#1892 You'll Get Used to It - Part 2

Summary

Juicebox Podcast: Type 1 Diabetes
Episode #1892 – You'll Get Used to It: Part 2
Date: July 2, 2026
Host: Scott Benner
Guest: Mary (37, Marketing Exec and Type 1 Diabetic, Arizona)

---

Episode Overview

In this deeply personal and revealing episode, Scott Benner continues his conversation with Mary, who shares her complex journey through misdiagnosis, delayed Type 1 diabetes treatment, and the psychological hurdles of living with both diabetes and a history of eating disorders. The discussion is rich with practical insights, honest emotion, and humor as Mary unpacks the medical, emotional, and familial challenges she’s navigated—highlighting how medical mismanagement and life stressors intersect for adults with late-diagnosed Type 1.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Diagnosis Odyssey: From Pregnancy to Type 1 (02:09–13:39)

• Mary’s Background:

  • 37 years old, Arizona resident, marketing executive, pursuing MBA, wife, and mother of two (ages 5 and 9).
  • Diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes at age 32 after first being labeled Type 2 and gestational during pregnancy. Also has Hashimoto’s diagnosed in her early 20s.

• Pregnancy Triggers & Medical Oversight:

  • Symptoms and elevated blood sugar (A1C: 6.3–8.4) misattributed to gestational diabetes and weight. No antibody tests performed despite persistent symptoms and poor glucose control.
  • Postpartum, Mary’s blood sugars considered "normal" by her providers; told she was cured after delivery:
    • “Now that you’ve given birth, you don’t have diabetes anymore. You can go home, and you never have to check your blood sugar again.” (13:24–13:31, Mary)
  • Missed recognition of classic symptoms: rapid weight loss, extreme thirst, exhaustion, and poor wound healing.

2. Symptoms Masked by Motherhood & Trauma (16:23–23:52)

• Subtle Yet Serious Signs:

  • Weight loss and fatigue brushed off as postpartum or breastfeeding related.
  • Mary only sought further evaluation when she experienced sudden, severe vision changes:
    • "I couldn’t see my computer screen. I couldn’t see the TV, the floor was blurry. …I couldn’t see lane lines when I was driving at night." (18:22–18:39, Mary)
  • Eye doctor was the first to suggest testing blood sugar—reading over 600 mg/dL in his office.

• Medical System Failures:

  • ER visit resulted in fluids but no labs, no insulin, no ketone testing, and misdiagnosis as Type 2:
    • “They told me to lose weight and see an endo.” (20:44–21:03, Mary)
  • Later, antibody testing confirmed Type 1 but information and education were still lacking.

3. Extended Mismanagement & Personal Agency (31:52–41:42)

• Lack of Guidance:

  • Stayed with the same endo group for years, but provider turnover and poor communication left her adrift.
  • Was given both basal and mealtime insulin, Metformin, and other Type 2 meds; never offered a CGM or real education.

• Key Memorable and Frustrating Quote:

  • Describing her reaction to being told to tolerate hypo-like symptoms:
    • “They just said, ‘You’ll get used to it.’ And that, to me, just felt like more shaming. …Nobody explained, ‘Here’s why your body will get used to being lower, and here’s how long it will take, and here’s why it’s safe.'” (33:50–34:08, Mary)
  • Miscommunication left her believing she’d feel terrible at a blood sugar of 150 forever.

• Shifting to Advocate:

  • After feeling unsupported, Mary began tracking her own data and learning about diabetes management, eventually discovering Scott’s podcast:
    • “I only feel like I’ve had type 1 for the last year, year and a half, because that’s how long I’ve been like…Alright everybody move out of my way. I’m going to figure this out.” (21:18–21:40, Mary)

4. Life Stressors: Beyond Diabetes (35:08–38:20)

• Balancing Acts:
  • Sole family earner, supporting her disabled wife and two children (her son is autistic, has ADHD, and is bipolar).
  • Overwhelmed by caregiving and work demands—diabetes slid far down her priority list:
    • “Like, on my list of top five stressors, [diabetes] was so far down on the list.” (36:03–36:05, Mary)
  • Shame and lack of urgency from providers contributed to avoidance and inadequate self-care.

5. Mental Health, Eating Disorders, and Diabetes (23:52–30:32)

• Open Discussion on Eating Disorders:
  • History of anorexia and bulimia from age 13, pendulum swung to binge eating as an adult.
  • Perpetual focus on food and weight in diabetes management re-triggered prior struggles.
  • Learned coping strategies: limiting exposure to calorie information on food labels, using AI for carb counting but not calories:
    • “I just hold my hand over the big number. …I use AI to…describe what I’m eating. …I have trained it: Don’t you ever tell me the calories.” (26:39–27:14, Mary)
• Therapy as Lifeline:
  • Active engagement in therapy for eight years; credits her current therapist with ongoing recovery.

6. Systemic Medical Communication Failures (41:38–43:42)

• Delayed and Deficient Communication:
  • GAD65 antibody positivity was reported over voicemail, again with no additional education:
    • “Hey, Mary, so actually this antibody came back. And what that means is you’re actually type one.” (41:38–41:39, Mary)
  • No carb-insulin ratios provided, no CGM or pump offered, and dangerously simplistic correction advice (“If you’re ever over 200, give yourself 10 units and go on a walk.”)
• Health Risks Not Addressed:
  • Repeated labs showed signs of DKA, glucose in urine >1,000, and persistent A1Cs in 7–9 range for years—none acted upon by providers.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Medical Dismissal of Symptoms:
  • Mary (13:24–13:31): “Now that you’ve given birth, you don’t have diabetes anymore. You can go home, and you never have to check your blood sugar again.”
• On Feeling Unheard and Shamed by Providers:
  • Mary (33:50–34:08): “They just said, ‘You’ll get used to it.’ …And so I was like, well, fuck you then. I don’t want to get used to that.”
• On Misdiagnosis Frustrations:
  • Mary (20:44–21:03): “They gave me a bag of fluids, told me to go home, told me to find an endo, and said, you’re overweight and you have type two. You need to lose weight and see an endo.”
• On the Psychological Toll of Chronic Illness:
  • Mary (25:07–25:56): “Being so hyper focused on my food and my carb counting…As somebody who battles eating disorder tendencies…that was one of the most challenging things for me.”
• On Resilience and Taking Control:
  • Mary (21:18–21:40): “I really kind of only feel like I’ve had type 1 for the last, like, year, year and a half, because that’s how long I’ve been…Alright, everybody move out of my way. I’m…I’m going to figure this out now.”

---

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Mary’s Background and Diagnosis Uncertainty: 02:09–05:27
• Misdiagnosis and Gestational Diabetes Experience: 05:27–13:39
• Postpartum "Cure" and Symptoms Overlooked: 13:26–16:51
• Vision Crisis and Eye Doctor's Role: 18:18–20:09
• ER Failure and Endocrinology Frustration: 20:42–21:17, 31:52–41:42
• Eating Disorder Impact: 23:52–27:14
• Systemic Medical Communication Issues: 41:38–43:42

---

Tone and Style

Scott and Mary’s conversation is frank, humorous, and empathetic. Both inject wit—often dark, sometimes self-deprecating—while never losing sight of the emotional gravity of misdiagnosis or the daily realities of living boldly with insulin. Mary is assertive and candid, often punctuating her story with memorable one-liners and practical advice.

---

Summary Takeaways

• The episode offers a powerful real-world look at the harms of misdiagnosis, medical dismissal, and lack of patient education in adult-onset Type 1 diabetes.
• Mary describes practical, compassionate workarounds for managing diabetes with a history of eating disorders.
• Both host and guest reinforce the importance of patient self-advocacy and ongoing mental health support.
• The theme of “you’ll get used to it” is deconstructed—emphasizing the dangers of poor clinician communication and the need for thorough, individualized education.

---

If you’re newly diagnosed, a support person, or a provider, this episode offers invaluable insights into how to better listen, empower, and support people living with diabetes—especially those facing hidden battles outside the obvious scope of chronic illness.

Transcript

[A]

Hello, friends, and welcome back to another episode of the Juicebox Podcast.

[B]

Hi, my name is Mary. I just turned 37. I live in Arizona. I am a marketing executive. I'm in school earning my mba.

[A]

Nothing you hear on the Juice Box Podcast should be considered advice, medical or otherwise. Always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan. If you're new to type 1 diabetes, begin with the Bold Beginnings series from the podcast. Don't take my word for it. Listen to what reviewers have said. Bold Beginnings is the best first step. I learned more in those episodes than anywhere else. This is when everything finally clicked. People say it takes the stress out of the early days and replaces it with clarity. They tell me this should come with the diagnosis packet that I got at the hospital. And after they listen, they recommend it to everyone who's struggling. It's straightforward, practical, and easy to listen to. Bold Beginnings gives you the basics in a way that actually makes sense. The episode you're about to enjoy was brought to you by Dexcom, the Dexcom G7, the same CGM that my daughter wears. You can learn more and get started today at my link, dexcom.com juicebox USMED is sponsoring this episode of the Juice Box podcast, and we've been getting our diabetes supplies from USMED for years. You can as well usmed.com juicebox or call 888-721-1514, use the link or the number, get your free benefits check and get started today with usmed.

[B]

Hi, my name is Mary. I just turned 37. I live in Arizona. I. I am a marketing executive. I'm in school, earning my mba. My wife and I are raising our two young kids, and I am a type one diabetic, diagnosed coming up on five years.

[A]

How young are the kids?

[B]

Five and nine.

[A]

Oh, did you get one of them as a diabetes gift?

[B]

Well, one of them might have triggered my diabetes. I don't know. We're going to talk about that.

[A]

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Listen to me, okay? We're going to figure it all out. This is nice. Um, yeah, 32. When you were diagnosed, prior to that, how was your health?

[B]

So I can't actually tell you when I became a type one. I could tell you it was sometime between 2019 and 2021, between 30 and 32 years old. But the day somebody told me, oh, actually, you have type 1 diabetes was December of 2021.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Before that, health was okay. I've had Hashimoto's since my, gosh, early 20s. Maybe like, 22 or 23. So I've got that going for me, but, yeah, I never really had any major health issues.

[A]

Yeah. And did you intimate a moment ago that you cooked that younger baby inside of you?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. My wife carried and gave birth to our son. He's nine. And I carried and gave birth to our daughter, and she's five and a half. And she was born in September of 2020. And then I was finally diagnosed extremely late in December 2021.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Um, a whole, like, nine months after, I was in the ER for the first time with high blood sugar, which is the whole story we'll get into.

[A]

Are they brother and sister through the donor as well?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, we use the same donor.

[A]

Nice. That's fun. Did you guys decide ahead of time that it's like, you'll do one, then I'll do one, yeah.

[B]

Oh, we sure did. So my wife, she's eight years older than me. She actually turns 45 on Thursday this week. So it was just the obvious choice that she would go first and I'd go second.

[A]

She had to get going. Did you feel like afterwards, were you like, oh, I wish she was younger because she could have done the other one, too. I'm. I'm good not doing this, or were you excited to do it?

[B]

Um, I always wanted kids. I was never super excited about pregnancy, but it was kind of like it was something she really wanted to experience. And I was like, well, if you're going to do it, I have to do it. Like, you know what I mean? And she. She has a lot of health challenges herself. Her pregnancy was pretty horrible, and her delivery was pretty horrible. Like, you could not pay her to get pregnant again. So I was like, okay, well, I'll do it next. And then I was like, oh, hold my beer. Like, I'll have an even worse pregnancy and delivery than you. So you could not pay me to do it again. So we're quite happy. We're quite happy. Two. Two parents, two hands, two kids. We're all out of sperm. We're good to go.

[A]

I wish you would have said that 20 minutes from now so we could have called this episode. All out of sperm.

[B]

All out of sperm. We used all of our vials.

[A]

That's fun. Okay, well, I guess let's find the beginning of the story. So you're not sure. You're not sure when you started seeing symptoms, but they started going so slowly that you're aware of them now in hindsight, but didn't know about them then?

[B]

Yes and yes and no. So I Have a suspicion that if somebody had tested antibodies, maybe they would have shown up in late 2019, but. But maybe not. So, you know, getting pregnant as a lesbian is like a whole planned thing, right? So, like, before we had decided, like, okay, we're ready to have a second kid. So I went and had, you know, labs drawn and they did some flushing of the plumbing and just different things to prepare my body for pregnancy. And at that time I was actually, I've just. This is kind of a separate thing that we'll also talk about. I've lost. Oops, sorry. I've lost 80 pounds in the last, like three years. So I was at my highest rate at the time. And my lab results came back with an elevated A1C. It was 6.3. And I was asked, they were like, hey, so we're gonna go ahead and just classify you as type 2. It's the first time I'd heard that. And would you wait to get pregnant? Like, we'd like you to lose weight and try to get your A1C down. And I was like, well, no, because when they did all the testing to make sure my body was good to go, they actually found that I had a prematurely low egg count. And. And I was like, fuck you guys. Like, you don't tell straight fat people wait and not have kids. So did you ask her that?

[A]

Did you ask. Did you say. Do you. Do you say that the straight fat people.

[B]

Yeah, I'm pretty, I'm pretty assertive, pretty direct person. So I was like, no, we're going to move. We're doing this right now. It'll be fine. So they were like, okay, well, just so you know, when you do get pregnant, which was a few months later, we're going to just treat you as gestational from. From the get go. So I was treated, I was put on metformin before I got pregnant, and then I was treated as gestational. Throughout my pregnancy, I was given basal insulin. They gave me a bullshit meal journal and carb restrictions. They never offered me a cgm. My morning glucose was always above a hundred, which new slash, even to this day, I, I am extremely well controlled now. But to this day, my morning blood sugar is almost never below a hundred. There's just body that works that way. So they kept ramping up my basil really, really, really high, despite what I now know were low symptoms in the afternoons, in the evenings. Um, so during pregnancy, despite an absolutely massive amount of basil insulin, like, I think I was up to like 40 units a day at one point my A1C shot all the way up to 8.4 and I was labeled non compliant. Even though I. I promise I was compliant. I was doing all the things I was supposed to do. They were like, hey, you know, you're overweight. We only want you to gain 20 pounds. I've gained exactly 20 pounds through that pregnancy. Yeah. And nobody thought, oh, let's test this lady for antibodies. Because her A1C keeps shooting up and she's having, like a really high blood sugar pregnancy. And my daughter was egg. She was. She was almost ten pounds at birth. And. And they induced me three weeks early. She was three weeks early.

[A]

Well, Mary, they gave you the notebook. What did you want? You wanted more than that. They gave you the notebook? Yeah. Did it come with a pen? Did you get like a United Healthcare pen or something like that with it too? Or did they not even give you the pen?

[B]

Didn't even give me a pen.

[A]

We're going to take great care of you. Here's a notebook. Hey, I'm having trouble. You're non compliant. Thanks for all the help. Is that about. That's about how it went.

[B]

Oh, that's about how it went. Yeah.

[A]

Awesome. Thanks for all the help, everybody. That's great. So we. So, my gosh, did you. Did you like, make. Go through the whole pregnancy with that eight?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you were pushing and pushing and pushing with insulin. You couldn't. You Obviously you couldn't make it. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Wasn't. Wasn't budging. So. Yeah. And I had a really terrible birth story, which I won't get into because that's not why we're here.

[A]

But, I mean, is it a fun, terrible birth story? Because we can take a left turn except for the people who listen. They don't like the fluff in the podcast. Let me suggest to you, if you don't like the fluff in the podcast, Mary, you don't like a podcast. I mean.

[B]

Exactly. Exactly. Well, and this is clearly. This is a storytelling episode. You know, those are the ones I like. So if you don't. I don't. I don't care.

[A]

Yeah, don't listen. Yeah, yeah. Tell your story any way you want. And somebody online just said to me the other day, she's like, I know you help people and everything, but I don't like all the fluff. And I was like, the fluff.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

It's the whole thing. That's my thing. That's.

[B]

So don't listen to those. There's plenty of, like, you know, tactical episodes.

[A]

Yeah. Well, that point was made, too. I don't want to get off topic because then people say, I was talking about myself. I can't win, Mary. They'll be. Also, I like the way I follow the story and I follow what I think is interesting. And someone said to me, like, you sometimes, like, you get away from the main point. And I thought, well, to me, it wasn't the main point. Like, it was. It would have been the main point to you if you were interviewing Mary, but you don't have a podcast, so I don't know what to tell you. Yeah.

[B]

Now, however you do what you do works really well for my brain.

[A]

Thank you, Mary. Appreciate that.

[B]

Now, I wish it was a fun. I wish it was a fun birth story. No, I was. I was in labor for four days, natural labor for four days, with absolutely zero pain management. I'm extremely stubborn, and I really wanted to see what my body could do. And I don't know when to quit. Just in general, in general, in life. I don't really know when to quit. I really don't ever know when to quit. It got to a point where, like, the baby was not doing well, I was not doing well. They were like, I call it an emergency C section, which is easier than explaining what actually happened. More like semi emergent. But they were like, listen, we can either, like, get you on Pitocin and get you an epidural, and you've got, like, four hours to get this kid out, or we can get you down to surgery and the next hour. And I was like, I have nothing left. I can't. Yeah, it's been four days of this. I can't imagine my. Anyway, anyway, so I chose the C section, and here we are.

[A]

Wouldn't acquit is hilarious. I'm waiting for you to tell me I'm not actually gay. I just brought it up once, and I'm sticking to it. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Hilarious.

[A]

Were you at your. At your highest weight during that pregnancy?

[B]

Yeah, I was. Yep. So I'm down 80 pounds from my highest pregnancy weight, which I think counts.

[A]

I. Yeah, I would.

[B]

I would probably gain £20.

[A]

I just want to tell you, if. If I was counting, that's exactly where I would count from.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

But weight an issue your entire life?

[B]

Yeah, weight and eating disorders an issue my entire life.

[A]

Okay. And how did you fix that? I mean, you're going to tell me, use the magic juice, right?

[B]

Uh, be well. Yes. And I became a type 1 diabetic. I kind of didn't have A choice. I didn't really have a choice anymore. Yeah.

[A]

Well, how did. So, yeah, go, go. I'm sorry, Babies out and go.

[B]

Yeah. Okay, so this is. Brick is kind of crazy. So I'm in the hospital. We were in the hospital for seven days. This is during COVID also, by the way, which absolutely sucked. And I got pregnant three months before COVID broke out. So I'm like, oh, wait, no. Keep in mind, when I was told that they were gonna call me a type 2 diabetic, like, that's all anybody said to me. I never talked to an endocrinologist. I did not know what that meant. I didn't know anybody with any kind of diabetes. Um, so I was like, okay. Like, I don't know what that means. I don't really care. And then I was treated as gestational. So in the hospital the first couple days after giving birth, of course, my blood sugars were great. That's what happens. And they were discharging me, and I was like, oh, wait, what do I do? Like, about my insulin and checking my blood sugar. And they said, oh, well, now that you've given birth, you don't have diabetes anymore. You can go home, and you never have to check your blood sugar again, and you never have to take insulin again.

[A]

Oh, snap.

[B]

I. I didn't know any better. So I said, great.

[A]

I knew this wasn't going to be a problem. Yeah. Yeah. And I didn't quit on that either, Scott. They said, don't take insulin. I didn't take it.

[B]

Yeah. I was like, this is fantastic.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

So then you hated doing that.

[A]

So you have. I mean, you have all the knowledge in the world, not all the details, but you have enough knowledge to take good care of yourself. And then somebody has said, you can stop doing that now, and you're going to tell me you went into DK at some point. How long did it take? You've probably heard me talk about usmed and how simple it is to reorder with usmed using their email system. But did you know that if you don't see the email and you're set up for this, you have to set it up? They don't just randomly call you. But I'm set up to be called if I don't respond to the email because I don't trust myself 100%? So one time I didn't respond to the email, and the phone rings at the house. It's like, ring. You know how it works? And I picked it up. I was like, Hello. And it was just the recording. It was like, US Med doesn't actually sound like that, but you know what I'm saying? It said, hey, you're. I don't remember exactly what it says, but it's basically like, hey, your order's ready. You want us to send it? Push this button if you want us to send it. Or if you'd like to wait. I think it lets you put it off like a couple of weeks or push this button for that. That's pretty much it. I push the button to send it and a few days later, box right at my door. That's it. Usmed.com juicebox or call 888-721-1514. Get your free benefits checked now and get started with usmed Dexcom Omnipod Tandem Freestyle. They've got all your favorites, even that new eyelet pump. Check them out [e-mail] juicebox or by calling 888-721-1514. There are links in the show notes of your podcast player juiceboxpodcast.com to us Med and all of the sponsors. The Dexcom G7 is sponsoring this episode of the Juicebox podcast and it features a lightning fast 30 minute warm up time. That's right from the time you put on the Dexcom G7 till the time you're getting readings. 30 minutes. That's pretty great. It also has a 12 hour grace period so you can swap your sensor when it's convenient for you. All that, on top of it being small, accurate, incredibly wearable and light. These things, in my opinion, make the Dexcom G7 a no brainer. The Dexcom G7 comes with way more than just this. Up to 10 people can follow you. You can use it with type 1, type 2, or gestational diabetes. It's covered by all sorts of insurances and this might be the best part. It might be the best part. Alerts and alarms that are customizable so that you can be alerted at the levels that make sense to you. Dexcom.com juicebox links in the show notes [e-mail] to Dexcom and all the sponsors. When you use my links, you're supporting the production of the podcast and helping to keep it free and plentiful.

[B]

Six months.

[A]

How much? And you were losing weight, so you thought, oh, the baby weight's coming off.

[B]

Oh yeah, that's exactly how it happened. So. So a month, A month postpartum. I did get labs. A1C was part of that. My A1C was C was down to 6.3. And there were no alarm bells. Like, nobody was concerned about this and I did not know what it meant. Um, I also healed really, really poorly from my C section. It took months, probably because my blood sugar was high.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Um, my doctor had to put two different wound vacs on just to get it to seal up. Then also, this is where it's like triggered on the egg. Was it before pregnancy or did pregnancy trigger it? Or was it. We had our first of many bouts of the original Covid that December when our daughter was three months old. So, like, you know, take your pick, brush and roulette.

[A]

I'll never know.

[B]

Doesn't. Doesn't actually matter. Just interesting to think about. So December through March, so this is three to six months postpartum. I started having symptoms which I thought were breastfeeding symptoms. I was exclusively pumping around the clock, like eight times a day. I lost like 40 pounds. I was peeing buckets. Water was the best thing I had ever had in my entire life. I was exhausted. But, like, those are all symptoms. Again, I don't know. I don't. I don't necessarily know where the line is. But to be normal and not normal. I've never done this with my body before. Even though I was a parent already, I was like, ah, yay, I'm losing weight. Like, this is the best diet I've ever been on. And like, I'm really thirsty. You've got to like, double your water intake when you're breastfeeding. And I'm peeing a lot. Well, that happens when you get up in the middle of the night and I'm tired. I have a toddler and a newborn, so I just thought absolutely nothing of it until I started losing my vision.

[A]

Did that. By the way, some people, that doesn't even get them. So did you.

[B]

That's what got me. That's what got me. Yeah, I. And I've worn glasses almost my whole life. And. But this was not just, oh, my prescription has changed. Like, I couldn't see my computer screen. I couldn't see the tv, the floor was blurry. And I. I could no longer see at night. Like, I couldn't see lane lines when I was driving at night. I couldn't drive at night anymore. And we have some family eye stuff. And I was like, oh, shit. It's that thing that happened to my aunt's eyes. Like, I gotta get to the eye doctor. So I get this. I go to the eye doctor and this sweet, sweet man, he's doing the exam. I'm telling him everything that's happening. Um, I'm. I. At the time, I'm less so now, but at the time, I was still very prickly. If anybody brought up, like, weight or diabetes, because it was. It was pretty triggering, like, my whole pregnancy.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

As gestational, it was pretty triggering for me from, like, a eating disorder perspective. So he's like, has anyone ever diagnosed you with diabetes? And I was like, well, I had gestational, but, you know, that was, like, six months ago.

[A]

That's over now.

[B]

Yeah, that's over now. You know, I'm, like, getting defensive. He's like, have you, like, when's the last time you checked your blood sugar? I was like, before I gave birth, they told me in the hospital I didn't ever have to check again. Like, I'm defensive at this point, and he's literally holding my hand, and he's like, can I please? He's like, we have a meter here in the office. Can I please check your blood sugar? And, like, fully beat red at this point, I'm like, fine. I was over 600 seconds before that.

[A]

You're like the patriarchy. And then.

[B]

Yeah, but seriously, this eye doctor, this amazing. I still go to this eye doctor, and every time I see him, I'm like, you saved my life.

[A]

Yeah. What a thoughtful person. That's awesome.

[B]

Yeah. So he was like, I'm gonna need you. He's like, we're not gonna finish this appointment. I need you to go to the ER right now. Would you like me to call an ambulance? And I was like, what?

[A]

An ambulance? What are you talking about?

[B]

No, I don't want to pay for an ambulance. And I was like, I'll take myself to the er. I have to go home and get my pump, and I need to call my mom and have my mom come and, like, help my wife with the kids because, you know, who knows how long the ER is going to take? So. So this was March 15th of 2021. So I went to the ER, and it was the most disappointing experience.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They didn't run any labs. They didn't give me insulin. They didn't test my ketones. They didn't test my antibodies. They gave me a bag of fluids, told me to go home, told me to find an endo, and said, you're overweight and you have type two. You need to lose weight and see an endo.

[A]

Awesome. Thank you. Awesome. So the. At this point, let me just make sure I understand. The eye doctor so far is the Most steady, competent, competent medical person involved in this story so far.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

And so.

[B]

And that's, by the way, the. Where we're going with this is I was grossly mismanaged for four years, and it put my life at risk. Oh, my God. So I chose to take charge. So I really kind of only feel like I've had type 1 for the last, like, year, year and a half, because that's how long I've been like. All right, everybody move out of my way. I'm. I'm going to figure this out now.

[A]

Ask a quick question off of that. Before we started recording, you said you've listened. You've heard the entire podcast.

[B]

Almost. I've listened to almost every episode, just in the last year. I only discovered you a year ago.

[A]

That's what I was going to ask you. In the last year. You did that? Are the kids okay? Did you. Are they in a closet? Did you quit your job? How did you make so much time?

[B]

I work from home, in my home office. So my favorite places to listen to the podcast are in the shower and when I'm driving. Driving. And if I'm having just a slow day at work where I'm just running a bunch of numbers and reports, I'll just have it on in the background.

[A]

Yeah, I listen to YouTube videos in the shower in case people are wondering what I'm doing when I'm showering. Yeah, no, I. I. Or I talk. Or I talk to Nai Bot to, like, work through my ideas for the day.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know if everybody else is up to that yet, but you guys will be in a couple of years. You'll stop making fun of me a couple years from now.

[B]

My wife always. My wife always has a. An ear airpod. I don't know. It's not actually an airpod. It's an earbud thing. She always has one in her ear. And she's always listening to a podcast in the background. Yeah, but she likes podcasts about serial killers. So, like, I'll get in the car with the kids, and it'll connect to her Bluetooth, and it'll be like. And then he stabbed her 500 times. I'm like, hey.

[A]

Hey, guys. Hi, everybody. Everyone's fine. Everyone's fine. Older mommy is not crazy, which is, I assume, what we call her.

[B]

And actually her name is Mommy, and I'm Mama's. You got that right.

[A]

Mommy. Mama. Okay. I wish I would have got to pick more. They just call you what they call you, and then you're, like, stuck.

[B]

Our son actually named us. We. We were interchangeables until he turned two and then he decided she was on me and I was mama, and that's what I wanted. So I was happy.

[A]

Oh, it's nice. Are you. You had your. You had your.

[B]

I wanted to be Mama.

[A]

You had your chips on Mama.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

I want to stop here for a half a second because I feel like we're about to get very sad about what happened to you after the. The emergency room. So let's just double down on sad. Where did the eating disorder start, and how did it manifest and how did you manage through it?

[B]

All that stuff started when I was 13. Anorexia and bulimia. I was in the hospital a couple times, in and out of therapy, and honestly, it continued. It was the most severe. I mean, I'm five. I've always. But I've been five, seven for a long time, so I'm a fairly tall lady, and I was like £100 at one point in, like, middle school. It was. It was the most acute for a few years. Got better in high school, but honestly, it didn't really stop until, my gosh, probably mid-20s. And it's something I fight even to this day. And then kind of the pendulum swung in the other direction with binging and overeating and, you know, you get married, you have kids, you start gaining weight. It's what happens. Emotional eater. And something I want to talk about at some point is how hard it was to be. Become a diabetic and have to be so hyper focused on my food and my carb counting. As somebody who battles eating disorder tendencies, and I've worked my way through that for the most part, but that was one of the most challenging things for me.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, I can't imagine it does.

[B]

Obviously, I found some tricks that I'll share to kind of.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Be less triggering to myself.

[A]

Okay, we'll get back. We can get back to it if you want or.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Even being way. Even being weighed, like, at. I started refusing because I saw two doctors every week. I had two doctors appointments every week for my whole pregnancy. I was considered so high risk for. For many reasons. And I started just refusing to let them weigh me. I was like, one of you can weigh me every other week and you can compare notes and you're not going to tell me what number you saw. And, like, keeping the journal was triggering. Having them nitpick. Everything I ate was triggering. Counting the carbs, like, it was all so triggering. And then it got ten times worse when I realized I was, I was type 1 diabetic.

[A]

So I employed part of your strategy this weekend when I took my very fashion forward 22 year old daughter out to buy some clothes for summer. And I said to the guy ringing it up, I said, listen, here's what's going to happen. You're going to ring all that up and then I'm going to hold my credit card over here. No one's going to mention how much this was, okay? He looks at me and I went, I don't want you to tell me, I don't want you to show me. I was like, just let me know when it's time to reach out with my hand. I was like, I don't want to know.

[B]

Yeah, ye. No to totally. So we'll, we'll take a little up turn and then, and get, then get back on track. But so for me, counting carbs is less triggering than counting calories because the way I would hurt myself in the past was via count, calorie restriction and calorie counting.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

So I've just learned when I look at nutrition labels, I just hold my hand over the big number. I just don't, I just don't look, I don't look, I don't care. I don't want to know. And I use, because I cook a lot so often, you know, I'm not eating something from a box. I don't know exactly how many carbs it is. And so I use AI right to describe what I'm eating. And I'll show a picture of my plate with my hand next to it. Oh, and I have tr. I have trained it. Don't you ever tell me the calories. All I want to know are the macros and it knows that.

[A]

Oh, how about that?

[B]

Those are my like workarounds.

[A]

Yeah, great idea.

[B]

And yeah.

[A]

Did you learn that in therapy? Did you learn that on your own? On your own? Was the therapy valuable ever? I mean, do you, do you understand the core of where your pain is from? Or do you, and is that like, is the reason you still struggle, you think? Because you haven't been able to affect that as much as necessary or like, what do you see as the, as the mechanism?

[B]

Well, so I'm, I'm still in therapy. I'm a big fan of therapy now, but I didn't actually comply with any kind of therapist until I met my current therapist. And she and I have been working together for, gosh, probably eight years now. And yeah, I've done A ton of growing and a ton of healing and even this diabetes journey has really like stretched me in some ways that have ultimately been positive. But you know, I'm a, I'm a typical type AAA perfectionist. That kind of sums it up with, with a history. With a history. With a history of trauma. So like there, there you go.

[A]

Right. When, when my series comes out on Friday this week with Erica, I'm going to put out a four part series. You don't. No one knows this, I'm telling you right now, but it's on the, the paces and it's kind of an explanation of like there's adverse childhood experiences, but there's also positive childhood experiences and so will you skip that or will you. Or you.

[B]

No, I want to listen to that.

[A]

Okay. I wasn't sure how the triggering worked exactly. Like.

[B]

No, I'm a big fan of that.

[A]

Okay. Okay. Yeah, yeah. It's. So if we took that paces that aces quiz, you'd have a fair amount of like childhood trauma.

[B]

A fair amount. Yeah. I like to hide behind my wife's. I'm really good at that because her, her childhood trauma trumps almost anyone I've ever met. So I'm really good at hiding behind her. But yeah, yeah.

[A]

You're like, yeah, I've had problems.

[B]

I got plenty of my own.

[A]

I've had problems. But have you met shit show over here?

[B]

And so literally, literally we, we've. We engaged in couples therapy when our son was young just to. We just had to learn how to fight. Really. That's it. And it was actually with. Who is my therapist now? We started seeing her for couples therapy. She taught us how to fight. And then I was like, hey, can you be my. Just my therapist? And she said, yeah. And literally in those appointments I would be like, well, yeah, that happened to me. But did you know what's that like stuff XYZ and therapist would be like, you need, you need some one on one health.

[A]

Hey, why don't you stay like for a year. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

For eight years.

[A]

We'll chat every once in a while. You'll be fine in 2029.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

But you're saying that prior to meeting that person you were. Somebody was taking you to therapy but it was more mandated and you weren't really.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Down with it. Okay.

[B]

Yeah. Even, even I would take myself to therapy and then not, not, not be

[A]

open so you know, the, the lying to yourself. Listen is my favorite part of being like a person.

[B]

I am, yeah. I am so much more I'm a huge fan of learning and growth. Like, that's, that's my jam. It's just taken a really long time to get there and it's. It's a lifelong journey.

[A]

Yeah, no, for sure. I mean, listen, dude, I think everyone

[B]

should be in therapy.

[A]

I think everybody gets thrown in some sort of a hole, whether they realize it or not, you know, and like you said, if you, if you grew up poorly, if she grew up poorly, then you get married. You don't even know how to, like, exist together because you only have, like, you only have your, you know, your examples from growing up.

[B]

Exactly. And I, and I, like, like, it's weird for me because, like, in a lot of ways, I have a great child, I have great parents, I have great family. It's just there were some acute things,

[A]

like some big hitters.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, some big. Some big hitters. So it's not like I had a terrible childhood or upbringing. I really didn't. And it was like night and day different from my wife's.

[A]

But yeah, it's interesting. I mean, my, my wife helped me. Like, if it wasn't for her having, like, emotional intelligence when we were younger, like, she was able to redirect me. I'm sure, I'm sure she would tell you it took way longer than it should have or something like that, but I'm sure she'd tell you I'm not there yet. But. But she also has the ability to, like, point out what's happening to me and ignore the parts about what happened to her. So it's interesting how people. Yeah, people. People. Anyway, okay, let's get you back to the hot. Let's. Let's jump from that big pile of fun back to the hospital. ER tells you lose weight, you're type two, and then.

[B]

Yeah, go home. Yeah, yeah. So I did actually see an end of the next day. So, um, and actually I said, like, I hadn't known anyone with diabetes. That was true. But somewhere along this journey, I have learned that my dad had been diagnosed with type 2 and my mom had been diagnosed with Hashimoto's after I had been diagnosed. And both of my brothers also have type 2. So at this point there was like a family endocrinologist. And so my mom made a few phone calls and I did get in to see an end of the next day. Um, and I was with that Endo's office with the revolving door of providers for four years and they sucked. So they gave me short acting, they gave me basil and, and short Acting meal insulin. They gave me Metformin. They gave me Jardians, which just gave me yeast infections. They didn't give me cgm, so that makes you pee out sugar. That's a problem when you're a girl. I had already thrown away my pregnancy meter, so they gave me a sample. And that's the same, like, finger stick meter that I use today. I was vaguely told to get my blood sugars down, you know, and they, and they were like, just come back every three months. We'll run labs every three months. And, you know, at one point I was like, hey, so I'm trying to. Trying to prick my finger and like, I'm trying to get my blood sugars down, but when I get down to 1:50, I'm like, I am. Like, I feel like I'm going to pass out. I am sweaty and shaky and dizzy and, like, I don't like how that feels. And they just said, you'll get used to it. And that, to me just felt like more shaming. And so I was like, well, fuck you then. I don't want to get used to that. Like, nobody explained, here's why your body will get used to being lower, and here's how long it will take, and here's why it's safe. And, you know, it was like when somebody who's overweight says they're hungry and, you know, it was that kind of shaming to me.

[A]

So can I ask a question around that statement? You'll get used to it. Was it?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Did you take it to mean that, yeah, you'll be dizzy and feel terrible, but you'll, you'll get. They didn't explain it the way that they meant it, which is your body will get accustomed to that and you won't get dizzy at 1:50 anymore.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

So you left the office, you left the office thinking, for the rest of my life, I'm going to be dizzy at a 150 blood sugar.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Communication. I just want to say no, thanks.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, thank you. And so I. And so. Okay, we're gonna take another little side journey really quickly. I. So my life is. I am not unique. Everyone has busy, but, like, I've been really busy, like, because I don't know when to quit. And I'm type aaa and I'm a perfectionist on all those things. Right. So, like, I. I'm the sole earner for our family. I work full time. Um, I wasn't in school at the time. I am in school now, running my mba. You Know, I had two young kids. Um, my wife is actually disabled and she's a full time stay at home mom. And so there's some, you know, some extra support that I provide for her sometimes there. And then our son, it has challenges as well. He's autistic and have ADHD again.

[A]

Mary, I'm sorry, you cut out. You cut out for a second. Mary, can you hear me? Ooh, you cut out. Yeah, yeah, you cut out for a second. He's autistic and.

[B]

Oh, and has ADHD and he's bipolar.

[A]

Okay. And he's. I'm sorry, he's the older or the younger?

[B]

The older. Yeah, he's nine.

[A]

Okay, go ahead.

[B]

Um, but at the time when this was all happening, you know, he was like, like three. Um, and so we hadn't figured all of this out. All I knew was, you know, we have a child who is really violent, really angry, really destructive, really dysregulated, Getting kicked out of school, like, like on my list of top five stressors. This was so far down on the list. And, and, and listen, I take some responsibility for the fact that like, I could have taken this diagnosis more, more seriously even after I was told I was type one, which we're about to get to, but nobody told me I

[A]

should take it seriously.

[B]

Like, nobody made a big deal out of it. Nobody, nobody helped me understand what all of this means. And like, I have another autoimmune disease, Hashimoto's. And I was like, well, that's easy. And I just take some pills and I feel fine. And so this must be like that. And if I feel great, like, I mean, I was living life in the 600s. So at like 300, I felt fantastic. I felt way better than I did. So I was like, you know what, I don't have time for this. If you're not worried. I'm not worried. I'm gonna just move on.

[A]

I gotcha.

[B]

And bury my head in the san. Which is not something I've ever done in my life with anything. So it's very confounding to me that I just stuck my head in the sand for almost four years with this thing. But I, I didn't know, you know, to take it seriously.

[A]

I'm so happy I didn't make my joke about how busy I am because then you started telling me about your son. I was like, oh, God, I would have come off like such an idiot. I was going to say, did you wake up at 3:30 in the morning and build a type 1 diabetes and menopause webpage for your website.

[B]

Because that's.

[A]

That's what I did last night.

[B]

But I love that.

[A]

Well, a couple of ladies hit me online pretty hard. They're like, you don't have enough menopause content. I'm like, I'm sorry. I'll work on it. I'm getting there. We've gotten out to the fringes of content now, which is, you know, I started at the core and I've been building my way out. But, you know, I was like, oh, I don't have enough knowledge about this to be, like, valuable. So I did like a ton of research and put stuff together to talk to Jenny about. And then I was like, well, I can build a webpage around it so that it's ready to go out when the content goes out. And then I just never fell back asleep. And then at 7:30 in the morning, I was like, I guess I'll just get in the shower now.

[B]

Oh, sorry. Kind of a similar night. I couldn't sleep in the middle of the night either. So I got up and worked on one of my final papers. It's due this weekend. I know, but I'm also a little tired.

[A]

The kids problems. And I'm like, oh, God. Thank God I didn't say that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, It's.

[B]

It's been a. I mean, I could do a whole podcast just off of this.

[A]

No, it's gotta be beyond. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right.

[B]

So, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Oh, okay. I'm sorry. Go ahead. So nobody's. Nobody's telling you to take it seriously. You're living, like, generally, like, excuse me. Genuinely, you're in the 600s a lot.

[B]

Like, so I had been right when I was sent to the hospital. And since then I. I was averaging. I was like, living life in the two and three hundreds pretty consistently, and I felt great. And I did not like how I felt when I was down at like 1:50. And so I was like, I'm just gonna do what I'm gonna do. And like, I'll come every three months for the labs, which they never walked me through and never explained to me. Now I have a spreadsheet of all my lab results going back to 2016 with, like, definitions and charts. But back then I just trusted the doctor would tell me if there was a problem, and they really didn't.

[A]

So you did not have an expectation that you were doing anything that was like, that could have been made better. You were okay. You were like, I. I feel good at 300. Nobody's telling me any differently. That was that. That's kind of how it went.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

I was losing weight slowly but surely, and my A was lower than it was when I was pregnant. It was down to the sixes. I'd been in the nines, but, you know, it. It did come back up to the eights. I settled in, like, the sevens and eights for a few years. Um, but. But also just, you know, they'd say, like, well, we'd like to get your A1C down. But they didn't say why, you know,

[A]

and you didn't look. No, no. Did you think. Were you purposefully not looking a little bit?

[B]

Like I said? I. I don't know that I'll ever fully understand why or how I just, like, turned a blind eye. Like, you know what? I'm not dealing with this because that's not actually who I am. I'm very driven and focused and high achieving and all the things. And with. But with that, with my health, I think it was so wrapped up in other triggers and trauma and shame and embarrassment that I was like, I'm just gonna close the book on that and I feel fine and I'm just gonna move on and I don't want to know. I don't want to know anymore. And they're not telling me anymore. And, like, I'm just gonna move on. I'm fine.

[A]

I got.

[B]

I was not fine.

[A]

I understand, by the way. Yeah. By the way. I've done this long enough now that I completely understand. I. You know, there's a. There was a time back making this podcast before, like, I would have asked more, like, are you like, how did you miss that? Like, or why did you not? Or like. But after hearing people discuss themselves long enough, like, I. I see what happened to you, so it makes sense.

[B]

Yeah. You know, so. So it turns out about three months after I was in the hospital, somebody tested my GAD65 antibodies. They didn't tell me. Um, they were elevated. They were not crazy. I think they were like 13 or something, so just a little high. Um, but nobody told me. So then three months later, they tested all the antibodies and three of them came back positive. Um, and they told me, so this is December now of 2021. So a whole year after I'd given birth, like, six months after being in the hospital, I was told over a voicemail, hey, Mary, So actually this antibody came back. And what that means is you're actually type one. They didn't explain anything else. I wasn't given any additional tools or information. I was never connected to a diabetes educator. I was told to just keep doing what I was doing. But what they did tell me was, if you're ever over 200, give yourself 10 units and go on a walk.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Which. That is not my correction factor.

[A]

Wait, what. What state do you live in?

[B]

Arizona.

[A]

Okay, go ahead. Keep coming.

[B]

I have a great no now, by the way. Uh, actually, he knows as much as me, maybe even a little more than me, which is great, because this other office, I don't think knew anything about type one. Yeah. So I wasn't given a carb to insulin ratio. I didn't even know what the word golus was. I was still not offered a cgm. Nobody talked to me about a pump. I was just giving very irresponsible advice. So by February of 2022, so almost a year after going to the ER, my A1C was back up to 9. 3. My Gad 65 was up to 19. Less than a year later, it was above 2:50. And to this day, like, my lab results don't even give me a number anymore. It just says greater than 250. So I have no idea what the number actually is. It's just very high. My fasting glucose in February 2022 is 3. 28.

[A]

And they're still calling you a type two, right?

[B]

Well, no, they're calling me a type one now.

[A]

Now they're calling after the GAD that you started getting type one from them.

[B]

Plus two other. Yeah, plus two other. I think it was I a two and pilot cell.

[A]

But prior. Prior to that, it was all just body. It was your body makeup, and you must have type 2 diabetes, because look at this. Okay.

[B]

Yep. Yeah. So now, in September 2022. So we're two years after my daughter was born, just probably when this all started, if I had to guess. So again, this is me now looking back, because I charted, like, 10 years of my own labs once I finally took the bull by the horns. And so I was looking back, and I could see that in September 2022, I had trace protein in my urine. I had glucose in my urine above a thousand. This all indicates dka. Nobody told me that. Nobody walked me through those labs. It was just a routine visit. There are a bunch of other lab levels that indicate things like fluid loss, dehydration, inflammation on Manjaro.

[A]

This episode was too good to cut anything out of, but too long to make just one episode. So this is part one. Make sure you go find part two. Right now. It's gonna be the next episode in your feed. Foreign Dexcom Sponsored this episode of the Juice Box Podcast. Learn more about the Dexcom G7 at my link dexcom.com juicebox A huge thanks to US Med for sponsoring this episode of the Juice box podcast. Don't forget usmed.com juicebox this is where we get our diabetes supplies from. You can as well use the Link or call 888-721-1514. Use the link or call the number get your free benefits check so that you can start getting your diabetes supplies the way we do from usmed. The Diabetes Variable series from the Juice Box Podcast goes over all the little things that affect your diabetes that you might not think about, from travel and exercise to hydration and even trampolines. Juiceboxpodcast.com go up in the menu and click on Diabetes Variables. Thank you so much for listening. I'll be back very soon with another episode of the Juice Box Podcast. If you're not already subscribed or following the podcast in your favorite audio app like Spotify or Apple Podcasts, please do that now. Seriously, just to hit, follow or subscribe will really help the show. If you go a little further in Apple Podcasts and set it up so that it downloads all new episodes, I'll be your best friend. And if you leave a five star review, ooh, I'll probably send you a Christmas card. Would you like a Christmas card.