you did.

[B]

Oh, I'm sorry. It wasn't about you.

[A]

Okay. Because I was like that. That seemed like it was about me, so I was like, oh, thanks, Jeff.

[B]

Oh, it was about the 32 Flavors payment schedule, and I was asking Reza about it. I heard. What a nightmare. You. Yes.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Wow.

[C]

Because I did notice that he was visibly upset.

[B]

Oh, my God. It wasn't about you at all.

[A]

Wait, I wasn't. Mercedes always acts like she can see some sort of emotion on me. What are you talking about?

[B]

Oh, but I was going to tell you about the hug. I do a half hug. Have you noticed my half hugs?

[A]

Yeah, See? And I.

[C]

Me, too.

[A]

Last time I was here, you did a handshake with me. Because the time before I did a hug.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And so I was like, yeah, I'm not at that place with Jeff yet where I can get even a half hug.

[B]

No, I'll give you a half hug, but we're not doing a full hug. I don't really do full hugs. Doug gave me a full hug last night, and I don't like full hugs.

[A]

But I feel like you need a full hug, Doug.

[B]

It was a long full hug. It was a long, full hug.

[A]

It lingered.

[B]

It did linger.

[E]

Did you give Oscar a half or a whole?

[B]

I Probably gave you a half hug. No, you gave me a whole hug.

[A]

No, no, he was wasted.

[B]

I don't do full hugs. I just don't. Well, okay, maybe it must have been half.

[A]

Cause you had a drink in your hand, so.

[B]

Yeah, so it was a half hug. And then I also just kissed, like, girls, one side. One side. I don't do double. That's too much.

[E]

That's European.

[C]

I do a bony shoulder. It's like a shoulder block. So you don't really have to hug the person.

[B]

I love your bony shoulder.

[C]

Yeah. You just lean in with the bony shoulder.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

And you let the joy show in your face that you want to see the person.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Wait, Mercedes said last night. And I want to know more about this. Why do you think hugs are a scam?

[C]

So if somebody hugs you, they might be scamming you. Hugs are. Hugs are lazy. If you don't want to be nice to that person for the rest of the night, just give them a warm fake hug at the beginning of the night. And then for the rest of the night, you. You're not going to be perceived as mean or cold.

[B]

You're right.

[A]

Don't encourage this, Jeff.

[B]

You're right. What about a half hug?

[A]

That's real.

[C]

Whatever. You're just keeping it real. Like, you just want to let somebody know where they stand. No, you want to trick them into thinking they are, you know, important to me. Yes.

[A]

She's making this up as she goes.

[C]

Just go, hi. And a full hug the rest of the night. You could be a cold bitch.

[A]

You did that with everybody last night. Mercedes.

[E]

Cold bitch.

[A]

By the way.

[C]

Who?

[A]

Jackie. Like, I. I was like, oh, I'll take whatever. Jackie's out. Jackie drinks turpentine. It was, like, straight. It was like a vodka martini with just the vodka. Yeah.

[E]

That is what she drinks.

[A]

And blue cheese olives.

[C]

Yeah, you guys are the same with that. I like that.

[A]

Jeff, where'd you go? Are you okay? I don't like it.

[C]

Did she drive?

[B]

I'm thinking about this whole hug thing. See, that's. What's. When you hugged the manager at Larson's.

[A]

I thought that was.

[B]

That was a full hug. You should never do a full hug to anyone unless you're like, okay, Rebecca.

[A]

Yep. Okay, listen, we've already established I'm awkward. I thought we were in a group of all of our friends, and sometimes I forget who people are. And she was right up. So I thought it was one of our group. And I had probably met this person before, so I was like, hey, And I was trying to be inclusive of everybody.

[B]

I'm sorry. Now I'm worried that Shinjin is going to be awkward like you.

[A]

You know what? I actually, I. I do worry. I do worry about that as well.

[B]

God, I hope she's. Yes. I hope she's a little.

[C]

The Rebecca side.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

That Rebecca.

[F]

It irks me when people. When you go to kiss someone on the cheek, but they, like, give you their cheek as if they're not kissing you back, you're just kissing them like they're the queen Mercedes.

[B]

I don't mind doing that with women.

[A]

Wait, what's the rules on the kiss on the cheek? Is there rules on that? Is that a scam?

[C]

I do that. I think. Otherwise you might be kissing each other on the lips.

[B]

Annie, what do you think about the kiss on the cheek versus the bony shoulder versus the full hugs?

[A]

I don't like getting close to people because people smell great. Point. Annie.

[C]

Last night, nobody smells good.

[B]

Okay, well, let me. Let me ask you this. Who last night smelled good? Do you.

[A]

Do you recall Keon and Shane always smell good?

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Thank you, Keen.

[B]

You do always smell good. You have good colognes.

[E]

He does.

[C]

Ronnie smelled really good.

[A]

Ronnie did smell good.

[B]

Ronnie did smell good.

[C]

Like, shower fresh.

[B]

Yeah. I need to start. I showered last night. I need to. Sometimes I'll go out without shower.

[C]

Put any cologne on it.

[B]

I don't think I don't put enough on. I do it every day, but I don't put enough.

[A]

But you're not supposed to put. I mean, I've noticed that a lot hiking lately is that I'll pass a woman that is just like fully perfumed out.

[E]

She didn't shower.

[F]

One of my very big pet peeves is when someone hugs me and then I smell like them because I like their smell. But I. It's not my smell. I don't want to smell like you.

[C]

That's a lot.

[E]

You smell like you.

[F]

Yeah, but I also don't put a lot of cologne on. And I was like, maybe I should put on. I don't know.

[B]

Did anyone else do any weird hugs besides Doug?

[C]

Oh, Doug did a staring thing too.

[B]

What was that?

[C]

He said, I need to look at you in your eyes. And I.

[B]

He's intense.

[C]

Yeah. And I was like, okay.

[B]

He was one of the first.

[E]

He was in a. An intense mood because he had just said goodbye to Sal.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So he's needy.

[E]

He was sending.

[B]

He's. Okay. He's being needy because, you know, Sal is his bestie.

[E]

Bestie.

[B]

Where'd he go Italy or something? Right.

[F]

We're gonna be. We're gonna have to be really gentle with Doug in the next couple months.

[B]

No, not months.

[F]

Him and Sal talk all day, every day.

[D]

Why?

[A]

Did he move? Yeah, he was talking about that last week.

[F]

He got citizenship in Italy and he's gonna go and have another part of his life there.

[C]

No way. What's he gonna do for a living?

[F]

Teach English.

[C]

Oh, okay.

[F]

So we're gonna have to be kind to Doug because he's going through a transition here.

[B]

I feel like we're always kind to Doug.

[A]

Yeah. You've been great. Not you, Jeff. Everybody else.

[C]

We should do like a sleepover for him. Him? No, we can make him baby shower.

[A]

Doug would actually kill him.

[B]

Rebecca should recruit him to help plant. That is a nice.

[A]

He would be a great a manny. Like a Mr. Belvedere. Straights on the china. Never met him before. Who? That's the song from Mr. Bel.

[B]

I figured. I just. I just wish he weren't. Wouldn't sing it.

[A]

I don't know. That.

[B]

Doug would be a great man.

[A]

He really would.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

My kid loves him.

[A]

I thought you said Monroe makes fun of him.

[E]

That's how she shows love.

[A]

Just like it's like her father.

[B]

Yes, exactly. But she really likes him. She thinks he's a character. I mean, it's. He is.

[A]

He is.

[B]

That's why I kind of like.

[A]

But in the best way.

[C]

What you got going on over there?

[B]

Okay, so I've got. I got some fresh bullet ice.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

And then I'm going to finish the rest of my Celsius, which I'm feeling. I'm coming back to life.

[E]

I'm going to make a coffee in the break.

[B]

Why don't you do a Celsius?

[A]

Are we on the tail end of the Celsius fever? Because it really has seemed to cheer you up in the last three weeks.

[B]

It's the best thing that's ever happened to me.

[C]

Okay.

[E]

Should I do a Celsius?

[B]

Yes, do a Celsius. Because we have to go to Malibu and the Palisades. I know.

[A]

Are you guys filming?

[B]

It's a Trek money. No, no. We can't even agree on a payment structure.

[C]

Oh, shit.

[A]

Wait. I have a question about oc.

[B]

I gotta tell you real quick. And we'll go to O.C.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I've been going back and forth over this like the deal's done. Oh, am I allowed to say this? Anyway, the deal's done. I just need to figure out the payment structure. And it's a little inequitable. So I've been going back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And then I got a call this morning from Andy, and so he's like, hey, can we talk today? Like, fuck. I hate when people get him involved. He doesn't need to be involved. This is a business affairs issue.

[C]

I hope it has nothing to do with that.

[B]

No, it does. No, it does, because. Hold on, let me read it. No, he gets mad when I read the text.

[C]

Yeah, let's not.

[B]

I want. Oh, he says, I want to understand your POV on this. Oh, why are they getting him involved?

[E]

Because they need you to close it.

[B]

Well, let's figure out. I mean, real close. Figure it out.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Anyway, it's not. That's not fair. It's not good.

[B]

Not good when they involve.

[C]

You need to get. You need to get what you need.

[B]

I'm getting what I need.

[A]

It's good.

[B]

It's just. Let's just figure out. Right.

[C]

Or else just.

[B]

Here's. This is the way I feel. I don't offer. I'm not. I'm. You're not going to get Jeff Lewis on layaway. I don't offer financing.

[A]

There's no Klarna.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

So you're already getting. You're already getting me at a discount, so.

[A]

But we got to wrap this up before Bravo con.

[B]

I know. I. There's some sort of rush. There is some sort of rush.

[A]

And now we're back, so.

[B]

And then. Yeah. Is that what it's called?

[A]

Well, that. I mean, allegedly. That's what I think you said on the radio last week.

[B]

Oh, I'm not supposed to talk about that.

[A]

No, I know. That's what. I was shocked when you said it, but it's.

[B]

And it back.

[A]

Yeah. No, I had a question for Shane, though, because you guys said you were talking to Alex and, you know, probably talking about your show, but you started talking about OC Always.

[B]

Always. Because it gets heated and then I change the subject and talk about what are we going to do about Real Housewives of Orange County. So we've. We're very. Shane and I are very invested right now.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

But the. The part I want to know that you haven't talked about is what is Alex's reaction to these thoughts?

[E]

He keeps his cards close to his face.

[A]

He really does.

[B]

He should. But what Jen Levy said is he's thinking about something like that.

[A]

Well, you would have to imagine for the 20th. 20th season, because I'd be great. You can't break everything up at this point. So that's what I'm curious about. Katie Janela of it all. Because it's a reboot.

[B]

In essence, it's a reboot, but not.

[A]

With an All Star season. You know, like, do the All Star season and then start from scratch. I think if Katie was In, like, the 17th season right now, you definitely put her back.

[B]

Here's the thing. If they bring all those OGs back, we're in. We're going to be in. We're going to. They can just keep going. They just keep them. Keep them.

[A]

But. But you were just talking about payment schedule. That's These. Some of these ladies. It's a hefty payment, I would imagine everybody.

[B]

But if they're gone and they come back, they're gonna get. They're gonna. They'll give them a pay cut.

[A]

Yeah. Well, you're gonna ask Vicki about this on Monday, because she'll be in here.

[C]

Vicky coming.

[B]

Vicky, Vicki's coming Monday. Yeah.

[C]

So do you guys like Katie?

[B]

Here's the thing. Personally, I liked her personally, but I.

[A]

Think it's like what happens is when everybody doesn't want to film with somebody else, you just make that person more powerful. So Katie in the off season is, you know, her not being in these last couple of episodes is kind of making people like her and want to see her side more. So when you go against somebody or don't want to film with somebody, it always benefits the person that they don't want to film with, in my opinion.

[B]

I'm so bored with this storyline that that's why I want to reboot.

[A]

The Tamara Shannon of it all is like, that's going to be until the end of time.

[C]

Did you guys see the New York. The new New York cast?

[A]

Oh, the reboot of the reboot.

[B]

I saw it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

The reboot of the reboot.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

It's not official. No.

[E]

And they're doing.

[B]

But I like Aaron. I like Psy. I love Psy, actually.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I hope we see more of I like Jess because I got to know her outside of the show.

[C]

Yeah, I like all of them. Bryn took a break, obviously. We knew that was gonna happen.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

But they're doing the Summer House alum.

[A]

Yeah, they're doing in the City is, I think the working title of that. Or Kyle. Kyle.

[E]

I would be surprised if they brought back Roni quickly because if they're doing Next Gen and the Summer House in the City show, I feel like that's a lot of New York young person.

[A]

There's gonna be tons of announcements At Bravocon, we're gonna get all of this. We're gonna find out what happens with Jersey. We're going to find out what happens with Miami with Teresa.

[B]

Jessica, by the way, line one has a real good suggestion for you. Connie. Hi, Jessica.

[D]

All right, everybody. Hi, guys. Okay, shout out. Shane. Sorry, real quick. Okay, so I'm not listening to today's episode or roadshipping the Mammoth, and I'm listening to yesterday's episode. But anyways, about the clipboard. Connie with the clipboard. Okay, so you call him a gay with the clipboard.

[B]

Yep.

[D]

Solution for the pens. Okay, so get the clipboards with the pen attached to the clipboard.

[B]

Totally makes sense.

[D]

Boom.

[B]

Yep. You're right. You're right.

[D]

It took me several episodes to get to this point, but I finally did, and I was like, I'm not working. I'm driving to Mammoth. I have to call it.

[B]

So you know what, Jessica?

[D]

Today you have.

[B]

You have come up with the perfect solution. Also, are you interested at all in 837 Northwest Knoll, unit 106?

[A]

Also, Jessica, I see you're in Los Angeles. If there's any babysitting that you could potentially do, that would be amazing.

[B]

Open house on Sunday, 2 to 5.

[C]

Yes. Also, where are you gonna.

[A]

Oh, my God, guys.

[C]

What is she gonna do in Mammoth?

[A]

Jessica, do you do bony hug?

[D]

What are we doing?

[C]

What are you gonna do? In a minute.

[D]

There's a trail fest we're running. We're doing a trail run. So we did it last year. We're doing it again. I know. Sorry, guys. Actors. I'm so sorry.

[A]

Imagine Shane having to do a trail hike right now.

[B]

I would. So I.

[C]

Sounds very skinny.

[B]

Well, Jessica, I think we should. Can you do that? Can we get two clipboards?

[F]

Thanks, Jessica.

[D]

I love you, Jameson. I've seen Jameson.

[A]

I know, I know.

[C]

No, thanks.

[D]

Great suggestion, Jameson.

[F]

Thank you.

[B]

Great suggestion. That's what you should do.

[A]

Oscar's in the corner when I run these things.

[B]

How have we never thought of that?

[F]

I guess it's just something else for me to carry, and I don't maybe want it.

[B]

Leave it here.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, by the way, we framed our proclamation from city of West Hollywood. We want to hang it.

[F]

Great.

[A]

Oh, you're gonna hang it over that.

[B]

Fat face of mine? Just put it right over the picture.

[F]

I will give it to you.

[B]

Thank you, Jessica. Love you.

[F]

Charge of that.

[A]

The biggest propaganda here is that we painted Jeff as a fat person, and that's just not true. That is beautiful, Shane.

[B]

In that picture, I am new York this is insane. All right. I have to go to the bathroom really bad.

[A]

Of course my prostate. Yeah.

[B]

What?

[C]

Oh my God. It's already halfway of the show has gone and we haven't even done one break.

[B]

Mercedes oh Wes Noll, what's the most important thing we've been talking about today?

[A]

It's the new listing. I hope my baby's ignored like I am.

[B]

If you're not buying single ply toilet paper for yourself, why are you giving your cat outdated cat litter? Make their bathroom experience better for both of you. With Pretty Litter, it's soft on their paws, stays fresher longer, and it's easy to maintain. Pretty Litter also helps monitor your cat's health, testing acidity and alkalinity levels and the visible presence of blood in your cat's urine. You know how much my animals mean to me and as they get older I love being able to get ahead of potential health issues. Plus I love that Pretty Litter is lightweight and ships right to my door. Its non clumping formula traps odor and it keeps my home smelling great right now. Save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy at prettylitter.com jeff that's prettylitter.com jeff to save 20% on your first order and Get a free cat toy. Prettylitter.com jeff pretty litter cannot detect every feline health issue or prevent or diagnose diseases. A diagnosis can only come from a licensed veterinarian. Terms and conditions apply. See site for details. If you're still overpaying for wireless, it's time to say yes to saying no. At Mint Mobile. Their favorite word is no. No contracts, no monthly bills, no overages, no hidden fees, no bs. Here's why you should say yes to making the switch and getting Premium Wireless. For $15 a month, you can ditch overpriced wireless and their jaw dropping monthly bills, unexpected overages and hidden fees. Plans start at $15 a month at Mint. All plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. Use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all your existing contacts. Ready to say yes to saying no? Make the [e-mail] jefflewis that's mintmobile.com JeffLewis Upfront payment of $45 required, equivalent to $15 a month Limited time new customer offer for first three months only. Speeds may slow above 35 GB on unlimited plans. Taxes and fees extra. See Mint Mobile for details. Pumpkin Spice season is here, which means kids are already eyeing the candy aisles. It's time to stock up at Thrive Market where you can find healthier swaps or their favorite treats without the sugar crash. Thrive Market makes it simple to keep things festive and healthy this season. With over 1000 ingredients restricted, every snack, pantry, staple or treat you add to your cart is something you can feel good about. And those on site filters are a game changer. For fall candy season. You can click no Seed Oils or Low Sugar and instantly find better versions of your kids favorites, whether it's cookies for their lunchbox or healthier hot cocoa for chilly nights. In the last year I've made some swaps to healthier versions of beef jerky, popcorn and potato chips. I love to snack and Thrive Market is helping me make better choices. Go to Thrivemarket.com jeff to get 30% off your first order and a free $60 gift. That's Thrivemarket.com jeff To get 30% off your first order AND a free $60 gift. Feeling better in your body shouldn't be a full time job. Hers makes it easier to get started with affordable weight loss treatment plans. If prescribed, you get medication as a part of a doctor developed weight loss program complete with ongoing care check ins, dosage and medication adjustments and 247 on online support at no additional cost. There's no hidden fees and no membership fees with oral medication kits starting at just $69 per month with a 10 month plan when paid up front. All paired with a program designed by weight loss experts to help build healthy habits related to diet and exercise. Whether you want to lose weight, grow thicker, fuller hair or find relief for anxiety, hers has you covered. Visit forhers.com issues to get a personalized affordable plan that gets you that's f o r h e forhers.com issues weight loss by hers is not available everywhere. Compounded products are not approved or reviewed for safety, effectiveness or quality by the fda. Prescription required. See website for full details, important safety information and restrictions. Actual price depends on product and plan purchased. We put flyers of 837 North Knoll, West Knoll. We put them in the bathroom for you.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

Yeah, so there's no toilet paper left. You got it.

[C]

So what happened?

[E]

I don't like cherry cola Celsius.

[C]

I do.

[E]

I'm just gonna come out and say it.

[A]

Whoa.

[B]

Oh, are you serious?

[A]

What if this is the fight that breaks you two up like.

[B]

I I honestly could think it's because you're hungover. Now we're gonna so look, I think we gotta do something different for lunch today.

[C]

Like what?

[B]

I think we have to do hangover food. I think we have to do like Denny's. Carl's Jr. In n out.

[E]

Carl's.

[A]

I love. Wait, why are you screaming? Why are you screaming?

[D]

That's what I was thinking.

[A]

Oh, because after you. Earrings, buns.

[E]

No, the T is you get the crisscross fries at Carl's.

[A]

Crisscross.

[E]

And they make them fresh.

[A]

You know, we should do Jameson Tarzan now. Jameson, please.

[E]

Wait, why?

[A]

Why Tarzan?

[B]

We can get off the freeway on the way to Malibu. Jump over to Carl's Jr. Get back on the freeway, eat in the car.

[A]

Yeah, but don't you want to eat food when you're at home in bed naked?

[B]

What?

[A]

Like when you're comfortable, you know, like.

[B]

You'Re naked in bed eating, right?

[A]

Not fully naked, but like in like your bed clothes, you know? Don't you want to eat when you're like, not going to do something?

[B]

Newsmax 2, it's time for dinner. Shinjin, take off your clothes and get in bed.

[A]

Put your dinner slop on. Shinjin dinner slop time. Had a little. Had a little. Podcaster Z.

[B]

I'm so worried about it.

[A]

Yeah, but you're gonna have Carl's Jr. And then go on a job site on Malibu. You're gonna be gassy, Jeff.

[B]

No, I'm not.

[C]

They're not gonna get home until like 8 o' clock at night. They can't wait till they go home.

[E]

I think you're right. We take the 101 through the valley. We can get off. Tampa has a Carl's Jr. Yep.

[B]

We get off at Tampa. We go to Carl's Jr. Yeah, we. We. We grab. Do you want to eat there? Do you want to just put in the car?

[E]

I like to sit and eat.

[C]

Yeah, just sit.

[B]

Problem is we have a one. We have. Don't we have a one thirty?

[E]

We have a twelve thirty.

[B]

Shit.

[A]

Thanks, Jameson, for this.

[B]

Let's take line one, Lisa and Palm Desert.

[A]

This is so mean. Hi, Lisa.

[D]

Hi.

[A]

Hey.

[D]

First. First, I want to say I'm a fan of yours, Ryan. I listened to you way before you were on Jeff. And I'm really happy that you've been embraced by the chump. But I was just wondering if you're the poor chump.

[B]

Broke ass.

[A]

More porridge, Jeff, please. It's a crazy. That's a great question. I don't. You know what? I haven't really compared bank accounts, but I will say, Lisa, in all honesty, when you do go to these Events. There isn't a. Not a. There's an awareness by me when they're talking about like brands and things like this that I'm like, oh, you know, I live a little bit of a different, you know, not a. Like a middle class lifestyle.

[C]

So hopefully one day or you could afford to drive a better car.

[A]

I could, yes.

[B]

Maybe one with a bumper.

[C]

Is that your car?

[B]

Yeah. It has no bumper.

[A]

Because I told. I told the.

[C]

Paul, that's ridiculous. There's no excuse. You should. You know what I think, Lisa? I think that he is playing it up that he does make a lot of money. He actually told us how much. It's a lot.

[A]

What are you talking about, Mercedes? I've never told you.

[B]

I have an idea, Lisa. So I have an idea of what he makes and it's a respectable living. Like, he's not.

[A]

Yeah, I think I make a respectable living.

[B]

Like guess, Lisa. And I'll tell you. Higher level Lisa. Guess.

[A]

Guys, fan socials are great this time of year.

[B]

Guess.

[D]

A hundred thousand.

[B]

Higher.

[C]

More.

[D]

Really?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

She shot a lot more.

[A]

Not a lot. No, Not a lot more. No.

[D]

200 warmer.

[A]

No. I can tell you no.

[C]

Okay.

[E]

The point is I need to raise a baby.

[C]

You can get a better car.

[B]

No, just get a bumper.

[A]

I have the bumper there. I just have to take it to the place to put the bumper back on. This car is sensible, though. Like, it's a good car. Yes.

[E]

New.

[B]

I actually like the car. I know I'd like it better if it had bumper and you need to tint the windows for your baby. What kind of car is it?

[A]

It's a Camry.

[B]

It's a very. It's a very safe car. A solid car. I actually think it looks good again. You just got to fix the back. What happened?

[A]

I told you. I was driving back from Arizona and then all of a sudden, by the time, like I went straight through, I was listening to an audiobook and by the time I pulled in, the bumper was like fully, like just hanging by a thread. So I don't know where that happened. I stopped for gas and Blythe and everything was fine. And then by the time and Rebecca's like, did you hit somebody? And I was like, no, I didn't. I don't think I hit anybody.

[B]

So you think someone hit you when you stop?

[A]

I have no clue.

[B]

Did you stop to eat?

[A]

No, I don't eat on the road. No. I wait till naked and you're right.

[B]

I'm just wondering because I don't think you. Someone probably hit you in the parking lot.

[C]

Car I'm thinking of may not be your car.

[B]

He got a new one. He used to have a terrible.

[A]

Thank you, Lisa.

[E]

He had a Corolla.

[B]

Thank you.

[E]

Upgraded to the Cam.

[A]

Yeah, I did upgrade to a Camry. I. I treated.

[B]

And it's a nice car.

[A]

Yeah, it's fine.

[B]

You know what I like is the Honda Accord. But that's expensive.

[E]

Think that they're so cute, the Honda Accord.

[B]

I do, too. I like it.

[A]

Wait, who was just talking about cars and test driving? Was it on this show?

[E]

About it every day.

[C]

Yeah, us.

[A]

Because we got Jamison. A new car.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Dug a new roof, and now I just need a baby.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So did you pick up the bumper and put it in the back seat?

[A]

No, because I had pulled in and the bumper was literally hanging off. So then I pulled it off and I. It's in the garage. Need a body shop. Yeah. Need a body shop.

[B]

And you realize how bad it looks. Like you need to go and get that fit.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But it's. It's kind of classic me. Like, I turn everything to. In some way. Like, it's like. Or even, you know, like, I. It's. I get very upset.

[C]

Not those jeans, honey. Those look really good on you.

[A]

Thanks, girlfriend. More.

[B]

I think about it. I don't think that baby's yours. I just don't. I don't.

[E]

Why?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

They just got engaged.

[C]

We'll find out in 20 weeks. 30 weeks.

[A]

I've been trying to get Jeff's sample for the last year. Finally worked. Oh, no. Oh, that did sound bad. I'm sorry, you guys.

[B]

Oh, Margaret. Margaret. Los Angeles.

[A]

Oh, God. Hey, Margaret.

[D]

Hi, guys. Hi. California Fried Seafood Kitchen is your newest ghost kitchen that opened up in la. You should eat your hangover food there.

[B]

Okay, somebody write this down. What is this? Say it again.

[D]

California Fried Seafood Kitchen.

[B]

California Fried seafood kitchen.

[D]

It's LA's newest ghost kitchen. Yes. We have.

[B]

Annie, do you know anything about this?

[A]

Do they have baby food?

[D]

My new restaurant.

[E]

Congratulations.

[A]

Baby food.

[B]

Oh, it's your restaurant.

[A]

Oh, Margaret, congratulations.

[E]

Oh, my God. It looks delicious. Actually.

[C]

Is ghost chicken a term for, like, ghost chicken?

[A]

Ghost kitchen. Mercedes ghost kitchen. Like, if it's not like, you can't go into the restaurant and eat it.

[C]

And they just, like, take out and stuff, Right? It's on the app or like. That's what I thought.

[B]

That's like, goop. Oh, Jeff.

[E]

Hot dogs.

[A]

She said you'll hook you up for free.

[E]

I need to come for a lobster Roll.

[C]

Oh, my gosh.

[A]

They deliver for Postmate? Yes.

[B]

Okay, how close is it to our house?

[A]

I don't know. Chumps go to ghost chicken right now.

[E]

Kitchen California.

[A]

There's only one.

[B]

There's only one review. It is five stars. She just opened it. Fucker. Don't be so rude.

[A]

He and. Geez, what a jerk.

[D]

We also own Neptune's net, so you can go.

[A]

Oh my God. Neptune's there. That's going there.

[B]

I'm over there today.

[A]

That's where Jax Taylor got engaged to Brittany.

[B]

It's in Sawtelle.

[D]

I was there.

[A]

You were there when they filmed that classic episode?

[D]

Yes, My family owned it. I met Jeff at the. Godfrey and Shane. Remember me?

[A]

Oh, yeah. Yes.

[C]

Remember? Wait, so Neptune's. Neptune stayed up, right? It was the.

[B]

Didn't burn.

[C]

Something's fishy. Is the one that's.

[D]

We did not burn.

[C]

Thank God. Thank God, thank God.

[B]

Thank God.

[D]

Blessings because you were forced us.

[B]

You know, we could go to Neptune's. Not today, but we could go in there for lunch too. Because we're so limited now because of all the, you know, the fires and everything. We have Chipotle and Jack in the Box.

[A]

Are you working on a house that was fire damaged?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

What I'm putting. You're saying there. You're limited because.

[B]

Yeah, so when we get that. That's why we have to go to. We have to exit Tampa today off the 101 and go to Carl's Jr because there's no restaurants in Malibu and I mean, there's a few in the Palisades. There's nothing.

[C]

There used to be an islands.

[B]

Thank you. Thank you, Margaret. What? Where was the islands?

[C]

Right on Canaan. Right on your way.

[B]

What happened to it?

[C]

Closed it.

[A]

I gave you a gift card to Denny's. Did you ever use it?

[B]

No.

[E]

Literally. Yes. The next day.

[B]

Yeah, I used the next day. No, I did because they have a Senior citizen menu.

[E]

55 and over.

[B]

55 and over. And I love the iced tea there. Yeah, it's delicious. Corinne in North Carolina. Oh, Corrine, you're back.

[D]

Yes, I'm here.

[B]

Are you calling about Mercedes listing? Her new listing?

[D]

No, I was calling about Monroe and wanting to be on Roblox and the creepy men that are on there.

[B]

Yeah. What should I say to her? No.

[D]

Okay. Well, so. Well, no, I think it's totally your choice whether or not you want to let her on there. But I'm a therapist. I'm a licensed clinical social worker, which is really just kind of like A long and maybe fancy title for a therapist. And we always teach our clients, our parents, that eight is too late. So by the age of eight, you really should be talking to them about, like, body autonomy and Internet safety and those types of things. So you really should be starting to have those conversations with her unknown caller about body automatic Internet safety.

[B]

What are you saying?

[A]

Body autonomy, autonomy.

[B]

What's that mean?

[A]

Body optomety.

[B]

What does that mean?

[A]

Yes, Corinne, can you explain that to Jeff? What body autonomy is?

[B]

Oh, her body.

[D]

Okay, so it's her body. Her body belongs to her. So if someone wants to hug her or, you know, she can say no, and she doesn't need to feel guilty about that, you know, and that, you know, it. It's basically consent. You know, is she. If. If someone wants to hug her, touch her, whatever.

[B]

No, I'm gonna teach her about the half hug.

[A]

The bony. The bony shoulder.

[B]

Oh, Mercedes, we should also. The bony shoulder.

[C]

The bone in. Yeah, bone in. Pop your shoulder. You won't get any makeup on their collar. That's also another concern.

[B]

Oh, it's makeup.

[C]

Get your. Yeah. Your chin and your foundation on somebody else's. Nice white shirt.

[A]

Jeff's taught her about larger people, how to behave.

[B]

All right, thank you, Corinne. Appreciate your time.

[D]

I'm not a hugger at all, so.

[B]

Yeah, okay, so you're not a hugger either. Okay.

[C]

Oh, you guys.

[B]

I know. Can I. Oh, but just tell her. Tell her to stay on hold because I gotta. I gotta take a break right now.

[C]

I also wanna promote that today on IG Live for the Heal to Feel page and mine, they're gonna have Shinka, the medium. So anybody who wants a free reading live on the air for free can go to the Heal to Feel page and catch the IG Live that Shinka and Liotte are gonna do from Heel to Feel.

[E]

What time?

[B]

At 2pm okay, today, thanks to Celsius, I am up. I have energy. I do want to promote Liquid Cialis. I do want to promote Chump Miss. Our third annual Chump Miss. It's in December. We've added a second show on December 9th. It's in Orange county at the Brea Improv. For tickets, you just go to improv.com brea and again, the VIP tickets now are starting to sell since we changed the verbiage because the $150 includes your ticket plus a meet and greet after the show.

[C]

Cool.

[B]

And I will eventually. I haven't decided who's doing the shows yet.

[A]

That's what I was talking to Sarah Is it gonna be like a Hunger Games kind of thing? Is there, like, an audition to audition for Chumpmas?

[E]

We should audition the chumps. That's such a funny idea.

[C]

So smart.

[B]

That is a good idea. I mean, I was gonna do, like, a lotto, but I do like the idea.

[A]

That's also a solid idea.

[B]

I do like the idea of. Of auditions.

[E]

Break out your tap shoes, Doug, by the way.

[A]

No, if you did it like that, Doug would crush it.

[F]

We could ask Becky Robinson on Tuesday because she auditioned all those strippers for. For Tulum. Tulum.

[A]

I don't think we're going to be stripping.

[B]

I don't know. Never say never.

[A]

Patrick and Paul, Shout out. Stand on your feet, everybody. Pola 2.

[B]

Now, is it true that. That Doug had recommended a massage place for you and you went and got a nice Thai massage recently?

[A]

Doug. I believe Doug was the one that said, get a Thai massage, but Rebecca was the one that boyfriend T recommended, recommended the. The facility. So I got. I've been having some. I've been working out with my trainer, and I've been having some back problems and neck problems. So she was like, you gotta go. And I went, and it was right across from Whole Foods on Santa Monica and Fairfax. And it was. It's. There's not a, like, steam room or something. You just, like, get in the room. They tell you to disrobe, like, fully nude and then get under the. The. The. The. You know, the sheet. Yeah.

[C]

Man or woman?

[B]

He requested a man.

[A]

I know. No, Keon, I did not request a man. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I. Yes, because I don't care.

[B]

Say what you just said.

[A]

Because I don't.

[B]

I said you didn't not request a.

[A]

Man because I don't care.

[B]

You were hoping for a lady boy.

[A]

No, I don't care. Put in a request. No, it's a very professional.

[C]

Rebecca. Listen to the show.

[A]

Yes. Rebecca's the one that recommended this place to me.

[B]

Does she know what a pervert you are? I would never send you to a time.

[A]

It does. No, but. No, there was nothing weird. Well, it was weird, though, because it was a Thai massage. What? I don't. Is Thai massage. Like, is it, like, focused on your butt a lot?

[C]

Oh, my God, no.

[B]

What are you talking about?

[C]

Is this serious?

[A]

Yes. There was, like, just a lot. I've not gotten a Thai massage. And there was a lot of, like, kind of like. Like rubbing of the. Like, massaging of the chest.

[B]

What percentage of the massage was focused on your ass?

[A]

80 85. No, no, Jeff. John, I'm totally joking. Jeff, that was a joke.

[C]

No, What?

[A]

Realistically, like 15, you know, 15, 20.

[C]

Your whole body.

[B]

Your whole.

[A]

I have a teenage. How much is supposed to be on your anus?

[B]

Is that 85? That's a good massage.

[A]

No, but I get so awkward. Anyway, so I was a trainer.

[B]

Irv's Burgers in Malibu.

[E]

They have one someone.

[B]

Sorry, we'll get back to your hole.

[A]

Celsius is great. The question I have about the massage is that he. Is it correct they walked on your back? Yes. And it was a man. He fully got on my. Like, I mean, he. How much did he weigh? And then did he have palaces?

[B]

This is weird.

[C]

Was he a big.

[B]

He walked on your back?

[A]

Yes, that's normal in a time of. Yes, that's what I'm saying.

[B]

Like an 80 pound woman to walk on your back.

[A]

Not like a. That's sexist. Like this guy.

[B]

It was a lady.

[E]

Boy, there is herbs burgers.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Well, it says right there.

[B]

I know that we should consider that.

[C]

Can you make it that far?

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Our first appointment is in Malibu.

[B]

If we can get past the first one, then I won't fall asleep. We could do Irv's. We do the Malibu appointment, then Irvs Burgers, then the Palisades, then I come home and take a grandpa nap camp.

[A]

Ah, my first baby.

[C]

Oh, you're gonna wait until after your first.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, my God. Congratulations on baby. But more importantly, Mercedes, congratulations on. New listing, 837 Northwest Knoll, number 106.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Thanks for listening. If you want more of this, listen to Jeff Lewis Live every weekday on Sirius XM as well as the Jeff Lewis Channel, exclusively on the SiriusXM app.

[A]

Sometimes an identity threat is a ring of professional hackers. And sometimes it's an overworked accountant who.

[B]

Forgot to encrypt their connection while sending bank details.

[A]

I need a coffee. And you need Lifelock.

[B]

Because your info is in endless places.

[A]

It only takes one mistake to expose you to identity theft.

[B]

LifeLock monitors hundreds of millions of data points a second.

[A]

If your identity is stolen, one, we'll fix it, guaranteed. Or your money back. Save up to 40% your first year at LifeLock.

[E]

Com.

[A]

SpecialOffer Terms apply.