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Heather McDonald
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Danae Hayes
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Heather McDonald
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Danae Hayes
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Heather McDonald
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Danae Hayes
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Heather McDonald
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Heather McDonald
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Danae Hayes
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Heather McDonald
Heather McDonald has got the Juicy Scoop. When you're on the road, when you're on the go, Juicy Scoop is the show to know.
Danae Hayes
She talks Hollywood tales for real life.
Heather McDonald
Mr. Sigmund serial data and cereal Sister. You'll be addicted and addicted fast to the number one tabloid real life podcast.
Danae Hayes
Listen in. Listen up. Woo woo.
Heather McDonald
Hannah McDonald juicy scoop. Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop. I'm so excited to introduce you to a new Juicy Scooper. You may be familiar with her hilarious stand up comedy. Yes, she's a funny lady. Hi funny lady. Thank you for having me. Isn't that the dorkiest thing to say to someone? Funny lady Danae Hayes. She is got her Buckwall tour. She is a tall, gorgeous, happy lesbian from the south.
Danae Hayes
Happy lesbian. I need to make tour merch that says that I'm a happy lesbian. Lesbian
Heather McDonald
and oh my gosh. But we were just talking about my Juicy Scoopers. No, I love fashion. I always think I like look good when I choose my outfit on stage. But I've been doing this for so long and I have changed my style many times on stage. I just started wearing dresses. I never did.
Danae Hayes
I feel like, I feel like that would be hard doing stand up comedy in a dress.
Heather McDonald
When I started I never wore dresses because I thought oh that's distracting and legs and like I don't think people. And then when I saw like younger people and other comedians like dressing up and I'm like my God you're right. I'm like I like that look. And then some of it I liked, some of it I didn't. Anyway, I your body is banging and like you have a real nice snatched Flat waist.
Danae Hayes
Thank you.
Heather McDonald
Which I think is the best thing you could have. If you are a female comic, forget about being funny.
Danae Hayes
All you need is a divorce. Just go through a divorce. I think I dropped 25 pounds after I got a divorce. And people are all like, my deed
Heather McDonald
divorce from your other. From your other wife.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
Well, you only have one wife.
Danae Hayes
I was about to say you do have a girlfriend. That I just said, like, I'm a Mormon swinger. No. Yeah, I was married to one lady. Sounds like I was married to an 80 year old, but I was married to a lady. And after the divorce, I think I did. I think I dropped like 25 pounds.
Heather McDonald
Which divorce diet is the way to go. Everybody says that.
Danae Hayes
People were like, oh, she's on Ozempic. And I'm like, no, it was literally just stress, nicotine, and lack of sleep.
Heather McDonald
Well, I don't know. It looks pretty good on you.
Danae Hayes
I'm gonna keep doing it. Yes, keep doing it.
Heather McDonald
You're not afraid you're gonna just be like, get. Become a fat, happy lesbian?
Danae Hayes
Look, I want to be able to stand sideways, stick my tongue out and look like a zipper. Like, that's my goal in life. I've always been the girl that struggles, struggled with her weight. I think I was really. I was 16 or 17 and I had just like, I just had a muffin top, dude. Like, my muffin top was just. It was there. And I would not take like my warm up shirt off my softball jersey to play softball. I was the only one with it still on. And my parents were like, you were
Heather McDonald
a softball player too? Were you out at 16?
Danae Hayes
No, no, I hell everyone that on
Heather McDonald
this, on the softball teams, are they gay?
Danae Hayes
I would say like, I played softball at the University of Alabama and I would say probably 40%. That's nice. Yeah. So we, you know. But you weren't allowed to date the other players.
Heather McDonald
Okay, I did.
Danae Hayes
But you weren't supposed to.
Heather McDonald
But at 16 you did, you know or you weren't out?
Danae Hayes
No, I knew. I knew. I knew when I was 8 years old.
Heather McDonald
How did you know? When was that moment?
Danae Hayes
I didn't know what the word gay meant. I mean, you know, I'd seen Ellen DeGeneres on TV and I was like, we're kind of the same, but not really.
Heather McDonald
So did you identify more with her as being a gay woman or that I want to do what she does because I know I'm funny and I could see myself doing that.
Danae Hayes
She dressed different than most women, especially in the South. Like, everybody in The South, a lot of the women wear like Lily Pulitzer and like, they always look like they're going to church, even if it's on a Tuesday. And Ellen had a cool little style there for a minute. Not really my style, but I was like, oh, that's cool. She could color outside the lines. And I just gravitated towards that. I was a tomboy. Always wanted to beat the guys out on the playground. And then I just started to develop a crush on only the girls. When I noticed all the girls were like, I like the guys. And the guys were like, I like the girls. And I was like, well, what does that make me? I didn't know what gay was, so I told that to my parents and they were like, oh, hell no. They were not about it. We're from a really small town in Alabama.
Heather McDonald
Were you religious?
Danae Hayes
Yeah, the whole family were Southern Baptist. But I think it was less at that time about religion and more of just like, oh, God. We had imagined Danae to have a boyfriend, then that would be a husband and she'd have kids. And I think they also were like, this is gonna make her life really hard if this is, you know, who she is. And then she has to be this in our 1200 person town in Alabama. Which I don't blame them. It would have been really freaking hard.
Heather McDonald
But then at saying, hey, did they just go, okay, well, you know, and like brush it off? But they worried by in silence, or was it a constant conversation throughout your childhood?
Danae Hayes
They took me to conversion therapy. They didn't know at the time that that's what it was. They didn't like say, we're taking you to conversion therapy. Because we've had these conversations later in life now. And they were like, we found a guy that said he could help with this. We didn't know that that's what conversion therapy was. It was a religious therapist. And then he would just sit there in his recliner. He was like, what fucking therapist sits in a room?
Heather McDonald
Just you and him?
Danae Hayes
Yeah, just me and him. And he would sit there with his feet up and he would always be eating a turkey sandwich on white bread. It would just get stuck to the roof of his mouth and he'd be trying to get it off the whole time. And he whistled and I'm not, I'm not bullshit when I say this. He whistled when he talked. And he would just look at me and he'd be like, denae, it's not a sin. It's not a sin to think about robbing the bank. But it is a sin to go out and rob it. And so that was kind of our mo. Oh, okay. So I could think about hot girls, but I couldn't touch hot girls.
Heather McDonald
And how long did you go to him? Like, how many sessions?
Danae Hayes
God, I want to say maybe a year.
Heather McDonald
But would you talk about other things, like a normal therapist? Like, how was your week? How was school? It was just constantly about.
Danae Hayes
It would always start that way. Danae, what are you struggling with this week? And that was the same age that I got diagnosed with ocd. Really bad. And so we.
Heather McDonald
And how did you. How did. How did that come about?
Danae Hayes
I started feeling these feelings about how I knew I was different, but I couldn't control them, and I couldn't get them out of my head. And I was like, I just want to change. I just wish I liked the boys. And then, because I was so out of control with that area of my life, I started to develop ocd. So it was just constant counting with my feet. How many steps I was taking, how many times I touched a doorknob. I had to tell my parents I loved them 20 to 25 times before I could go to bed. Cause I thought they were gonna die in their sleep. And I needed them to know I loved them.
Heather McDonald
I've never really understood that. How all of a sudden, it can happen, and then in your head, you come up with the number of those things.
Danae Hayes
Yeah, it's more of like, okay, I need there to be 17 steps for me, at least there. I need there to be 17 steps by the time I get to that stop sign. And if I. If I could only make it in 19, I would start having to take bigger steps and jumping so that I could get back to 17.
Heather McDonald
And then how do you correct that?
Danae Hayes
That was a lot of. Just. My parents were very patient with that because that was the worst part of it all. My parents were just always using logic with me. Like, danae, we're not going to die if you take 19 steps over 17. And I would spiral, and they would be like, we're gonna force you to walk from here to there, and you cannot count. In fact, I want you to recite something in your head out loud so that you can't physically count. Starting to do that. We're just, like, living in the misery of not being able to fulfill that tic eventually made it easier for me.
Heather McDonald
Do you have it anymore?
Danae Hayes
Yeah, my OCD is now more of, like, obsessive loop, so it's less of, like, counting and physical actions, and it's More of like, when I'm in a really healthy space. It's my superpower because I get obsessed about what it is that I want to do. And my brain will not stop thinking about it. From the time my eyes open until my eyes close. Like, I could go, you know, if I'm awake for 14 hours, there's not a single 30 minute period where my brain hasn't hit that loop again. It's just rumination after rumination.
Heather McDonald
So in a good way, it would be like focus and manifestation.
Danae Hayes
Absolutely. So, like, back in 2022, I was watching Chelsea Handler at the Ryman, and I'd never done standup before. Like, I was just solely making funny videos online. And I filmed myself at the Ryman watching her as a spectator. And I said, one of these days I'm gonna be on that stage. Well, I would go back and I would watch that video constantly. And I was like, in my mind, I was like, I don't have a path forward, but I know I'm gonna do it. I know I'm gonna do it. So for the past four years, I've been obsessed about the Ramen, never doing standup. And then I just had my Ramen debut last week. So it's like, it works in my favor.
Heather McDonald
Yeah, I definitely believe in. In my day, we called it secreting. Cause there's a book called the Secret. I love the Secret. Now everyone calls it manifestation, but truly, it's also prayer. It's whatever works for you. It's actually believing in what you want. And it's interesting. Cause in my day, my friends and I would go, don't say he's gonna be your husband. That's jinxing it.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
And manifestation is like the opposite of jinxing. You should say it, you should vision it. You should be positive in your thoughts and confident in your success or whatever. And yeah, when I was young, we had cable and it was A and E evening at the Improv, and my parents, we'd watch it. We watch them. You know, all these comedians go on, they do these shows. And my parents would be like, oh, one day Heather will be on the improv stage. And then I do remember the first time I did the LA improv. And I was like, oh, you know, so I love that. And there's many other moments that I've done that. So it's cool to hear that you did it too, and it worked out. And congrats.
Danae Hayes
Thank you.
Heather McDonald
So let's talk about a little bit about your doing these videos and how you kind of Realized you were funny.
Danae Hayes
Yeah, I. My dad, he bought me a camcorder back when I was, like, 12. 12. I think this was before social media. Like, there was no, as my dad would say, Facebooks, you know, none of that. But I just was always sitting my dad and my mom down on the couch, and I was making them watch my Saturday Night Live performance. So I would, you know, I'd come up with, like, four storylines or four sketches, and then I would play all the characters. And my dad was like, you know, probably because he was getting sick and damn tired of having to watch me, he was like, I'm gonna buy you a camcorder. That way you can film it and watch it yourself. So he did, and I learned how to edit. And I just started creating as many sketches as I could come up with, and I would edit it to where it looked like this character was talking to this character.
Heather McDonald
And would you put it on YouTube or anything?
Danae Hayes
No. Cause YouTube, this was like, 2006 maybe. And I think I didn't even hear about YouTube till, like, 2008.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
So all of this was really just for me to have a creative outlet. And so I've always been that girl. But when you grow up in a really small town in Alabama, the arts aren't really celebrated. Like, you're kind of a loser if you want to do theater. And I was like, I want to be a loser. But I also was a stellar athlete who went on to play college softball, and we won a national championship.
Heather McDonald
And where'd you go to college?
Danae Hayes
Alabama, so.
Heather McDonald
Oh, that's awesome.
Danae Hayes
So I was stellar in the athletic department, and I was getting so much praise doing that, because that's what we love in the South. And I just didn't have the balls to do entertainment. So when the pandemic happened and we were all sitting at home and I was watching.
Heather McDonald
And did you have a regular job at that time?
Danae Hayes
Yeah, I was doing a pyramid scheme. Heather. I was. I was slanging. I was slanging fitness programs on the Internet.
Heather McDonald
Oh, really? Tell me about that.
Danae Hayes
Let me say this, all right.
Heather McDonald
It's called an mlm, right?
Danae Hayes
Mlm. Multi Level Marketing. Now, I will say this. Out of all the network marketing, you know, businesses out there, yours was the best. Mine was pretty good because we were helping people feel good. You know, however it. You know, I'm very embarrassed the fact that I did that.
Heather McDonald
But was it a product, too? Was it. How would. How would you get people underneath you to then get people underneath them? Like, how that work?
Danae Hayes
So I had Never heard of network marketing, other than maybe. I think it was called advocare. A lot of people in my hometown were doing that, but my ex wife, she was really good in the beachbody world.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
Like, really, really good. And I wanted to move to California and get out of Alabama for a little bit, but I didn't have a job because I was selling real estate at the time. And she was like, well, why don't you join my team and become a coach? And the way it was presented to me, which is how you learned to present it to somebody else, seemed pretty easy. And you don't really understand the ins and outs of it. But once I joined, my job was to help people buy fitness programs that they could do at home and not have to go to a gym to do. So that's why I'm like, okay, I wasn't out here pimping, like, leggings out or Tupperware.
Heather McDonald
Yeah.
Danae Hayes
There was some value of, like, helping people feel good about themselves. And I still get messages from a lot of the people that I signed up that say, you know, I know you probably didn't enjoy doing multilevel marketing, but you helped me lose 50 pounds, and I'm really grateful for you for that. So that is like. It's a conundrum, you know?
Heather McDonald
Yeah, good.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
Okay. So you're doing that, which is also great to be in it. When the pandemic hit. Right. That was like.
Danae Hayes
Everybody was working out at home.
Heather McDonald
Yeah.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
And so that's when you started to do some funny, like, comedic videos.
Danae Hayes
Yeah, I started doing a little bit of that. Nobody really seemed to care. And then I posted on a whim. One night, I posted on a whim, a prank phone call to a taxidermist in Alabama. I saw that one, asked him if he'd stuffed my dog. And had he not agreed to it and acted like that was too big of an ask, I don't think the video would have done as well. But he was like, yeah, where's the dog at? And I was like, he's in my deep freezer. And he was like, you've done everything right. Bring him up. So that video got, like, 26 million views. It is really funny.
Heather McDonald
And, like, how you're like. And also with your accent and everything and how you're like, you know, the dog really liked to always put his paws on the top of the chair. So could you put him. Could you position his body in that way?
Danae Hayes
Like he's pouncing.
Heather McDonald
Yeah. And he was like, oh, yeah. Like, we can put him in any position. And so what happened with that guy?
Danae Hayes
So, funny enough, I called him back and I said, hey, that was a prank phone call. I'm not bringing my dad rottweiler to get stuff. And he was like, oh man, that's
Heather McDonald
kind of sad about it.
Danae Hayes
He was like, business is really slow right now. And I was like, you asshole, Danae. I said, what's your number or your business name and everything? I'm going to put it in the comment section of the video, you know, if it does well. So the video took off. And I think he got like between 7 and $10,000 worth of business from that prank phone call. So I felt a little better about harassing him after that.
Heather McDonald
Do people in the south actually do their pets. Taxiderm.
Danae Hayes
Their pets? Heard of a couple of people stuffing their chihuahua when somebody had.
Heather McDonald
Really? When someone has like the. The deer head.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
Like in their living room.
Danae Hayes
That's just about every living room in Alabama. Or man cave.
Heather McDonald
So you kill a deer.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
And then you.
Danae Hayes
It's gotta be a buck with the antlers.
Heather McDonald
The man, you mean?
Danae Hayes
Yeah, the boy.
Heather McDonald
And then you who like takes the head to the guy.
Danae Hayes
Well, you take the whole body.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
So you don't wanna just chop its head off in the woods.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
The goal is to take it to a processing plant and let them strip the body of all the meat and the tenderloins, all that, the back strap.
Heather McDonald
And then you just do the head.
Danae Hayes
And then they sometimes will transport it over to the taxidermist and then they'll. They'll mount it for you.
Heather McDonald
Now do people ever resell that, like a piece of furniture?
Danae Hayes
Absolutely. They do it all the time.
Heather McDonald
Yeah.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. Because they're like, I. I never shot a 12 point, but I'd like to have said I had. So I'm gonna buy this off Facebook Marketplace and put it in the living room and pretend I shot it. Wow. It's. It's men.
Heather McDonald
Yeah. Yeah.
Danae Hayes
You'd never see a woman haggling a guy off Facebook Marketplace for a, you know, a 14 year old dead deer. Yeah, but a man would.
Heather McDonald
I grew up here, so we don't know about any of that. But now I live in an area that has a lot of deer and I just love it. So cute. Never. They're just so cute. Like whole families of four and stuff like that. They're just so cute. But I, hey, I understand if that's someone's culture and everything. I'm not here to judge.
Danae Hayes
Can I just say, I love how Politically correct. Everybody in California is. You're like, but I'm not judging.
Heather McDonald
Like, no, but honestly, I'm really not. Because I feel like that is a cultural thing. And I. So I'm not gonna say, like, it's awful. I really do am like that.
Danae Hayes
No, it's serious.
Heather McDonald
I think a lot of people are not like that, actually. But yeah.
Danae Hayes
Cause down south, like, that's. Cause, like, I'm from Alabama. I live in Nashville now. And it's so funny. Cause, like, I was on a podcast yesterday, and there was probably six or seven moments in that podcast where the host was like, I'm sorry if that was politically incorrect. And like, I didn't even know what politically incorrect meant until about three years ago. Because, like, the shit people say back home just. I mean, just zingers left and right. And you have like. My grandmother thinks it's okay to call people deaf and dumb. Like, she doesn't say they're deaf. She has to say they're deaf and dumb. And I was like, grandma, we got to cut the last half out. Like, they're just deaf. And she's like, well, they can't hear nothing, so what does that make them? And I'm like, you just say deaf, period. Like, I'm. And she won't call somebody. Like, she'd never be like, hey, that guy's a fat ass. But she'd be like, man, he is so big boned. And just zingers left and right. No. No political correctness back home.
Heather McDonald
Now, what did the grandma think of you being a lesbian?
Danae Hayes
I think it surprised her a little bit, but she was mostly upset because she thought in her heart like, Heather, I'm not joking. Like, she thought in her heart that I was gonna marry Tim Tebow. So it was less about me being gay and more of like, oh, so we're not gonna be able to have Tim Tebow in the house.
Heather McDonald
She really thought there could be. That could happen.
Danae Hayes
He's married now with a child, and she still brings him up. And I'm just like, that was never in the plan.
Heather McDonald
And you just love him because he's cute, football player and a Christian, and totally. Yes, yes, I know. We've talked so much about GLP1s and what it is doing and helping so many people and the multiple benefits. It's not just about getting rid of the food noise, losing those stubborn pounds, starting your weight loss journey, getting healthier. There's just. It's all those benefits that just enhances your life. And a lot of people are wondering how do I get it? Is it right for for me? Well, let me tell you about the Roboti pill. Right now the pill is a new, more convenient and approachable way to try GLP1s. So if you've been thinking about it, a self administrated shot can often be intimidating. And maybe that's what's keeping you from trying it. But now there's a pill that delivers comparable results. Starting a GLP1 weight loss journey on row is 100% online care, access to clinically proven FDA approved medications, free insurance check, side effect management and dosing Support, and more. RO offers the lowest cost GLP1s whether you're using insurance or paying cash. And after your first online visit, you're eligible for treatment. You can expect to start your medication in less than a week if paying cash, or about two weeks if you're using insurance. Go to Ro Co JuiceScoop to see if you're eligible for the new GLP1 pill on Ro. That's Ro Co Juicy Scoop. To get started on Ro, go to Ro Co Safety for boxed warning and full safety information about GLP1 medications. You guys know I love Honey Love. I've been wearing it for years. It's the greatest shapewear because it's designed to move with you so you can just say goodbye to the pesky shapewear that starts to roll down while you're dancing on the dance floor. I mean it squeezes you, it's targeted compression and enhance your your curves instead of like squeezing them. It's designed to work with your body so it flattens and squeezes your waist, flattens the tummy, squeezes the waist, lifts the booty and is really comfortable. So there's just so many outfits that I normally wouldn't bother or think to wear a shapewear but Honey Love is so comfortable that that I wear it and look that much more better, feel that much more confident in that cute outfit. It makes it so great. And Honey Love products feature lingerie inspired details that you'll want to show off with high quality fabrics that feel like a dream against the skin. Treat yourself to the most advanced bras and shaper on the market. Use our exclusive Link to save 20% off Honey Love at honeylove.com Juicy Scoop that's honeylove.com JuiceScoop after you check out, they'll ask you where you heard about them. Please support Juicy Scoop and tell them Heather McDonald sent you. Experience the new standard in comfort and support with Honey Love. My mom, one of the things that Got my standup going was I relayed a answering machine message because we had answering machine messages. It was like, one of my mom calling me and saying. And she had this, like, funny voice because she had, like, one vocal cord. And she's like, I lost one of my vocal cords after screaming at one
Danae Hayes
of my five children. And.
Heather McDonald
And she's like, heather, this is your mother. I've got two words for you. Conan O'. Brien. He's 6 5, Irish Catholic, went to Harvard, and he's going to be the new host of his own show, and he's single. And I just think that the two of you would be so funny together. And. And, you know, and. And then she would leave her phone number, you know, and, like, I think I know the phone number. She'd always leave the phone number. And so anyway, like, she really thought that, you know, Conan o' Brien being tall. Cause I'm tall and Irish Catholic. I'm Irish Catholic. That was just like.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. And it's as if you can just call him up today and be like, hey, want to go on a date? You know, like, that's what my grandmother thought about Tim was, oh, just give him a call.
Heather McDonald
Yeah. My mom was like, why don't you try to find him? And actually, he had a younger sister who was, like, in different levels at the Groundlings. And she did. See I did a little bit at the Groundlings or something about it. And she was like, that's my brother. And then I was so embarrassed because I would have gone out with him. He actually was dating Lisa Kudrow.
Danae Hayes
Oh, my God.
Heather McDonald
And I was like, you know, but there was no interest or anything. And then only once did I see him in person. It's a pretty good story.
Danae Hayes
Did you mention it?
Heather McDonald
No, but this did happen. Okay, so tell me. I'm on. I'm. You know, I was on Chelsea lately, writing and producing the show, and she did this, like, sketch where we were taking over the Conan o' Brien stages at Universal. So she had this, like, idea of how, like, there was a locker room, and she was gonna go in naked, and he was gonna go in naked, and it was, like, this funny thing. And so he was coming to do the scene, and I was walking by, and he was walking by with. And he did, like, do a vroom at me.
Danae Hayes
Really?
Heather McDonald
Yes. This recent. Like, he's married. I'm married. It didn't mean anything. And your mother still with us at that time? She. Yes. And I think I.
Danae Hayes
So you got to tell her.
Heather McDonald
I may have told Her. I may have forgotten to tell her. I may have gotten put together. Yeah.
Danae Hayes
So.
Heather McDonald
But both of us, I think, have been married for a very long time. Like, you know, he's just a little older than I am, but anyway.
Danae Hayes
That is Conan.
Heather McDonald
Hilarious. I still would like to go on your show now. I think it's just a podcast, but anyway, no, I never was on a show. I never met him other than that time. But I was like. And I was with a couple witnesses.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
So it absolutely happened.
Danae Hayes
I believe.
Heather McDonald
And I fully believe it. Yeah, it really did. Getting back to you again. Someone's. Okay, we read the comments, Heather. Let your guests speak. We've already heard your lame story.
Danae Hayes
Shut up. They say shit like that.
Heather McDonald
Only the mean ones. Anyway.
Danae Hayes
I just got a mean one in the car today that said something about I have a pepperoni pizza face because I filmed a video with no makeup and I had zits on my face because I started my period. Okay. From a guy. I'm just like, oh, I try to post and ghosts and not read all that shit. But it'll like, you know, you log into TikTok and it'll be like. It is hard right there.
Heather McDonald
It is hard. And it's the one thing that really helped me was. And I mentioned this, there's this girl. I can't remember her name right now, but she does her whole account. Brilliant is she'll find a post under, like, a beautiful person, Kate Hudson something. And then she will read the mean comments that they're saying about Kate Hudson, right? And she looks old. And then she shows the lady's face who said it, and the woman's like, yeah. And like, total, like, frumpa dumps not put together or awful biopsy, whatever. And ever since she's done that and I've found it, I follow her now. It really, really helps because when you hear something. Because there was like a time, like, sometimes I'd be like, thinking I looked so cute. I, you know, have a little outfit. And I think it's chic. And everyone's like, you know, whatever. Tons of likes everyone's liking it. And then I would just see, like, oh, she thinks that it. And it would sort of bother me. And now every time I read that, I just see this. You. That's what I see. I just see that.
Danae Hayes
And I go, why? Who cares? Please send me her profile. Cause I'd love to. So wonderful. My fix with that with some of my friends in Nashville that, you know, like, Lainey Wilson's a good friend of mine. I'll read her comments because I want to support her. And then, like, you know, a comment is bad, and I'm like, how do you say that on this picture of Lainey Wilson Gorge? You know what I mean? So that brings some lightness of, like, oh, there's just really miserable people out there.
Heather McDonald
Yeah.
Danae Hayes
Period.
Heather McDonald
The most. Yeah. It's so funny. Okay, so then you start doing. So that video kind of goes crazy, and then that encourages you to start doing more of what you've always wanted to do.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. So that once. The prank phone calls, I, like, bled those dry. That was kind of what I was known for at the beginning. And then I kind of got tired of them because I was like, you can only do something so much before you lose creative freedom on it. And so I started doing sketches. So I brought a lot of the sketches back from, like, my. My childhood or that energy. And then.
Heather McDonald
And would you do all those just by yourself, playing different parts?
Danae Hayes
Yep.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. So that. Because it was the pandemic, so I was, you know, kind of isolated at home and. And bored out of my mind. And then I moved to Nashville, and I started releasing country comedy music. So, like, one of my songs is called Dick in My Nightstand, but it sounds like a legit.
Heather McDonald
Can you sing a little of it?
Danae Hayes
Yeah. She's like, I got a dick in my nightstand I can use left hand.
Heather McDonald
So good. Keep going.
Danae Hayes
When I'm alone It always treats me right Never too tired on a Friday
Heather McDonald
night
Danae Hayes
so I started doing, you know, like, parody songs, if you will, but they sound legit. And the production. And you have a nice voice. Thank you. And the production behind it sounds like it's.
Heather McDonald
You play the guitar, too.
Danae Hayes
No, I'm learning, and that shit's hard.
Heather McDonald
Oh, my God, it's so hard. Especially after I don't play any instruments or speak any languages. I don't know how people do either one of those.
Danae Hayes
I'm learning, but so I started doing the music stuff just to find another way to be creative. And that was when my agent, my now agent, called, and he was like, hey, I'd like to take a meeting with you. And I was just like, oh, my God, it's so hard to even get an agent's attention when you aren't out doing what you want to be doing to get the agent's attention.
Heather McDonald
Now, were you making any money online yet, being creative? Okay.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. This is. I had given up selling the Tupperware. The fitness stuff. Yeah, doing the fitness stuff. And I was solely 100% a content creator. And when he called me in his office, he was like, do you do standup? And it was like, me, him, and like 11 or 12 other guys at CAA. And I just thought in that moment, I was like, you can either tell the truth or you can fucking lie. And I lied. Good for you. I said, oh, yeah, I do it all the time. And he goes, really? Can we see some clips? And I was like, oh, I've actually never recorded any of my stuff, but I will next time. And he was like, well, what do you say if we do, like a tester run with you and book seven comedy clubs and just see how the tickets go and then we can reassess after that? And I was like, yeah, like, how long is my set? Like, 10, 15 minutes. And he was like, no, no, you're the headliner, so you get an hour. And I was like, oh, okay, great. Yeah, that's great. When do you want to do this? And he was like, two, three months? I was like, okay, cool. I left there, Heather, and I drove home and I was like, how many
Heather McDonald
followers did you have at this time that they thought that you had a big enough name that you could headline and sell out?
Danae Hayes
I want to say across Facebook, TikTok and Instagram, probably two and a half million at the time.
Heather McDonald
Oh, that is great.
Danae Hayes
And they were like, let's try it. So I drove home and it hit me. Number one, I've never done stand up. Number two, I've never done anything in front of a live crowd. And number three, how the hell do you write an hour long show? So I went home and I youtubed. How do you write a standup show? And like, nothing pulled up. And I was just like, do you
Heather McDonald
know, I just have to say, do you know that Sarah Silverman had a movie? Like, it was her standup movie. And this is probably like, I don't know, 15, 20 years ago. It was so funny. And it was basically that she has a show that night, but she hasn't prepared any material.
Danae Hayes
Yeah, I remember that. Yes.
Heather McDonald
It was so funny.
Danae Hayes
That was me.
Heather McDonald
This is crazy. So you looked it up? Yeah, I looked up and this is like, did you use AI?
Danae Hayes
No. How you chatgpt? Wasn't even a thing back then.
Heather McDonald
All right?
Danae Hayes
And so I was just like, what do I do? So I find this one guy on YouTube and he's like, sitting in like a basement, and I'm like, It's got like 50 views on it. So I'm like, this guy must not know what he's doing, but I have no direction.
Heather McDonald
Yeah.
Danae Hayes
And I didn't really have any friends doing stand up comedy, so I didn't have anybody to call.
Heather McDonald
So I know the rooms that the agents booked, they were in close enough for you to get to, or you were gonna have to, like, travel.
Danae Hayes
So it was Birmingham, Huntsville, Alabama, Nashville, Charlotte, and Greenville. Okay.
Heather McDonald
So a Southern thing.
Danae Hayes
And so, yeah, I could drive. And so this guy's just like, you know, just like right from the heart and just try to find good segues from one joke to the next. I was like, all right, fuck this. This didn't help at all. So I just sat down and I thought, well, how can I do this? And I just started writing things down.
Heather McDonald
It didn't scare you at all to think that you were going to get in front of people or throughout your life you were comfortable being, giving a speech in class or whatever?
Danae Hayes
As weird as this sounds, it. It didn't freak me out at all. The only part that freaked me out was I didn't really have a playbook of how to write it. So I ended up coming up with some material. And my first show was 90 minutes because I wrote way too fucking much and drew it way out.
Heather McDonald
So the first time you ever did stand up was you're headlining a place, you didn't try to get up any place locally for five minutes.
Danae Hayes
I didn't even think to do that. That's how fresh, green and brand new. I didn't even think to do that. In fact, I want to say a week before the first show, my agent was like, why don't you. Just so that we, you know, it's all new material, why don't we put you in like a 20 person room in this. This back lot of this improv comedy place called third coast comedy. And I was like, yeah, we could do that. And I'll just get my close friends and family. And he was like, yeah, or just post it online and see if anybody wants that ticket since you've already sold out the Nashville show. And I was like, okay. So I did. And you know, we got 20 people in there. And that was the 90 minute show. And then I had a week to kind of cut, you know, some fat off the bone. And then I went into the seven. The seven comedy clubs, which, yeah, once I got on stage, I was vibing. I was like, this is the most addicting feeling I've ever had in my life. But I don't know if I. If what I know now, if I knew it back then, I don't think I would have agreed to it because it's just sometimes you can know too much and it'll keep you from saying yes. But I didn't know anything, so I said yes.
Heather McDonald
Now, have you gotten any hate or heard about hate from comedians that obviously, I know comedians that have been doing this for 30 years that have some definite bitterness towards a TikTok sensation that's taking stage time from people that are classically trained. Though there's no classic we're not ballerinas, there is no playbook for standup. But there's definitely a way that, you know, previous generations did it, which is you start with five minutes, you start with 10, you become a feature, you become, you know, move your way into headlining, you've done, you know, you do the road for a few years, then you get your Tonight show and. But no formula works anymore. And I say that to people too. People told me I could not start standup in la. They're like, what do you mean you can't start being a standup in la? I'm like, well, I'm born and raised
Danae Hayes
here, so what else do you.
Heather McDonald
So my trajectory was different than someone else's as well. So that's why I'm like, I don't. I've never felt a bitterness towards that. I'm like, you do you boo. Make it work. I have noticed over the years, though, that certain there was a time when YouTubers, they did like a YouTube tour and stuff and that didn't seem to work because those YouTube people for most part were very comfortable being alone in the room and editing. And it was funny because of the editing, right? And without the possible, you know, a little bit of training of the stand up, it was. Maybe a couple people made it like Trisha Paytas. I told the story, but I did a thing where she. It was years ago and it was like this on some weird network that doesn't exist anymore. And they're like, we want to pair a real standup with a YouTuber and see if they can do standup. And I got Glozell and she had already done some standup, but that was like a secret. So she already liked. She was funny, she was easy, whatever. And Trisha Paytas went up there and I didn't know who she was. I just thought she was just like this sexy little adorable thing. And, you know, she went up there and she was very. She's pretty dirty. And because nobody had much prep time, like you only had like a few, maybe we met like three times. Or something. And so anyway, afterwards she, we were in the green room and she's like, should I start doing standup? And all of a sudden there's all this candy in front of her. And I go, where did you get all that candy? And she goes, oh, my fans brought me candy because that's what I do on my YouTube. I just sit and eat candy and talking to the camera and I go, and you have a million whatever, you're making money. I'm like, fuck the standup. Eat the candy in your living room. Why would you ever want to stress about this? Well now, 15 years later, she's doing so amazing and she does a stage show. But this thing that she's doing now, the singing and the stage show is better suited for her, you know what I mean? And she's doing great, but it's like, it's that kind of a thing. So that was a long winded thing. But have you had to defend yourself among against some traditional standups that might be a little bitter towards you?
Danae Hayes
No, not directly, but I know that that energy is out there and I just don't associate with it. Only because if like we're not doctors exactly, we don't have to go to school for this shit.
Heather McDonald
You don't have to be a certified stand up.
Danae Hayes
Either you're funny or you're not funny.
Heather McDonald
Right.
Danae Hayes
And so, and there's all different kinds.
Heather McDonald
There's storytelling, there's jokes, there, you know, there's all different kinds of ways of being funny. There's people who do all impressions, there's people who do all characters. I mean like, you'll only talk to the audience like a Matt Rife. Somebody else would say, that's not real, Stan.
Danae Hayes
There's a thousand ways to cut the pot. And one of the greatest athletes I've ever played with in my life, she was a four time all American and an Olymp that I played with at Alabama. But we also were from the same hometown, so we went to high school together, middle school together, travel ball together. She didn't start playing until she was 12 years old. That is so late. Everybody starts playing. If you want to go be an Olympian, you start when you're four. She started when she was 12, but she was naturally good at it. And I remember when we took her on the team, the other players parents were just up in arms about it. They were like, this kid is raw talent. We've invested thousands in our child. How is she gonna get to start over my kid? And then eventually the stats just don't lie. And it's like she could just do it. She just had a different path to get there.
Heather McDonald
So I think on that note, the goalie of the USA team of hockey, his story was something like that. He wasn't the chosen kid in high school that got to go to the special school for grooming the best hockey players to the, you know, even the college I think he went to was in Division 1. And then, you know, he's like the greatest goalie ever.
Danae Hayes
Yeah, I mean there's, everybody has their own unique story and I think the cream always rises to the top. And so if somebody has been doing it for 20 or 30 years and maybe, you know, they're wondering like, why isn't my career where I want it to be? I truly believe my dad's always said the cream will always rise to the top. You just have to. It's the people who quit that aren't going to figure it out. And you know that naturally great person that is beating the comedy club's doors down on open mic nights and then, and then doing it the, if you will, the traditional old fashioned way, they will get where they're supposed to go. But this new generation of like the kids that are, you know, in their teens right now, social media is all that they know and so that's what's going to break everybody. And it's like AI now in the sense of like you can hate AI, which I do. But if you don't adapt and learn how to use AI to help you, like my mom's a real estate agent
Heather McDonald
and oh, I came from a real estate agent family too. I was a realtor.
Danae Hayes
I was too. I read that about you.
Heather McDonald
Yeah, I was a realtor too.
Danae Hayes
And I, I've had to remind her like mom, you need to learn to how to ask, chat, GPT, how to market yourself in your particular demographic. She's like, but it's scares me, I don't know how to use it. And I was like, you're either going to have to learn how to use it or you're going to get left behind. And so that's why I just, I was like, social media, I'm not going to ever view it as a bad thing for me because like, like Trisha, my fans have learned to just like follow me through their phone screens and they have this parasocial relationship with me and so when they get to see me live, it's such a treat for them because they've been seeing me so much on their phone screens. So it is totally different. And I respect, I have to always say this. I respect the traditional old fashioned way. I have so much respect for people that do that and have done that and that's how they've gotten to where they are. But I know that we also have to adapt and know that social media comes with so many perks and it doesn't make one less valuable over the other.
Heather McDonald
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Danae Hayes
Right.
Heather McDonald
You know, and what I would also say is what people don't realize is how much work goes into being an influencer. Posting sketches, the editing this, that. And so for the person that's just doing the comedy clubs and kind of bitter that they whatever, only have, you know, 500 followers. Yeah, because you're not posting five times a day and you're not coming home and you're not having someone film your set and then spending Nobody. You know, a lot of people don't like to watch themselves back. Well, you have to. And you have to cut it up and you have to post it and everything. One of the things that was interesting, again, the traditional thing of this, the first time I did stand up, it was like after a little like six week show. And I loved that. Cause I knew I had to do it. But much like you, I had a deadline. I would have never done it had I not had a deadline. And it was this little show at the end and everybody's coming and everyone's excited to come because I have my USC friends and my high school friends and my parents going to the Santa Monica Improv. It doesn't exist anymore. So I'm like, okay, here's my deadline. I'm gonna do it. So after that it went really well. And everybody's like, oh. And somebody gives me this agent's info. I call him and somehow I got him on the phone and I'm like, oh yeah, I just did this class and I just had this fun. And he said, well, first of all, nobody in the industry should see your standup after two until you've done it for two years. And because if you suck, they'll always remember that first time that you sucked. Which Is kind of true, too. So I'm like, well, how do you tell someone that's starting to do standup not to film it and put it out there, right? Because they think everybody, you know, how could you not? I filmed what I had on my yogurt this morning. What do you mean? I'm gonna do stand up and not put that up? But I do think for some people, you know, you could wait on that a little bit or do very shorter clips.
Danae Hayes
No, I've had people on my team be like, let's. Let's, you know, try to get a special in the works. And I'm like, I'm only on year three of doing standup right now. There's no rush. I want to do this for the rest of my life. So let's continue to, you know, pound the pavement and get out there. I think I did 120 shows on my first tour. I was like. And that was the best thing I could have ever done because I got so many reps in. But, yeah, I don't want to blow my load too fast, you know, and, yeah, and put, you know, something that maybe I'm proud of right now, but that I have no idea how much more growth I can have out into the universe before I'm ready. Because, you know, we're just getting started. So it's like, let's just be cautious about that.
Heather McDonald
I remember when I was doing the improv, this is like, you know, I'm in my 20s and all these guys started to talk shit about me. And they're like, she's packing the audience. Because I actually had friends.
Danae Hayes
Yeah, okay.
Heather McDonald
These fucking losers didn't have any friends.
Danae Hayes
Losers.
Heather McDonald
I actually had friends. And they were really excited to come out at 8pm on a Thursday night to see me. They were also laughing at all the other people. So you should be fucking grateful I brought these people, you know? But they tried to act like, oh, I'm not actually funny because I, again, only been doing it like a year or two years, and I'm able to fill a room out when I do 10 or 20 minutes. And that was really annoying.
Danae Hayes
I think softball, and I hate to keep bringing it up, but I think bring up softball. I think being such a ultra competitive person, sports taught me so much about, you know, having a jealous teammate or having a teammate you can't get along with or having a teammate that wants to play the position that you're just naturally better at and, like, learning how to navigate those relationships. Whereas, like, when I got into the Comedy world. If something like that happened to me, it just didn't bother me any. Or if they, you know, said, oh, she hasn't been doing this long enough to deserve what she has. It just. I just put my. My, my brain just goes right back to playing at the highest level of softball and having to deal with 18 other women on one team.
Heather McDonald
Yeah.
Danae Hayes
And they all want to play and they all want to start, but there's only nine positions. And I don't know, I don't. I don't really let myself get too worried about what other people's opinions are of me just because I just love what I do so much. And the only time I think I've ever fallen into that trap was after my divorce, where it was a personal thing, not a professional thing. Because, like, no matter what somebody says about my talent, I just don't believe them. Whether it's good or bad, I just. I don't crave affirmation and I don't crave criticism. Only because I never was like that in softball, but I just played the game and wanted to be great at it.
Heather McDonald
Did you still play for fun?
Danae Hayes
No. Hell no. Hell no.
Heather McDonald
That's always very interesting. Me too. Okay, so I'm the most non athletic person as the last pick for every team. Back then they used to pick teams like at the pe, which was only once a week because it was Catholic school. And it was just so stressful to me. I just started playing pickleball. Hence the outfit. Thank God. I want to get into this. Oh, I'm sure you'd. I'm sure if we played one game, by the second game, you'd kill me. I've never played athletic people, tennis people. Guys.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
Playing against a guy.
Danae Hayes
Now the tick tocks of these competitive pickleball tournaments, though, like, y' all get really mad at each other out there.
Heather McDonald
Well, I'm not at that level at all. I'm just happy to, like, return the ball and have fun. And now I'm like, now I'm getting a little better. I'm like, okay, now the only way I like to play now is girls that are all at my level. Or if we play guys, it has to be the guys have to match and the girls have to match, and then we play with a guy that's not your husband, and then you can. Then I can. That's a pretty good.
Danae Hayes
So it's like swingers. Yes. Yeah.
Heather McDonald
And. Cause it can be a lot of, you know, it's not good. Like, for example, like, I finally was Starting to feel like I can't believe that I can play a sport. I mean, I'm telling you, I could never play a sport.
Danae Hayes
You look so athletic. Like, you look like you would have been a volleyball player.
Heather McDonald
And I'm tall. But also, I didn't start young. And so because my mom worked and I was youngest of five, like, I wasn't doing sports or anything. And then, then I just was like. Wanted to be like in the theater or whatever. And so. But I was like, God, mom, if you would have put me on that soccer team at 4, like, I wouldn't be so fucking lame now, you know, Like, I totally believed in, like, you better start early. So anyway, the pickleball started and I was like, oh, my God, this is like a million times easier than tennis. I think I can be okay. And then the first time I went, right away this woman was like, mean and just like annoyed that like I didn't hit the ball back or whatever.
Danae Hayes
Oh my God.
Heather McDonald
And it took like. It was like I was immediately, at 8 years old, feeling lame. And I'm like, I just don't think that non athlete. I don't think athletic people understand what it's like when you're not athletic, because it comes so easy to you that
Danae Hayes
you're like, I'm guilty of that.
Heather McDonald
And it's the same. And I would say, you know, this doesn't apply to you because you also are great on stage. But I'm saying one time I said, you know, would you make every kid in the class sing a solo?
Danae Hayes
You wouldn't, right?
Heather McDonald
So why would you expect every kid to want to play performatively? People are watching you miss the ball, right? The whole everyone. It's just fucking horrible.
Danae Hayes
Right?
Heather McDonald
And so it's like. So I started playing pickleball. And. And so, like, I actually like it. And I can play pretty good and I can carry on a game in a rally. And this, for the first time in my life, I can actually play a sport.
Danae Hayes
So.
Heather McDonald
So that is why that's. I like it.
Danae Hayes
Can you.
Heather McDonald
But it is easy for everybody. Everybody can pick it up.
Danae Hayes
Is it singles too? Or is it just double?
Heather McDonald
Your aunt really do single.
Danae Hayes
See, that's where my competitive nature comes in is like, I don't want to have to rely on anybody. Like, put me out there by myself. That's why I love golf. Do you play golf? You should get into golf.
Heather McDonald
No, we play golf.
Danae Hayes
Okay. Cause I was about to say, if you like pickleball.
Heather McDonald
Yeah. My husband and son are really been Good at golf. And I'm just starting to play and
Danae Hayes
you don't have to rely on that.
Heather McDonald
Yeah, that's what I also liked. I also liked that when my son first started to play it, I was like, oh, my God, he's competing against somebody. And he's like, wow, that was a great shot. And I was like, oh, you just don't see that in any other sport because you're really just playing with yourself.
Danae Hayes
100%.
Heather McDonald
Yeah. And that's stand up too. That's the other thing of when you know. Cause I did come from, you know, sketch too. Sketch and improv and plays. And what I loved about standup is I was like, you only need yourself and a mic and you don't. If you have a partner and they don't feel well, they're pregnant, they get another job. Oh, now how do we do this little two person play or whatever it is. And so that is also what I love about standup. And it is such a unique talent, especially with so many people having podcasts and stuff. Not very few people can actually talk for an hour by themselves and be entertaining and be funny. And so it is a great thing that you are doing it. I think that's awesome.
Danae Hayes
My best friend, his name's John, he'd never done standup before, but he's truly one of the most naturally funny people I've ever met. And so I had four comedy shows at a comedy club to kick the tour off. And I was like, hey, John, I got 15 minutes at the top if you want to take it. And he was like, really? And I was like, yeah. He's like, done. I'm down. And this was probably, I don't know, maybe a month before the show. And we got there and he just went out there and you, Honestly, Heather, you would have thought, like, this guy's just been kicking ass at comedy clubs and open mic nights for years. And that also reminded me that, like, a lot of times you're just put on this earth to do what you're supposed to do and, you know, it's up to you to find it. And sometimes we find it later in life, sometimes we find it when we're four years old. But seeing John do that and do it so well and just find a rhythm and go up there, like, he wasn't even nervous and it was annoying. I was like, how are you not nervous? I thought I was gonna have a heart attack the two seconds leading up to my first show. And he was just cool as a cucumber. And now he's like, I want to do this. And I'm like, well, let's get it done, you know?
Heather McDonald
And the same thing goes for someone that is spending all that time posting or, you know, doing something in the creative arts online that isn't getting the views. It's like, well, do it for as long as you enjoy doing it. Because that's the thing. Like, when I would be auditioning and things like that, and I wasn't really making money at it at first, and once in a while I'd be dating somebody and be like, my God, since I've been dating you, you've gone on so many auditions. Have you booked any of them? And I'm like, no, I never do. That's the fun of it.
Danae Hayes
I never know.
Heather McDonald
I never know if this is gonna be the one. I get so excited just to have an audition.
Danae Hayes
I know.
Heather McDonald
I never expect a callback. I'm like, that's not why. I'm like, I'm not doing it. I just go to the next thing and I go, but if I ever feel I don't want to do it anymore, then I won't. But, like, you enjoying the journey then just enjoy the journey. There's no, like, oh, and then once you turn 30, go hurl yourself off a building and stop doing it. Like, what are you talking about? Like, there is no timeline for it, which is really. Which is really cool.
Danae Hayes
Auditioning is like, literally, it's gotta feel like taking heroin.
Heather McDonald
Have you auditioned at all? So much stuff.
Danae Hayes
Yeah, just started doing some self tapes over the past year and just self taping alone. I'm just addicted to that. Acting has always been like the pinnacle. I've just always been like, I want to do the Robin Williams, Eddie Murphy style where they get to play themselves or a character like themselves and then play a character like the Nutty professor or Mrs. Doubtfire. And yeah, so just auditioning alone has been just so fucking fun.
Heather McDonald
And have you had any, like, childhood friends or anything that, like, secretly or you found out that they were like, not thrilled with your success and then you realized they weren't a friend?
Danae Hayes
Oh, yeah, yeah. Not. Not like close friends that, like, I would go out to dinner with now, but, like, people that I went to college with just kind of like started mass unfollowing me once I. Once I started doing well and I'd like, you know, start liking their pictures and then I would realize, oh, they don't even follow me. And I'm like, what the fuck? Like, what did I do? You know, and yeah, that shit's real. It's so real.
Heather McDonald
I saw this girl, I just started following her and she told. She popped up on my page today, and she goes, I'm going to an event with three friends I'm no longer friends with.
Danae Hayes
And what happened?
Heather McDonald
She goes, I started to. She was a lawyer, but she started to do some online stuff. And she kind of literally was like, I want to kind of build this and like, whatever, give this advice or whatever she was into doing, talking about. And she's like a young girl. And so she said, all my friends. And these are like a handful, you know, friends from high school. First, I want to say she had one friend that would like everything, share it. Even had multiple accounts to like and share.
Danae Hayes
Okay, yeah.
Heather McDonald
Then she had these other friends that they would watch her thing because then they would ask her about it. They were like, oh, my God, that. That story about that date. What happened? Da, da. So she knew they were watching it, but then she would check because she was. It's so in the infantile stages that they were never liking it. So then she was like, well, maybe they don't understand how this works. So she's like, hey, you know, it really helps me if you like and share and comment and, you know, and save it or, you know, anything like that really helps me. And they turned on her and were like, what? Why do we have to do that? Like, you're annoying. And then so finally she was kind of like, well, then maybe we can't like, really be friends or whatever. And then somebody wrote like, I can't believe to her. Someone wrote like, I can't believe you're gonna end a friendship over a like or a lack there of a like. And then the friend liked that. No, the one thing she liked was the mean comment. And I'm like, well, there's no more evidence that you need than that is somebody who would is dancing on your grave. But you're alive 100, so just know
Danae Hayes
they're not your friends.
Heather McDonald
Really bad happened to you. They might show up with a casserole or they may go, huh? But their initial first thought is, yeah, yeah, yeah, they're waiting to boo you and they're jealous. And this is something what I do, what you do, what content creators do, what influencers do among women. It is something that a lot of people can enjoy and like. But a lot of people feel like it looks easy and they could do it too.
Danae Hayes
That's amazing.
Heather McDonald
And because they're not doing it, they get. But like, I found some of my haters are fucking hilarious. And I go, oh, that's why you hate me, because you're really fucking funny.
Danae Hayes
Exactly.
Heather McDonald
And didn't pursue it.
Danae Hayes
Exactly. Yeah. It's always, I wish I was doing what they're doing.
Heather McDonald
Yeah.
Danae Hayes
But I. And, you know, I read a quote one time, it said, go where you're envious. And this was back during my, you know, fitness and real estate days. And I hated what I was doing. I tried pharmaceutical sales. I did real estate. I did all that too, though, sports broadcasting. And I just was not fulfilled. Then I read this quote, and it said, go where you're envious. And I started researching the Groundlings, and I was just like, I want to do that so bad because I love sketch comedy, I love improv, I love all that shit. But I was just like, I'm from Alabama. People from Alabama don't move to LA and do that. So I just stopped thinking about it. But every time I would see a comedian online, like, I just kind of started becoming like, oh, I wish that was me. And I was like, finally, denae, buck up. If that's what you wanna do, go. Go fucking do it. You know, I just don't think a lot of people, like, I didn't. I didn't have the confidence to go out and do it at the beginning. So instead, I would just be like, well, I wish that was me instead. But I wasn't doing anything about it.
Heather McDonald
So you have a very cute girlfriend in the. In the outside. And I mean, not outside, we're in the closet.
Danae Hayes
She doesn't.
Heather McDonald
No, she's in the other room.
Danae Hayes
She's in the closet.
Heather McDonald
So you started telling me about how you guys met. I was like, wait, I want to save it for the show. So tell me how you guys met.
Danae Hayes
Oh, man. Well, first time I met her, it was a very casual, hey, how's it going? I met her at a friend's. Friend's house, a mutual friend. And I was like, what do you do? And she's like, I'm an actress. And I was like, oh, my gosh, I would love to get into acting. I was like, I know nothing about it. And she was like, what's your email? I was like, this. And she goes, okay, I'm going to send you everything, all the resources for Nashville acting that you need. So, sure enough, about four or five
Heather McDonald
days later, that's when I would have known that she was interested in you, because no other straight actress would help another straight actress with anything.
Danae Hayes
See, I didn't know that. Now I know, now I know. But I was also married at the time, so it was like very, like platonic and just like very. Just kinda.
Heather McDonald
Well, still it shows that she's a nice person.
Danae Hayes
Very nice person. Yeah. She loves to help people.
Heather McDonald
So unusual in Hollywood. So. Yeah. But I guess in the south, it's. That's different.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. And she's from Wisconsin. She's just a sweet.
Heather McDonald
Oh, that's where my mom's from.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. Just sweet Midwestern girl.
Heather McDonald
Yeah.
Danae Hayes
And then we ran back into each other. I had gotten a divorce. At this point. We were at the American Country Music Awards in Texas and I was like, I'm obsessed with you. You were the hottest thing I've ever laid eyes on.
Heather McDonald
And you said all that?
Danae Hayes
No, in my mind.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
I'm not that bold.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
I'm not that bold. I probably acted really stupid in front of her. And she. We hit it off. We started hanging out at the ACMs and then two days later she was like, I'm gonna fly to Memphis and surprise you at your show. She told my friend that and she did. She surprised me. And that was.
Heather McDonald
And at that point, you haven't, you haven't acted like you like her more than a friend.
Danae Hayes
I was flirting with her. But I've known Jen for a while. At that point, I think that was probably three years and she'd only dated guys.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
And so I just thought, you know, this is just gonna be, for me, like, this is gonna be something that gets me through another hard week, is to just be excited about this girl that I'll never have a chance with.
Heather McDonald
Okay.
Danae Hayes
Come to find out, she was like, I've never had feelings for a woman in my life.
Heather McDonald
Now how does she say that to you?
Danae Hayes
She.
Heather McDonald
So she goes to the show.
Danae Hayes
She goes to the show.
Heather McDonald
We do. Does it make you nervous when you have people you know come to your show or does that make you even do a better show?
Danae Hayes
It depends. Like, my mom and my sister have never seen me do standup. And the first time they saw me was last week at the Ryman. That was a little nerve wracking. Just because I.
Heather McDonald
You wanted to do such a great show.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. And it's such an amazing, you know, venue. But yeah, I would say I was really nervous when Jen came, just. Cause I was like, I want her to think I'm so cool and hot. And she liked the show. She loved it. We went out on Bourbon street. Or not Bourbon Street, Beale street afterwards. I wouldn't Recommend that. At 2 o' clock in the morning. But we did it. We held hands at a bar. I was like, I got this on lock. I was like, I'm locked.
Heather McDonald
So now you're like, now? Have you dated other girls? That you were their first girl?
Danae Hayes
I dated one girl in college. I was her first girlfriend. And she was so sweet. We took it so slow. But Jen is just different. Jen is just like the most godly woman on the planet. She is just so Christlike and, like, you don't enjoy cursing in front of her. Cause it makes you feel bad now.
Heather McDonald
I cursed a few times during this show.
Danae Hayes
I cursed. Fuck. You know, Damn. Now no gds in front of her. That's where she draws the line.
Heather McDonald
Okay?
Danae Hayes
So I just, you know, I just wanted her to. I wanted to feel like I was good enough to date her. It was the first time in my life where I felt like I needed to be. I needed to, like, be better in order to date somebody. She's like, Hobby Lobby. She is Hobby Lobby if Hobby Lobby was a person. She's just sweet and kind and live, laugh, love.
Heather McDonald
And.
Danae Hayes
Yeah, I just took it. Really. She actually kissed me first. I wouldn't kiss her because I. I don't know, I just felt weird about doing it.
Heather McDonald
And then what was that like for her then, to share you with the world?
Danae Hayes
It was tough because People magazine wanted to break it. And she was like, I feel like everybody's telling me I need to come out, but I don't. I don't feel like I need to come out anywhere because I've never known I was gay. I just fell in love with you, Danae. Like, I don't even view you as, like, a woman. I just view you as a soul. So she's like, it feels weird that I have to use the word coming out when that's never really been my story. And she told her parents that she liked me. The day after the ACMs, she sat him down at breakfast and was like, I have a crush on Danae Hayes. I was like, oh, it was that easy. My parents put me in a concentration camp. You know, like that. That's how you do it. She's like, yeah, but we're from Wisconsin. And I'm like, so you gonna eat cheese while you do it? Like, what the fuck does that mean? Yeah, like, my parents. Yeah. Put me on a breathing tube out in the middle of the woods and was like, until you change and get the devil out of you, don't come home. You know?
Heather McDonald
And so we have so they were cool. Her parents were cool.
Danae Hayes
Their only reservation was that I sing a song called Dick in My Nightstand.
Heather McDonald
They wanted you to sing the song for them.
Danae Hayes
No, they didn't like that I sing.
Heather McDonald
Oh, they didn't like the song.
Danae Hayes
They were like, oh, she sings a song called Dick in My Nightstand. Mm. Not. Not that I've got tits, so that's where that went. But, yeah, I'm obsessed with her. She's just. Yeah. I would marry her today, like, if I could find a chapel to marry that girl today. Like, I love her, so I just cherish her.
Heather McDonald
Right.
Danae Hayes
I just.
Heather McDonald
But when. When I. When you came, I'm like, oh, and you're married again or something. And you said, I'm not that gay. Or you said, I'm gay, but I'm not that. Oh, yeah. How did you say you were like,
Danae Hayes
oh, so you're married again? And I was like, well, I'm gay, but I'm not that gay.
Heather McDonald
Y.
Danae Hayes
Because lesbians tend to, like, u haul it the next day.
Heather McDonald
Right?
Danae Hayes
And here we are, we've been dating 11 months, and I'm already like, I want to marry her again. But yeah. Yeah, I guess I am pretty gay. I'm pretty gay, I guess.
Heather McDonald
And if you were to get married, what would you wear?
Danae Hayes
I don't know.
Heather McDonald
I love lesbian wedding outfits. Yeah, I love that. Sometimes it just. I don't know, I just like it.
Danae Hayes
I don't like dresses.
Heather McDonald
Yeah, I love it that sometimes one wears a dress, one doesn't. Sometimes both wear suits. Sometimes both wear the same dress. I don't know. I think it's kind of fun.
Danae Hayes
I just can't imagine myself being in a dress. I hate dresses.
Heather McDonald
Well, obviously, you should wear what's cool for you.
Danae Hayes
I'd probably wear, like a feminine suit, maybe. I don't know.
Heather McDonald
I think with your body, you should wear a.
Danae Hayes
Give it to me.
Heather McDonald
Okay. I think you should wear, like, imagine J. Lo in a sexy white pantsuit. I think you should wear a tight pants.
Danae Hayes
She's got a little bit bigger of an ass than I do.
Heather McDonald
Well, I think you should go with like a shorter. Like. Like it's tight, but it's a shorter leg. And then something very, like a lacy, like, wear the lace bodysuit underneath.
Danae Hayes
Yes.
Heather McDonald
And then a very nipped in, like, cute jacket, but, like, short. The jacket will only hit you to the mid hip and nip you in at the waist.
Danae Hayes
I'm just gonna call you when this happens. Heather, would you style me for my wedding?
Heather McDonald
Yeah. And then the. And Then, I mean, you wear boots, so you.
Danae Hayes
I don't.
Heather McDonald
I don't really want you wearing cowboy boots.
Danae Hayes
I don't think I'll wear cowboy boots.
Heather McDonald
I want to do just a sexy white pump, because with the short capri pant.
Danae Hayes
Okay, yeah. Just. I'll give you a holler. And you just come on down to Nashville. And when people ask, what are you doing? I'm styling a lesbian for her wedding.
Heather McDonald
Y. I want to style lesbians for their weddings. Yeah, I can love that. I just love it.
Danae Hayes
I just can't imagine me wearing a dress because that I'm not. I kind of have a hard time, like, deciding where I'm at on, like, the spectrum of femininity and masculinity, because it's like my energy is more masculine. Like, the bros love me, and I love the bros, but I'm not very feminine. But I don't dress super masculine, But I also don't dress very feminine. I'm somewhere in the. What are the kids calling that androgynous nowadays? I guess I'm androgynous.
Heather McDonald
I don't think you are at all, though.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
Because this outfit and everything is super cute.
Danae Hayes
Maybe I've mind fucked myself into that.
Heather McDonald
Yeah, you're like.
Danae Hayes
You're not androgynous at all.
Heather McDonald
No, not at all. Like, I was like, yeah. When I was, like, looking you up, I was like, oh. Like, I wouldn't have.
Danae Hayes
Oh, she doesn't look like she works at Home Depot. This is awesome. My mom was so afraid I was gonna work at Home Depot when I came out.
Heather McDonald
Why Home Depot?
Danae Hayes
That's the only time she interacts with lesbians. She's like, I saw a lesbian today at Home Depot. I'm like, oh, no. Where else did you see him? That's really only place I see him.
Heather McDonald
Do you have any desire to be a mother?
Danae Hayes
To be my mother?
Heather McDonald
No. To be a mother?
Danae Hayes
Yes. Yeah.
Heather McDonald
Very cool.
Danae Hayes
I know. I better get started, though, because I don't know if I want to have a child once I get close to 40. Like, I just. I want to be able to. You know, that kid should be able to go take a piss and a by itself at that point without me having to change its diaper.
Heather McDonald
Well, I don't think 40, you know, 40. I was done by the time I was 35. And I think that's the perfect time because now my kids are grown, and I sometimes think I am so glad. Like, sometimes just like I got on a Tuesday night or something, I'm like, I'm so glad I don't have, like, Boy Scouts. And, like, I just think there's a time in your life, you know, and everybody's thing is different. And because of medicine, you can have children much older and all that. But I'm just like, yeah, there's a certain point where I'm like, I'm really glad I'm not at the welcome back night at school. And the times that I did it, it was really fun, and I had the energy to do it. I don't know how I did.
Danae Hayes
I just. In my mind, I feel like 35 is kind of like where I would want to start having that conversation.
Heather McDonald
I think it's the. For me, it was sort of the ideal time, but everybody's different on their timeline, you know, and, like, I feel like there's a big movement of people getting married and having kids really young again, which is like my age. It was like, like, oh, everyone got married at 29 to 30. Every single person.
Danae Hayes
Oh, my mom was married at 20. Yeah.
Heather McDonald
Yeah. And. But now I feel like there's like, a move, like, movement of, you know, younger people.
Danae Hayes
And I was like, mom, what were you doing? You were 20 years old, and dad was 21. And y' all decided the next year,
Heather McDonald
how many kids are in your family?
Danae Hayes
Two. I was like. And they popped a kid out at 22. And I'm like, so your parents.
Heather McDonald
So your parents are really young?
Danae Hayes
My parents are really young, yeah. My mom is. Is 57, I think, and my dad is 59.
Heather McDonald
Has anyone ever thought you were a couple with your dad or anything?
Danae Hayes
No. That would be weird. Heather.
Heather McDonald
Well, it's happened. It's happened to me twice.
Danae Hayes
No.
Heather McDonald
With Drake.
Danae Hayes
Stop.
Heather McDonald
And it's the greatest compliment because I had him.
Danae Hayes
I'm sure he loves it.
Heather McDonald
I had him at 30, you know, over 30. I had him. So I didn't have him at 18.
Danae Hayes
Stop.
Heather McDonald
The story was the best one. We were in Salt Lake City, you know, which is a little funky, and. But we're a nice hotel, and we have time before the show. And so it was like a little happy hour. So we were sitting next to each other so he could watch the game. And there was this couple to my right, and the guy was kind of like hipster, like, tattooed. He had those big earrings, you know, make your lobes. Yeah. And she was older, but she wasn't like me older, like, with, like, Botox and, like, hair. Like, she was looking kind of.
Danae Hayes
Your skin is flawless, by the way. I was sharing it the whole time. Thank You.
Heather McDonald
She was looking kind of older, okay? Like, flat hair and whatever.
Danae Hayes
And at one point, was she older or just haggard?
Heather McDonald
I don't know, because it was Salt Lake City. But she was clearly older than this guy. Okay, like, by, like, Mormons.
Danae Hayes
Y' all need to care more.
Heather McDonald
By, like 20 years.
Danae Hayes
Put yourselves together.
Heather McDonald
And at one point, she's talking to lol, and she put her hand on his chest, and I'm thinking, oh, I thought that was her son. That seems a little touchy. But maybe she's like, son, get a job. I don't know what she was doing, okay? So then I'm sitting there with. With Drake, and we're talking, we're sharing food. I'm like, do you want that? Whatever. And then she looks over at me. He goes to the bathroom. She looks over at me. She goes, goes, can I ask you something? And I thought she was gonna say, are you Heather McDonald? Or whatever. And she goes, are you guys together? It makes me so excited.
Danae Hayes
Okay?
Heather McDonald
See, I'm like, right? But to the parent, it's actually flattering. To the kid, it's like, you wanna fucking barf? But to the. I'm like. I go, oh, no, he's my son. Well, now I know this isn't her son. And she's like, oh, I thought we just had something in common. I go, oh, is that your boyfriend? She's like, no, he's my husband. But he really looks. He's actually a lot older than he looks. I'm like, oh, okay. She's like, I just thought maybe we could hang out or something.
Danae Hayes
And I'm like, no, she's asking you to swing.
Heather McDonald
Yeah. The other time it happened was in Houston. We were at this airport hotel in Houston on the road, and this guy, which is, by the way, Houston is, like, such a creepy place to be because of that airport, I think is, like, number one trafficking. Whatever. It was freaking me out. And so we're there and, like, we go to the. And already, like, Drake was like. He gets annoyed if I want to, like, ask someone an opinion, a question. That's a human. Because this generation doesn't think any human knows anything.
Danae Hayes
Yeah.
Heather McDonald
So I'm like, give me a minute. Like, I want to ask the lady, because we just found a shit in our hotel room and I want to get another room.
Danae Hayes
You found a what?
Heather McDonald
We did find an actual shit in the hotel room.
Danae Hayes
Like somebody shit in the carpet.
Heather McDonald
I don't know if it was a dog or what. So we switch it. And then. So now we're Back. We had that incident. We came back. Now we're in the hotel bar and we're eating, and now we're kind of laughing because, like, now we had a beer, some food, and we're. I don't have a show that night, so, like, everything's fine. And this guy comes up and he's out. Oh, my God. I saw you all fighting, and then you went upstairs and had some bacon up sex. And now you're laughing. And I was like, again, so happy. I'm like, you think I'm young enough that this is my also boyfriend?
Danae Hayes
What guy just comes up to somebody's like, oh, she all went up there and around, and now you're back. And I go.
Heather McDonald
And then Drake goes, well, what you didn't see, mom, is that he had like four beers while we were sitting here. Four shots or something. I'm like, I don't care that he was wasted and seeing double. He thought I was young enough to pull you.
Danae Hayes
Drake is just catching strays. Every time he goes home, my friend
Heather McDonald
goes, but do you also think that Drake looks a lot older than he is? I go, well, maybe that's the case, but it's me.
Danae Hayes
How old is Drake if I hadn't.
Heather McDonald
You just finished college. He just got. He graduated from ASU last year.
Danae Hayes
I was gonna say 23. Yeah, yeah, I do get that. My mom and I look like sisters. Like, we'll go out to dinner. Oh, are y' all on a sister trip?
Heather McDonald
And I'm like, doesn't your mom see your mom?
Danae Hayes
Must love that. My mom eats it up.
Heather McDonald
It's the greatest thing ever.
Danae Hayes
And her accent is so cute. It's very nasally. And she's like, no, weird. I'm her mom.
Heather McDonald
I love it.
Danae Hayes
It's just so. I'm her mom. She just drowsy down.
Heather McDonald
Well, something. You know, I've had it happen because, you know, I just. In la and I have so many gay friends, gay male friends, that there's just been times where I just see a couple out and I just assume that they're two gay men together, you know, and the fact that they look alike and they have a big age difference doesn't mean anything because a lot of gay guys like to find, like, a younger version of themselves. There's a lot of sugar daddy stuff. And I just was trying this one, these two guys, and I'm like, oh, so how did you guys meet? And they're like, at birth. Like, this is my dad. And I was like, oh. I was like, I thought you guys were just like a. Like a well dressed, you know, May December gay couple. Like, I was like, oh, I forgot, like that there's streets walking.
Danae Hayes
I have a game that I play when I'm back home in Alabama. And it's. Are they gay or are they just southern men? Because southern men dress super gay. Yes. Like, they wear the 5 inch seam shorts with like a seersucker suit and
Heather McDonald
like all that stuff and pink.
Danae Hayes
And a lot of them, they, the.
Heather McDonald
The voice sounds gay.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. They'll be like tonight.
Heather McDonald
The southern voice sounds very gay on a man.
Danae Hayes
Yes, it does. And they always, they're just like, oh, tonight, it's so good to see you. You know, Tammy and I'd love to take you out to dinner sometime. And I'm like, do you and Tammy sleep in the same bed? And every choir director I've ever known in south is gay.
Heather McDonald
Like the Todd Chrisley.
Danae Hayes
You know what, Todd, if you're watching this brother, I. At this point, I believe you aren't gay.
Heather McDonald
I believe he's not gay either. He finally gave up. I was like, I really don't. I don't know. Or he did what your conversion therapist said. He thought about it, but he didn't rob the bank.
Danae Hayes
He ain't robbing that bank. Yeah, I think he might be straight for real. But that's what I'm saying. Is he gay or is he just a southern man?
Heather McDonald
Exactly.
Danae Hayes
That accent is so gay.
Heather McDonald
Danae, this was so much fun. I'm so glad that we got to sit down and talk. You have an incredible tour. Tell everybody where they can find it. You've got dates all the way through. Oh, my gosh. You have dates all through the end of May. You're going to Florida. You're going to Arkansas. You're going to North Carolina, Georgia, Texas, Colorado, Richmond, Virginia. Where are we? We still have Washington, D.C. nashville. No, Nashville. We already went to Washington D.C. richmond. Tell everybody where they can follow you.
Danae Hayes
Yeah. So, Dana Hayes dot com. Best ticket prices and then I'm on TikTok, Instagram, the Facebooks.
Heather McDonald
Dena Hayes, thank you so much. This is great.
Danae Hayes
Thank you, Heather.
Heather McDonald
Thanks.
Danae Hayes
Quick interruption worth hearing. If you love sports, TikTok is for you. Game highlights, expert breakdowns and fan reactions.
Heather McDonald
Just the moments that matter. Download TikTok now. Hey, sweetie. Your mother showed me this carvana thing for selling the car. I'm gonna give it a try. Wish me luck. Me again. I put in the license plate. It gave me an offer. Unbelievable. Okay, I accepted the offer. They're picking it up Tuesday from the driveway. I haven't even left my chair. It's done. The car is gone. I'm holding a check anyway. Carvana Give it a whirl. Love ya. So good you'll want to leave a voicemail about it. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pick up fees may apply. With Verbal's last minute deals, you can save over $50 on your spring getaway. So whether it's a mountain escape with friends, a family week at the beach, or sightseeing in a new city, there's still time to get great discounts.
Danae Hayes
Book your next day now.
Heather McDonald
Average savings $72.00 select homes only. Family.
Date: April 2, 2026
Host: Heather McDonald
Guest: Danae Hays
This episode of Juicy Scoop dives into the journey of comedian Danae Hays—a tall, outgoing, Southern, happy lesbian—who has quickly built an online following and successful stand-up career. Heather and Danae unpack the nuances of being a female, gay comic from Alabama, the intersections of Southern culture and personal identity, starting stand-up in the digital age, handling haters and jealous friends, and cultivating happiness in love and life.
On Coming Out and Conversion Therapy
On Jealously and Online Haters
On Starting Standup with Zero Experience
On Choosing Her Own Path
On Being a Woman in Comedy
On Love and Labels
On Southern Stereotypes
The episode is candid, sometimes irreverent, filled with Southern wit, self-deprecating humor, and touching personal anecdotes. Danae brings infectious energy and resilience, while Heather mixes warmth, teasing, and lived industry insight.
Where to Follow Danae Hays:
[Episode ends at ~80:00 with tour plugs and gratitude.]