California Chaos & Gluten Conspiracies

Summary

Karma & Chaos with Kail Lowry & Becky Hayter
Episode: California Chaos & Gluten Conspiracies
Release Date: May 12, 2026
Host: PodcastOne

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Episode Overview

In this lively and unfiltered episode, friends and co-hosts Kail Lowry and Becky Hayter find themselves in California, juggling the chaos and karma that defines much of their 30s. The pair dive into personal health sagas, food adventures (and disasters), hilarious parenting moments, and the day-to-day unpredictability of friendship and family life. Packed with authenticity, humor, and heartfelt moments, this episode brings a candid look at modern adulthood, all set to the backdrop of their upcoming "Fatherless Behavior Tour."

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Life on the Road — California Adventures

• Location: Beverly Hills, Los Angeles
• Kail and Becky are staying together in LA, adjusting to West Coast time and dealing with less-than-glamorous realities at their hotel — like finding toenails in the carpet.
  • “I sat down at the mirror this morning on the floor and there was toenails in the carpet.” – Kail (02:39)
• The duo joke about sharing a hotel room, appreciating their low-maintenance friendship and the ability to coexist without pressure to entertain, even when things get messy or sleep schedules clash.

2. Dining (and Digestive) Misadventures

• Becky recounts a memorable fine dining experience, sharing about eating beef tartare and trying tinned octopus for the first time, while Kail humorously mourns the octopus.
  • “Like that octopus knew up until the time that it was tinned. It knew.” – Kail (06:09)
  • “I'm sending PETA after you.” – Kail (07:55)
• The conversation turns to celiac disease and Kail’s developing digestive struggles, amplified by eating gluten.
  • Candid discussion of “shitting in a cup” for medical tests, near-emergencies in random bathrooms and Ubers, and the uphill battle of finding gluten-free options while traveling.
  • “When I don’t shit my pants anymore, I’m going to be so excited.” – Kail (12:13)

3. Parenting Updates & Kid Chaos

• Becky shares updates about her son Bex, who had a head scan due to rapid growth but was ultimately just found to “have a big head.” Kail relates with a vulnerable story about her own son’s newborn health scares (24:34–25:46).
• Becky’s wildest parenting tale: finding her son chewing on mouse guts, presumably dropped off by their outdoor cats.
  • “I swipe my finger in this kid's mouth and I pull out mouse guts.” – Becky (31:03)
• Further rodent chaos: mice infest Becky’s car, discovered in the air filter — maggots and all (34:12).

4. Relentless Rodents & Environmental Tangents

• Both share stories about country living, invading cats, and the environmental impact of letting cats roam free.
  • “Cats aren’t supposed to be in this environment.” – Becky (37:21)

5. Travel Woes & Airline Closures

• Spirit Airlines shuttering impacts Becky’s travel plans. Fuel prices and the struggle to afford travel are lamented. (38:09–39:01)

6. Updates & Life Changes

A. The Podcast Tour/Community

• Excitement for the "Fatherless Behavior Tour," logistical plans, audience participation with the “Chaos Wheel,” and the touching stories of fans buying extra tickets to gift to others.
  • “Jamie… bought extra tickets to some shows to gift to people... it was just so kind.” – Becky (40:34)

B. Moving & Downsizing

• Becky reveals her family is officially moving, downsizing their home to let her wife work less and spend more time with family. Plans for a collaborative Patreon move-in/decluttering party and estate sale. (47:10–51:06)
• Kail is house-hunting, considering relocating to North Carolina or possibly Atlanta or Dallas, discussing the desire to give each kid their own room and the emotional implications of moving with her children. (45:48–59:00)
  • “My kids didn’t ask for this and they all deserve privacy.” – Kail (54:08)

C. Relationship Community Discourse

• Becky calls out the ongoing “Ike slander” (Kail’s partner), assuring listeners she was once skeptical but now stands behind the relationship, and reminding everyone that it’s okay to support both Ike and Kail’s ex, Elijah.
  • “Let’s all have a clean slate, right? ... He’s here to stay and we love him.” – Becky (61:25)
  • “You can be Team Elijah and also give Ike a chance.” – Kail (62:10)

7. Parenting Advice Segment — Community Q&A (Is it Karma or Chaos?)

• A listener writes in about her 18-year-old son wanting to skip school and drive a thousand miles to see his girlfriend after a breakup, and the hosts offer empathy (and a reality check) about impulsive young love.
  • “His frontal lobe isn’t developed and he’s making an impulsive decision.” – Listener email read by Becky (64:02)
  • “You can’t reason with someone who’s in that emotional state. And I know, because I was that kid.” – Kail (66:07)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I support Marcellus from Remarkably Bright Creatures. …It is breaking my heart to hear you ate such an intelligent creature, and I’m not okay with it.” – Kail (05:34)
• "Honestly, I think shitting my pants in public as a 34 year old adult is also really severe.” – Kail (10:26)
• “I want to punch him in the face sometimes.” – Becky, about toddler tantrums (26:58)
• “Cats aren’t supposed to be in this environment… letting cats outside is really bad for our environment.” – Becky (37:21)
• “You are not classy enough to live here. …I’m like, you little shit.” – Kail, about her son's feedback on house hunting (58:27)
• “Let’s all switch over, and let’s all welcome him [Ike] with open arms and give…just give him a chance.” – Becky (62:03)
• “You can like both of them. It’s okay.” – Becky, on Kail’s ex and current partner (63:31)

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Important Timestamps

• 02:39 – Hotel hilarities: the toenail incident in Beverly Hills
• 04:53–06:09 – Fine dining, octopus-gate, and ethical eating banter
• 09:44–12:13 – Kail’s gluten/health issues & comedic oversharing about celiac disease
• 22:02–24:04 – Parenting updates: baby head scans and generational health info
• 31:03–32:13 – Becky’s son, the mouse fiasco, and calling the health department
• 34:12–35:38 – Mice infestation in the car: discovering dead mice, maggots, and the gross aftermath
• 38:09–39:01 – Spirit Airlines’ closure and rising travel costs
• 40:34–43:07 – Community stories, going to the tour solo, and building connections
• 47:10–51:06 – Moving updates, downsizing, and massive decluttering plans
• 54:08–57:15 – Kail on privacy and living situations for kids after moving
• 61:25–63:31 – Relationship discourse—addressing the Ike/Elijah fandoms
• 64:02–67:29 – Q&A: Advice for parents of impulsive, heartbroken teens

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Additional Highlights

• Both hosts are deeply open about their vulnerabilities—whether health, parenting, or relationships—providing reassurance and laughter to listeners facing similar challenges.
• The episode features a back-and-forth that is equally playful and poignant, reflecting the real complexities and rewards of adult friendships.
• Listener engagement is high, with Becky and Kail responding directly to community questions and sharing stories from their Patreon and tour support network.
• This episode is a relatable glimpse into the mess, mishaps, love, and learning that comprise “karma and chaos.”

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For tour details and to join their communities:

• www.kailowry.com
• Patreon links for both hosts (as referenced throughout)

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If you missed this episode, you missed:

• Mouse guts, octopus guilt, and the realities of gluten intolerance
• Deep dives on friendship and acceptance—both in new cities and old relationships
• Unfiltered, warm-hearted, and irreverently real advice and parenting tales

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Stay tuned for the next episode of Karma & Chaos, where friendship meets the unpredictable – and don’t forget to leave a review for a chance to be featured!

Transcript

[Becky Hater]

Going to the gym used to stress me out more than it helped me. I'd show up, do a bunch of stuff with no real plan and leave having no idea if I did anything right. And when life gets busy, which with a nine month old, it always is, the gym is the first thing to go. Tonal can completely change that. It's a strength training system that mounts right on your wall at home. And it does way more than just provide weight. It takes the mental load completely off. And it does a quick assessment, sets the optimal weight for every move and adjusts in 1 pound increments as you actually get stronger. So you're always being challenged, never plateauing. It gives you real time coaching cues so your form is right and you're lifting safely. And the workout variety is real strength, aerial hit, yoga, mobility. So you're never stuck with doing the same thing. A full gym and a personal trainer in your house 24, 7. That part alone so sold me. Right now, tonal is offering our listeners 200 off your tonal purchase with promo code karma. That's tonal.com and use promo code karma for $200 off your purchase. That's tonal.com promo code karma for $200 off.

[Karma]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states. Okay, guys, we're back. You asked for it and we're delivering. Killer is going on tour. We're super excited for the fatherless behavior tour. 23 cities, three countries, all in one summer. And you guys can check out tour dates and see if we're coming to a city near you on killlowery.com and if you want early access to information and announcements, head over to Patreon because you might get it before everyone else.

[Becky Hater]

All right, well, welcome back everyone to Are we rolling? She already gave me the thumbs up, up.

[Karma]

So we're in. We're in California right now. Becky gets the cues from behind the glass.

[Becky Hater]

Good morning, good evening, good day, good night to all of our karmaroos out there.

[Karma]

I want to tell you that I came prepared with things to talk about.

[Becky Hater]

You did that to show off.

[Karma]

We're.

[Becky Hater]

We're at the boss. We're at the boss's house. And it's like I need to prove that I bring value.

[Karma]

I think I've proved that enough.

[Becky Hater]

We're in la, people. We're on LA time.

[Karma]

We're actually in Beverly Hills because we're bougie as. No, no, we're not. We're not bougie as. Actually, there was. I sat down at the mirror this morning on the floor and. And there was toenails in. In the carpet. And so I went to the front desk and I politely was like, hey, I would have told you this when I checked in, but unfortunately I never sat down at the floor to do my own makeup until today. And there's literal toenails. And so I will show you guys a picture of the toenails. And so they said that they were going to give me extra points, but it was so disturbing. And so they did claim to be giving me extra points towards my. My account with them.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

So that was really sweet. I hope it'll cover one of my tour dates. Stays.

[Becky Hater]

I hope so too. We've been sharing a bedroom which is.

[Karma]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

It's so unique to be able to find someone that you're comfortable where it's not like a nuisance to share a hotel room with. Right.

[Karma]

No, it. You are so, like, low maintenance in terms of like, I don't feel like I have to entertain you. Also, if I want to go to sleep, you don't give a. And you'll let me sleep. Or vice versa.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

But we did have a scenario because yesterday, when Becky was it yesterday? No, two nights ago. Becky comes in like a ninja in the middle of the night. I never hear her. I sleep through it in the morning. Somebody that was sleeping in the room before us must have set the hotel alarm clock and it just is blaring at 6am and none of us could go back to sleep after that because we're so used to west coast or east coast time. So it's nine o' clock at home, it's six o' clock here. But none of us get to sleep in at home. So we thought, we're gonna get to sleep in until 7:30. Yeah, no, ma'. Am.

[Becky Hater]

No, ma'. Am. And then we just had quiet phone time.

[Karma]

Yeah. We scrolled Doom scrolled, checked emails, did all the things. We did all the things.

[Becky Hater]

Well, last night I went out to dinner and I had one of the best meals of my life. I listen, I'm not a materialistic girl. I refuse to spend money on things except for technology. Right. Like cameras, TVs. But I am a sucker for fine dining.

[Karma]

So she's eating raw beef and I'm in the hotel room.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. I'm like, just, if I can get a bunch of small plates of really just good food and share it with people, like, that is a love language to me. I love beef tartare if it's made right. But you can only, like, you can't get these things, like, at a diner. Right. You can't order it at any restaurant. You have to be at certain restaurants or the quality is bad. I did fo. I tried tinned octopus for the first time.

[Karma]

No.

[Becky Hater]

This place I went to had all, like, tinned fish. I'm not a huge tinned fish person, but I was like, oh, I'll try tin octopus. It was okay.

[Karma]

No, we're not. I have. I support Marcellus from Remarkably Bright Creatures. If you have not listened to that audiobook, you need to.

[Becky Hater]

There's a movie coming out too. Yes.

[Karma]

And I am not. I don't eat seafood. I. Any sushi. If you've ever seen me post about sushi, I'm not lying when I say this. It's imitation crab. The sushi that I eat is imitation crab. I do not eat seafood. So it is breaking my heart to hear that you ate such an intelligent creature, and I'm not okay with it. Like that octopus knew up until the time that it was tinned. It knew.

[Becky Hater]

It knew what?

[Karma]

That it was.

[Becky Hater]

It knew its family.

[Karma]

It knew that it was dying.

[Becky Hater]

It knew that it was gonna get captured and eaten.

[Karma]

Yeah. They're so smart.

[Becky Hater]

Do you want me to apologize to that octopus?

[Karma]

I want you to promise me that you're never gonna eat octopus again.

[Becky Hater]

I'm not making that promise. I like octopus. You don't eat fried calamari?

[Karma]

No.

[Becky Hater]

Huh.

[Karma]

I thought calamari was squid. But also still the same. I'm not. Okay. And

[Becky Hater]

is there a difference?

[Karma]

A squid is an entirely different animal. I'll look it up. Squid.

[Becky Hater]

But are they in the same family?

[Karma]

Octopus, it says. Okay, so is squid and octopus the name the same thing? No. They're both marine mollusks with high intelligence. So I guess a squid is just as intelligent. And octopus has eight arms, while squid has eight arms and two specialized feeding tentacles totaling 10. So that's like a big deal, right? And then it says octopuses have rounded, soft bodies, but squids have elongated, streamlined, tube like bodies. So at the end of the day, they might be related.

[Becky Hater]

You learn something new every day on this podcast. I hope that everyone on here enjoys our my lack of knowledge and your gain in fun facts, because I don't know, is that a common Thing that people did, you know?

[Karma]

Yeah, not you.

[Becky Hater]

Did you know?

[Karma]

Yeah, everybody knew that. Everyone knew that.

[Becky Hater]

Wait just one second, let me just.

[Karma]

I'm not well. Like this is not a well situation that you did this.

[Becky Hater]

I don't care.

[Karma]

Okay, well, I'm sending PETA after you. In other news, I would like to say that you guys can go buy tour [e-mail].

[Becky Hater]

i'm back. Anyway, fine dining was great. I came home active.

[Karma]

No, because you know what I'm upset about now?

[Becky Hater]

Oh my God.

[Karma]

You told me about the beef tartare last night.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

You did not mention squid last night. Or octopus.

[Becky Hater]

Even if I did, you probably wouldn't have paid attention.

[Karma]

I would have been upset.

[Becky Hater]

No, grow up.

[Karma]

You grow up.

[Becky Hater]

Do you like. Are you a vegetarian?

[Karma]

I mean, yeah, I would say I'm for the women for sure.

[Becky Hater]

Like, you eat meat?

[Karma]

Yeah, I do.

[Becky Hater]

You eat beef? Beef are friendly little dog like animals too. Are you mad at yourself?

[Karma]

Yeah, I am actually. I am. Actually. I also would like to say that while we're on the topic of food in la, I want to say that it is. I was today years old, actually yesterday years old when I realized that everybody is correct. I most likely have Celiac's disease. And so when I get home, I do have to shit in a cup. Okay, so the doctor did order a script where they're going to test me for celiac's disease. And I'm going to say, I'm going to tell you this, okay? Get here the first day, eat Mexican immediately find this random man's bathroom to shit in. Like I don't know this man from a can of paint. He's sitting outside. I said, oh my God, do you have a bathroom? Cuz I had no idea where I was. And he let me use his bathroom in his house. It was like his business. It was like a, like a workshop, like garage door situation. So he lets me in, I'm in there, I'm so sick. Next day we order sandwiches. You, me, Ike, we order sandwiches, get sick again, have Thai for dinner, right? The Thai food on the menu says what? My options that I picked were gluten free. I did not get sick. And like, I know that sounds dramatic, but like the gluten free meal that I had, I ate the entire thing and did not get sick at all.

[Becky Hater]

I could be wrong and I'm wrong about a lot of things, but I'm pretty sure people with celiac disease like will die if they eat gluten. Like it's beyond the things that you have, like, I'm sure you're gluten intolerant.

[Karma]

I googled it and it said that it is normal for 30 and 40 year olds to be diagnosed with celiac disease.

[Becky Hater]

Interesting.

[Karma]

That's what it said.

[Becky Hater]

Like, I'm not saying you don't have it. I just thought it was like celiac was more severe. Like there's more severe.

[Karma]

Maybe there is for sure.

[Becky Hater]

Eating.

[Karma]

But like, honestly, I think shitting my pants in public as a 34 year old adult is also really severe. Yeah, no, I felt like I was going to die. Like, I'm texting Ike on the toilet, like it's going to come up and out. Do you know what I mean? Let me google.

[Becky Hater]

No, I don't, but I do. However, do you think that if you do do get diagnosed, do you think that if you do get diagnosed that you'll actually follow gluten free?

[Karma]

I'm going to protocols. No, no, no. Ike is shaking his head. No. I just want to say that I'm going to do my best. And the reason why I'm saying that is because, like, it's miserable. Like, when I don't know if I'm going to get sick, it is so miserable to not know if something I eat is going to make me shit my pants. So, like, we've had some really close calls. I almost shit myself in that Uber, so I had to ask that man to use his bathroom or I was going to all over this Escalade. Okay, so like, okay, so this is what it says. 30s diagnosis. Let's see what it says. Okay. It says getting celiac diagnosis in your 30s is common, often triggered by stress, pregnancy or infection, which I've had multiple strep throat infections in the last six months. And then I've also had severe stress. It says it prevents. It presents with symptoms like fatigue, digestive issues or anemia, which I also have. And while life.

[Becky Hater]

Most importantly, no pregnancies.

[Karma]

Most importantly, no pregnancies. And it says, although often considered a childhood disease, many are diagnosed between 40 and 60, meaning 30s. Diagnosis is common midlife onset. So it is possible. So I have to shit in a cup and I'm not thrilled about that.

[Becky Hater]

I bet you are. Like gluten intolerant. I mean, you have to be, right?

[Karma]

Listen, when I don't shit my pants anymore, I'm going to be so excited.

[Becky Hater]

Okay, well, we'll get there.

[Karma]

This episode is sponsored by Better Help. Life is a journey, and some days feel good, while others feel overwhelming. But we're here to remind you May is Mental Health Awareness Month. A reminder that whatever you're going through, you don't have to do it alone. And Better Help is a great option. Whatever is keeping you up at night, it's easy to feel like you have to figure it all out right now on your own. But the truth is that nobody has all the answers. We're all just doing this for the first time. And truly, no journey should be done alone. So having someone with you to listen to, understand and support you can make all the difference.

[Becky Hater]

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[Karma]

You don't have to be on this journey alone. Find support and have someone with you in therapy sign up and get 10% [e-mail] this episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. All right, you guys may as mental health awareness Month a reminder that whatever you're going through, you don't have to do it alone. Becky and I are huge fans of therapy. We have advocated for it, talked about it over the last several years, and we all know that life is a journey. Some days feel good and others feel super overwhelming. But whatever it is that's keeping you up or causing anxiety for you, you don't have to do this all by yourself. Okay? You don't have to do this all by yourself. The truth is, no one has all the answers and no journey should be done alone. So check out Better Help as an option. It's something that's comfortable, it's in the comfort of your own home. And Better Help therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the US And Better Help does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals instead of looking for the person right. You fill out a short questionnaire and it helps identify what needs and preferences you have. And then they use their 12 plus years of experience to do your matching. They do typically get it right the first time, but if you aren't happy with your match, you can switch to a different therapist from their tailored recommendations at any point. They also have over 30,000 therapists and BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform, having served over 6 million people globally. And it works. So they have an average rating of 4.9 out of 5 for a live session based on over 1.7 million clients. Client reviews. So that's a lot of reviews. You can go check them out yourself. You don't have to be on this journey alone. Find support and have someone with you in therapy. Sign up and get 10 [e-mail] Karma that's betterhelp.com Karma and Doug there's nowhere I wouldn't go to help someone customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual.

[Becky Hater]

Even if it means sitting front row

[Karma]

at a comedy show.

[Becky Hater]

Hey everyone, check out this guy and his bird. What is this, your first date? Oh no. We help people customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual together.

[Karma]

We're married.

[Becky Hater]

Me to a human, him to a bird. Yeah, the bird looks out of your league. Anyways, get a'@libertymutual.com or with your local agent.

[Karma]

Liberty Liberty. Liberty Liberty. This is a paid message from GoFundMe. Meet Juan Naula. When his son was hospitalized for a viral infection, Juan started a GoFundMe to pay for medical expenses.

[Becky Hater]

It was 5k to pay the bill for my son and I need only 22 hours. It was amazing. People really trust on GoFundMe.

[Karma]

How did Juan raise $5,000 in less than a day? He posted a short video on GoFundMe telling his story in 30 seconds.

[Becky Hater]

30 seconds. Be specific, be quick and tell. What are you going to be using the funds for? I was nervous to do it because it doesn't feel okay to ask money. But you shouldn't be nervous. Sometimes you just have to do it and see the results. We were able to save my son's life thanks to gofundme that we still have my son with us.

[Karma]

Start your GoFundMe today at gofundme.com that's gofundme.com gofundme.com this message reflects one person's experience.

[Becky Hater]

Anyway, what I was saying before was I got home from dinner and I Walked into the hotel room, and all I see is this bright red light. First of all, I went and grabbed a drinky poo with icky poo in the lobby. This man, he deals with a lot. Amaretto sour, which is just, like, so interesting to me.

[Karma]

I forgot her gift. I bought you a gift. Oh, guess what it is. I was so excited to get it.

[Becky Hater]

Did you buy it here?

[Karma]

No, I bought it at home. They had a limited edition camo crown apple. And I said, I have to get this for Becky. It was a limited edition bag with a camo.

[Becky Hater]

That is so thoughtful.

[Karma]

And I was like, becky loves crown. I have to get this for her. That is so cool. And I completely forgot to give it to you.

[Becky Hater]

Is that your house in Delaware?

[Karma]

Yes.

[Becky Hater]

Well, we'll see a lot of each other.

[Karma]

Yeah, we'll just know that I bought it for you.

[Becky Hater]

Bring it to the first show. We could celebrate the first show.

[Karma]

Yes. I will take a shot with you there. And I'm not a drinker.

[Becky Hater]

You heard it here first.

[Karma]

You heard it here first. So. Yes. And I was so excited. Cause he had seen something his dad likes. And then I was going scrolling the aisle.

[Becky Hater]

What's that like?

[Karma]

Yeah, what's it like having a dad? So I saw this in the aisle, and I said, becky, thank you.

[Becky Hater]

Anyway, back to the story again.

[Karma]

Sorry.

[Becky Hater]

Here we go. I walked into the hotel room, red lights blaring. Kale's face down or no, face up. Naked on a massage table, getting her lymph nodes just hammered on. Just like she's, you know, she's draining them. She's rubbing her. And I'm like, okay, do I need to leave? I just laid down. We all just had a fun old time.

[Karma]

Yeah, it was like a hakuna matata moment.

[Becky Hater]

I don't know if I would use those words, but those. She was so nice. What was her name? Emily.

[Karma]

Emily.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, she was great. Shout out, Emily.

[Karma]

Yeah, she's great.

[Becky Hater]

Shout out, Drew.

[Karma]

Drea did my hair and makeup this week. I did my own makeup this morning. But so, yeah, I did WWE training the other day. And then my body, when I tell you I was so sore, I was like, I have to get a massage. But also, I wonder if that was kind of a dumb move as well, because when you wake up the next day after you have a massage, you're also really sore.

[Becky Hater]

You would have been complaining today either way. So.

[Karma]

Okay, cool. So do you want to get to the topics that I wanted to talk about today?

[Becky Hater]

What were you going to say about Me in WWE before.

[Karma]

Oh, when we down. You know, here's the thing about wwe. Like, all of the characters, male and female, have, like, very distinct story lines and characters and stuff. I feel like you'd have a really badass character for wwe, probably. And you're so strong that I feel like it would be such a badass, like, whole storyline.

[Becky Hater]

It's too bad I don't have an acl.

[Karma]

True.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

And neither does your dog.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. You guys are twins, right? Yeah.

[Karma]

I just didn't know a dog could tear their ACL.

[Becky Hater]

It's expensive. It was $8,000 to fix, and then

[Karma]

she tore it again.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

And then just like you.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. I've torn it four times, so. Yeah. If ACL is genetic, I'm really sorry to my kid.

[Karma]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

I saw a TikTok, though, that said that your kid's athleticism comes from the mom, not from the dad.

[Karma]

Okay. Yikes. Sorry to my children. Sorry in advance. Although, you know what? I do still believe firmly that if my mom would have put me in basketball like I wanted to in elementary school.

[Becky Hater]

Here we go.

[Karma]

I do think that I had a chance to go.

[Becky Hater]

What, to play the wnba?

[Karma]

Well, fuck, no. But at least be able to make a fucking shot. You know what I mean? Like, I. I barely stand a chance against Lincoln, and he's 12, so I think that if my mom would have honed in on that early on.

[Becky Hater]

I beat Lincoln's ass in basketball the last time I played him.

[Karma]

I did beat him in horse not too long ago. Soccer is a different story. I could never beat anyone in soccer. Okay. That would never happen. But basketball, I can.

[Becky Hater]

You know, we should go to the field the next time we hang out with your kids, we should go to the field and you can play goalie.

[Karma]

That would be fun. That would be fun. There's a really nice field by us that Lincoln used to play at, and usually it's clear on the weekends so that it's turf, so we should do that. Okay, I'm down.

[Becky Hater]

Oh, we could do it when you guys come visit with Lincoln. We could just.

[Karma]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Do a deal. I'm down.

[Becky Hater]

We can do some videos of, like, me and Lincoln doing, like. Like penalty kicks on you and stuff.

[Karma]

Yeah, no, that would be so fun. I mean, I might have to wear, like, a helmet, but I just got my face done. You know what I mean? I don't want to fuck it up. I paid good money for my double chin removal.

[Becky Hater]

You do not have to wear a helmet. Okay.

[Karma]

Okay. I want Go ahead. I'll let you go first.

[Becky Hater]

Let me just give a quick little update.

[Karma]

Yeah, please do. I'm excited to hear the update.

[Becky Hater]

Well, the last time we met we talked about Bex having to get his head scan. My poor boy with his big dome.

[Karma]

To be fair.

[Becky Hater]

What?

[Karma]

I never looked at him and was like, he has a big head. Sometimes I do, but not big enough to be concerned. Do you know what I mean? Like there's big heads and then there's

[Becky Hater]

always had a big head. That's, that's why it's like just you look at him and he's just always been a big headed kid. But anyway, his head jumped to like two tears off the charts. He had to get his brain head scanned, a little ultrasound and then as well as an X ray. We went to see the neurologist for the follow up and he just has a big head.

[Karma]

He'll grow into it.

[Becky Hater]

The soft spot is still like it wasn't like protruding like it was still indented how it's supposed to. So like if there's typically sometimes something wrong, it'll like push out.

[Karma]

Can I actually tell you a story about that?

[Becky Hater]

Can I finish?

[Karma]

Yeah, when you're done. Of course. Why is she so mean to me?

[Becky Hater]

Who are you talking to?

[Karma]

The camera? Yeah, the fuck?

[Becky Hater]

So we. But we have to just watch it for the next three months to make sure there's no double jump again. Like it. It now should even out, like curve out to where it is.

[Karma]

So I don't feel like you have a big head. And I've seen pictures of his.

[Becky Hater]

My head's proportionate to my body, so

[Karma]

his will be too.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, I have like a decent size head and Matt has a decent size has and like that was really eye opener for us too of. Because we had to ask Matt what his head size was and we, it was just so nice that we had access to him to ask that. So Matt, we both are on like the higher percentile of head size comparative to the average human. So we both. And his family has really big heads. So he asked his mom too.

[Karma]

That's so sweet though.

[Becky Hater]

I know.

[Karma]

Because they're like people like me who could never even get medical knowledge from my, from my dad's side and I, yeah, know who he was and like you have a donor and you can get information that I couldn't. Do you know what I'm saying? Like that's great. Yeah, I love that.

[Becky Hater]

So in that same week, just another little quick update on Becks for those of you that don't know. I have cats, and they're indoor, outdoor cats. I live on 20 acres. These love to bring us dead animals. Yeah, same all the time. They're. I just. Snakes, birds, rabbits, everything.

[Karma]

You have to talk about the car.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, that's. I'm leading into that after this.

[Karma]

Okay. Wait. Can I tell you the head story really quick, though? While we were on that topic.

[Becky Hater]

Yes.

[Karma]

You talked about the soft spot on Rex's head. When I was having Elliot at Sacred Heart Hospital in Allentown, which is a very religious hospital, by the way, not only did they come in the next morning with a nun talking to me about a baby out of wedlock, the doctor came in and told me. Now, mind you, nobody stayed at the hospital with me overnight. Not Janet, not Eddie, not Joe, not Joe's brother. Nobody stayed with me. So I wake up in the morning, and the pediatrician comes in and says his soft spot is almost completely fused. There is a chance that, you know, if we don't correct this now, he will be mentally challenged for the rest of his life. Like, his brain will grow and his skull will be fused.

[Becky Hater]

I've never heard this.

[Karma]

So I'm 17 years old. Nobody is with me. And I'm just crying because I'm thinking, either they're gonna have to saw my son's head open, or he's gonna be mentally challenged for the rest of his life. Like, it's gonna stunt the growth. That's terrifying. Once I left and we had to stay a couple extra days. Cause he was so jaundiced that we had to do the blue light and then take the blue light home. So we were in the hospital a little bit longer than anticipated. And so that was, like, really, really scary.

[Becky Hater]

That's terrifying.

[Karma]

And then, so when I had Lincoln years later, I was, like, worried about it, but it ended up being fine. It didn't fuse. It was completely fine. But I say all that to say, like, that's a thing.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

So scary.

[Becky Hater]

Anyways, no, it's any. I would never have been prepared for, like, the sickening feeling. And it makes me feel guilty because in the end, everything has always been okay so far with Bex. And then a lot of people don't get that, like, there are issues they have to deal with. And I don't know if I could handle. I mean, obviously, as parents, we all are, like, step up to the challenge of handling it. But it's just, like, it's so overwhelming. And, like, if so, if you are dealing with any type of kid thing, like, I Just wasn't prepared for like this sickness. Like, I, like, I felt ill having to go. But it's so funny. Bex always gets so many compliments. Like the people that were with us at the neurologist, they were like, this is the cutest and happiest baby we've ever. Like, this is my favorite patient.

[Karma]

He's literally the best. He's always so happy. Even when he's sat like sick, he's like happy.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. He's starting to throw some tantrums here and there and he will not stop fucking throwing food on the ground and.

[Karma]

Oh, that's normal.

[Becky Hater]

And it pisses me off so bad.

[Karma]

It's so normal. And it probably.

[Becky Hater]

I want to punch him in the face sometimes.

[Karma]

Yeah. I mean, I'll tell you what though. Rio's three danger. Three major stage right now.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

Is rough. Like, it's the. I don't. When he doesn't, when he doesn't get his way, it's. I don't like you. First of all, you're three years old. Yeah, I don't like you.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

He'll be like, I don't like you no more. I don't like. You're three. You don't know what you like.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, true.

[Karma]

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[Becky Hater]

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[Karma]

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[Becky Hater]

includes a good porch swing or a poolside lounger.

[Karma]

When you book early, you get the best places at the best prices. But back to poolside loungers. With vrbo, you don't have to reserve any loungers. They're all yours.

[Becky Hater]

In fact, the whole private home is yours.

[Karma]

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[Becky Hater]

So I I am with Bex in the morning and I wake up and we go into his playroom. That's always our first stop. He plays with his farm and does his farm things, his farm chores, his farm chores. And then so when I walk in, I'm like, oh, there's dead mouse on the ground. So head is off of it, pick up the dead mouse. I crawl around on my hands and knees, feeling everywhere, just making sure there's nothing, no remnants left of this mouse. I'm laying. There's a daybed in there. I'm laying on the daybed. All of a sudden I look down and I see Bex chewing. And I'm like, no. I'm like, what could this. Like, there's nothing in his. I swipe my finger in this kid's mouth and I pull out mouse guts. I pulled out mouse guts. And then he started throwing up. And I was like, what do I do now?

[Karma]

Like, what do I do?

[Becky Hater]

And I'm thinking, I'm like, I'm not gonna tell Leah. Like, I don't wanna.

[Karma]

She's a literal health care provider.

[Becky Hater]

I was like, I'm not gonna tell her. I don't want. Like, she's gonna blame you sleeping. Like, I don't want to wake her up. And then I'm like, like, okay, no, I should tell her, because in case I should actually do something about this. And so I'm like, hey, everything's fine. But Bex did eat a dead mouse. He didn't swallow it. And she's like, you're. You're gonna have to call his doctor. Like, like, So I call Dr. Kim. He's great. He calls the health department. The health department was like, there's been no incidences in your area for the past 20 years of mice carrying anything infectious. No rabies. Like, rabies is what you're a lot of the time worried about. So Dr. Kim calls me. He's like, hey, there's nothing to be concerned about, but if it was my kid, I'd want to get 1000%. So I drove to the health department and brought the mouse to get tested and came back, and it was fine.

[Karma]

But no, that's actually terrifying, especially with everything that's going on with, like, hantavirus and things like that, which allegedly is from rodents.

[Becky Hater]

It is from rodents. It's not allegedly from rodents.

[Karma]

Okay. I don't know, because I don't want to misspeak. People hate when we misspeak.

[Becky Hater]

So this is an opinion podcast. It's not facts.

[Karma]

Okay. Tik Tok University, Karma and Chaos University.

[Becky Hater]

I saw a TikTok that it was a girl making a video that was replying to a comment, because I guess she was, you know, make kind of making fun of the situation. And the comment said, like, what if this was your family on the. On the cruise? And she was like, my family has never been on an airplane. You think my family's gonna be, like, gonna be on a cruise? I guess it was, like, $15,000 to go on this cruise. Like, it was.

[Karma]

Yeah, it was expensive.

[Becky Hater]

It was like, an expensive one. She's like, I don't give a shit. My family would. Like, we wouldn't be. Why would be on a damn cruise? But it was just really. It was funny.

[Karma]

But I am a little like, okay, obviously, I'm not trying to be insensitive, but, like, when someone dies on a cruise ship, is there somewhere to put the body so it doesn't. Like, do they have a more.

[Becky Hater]

Do you have morgues on a cruise ship?

[Karma]

There's morgues on a cruise ship is crazy. So, like. But then like also, how do we feel about them letting the people off the cruise ship without having someone go into the cruise ship to treat people on the cruise ship? Because I feel like that's a situation where like, if it was going to be a.

[Becky Hater]

Let people home before they knew it what it was, three people had died on it before, but they didn't know what it was. Yeah, I think it's just. Yeah, it's really sad. I mean, unfort, like super unfortunate. Obviously these things you can't plan to happen or prepare to happen. But let's just continue down this road of mice for a minute here. So after this whole thing happened with Bex, Leah had been complaining about our car smell. Like we have two cars. The car she drives is actually my car and I drive her car because we use her car for Beck's because it's bigger. I don't know. I said that because it's not relevant.

[Karma]

But anyway, one of the cars was stinking.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. And so there's a air filter behind your glove box. And typically if a rodent makes a nest, like it will be in there. And so I removed it and they're sure as shit. There was about eight dead mice in this filter behind her, behind the glove box. And I take them out. I take the filter out first and the mice start moving. And I'm like, oh, shit. They're like, this one's still breathing. And then I'm like. I look closer and I'm like, oh, shit, it has maggots full. It's full of maggots. It's not. It's dead. It's really dead.

[Karma]

How do they get up in there?

[Becky Hater]

I mean, it's. It's not like a locked place. Right. Like your car is.

[Karma]

But like, do they come in from the outside of the car?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, they come in from like the engine space, but like underneath.

[Karma]

You guys drive the cars all. Every day. So like, how the does that happen?

[Becky Hater]

I think we like parked the cars in the garage for a while for like during the snow season.

[Karma]

So like, maybe you didn't use one as often.

[Becky Hater]

Maybe. I don't know. It happens. It's not an uncommon.

[Karma]

No, no, for sure. I mean, I've seen like cats up there. Like you have to be careful of like kittens and stuff or like birds.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, anything but that.

[Karma]

When Becky sent the video, I said, go on, tick tock. Right the now. It was the craziest thing I've ever seen.

[Becky Hater]

So gross. I shoved my like phone in the back and there was someone dead further down. And I couldn't get to him. So I had a. It was like 300 to get it all removed and, like, taken out.

[Karma]

Are you kidding?

[Becky Hater]

No.

[Karma]

So Becky's like, I don't want anyone to think that you're. Like, you're dirty because you're absolutely not dirty. So Becky lives on, like, because the mouse in the house and then the mouse in the car, you know, people will take this and run. You know, people will do it.

[Becky Hater]

If it was you, maybe not me. I live in the middle of the woods.

[Karma]

That's what I was going to say. That's all I was going to say. So you have rodents because you live in the middle of the woods? Yeah, I actually have a problem with. I have one cat. Yeah. And she brings us animals all the time. Well, our, like, primary suite is on the first floor, and it has sliding glass doors to go outside to the backyard. And so barn cat, gumball venom always brings us animals in through the sliding glass doors. And so she brought in a mouse and was playing with it through the hallways, and it splattered blood all over our floor and our walls. And I was so disgusted. Ike got it, thank God. But then she brings a rabbit to the porch and rips it up on the porch. So the guts are just spread out all over the porch. And I'm like, have some fucking couth.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. You know. Oh, my God. Yeah, like, showing us a video.

[Karma]

It's a baby bunny. Like, why is that?

[Becky Hater]

No, that's a.

[Karma]

That's a rabbit.

[Becky Hater]

Rabbits have long tails.

[Karma]

That's the cat, and that's the rabbit, and it's ripping the fucking rabbit to shoot.

[Becky Hater]

I knew that that was the cat. Dude. I thought there's a tail. I thought have been a baby squirrel, not a rabbit.

[Karma]

No.

[Becky Hater]

Cats aren't supposed to be like. Cats are not native. Like, us letting cats outside is, like, really bad for our environment. Like, cats aren't supposed to be in this.

[Karma]

Wait, really?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

But, like, the cat. My cat's indoor, outdoor. I appreciate it because she gets the road. Like, because my. My house is on an old farm, we get field mouse. Field mice? Yeah. And so she gets them before they get in the house. Or, like, she gets little rodents. And so, like, I just. It doesn't matter to me.

[Becky Hater]

It doesn't matter to you. A lot of things don't matter to you. Oh, you know.

[Karma]

Okay, well, that's fine.

[Becky Hater]

Is it fine?

[Karma]

It's gonna have to be fine. Do you want me to talk about some of my items?

[Becky Hater]

Sure.

[Karma]

What were you gonna Say I was

[Becky Hater]

gonna talk about spirit closing down.

[Karma]

Yeah, talk about it.

[Becky Hater]

So I have a lot of flights booked. I actually agreed to do a lot of these things because there were spirit flights that were cheap, and then Spirit had to go and shut down. I had 10 Spirit Flights.

[Karma]

Yeah, I remember you saying that. And then. And then it didn't work out. Well, JetBlue's on the way out, too. Great.

[Becky Hater]

That's insane.

[Karma]

Well, and so it's actually scary. And I'm like, well, I'm about to book this tour. And I'm like, I have to fly. I mean, thankfully, some of it, it is like flying to the first city and then driving. But all the people that do businesses, like. Or do business, and all the people that have small businesses or, like, they have a sick loved one that has to, like, this makes me really sad. The cost of gas has gone up by, like, 30 or 40 cents overnight.

[Becky Hater]

The cost of gas here in la is like $8.

[Karma]

It's almost $8. Yeah, it's like seven something. It's insane. 750.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, it's crazy. Wild. Well, I didn't.

[Karma]

So we're just here to say that if we can't travel and you guys can't travel for the remainder of the year, we understand.

[Becky Hater]

Yes.

[Karma]

We fully empathize and sympathize with you guys. And, you know, it is what it is.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, it is what it is.

[Karma]

I'm gonna do my best on tour, and if y' all see me struggling to, you know.

[Becky Hater]

Tour's gonna be so fun, though.

[Karma]

Yeah. I mean, if we have to live in the Sprinter while we're gone because we can't pay for gas prices, it's fine.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, we'll sleep in the car.

[Karma]

We'll sleep in the car. It's fine.

[Becky Hater]

We'll just live stream the whole thing.

[Karma]

Yeah, for sure.

[Becky Hater]

You guys should come to tour. If you haven't bought your tickets yet, make sure you buy your tickets, make sure it's a show that. I'm going to.

[Karma]

Guess what came in the mail. The Chaos Wheel. Oh, I ordered it. And so, yeah, it came in the mail, and so we're gonna write some stuff on it, and we'll be able to spin the wheel so that. Well, actually, I want audience members to do it. So we're gonna call up people, and then I have giveaways coming. Two tickets will be given away to every single city that we're going on tour for. So I think either this week or next week, we're doing the first four tour dates. We're gonna do a giveaway for those, and I'm really excited to see everybody in person and do the whole tour thing.

[Becky Hater]

It's gonna be so much fun. And can I tell you something really cute and fun? So I hosted my Sunday reset that I do for my Patreon, and we were like. Me and my girlies were on the call, and we were just yip, yapping back and forth. Everyone was going through which tour dates they're going to. A bunch of people are going to, like, meet up and stuff. And one of the girls, I asked if she was going, she said, it's just, like, not a great time for, like, you know, which is completely valid.

[Karma]

We understand.

[Becky Hater]

And so Jamie, who's also in your chapter seven, remember, I was like, yeah. And you were like, you know her? I'm like, yeah, dude. She was on for the Haters, blah, blah. She bought extra tickets to some shows to gift to people. And after that call, she, like, had sent her tickets for the show that she wanted to go to, and it was just so kind.

[Karma]

And so, Jamie, we love you. Honestly, that is. That is like, the sweetest thing that I've ever heard. So I was wondering because, like, I can check ticket sales every single day, and some days there'll be just, like, an astronomical amount on one city. And I'm like, what the heck? And the one day there was just. I think it was like, I don't know, 24 at one time. And I was like, what the. Like, I wonder if that was the day that I. And I'm not saying she bought 24. I'm just saying she could have been in that number. But that's really sweet. I also. Heather Lomire, you. You should have her on for. For the Hater. She has a, like, a really incredible story. And so she messaged me and she said that there's, like. Oh. She messaged me and said that there's, like, a group of girls that met up at my last tour and they became friends and have been friends ever since, and they're meeting up again, and I just think that's so cool. Yeah, she'll be at Dallas.

[Becky Hater]

She was on the call.

[Karma]

Yeah. And she's so funny. She sent me a video of her son. He's a toddler, and Brody. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I didn't know if, you know, I don't know how much you know. And he pronounces your name fucky. Because, you know, toddlers, when they're, like, trying to. All my kids, all the toddlers Call Becky Ducky. And so my favorite age is, like, 2 and 3 when they're learning and saying this. These words. And he calls you fucky hater. And it's so funny to me. And so she sent me that video and I was like, I'm telling her that. But so, yeah.

[Becky Hater]

So come on the Sunday reset.

[Karma]

Oh, yeah. She. Yeah. Because I was gonna try to get on that one, but I was. I was flying that day, so I couldn't. But yeah. So she was telling me about the girls in the Facebook group and stuff that are meeting up and people that are going solo and meeting up together. If you're scared to come alone, don't be scared to come alone. There are so people that are coming alone. So go.

[Becky Hater]

It makes me so proud of people.

[Karma]

No, because it's scary. I know it's scary. Like, I remember the first time. Did you ever. Do you ever, like, go out to eat with yourself? Yeah, the first time I ever did that was probably, like, 2016. I went to a Chili's by myself and I felt so weird. But now I. It does not bother me at all. Like, I'll go eat by myself. I'll travel. I'll go to the movies by myself. I don't care. Yeah, I love it.

[Becky Hater]

I think it's so incredible, though, because I. I think it, like, says a lot about, like, the community also, that. That you've built around this and, like, around your podcast and stuff. Because you guys, you make people feel like they're a part of your story. So it ma. That's what makes them feel comfortable coming to see you, because that's how everyone else is around them as well. Right. Like, you've built these safe places for people to come. 100 and so this tour is just like, an arm of that. Right? Like, so it's. It's so cool to see, like, everyone is saying they bought tickets by themselves and they're, like, coming. I'm gonna do my best to go out to in the cities I can,

[Karma]

but, yeah, it's gonna be hard because we do have to leave right away to go to the next city. But if there's ever a chance, like, I'm going to the Carolinas a couple days early, so that'll be fun. I want to go check out some spots. Karma and Chaos podcast is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy. Just drop in some details about yourself and see if you're eligible to save some money. When you bundle your home and auto policies, the process only takes minutes and it could mean hundreds more in your pocket. Visit progressive.com after this episode to see if you could save Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states. Also, I'm gonna be in North Carolina a lot this year, so please send me all the places to go eat.

[Becky Hater]

Are you gonna say why, or are you just gonna say you're gonna be there?

[Karma]

Well, for one, I'm a bridesmaid in Kayla's wedding, so that's really exciting. And she was so Kayla. If you guys don't know who she is, she's on the killer team. But she's also one of my really good friends. I would go on a limb and say she's one of my best friends. And. And she is getting married in North Carolina. She lives in North Carolina, so I'm one of her bridesmaids. And then on top of that, we are hoping to potentially move to North Carolina. So we're checking out the area. We're going to get the school systems down. We're going to see what options there are. There are a couple other places that we want to look at. Like Atlanta and Dallas was number one on my list because I have family there and business there and things like that. But I just. Dallas sort of. It breaks my heart because, like, I would have such a strong support system there and I could be my sister support or, you know, be there with Sterling and my aunt and, you know, my cousins. But I have time, though. I have a couple years. My attorney suggested, you know, the timeline of when to file to relocate, what that would look like, and things like that. And I have to get a couple other things in order, but North Carolina is really number one on my list right now.

[Becky Hater]

You guys have been around long enough to know that her mind changes all the time, so.

[Karma]

But I'm pretty dead set on North Carolina.

[Becky Hater]

This is today's flavor.

[Karma]

This is true. This is true. So before anyone runs over to my baby dads, just let them know. It is just up in the air right now. But yeah, we're definitely looking. And I. I'm glad that I'm spending as much time there this year as I am because it will give me a chance to really, like, explore it and see if I would even like it.

[Becky Hater]

It. As long as there's an airport I can fly into, yes, I'll be there.

[Karma]

Yes.

[Becky Hater]

You had said something that I wanted to respond to, and now it. It. Damn. I'm moving, too.

[Karma]

You are Moving.

[Becky Hater]

You want to talk about it? We are moving. And it's so funny because I talk about this on my Sunday reset with my, like, Patreon girlies. And I'm like. I'm like, invited them all to come and help me move, and they probably will show up.

[Karma]

Yeah, I actually love that.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. So, like, I'm gonna, like, host them at the house for a weekend and just, like, have them help me, like, move all my stuff.

[Karma]

Wait, I love that.

[Becky Hater]

So if you wanna join, join Patreon at Becky Hater or Patreon.

[Karma]

You should also do, like, Facebook Marketplace. Come pick up your stuff.

[Becky Hater]

So this is what I'm doing. Okay. We are moving. It is officially official. We are moving. I know I talked about this, like, a year ago, how Leah's dad wanted us to move into this house. We said no, but now we're moving into that house. We are downsizing. Leah wants to be able to work less. We're gonna have our second kid soon. She wants to be able to be able to focus on that. Understandable. Want to be able to give that to her. Want to be able to build a home. She feels like a home. I love our house with every fiber of my being. I get it. I know it. I don't need to be told. It's like relief. Like, I get it.

[Karma]

But basically, this is like, the money that you're spending now in the house. You wouldn't have to spend that money when you move. No. So you're saving by downsizing thousands of dollars. Right. So by. When she says downsizing, it's not just the space of the house, because your house is really big for three people. So you're downsizing in how. In house space. But you're also downsizing your financial responsibility, which is the goal. Right. Because when you're saving that much money, she could work part time and still get the benefits.

[Becky Hater]

100.

[Karma]

Okay, so just clarifying for the listeners.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, we're down. Like, she. Like, so that Leah can work less. She wants to be more present. And which is fine. Like, that's. And our house is kind of like a kid death trap a little bit. And the outside is a kid death trap. So I'm on board now we're here. I'm not putting any pressure because what's the point? So we are going to be moving at the end of the year. We have to renovate the house

[Karma]

before you move.

[Becky Hater]

Before we move in.

[Karma]

Okay. So that'll be nice. Because trying to live through a renovation is insane.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Hell no.

[Karma]

I would and the house is cute. It is cute. It's not far from where you live now.

[Becky Hater]

Or it's not.

[Karma]

Okay.

[Becky Hater]

And we'll be back by Tommy and Liz, our old neighbors, who are really good friends. And so we'll have them back.

[Karma]

Will you have a guest room or no?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

How many bedrooms is the new one?

[Becky Hater]

It's four bedrooms. It's a ranch. It's four bedroom ranch. And then there is a room downstairs that we're gonna turn into like a guest quarters.

[Karma]

So you would have. Have your room, two kids rooms and a guest room.

[Becky Hater]

So no, we're gonna do our room, Beck's room, a playroom, and then a guest room with a crib in it for the baby, like the next kid. So it'll be set up as a guest room slash nursery. Cause they're big rooms.

[Karma]

Okay, got it, got it, got it. But the playroom essentially could be.

[Becky Hater]

It's a smaller room. We'll have a bed in there, like a day bed in there. But we did. The laundry's in the basement. There is now laundry in that room. So it'll be like a dual purpose.

[Karma]

Okay.

[Becky Hater]

We really wanted laundry on the first floor.

[Karma]

Same.

[Becky Hater]

So, yeah, it's like. It's almost. It's less than half the square footage we have now. But we have a huge house. Right. It's. It's.

[Karma]

Your house is so big for, like, I don't want to say for no reason.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, we don't use half our house.

[Karma]

When I lived in the middle town house, you'd been there at the time. I don't know why I thought that having a house that big was, like, necessary. I didn't use even half of it. Now. I would use it because of how big my family has grown. But the house size I'm in now, I think it's the perfect square footage. I just wish it was a different layout. So moving forward, when we do move, whether we build or buy, what do

[Becky Hater]

you wish was different about the layout?

[Karma]

The steps in the middle of the floor plan takes a lot of the square footage. And then the playroom and the office are too big for no reason. Like, we could have downsized those a little bit to give more main living area. And then the upstairs, I think, is so small for no reason. Like, we could have added a little bit more upstairs. But I've been like, going on Zillow and kind of checking the market where in the areas that we're looking at.

[Becky Hater]

And you're probably like, I could afford anything down here.

[Karma]

No, it's it's really amazing.

[Becky Hater]

I know. I'm like, oh, so what. What I wanted to. Before we wrap up housing and moving, what we're. With the downsizing, we also need to get rid of a lot of stuff.

[Karma]

Like, Like a marketplace.

[Becky Hater]

Listen, I am getting rid of everything.

[Karma]

Good for you.

[Becky Hater]

Like, literally, we. We are bringing our couch to this

[Karma]

new house and that's it.

[Becky Hater]

And. And the stuff in my office, because obviously that's all new and that's it.

[Karma]

Good for you. That's what we did. Literally, when I built this house house, I did not bring anything with because I was like, I just want to start over.

[Becky Hater]

Leah and I never buy nice furniture. Like, we're always buying shit off, like, marketplace. We just, like, never. Like, our couch is the first nice piece of furniture that we've bought in the 10 years of being together. And with how condensed this house is, we want to make sure. Like, we just want to have, like, nice. Like, my lamps in my room are from my sister's house 20 years ago. Like, you know what I mean? Like, the. The benches at our breakfast bar are like $20 each. That. And there's nothing wrong with that. But like, you could.

[Karma]

Like, at some point, you want to be in a place where you can buy.

[Becky Hater]

It's gonna have like an estate sale when we move. And just. I love that people can come in and buy whatever they want. And if anything else, pay what you can.

[Karma]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

So if you need stuff, keep an eye out. For my estate sale, we actually just

[Karma]

started downsizing some of our stuff too, like in our garage because. Cause the babies are getting older. Yeah. No, I haven't listed anything yet, but I will give you whatever I actually have. If you still have the veer wagon. I have extra pieces that have never been opened, like, stuff. But I. So I have three high chairs that I am saying goodbye to. They're in really, really good condition. My Uppababy Vista double stroller. Or it can be a double stroller. It's very well loved. I've had it since Creed was born and he's about to be sick. But I'll be listing that on Marketplace. You probably won't need that, but I'm gonna give some to one of the teachers at the baby's school. Cause she's having her second baby. So I'm gonna give some of the stuff to her that you don't need. But it's just so surreal because these are my last babies. Like, I'm not all that. This will be the last time. Like, when we move wherever we end up moving, whether it's in Delaware or out of Delaware. This will be the last time the cribs. Like, I won't need the cribs anymore. They'll all be in big, big kid beds.

[Becky Hater]

Is Rio almost out of a crib?

[Karma]

He's out of a crib. He's been out of a crib. What's so funny about. About Rio being out of the crib is. So I'll go put the twins to bed, and I have one on each hip, and I go put them to bed. Rio will go get in his bed, but in the mornings, they yell down the hall to each other because for some reason, Rio doesn't get out of his bed. Like, it's like he'll throw a fit sometimes and he'll be like, I don't want to go to bed, but he won't get out. It's so funny. So Valley's down the hall, and she said, rio, mommy said, be quiet. And I never said that. And I'm like, I have no idea what you're talking about. They're like, yelling at each other. Or if he does get out of the bed, which is not often, he'll move the ottoman over to Valian versus Cribs and get. Try to get them out.

[Becky Hater]

Are they in the same room?

[Karma]

Yeah, I put them in the same room. I'm like, so. So Rio and Verse will share a room eventually.

[Becky Hater]

I thought you switched that. That's why.

[Karma]

But. So there's two beds in Rio's room because they're only 11 months apart. But I'm having a really hard time separating the twins. Like, I can't bring myself to separate the twins.

[Becky Hater]

I'd be curious to know what people do, especially, like, at what age. Right. Like. Or do people often have, like, their boy and girl share a room?

[Karma]

There's legalities to it. Like, you really, really aren't supposed to have a boy and a girl share a room past a certain age.

[Becky Hater]

Really?

[Karma]

Yeah, it depends on the state, I think. But interesting. Boy, girl, sharing room. In Delaware, I think it's like, you're not supposed to have them. Oh, this one says, in Delaware, there's no specific state law forbidding a boy and girl sibling from sharing a bedroom. But child welfare. But child welfare guidelines generally recommend separating them once the child turns. Turns five. Okay, so. And they'll be separated way before then. I've always wanted to be able to provide a house that nobody has to share a room. So that's the goal when we move Whether it's in, depending on what the judge says, if it's in Delaware or out of Delaware, we will have enough where no one's sharing. That's my goal because my kids didn't ask for this and they all deserve privacy. So. Here's something that keeps me up at night as a parent. Our kids are the first generation growing up on ultra processed foods and we don't know what the long term effects are. So we're just beginning to understand them. And that's why Haya exists, to give parents a real solution in a market flooded with kids vitamins that prioritize candy like appeal over actual nutrition. And some children's vitamins on the market today contain up to 7 grams of sugar per serving and are stuffed with artificial additives and petroleum based dye. But Haya took the opposite approach with zero sugar and zero gummy additives. Just clean nutrition. But the crazy thing is that kids actually love them. They also love the experience of getting the jar at their door and getting to decorate it with stickers and then it's reusable so you can just fill it every single month. We love it at our house and we're talking about vitamin D, B12C, zinc, folate, all the foundational nutrients that support immune health, brain function, mood regulation, concentration and development of strong teeth and bones. And I absolutely love Haya because they deliver straight to my door. I don't have to worry about them at the grocery store on my click list. I don't have to worry about whether we have them in the house or not because they're always delivered straight to us. And here's something every parent needs to hear. Getting your kids to eat vegetables feels like an impossible battle. Right? You don't have to do that anymore because we have Haya to fill in those gaps. We've worked out a special deal with Haya for their best selling children's vitamin. Receive 50% off your first order. But to claim this you must go to Ham Karma. This deal is not available on their regular website. So go to H I y a H e a l T h dot com KARMA and get your kids the full body nourishment they need to grow into healthy adults. I'll figure out a way. If that means finishing a basement and splitting it up, I'll do it.

[Becky Hater]

Well, Elliot won't need like a full full scenario.

[Karma]

So there's a couple house options that I've come across that have pool houses with like an in law suite and I was thinking that maybe that could be for Elliot, because he's older and so even if. Because it's really on and I understand that some of this is out of touch. I get that some of the houses are five and six bedrooms. If there's six bedrooms, that works out because he would be able to be in the pool house. So that doesn't count. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, yeah.

[Karma]

But yeah. So anyways, that's. Those are the updates. Those are the updates.

[Becky Hater]

Wait, can you send me your zill listings?

[Karma]

Yeah, I.

[Becky Hater]

You like? I love looking at.

[Karma]

Tell me why I go. And I'll. I'm going to make a tik tok about this because that little of a son of mine, he's. I'm like showing him. Cuz Lincoln's all excited with me. I obviously have told him, like, this is not guaranteed. Like he knows it's not guaranteed, but he's like, let's look at houses, mom. Like, let's look here, let's look there. And so I'm showing him and then I, I tell Elliot, I'm like, look at these houses that we found. Like these are all within the budget, blah, blah, blah. And he's like, he comes across this one and I'm like, look at this one, look at this one. He goes, you're not classy enough to live here. I'm like, you little shit.

[Becky Hater]

It'd be your own kids.

[Karma]

It's like old money. Like it probably just needs a couple renovations inside. But he's like, you are not classy enough to live here. Like, fuck off.

[Becky Hater]

Wait, do you have it?

[Karma]

Yeah, yeah. Here, I'll forward you the email.

[Becky Hater]

Send it to me. North Carolina, so interesting.

[Karma]

I also really love Atlanta.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Karma]

So I'm like, that's not completely out of the question, but North Carolina also

[Becky Hater]

doesn't have state taxes. Is that right?

[Karma]

Oh, I don't know. I have no idea about that. But I will say checker in there. What do you know the cost of. The cost of living? The cost of living in South Carolina. Sorry, the cost of living in North Carolina in terms of gas prices and cost of living is cheaper than Delaware. So that's also helpful.

[Becky Hater]

They have just a. They have a lower state tax. They have 4.75 state sales tax versus what in Delaware? Delaware doesn't have sales state tax.

[Karma]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. I just forwarded it to the Becky one.

[Becky Hater]

I'll look at it in our break. I actually do. I would like to say something about this some. There's a lot of like slander on the. On the Interweb. First of all, we Stan, Ike.

[Karma]

We Stan Ike. Ike gets slander for. Ike does not deserve the slander he gets.

[Becky Hater]

Okay, let me. Let me set. Let me set something straight here. All right? I said this on I. When I jumped on and talked to Ray. This is kind of what I said there. Y' all know, everyone in this community knows I am not a yes person at all.

[Karma]

Becky tells me about myself. She calls me out. Not publicly, but she calls me out privately.

[Becky Hater]

Yes. So with the whole Ike situation, this is what I said on there. If you guys didn't listen. I also did not agree with any of the things that Kale was doing in her relationship. I really encouraged her to get back with us. Elijah. I was in support of that. I thought that that was what would be best for her. I questioned what Ike was coming into and, like, his authentic. Like, authenticity in wanting to be in a relationship. And I brought those concerns to Kale. Obviously, she doesn't give a shit what I say, but I do.

[Karma]

I do.

[Becky Hater]

No, I know. But I also was on everyone else's side. Like, this man shouldn't, like, just so willingly be able to, like, step in. Into this. But it's been a fucking year now, you know, over the next couple months. And, like, as things. And over the next year, I love him. He's like. He brings out such, like, a fun and happy side of you, and, like, that's what's important to me. And so I say this not to force everyone, like, he's here. Stop with the fucking slander. Right? Why are you gonna look at you. Because, like, not like, this is what we want for her. We want her to be happy. And everyone can agree with that. Let's all. Let's all have a clean slate, right? It's been a year. I was on your side with the. With everything. But now he's here to stay. And we love him, and we love who he is to you. And he's fun. Look at it.

[Karma]

He's so fun. He's such a good person. He helps me with so much.

[Becky Hater]

He does. He. He really. And, like, I was not. Not T. Mike, but now I am. So, everyone, let's all switch over, and let's all. Let's all welcome him with open arms and give.

[Karma]

Just give him a chance. Like, literally, just give him a chance. I saw on socials that people were gonna wear Team Elijah shirts on tour.

[Becky Hater]

Oh, my God, guys.

[Karma]

And it's like, can we be like, I still love Elijah as a human being. Elijah is I will never slander him. Elijah is a good person. So I think that good people can make bad decisions sometimes. And I will never discredit all of the stuff that Elijah has done. And honestly, I do think that he has made up, you know, made it up to me and to the kids by staying rock solid since we broke up. Like, if there was any time that I needed him or the kids needed him, he was there. So I just wanna preface that. Like, you can be team Elijah and also give Ike a chance and you can like Ike and still like Elijah. Like, that is. You're allowed to like both. We don't have to create a divide. No, give him a chance.

[Becky Hater]

He's a silly, goofy guy. Yeah. And he's just funny.

[Karma]

And like my kids. I don't care what y' all say. Like, my kids love him. Like they, and like they, they really like him. So it's one of those things where, like, I hope that there would be enough trust between the supporters and me. And I do appreciate the caution. Right. Like, maybe people are cautiously optimistic about him or they weren't sure about him or they weren't sure about his intentions. But like, I say all that to say give him a chance.

[Becky Hater]

I say all to say I also didn't give him a chance. And then I did. And I'm happy I did.

[Karma]

Yeah. And you again, you guys can still like Elijah. We get along with him. I never want to rock the boat with him. I, you know, things are great. He, you know, still looks out for the kids and we have a great co parenting relationship. So you can like both of them. It's okay.

[Becky Hater]

It's okay. And with that, let's find a little karma. Is it karma?

[Karma]

Is it, Is it karma or is it chaos?

[Becky Hater]

Actually, someone put a question in the group chat that I want to ask.

[Karma]

Okay.

[Becky Hater]

It's a long winded conversation, but. Or long. Like what's not long wind. Okay, so this is a. Is it karma? Is it chaos? Kind of. It's asking for opinion. It says, hey, y', all, I have a question. My email. 18 year old son has been in a long term, long distance relationship for most of high school. They see each other in the summer and occasionally during the year. She most recently told my son that she needed some space and time to figure out what she wants. He is absolutely heartbroken. Heartbroken and depressed because he put a lot of. He put a lot into their relationship. He wants to miss school and drive a thousand miles out to her to have a conversation with her in person. A million reasons. Both his dad and I told him. Not appropriate. How this is not appropriate. He says he's 18 and can do whatever he wants. But this could ruin his life. Driving for 16 hours through the mountains by himself, himself spending a ridiculous amount of money that he doesn't have. Not to mention just missing school for a week may cause him not to graduate. He's not thinking clearly and I don't know how to impress upon him that his frontal lobe isn't developed and he's making an impulsive decision. Being a parent of a teen is harder than a toddler. Any advice? Welcome.

[Karma]

This is tough because if he is 18, he technically can do it. But I also fully agree with her in that his frontal lobe is not developed. And so no matter what he decides to do is will this matter in 5 or 10 years?

[Becky Hater]

Can you remember? And you might even feel it now just cause you like, like remember when you're young there's a conflict in relationship and that. And all you want to do is

[Karma]

show up, you just need to be

[Becky Hater]

there and like there's nothing that's going to stop you from.

[Karma]

I remember my mom was living in a hotel in eastern Pennsylvania and I made her take me to Taco Bell at 2 in the morning to catch Joe cheating on me. And she did. And so like that's insane. Like to think back to that time, like I would also be where this mom is and be like, I'm sorry, but no.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Like how do you stop them?

[Karma]

You. You can't. But it's.

[Becky Hater]

Imagine he didn't graduate high school because of a girl. Yeah.

[Karma]

Oh, see, I would be like, you can go after you graduate. You can go after you graduate. Graduate first because if you don't, this will affect the rest of your life. But you can't reason with someone who's in that, who's in that emotional state. And I know because I was that kid.

[Becky Hater]

I know it's so hard in my mind. Like my solution and I know this

[Karma]

is not fly him out, like go

[Becky Hater]

watch him is like buy him maybe a cheap flight so he's not missing

[Karma]

school and go with him so he's not alone.

[Becky Hater]

And they're less than that people don't have. Like, wouldn't always have. That means like financially to be able to do that.

[Karma]

Should we do it? Should we pay for it?

[Becky Hater]

I mean I would, but this was a while ago, so I don't know if that's still like.

[Karma]

Cause I'm like, maybe we split the flight for them.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, I'd be down, like, to get

[Karma]

him there just so that he could graduate.

[Becky Hater]

Like, bring them both on the podcast

[Karma]

and figure out be like, hey, like, let's do this.

[Becky Hater]

But it's so hard because also, like, what's the likelihood of this being his person?

[Karma]

But like, also on the flip side of it, this is her. Like, girls don't say stuff like this until they, like, really need space. So, like, I don't know.

[Becky Hater]

And they're 18.

[Karma]

Oh, my God, my heart.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Such a shitty situation.

[Karma]

I'm so sorry. We're here for you in the best way we can be.

[Becky Hater]

I'd love an update too, if you're listening. If you could tell us what ended up happening, would love to know, but.

[Karma]

Oh, man, that breaks my heart.

[Becky Hater]

I know.

[Karma]

Well, good luck.

[Becky Hater]

Good luck. Well, that's all today, folks. Thanks for joining. Make sure to follow, like, subscribe wherever you find your podcast. Make sure to share with your friends to bring them over to listen to our craziness. This. Make sure to check out for the haters.

[Karma]

Yes, check out for the haters. She also has a series on there called Wallet Therapy. So if you're interested, her sister is a financial advisor.

[Becky Hater]

Financial coach.

[Karma]

Financial coach. So if you're interested in stuff like that, definitely go check that out. And don't forget to leave us a review on Spotify and Apple. We love to read reviews.

[Becky Hater]

Hell yeah, brother.

[Karma]

We should actually read them on the next episode.

[Becky Hater]

That makes me nervous.

[Karma]

Well, I'm gonna do it. Okay. Okay.

[Becky Hater]

Love you. Bye.

[Karma]

See ya. Okay, guys, we're back. You asked for it. And we're delivering. Killer is going on tour. We're super excited for the fatherless behavior tour. 23 cities, three countries, all in one summer. And you guys can check out tour dates and see if we're coming to a city near you on kalelowry.com. and if you want early access to information and announcements, head over to Patreon because you might get it before everyone else.

[Becky Hater]

At first, I didn't think it was real.

[Karma]

I woke up to this blinding light, and I was transported to another place. Pluto tv. Then I heard a voice. Come with me if you want to live. There were thousands of movies and shows, and they were all free. Truth is that it's just so Beautiful on Pluto TV.

[Becky Hater]

Free streaming of Terminator 2, Fringe Arrow,

[Karma]

the 100, and the X Files may cause excitement, loss of sleep, and sudden belief in extraterrestrials.

[Becky Hater]

No credit cards or alien encounters necessary. Pluto TV stream now. Pay.

[Karma]

Never. Hi, I'm Lauren, and I'M Chandler, and we're the hosts of Pop Apologist Podcast, a weekly podcast devoted to celebrity gossip,

[Becky Hater]

gossip, Hollywood deep dives, Real Housewives, drama,

[Karma]

and anything and everything. Taylor Swift. We're two sisters who make no apologies for our love of pop culture and the fact that a listers might mean more to us than each other. Join us on your favorite podcast app every Wednesday for pop Apologists. Pop Apologists, your new favorite sister and celeb podcast.