Best of Episode: Love & Pain - Karma & Chaos with Kail Lowry & Becky Hayter

Summary4 min read

Podcast Summary: Karma & Chaos with Kail Lowry & Becky Hayter Best of Episode: Love & Pain
Release Date: October 22, 2024

Introduction to Love and Relationship Reflections

In this standout episode of Karma & Chaos, hosts Kail Lowry and Becky Hayter delve deep into the intricate dynamics of love and the accompanying pains that often intertwine with it. They begin by reflecting on their past relationships, questioning whether their feelings were genuine or influenced by the tumultuous nature of their 30s.

Becky Hayter [03:33]: "Teenagers really are in love. Like, real love."

Understanding the Three Loves Theory

The conversation pivots to a discussion about the "three loves" theory, which posits that individuals fall in love three significant times in their lives, each teaching different lessons—love, pain, and patience.

Kail Lowry [05:57]: "You have three true loves in life. The first one teaches you what love is. The second teaches you pain. And the third teaches you patience and balance."

Becky shares her personal journey, identifying how each relationship has shaped her understanding of love and the inevitable pain that accompanied them. She opens up about feeling that her past relationships blended love with toxicity, making it challenging to disentangle genuine affection from harmful patterns.

Navigating Modern Parenthood and Budgeting

Transitioning from personal relationships, Kail and Becky discuss the financial strains of raising children, particularly the rising costs of clothing and essentials. They exchange tips on finding affordable yet quality items, expressing frustration over the inflated prices of children's apparel compared to more affordable retailers like Walmart.

Becky Hayter [12:41]: "Why are we paying that much money? And the shoes are like 60."

The hosts emphasize the importance of budgeting and making smart shopping choices to manage the constant need for children’s growing wardrobes without breaking the bank.

The Challenges of Step Parenting and Social Media Influence

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to the complexities of step-parenting. Kail and Becky express their concerns over Facebook groups that derogate stepchildren, highlighting the negative impact such forums can have on families.

Kail Lowry [41:05]: "If you're in that group, I don't want your view."

They advocate for healthier coping mechanisms, such as seeking therapy or open communication within the family, rather than venting negativity in online groups. The hosts stress the importance of mutual respect and love in blended families, admonishing listeners to prioritize their children's well-being over external judgments.

Maintaining Healthy Relationships Through Communication

Kail and Becky delve into strategies for sustaining healthy relationships amidst the chaos of adult life. They discuss the significance of recognizing each other's love languages, effective communication, and the willingness to compromise.

Becky Hayter [62:25]: "Because you’re not always going to be in love in your relationship. You’re choosing to love that person."

The conversation underscores the necessity of continuous effort and understanding to navigate the evolving dynamics of marriage and partnerships, especially when one partner is a stay-at-home parent and the other is juggling work and personal commitments.

Personal Anecdotes and Empowerment

Towards the end of the episode, the hosts share personal stories that highlight their resilience and empowerment in overcoming relationship challenges. Becky recounts an encounter with her ex-partner, illustrating her strength and refusal to settle for unhealthy dynamics.

Becky Hayter [71:38]: "Mama didn't raise no punk."

Kail echoes this sentiment, reinforcing the message that self-worth and mutual respect are paramount in any relationship. They encourage listeners to value themselves and seek fulfilling partnerships where both individuals support and uplift each other.

Conclusion: Embracing Karma and Navigating Chaos

Throughout the episode, Kail and Becky blend humor with heartfelt discussions, offering relatable insights into the rollercoaster of modern adulthood. They conclude by reaffirming their commitment to supporting each other and their listeners through the unpredictable mix of karma and chaos that life presents.

Notable Quotes:

Becky Hayter [03:33]: "Teenagers really are in love. Like, real love."
Kail Lowry [05:57]: "You have three true loves in life. The first one teaches you what love is. The second teaches you pain. And the third teaches you patience and balance."
Becky Hayter [12:41]: "Why are we paying that much money? And the shoes are like 60."
Kail Lowry [41:05]: "If you're in that group, I don't want your view."
Becky Hayter [62:25]: "Because you’re not always going to be in love in your relationship. You’re choosing to love that person."
Becky Hayter [71:38]: "Mama didn't raise no punk."

Key Takeaways:

Reflection on Past Relationships: Understanding the lessons learned from each significant relationship and recognizing patterns of love and pain.
Financial Management in Parenting: Strategies for affordable shopping and budgeting to handle the financial demands of raising children.
Step Parenting Challenges: Navigating the complexities of blended families and mitigating negative influences from social media.
Healthy Relationship Practices: Importance of communication, appreciating each other's love languages, and continuous effort to maintain a strong partnership.
Empowerment and Self-Worth: Encouraging self-respect and the pursuit of fulfilling relationships that honor both individuals’ needs and contributions.

Conclusion:

This episode of Karma & Chaos with Kail Lowry & Becky Hayter offers a comprehensive exploration of love's multifaceted nature, the pains intertwined with relationships, and the strategies to overcome them. Through honest conversations, personal anecdotes, and empowering advice, Kail and Becky provide a relatable and uplifting narrative for listeners navigating the complexities of modern adulthood.

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[00:00]
Sponsor Voice
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[00:58]
Novo Nordisk Representative
Sponsored by Novo Nordisk.
[00:59]
Speaker C
Hola.
[01:00]
Novo Nordisk Representative
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[01:03]
Speaker C
Okay.
[01:04]
Novo Nordisk Representative
People with conditions like obesity, type 2 diabetes or high blood pressure could be at risk for a potentially life threatening liver disease called mash, or metabolic dysfunction associated steatohepatitis.
[01:15]
Speaker D
Whoa.
[01:16]
Speaker E
I could be at risk?
[01:17]
Speaker C
I'll ask my doctor.
[01:18]
Novo Nordisk Representative
You're bilingual?
[01:20]
Speaker C
No, I speak liver now.
[01:21]
Speaker E
I'm trilingual.
[01:23]
Novo Nordisk Representative
Ask your doctor about your risk and if you should be screened for MASH. Learn more at speaking speakliver.com all right.
[01:29]
Speaker F
Baby mamas, we have some updates coming next week and the following, so stay tuned.
[01:50]
Speaker E
Baby mamas.
[01:51]
Speaker C
Baby mamas. Hello, V. Hi.
[01:54]
Speaker E
We had a great week.
[01:56]
Speaker C
How are you feeling?
[01:57]
Speaker E
Still on a high from Tuesday. Like, it just is so crazy because we're still getting tagged.
[02:03]
Speaker C
Yeah. Everyone is, like really happy with how everything came out so well.
[02:07]
Speaker E
Also, I feel like the episode that aired that day was also really good. I have a couple updates. I did update this in the caption. Okay, the baby mom of Blake Griffin's son, she was not a stripper. She was an ex porn star. But I looked at her Instagram. Homegirl got like 16 million followers. Like, she's really. Yeah.
[02:26]
Speaker C
Like, she.
[02:29]
Speaker E
So she don't need Blakey Blake's money.
[02:31]
Speaker C
Wow.
[02:32]
Speaker E
And I feel bad that I didn't know who she was before, but I guess I wonder if I'VE ever watched her porn.
[02:39]
Speaker C
I want. I wonder that too, because she didn't look very familiar to me because I did go to her page, but I.
[02:44]
Speaker E
Also can't think of, like, outside of, like, Mia Khalifa. I don't recognize any. Like, I guess I don't pay attention to, like, women's faces in the porn.
[02:54]
Speaker C
Industry or, like, names or anything.
[02:55]
Speaker E
Yeah. So. But I guess she, like, does her own thing. Like, she has her own, like, collab for, like, lingerie and stuff. So, like, good for her.
[03:02]
Speaker C
Oh, thank you.
[03:04]
Speaker E
And so I thought that was cool. And then there was another update I wanted to give, actually. Oh. Last week we were talking about how. Remember how we were talking about, like, our relationships and how, like, we shouldn't have been in them and we probably weren't really in love and things like that?
[03:18]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[03:18]
Speaker E
I just so happen to be scrolling on Tik Tok. And this psychiatrist gets on and she does a video and she's like, it's like, things that I help parents understand if they would just listen to their teenagers. And one of them was, teenagers really are in love. Like, real love.
[03:34]
Speaker C
Oh, yeah. I feel. I feel like I was definitely in love.
[03:37]
Speaker E
Like, it's not the same love that we feel now.
[03:40]
Speaker C
No, I think that we were in love. Yeah. Like, I feel like love elevates, like, as you go, like, you start to just know the meaning of it more.
[03:47]
Speaker E
Right.
[03:47]
Speaker C
And you know the concept of it. But at that time, we don't know the concept of it. We just know it's like a feeling we know, like, head over heels with this person. Like, it's definitely more than a. Like, okay, you know that. But I feel. Yeah, I definitely get.
[03:59]
Speaker E
That makes sense to me. But I was like, I need to update this. So I put that.
[04:02]
Speaker C
That's wild that that popped up this. Isn't it funny how every time you talk about something, it just, like, so weird.
[04:07]
Speaker E
Yeah, she was. So the psychologist says that teens are in love, real love. So maybe I was wrong, because I feel like last week I was kind of going off of, like, I wasn't really in love. Like, I didn't know what to. I did. Definitely didn't know what to do with those feelings. And it probably was still toxic, but I definitely think. I agree. Like, I do think it was.
[04:22]
Speaker C
I think it's just different stages of love that we go through. Like, it's like. Like, you know how they call it, quote, unquote, puppy love?
[04:30]
Speaker E
Yeah.
[04:30]
Speaker C
I think it's just that because we're still little, like, we're still young.
[04:33]
Speaker E
Okay.
[04:33]
Speaker C
But I don't think it takes away the fact that it was still love.
[04:36]
Speaker E
Have you ever heard the theory that you love. You're in love with three people in your lifetime?
[04:41]
Speaker C
Yes. The first one was to, like, teach you. What is it like? I remember that. I feel like we did hit on that, but not, like, we didn't get too deep into it, like, a long time ago.
[04:51]
Speaker E
Is it true that you fall in love three times? A study has shown that a person can fall in love at least three times in their lifetime. Okay. This is a three loves theory. It's centered around the idea that over the course of our lifetime, we will fall head over heels in love three times. As we progress through each love, we grow, evolve, and inevitably, inevitably get our hearts broken. But what are the three?
[05:14]
Speaker C
It was like, check the images, because sometimes the image will pop up. Yeah.
[05:19]
Speaker E
The one that you never see coming, the one that actually lasts, and the one that shows us why it never worked out before.
[05:27]
Speaker C
I have. I've had each of those, and at a young age.
[05:32]
Speaker E
This one says, before you can grow up, you must fall in love three times. Once you must fall in love with your best friend, ruining your friendship forever. Once you must fall in love with someone you believe to be perfect. And once, you must fall in love with someone who is exactly like you, which I don't know if I agree with those.
[05:49]
Speaker C
This one says you have three true loves in life. You. Your first teaches you what love is. Your second teaches you pain. That one third teaches you patience and balance.
[05:58]
Speaker E
That's the one. That's the one. The second one teaches you pain. So I agree with that whole. Are each of these my baby daddies? No, I don't.
[06:07]
Speaker C
You weren't in a relationship back to back with them? I feel like. It's like, though. I feel like whatever relationship made an impact on you, like, when you were younger, like, and then those two that come after, like, I think your pain might have been Javi.
[06:23]
Speaker E
I don't think that Javi falls in any of those categories.
[06:27]
Speaker C
No, no. But you went through a lot of pain in your marriage.
[06:34]
Speaker E
I think the pain was Chris.
[06:37]
Speaker C
Okay, see, like that. All right, then that can be it.
[06:41]
Speaker E
What was the first one?
[06:42]
Speaker C
The first one is, it teaches you what love is. So who do you think taught you, like, what love was?
[06:54]
Speaker E
See, but Chris, I. Okay, so prior to Chris, I know that I had been in relationships that were toxic, but I do feel like I experienced love. I don't think that I experienced my full capability when I'm in love with someone. Until I was with Chris. Chris taught me that I would go to the ends of the earth for someone that I love.
[07:15]
Speaker C
Yeah. So he was kind of both for you. That's weird. Like, you're not like that first and the second.
[07:22]
Speaker E
But it was also like the infatuation thing too, because the sex was there, but that could have also been trauma and, like, the breadcrumbing thing. Yeah. So I need to set. I need to, like, dig into this because I also like the guy that I lost my virginity to, John, that I talked to you guys about before. I cared about him and I loved him at the time, but I don't think that, like, I loved Matt about Matt. Matt. I was.
[07:48]
Speaker C
So he might have taught you, like, what love was, but even though it.
[07:51]
Speaker E
Was, he also taught me pain.
[07:53]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[07:53]
Speaker E
Like, big time pain. So I feel like all of my relationship were love and love and pain. So that's why maybe. And that's why I associate pain with love. Because my mom.
[08:04]
Speaker C
Yeah, well, if you think about it, we're not with any of those exes anyway, so pain did come along with the love regardless, because we're not with them.
[08:11]
Speaker E
How fucking weird. So those. Anyway, those were my two updates.
[08:14]
Speaker C
That's so crazy to think about.
[08:16]
Speaker E
I was just like, how it's like it should be.
[08:18]
Speaker C
They should replace pain with toxicity. Because it was like, love. Okay, that was fine. And then we. We like our second partners, the ones that came along. Like, that was pure toxicity. Like, that's what the fuck that was. And then the ones that come after, like, I guess they teach you patience. And, like, that would be like, Elijah for you.
[08:36]
Speaker E
He definitely is teaching me, like, balance. Like 100 balance. It was so weird because, like, this morning he was leaving for work and he always says bye to me or whatever, and I guess he was, like, running late or something. And he gave me an attitude, and I was, like, half asleep, so I didn't give a fuck. But then he came in before, he said, before he left, and he was like, I'm sorry for just giving you attitude. I'm. I'm running. Like, I'm sorry. So it's really nice when I can be in a relationship where we can apologize right off the bat for, like, we notice something that we do.
[09:07]
Speaker C
He realizes his own faults and something.
[09:10]
Speaker E
And I do the same.
[09:10]
Speaker C
Didn't want to do to you. And he came back and he fixed it.
[09:13]
Speaker E
Yeah. Like, if I, like, before or something, I'm like, sorry, I didn't mean to do that. You know what I mean? Like, recognize it right away. Where, like, before in my other relationships, we'd be fighting for like six days.
[09:21]
Speaker C
You guys, like, respect each other. I feel so weird. And the relationship.
[09:24]
Speaker E
Never been, never experienced.
[09:26]
Speaker C
Never experienced that. Can't relate. She's like, I don't know what this is.
[09:30]
Speaker E
Millions have it.
[09:31]
Speaker C
No, I feel like that, that's the thing. I feel like me and Joe kind of, we do that too. I mean, sometimes I'm a little more hard headed, but I'll always be like, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, like, do that.
[09:39]
Speaker E
Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. Okay. So I don't know what else we were gonna talk about.
[09:45]
Speaker C
No, I did. I. I mean, I don't think we talked enough about the Galentine Day thing, but I had so much fun and I wanted to thank every single person.
[09:52]
Speaker E
Literally. So fun.
[09:53]
Speaker C
I had so much fun. And everyone. I. I went on my questions on Instagram and people were saying, like, I was like, what was like your favorite part? And there were so many different. There were so many different ones that people were talking about, but one was like, everyone kept basically saying when you were taking shots. And I was like, literally. That was like my favorite too, because I've never, like sat here and took shots with Kale before. So it was so freaking funny. I was like, I can't believe she's actually doing this in one.
[10:19]
Speaker E
There will be drinking involved.
[10:21]
Speaker C
Oh, yeah, for sure. I feel like it just like helped, like, loosen up. We were a little nervous. Well, you were making me so nervous.
[10:27]
Speaker E
I'm sorry. I was so nervous. Like, I just literally was like, what if no one shows up? Like, imposter syndrome.
[10:34]
Speaker C
It was so funny. And then my friend text me that night, because after you text her, she.
[10:38]
Speaker E
Was like, what the is going on?
[10:39]
Speaker C
And I posted it in the, in the Facebook group. And it was so funny. She was like. I was like, this was a little weird, but I was like, it. I'm down for a little sex talk.
[10:47]
Speaker E
I literally was like, I. I don't know if people will show up, but I. When people started tagging me, they were like, are you hacked? Like, did you get hacked on my Instagram because of my bio? Were you here?
[10:59]
Speaker C
Everyone thought, Everyone thought that you changed your bio or like, that you didn't change. Change your bios that I got.
[11:04]
Speaker E
And I was like, oh, no, that was that. And nobody. Chris replied to my Cash app, but Malik did not respond.
[11:11]
Speaker C
He liked it.
[11:12]
Speaker E
He liked it.
[11:12]
Speaker C
Yeah, respond. So that's the update on that That's.
[11:15]
Speaker E
Yeah. And then one of the guys that I hooked up with that I had to text, and I said, I see you.
[11:20]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[11:20]
Speaker E
He texted me at, like, 2am and was like, you see me? Oh, no.
[11:25]
Speaker C
He's probably like, where the hell is this? She's, like, hiding in my closet right now.
[11:28]
Speaker E
Kristen fixed my email.
[11:29]
Speaker C
Oh, good.
[11:30]
Speaker E
You guys, I have gone through absolute hell for the past two days. I have not been able to send or receive emails. So I was trying to send stuff and get stuff out of the drive, like the Google Drive, but for some reason, it wasn't working.
[11:43]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[11:43]
Speaker E
So I kept trying to send emails, and it kept saying, like, not delivered, not delivered, not delivered. And I was getting so irritated because I, like, communicate through email for a lot of, like, business things.
[11:51]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[11:51]
Speaker E
And Kristen would be like. She was, like, kind of getting frustrated with me the other day, and she's like, I sent it in your email kill.
[11:56]
Speaker C
And I'm like, I don't have access.
[11:58]
Speaker E
And then she realized because she's also through my account, she said, fix it. We'll start getting through the day perfect.
[12:06]
Speaker C
So funny. Oh, my God. So last night I was so aggravated because I usually. First of all, Vivi has already grown out of so many things from Christmas. Like, she's had, like, three sneakers that she's already grown out of.
[12:17]
Speaker E
No.
[12:17]
Speaker C
And I'm like, calm the down.
[12:20]
Speaker E
Calm down.
[12:21]
Speaker C
I'm like, can you please, like, just relax a little bit? I was trying to put some fingers on her this morning. They didn't fit. I was like, what the. Like, I. We just got these.
[12:29]
Speaker E
Yeah.
[12:29]
Speaker C
And yesterday, like, her pajamas are starting to fit her really tight. So I usually shop at children's place for, like, some pajamas if I don't go to Walmart, whatever. Like, one little pair of, like, a pajama top and a set. Yeah. Like a short with a shirt. Like, literally, if it wasn't for the 30 off, it was originally, like, 30 bucks.
[12:47]
Speaker E
No, I'm not paying 30 for pajamas for my kid. No way.
[12:51]
Speaker C
And it had, like, a 30 off thing, but it was like, 20 something. I was like, I can get this same set at, like, Walmart, and it's basically, like, the same type of materials. Like, it's nothing that crazy. So I was like. I was literally looking at a Sondra, and I felt like such a mom because I'm like, these fucking pajama sets are, like, 30 bucks. Like, what the hell? I used to always shop at children's place and never had an issue with.
[13:10]
Speaker E
Like, well, inflation is Real.
[13:11]
Speaker C
It really, truly is. It's doing something right now.
[13:14]
Speaker E
The other day for Lincoln's basketball game, Luxon Creed's cousin wanted to come. And normally I don't. We don't eat out during the week, but Because I'm not gonna send his. Him home without eating, you know.
[13:27]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[13:27]
Speaker E
So we go to McDonald's. A McDonald's meal, like a nugget meal is 9.99.
[13:32]
Speaker C
Yeah. Well, you don't eat out during the week.
[13:34]
Speaker E
Only Fridays now.
[13:35]
Speaker C
Okay.
[13:36]
Speaker E
So that's like our new thing that we try.
[13:37]
Speaker C
And even when he has practices and stuff. You like.
[13:40]
Speaker E
Okay, we just started that.
[13:41]
Speaker C
Sometimes I feel like after gymnastics we'd be like, can we just get McDonald's? Because she gets out of. Like, she gets out late.
[13:47]
Speaker E
Yeah, totally.
[13:47]
Speaker C
But if Joe, like, cooks, I'm like, no, whatever. But sometimes we do, like, trying to smell. Stop it. Because I'm like, I don't want her eating McDonald's every week like that.
[13:56]
Speaker E
See, that's. It's not even that. I mean, obviously, like, that's like a bonus, like not eating fast food. But it was more about like the cost of everything.
[14:02]
Speaker C
That's very true.
[14:03]
Speaker E
I was spending so much because of inflation, so I said, well, if we get McDonald's, I said, we're not eating out on Friday because Friday is like pizza or takeout sometimes. We get Chinese sometimes. And we've been doing it for a month. And I actually love it. Like, I don't.
[14:16]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[14:17]
Speaker E
Crave fast food. Although I did get Buffalo Wild Wings the other day for myself.
[14:20]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[14:21]
Speaker E
But that so many people in my family, it's so expensive. But we went to. They both wanted a 10 piece meal, and it was 999 for each. And I was like, what the actual fuck? But it's funny that you bring up the clothing thing because yesterday I was going on Amazon to pick out. I don't. Do you have a sock problem at your house?
[14:41]
Speaker C
I have sock problems, yeah.
[14:43]
Speaker E
My kids appear, they disappear.
[14:45]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[14:46]
Speaker E
No, literally, when Lux came down this morning, he didn't have socks because he only had soccer socks left. Two pairs of soccer socks.
[14:52]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[14:53]
Speaker E
Where the fuck are your socks going? Is the dryer eating them?
[14:56]
Speaker C
Yeah, they. They do. Like, there's like a space. There's like a place in the dryer where if you like take it out, you'll find like all the missing socks.
[15:03]
Speaker E
Shut up.
[15:03]
Speaker C
I swear.
[15:04]
Speaker E
Yeah, so I get on Amazon because I was like, let me get him some socks. And then Creed loves Spider Man. That's like his Favorite. So when I found Spider man socks for him, so I was like, let me get these. And then I start getting like matching sets. Because also with littler children. Yeah. Lux is 5 and Credus 2. It's easier for me in the mornings to do matching sets. It's easier for Lux to get the same thing. So I get on and I place an order for the SoC box and I start ordering the. I'm pulling up my order right now. The sets.
[15:30]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[15:31]
Speaker E
For a toddler, like VB7. And you're saying like around $30 for pajama set.
[15:36]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[15:37]
Speaker E
Well, the matching sets on Amazon for Creed, who's a toddler, are also 35 and $40. They're toddlers. Why are we paying that much money? And the shoes are like 60.
[15:47]
Speaker C
And that's just one pair. Now I remember I would get two. Like, it would come with two sets for 38. Cuz it's like 15. 15, you know what I mean? But I'm like, this is ridiculous. And I'm like, at Walmart, I get her like her little BS, like her pajama gowns and stuff for like 10 bucks. And they last. Like, they last.
[16:03]
Speaker E
Okay, this one that I got is for Creed. A toddlers boys track suit.
[16:08]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[16:09]
Speaker E
$37.99 for one set.
[16:19]
Speaker F
All right, let's talk about Good American. Y'all know if you follow me on Instagram, I've been wearing Good American for years. Like five, six years probably. And I absolutely love them when I tell you that Good American jeans have fit me at every single size. My weight fluctuates. Right. Like, you guys have followed me throughout the years from 16 and pregnant all the way until now. And I cannot tell you a single time where I have maintained the same figure, the same weight for a very long time. I'm sort of fluctuating, especially in pregnancy and after. And so I absolutely love Good American jeans. And as the years go on, they just keep getting better and better. If you're looking for the perfect fit, Good Americans always fits denim. Use a one size, fits four design that adapts to your body's changes and fluctuations. So that's me, right? Like over the years, pregnancy changes your body. And I'm here to say that Good American is worth every penny. They have flexible denim comfort, and they have inclusive sizing, which is really, really important, especially here on baby mamas, because V is a very different size than me. And I absolutely love that Good American has styles that fit both me and V. That says a lot about the versatility of their styles. They have skinny jeans, boot cut, high waisted, cropped and good. American offers a wide variety of styles that cater to every preference and occasion. You guys can use code BMND for 50 off your first pair, which is huge. 50 is a big deal. Shop now@goodamerican.com use promo code BMND for 50 off your 1st pair. Don't forget to select podcast at checkout and choose our show to let them know that we sent you. Seasons are changing. That means the produce section is changing. Fruits and vegetables may or may not be your strong suit or your kids strong suit. And I don't know if your kids are anything like my kids, but my kids don't really love their vegetables. So we love to fill in the gaps with Haya.
[18:04]
Speaker E
Ha.
[18:05]
Speaker F
Are kids vitamins? Haya vitamins are very different than a typical children's vitamin, right? Because the typical ones are basically candy in disguise. They're filled with two tablespoons of sugar, unhealthy chemicals and other gummy junk that we don't want our kids eating. But I have news for you. Haya is made with zero sugar and zero gummy junk and it tastes great. It's great for picky eaters. I don't know about anybody else's four year old, but my four year old doesn't want to eat anything that is good for him. And HIA fills the most common gaps in every modern children's diet to provide the full body nourishment our kids need with the yummy taste they love. It's non gmo, vegan, dairy free, allergy free, gelatin free, nut free and everything else that you can imagine. They're reusable bottles that the vitamins go in and my kids love putting the stickers around the jars and making their own little, their own little sticker picture on their on their bottles. They love it. So if you guys want to try this, we've worked out a special deal with Haya for their best selling children's vitamin. Receive 50 off your first order. And to claim this deal you must go to hiah health.com baby mama. This deal is not available on their regular website, but if you go to H I Y a H e a l t h.com baby mama you can get your kids the full body nourishment they need to grow into healthy adults.
[19:25]
Speaker C
This was one of the things I actually used to like doing, like shopping for BB's clothes and stuff like that and now it just stresses me out because I'm like This is so expensive.
[19:33]
Speaker E
This one for Lux that I got is plain. It's just like the one I'm wearing when it's green.
[19:37]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[19:38]
Speaker E
For a five year old is 39, 38.
[19:40]
Speaker C
Is it like a name brand?
[19:42]
Speaker E
No, there's nothing on it. It's completely plain. Just like what I'm wearing right now.
[19:45]
Speaker C
It's insane.
[19:46]
Speaker E
And I bought two of them for him and two of them for Creed. And I had to get Creed new Lux, new shoes. Lux goes through shoes like crazy. So I ordered him some shoes. And for a five year old, we're talking like 60, 70, and they're gonna just get up. They're not like us, you know what I mean?
[20:02]
Speaker C
It's so hard too, because it's like they are constantly growing. So like when I was. I was telling Alessandro, I'm like, this is ridiculous. And I'm like. And I feel bad because, like, I. She likes the clothes from Children's Place. Like, she loves the pajamas and stuff. But I'm like, it's not worth it for me to spend that. And then you're gonna grow out of it in like, I don't know how many months, you know, like, so I'd rather get something from Walmart. Like, she likes that too. But sometimes I feel bad because I'm like, I mean, just want to spend the extra money. You don't want to spend it? Yeah. And like sneakers too. Like, I just get her like, whatever. Like, I try not to even get her like Adidas or Nikes or something. I mean, she does like, if I go to Shoe Carnival and get like a good deal or whatever, like, that's different. But I'm like, half of the time, like, the stuff that she wants is so expensive. And I'm like, girl, I got last.
[20:44]
Speaker E
Night were from Zappos. And I got. I got Lux black and white. Because, yeah, I. We have a problem where like, nothing. He'll get like, he'll pick out like wild colors.
[20:57]
Speaker C
Yeah. And they don't match them. That's how BB is.
[20:59]
Speaker E
And so the ones that I.
[21:01]
Speaker C
That I'm like, I don't.
[21:03]
Speaker E
48, 64 and 48.
[21:06]
Speaker C
Yeah. I'm like, I wouldn't mind getting them if I knew they were going to last you like all year. Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, you're growing out of them like in months.
[21:13]
Speaker E
I'm like, it's wearing shoes until there's holes in them.
[21:15]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[21:16]
Speaker E
Like, if they lasted like that, I have no problem. So, like, I let Isaac pick out like two pairs of shoes, too, because he'll wear them until the soul.
[21:21]
Speaker C
He wears them too. Yep, that's exactly.
[21:23]
Speaker E
And then Lincoln. Don't even get me started.
[21:26]
Speaker C
But it's so different with the Littles. I'm like, it doesn't make sense, honestly, to spend the money on, like, expensive stuff brands or anything like that, because it literally makes no cents. But so now that I went to Target the other day and I started, like, her spring stuff and everything, they had really cute stuff there, but there too. I'm like, damn, this is there.
[21:42]
Speaker E
Do they up?
[21:43]
Speaker C
Yeah, a lot of stuff. And then now she doesn't shop in, like, the toddler. Well, like the big kid. Yeah. There's like a separate. You can tell the separation between, like, the bigger.
[21:52]
Speaker E
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then Lux's little boy, like, little kid. And then Lincoln's big kid.
[21:57]
Speaker C
Like, I know the brand that she likes now is the art class brand. And that's like, for the bigger girls. Like, she loves that section. It's more trendy.
[22:03]
Speaker E
Okay.
[22:05]
Speaker C
It's very 2000s too. Like, she loves that. Yeah, they have like. They had like an NSYNC shirt there the other day and everything.
[22:10]
Speaker E
Yeah, for her. Please tell me you got it for her.
[22:12]
Speaker C
No, I didn't. Because she doesn't. She doesn't know. She doesn't like boy bands or like, things like that. She likes Doja Cat and like, Billie Eilish. Billie Eilish. And like, she likes. She likes a lot of solo artists. She's not like a girl band, boy band type of girl. But I'm like, okay, whatever.
[22:27]
Speaker E
It's not really any of them now for them to like, you know what I mean?
[22:30]
Speaker C
That's what I was thinking. I'm like, we loved it and we knew what it was.
[22:34]
Speaker E
O Town, NSync, 98 Degrees, Backstreet Boys. Like, we had the whole nine. Yeah, they don't have that.
[22:41]
Speaker C
Really. No. I think she just finds it cheesy.
[22:43]
Speaker E
What's the last one? That there was like, One Direction.
[22:45]
Speaker C
Yeah. No. Yeah, you're right. And now they're all like Harry Styles and everything he was in.
[22:50]
Speaker E
Is there any other boy bands right now?
[22:52]
Speaker C
I don't think so. And besides those, like, K pop bands and stuff, But I don't listen to them.
[22:57]
Speaker E
They're always on my tv, but my kids don't really listen to them.
[22:59]
Speaker C
Yeah, she's not really like a girl band, boy band type of girl. And I was like, do you want this in sing shirt? And then she was like, I'm so.
[23:06]
Speaker E
Don't have any girls because I saw this Lisa Frank backpack. Like, a little backpack that you could, like, send them to school with.
[23:13]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[23:13]
Speaker E
And I commented, I, like, literally thought about buying it just in the event that I do have a girl one day.
[23:18]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[23:19]
Speaker E
Like, I literally was like, I need this bag. Like, I need it.
[23:23]
Speaker C
I'm trying to get her the Crocs, but every. When I went on, they're always sold out. They're always sold out. And I want. She wants them so bad. And I'm like, I want to get it. So I'm still on the lookout.
[23:32]
Speaker E
Well, if anyone knows where we can get her.
[23:34]
Speaker C
Yes. I love. And they come with the cute. The charms and everything. But, no, having a girl is so much fun. I just loved, like, the. I guess, like, the stage she's at now. She's become, like, she has more of her own style, like, her personality. So it's so cute. Like, she'll just dress herself. And I'm like, that's fucking cute, Bibi. Like, I'm like, oh, my God. Yeah, she's got, like, a really cute style. And I'm like, like, today she went to school with, like, a colorful, like, choker. And she, like, loves dressing her and, like, her little platform. Like, her black and white platform sneakers and stuff. Like, she. I'm like, you gotta be, like, the trendiest little girl in school because, like, she just looks so cute. But I love it. I like the. Where we shop at. Target is, like, my favorite. And even I'm, you know, I'm small, so, like, yeah, sometimes I'll get shirts from there. I'll just get, like, an extra large.
[24:20]
Speaker E
Yeah. Yeah.
[24:20]
Speaker C
And it fits me.
[24:21]
Speaker E
Oh, my gosh.
[24:22]
Speaker C
They have the cutest. They do. Like, I'm like, this is shit that I would wear.
[24:26]
Speaker E
Literally.
[24:26]
Speaker C
So I'm like, if I want a mantra, I'm like, I'm gonna. And it's cheaper for me.
[24:32]
Speaker E
Into the extra, extra large.
[24:33]
Speaker C
I literally was like, I'm about to just start doing this. I've never done it before, but I'm like, this is smart for me. Like, if I like something.
[24:39]
Speaker E
But that's cute for you guys to match exactly.
[24:41]
Speaker C
So I was like, this makes a lot of sense.
[24:43]
Speaker E
I love that.
[24:44]
Speaker C
It's so funny. I don't know about you, but it's.
[24:47]
Speaker E
Been like, a whirlwind.
[24:48]
Speaker C
Like, what, were you out and about doing things Wednesday? Because I was like, we were home all day. Like, I couldn't even. I was so tired. The day after the event, I was exhausted.
[24:57]
Speaker E
I had to record for coffee combos. And Tony was here, and I had to go with my kids and do all the running around. And they had. Lincoln had a basketball game. When I tell you that I'm looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow, like, you have no.
[25:08]
Speaker C
Oh, yeah, I bet. No, we took that whole Wednesday and we were, like, literally, like potatoes just lying on the couch all day watching the Hills like we did. We've been watching the Hills all week, honestly. And that's fucking crazy. I never watched it. I always used to watch Laguna Beach. You never watched the Hills, and now I'm watching it.
[25:24]
Speaker E
What you did? What episode are you on?
[25:27]
Speaker C
I just started season four.
[25:29]
Speaker E
Oh, my God.
[25:29]
Speaker C
I love when she tells Heidi. She's like, I can. I'm gonna forgive you, but I want to forget you or something like that. And I was like, this is iconic. Alessandra's like, this is, like, the iconic scene. But I was like, I never watched the Hill. And I was like, yeah. And I was like, this is so funny, because I know she was telling me that, like, Heidi and Spencer had to move to Costa Rica or something because everyone hated them.
[25:49]
Speaker E
They also filed. I believe they filed bankruptcy because of their crystal addiction when the world was going to end in 2012.
[25:55]
Speaker C
That's so crazy. Yeah. He talked. I know. She told me that he talked about how many, like, he's in debt and, like, he. All his money.
[26:01]
Speaker E
At one point, it was, like, all on crystals because the world was going to end. And now he has a crystal business and they're still married. They just had their second baby.
[26:07]
Speaker C
I know, it's. But it's so bizarre to me to see their relationship because I couldn't. I wanted her to break up with him so bad. I couldn't stand him. Like, I hated him. And I was like, I'm happy they're happy now. But I was like, but this was, like. This was crazy. I felt like he, like, made her leave all her friend.
[26:20]
Speaker E
Like, she was so, like, isolated her.
[26:22]
Speaker C
He was, like, in a little bubble with her, and I felt. Felt so bad.
[26:25]
Speaker E
But do you think that was the edit or do you think that was like.
[26:28]
Speaker C
There was a lot of things that I said that I was like, I can. I feel like a lot of this was edited, but he did give me that vibe that it was like, he didn't see her as, like, a person. He saw her as, like, an object. Like, he just wanted. Yeah, like, he just really wanted the way he, like, kept, like, pushed her away from Lauren and then, like, all her other Friends and stuff. Like, it was like he just wanted her for himself. And she was at, like, this was at the time where they were all like, like, popping. Like, they were like the it girls. You know what I mean? So I feel like he kind of really wanted to, like, bag her and just, like, have her before she went and, like, you know, did anything else or, like, forgot about him. Yeah, I honestly feel like that, like, that's how I felt. Like, I don't know them personally, but well. And it's funny because watching back, like, I never, Like, I. What was she on? She was on Laguna beach, right?
[27:16]
Speaker E
No, Heidi wasn't.
[27:17]
Speaker C
Heidi wasn't? No, it was Lauren and Kristen. Kristen, yeah. That's who. Okay. And it's like, a lot of the times where we made these. Some scenes out or, like, people to be the bad guys. You look back and you're like, well, it wasn't all that bad. Like, you're.
[27:31]
Speaker E
That's what I was just about to say. Like, now that.
[27:32]
Speaker C
So dramatized.
[27:34]
Speaker E
Now that you say that, I want to go back and watch it because obviously I had those opinions back when I watched it.
[27:39]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[27:40]
Speaker E
But I haven't seen it in 10 years, so, like, I wonder what I would think now, because I really didn't like Kristen back then. I was like, I stand for. Yeah, loved her.
[27:50]
Speaker C
And then now I watched Lauren, and I'm like, she's a little snotty sometimes, and she's a little, like. Well, a little out of touch. Like, she was a lot out of touch with a lot of things. And I was, like, this privileged. Like, I was, like, a lot of my feelings changed, like, as I'm older, and I was like, that's so crazy, because I was like, ride or die Lauren. Yeah. I'm like, well, you know, but like.
[28:06]
Speaker E
Now on social media, I follow Lauren. And I mean, I follow Kristen, not Lauren.
[28:10]
Speaker C
Oh, really? I follow. I think I follow both of them.
[28:11]
Speaker E
But. But, like, Lauren's very, like, blogger lifestyle.
[28:14]
Speaker C
Yeah, like. Like, yeah, very, like, girl next door still, like, she's still very much, like.
[28:20]
Speaker E
On my level where, like, I think Kristen is, like, more understanding and, like, more versatile.
[28:25]
Speaker C
Yeah, definitely dope. I like her.
[28:27]
Speaker E
She has that brand Uncommon James. Actually, I think they both have. Kristen did have a podcast. I don't know where it is now, but she, like, has a lot of books, cookbooks, everything.
[28:36]
Speaker C
And then Lauren had it's the Back to the. To the Beach.
[28:40]
Speaker E
Now she has that. I think she had one before that, but now she has the Back to the Beach. Almost Stephen.
[28:44]
Speaker C
Yeah. And it's really. It does.
[28:46]
Speaker E
I had Andrina from the Hills on Barely Famous, and I love her, so.
[28:50]
Speaker C
I always said she was.
[28:51]
Speaker E
She was my favorite.
[28:52]
Speaker C
Always been my favorite. No matter what I rewatch, she's still my favorite. I love her. I feel like. And you know who else I liked? Whitney. I love Whitney.
[28:59]
Speaker E
Oh, my God.
[29:00]
Speaker C
I was like. And I told Alessandra, I said, I. I mean, don't get me wrong. I like lc, but I feel like Whitney should have been the it girl. Like, she was so. She was awesome. I remember that. Yeah.
[29:09]
Speaker E
Hold on, let me look her up.
[29:10]
Speaker C
That's all.
[29:11]
Speaker E
Have Instagram Whitney.
[29:13]
Speaker C
I don't know. But I was like, I love her. Like, I loved her vibe. I loved her style. I loved her attitude. She was such a boss. Like, I was like, I like her. And I told this Trump, like, Elsie doesn't give. Like, I don't know why she became such a huge deal, because I didn't get any personality from her. Like, it wasn't someone that I was like, oh, my God. Like, I. I don't know. Like, now, back then, I guess we were, like, obsessed for no reason. But now I'm looking back, I was watching everything, and I'm like, Elsie's a little blah. Like, I have much personality. Like, no, Like, I really loved Audrey and I love Whitney. So I was like, it's just weird to, like, watch back and just like, have your opinion changed? And be like, wow. Like, this is kind of. She just really wasn't my vibe.
[29:51]
Speaker E
Whitney is a designer, and she has a brand called Cozy Co. Oh, it's like a life. It looks like some. Some comfort.
[30:01]
Speaker C
She was. I remember this. I'm at the. I'm at the episode where she left. Just left Teen Vogue, and she start. She wanted to start styling more. So I was like, good for her.
[30:10]
Speaker E
She has brown hair now. Oh, wow.
[30:12]
Speaker C
But, yeah, I love winning. I kept saying. I was like, when he should have been the it girl.
[30:15]
Speaker E
Well, they give her her own show. I don't think it did well.
[30:18]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[30:19]
Speaker E
I saw another tick tock that was like, I'm gonna give MTV some ideas for shows that they could play. We're so sick of ridiculousness.
[30:27]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[30:28]
Speaker E
And then it was like, the Hills, Laguna beach, parental control.
[30:31]
Speaker C
Like, bring those back.
[30:32]
Speaker E
Bring them all back. Because. But I think. I do think that Rob owns, like, a big portion of mtv. I'm sure it's like, he has his hand in everything, and so. And also, MTV doesn't have any other shows to replace Them. But like, if you're bringing back. If you're playing ridiculousness all the time, why not like, those are all reruns, so why not like, why not rerun like things like Laguna beach and stuff like that?
[30:55]
Speaker C
Yeah, they rebooted the Hills too. I think Alessandra told me like they did briefly.
[30:59]
Speaker E
Yeah. But I don't think it went anywhere.
[31:01]
Speaker C
Crazy. It's so creepy to me.
[31:03]
Speaker E
The creator of that show is also the creator of Selling Sunset.
[31:06]
Speaker C
I know Kristen Quinn like went off and a lot of the things that the girls said about him, she said the same thing. She kind of.
[31:13]
Speaker E
Is she not on that show anymore?
[31:15]
Speaker C
Christina? No, she's not. She's not coming back to Selling Sunset. She left of a group, she's not with them anymore. Her and her husband started this other thing, like crypto. And I don't know, it's like crazy.
[31:26]
Speaker E
Really?
[31:26]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[31:27]
Speaker E
I mean, I wonder if it. I guess you don't. She doesn't need the money. That's for one. But two, husband is like the creator.
[31:34]
Speaker C
Of like Grubhub or something.
[31:36]
Speaker E
Yeah. But I think he sold all of his shares. So like what do you do? I guess you invest the money and then you still have income. Let me go creep on her.
[31:43]
Speaker C
It's so bad.
[31:44]
Speaker E
I feel like I live under a rock I haven't checked up on forever.
[31:47]
Speaker C
But like, no, but that's where I've been.
[31:49]
Speaker E
It's so fascinating. Like to me. She's like an Alex Earl to me. Like, people love to hate them so bad and it's just like. But why? Because they're like, they're fascinating to me. Both of them.
[32:01]
Speaker C
I don't really know much about Alex Earl, but I definitely. Kristen Quinn is fascinating to me. She's just on another followers on another level. Like, you just can never. You could. You can never figure them out.
[32:19]
Speaker F
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[33:57]
Speaker E
If we didn't talk about Skims.
[33:59]
Speaker F
So let's talk about Skims. I'm obsessed. As someone who hated wearing bras, I still don't really love it. But if I'm gonna wear a bra, I love Skims bras, right? And let's talk about it. Because Skims have the Fits Everybody T shirt bra. And I love that one. I have several different colors of them. The Fits Everybody T shirt bra from Skims is the best bra that I've ever owned. And as a mom, my boobs have changed so much over the years. I was just talking about that, about the jeans, but it's true for every part of my body. This bra gives these curls a great lift and keeps them in place no matter what. And if you guys saw the picture of me on a red carpet, I'll post it on the baby mama's Instagram. I had a black sheer shirt on with a skims bra underneath. I'll post the picture like I said, but I'm absolutely obsessed. It just keeps them in place no matter what I'm doing throughout the day. Promise you it's a game changer. Ask Kristen. You know, if Kristen will vouch for it. You know it's legit and she was there when I got ready. So shoptheSkims bra@skims.com now available in 62 sizes. Are you kidding me? 30A to 46H and if you haven't yet. Be sure to let them know that we sent you after you place your order. So select podcast in the survey and select our show in the drop down menu that follows. We love skims.
[35:15]
Speaker C
Oh, yeah.
[35:16]
Speaker E
Oh, wow. She sells. She does like the Kardashian closet type vibe, but for her own closet.
[35:21]
Speaker C
Who?
[35:21]
Speaker E
Christine Quinn?
[35:22]
Speaker C
Oh, yeah.
[35:23]
Speaker E
Like, she resells like the items from her closet. She's fascinated.
[35:26]
Speaker C
Yeah. Because she probably doesn't. I don't see her as being like an alpha repeater. I feel like she buys clothes and then she'll just wear them to an event and then. I do not. I do not. That girl always has new fits. Like new. So she. That's good for her. She'll probably just wear it and then she'll just like.
[35:40]
Speaker E
Do you think the Kardashians repeat outfits?
[35:43]
Speaker C
Yeah, I feel like Kim definitely as now that they're moms too, I feel like definitely you do. Like I did be at home like repeating outfits. Yeah. Probably not to like, events. What? I mean, for sure they're not going to be doing.
[35:55]
Speaker E
I don't think I would repeat an outfit for.
[35:57]
Speaker C
Yeah. So like, if you were something to like a. The like for example, the Grammys or something, you're not going to wear that again. I feel like that gown. So why not just sell it or, you know, like everyday outfits.
[36:07]
Speaker E
You think they.
[36:08]
Speaker C
Everyday outfits. I think they. Yeah. Kim's always wearing skims. So like, she probably has just like multiple skim.
[36:13]
Speaker E
I saw something about her closet and she has like each set on a. Like it's all coordinated.
[36:19]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[36:19]
Speaker E
I'm like, I need that for my kids because it would help everybody out so much, so easy. But nobody wants to do like, do that once, like things are washed and like to put them away because you know how people live out of their like laundry baskets and like that. And it's like, I can't do that. It's. But then also, do we want to spend time hanging up all the sets?
[36:38]
Speaker C
Why don't you get, you know those little things that you can hang in the closets that people use as like shoe bins that they put their shoes in the hang.
[36:44]
Speaker E
Yes, you can.
[36:45]
Speaker C
I've seen someone do where they label like Monday, Tuesday.
[36:47]
Speaker E
Oh, I saw that. Look, look.
[36:48]
Speaker C
And then you just put the outfits in bin so that throughout the week the kids can grab them and just dress themselves and they'll have everything in that bin for them.
[36:56]
Speaker E
Yeah. Because.
[36:57]
Speaker C
Oh, and that's so much easier.
[36:58]
Speaker E
I meant to go to my friend Emily. She had. I Sent her a tick tock. I was like, can you make me these labels with your cricut? It was like acrylic bins. It was like Monday through Friday. Because Lux loves to dress himself. And I love that he can dress himself, but sometimes he comes down with the craziest outfits. Or, like, he'll want to wear Lincoln shoes. No, I love you so much. But, like, the one day I did let him wear Lincoln shoes to school because I was like, this is a battle I'm not doing.
[37:25]
Speaker F
Yeah, I'm not gonna do it.
[37:27]
Speaker E
When I tell you that Chris chewed my ass out. Like, flipped out that those were shoes were too big. But I'm like, literally, I just didn't.
[37:35]
Speaker C
Want to fight with this, like, little kid in the morning.
[37:38]
Speaker E
I didn't want to fight. He hasn't done it since, thankfully. But, like, I just. Just. Sometimes you have to choose your battles.
[37:44]
Speaker C
Very true. That's.
[37:46]
Speaker E
You know what I mean?
[37:46]
Speaker C
I also saw something and I thought, I want to start doing this because Viv can. She's the type that can go through snacks, like, all day. She can have a snack every hour, on the freaking hour.
[37:57]
Speaker E
Yes.
[37:57]
Speaker C
And I'm like, this is like, stop. Like, you don't need a snack every single time that you feel something. They think, yeah. So I saw this mom, and she just has, like, she leaves out bins and it's like three or four snacks. Like, it'll be like a fruit and like, like two or three other things. And those are the only things for the day that they can have for snacks. So they have to spice. They have to space it out themselves. Like, they have to learn, like, okay, this is all you're gonna eat at that snack. And I feel like I have to do that because, baby, I guess because I don't have. I guess not structure. But I'm not like, telling her, like.
[38:27]
Speaker E
Times and what she can.
[38:28]
Speaker C
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[38:29]
Speaker E
But at least it's like you could give her control by letting her pick what three snacks she's gonna have. And then here, whenever you're hungry, here they are. And you picked them. But once they're gone, they're gone.
[38:40]
Speaker C
Exactly. Knowing that once they're gone, that's it. That's the end of your snack adventures today. Because she won't go till like 9 o'clock at night, like, right before bed, asking me for a snack. And I'm like, no, this is not normal. And like, I try, like, she loves fruit and stuff like that, which is good. But yeah, I'm like, I'm just. It's every single day, like on the hour, and I'm like, girl, you need to relax. So I think I'm just gonna start that and see how it. How it works.
[39:02]
Speaker E
I got this. I posted on my story. You might have seen it. This, like, little. It probably wouldn't. It might work for VB like in the car.
[39:08]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[39:09]
Speaker E
Well, you don't let your kids eat in the car.
[39:11]
Speaker C
Yeah. Not like, not like messy things, you know, like if she has like a lollipop that I know she's just gonna keep in her mouth and eat whatever. But for the most part, I think they now they know, like, take your wrappers and take them the side.
[39:23]
Speaker E
So.
[39:24]
Speaker C
Because I don't play. I hate having stuff in my. Oh, I saw you post that. That is so cute.
[39:30]
Speaker E
So it was. It works really well.
[39:31]
Speaker C
Did you get that on Amazon?
[39:32]
Speaker E
Yeah.
[39:33]
Speaker C
Oh, I want to get that like right now. That is so cool. Yeah. Because maybe like she likes. Exactly. Everywhere we go, she wants to have a snack too.
[39:39]
Speaker E
I'll send you a link. So that works for Creed because Creed loves. Yeah, I'm a snacker too. I'd rather, you know, just like graze throughout the day. Yes.
[39:47]
Speaker C
That's how I am.
[39:48]
Speaker E
Dinner.
[39:49]
Speaker C
That's exactly how I am.
[39:50]
Speaker E
And then dinner. That's.
[39:51]
Speaker C
Yup. Like dinner is like my biggest meal.
[39:53]
Speaker E
Dinner, like dinner foods. I'm not a big breakfast person.
[39:56]
Speaker C
Me either.
[39:57]
Speaker E
I just am not super fan of breakfast foods. I'm really weird about lunch. But dinner is like, I love.
[40:02]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[40:02]
Speaker E
Give me the green beans, the rice, the pork, the chicken.
[40:05]
Speaker C
Like I want something.
[40:07]
Speaker E
Yeah. Like good home cooked meal. Yeah. I'm going to send you this link so you can get them. They have different colors and they come with stickers. You can put your name on them.
[40:16]
Speaker C
That is so cute. We're going to link it for you guys too.
[40:18]
Speaker E
Yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll link it for you.
[40:20]
Speaker C
Oh my gosh. Remember, I think it was like a couple weeks ago. I think we sent it in the BMND text or something. That step parent group. Do you remember that? Tick tock. Like it was like a step parent group and it was. I forgot what the exact. Hold on. Let me try and look at it. So it's. The group is called Step Kids can be Hell. Oh, do you remember that?
[40:46]
Speaker E
I didn't look at it. Tell me about it, dude.
[40:49]
Speaker C
So like there was a tick tock. And I guess there's a step parent group out there that says step kids can be. Can be hell. And everyone is Just posting like. Like. Like, literally talking about their step kids. And I'm like, how disrespectful and, like, disgusting is this? Like, there's a. Honestly, there's Facebook groups for, like, everything. But, like, you don't need to be in a Facebook group, like, trashing, honestly, someone that's not even your. Your kid. Like, I.
[41:10]
Speaker E
Like, I'm not a stepmom, and maybe this is an unpopular opinion. If you don't like your step kid, you don't need to be with the parents.
[41:20]
Speaker C
No facts. Like, it's just so weird. And it's one of those things that's like, I feel like Facebook groups go too far. Like, people just have, like, this. Like, they just vent and like, they Sometimes Reddit.
[41:30]
Speaker E
Reddit forums go.
[41:32]
Speaker C
You don't need to be talking to random strangers about this.
[41:34]
Speaker E
Like, like, you could get therapists.
[41:36]
Speaker C
Yeah, you need a therapist. Like, you really need a therapist. Or you need to talk to your partner. Or you need, like, figure this out. Because, like, y'all, some. Some of these comments that I saw in there were disgusting. And I'm like, you're talking about children. Like, like, literally, it's not their. It's not even your fault, but it's not their fault.
[41:51]
Speaker E
It's their parents fault. Because whatever is. Whatever. Their. Your children can only do so much.
[41:56]
Speaker C
And I get like, you know how sometimes me and you were like, oh, these kids are. Or like, whatever. Like, whatever. Like we say like that, but they're, like, in depth. Like, oh, like, she's a cunt. Like, she did this, like, airing out, like, stuff that they do. Like, really talking about them. Like, if there were another adult, like, talking. You know what I mean? So I was like, this is insane. And it just made me so mad because I was like, there are Facebook groups out there. Like, people are way too comfortable talking to strangers, number one about their problems. And I'm like, don't vent to a Facebook group about. Honestly, I don't feel like you should be venting about, like, your family, your husband, like, things like that. And I get it. Like, sometimes it feels like a family and things like that.
[42:30]
Speaker E
Well, if it's anonymous, yeah, to a degree.
[42:33]
Speaker C
To a degree. But I feel like those are things, like, not that you don't need to be welcoming that into. Like, because then other people's opinions and stuff can also affect things like that too. Like, what are people. But what if people are, like, egging her on? Like, yeah, like, fuck, your. Your. Your step kid. You should do this to him. Or Something like, there's some sick ass people out there. You know what I mean?
[42:51]
Speaker E
I just don't. For me, I don't think I could be with someone if they didn't like my kid.
[42:54]
Speaker C
No, I wouldn't. I couldn't. If I knew like some. If I was with someone and they didn't like BB or something, like, there's no chance. Why are you with me? Number one, like, my child is my.
[43:04]
Speaker E
Life and that child is half of me.
[43:06]
Speaker C
And I wouldn't feel comfortable either. Like, I don't get. I wouldn't.
[43:10]
Speaker E
But like to talk shit to that degree instead of helping the child. Like, you need to channel your energy into like whatever it is that's pissing you off. You need to have a family meeting and work it out. And you know, if the child is doing something that really is concerning, get them help.
[43:24]
Speaker C
Yeah, it's like all of these things can be talked about and like help. You know what I mean? But it's like they want to about it. And I, it's like those things that I guess, like, like, I get it, everyone goes through things. Like step parents have things that they feel like maybe they can't express to other people. Biological mothers, we have go through those things too, for sure. But I just don't like the, like the. If at that point it feels like a gang. Like, it feels like ganging up on a child. Like bullies. Like you're bullying children. These children.
[43:54]
Speaker E
But there's a lot of step kids are. Hell yeah. The group can be hell yeah. I, I typed in step kids and that was the first one that came up.
[44:03]
Speaker C
Yeah. And there's like a thousand members on there.
[44:05]
Speaker E
That's disgusting, people.
[44:08]
Speaker C
Yeah. Just like you're creating an environment that's like not gonna. And then it's funny because like the rules are like, be kind and courteous and like, you know, respect everyone's privacy, like stuff. But it's like they're doing the complete opposite and they're like, what?
[44:21]
Speaker E
But I'm gonna go on there and talk about my step kid.
[44:25]
Speaker C
Yeah. Someone said my step stepson. And then they put nine. He'd be talking so much he got skid stains on his chin. Like literally just talking shit about these kids. Like, it's literally disgusting. And then everyone is just going on and like, you know, like, they'll, they'll state their own opinions and stuff. And I'm like, yeah, but I was livid, I tell you. When I saw those groups and I was like, I, I remember. I don't Like. Like, I like our baby mama Facebook group, but other than that, I don't. I don't have groups. Like, I don't join anything that's like, yeah, like, people are really vile. They get vile in there. Like, and it's like, people have no, like, filter.
[45:02]
Speaker E
No respect. No. That's so sad. It was really sad company, though.
[45:07]
Speaker C
That's what I feel like it is in that thing in that group. Like, it's like they're all just miserable with, like, their step kids or their. Or like, their relationship, and it's like, well, then this. This doesn't need to be discussed in a Facebook group, you know?
[45:19]
Speaker E
Like, that needs to be your husband, your wife.
[45:22]
Speaker C
Exactly. Like, and me. And I'm like, could you imagine if, like, I was in a group like that and, like, I found out or you or Joe found out? Like, imagine if the other person. Like, if your husband or someone finds out you're in a group group talking shit about their child. Like, bro, I would fight you. Like, I would literally, I would talk about my child.
[45:38]
Speaker E
Their own names. Like, their real names.
[45:40]
Speaker C
Yeah, because, yeah, groups show your names. If you're posting something, you can post anonymously. You can, like, have it so that your name isn't there. But most of the time, if you post something, if your name is, your profile is attached to that. You know what I mean? So that's insane. It was, like, so bizarre to me.
[45:55]
Speaker E
I can't. So, anyone that's listening to this podcast, I don't want you to be a supporter of this podcast. If you're in a group like that, that.
[46:01]
Speaker C
No, if you're in that group, like.
[46:03]
Speaker E
Don'T even listen to.
[46:05]
Speaker C
Listen.
[46:05]
Speaker E
I don't want your view. Like, if you're in a group like that. I don't even have step kids. And I do. If you're making fun of kids, I do not want you.
[46:12]
Speaker C
So it takes. Takes it to a whole another level. Like, that's. You're. You're literally talking about a child. Like, it's just. There's no other way to put it.
[46:21]
Speaker E
That's horrible.
[46:21]
Speaker C
It's immature. It's disgusting. Like, you need help. Like, I think that's, like, that calls for, like, something deeper than a Facebook group. And, like, you don't know any of these people, you know? Like, it's.
[46:33]
Speaker E
And it's just not worth it. You know what I mean? Like, it's not. And does it make you feel better? No, it probably, like, feels what I'm saying. Like, hate that you have inside Feel.
[46:41]
Speaker C
Better posting those things after?
[46:43]
Speaker E
No, they. Because they're getting dopamine hits. Every time someone agrees with them or commiserates with them, they're getting dopamine hits from that. You're sick. You need help. If that is what gives you a dopamine hit, you are sick. Yeah, like, go take a walk in the sunshine.
[46:57]
Speaker C
Yeah, I hope.
[46:58]
Speaker E
Get your serotonin going. Get some dopamine going. Take your dog for a walk.
[47:02]
Speaker C
Take a dog for a walk. No, but there are some really crazy Facebook groups out there. Like really crazy. And I'm like, I can't even believe. And they'll be having like thousands of members and stuff. I'm like, I can't even think of one person that would join this Facebook group. But here they are with like thousands of people in them. Like, that's insane to me. If I found out someone that I knew was in that group, I would like, probably not want to be their friend ever again either.
[47:26]
Speaker E
Okay. So I found this. Actually someone tagged me in this on Facebook. Actually, I don't. That's why I don't know if they tagged you.
[47:34]
Speaker C
That's a lie.
[47:34]
Speaker E
I don't know if I came across it on my own or it was tagged. I don't know. But this is in a moms and mama's group and it says I need to vent because I'm hurt. I still cry when I think about it. My husband has apologized, but now I understand why he's been so stingy to me all these years. I'm not a big fan of sex. Sex. I'm fine with it once a week or two, but my husband enjoys having sex as many times a week as he can. We even trying new things out in bed, which irks me. I try to meet him halfway and sometimes I give in. My husband has a great job, but he never gives me money. I'm a stay at home mom and I haven't complained a lot. But he says I'm helping us invest. I'm helping us invest it or I'm saving it for the future. He would sometimes give me $20 for the month. Month A month of recent. I have been really touched out and haven't given him given into him having sex. It's been a month and we even fought over it. I asked him for money yesterday and his response to me was no sex, no money. I couldn't believe it. I still can't. He has apologized to me so many times, but I can't help but to think this has been his thought all these years, I am mortified and I'm at a loss for what to do.
[48:43]
Speaker C
That is crazy. No sex, no money. He look, he doesn't. He doesn't even look at you as like a. A person. This goes back to like, object. Yeah, you're an object to him.
[49:02]
Speaker F
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[50:29]
Speaker E
You know what?
[50:30]
Speaker F
I don't miss at all. And I'm going to share that with you right now. The vicious week before your period. And actually, I'm on that week right now. Funny story, I was in Target today with Creed and he asked me, why do mommies bleed out of their butt? But that's a. That's a conversation for a different day. But I do want to talk about period. So it was sort of relevant. I hate when my skin breaks out. I'm covered in pimples. The cravings. Why don't we talk about this more than we do. I really feel like we could all have a conversation, but. But I could truly have eaten my.
[50:59]
Speaker E
Own hand this week. I swear.
[51:00]
Speaker F
Now, it's easier to manage PMS with Estro control, okay? Because Estro controls a formula developed by Happy Mammoth. It's a supplement company dedicated to making women's lives easier. So if you're listening to Baby Mamas, you're most likely a woman. And if you're not a woman, get this for your partner, your wife, your girlfriend, whatever. Estro control contains science backed herbal extracts that help support hormonal health, especially in women who suffer from pms. PMS like me. And the way that Estro control eases PMS is actually interesting. So the ingredients help support the liver and that's where our hormones get processed, especially estrogen. So when the estrogen isn't processed well in the liver, women may start having pms. Spots on the skin get cravings and feel low all of a sudden. Estro control is made specifically for women who are pre menopausal, so it's perfect for women that haven't entered menopause yet. In fact, it's amazing for perimenopause when hormones start to fluctuate and PMS can turn into an absolute beast. So for a limited time, you guys can get 15 off your entire first order@happy mammoth.com. just use code Baby mama at checkout.
[52:12]
Speaker E
Oh, I'm sorry, but I, and I understand like the stay at home thing, like I get it, but your wife is providing childcare, which is a full time job, so. But it's free like you are.
[52:31]
Speaker C
She's saving you money from what you're working because you don't have to pay for a damn daycare or anything.
[52:36]
Speaker E
An allowance. Yeah, a lack of better words is no, it shouldn't.
[52:41]
Speaker C
It should be my money is your money, babe. Like, here, take the. Give her a debit card.
[52:47]
Speaker E
I don't know what I would do if someone handed me 20 for the month. So it's like, what do you even do in a situation? I guess, like get on. Like it's hard too because it's like.
[52:58]
Speaker C
You can't tell someone to leave either because most of the time, like, obviously she doesn't even have a job to like have the funds to get out and get an apartment or anything. But that's abuse. He's literally used that's abuse. He's abusing you with, he's controlling you with money and that's what it is. And sex, like, that's abuse.
[53:13]
Speaker E
Abuse?
[53:14]
Speaker C
Yeah, that's abuse. And that's what I mean. Like, if it comes to that, you won't see my ass staying in that relationship because it's only going to get worse.
[53:21]
Speaker E
Oh, I would never. I wouldn't. You wouldn't care.
[53:23]
Speaker C
It's only gonna get worse.
[53:25]
Speaker E
I would go to a shelter, I think, because this is abuse.
[53:27]
Speaker C
It's abuse 100 control abuse. Where'd you say you find that at? That wasn't in our Facebook group, was it?
[53:32]
Speaker E
No, it's okay.
[53:32]
Speaker C
Because I was about to say, baby, please hit me up. Like, oh, my gosh.
[53:36]
Speaker E
I'll send it to Alex. I'll send it to Alessandra to post so that people can read it. But it was on. I think it was anonymous. But this is so sad. And I don't even know.
[53:45]
Speaker C
It pisses me off that men do that too, because it's like, you should be literally bowing down to women. Literally. Like, she is taking care of the home. She's taking care of probably your. She's probably washing all your dirty laundry, taking care of your kids, cooking. She probably makes sure you. She probably makes sure that every time you come home, you have a home cookie cooked hot meal because she doesn't.
[54:10]
Speaker E
Have money to order out. So she's got to be.
[54:12]
Speaker C
She's definitely cooking. That's exactly. So it's like, you sound so abusive and you sound so ignorant and ungrateful. That's what it is.
[54:20]
Speaker F
Horrible.
[54:21]
Speaker E
That is so horrible. I'm gonna. I'll send this to Alessandra, but I literally am sick to my stomach when I read that. It was like, I have to bring this up.
[54:27]
Speaker C
It makes me sick to my stomach. Like, excuse me. Y'all need to really start appreciating women for who the we are.
[54:33]
Speaker E
They don't.
[54:34]
Speaker C
Like, y'all really need to start because it's. It's becoming disgusting and it's funny. I actually saw something that someone posted on Facebook yester yesterday too. This is all coming, like, full circle. And someone said the guy, he was podcasting and he's like, men needs to start. Like, men don't respect women the way they used to. Like, they need to start respecting women. They're like. And they're. And he said. He also said he's like, men are not as obsessed with women or, like, as I saw as they used to do. You know what? I think you probably follow who. I follow that. Like, you probably saw it. But he's like, we should be obsessed with our women. Like, we should be treating Them like queens. Like we should be.
[55:06]
Speaker E
Yes, I saw that. It was at a Tick Tock Talk.
[55:07]
Speaker C
Yes.
[55:08]
Speaker E
It was like, okay, I know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah. No, and I was like.
[55:11]
Speaker C
I was like, yeah, everyone should have a band that's, like, obsessed with her. Like, literally treat her like a queen. Like, he's like, what happened to these men? Like, they don't. Literally don't even. They're not grateful for, like, anything these women do for them.
[55:22]
Speaker E
No, I have to find it because I saw it and I was like, wow, like, that is such a good point.
[55:26]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[55:26]
Speaker E
Because.
[55:27]
Speaker C
Yeah. He said men aren't obsessed with women anymore. And it's weird. These men are more into themselves than they are women. They expect the woman to buy them flowers and chocolate. In their mind, they're the catch. And women should chase them. But that was never how it was intended to be.
[55:41]
Speaker E
Men are hunters and gatherers.
[55:42]
Speaker C
As men by nature, we are hunters. Women are the catch. We got to put the work in. And then he goes on to say, but these men are too self absorbed and they expect the woman to do everything.
[55:52]
Speaker E
Where is that? Let me see. I.
[55:55]
Speaker C
This guy.
[55:55]
Speaker E
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
[55:56]
Speaker C
Yeah. One of my friends, and I was like, he's so right. He's like. I'm like, he's. He's. He's right.
[56:02]
Speaker F
And I said another.
[56:03]
Speaker E
He said I liked one of his other tik toks that he sent too, or that he posted. Everyone wants a good woman until that good woman requires you to be a good man. And then he goes on to say.
[56:16]
Speaker C
Yeah, like, God forbid. Huh?
[56:19]
Speaker E
Men will claim they want a good woman, but when they get her, they don't know what to do with her. And so they just kind of like, let it fizzle out. But he says, hold on.
[56:27]
Speaker C
Y.
[56:27]
Speaker E
Some of these men want so much, but the energy isn't reciprocated. So they want you to be faithful. They want you to be a ride or die. They want you to cook, clean all day. Them. But they will not provide the same. When you. When it comes time for the mom to want to go to dinner with the girls, it's a no. But a man can just dip out and do whatever the.
[56:44]
Speaker C
Here's 20 for the month.
[56:45]
Speaker E
20 for the month? Yeah. Off.
[56:47]
Speaker C
You gotta be kidding me.
[56:48]
Speaker E
We should try to get him on the podcast.
[56:49]
Speaker C
Because we should. I like him.
[56:52]
Speaker E
And then when she questions you about your actions, you. You try gaslighting.
[56:56]
Speaker C
Oh, those are the. Those are the worst ones. Get away from those.
[56:59]
Speaker E
Don't do that ones.
[57:02]
Speaker C
No, it's. It's. It's bizarre. And I've noticed a lot. I mean, I see a lot of, you know, for people, even on social media and relationships, and I see, I. There's so many different types of relationships like that. And I'm like, women, do you guys just deserve so much better. Even in the Facebook group like this, going back to Facebook group, when people, like, talk about the stuff that they go through with their husbands and stuff like that. And I just. It takes so much energy for me to not be like, leave him, sis. Like, fucking leave him. Like, that's my energy all the time when I see those things. Because I'm like, you are worth so much more. You know, like, you can find someone that's truly obsessed with you, loves you, communicates with you, treats you with respect, loyal to you, you know, like, and.
[57:40]
Speaker E
If not, you're better off by yourself. Yes, you're better off. Do you know who Kita Rose is? She's a. She's another creator. And she was saying, I wrote it in here too, because it was one of the points. But she basically says that, like, when women. Some people hate when women beat the odds and overcome the adversity that they face. So in situations like that where I get a lot of for it, like, I leave men that if I'm not happy, I leave and I get a lot of for it. And I. A lot of them are like, oh, you're the problem. But it's like, no, there's so many. Yes, I have been a problem, but it's more like I'm not happy, so I'm not going to settle. And then I get for it because other people are stuck in their situations and then they hate me because I get out because I overcome the adversity. And she basically says that, like, people don't want to see other people in their same situations or similar situations or grow from the.
[58:35]
Speaker C
Especially if they come from the same place too.
[58:37]
Speaker E
Yeah. So I put in here. Keita Rose posted a comment. So Summer Walker had posted about her and her child.
[58:44]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[58:45]
Speaker E
And then someone commented and was like, Summer Walker enjoys being a single mother. A little bit too much for my liking.
[58:52]
Speaker C
I saw. I always see people talk about her too, and, like, how she likes being a single mom. And I'm like, Like, first of all, London on the track was trash. Like, he treated her like. So I'm glad she left him. Like, I'm not happy that her child, you know, has different homes. But it is. It probably is better. Yeah.
[59:08]
Speaker E
Because it's the same workload, but you're by yourself. You don't have to deal with the extra.
[59:11]
Speaker C
So does she have, like, twins now or something? Or she. Summer Walker. I could be wrong. Did she have twins? You know, Summer, you don't know. He's like, I don't know.
[59:22]
Speaker E
I be singing.
[59:23]
Speaker C
She had. She got pregnant again and she has. She had a huge belly size back. No, no, it was another guy.
[59:28]
Speaker E
Okay. So Kita goes on to say that people are so unhappy that seeing other happy, other people happy chaps their ass.
[59:34]
Speaker C
That's so true.
[59:35]
Speaker E
And she says when people are faced with adversity and they overcome the odds stacked against them, it pisses them off. And I said, I relate so hard to the statement because I feel like a huge portion of why I get trolled so hard and why the trolls hate me so much is because I have really come so many obstacles and people didn't want.
[59:49]
Speaker C
People expected you to state.
[59:50]
Speaker E
They wanted me to be down.
[59:52]
Speaker C
They wanted.
[59:52]
Speaker E
Wanted to stay there. But then it's like, same time when I was on welfare, the amount of that I got for talking about that on Team mom was like, I was abusing the system. No. I was in a place where I couldn't do it. I overcame that, and now y'all are still not happy with me. And so I just wanted to touch on that because I feel like that kind of goes. It's so true, everything we were talking.
[60:11]
Speaker C
About, but they'd rather you stay down and just stay there instead of bettering yourself and wanting better for yourself. Fighting. Yep. Exactly. Because they're like in the same place or, you know, they haven't grown. And it's selfish people. I think humans can be very selfish.
[60:27]
Speaker E
They're a lot of people are. I'm an. Sometimes.
[60:31]
Speaker C
Yeah. Do you want to. This goes into actually the. The listener topic that we have today. Did you see that?
[60:37]
Speaker E
No, I didn't. Go ahead and I'll pull it up.
[60:40]
Speaker C
Someone actually posted in the Facebook group. It was a text.
[60:45]
Speaker E
Our Facebook group?
[60:46]
Speaker C
Yeah. It was a text between her and her husband. And I guess. Guess so. I think she might have posted something or reposted something on Facebook. This is what I'm getting from it. And he sent it back to her. And the. The meme was it said, spoiling a woman doesn't always include money. It includes time, attention, being there emotionally, physically, and mentally. The money comes and goes by how you make her feel is forever.
[61:09]
Speaker E
That's true.
[61:10]
Speaker C
And he sent it to her and said, coming from the person who uses her husband as an emotional punching bag their entire relationship. And then she wrote back, wow, aren't we in a good mood? Have a. Have a great day. And he said, exactly. And then she wrote in the group, she said, how would you ladies feel? I haven't even responded again because I am sick to my stomach. Why would he marry me and have a child if he felt that way? He works a lot. Dates are boring when they happen. We have nothing to talk about. I have no libido at all. Not for him or myself. I have no desire to get off. I know where some of his behavior stems from. Because he wants sex all the time. Time. Selfish of me, maybe, but if I am tired and overstimulated, just leave me alone. He never asks why I'm sad or depressed, but will quickly act like a jerk when he isn't getting what he wants. I am stay at home mom. So everything is always taken care of for him. I was posting it because it's what I believe in. So yeah. Thoughts on that?
[62:07]
Speaker E
Okay. She's probably burnt out if she's a stay at home mom. If the dates are boring, when they finally do reconnect.
[62:17]
Speaker C
I feel like that's hard.
[62:18]
Speaker E
They're both at fault. Like they're both not at fault. There's. It's nobody's fault. Like that's just the circumstance.
[62:22]
Speaker C
This is where work. This is where work be put in to your relationship.
[62:26]
Speaker E
Because if he's working, he still needs to make her feel special. And then if you know, cooking and cleaning and all of that is not his love language. He's not seeing it that way. So he needs to show his appreciation. But also they need to figure out how to show each other their love in their own love languages.
[62:42]
Speaker C
Yeah. To get that part to make things.
[62:44]
Speaker E
Feel like they can get through this if they put the time and work into it.
[62:48]
Speaker C
Absolutely.
[62:48]
Speaker E
Because this is one of those things where it's like you're not always going to be in love in your relationship. Right. Like you're not always going to be wanting to have sex. You're choosing to love that person. And you might have a low libido right now, but if he starts showing you appreciation and you start showing him love in his own love language, in outside of being the stay at home mom, it might.
[63:08]
Speaker C
It'll work. I think it'll change.
[63:10]
Speaker E
That sucks because you.
[63:11]
Speaker C
But the work has to be.
[63:13]
Speaker E
And I think like speaking from experience, like sometimes when you're in it, you don't see it that way. And so, like, you're like, this is the end all, be all. I'm done. I don't want to do this. I don't even want to give him, like, show him the appreciation. But as someone from the outside who's been through this.
[63:27]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[63:27]
Speaker E
I want to scream and shake them and be like, you both can get through this. Like, this is nobody fault. He's working a lot. Your stay at home.
[63:34]
Speaker C
You guys are both seem just like, over.
[63:37]
Speaker E
You guys, both. You're burnt out. But they want the same things. He wants sex and love and attention and quality time. Probably physical touch. She probably does too.
[63:44]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[63:45]
Speaker E
But because she's overstimulated, she can't see past the overstimulation right now.
[63:49]
Speaker C
I feel like a lot of moms can relate to this because even I've been through this too. I feel like we've all been through this, where it's like, no, like, I just. I'm so overstimulated. Like, all the little things that I've been through today that you haven't seen is. Is getting to me.
[64:02]
Speaker E
Right.
[64:02]
Speaker C
And then want, you know, me to give it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's why communication is, like, key too. Like, learning how to speak to your partner and learning even the energy that they give you. Like, I feel like people need to start reading energy. Like, read the room, bro. Like, if you're, like, leaning in on me and I'm like, not really into it, like, you should be like, what's wrong, babe? Like, what. Where you know what's going on? How can I help you? Yeah. Like, that is. That's big dick energy. That's the energy that we need. Love that energy. But, like, literally, like, read. Sometimes I'm just like, people need to learn. If you learn how to read a room better, you might learn why. You know, you can talk to your wife or, like, you know, just talking, hearing her out, listen to her. Like, and then not just listen, but, like, act and, like, help the issue, you know? So it's.
[64:46]
Speaker E
It's.
[64:46]
Speaker C
It's wild to me. Like, I don't. I don't understand how men can't, like, see. Especially if you've been with someone for so long, you should get the vibe that they're having an opt.
[64:55]
Speaker E
Or maybe they're all, yes. And if that's the case, place maybe sacrifice your own sex drive that night and go get her flowers and chocolate.
[65:03]
Speaker C
And be like, hey, do something out of the regular.
[65:05]
Speaker E
You're struggling today. I appreciate everything you've done. Even if the house is a disaster when you get home because she just didn't have it in her. I appreciate what you're doing on a regular basis. Here's some flowers. Here's some candy. Or here, I brought home dinner so you don't have to worry about it. And then she's gonna be more like. Like, no. Probably not right away, if we're being. Being honest. Probably not right away. Yeah, you. But over time, showing appreciation will go a long way.
[65:29]
Speaker C
No abs. Absolutely.
[65:31]
Speaker E
And also not being so explosive and passive aggressive.
[65:36]
Speaker C
Yeah, I noticed that can be hard.
[65:37]
Speaker E
For the first time in my life, I have conversations with Elijah when things are like, in previous relationships, I would also be passive aggressive or passive. The silent treatment. Or I would be like, have an attitude and be real.
[65:53]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[65:53]
Speaker E
And just like an.
[65:55]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[65:55]
Speaker E
Now I'm like, hey, no, this is how I'm feeling. And like, if you wanna. If you. You can't even gaslight me now.
[66:02]
Speaker C
Like, if you tried, I'm telling you.
[66:04]
Speaker E
But if he did. Yeah. I would be like, oh, no, that's not. Like, don't try to turn this on me. Like, this is not where we're at. But I guess therapy has helped with that. I was saying on live Instagram yesterday, I'm like, only now three years in, am I truly seeing the effects of therapy.
[66:18]
Speaker C
That's amazing.
[66:19]
Speaker E
Like, the first year and a half was like unlearning so much.
[66:23]
Speaker C
Yeah. And the work and like just.
[66:24]
Speaker E
Yeah.
[66:25]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[66:25]
Speaker E
Only just now am I seeing it in myself.
[66:36]
Novo Nordisk Representative
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[66:47]
Speaker E
Taylor Swift.
[66:48]
Speaker C
Swift.
[66:48]
Novo Nordisk Representative
We're two sisters who make no apologies for our love of pop culture and the fact that a listers might mean more to us than each other. Join us on your favorite podcast app every Wednesday for pop apologists. Pop Apologists, your new favorite sister and celeb podcast.
[67:05]
Speaker D
Building a business may feel like a big jump, but on deck, small business loans can help keep you afloat. With lines of credit up to $100,000 and term loans up to 250,000, OnDeck lets you choose the loan that's right for your business. As a top rated online small business lender, Ondeck's team of loan advisors can help you find the right business loan to fit your needs. Visit ondeck.com for more information. Depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by Ondeck or Celtic Bank. Ondeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans and amounts subject to lender approval.
[67:38]
Speaker G
Hear that? It could be the sound of your phone dinging every time you sell a product with TikTok ads this holiday season. If you've ever thought about advertising your business on TikTok, now the time to do it. You can drive more customers to your website, sell products right in the app, and you can even use TikTok's creative tools to easily make content and find creators to help sell your products for you. But you have to start now. So head over to getstarted.TikTok.com holiday24 and drive more holiday sales today.
[68:14]
Speaker E
But let's read down in the DMS.
[68:17]
Speaker C
Yeah.
[68:20]
Speaker E
What?
[68:21]
Speaker C
Damn, it's going down in the DMs.
[68:27]
Speaker E
Hey girls, love y'all so much and y'all keep a going for real. Yeah, let me get into my Valentine's Day show. So I too am a baby mama. With that being said, that means I have one of those things that helped me procreate that we like to one.
[68:40]
Speaker C
Of those things.
[68:43]
Speaker E
Daddy. Anyway, we had been together on and off for six years and last Valentine's Day he came over and said he wanted to see our son to give him a small gift for Valentine's, which I should have known right then some was off because sir, you don't have a job. But I give him the benefit of the doubt and was like, cool, that's special for my baby. I'm not gonna block their bond, y'all. This man showed up with two dozen roses, a candle, my favorite chocolate. I nearly my pants. What was going on on? He was not the type of guy to buy me gifts and certainly not on a day like this. One thing led to another and those flowers and chocolate ended up my app ended up with me ass down, face up.
[69:21]
Speaker C
Oh, I thought she was gonna say ended up my ass. I'm like damn.
[69:24]
Speaker E
Completely wrong. What I meant to say I read that wrong.
[69:27]
Speaker C
Put the flowers up her ass. Happy Valentine's Day.
[69:31]
Speaker E
One thing led to another and those flowers and chocolate ended up with me ass up, face down down. I hadn't this man in six months because he was literally the town backstory. My sister makes chocolate covered strawberries and she had given me a box of them so he thought I bought them special for him. So I went with the flow because I didn't know that this was even going to happen or go there we were chilling in bed, hanging out with our baby when I get on Snapchat and he posted the strawberries on His Instagram saying, my girl got my favorites for me. First of all, baby, I'm not your girl. And second, don't be posting that because we live in the smallest town. Everyone is in everyone's business. They knew my sister sold those specific strawberries. And the math was definitely mathing.
[70:12]
Speaker C
Everyone's like, oh, these strawberries. I know this. Sell those strawberries. That means her baby daddy's at her house right now and he's feeding her those strawberries. Like what?
[70:20]
Speaker E
He ends up leaving. And I don't say anything because I didn't want to be a about it. But I was going to take what came from his post from the 865 other girls he was messing with. Y'all, I kid you not. This took a picture in my driveway of my house saying, who wants to go on a nice dinner date with me tonight? That escalated audacity. Needless to say, I was laying there in my robe, literally and figuratively. I didn't have my chocolate covered strawberries. And this done showed the whole town. He was at my house, but was also asking someone to go on a date with him that night. So here's the nerve. So here's some food for thought. When your baby daddy said he's coming over, just say no. Because somehow he didn't even bring the baby anything. Just brought me some food.
[71:00]
Speaker C
I was just about to say so he really didn't bring the baby anything. Poor kid though.
[71:05]
Speaker E
Those thing that you procreate. Those things that you procreate with the audacity. Actually found a to go with him on a date that night and they were eating my strawberries, man. I threw all the stuff he gave me outside and posted it to my Snapchat saying free for any his name is with. He was at my bedroom window begging me at 2am the next day. This is why I don't like baby daddies. Can't stand them.
[71:29]
Speaker C
Oh my God. That was like a. That was a lot. Lot. That's a lot. But like, don't him, sis. I'm just still mad he didn't get the baby anything.
[71:38]
Speaker E
Why didn't he get the baby nothing?
[71:39]
Speaker C
Get the baby nothing. That baby deserves some strawberries too. Maybe over there like mom and dad in the bedroom.
[71:49]
Speaker E
He like, I didn't get no candy, flowers, nothing.
[71:51]
Speaker C
I ain't get no chocolate.
[71:53]
Speaker E
These nothing though.
[71:57]
Speaker C
That is so funny. Well, thanks for that Valentine's story.
[72:00]
Speaker E
Yeah. Is there another one? Is this is the last one? So I have a story for you ladies. I asked. I had asked one Night stand or whatever you call it. With Genuine.
[72:09]
Speaker C
What?
[72:10]
Speaker E
What?
[72:10]
Speaker C
She had a one night stand with Genuine.
[72:12]
Speaker E
I had asked One night stand or whatever you call it, with Genuine.
[72:16]
Speaker C
Okay. Yeah.
[72:18]
Speaker E
Genuine. He was judging a talent show in a town near where I lived. A friend of mine worked at a radio station and knew I had a crush on him. Him. So he called to tell me Genuine was going to be in town. I should go see him. So I did. After the talent show, he was taking pictures in the VIP section. I went to take a picture with him and when I walked up to him, he said. I looked at him and said, I feel the same way about you, baby.
[72:41]
Speaker C
Oh my God.
[72:42]
Speaker E
He asked for my number and asked me to go back to his hotel with him. So I followed him to the hotel because Mama didn't raise no punk.
[72:48]
Speaker C
Get trying to ride that pony.
[72:55]
Speaker E
Get this. When we got to the hotel, there was a line of women waiting on him. I walked up to security guard and told him I wasn't waiting in line. I was first or I was going home. Because my ho ass has standards. Period.
[73:07]
Speaker F
Queen.
[73:08]
Speaker C
My whole ass.
[73:09]
Speaker E
My whole ass standard.
[73:11]
Speaker C
I love that. That should be on a shirt, period. That should be on a merch.
[73:14]
Speaker E
Fact. Anyways, dude told him what I said and he had the dude bring me up to his room. We talked a bit, had sex. And when I tell you this man was huge. This man was huge.
[73:25]
Speaker C
Genuine.
[73:25]
Speaker E
Genuine. Got that.
[73:27]
Speaker C
Got that pony.
[73:28]
Speaker E
I was not ready nor prepared for what I encountered. I kept running up the bed away from.
[73:33]
Speaker F
I could just picture her trying to get away.
[73:36]
Speaker C
You might like push yourself back a little bit. Like relax.
[73:40]
Speaker E
When we finished, I left and on the way home he called me asking to come back. But I was too scared and punked out. I made up a lie and went home. No.
[73:46]
Speaker C
Oh my God. No. Don't be scared.
[73:49]
Speaker E
Back and back and back. And now I'm having a baby by Genuine.
[73:51]
Speaker C
Right?
[73:52]
Speaker E
Period. Mama didn't raise no punk.
[73:54]
Speaker C
She said, no, I'm having a baby by Genuine.
[73:59]
Speaker E
Well, let me look up Genuine.
[74:01]
Speaker C
Thanks for. Thanks for letting us know about this. I love shout out to Genuine.
[74:05]
Speaker E
I was. I'm living for your through you.
[74:08]
Speaker C
We should. People should send us their like hook anyone if they hooked up with like celebrities or like D list celebrities or like someone who popped off. I know someone who actually she. She hooked up with a guy. Well, she was having like basically an affair with him and he had previously hooked up with Sza before she got.
[74:24]
Speaker E
She did a semester at dsu.
[74:26]
Speaker C
Yeah, she's like, from Jersey.
[74:28]
Speaker E
I think I love scissor, though.
[74:30]
Speaker C
I think. I'm not sure. I don't know how else he would have known her, but, like, yeah, he, like, hooked up to her and I'm like, I love Scissor, but I'm like, damn. I want to know more about that story.
[74:38]
Speaker E
I love that. Yeah.
[74:41]
Speaker C
I love her, but. Yeah, send us, like, any. I want to hear, like, hookup stories.
[74:45]
Speaker E
I need to hear hookup stories.
[74:46]
Speaker C
If you guys have any been with a celebrity or someone who's like, I don't know, like, anyone that might be interesting. Yeah, love that.
[74:54]
Speaker E
What would we call that one? Not down in the dms. We got to call it something else. Celebrity.
[75:00]
Speaker C
Down in the celebrity. What is it? D list. Down in the D lists.
[75:06]
Speaker E
Chicken. Down with the D list.
[75:07]
Speaker C
Dicking down with the D list.
[75:09]
Speaker E
Oh, my God. That's so funny.
[75:11]
Speaker F
Thank you, guys.
[75:11]
Speaker E
We love y'all. And you guys, keep y'all posted on the next live event.
[75:16]
Speaker C
Yeah. Thank you guys so much again, because it was a ball. We'll be doing it soon. We'll be doing it again. Bye, guys.
[75:37]
Speaker E
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[75:44]
Speaker F
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[75:45]
Speaker C
I love free. And I love Jersey Shore.
[75:48]
Speaker E
For me, it's the Godfather. SpongeBob SquarePants.
[75:51]
Speaker C
I am Patrick. Patrick is me.
[75:54]
Speaker E
Oh, Forrest Gump.
[75:55]
Speaker C
Come on. Criminal minds.
[75:57]
Speaker E
Solving crime after bedtime. Whatever you love to watch.
[76:00]
Speaker F
Pluto TV makes it easy with thousands.
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Speaker E
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[76:06]
Speaker C
Never. You know that feeling when you find great gifts at even better prices? You gotta go to Raw Ross. They've got deals on everyone's favorite gifts this holiday season where you can save 20 to 60% off other retailers prices like, come on. Your friend wants a sweater. You want savings? Go to Ross. You want savings on a comfy new bed for your dog, Ross. You find the cutest dog beds and dog toys. They even sell the brand name toys that kids actually want. And PJs for just about anyone. And all new oversized, comfy lounge sets for your favorite teens. And for the men, you can save big on dress shirts and puffer vests too. Don't forget everything you need to host for the holidays as well, like stemware, festive dishes, barware, and so much more. You can find holiday decor and festive barware for all your hosting. So what are you waiting for? Head on over to Ross near you and say big. This holiday season, you'll be glad you did because everyone is going to ask, where'd you get that? Save on all things Holiday at Ross yes, for less.
[77:07]
Speaker G
Hear that? It could be the sound of your phone dinging every time you sell a product with TikTok ads this holiday season. If you've ever thought about advertising your business on TikTok, now is the time to do it. You can drive more customers to your website, sell products right in the app, and you can even use TikTok's creative tools to easily make content and find creators to help sell your products for you. But you have to start now. So head over to getstarted TikTok TikTok.com holiday24 and drive more holiday sales today.
[77:35]
Speaker E
I won't let my moderate to severe.
[77:36]
Speaker C
Plaque psoriasis symptoms define me.
[77:38]
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[78:02]
Speaker D
Serious allergic reactions may occur. Trimphia may increase your risk of infections and lower your ability to fight them. Before treatment, your doctor should check you for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms of infection, including fever, sweats, chills, muscle aches or cough. Tell your doctor if you had a.
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Novo Nordisk Representative
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