Are We the Bad Examples?

Summary

Podcast Summary: Karma & Chaos — "Are We The Bad Examples?"

Podcast: Karma & Chaos with Kail Lowry & Becky Hayter
Episode: Are We the Bad Examples?
Date: March 3, 2026
Hosts: Becky Hayter (with Jess and Tracy from "Bad Examples")
Runtime Covered: [00:12]–[66:17]

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Episode Overview

This episode of "Karma & Chaos" sees regular host Becky Hayter joined by Jess and Tracy of "Bad Examples" for a crossover of Jersey reality TV icons, honest conversations about love lives, and reality TV nostalgia. The trio deep-dive into their roots in New Jersey, discuss sexuality and dating, and dissect perceptions of their past TV personas. Throughout, they riff on friendship, identity, and the unique chaos of transitioning through different eras of adulthood. The tone is unfiltered, witty, and extremely candid—a true fly-on-the-wall episode for anyone fascinated by the intersection of pop culture, relationships, and personal growth.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Breaking the Ice and Introducing the Guests ([00:16]–[02:10])

• Becky jokes about "breaking up" with Kail and introducing her new co-hosts Jess and Tracy, known for their "Bad Examples" podcast.
• Early conversation centers around perceptions and labels, specifically “lipstick lesbians,” and playful banter about each other’s types and energies.

Memorable Quote:
Tracy: "Do two lipsticks go together?" ([02:45])

2. Friendship Dynamics and "Friend-Zoning" Stories ([02:21]–[06:28])

• Jess and Becky discuss how their interactions were interpreted as friendly or flirty, leading to humorous confusion over texts and "friend-zoning".
• Emphasis on how women communicate ambiguity and reassurance ("Don't worry, I love you too") can be misread.

Memorable Quote:
Jess: "Don't worry is such a soft way of being like..." ([05:15])

3. Meet the Hosts: Quick Personal Histories ([06:35]–[09:35])

• Jess and Tracy give “elevator pitch” bios: reality TV backgrounds, complicated love lives, parenting, and podcast origin stories.
• Tracy and Jess' tight friendship is traced to "Jerseylicious" (“the evil genius” and “the mean one”).

Notable Exchange:
Jess: "Now I’m questioning whether I’m a lesbian because I’m with you guys all the time." ([07:27])

4. Inside Reality TV: The Making of "Jerseylicious" ([09:35]–[20:17])

• The discussion shifts to behind-the-scenes tales from their reality TV days—fabricated drama, being cast as the "villain," and the mechanics of shooting reality television.
• They share iconic scenes, fame experiences (from South Park parody to partying with celebrities), and the difference between reality on screen versus real connections.

Highlights & Quotes:
Jess: "I literally started the reality villain thing. Like, me, Spencer Pratt, and, like, I don’t know who else." ([15:38])
Becky: "Did I want to rock? What year was this?" ([16:35])

5. Life Since Reality TV: Local Roots, Careers, and Family ([20:17]–[24:32])

• The women map out New Jersey geography using highway exits and recall overlapping regional cultures.
• Discussion includes family heritage, Greek roots (Becky), and Italian-Greek blend (Jess).

6. Social Media, Staples, and "Staples Baddie" TikTok ([27:24]–[29:09])

• A sidebar into Becky’s chair-shopping trip at Staples sparks a cultural sidebar about TikTok’s "Staples Baddie" and the impact of young creators on corporate brands.

7. Money, Royalties, and Life After the Limelight ([29:10]–[30:36])

• Frustration over lack of royalties from shows like "Jerseylicious" resurfaces.
• Reality TV cast members lacked residuals and were constrained by exclusive contracts.

8. Relationships and "Teen Mom" Connections ([32:19]–[35:04])

• Kale’s cameo lore addressed: people assumed Becky and Kail dated, but they clarify it’s just friendship with playful feeding-into the rumors.
• Becky’s sexuality and “type” is discussed openly.

Memorable Exchange:
Jess: "Oh, I thought this whole time you guys were like exes." ([33:02])
Becky: "There's like tabloids on tabloids on tabloids around, like, if we're dating or not." ([33:38])

9. Lesbian Stereotypes, Dating, and Gender Roles ([35:04]–[41:45])

• Insight into the dynamics of attraction: the thrill of the chase, why straight women often want the attention of queer women, and how dating women can feel like a “challenge.”
• Candid discussion of fluid sexuality and queer representation in friendship dynamics.
• Becky & Jess riff on gay/straight “types” and dating outside your norm.

Notable Moment:
Becky: "My type is, like, straight. Pretty much." ([34:58])
Tracy: "Men are the forefronters of disappointment." ([36:51])

10. Dating Lives and Gendered Expectations ([43:05]–[46:03])

• Jess discusses her recent stretch of celibacy and how "disgusted" she’s become by men after several disappointing relationships.
• They explore curiosity about dating women, and the stereotypes and fears about making the switch.

Notable Quote:
Jess: "So I am struggling mentally... five months, celibate, not doing well, in case you wanted to know." ([43:43])

11. Lesbians, Labels, and TikTok Culture ([46:47]–[54:27])

• Explanation of terms: stud, butch, femme, chapstick lesbians (neutral presentation).
• Becky shares her own identity as “pretty neutral” but notes feminine attributes and leadership energy.
• TikTok lesbian culture is broken down—"hey mamas," cringey thirst traps, and how social media amplifies certain queer tropes.

12. Real Talk: Why Women Fall for Women ([59:46]–[62:24])

• Becky gives insight into why many women develop deep emotional bonds with other women and how this can slide into romantic attraction with the right variables.
• "U-Hauling" culture and why queer relationships can seem to move faster, and how coming out later can "delay" emotional maturity milestones.

Memorable Explanation:
Becky: "It’s really easy when you think about your best friends... you love them with your whole heart, right? So you’re already capable of being in love with a female." ([61:04])

13. Relationships, Therapy, and Self-Awareness ([56:08]–[57:00])

• Scorpios unite: self-awareness vs therapy.
• Confessionals about their tendencies as serial monogamists or lily-padders.

Quote:
Becky: "I’m hyper aware of exactly who I am and my problems in life. And I still go to therapy." ([56:39])

14. Love Stories, Sexuality, and Personal Growth ([57:15]–[59:39])

• Tracy shares her “love story”—high school connection, infamous BJ, and the journey to marriage.
• Becky opens up about not realizing she was gay until age 19, her experience falling for women, and how that shaped her life.

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• “Do two lipsticks go together?” — Tracy ([02:45])
• “Don’t worry is such a soft way of being like…” — Jess ([05:15])
• “Now I’m questioning whether I’m a lesbian because I’m with you guys all the time.” — Jess ([07:27])
• "I literally started the reality villain thing. Like, me, Spencer Pratt, and, like, I don't know who else." — Jess ([15:38])
• "Men are the forefronters of disappointment." — Tracy ([36:51])
• “So I am struggling mentally... five months, celibate, not doing well, in case you wanted to know.” — Jess ([43:43])
• “I just want to be, like, just a girl. I want to turn my brain off and, like, I want to do nothing ever.” — Jess ([53:35])
• “I’m hyper aware of exactly who I am and my problems in life. And I still go to therapy.” — Becky ([56:39])
• "It’s really easy when you think about your best friends... you love them with your whole heart, right? So you’re already capable of being in love with a female." — Becky ([61:04])

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Fun & Memorable Moments

• The group’s confusion and laughter over the “Staples baddie” TikTok phenomenon ([28:05])
• Running Jersey geography by exit numbers and stereotypes ([21:46], [26:39])
• Serialization of Tracy’s “villain” era on Jerseylicious, including the notorious Sonic parking lot vignette ([15:06])
• The recurring suggestion (soon, nearly earnest) of setting Jess up on a girl-date to break her dating rut ([54:23])

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Episode Structure & Flow

• [00:12]–[06:28]: Ice Breaking, Pod Swap Energy, Definitions, and Friendship Flirtation
• [06:28]–[20:17]: Bios, Reality TV Nostalgia, Behind-the-Scenes Drama
• [20:17]–[32:19]: Family, Geography, and Social Media Stereotypes
• [32:19]–[41:45]: Relationships, Pop Culture, Teen Mom Myths, Lore Clarified
• [41:45]–[56:46]: Dating Disasters, Sexuality, Gender Roles, Therapy
• [56:46]–[66:17]: Candid Love and Relationship Talk, Labels, and New Momlife Plans

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Where to Find the Guests

• Jess and Tracy: Bad Examples Podcast on Instagram / @JessHottie, @TracyDeMarco
• Becky: @beckyhayter
• Kail Lowry (mentioned): Regular host, absent for this episode

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Closing Message

This episode exemplifies the essence of "Karma & Chaos": living honestly and loudly, dissecting life’s hilarious twists, and making space for the messy in-between. Whether you’re a Jersey native, an ex-reality star, or just navigating your own thirties chaos, Becky, Jess, and Tracy make you feel right at home—no matter which exit you call your own.

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Next Episode Tease:

• Next episode features a foot fetish discussion, “the other woman,” and more "cheating" stories on "Bad Examples."
• Becky hints at joining "Bad Examples" for a motherhood episode soon.

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For fans looking for real talk, nostalgia, and a bit of dating chaos, this crossover hits every mark—delivering relatability, laughter, and insight at every juicy timestamp.

Transcript

[Jess]

Jess, you're looking extra done up today. You have, like, a hot date or something?

[Becky]

Anyways, welcome back, everyone, to karma and chaos. Kale and I have officially broke up, and I have welcomed two new co hosts in into the world. So everyone please give Jess and Tracy a round of applause. Good morning, good evening, good day, good night. Whenever you're listening to this, we're happy to have you. Well, where to even begin? Do we address elephants now? Do we address elephants?

[Jess]

I think we need to start off strong. Yeah. Elephants should be walked at this point,

[Becky]

so rally them up. It's so interesting because we haven't talked about this yet. If you guys don't know, Justin, Tracy have a podcast called Bad Examples. They are on the killer network. They are both Jersey girls as well, which I feel like we'll have to get into the draft. Like, the extreme difference of, like, who you are as a person based on where you grew up in Jersey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is system. I heard that I was being talked about on your podcast, Jess. Care to share?

[Jess]

Don't they start, Jessica?

[Becky]

Yeah, so we give some context behind it. How does this conversation even start talking

[Jess]

about

[Tracy]

our types of Tracy, if we were so.

[Jess]

I always say I wish I was a lesbian, because I feel like lesbian relationships are so much more successful. Men suck. I hate that I'm attracted to men. I hate it. And then we were like, if I were to cross over, my type would be. And I went in my type and. Jess, this is your type. My type is, like, total lipstick. Like, if I'm going girl, she has to be, like, epitome of, like, feminine standards.

[Tracy]

Like, which I don't understand for her. It makes no sense for me, like, right. I. I feel like Tracy is already that person.

[Jess]

Yeah. I feel like I switch moments.

[Tracy]

Wait, can you clarify what lipstick means exactly?

[Becky]

Like, a lesbian that wears lipstick.

[Jess]

Like, someone just somebody who wears lipstick. Or, like, super, super feminine.

[Becky]

No, like, lipstick is, like, the, like, femme presenting. Like. Okay. Probably wouldn't know they were gay just by looking at them.

[Jess]

That would be me, right?

[Becky]

Oh, for sure. Okay, well, yeah.

[Tracy]

Do two lipsticks go together?

[Becky]

Yeah, they can. Anyone can go together. Jess.

[Jess]

Jess, there's not rules. Like, I can't. She's so nervous. She's twitching right now. Because this is why. Because Jessica's tight is Becky and only Becky. Not a variation of Becky, the human Becky.

[Becky]

Like, every. Like, any characteristic that's thrown.

[Jess]

Don't trust you. It doesn't matter. It's not like Becky. If he had blonde hair. It's Not Becky. If she was an inch taller. It's Becky head to toe. Jesus Christ.

[Becky]

Yes. What. What made you come to this realization?

[Jess]

Pride. When we wrapped Fried, she was like,

[Becky]

yup, we did spend. We did spend pride together. But it was funny. So Alessandra sent me the clip, and she was like, you know, they were talking about you, and I was, like, talking about me. Why were they talking about me? And it was flattering to say the least. But, Jess, have you ever hooked up with a girl?

[Tracy]

No. I mean, besides, like, trying to get a guy's attention in college, you know,

[Becky]

and just making out. Yeah. No. You're entering some, like, rough waters there.

[Jess]

Dangerous territories, Jessica.

[Becky]

Literally dangerous territories. We'll get back into this conversation, but I do want to wait.

[Tracy]

I also want to say that Becky already friend zoned me, though.

[Jess]

Oh, yeah. Just kind of flirted with her and text, and Becky ended it, so shut it down so fast.

[Becky]

Wait, I need to pull up these texts because. So funny.

[Jess]

Jess has never been friend zoned so quickly.

[Becky]

Your ability to take that and make it feel. Let me just put this out there of what the text thread said, because it has, like, there's no friend zone and friend zone behind this. It said. I almost said Ariana. Alessandra said, Jess loves Becky. Haha. And I said, can't wait to talk about it. Wait, who. Who said l. My fo, probably. And then said, but, Jess, funny how

[Jess]

you don't have me saved in your phone.

[Becky]

No, no, it's saved in my phone. It's not on my computer. They don't. They don't sync. Okay, but it's. I said, but, Jess, I love you too. Don't worry. How is that friend?

[Jess]

Don't worry is such a soft way of being. Like.

[Tracy]

And the butt.

[Jess]

You guys have no personal out.

[Becky]

I feel like that was flirty that.

[Jess]

You're gonna have to turn it up. We are Scorpios, ma'. Am. You need to turn up the heat.

[Becky]

No. You guys have no perception of how females talk, right?

[Jess]

Like, because we're attracted to men. This is the problem here. This is what we're talking about. We need to.

[Tracy]

If a man said that to me,

[Jess]

it'd be a rap. Like, I'd be like, oh, I'm just saying, don't worry. It's like, relax. Like, calm down.

[Tracy]

A man saying, don't worry. I'm so worried. Like, then we're worried.

[Becky]

Like, don't worry. Like, the love is mutual, you know? Wait, Jess, can you move over, like, a foot? You're happy yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Your face is like, I can't see it, and I want to be able to see it.

[Tracy]

Oh, let me bring my.

[Jess]

There you go. This type of. She loves that type of. Perfect. Much better.

[Becky]

That's so weird that you took that as a friend zone thing, but I

[Jess]

also did, too, for her. So when she said it to me, I was like, oh, yeah, I saw that.

[Becky]

Are you guys mentally unstable?

[Jess]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Jess]

Interesting you should say that.

[Becky]

Yes. Can we get a little bit of, like, I know nothing about either of you. Right? Like, can we.

[Jess]

And I'm sure about you and Kale. We're like, we have to, like, Google things, like, if we have questions. We don't really know anything about you guys. We talk about this all the time.

[Tracy]

I said to Tracy, I'm like, can

[Becky]

you give me, like, a elevator pitch on yourself? So that's. Get some details.

[Tracy]

You want me. Want me to talk about me, or you want me to talk about Tracy?

[Becky]

No, you talk about you talk about you.

[Tracy]

Okay.

[Jess]

Elevator. That means you have, like, 15 seconds, Jess.

[Tracy]

Well, so I am the evil genius behind the podcast, right? So my. I. I come up with the content, and I sneak attack Tracy all day. This is my art show.

[Becky]

I want to know where you grew up.

[Jess]

What?

[Becky]

Who was your first boyfriend?

[Tracy]

Where?

[Jess]

Like, you want me to see how this works?

[Tracy]

Yeah.

[Jess]

Okay. Okay. So I was on a reality TV show. I had a ton of boyfriends. Then I got married. Wrong guy had three beautiful kids. Great decision. Married, don't sign paperwork for the government moving forward. I got divorced, went crazy in 2020. Had a lot of fucking guys on rotation because I was, like, getting back out there. No problem. Guy after guy had three boyfriends in 2025. Horrible decisions. Now I'm questioning whether I'm a lesbian because I'm with you guys all the time. And now that's why we're in this situation.

[Becky]

You're single.

[Tracy]

That was incredible.

[Jess]

Yeah? Yeah.

[Becky]

Okay. You know anybody? No.

[Jess]

She.

[Becky]

You? She scares me, so. Yeah.

[Jess]

Why do I scare you? Jess doesn't scare you. We're the same.

[Becky]

No, y' all aren't the same.

[Jess]

What's different?

[Becky]

There's, like, you guys are, like, vastly different.

[Jess]

I feel like me and Jess are like two peas and pods.

[Becky]

No.

[Tracy]

I'm also scared of Tracy, so that makes sense.

[Jess]

What the fuck? I am the nice Jess is the mean one of the two of us, by the way. So nice.

[Becky]

Maybe it's just because Jess is always nice to me.

[Jess]

Wait, am I come. Do I come off like this to Everyone. Alessandra, are you also scared of me?

[Becky]

She. I don't even think she's here.

[Jess]

She left.

[Tracy]

She left 20 minutes ago.

[Jess]

I thought she was monitoring, like, quietly somewhere.

[Becky]

No, she has better things to do. All right, Jess.

[Jess]

Why am I scary?

[Becky]

Give me the 411 of you.

[Tracy]

Okay. Mine's a little more boring. I mean, I'm married. I have two kids, two little girls. And. Yeah, I don't know. I. I was on reality tv, too. I met Tracy on Jerseylicious. I was extra, thank you very much, but I'm now a star. But day one, me and Tracy, we were sitting in that chair with the cameras on us. And Tracy, I'll never forget, you know, they were telling us to freeze, freeze. And I'm like, what kind of reality bullshit this was like, season one, episode one. I'm like, why are they having us freeze, like, in the middle of the scene? It was just so stupid. And Tracy and I were just so annoyed. Like, we just want to get shit done, right? Try it.

[Becky]

It's just.

[Jess]

Yeah, you're.

[Tracy]

We're waiting for. For 45 minutes for, like, the dumbest setup. And instantly, Tracy and I just bonded over that.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Jess]

I told them they have to bring her back. She has to be like. The second I met her, I was like, we're going to bring this girl back. And they were like, do you have any idea for extras? I was like, I want that girl back. From the first episode.

[Becky]

What was. I've never watched Jerseylicious. It's so embarrassing.

[Jess]

It's about me and this one girl who don't get along. And then the whole salon kind of revolves around me and her not getting along for six seasons. And it's all so fabricated. Like, at the end of the day, I ended up not. I really not didn't like her at the end of the day because of, like, how it all played out. But, like, I didn't have a. I didn't even know who she was when we first met. And we were supposed to hate each other. You did. We all understood the assignment. I had no idea who she was. She didn't know who I was. Like, we did not know each other. We're like, you guys are gonna fight. And we were like, cool. And that was it. And then it built from there.

[Tracy]

I thought they cast her because you didn't like her. That's.

[Jess]

No. They cast her first. She was first cast with Jackie, and then Jackie was like, you have to call Tracy. She would make a good villain. And then they put me on the phone with Spencer Pratt. And Pratt was like, oh, you gotta do this. It's so great, so fun, blah, blah. And I was like, okay, I could play a villain. And then they pitched it for us. I did the whole first season, I thought it was a scripted show because you saw how scripted it was, Jess. And then season two, the billboards went up in New York City and it was like, really reality show. And I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on.

[Tracy]

They called it.

[Jess]

They called it.

[Tracy]

It was a docu.

[Jess]

Soap opera language. They used documentary soap opera. A soap opera is scripted. They kept being like, don't you love Sunny from General Hospital? He's the villain. I'm like, I do love Sunny. I could play this villain. I mean, I honestly Oscar worthy.

[Becky]

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[Becky]

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[Becky]

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[Jess]

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[Becky]

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[Jess]

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[Becky]

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[Jess]

Daily Double meal deal.

[Becky]

Each with its own small fries, drink and Four Piece McNuggets.

[Jess]

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[Tracy]

Tracy's the original, like one of the original reality TV villains. I don't know.

[Jess]

By the way, didn't know that was happening.

[Becky]

I am so taken aback right now because I just, I've. I've never heard, like really even heard of Jersey Lizards. The only reason I know it is because from meeting you and then like just knowing of it, I've never googled it. I've never. Becky.

[Tracy]

There is a famous scene. It's like pop culture part of like pop culture history. Tracy is in a Sonic parking lot with the girl that is her enemy. Now, at this point in the season,

[Jess]

we don't like each other.

[Tracy]

For real, for real don't like each other. And they get into a fight and Tracy spits on her in the Sonic parking lot. And they start going at it, you

[Jess]

know, with their pranks and breaks it up.

[Tracy]

And a guy on the Sonic roller

[Becky]

skates roller skates over and breaks it up.

[Tracy]

I mean, it is, it is an iconic moment of pop culture history. It's been, you know, I think Redone everywhere. It was on every show. They made Tracy a South park character. It was just a huge thing. Yeah.

[Jess]

So it's so funny because my kids act like I'm such a fucking weirdo. They're like, oh, my mom, like thinks she's cool. I'm like, no, stop, stop. I am cool. I literally like started the reality villain thing. Like me, Spencer Brat, and like, I don't know who else.

[Becky]

Like, I'm just looking at pictures of you.

[Tracy]

Oh, God.

[Becky]

And I am like, don't do that. So we're wildly like blown away. Guys, if you're listening, do you. Have you seen Jerseylicious? Like, do you.

[Jess]

Like, it was everywhere. They were flying us out to London. They wanted to fly us out to Australia. We were going to la. We were at premiere parties with the Jenners and the Kardashians and Nick Cannon and like Ozzy Osbourne and all his family. Like, we were with all these people constantly. Like we were doing PR constantly with them.

[Becky]

Did I want to rock? What year was this?

[Jess]

And you're from Jersey.

[Becky]

I know. What year did this come out?

[Jess]

2010 to 2013. It ended the year I got married.

[Becky]

You know, that makes sense that I wouldn't watch it because I was. That was like my prime time college and like I was just partying.

[Jess]

And it was also coincide when Jersey Shore came out.

[Becky]

We.

[Jess]

Our first episode came out, I think one week before or after theirs were because we were all in the. They used to keep us in like a hotel like situation. But it was where we lived. It was all fake. We all lived in the same place, but they pretended we all lived in different places. And then we'd all go to each other's apartments to go watch Jersey Shore because we were like, oh, is this show like our show? And then once we saw it, we like kind of fell off of that. We were like, oh, I don't know. Like that's not really what we thought it was. So like I've never watched it after like the first two episodes of the first season.

[Becky]

Do you see my state of shock right now?

[Jess]

Yeah, no, it's. It's. It's like a fever dream that neither of us remember like really doing. And it was weird because like we'd be filming a scene at 2 in the morning because that's when we were allowed to be in the salon because they had real life clients and people who actually worked there. And then I'd be like, guys, I'm so tired. I need to be done with this scene. They're like, no, just do it once or twice more. It was like a scene where you had to do it over and over. You had to wear the clothes from yesterday, make sure your hair looked exactly the same from yesterday. It was all fake. And then they'd be like, tracy's tired. Can we get a Dunkin run? And then they'd run around the salon and get Dunkin orders from everyone. And then a pa, a producer's assistant would go run out and go caffeine us all up or, like, alcohol us all up, whatever they needed to do to keep us around. And then they'd lock us and step like a dick.

[Becky]

Like, we're like, if I. If I talk to, like, a PA that, like, worked with you back then, would they be like, I was.

[Jess]

I knew them, their family, their backstory, all their names. Personally, I still follow them on social media. Like, as.

[Tracy]

As you saw today, Tracy is always on time. Right?

[Becky]

So always.

[Tracy]

The worst thing you can do in this reality TV universe is when your call time is 2 o'.

[Becky]

Clock.

[Tracy]

If you show at your time, 2 hours late is so fudgeing, rude and disrespectful to the crew.

[Jess]

Right. In private rooms at this point, they lock us in small rooms.

[Tracy]

And a lot of the cast is known for being late to set. And that makes.

[Jess]

When you say a lot, you mean Olivia?

[Becky]

No, just a lot.

[Jess]

We used to wait. Oh, Alexa was always late also. Yeah, okay. But they used to lock us in rooms. And then the call time would be. Call time 10 o' clock in the morning, hair and makeup ready. And Olivia would show up at 4, 5, 6. And we'd be sitting there. So by season three, I would say I started telling them, you guys can come show for me to pick me up. I will be showing up on camera ready. Because by the time I get there, get camera ready in studio, and then she shows up three hours later. I still will be ready before she even gets there. So I. We all accommodated to, like, how it was run behind the scenes, but it was always around.

[Tracy]

My point of that is that Tracy always respected that. She was never late. She never. And I think that, like, the.

[Jess]

What time did I show up today, Becky? Five minutes early, waiting 10 minutes.

[Becky]

You did show up five minutes early.

[Tracy]

Annoying when it comes to that, but just time.

[Becky]

You guys have had quite the glow up since 2010.

[Jess]

Thank you. Well, also, makeup was very different then. You kind of just like, put it all over your face and then put concealer on your lips.

[Tracy]

Can you stop googling what you're Doing.

[Jess]

Yeah, we're going to need you to stop what you're doing.

[Becky]

Rolling, please.

[Jess]

You know, and then also the clothes were like the big bangles that matched. Your skirt that matched. It was like, all very obnoxious. My space era were.

[Becky]

Did you work in a hair salon on screen?

[Jess]

Yes. I've never once been paid from Gatsby Salon, Anthony Roberts Salon. She's never been paid by Glam Ferry. Right. Maybe like, side jobs. Yeah, but not on the show. Correct. None of us have ever really worked for any of these places. We worked for End Mall USA and Alex Duda and Jerseylicious Incorporated, but we've never worked at those salons ever.

[Becky]

Are you guys licensed? Like. Yes. Cosmetologists?

[Jess]

Yes. But it's so funny because I went to beauty school and then I was like, oh, my God, I got a. I got a job at this great salon on tv. And then I quickly realized, no, the. I didn't. I got a job on Jerseylicious, which was not being a hairdresser because we never actually did hair so many times. You'll go back and watch me just brushing the hair because you couldn't, for continuity, curl a piece. And then if we had to go back and seen that piece, can't be curled.

[Becky]

So do you. Okay. I have so many questions. Do you guys. Are you guys active cosmetologists now?

[Tracy]

Yes.

[Becky]

You do hair now?

[Tracy]

I do makeup.

[Becky]

You do makeup now.

[Jess]

Jess is a makeup artist. I don't have a license for makeup, but you don't really. I don't think you wanted a license for makeup, right? Yeah, no. But, yeah, we have it for hair.

[Becky]

Okay. So where in Jersey are you guys? I'm north. Super north.

[Jess]

You grew up at what exit, Jess? Because exits are how Jersey people figure out where you're from.

[Becky]

Tracy, let's not all bunch Jersey people together because we're all very different. I do not go by where exits are.

[Jess]

Oh, no. We most majority of Jersey people, if they're like, oh, where are you from? And they're like, oh, exit 113. They're like, oh, you live off the parkway?

[Becky]

Yeah. You go off of that, the exit,

[Jess]

there's Turnpike and Parkway. You could pick two massive highways that go up and down the whole state.

[Becky]

Neither near me.

[Jess]

Oh, because you're basically Pennsylvania then.

[Becky]

Okay.

[Jess]

We don't consider you Jersey.

[Becky]

Where are you from?

[Tracy]

I'm North Jersey. Like 165 Paramus Hackensack.

[Becky]

Do you know that area?

[Jess]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Jess]

Okay.

[Becky]

Yeah, yeah. So my grandfather used to live in Hagensack Fun fact. I grew up Greek Orthodox, so I grew up in the Greek Orthodox Church, which is, like, crazy. In New Jersey, they have, like, Junior Olympics. You would do Goya and do, like, all these sporting events against other churches in New Jersey. And there's one in Paramus. That's why I know where that is.

[Tracy]

Oh, you're Greek.

[Becky]

Yeah, I'm Greek.

[Jess]

Nice.

[Becky]

Wow.

[Jess]

She loves you even more. That's like, the worst thing you could have just said. She's like, hold on. She's Mediterranean. Okay.

[Becky]

Where do you think this olive skin comes from? Way before summer.

[Tracy]

Truly.

[Jess]

I honestly didn't know. I would have never guessed what you were.

[Tracy]

I see it now that you say it, though.

[Jess]

Yeah, now that you say it. I'm hyper aware of it. But, like, before, I was like, I have no idea. I never even.

[Tracy]

Now you say it, I'm like, of course she is.

[Becky]

My. My Yaya and Papu were both from, like, the Greek islands, like, from Samus and cre.

[Jess]

So all my Italian family married Greek, So all my cousins. Every cousin, basically, I have is Italian and Greek.

[Becky]

Okay. But I'm not Mediterranean. Where are you from?

[Tracy]

To the motherland.

[Becky]

Have I been back? Hell, yeah. Yeah.

[Tracy]

That's awesome.

[Becky]

Yeah. This one time. This one time I went there in. It was, like, 2011, I think it was actually. I think that was my first time there. And my papu was still alive, and I asked him if we still had family, like, living there, and he was so excited. He reached out to his cousins. His cousins came and picked me up from the airport. They, like, gave me all these gifts. They were so excited because they grew up with my papu and they had never met anyone from his family. So I, like, met my cousins, met, like, a bunch of people. It was really cool.

[Tracy]

Oh, that's nice.

[Becky]

And then I've gone on a cruise around the Greek islands.

[Jess]

Wow.

[Becky]

I really love Jersey much. So I. I lived in. In Barcelona for four months, so I traveled a lot, like, while I was over there.

[Jess]

Cultured.

[Becky]

Cultured, for sure.

[Tracy]

We love a cultured. Yes, yes, yes.

[Becky]

These days, I'm all about quality over quantity, Especially in my closet. If it's not well made or versatile, it's just not worth it for me. That's honestly why I love quints. The fabrics feel elevated, the cuts are thoughtful, and the pricing actually makes sense. I used to buy trendy pieces that looked cute for one season, and then that was. Just. Didn't hold up. But now I'd rather have staples I can rewear constantly quite quince. Makes high quality wardrobe staples using premium fabrics like 100 European linen, 100 silk, or organic cotton poplin. Their lightweight cotton cashmere sweaters are perfect for this. In between weather and the seasonal spring colors are so, so good that quince cotton cashmere sweater has become my go to. It's light enough for layering, but still feels luxurious. And it didn't cost what I thought quality cashmere would. And their linen, it actually holds its shape and doesn't wrinkle like every other linen I have owned. They work directly with safe, ethical factories and cut out the middleman so you're not paying for crazy retail markups. And it shows. These pieces are consistently rated 4.5 out of 5 stars because real people are wearing them every day and loving them. So stop waiting to build your wardrobe you actually want right now. Go to quince.com Karma for free shipping and 365 day returns. That's a full year to wear it and love it. And you will now available in Canada too. Don't keep settling for clothes that don't last. Go to Q U I n c e.com karma for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com karma. All right, I'm not gonna ask again. Tracy, where are you from in Jersey?

[Jess]

Oh, I'm from Exit 145 for people who do that. Otherwise, East Hanover. Like, kind of at, like, Short Hills Mall.

[Becky]

Okay.

[Jess]

That's like my big landmine. The Landmine landmark. Sorry, that's there.

[Becky]

I don't often frequent Short Hills Mall.

[Jess]

Expensive.

[Becky]

Yeah, I'm not like, someone that.

[Jess]

Yeah, you don't come off as, you know, a I must get to Versace today type of girl.

[Becky]

Yeah, for sure. Like, I spend money on electronics. That's like my guilty pleasure. Or, like, big projects, like, or like 250 gamer chairs. Should I get a new chair? Like, did you say yesterday you went

[Tracy]

to Staples to try it out?

[Becky]

Yeah, I went to Staples because they have, like, all the chairs.

[Tracy]

Were you and I not just talking about how Staples.

[Jess]

Who we were? Like, who the Staples?

[Tracy]

I said, are they like an undercover? Like, they're like a front for, like,

[Becky]

laundering for two people that are chronically online and you guys don't know who the Staples baddie is?

[Jess]

Literally, like, hey, does Amazon own Staples? Because why are Amazon returns free at Staples?

[Becky]

Do you guys not know who the Staples baddie is? No.

[Tracy]

Is it.

[Becky]

Oh, my gosh.

[Jess]

Is this a trick question?

[Becky]

No. There's this girl on Tik Tok, then they call her the Staples baddie. And she works at Staples. So you know how typically corporations, if, like, you're working there, they don't want you to produce content while in their space. Like, Starbucks banned, like, people, like their employees from making content. All this thing. Well, there's this girl, like the Staples baddie, and she, like, does TikToks on things that Staple does, Like, like custom mugs and, like, does all this stuff. And people are like, I didn't even know Staples did that. And there's like a huge boom of Staples because of it.

[Tracy]

Because of it.

[Becky]

Yes.

[Jess]

You know what baddies out here changing the world? This is what we promote on our show.

[Becky]

And like, and Staples as a company has, like, fully endorsed it. Like, has, like, supported, like, her doing it.

[Jess]

That makes sense because me and Jess, two people who have been to Staples once in our life, had no idea why Staples still existed other than the amount of gamer chairs that they offer.

[Tracy]

Literally just talking about this and then you're like, yeah, I tried on a couple of gamer chairs at Staples.

[Jess]

They're not me. I just pictured you, like, walking around being like, yeah. Were you alone? Yeah.

[Tracy]

Did you do this by yourself?

[Becky]

I did it with my son. Okay, all right.

[Tracy]

That makes it a little better because you could pretend like it's for him or something, you know?

[Becky]

I needed an office chair. Yeah, I sit in. I'm a corporate girly. I sit in this chair from 9am to 7pm every day.

[Tracy]

How much does a chair like that cost anyway?

[Becky]

This was $250.

[Jess]

That's $100 less than the lowest Louboutin.

[Becky]

The. The one that I wanted was like 400. I couldn't justify spending that much money on a. A chair. You guys buy me a goddamn chair.

[Jess]

We don't have money to buy you a chair. I think maybe you don't get.

[Becky]

You don't get royalty or whatever it's called from Jersey.

[Jess]

No, no. This is why I hate Jerseylicious now. Because I'm like, I'm not seeing a dollar from them. Why do I want them on Hulu? I don't. I'm not seeing anything.

[Becky]

Oh, it's on Hulu.

[Jess]

It's repeating now.

[Becky]

Yeah, you don't get any money from it.

[Jess]

And we, when the show ended, were chased by other reality shows asking us to be on theirs or create a new one. And we had like a clause that said for five years we weren't allowed to do any other reality unless it was with the producers from Jerseylicious. Like, we were trapped.

[Becky]

Okay, so let me look up real Quick.

[Tracy]

I think no more looking up.

[Becky]

Not. Don't worry. That.

[Tracy]

Let me look you up.

[Becky]

You'll just see a lot of Teen Mom.

[Jess]

Yeah, speaking of that, I have no idea.

[Tracy]

I couldn't tell you your last name. It's just Becky.

[Jess]

It's Hater for the haters.

[Tracy]

That's not a real name.

[Jess]

Sure is.

[Tracy]

Shut. Your real last name's Hater.

[Jess]

Becky Hater.

[Tracy]

That's incredible.

[Jess]

Now. Now we have to get married.

[Becky]

You want to take my name?

[Jess]

Imagine if your hashtag name ever.

[Becky]

Your.

[Jess]

Your hashtag at your wedding is from At Jess Hottie to At Jess Hater.

[Becky]

Hater.

[Tracy]

Hottie. Yeah.

[Jess]

Would you liken it to Hater Hottie. Hater?

[Becky]

Yeah. Yeah. Just saying your last name isn't Hottie.

[Tracy]

No, you're right, Justin.

[Jess]

Stuck in 2010 where we called us selves. Things like that.

[Becky]

Interesting. Not great. You guys aren't too far from where I live.

[Jess]

Where are you?

[Becky]

Did you map crisis? Well, it's like, relative, right? Like, not far from me is pretty far.

[Jess]

Like an hour.

[Becky]

Yeah. Like, I think in Jersey, I live about an hour. I live at the end of 80, at the end of Route 80.

[Jess]

Oh, so you're west. Are you? By, like, what's the place with an S out there? That may be north. Are you south?

[Becky]

No, I'm directly west. Like, straight line from New York City.

[Tracy]

Wait, so you were on Teen Mom?

[Jess]

Like, Lake Hopacon?

[Becky]

Yeah. So, like, if, like, you go. Keep going past Lake Hopatcong.

[Jess]

Oh, okay.

[Becky]

Yeah. Was I on Teen Mom? Yeah, I was on it, like, a bunch.

[Jess]

You know, we've never seen any Teen mom ever. I've never watched one episode of Teen Mom. I have no idea.

[Becky]

I also have not. What? Like, I don't actively. Like, I didn't watch the show prior.

[Jess]

Yeah.

[Becky]

But then I met Kale through an ex of mine back in, like, 2011 or 2012. And then we became friends since then.

[Jess]

And then I was just, like, so not an ex of Kale?

[Becky]

What was that?

[Jess]

Are you also not an ex of Kale?

[Becky]

Oh, no, no, no, no.

[Jess]

Oh, I thought this whole time you guys were, like, exes.

[Tracy]

You never dated?

[Jess]

I thought you guys, like, dated or hooked up or something. That's the whole time. That's what I thought. I'm not even kidding. This whole time.

[Becky]

I wish she was here. This is so good.

[Jess]

I really did. I thought that you guys were like, are you guys.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

No, no.

[Jess]

I have no interior. Like, the whole assumption.

[Becky]

Yeah. The whole lore around us is, like, people think that we've dated or.

[Jess]

Okay, so I'm not the first.

[Becky]

No, not at all. Okay.

[Jess]

I feel better.

[Becky]

Like, there's, like, tabloids on tabloids on tabloids around, like, if we're dating or not. Okay. Yeah, we would, like, feed in. We would, like, feed into it. But I mean, like, I. I've always had a girlfriend, and, like, I'm not. Like, I've never. How do I explain it? I. We did, like, a really good job at making people think that we, like, have hooked up or, like, dated.

[Tracy]

You never.

[Jess]

Yeah, no, I thought so. And I again, never watched Teen mom and don't know anything about you guys. Just from, like, your energy on the show. I thought you guys have, like, low key hooked up and.

[Becky]

Yeah. So I was even a part of. So Kayl and Javi went to marriage boot camp camp. And in the marriage boot camp, like, room, there was pictures of me and her, like, and they made it, like, seem like I was the reason they got divorced and I went to marriage boot camp in the scene where they, like, pretend to get married again. And then so they say, like, does anyone here object? And I stood up and I objected.

[Tracy]

Are you kidding me?

[Becky]

This is amazing. Yeah. So wait.

[Jess]

That's genius.

[Becky]

It was good. It was fun. Yeah. No, Kale's really not my type, so.

[Jess]

Oh, yeah? What is your type?

[Becky]

My type is, like, straight. Pretty much.

[Jess]

Yeah. I feel like a lot of lesbians like straight girls because it's, like, a challenge to turn them.

[Becky]

Yeah. And, like. Yeah, so that's. Yeah, that's always. That's always been my mo. The issue is, is that here. Here lies. Here lies. The issue

[Tracy]

is.

[Becky]

It's the. It's the thrill of the chase. Right.

[Jess]

Like, once you chase and win, I

[Becky]

have to like someone. Right. And so, like, even with Kayla, it was always. In our earlier, like, years of relationships. It was. She was. She would always ask, like, why don't you hit on me? Like, why aren't you? And I'm like, Like, because I just. I. Like, I know that it would work. Right? Like,

[Tracy]

you know why as straight women, we are so obsessed with, like. Like, Kale is saying, like, why. Why are you not into me? Like, why are you not. Like, we. We need that gratification.

[Jess]

It's so, you know.

[Becky]

Yeah. It's not a lot of needs haven't been met your entire life.

[Jess]

Wow. That one felt like a direct hit.

[Becky]

That's it.

[Tracy]

That's it.

[Becky]

Did you just ring a bell?

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Yeah.

[Tracy]

You won.

[Jess]

We have a bell that we ring when someone's right you win.

[Becky]

What's the. Oh, that's a game.

[Tracy]

Yeah, that's the game. You won the game.

[Jess]

Life.

[Becky]

You're right. You're 100, right? Yeah. Women do a really good job at making you feel, like, listened to and just, like, seen.

[Jess]

Right.

[Becky]

And like, that's a basic. That. That should be a basic human requirement.

[Tracy]

I think.

[Jess]

I think more than that, men do a really good job at not making you feel seen, which in turn makes us look for somebody who does make us feel seen for sure.

[Becky]

Then that validates.

[Jess]

So, like, men are really the forefronters of disappointment.

[Tracy]

Yeah, men are just like I seen.

[Jess]

They're just really out here doing the least. Doing the least.

[Becky]

You guys know I'm not someone who jumps on every single wellness trend. If anything, I'm skeptical. Like, is this actually doing something or are we just being influenced again? But I've been using Armor Colostrum for a while now, and I've genuinely noticed a difference, especially in my gut and overall feeling more balanced, less of that random bloating, more steady energy. And with everything we're exposed to, stress, processed food, blue light, all of it. I feel like my body needs backup. Armor Colostrum is nature's original superfood. It's packed with over 400 bioactive nutrients that work at the cellular level to fortify gut health, strengthen immune health, fuel performance, and more. And what I love is that it's not some overly processed food formula. It's pure, potent, natural, and clean. It's sustainably sourced with a commitment to calf first sourcing, which really matters. I just mix it in my water in the morning. It's four daily scoops, and that's it. It's simple, but it feels foundational. It feels like I'm actually supporting my body instead of chasing symptoms. We've worked out a special offer for our audience. Receive 30% off your first subscription order. Go to Armra.com chaos and enter chaos to get 30% off your first subscription order. Wait. I'm going to text Kale right now in the group chat and say, wait, I'm dead. Tracy, you left.

[Jess]

She died. Hold on, I'm here.

[Tracy]

She wanted to give us some time alone.

[Jess]

I. I certainly did.

[Becky]

Wait.

[Jess]

Oh, I don't know how to do any of that.

[Becky]

Swipe down.

[Jess]

I did it.

[Becky]

I did it.

[Jess]

I did it. But I didn't know how to do it before.

[Tracy]

Are you good at techie stuff?

[Becky]

Am I? Yeah.

[Jess]

Another turn on for Jess. Since we can't do.

[Becky]

You know, I've spent my entire life, my mom was really good at, like, you know, being a badass and just doing things herself. And so I have a really hard time. Wait, my. One of my poorest qualities is I'm really. What's the word?

[Jess]

Impatient. Yes.

[Becky]

Yep. I'm super impatient. So if I want something done, like, I need to get it done, and if I can't find someone to do it, I'll teach myself how to do it. And, like, this. I've, like, I, like, framed out this whole room. Like, and I taught myself how to frame and do renovation stuff to, like, so that I could get things done quicker. Yeah, but I know my Tracy.

[Tracy]

You want to be with a lipstick.

[Becky]

That's.

[Tracy]

This is the way.

[Jess]

No, I don't want to be with. This is why I'm not a lesbian, because I would be the butch. I don't want to be the man. I need to be taken care of. This is why I'm not. Exhibit A of why. Because I'm attracted to the feminine of women. Right. But I don't want to be with them.

[Becky]

Yeah, but you shouldn't discredit a lipstick just because, like, I assume.

[Jess]

I know. I feel like. I think. I instantly think that, like, if you're really pretty, you're not good at anything else. Like, you're, like, super into your looks. That's all you care about. Do you know what I mean? Like, like, oh, she cares about her hair and her makeup, so she doesn't know how to do anything else. That's instantly what I think, because that's how I am. I don't know how to do anything else.

[Becky]

No, you guys need to. We need to. We should do. When are you doing your dating show thing? I want to come.

[Jess]

Literally supposed to be last night, and they canceled it because of the SN and there was no snow. It was supposed to snow and it didn't. And so all these people cancelled in fear because we had a snowstorm, obviously that was pretty substantial. And then there was no snow because the meteorologists don't know what they're doing. And then it was cancelled. So it's. Right now it's got to be postponed.

[Becky]

But, like, okay, can I come to it?

[Jess]

Yeah, anybody can come.

[Becky]

Yeah, no, we want you to go.

[Jess]

That doesn't work. Side note, why don't we just have our own dating show with this show, within this show, and you guys set me up that way?

[Becky]

Hold on. The dating show is for you?

[Jess]

Yes.

[Becky]

Yeah. Was for you to find someone.

[Jess]

Yes. This is why we had issues with the. With the restaurant because people were not understanding what the event was. And they also, like, people that were in relationships were like, I want to come, but I can't because I'm married. And I'm like, this is not. You have to be single to go. This is. They put me on stage and put three guys on stage blindly, and I gotta pick them based on their question answers. But we should do that here.

[Becky]

That. You should let me host that.

[Jess]

Yes, we should host it on this show.

[Becky]

Yeah. Wait, I'm so fast. I thought it was like, you hosting a dating show where you're pulling, like, kind of random people from the audience. Because I've seen that on TikTok of that, like, happening.

[Tracy]

No, they were going to literally have

[Jess]

her literally going to put me on

[Tracy]

one side of the wall and then guys on the other, and she wouldn't see what they look like. It was going to be so good. So funny.

[Jess]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Did you have the men picked out?

[Jess]

They did. They had people submit men. And I did not know who they were, so I know still nobody. I don't know who was going to be there and who wasn't, because I don't. I didn't want to know that information. I wanted it to be authentic.

[Becky]

I just want to let you know, when I asked if I can come, I didn't like your enthusiasm about inviting.

[Jess]

I agree.

[Tracy]

She was like, yeah, anybody can come.

[Becky]

Yeah. I didn't like, oh, she's not anybody.

[Jess]

Sorry. Yeah, but you're married, so I thought you meant, like, can I come? Like, watch you make a fool of yourself. But you didn't understand what the concept of the show was.

[Becky]

I can't be married and come.

[Jess]

Nope. No, I just thought you meant you wanted to sit in the audience and watch me make a fool of myself. And I was like, sure. Anybody can watch me do that. Yeah, of course.

[Becky]

All right, we're backtracking here. Are you actively. Are you actively dating right now? Like, do you.

[Jess]

So I was actively dating as of October. I broke up with my boyfriend. No lies. He broke up with me because he said he couldn't handle being with somebody in the public eye, which, as for somebody who's 65 is such a move. But anyway, like, what are you scared of? Like, you're bigger than the normal human. Okay. So after that, I, like, became celibate, and I've been celibate since we broke up in October. October. And I know you don't know me like that, but I'm literally, like, borderline sex addict. Like, I am not the girl Turning down my boyfriend ever. So I am struggling mentally with. October is October, November, December, January, February, almost March. Five months, celibate, not doing well. In case you wanted to know.

[Becky]

Is this like a emotional and spiritual journey you're going on or is it.

[Jess]

No, this is like, men are disgusting to me at this point. Even like the men who, like, want it. Like, let me take you out, blah, blah. I'm like. Because it was like three disappointments in a row in 20, 25. Okay, that'll with you, you know, for sure.

[Becky]

Yeah, I can't. I can't really.

[Jess]

That's why this. This was like. This came up in topic that we were like, why don't you try girls instead? And I'm like, I don't know. Like, this is how this started, Jess. Right. We were talking about the disappointment of men.

[Tracy]

Tracy, you know, you have been the last couple years. Tracy has opened her. Her type. You know, she. She's. She's been with all different kinds of people. You know, she's been with nerds. She's been with big, fat, disgusting animals. She's been with, you know, skinny animals. Like, all different kinds of disgusting men.

[Jess]

Like, we.

[Tracy]

Everything, you know?

[Jess]

Yeah, everything. Everything. No, we were. We were really out here trying.

[Becky]

Trying.

[Jess]

Yeah.

[Tracy]

And I'm very proud of her for that because I feel like women, we get caught into our type, right?

[Becky]

Like, we.

[Tracy]

We know what we like and we go after the same thing. And that's how we keep falling into these traps. And what we've found from this research is that doesn't matter. They're all the same. They're all the same. So why not, Tracy, maybe try. Maybe that is the. The key is a female.

[Becky]

You know, there's a couple. A couple fears of mine. One being that you will absolutely break a female's heart.

[Jess]

Yeah, that is. That is the consistent problem is that

[Becky]

that you are used to what happens in a hetero relationship. And you won't know the playground of what it is to be with a woman. Like, the. The sensitivity, the like communication, the. Right. Like, so that scares me. But it might warm you up into what you deserve. Right? Like, you'll have, like, insight into the

[Jess]

way Becky's like, hey, it seems like a great idea, but, like, you seem like a human eater. So I don't like thinking he's like,

[Tracy]

none of my girlfriends.

[Jess]

But, you know, I see what impression

[Becky]

am I given of you? I say that as a person that's like, surrounded by really good people. So, like, there are shitty lesbians out there. It's not like every woman is, is has like the same mindset as I do. I'm just fortunate that like most people in my life are just like genuinely good humans. So that's like my insight. But like you go down the road of like, like hardcore like studs and stuff like that. And it's like you might just get treated like, like they're like, what's this?

[Tracy]

What's a hardcore stud?

[Jess]

Like, you know that.

[Becky]

Tracy.

[Jess]

I assume it's a manly figure of a woman. Like a manly vibe. Like very dominant, very masculine.

[Becky]

Yeah, but it's like, did you have

[Jess]

a picture you could show us? Drop it in the group chat. Like show us like a typical stud.

[Becky]

So. So a stud is, is typically. And I know that like it's. And I didn't mean this in that like thinking this way. But like stud is typically used in like the black culture of like, like super like masculine. Like lesbians. So like even, like, even like a butcher, like I feel like butch and stutter. Like interchangeable studies typically use like in the black community butchers. But like there's like the. Hey mamas. Like that's what. So what,

[Jess]

what is your, like what are your category? Yeah, we figure this out.

[Becky]

I would say I'm pretty neutral, like a chapstick. Like I know that I probably used

[Jess]

that word before, Jess.

[Tracy]

Yeah, I thought you made that up.

[Becky]

And like, and I know that a lot of people, just because of like how I present myself and dress and things would assume that I'd be more like leaning towards like more masculine and like the butch era. But like I am like really soft hearted and like, like my personality is more.

[Jess]

Yeah. So what I think just. And I could probably say about you is that like you're. You have a very good self aware style of your own that you're very pretty to look at because you have beautiful features. But like you're not like feminine pretty. Do you know what I mean? Like you still hold that like masculine like energy. Like clearly you're in charge of the house. Like she's strong.

[Becky]

Like she was.

[Jess]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you wear the pants like we get them.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Jess]

But you're also still very pretty to look at. Do you know what I mean? Like, right, Jess, is that a good.

[Becky]

You guys can come on here anytime you want.

[Jess]

No. Jess, is that like a good accurate, like how we would describe. Describe her now?

[Tracy]

Yeah, but I actually think she is more feminine. She's like in the middle.

[Jess]

Yeah, well, that's why she said she's pretty neutral. Yeah, that makes sense.

[Becky]

It's like chopsticks, chapstick. Yeah, that's what they call it. I don't know about you, but when life gets busy, workouts are the first thing I cut out. Not because I don't care, but because getting to the gym, figuring out what to do, wondering if I'm even doing it right. It's all a lot. That's why I love tonal. It's the ultimate strength training system for a reason. Gives you the convenience of a full gym and the guidance of a personal trainer anytime at home with one sleek system. What I didn't expect was how motivating it is. After a quick assessment, tonal sets the optimal weight for every move and adjusts in 1 pound increments as you get stronger. So you're always challenged. It tracks everything. So instead of guessing if you're making progress, you can actually see it. And no more second guessing your form. Tonal gives you real time coaching cues to dial it in and lift safely and effectively. You can choose from strength to aerial hit to yoga and mobility. So I don't get bored, which is key for me right now. Tonal is offering our listeners 200 off your first Tonal purchase with promo code Karma, that's Tonal.com and use promo code Karma for $200 off your purchase, that's Tonal.com promo code Karma for $200 off. So there's this whole world of hey, mamas. Lesbians on tik tok, right? And like, they are. It's so they're like the cringy, like,

[Jess]

doing it for views.

[Becky]

Yeah, like, yeah, doing things it makes me so uncomfortable to, like, look at.

[Tracy]

Wait, what are they doing for views?

[Becky]

They do, like, fingering videos of, like, themselves. I don't know.

[Jess]

Look up.

[Becky]

Hey, mama's on.

[Jess]

Okay, wait, I think I can explain it. I follow this one person and like, very, like, like body, like, like a guy, but still long hair. And like, girls in the comment section are all like, like, I'm married, but it's not serious. Like, all just like flirting with other. Like, is this making me question my sexuality? Like, here I thought I was straight. Like, all the comments are like that. Do you know what I'm talking about? It's like girls that appeal to wives that are home that are clearly bored, but. And they're doing, they're doing these tick tock dances and tick tock skits and blah, blah, blah to make straight girls, like, come to their comment section.

[Becky]

I feel so I'm not gonna show this person, because I feel bad, even, like, showing. But this is someone that it's like, satire. Like, she is impersonating. Like, it says point of view. Hey, mamas go live. Oh, that's not direct.

[Jess]

Yeah, he was a clickbait.

[Becky]

Yeah, they like. What's everyone doing?

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

What?

[Becky]

You look good. I heard you. You're gonna compliment me back. Yeah, it's, like, today, but I have in the past. It's just like. Just go down the rabbit hole, look up ticks. Like, Google it yourself and go down that rabbit.

[Jess]

Yeah. Like, there's so many different tiers. I feel like they are so uncultured with that.

[Becky]

Yeah. They act like they're like teenage boys, like, trying to, like, infiltrate, like, the female psyche, you know?

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

That's a.

[Tracy]

Hey, mama.

[Becky]

Hey, mama. Yeah, that's what. Because they.

[Jess]

Come on. This is crazy.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Tracy]

Hey, mom.

[Becky]

I'll send you. I'll send you guys some tick tocks to wait.

[Jess]

So if you were to set me up with somebody, what would you say I the type of girl that I would be set up with?

[Becky]

Like, I feel like you. Because you're so attracted to, like, like, that female presenting. I feel like you need someone who is more, like, neutral. But, like, so there's a lot of neutral lesbians beyond, like, not like me, who dress both ways. Like, dress super feminine. Like, like, wear makeup, enjoy that, but also dress, like, like, masculine sometimes, but are just, like, beautiful like that. Like, when you look at them, they're, like, beautiful. I feel like you would need someone more like that because I think you still need that, like, masculine energy to, like.

[Jess]

That's my problem is that, like, I just want to be, like, just a girl. I want to turn my brain off and, like, I want to do nothing ever. And that's why I'm always like, oh, I need a guy who likes coming and, like, dominate and take over because, like, I don't want to.

[Becky]

Why don't you date with a girl and see what happens?

[Jess]

I've been asked so many times, and I'm always like, oh, I just don't date girls.

[Becky]

Like, yeah, but, like, what's the harm?

[Jess]

I just think that, like, in my mind, I'm so set to, like, if I date a girl. I know.

[Becky]

I.

[Jess]

When. Whenever I've been in a situation like that, like, I have ended up taking over.

[Becky]

You have it what?

[Jess]

I have ended up taking over, taking control, taking charge. And I'm just like, I don't want that responsibility. That seems like a lot.

[Becky]

So I think, like, I'm not Asking you to date a girl. Like, like, you should go on a one date.

[Jess]

Yeah. Yeah, I would be set. If you have someone to set me up with. I will go.

[Becky]

Let me think about it. I don't like, have many queer friends. Like, I do. But like, I. My direct circle of people aren't queer.

[Jess]

I'm like given up on everybody and I think I'm fully like, accepting that it may just be me and the kids forever.

[Becky]

So I'm just like, no, I tr. I think life is. I think like, life is beautiful and like, and should be lived with someone, but like, not the wrong person because the person that you're living with should be like, adding value to it. I just think it's really cool to find someone that you can spend your life with and like, be happy. And I don't like, but I don't know the thought, the idea of being alone. But I'm also a serial dater. Like, I've in my I lily pad

[Jess]

from one person to another. I don't even like, break in between. Just knows if I'm super compulsive dater. I jump from like one person to the next because I'm like, oh, if that person didn't satisfy that life part that I needed, I'll just find somebody else. And the problem is, is that they're all online waiting. Like, there's literally a line waiting. So, like I could just hand pick out of that line and they'll just be ready when I want. And that's my issue.

[Becky]

There's a line waiting. No, no.

[Jess]

Right. Just like it, it's. Yeah, no, they're literally like. And I've said to them, like, I'm not interested in you. And they'll be like, well, I'm here when you're ready to be interested in me. And I could literally call them right now and be like, like, let's get married. And they would sign paperwork. Like, there's a bunch of them waiting. And I don't know why, because I'm not. I've not led them to believe that we are going to be together, but somehow they have this like, lost hope that they're waiting.

[Becky]

Jess, are you her dating assistant?

[Jess]

She's my. Yeah, therapist for sure.

[Tracy]

I really.

[Becky]

It's been a journey. Are you guys in therapy?

[Jess]

No. I know what my issues are. I don't need somebody to tell me. I'm hyper aware of it. I just like, there's nothing to do about it. Like, and I straight up answer when I'm the problem. I'm like, just. No, I know I'm the issue. Or like, I know I should have done this. It's just like they're. I just didn't.

[Becky]

I find it so fascinating that you both are Scorpios.

[Jess]

Yeah, we're super. We're hyper aware of exactly who we are.

[Becky]

I'm hyper aware of exactly who I am in my problems in life. And I still go to therapy.

[Tracy]

No, I think a supporter of therapy.

[Jess]

I think it's.

[Becky]

It's.

[Tracy]

I think it's a wonderful thing. I. I watch shrinking. I get.

[Becky]

Is a good show.

[Tracy]

Such a good show. What, you watch it?

[Becky]

Yeah. I haven't watched the new season, but.

[Tracy]

Oh, my God, Apple TV comes out

[Becky]

with really good shows.

[Tracy]

You'll be crying. You already got your crying. And you'll get some more crying and.

[Becky]

Yeah. Wait, I'm just so fast, like. Jess, how long have you been married?

[Tracy]

Seven years. Seven year itch.

[Jess]

You know what I'm saying than that, Jess, doesn't it?

[Tracy]

Well, I was. I was with my husband for a very long time before we got married.

[Becky]

How long?

[Tracy]

Like probably seven years.

[Becky]

How old were you when you started dating?

[Tracy]

Well, without giving my age away, we have a very kind of interesting story because we went to high school together, but we didn't. We weren't together in high school. But then after high school, I got drunk one night and we hooked up. And he told a friend, this was like a random night. He told a friend that I was the best blow job he ever had. So then years later, when that friend told me, I was like, you know, I was like, what'd you say about me? Tell me more. And I got drunk again. And then that was that.

[Becky]

That was that.

[Tracy]

So that's my love story.

[Becky]

Okay.

[Tracy]

It started with the blowjob.

[Becky]

That's how all, all the best stories start, right? Did you guys know that I dated men until I was 19? Wow.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Wow.

[Becky]

What.

[Jess]

What was your, like, breaking point? Did you always know or were you bi at one point?

[Becky]

No, I had no clue. Really? Yeah, I had no clue. And then I like, I'm like naturally, like, I'd like. I'm like, very flirty. And I was really bad in, in college. Not bad. Like, that was just like my personality. And I flirted with everyone. Boys, girls, like, didn't matter. I only dated men.

[Jess]

What is Becky like me, but like advanced version of me? Like, am I on my way to be Becky? Maybe that's literally how I am. I flirt with everyone. It doesn't matter.

[Becky]

I just think it's Fun. It's, like, enjoyable. Like, I enjoy getting that connection with people. But I like, this girl who I flirted with, who I knew it was gay, didn't flirt with me back. And I was like, I'm like, what's going on?

[Jess]

Yeah.

[Becky]

And she was hot. And, like, I was like, wow, do I. Like, what is this? And then I dated her for four years.

[Jess]

So you ended up getting her anyway.

[Becky]

Yeah, for sure.

[Jess]

But, like, the challenge.

[Becky]

Yeah, but I've. I've done my. Like, I used to flirt with girls, and after I came out, I would flirt with straight girls, convince them to, like, hook up with me, and then not because, like, that was my boundary. Like, I would not, like, cross that line of things. Yeah, I lived quite a life. But, yeah, I wasted a lot of time, a lot, a lot of my youth on men. That's why it's really interesting. Like, queer people are, like, immature later. Like, they don't find maturity till later because they don't really live authentically until later. So, like, when people experience, like, their first heartbreak in high school and just, like, relationships, it's like, when we come out later, like, those things aren't relevant to our real life. Like, our real life doesn't really start until we start.

[Jess]

Like, do you think that's why, like, lesbians are known to, like, move their relationship really quick? Because it's like, we wasted so much time in the past. Like, I don't want to waste any more time. So, like, I feel like a lot of girls really fast or date really fast or.

[Becky]

It's called hauling. That's like. Yeah, and I don't think that's the reason. I think it's just because we're just, like, so emotional. Like, emotionally. You get emotionally connected. Well, this is how I explain it, right? Like, this is. This is my pitch of, like, why all most women are capable of dating women. Like, it's. It's really easy when you think about your best friends and you think about, like, the most important people in your life. Like, like, being females. Like, you love them. You love them with your whole heart, right? Like, so you're already capable of being in love with a female. You get jealous when they hang out with other people. You. You feel those emotions from that relationship. So when you add someone like myself to the mix, that is gay. And so, like, we could be building a friendship in the same way that you would be building a friendship with someone else. But because I'm gay, it makes you, like, question, why am I falling in love with this person? When, like, you easily fall in love with another female all the time as, like, from a friendship perspective. But when you have someone that, like, has that experience, it makes you, like, question yourself. Like, oh, like, am I falling in love with them because, like, I want to hook up with them? Because you know that that is a possibility with them. Right. So, like, yeah, but it's so weird

[Jess]

because there's not one, like, really best friend that I have that I would

[Becky]

ever hook up with. Yeah, but that's not the point. Like, the point is, is that you love your best friends. Yeah. Right. Like, you have an emotional connection to them.

[Jess]

Yeah, yeah. Would do anything.

[Becky]

They're not gay, so there's never that thought of, like, okay, okay, okay. You know what I mean? Yeah. So, like, everyone's capable of falling in love with a female. It's like that hump of the physical aspect that. But once you fall in love with someone, it's. It's easy to kind of nurture that physical. Anyhow, it's been great talking to you. We were going to get into a karma and cast, but I don't have time because I have to go and do my duties of life. How do you any. And where can people find you,

[Jess]

Jess?

[Tracy]

You could find us on Instagram, just at Jess Hottie. Tracy DeMarco and bad examples Podcast. Please come listen to our show. It is the most fun show. We have a great time. Next week, we're doing foot fetish episode. Our podcast is a little different. You know, we kind of go by topics. So you can go through our episodes and you can pick a topic that you're interested in. Start there. You know, we did an episode last week about cheating. We have an episode coming up about the other woman. Because we just had a story about a man that had a secret life, you know, a whole nother family, which was really interesting. And, you know, we had the girl that didn't know that the guy she was with had a wife and kids, and she was dating this guy for five years and had no idea. So people were like, I want to hear the other woman's side of the story.

[Becky]

So we're gonna go there.

[Tracy]

So we have a lot of fun on the show. You know, a lot of it's Tracy's dating life. Making fun of Tracy. Kind of like what I was saying before. I like to sneak attack Tracy. She doesn't know really what's prepared for the day. And then I'm like, hey, it's a foot fetish episode, and we're sending your feet to the guy to judge know stuff like that. So it's a good time. So come over, hang out. Our listeners are called baddies and we just have a really good time. We're like a big family.

[Becky]

Our listeners are called karmaroos, if you wanted to know.

[Tracy]

I know I, I saw that before and that's very cute.

[Becky]

Kayl has a foot finder so you might want to get her input on like how her selling her feet.

[Jess]

Oh, wonderful. Yeah. So I made a feed finder like a month ago and like, it, it hits randomly. Like, there's no like system that I've figured out yet. So I'm like learning. But I was like, like it right at this point. Like I walk around with in sandals and high heels all the time. Like, why not have pictures of them? It just seems so stupid not to.

[Tracy]

What do they write on your wall? Like when you, your wall.

[Becky]

What is this? What am I really showing my age or Facebook?

[Tracy]

What do they comment on your feet? Like, whenever you expose your feet, they're like, why?

[Jess]

Oh, people write no free feet or stop showing your feet for free. You should be charging people for this. And I was like, okay, like, relax.

[Becky]

Do you have nice.

[Jess]

And then I was like, wait, hold on.

[Becky]

Are they right?

[Tracy]

She does have nice feet that. Listen, the foot Professional judge Tracy's feet, he liked them. I think he rated them a 10.

[Becky]

Yeah, well, it was. We'll have you guys back. Maybe next time Kayl will be here. We really didn't break up. She.

[Tracy]

I want to have you on our show. I want to talk.

[Becky]

I would love to come. The only thing, like, I can't get too dirty, like, I am a corporate girly, you know, keep it pg.

[Tracy]

I actually want to talk to you about being a new mom and the motherhood journey because.

[Becky]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Tracy]

I, I, you know, I still have a two year old at home. Tracy's a little bit past this stage, but I'm very much still in it where I'm drowning and you know, I don't. Anytime you post, it's so relatable.

[Becky]

Like, so I, I can come do it in person.

[Tracy]

Oh, okay.

[Jess]

All right.

[Becky]

And that's it. Thank you guys so much for listening. We will see you next time on Carmen Cast. Make sure to like, subscribe, review all the things.

[Jess]

Tracy.

[Becky]

Yes. Thank you for being here. And we will see you guys next time.

[Jess]

See you next time.

[Tracy]

Pluto TV has thousands of free movies and TV shows. With movies like Joe dirt, pixels and 54 first dates. This is awesome.

[Becky]

And TV shows like Survivor, SpongeBob SquarePants. The fairly odd parents and ghosts.

[Tracy]

Pluto TV is always free.

[Becky]

Huzzah.

[Tracy]

Pluto TV. Stream now pay. Never.

[Jess]

You're welcome. Hi, I'm Lauren. And I'm Chandler. And we're the hosts of Pop Apologist Podcast, a weekly podcast devoted to celebrity gossip, Hollywood deep dives, Real Housewives drama, and anything and everything. Taylor Swift. We're two sisters who make no apologies for our love of pop culture and the fact that a listers might mean more to us than each other. Join us on your favorite podcast app every Wednesday for Pop Apologists. Pop Apologists, your new favorite sister and celeb podcast.