KILL TONY #774 - JOE DEROSA + MIKE FINOIA

Summary

Kill Tony #774 – June 30, 2026

Hosts: Tony Hinchcliffe, Brian Redban
Guests: Joe DeRosa, Mike Benoia
Location: Comedy Mothership, Austin, TX

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Episode Overview

Kill Tony #774 delivers another raucous night of live comedy with comedians—budding and experienced alike—taking their shot with 60-second sets in front of a live audience, the irreverent main crew, and panel guests Joe DeRosa and first-timer Mike Benoia.

The panel delivers sharp commentary, roasts, and genuine feedback, guiding amateur hopefuls and showcasing rapid-fire wit. Tonight’s themes: underdog hustles, odd jobs, resilient weirdos, frank honesty, and plenty of “too real” stories about sex, drugs, family trauma, and more. Notable highlights include raw debuts, road trip sacrifices, a dildomaker from Azerbaijan, crowd kisses, and guest/panel banter in classic Kill Tony tradition.

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Notable Segments & Highlights

Opening & Panel Introduction

[04:33]

• Redban and Tony hype the night and the Austin crowd.
• Panel guests:
  • Joe DeRosa: Veteran, recurring, known for sharp jabs.
  • Mike Benoia: NYC comic, Austin transplant, first panel spot.

Key Quote

"Tony: 'I'm going to have this guy whose eyes are way too close together pull the first name out of the bucket.' (06:13)"

Golden Ticket Winner: Mason Bird

[07:01]

• Opener with self-deprecating jokes about being fat, making Caesar dressing, and living with a lesbian roommate.
• Interview highlights:
  • Mason fell for his lesbian roommate, only to be friend-zoned.
  • Tells an “awkward family” story involving his sister’s surprise pregnancy.
• Memorable banter:
  • Joe DeRosa: “You could just listen to lesbians have sex all night and jerk off in the quiet of your own fucking room, and then you barge in—'I love you.' It just blew the whole fucking thing up.” (10:07)

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“One Dan Man Band”: A Bumpy Debut

[14:38]

• First-timer Dan riffs about meeting God through drugs, but delivers no jokes.
• Panel deconstructs why bombing was inevitable.
• Key moment:
  • Redban: “Let me tell you how crazy it truly is. I’ve been doing this show for about 10 years. Something happened when he was on…that I’ve never witnessed.” (17:30)
  • Tony: “Did you really change your life recently? …No, not really.” (19:13)

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Otis Hicks (El Paso)

[21:47]

• Jokes about being bullied, working at a sex shop, and being Black/Puerto Rican in El Paso.
• Gracious, funny, resilient; gets genuine praise from Joe for his structure.
• Panel riff highlights:
  • Tony: "What's the blackest thing about you?" (27:03)
  • Otis: "The blackest thing about me is that I had an alcoholic dad. I wanted him to leave, but he stayed. So that's how it became really funny." (27:09)

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Adam Lucky (Door Guy Regular)

[29:05]

• Tells rough-luck stories: wife left, lost gigs, lives with his mom, Kratom recovery.
• Sets kill; rewards grit and growth.
• Key quotes:
  • Tony: “You're crushing it… that's what it's all about.” (30:15)
  • Adam: “Things are the worst they've ever been, but I've been crushing it.” (30:58)
  • Tony: “You're still sweating like you're on pain pills, but we'll take your word for it.” (32:29)

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Clay McLaren: Cemetery Sexcapades

[35:42]

• Short comic, goes into meeting a hookup in a cemetery, drinks Listerine for courage, hits on women at Buc-ee's.
• Notable exchange:
  • Tony: “What app is this?”
  • Mike Benoia: “Uber Eats.” (42:40)
  • Panel: incredulous at his bizarre storytelling and nervous energy.

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Javi Bello: Fast-Talking Fat Jokes

[45:21]

• High-energy, overweight self-roaster, El Paso native, partner to Otis.
• Advised to slow down and embrace his natural charm.
• Notable quote:
  • Javi: “I make sketches about, like, Bean and stuff… that’s, like, legit what it is. The beans love me.” (48:20)
  • Tony: “What's the craziest thing that's ever happened to you in your life?”
  • Javi: “I got molested when I was like nine.” (51:47)
    (Panel pivots with dark humor and explanation about "homies" gumball-toy figures.)

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Dedrick Flynn: Weekly Regular Minute

[54:33]

• Expertly written advice about women undermining women, “giraffe neck bitch” joke.
• Gets into Smith's gifts from fans, slingshot weapons, roasting the crowd.
• Tony: “That is the greatest Hitler joke I've ever heard in my entire life.” (120:41)

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Brock White Lions: Oil Worker with a Past

[62:14]

• Strong jokes about pulling a “hot wife with gross feet,” “adopted” a woman from a shelter.
• Reveals: works offshore in oil; criminal past—DUIs, burglary attempts.
• Tony: “Out of all the DUI stories, I don’t think it gets better than—'oh, man, he’s gonna smell this alcohol, I gotta get rid of it.'” (73:27)

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Megan Knight: Therapy, Fitness, and First-timer Jitters

[77:35]

• First time, jokes about therapy with her husband, health coaching.
• Candid about using standup to one-up her husband’s goal.
• Panel: Encourages memorizing material and direct delivery.

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Layla: Azerbaijani Dildo Designer

[85:52]

• Jokes about “Just Do It” slogan, marriage breakup, suicidal friends.
• Reveals: sketches dildos professionally (“easier to design fantasy ones… you just fantasize”).
• Panel stuns:
  • Tony: “You are the designer of dildos?”
  • Layla: “Yes.” (90:56)
  • Real, vulnerable, gets strong commendation (“you’re going to kill it”).

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“Kiss Me” Segment: Mickey Genosi

[96:13]

• Cleveland comic, 9 years in, delivers a sandwich/food staple-themed run.
• “Kiss Me” segment: random audience woman (Step) comes up, gives Mickey his first “Texas kiss.”
  • Panel: “There was a lot of bodily fluids exchanged.” (101:20)

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Final Successes: Austin Gersten Schlager & Aaron Heltz

• Austin Gersten Schlager: (104:24)
  • Jokes about his own ridiculous last name, Hitler youth hair, living with grandparents.
• Aaron Heltz (Baton Rouge): (110:09–117:46)
  • TJ Maxx bathroom, trans porn, married-high-school-sweetheart sex, firefighter by day.
  • Panel adores him, dubs him “the edgy, clean Jeff Foxworthy” (115:17).
  • Tony: “Golden ticket!”—a show highlight.

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Closer: Pat O’Neill – The Real Deal

[119:00]

• One of the strongest regulars: best Hitler joke of Tony’s life (“Hitler was born on 4/20, and boy did he like smoking J’s”), TikTok/Muslims, “ghosts” pun.
• Earns full panel adulation for tight, boundary-pushing, original writing.

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Running Jokes & Recurring Themes

• Long Drives for Comedy: “The shorter the drive, the better the comedian is.” (34:24)
• Job Horror Stories: Security at tamale shops, sex shop employees, dildomakers, offshore oil workers, firefighters.
• Sandwich/Food Jokes: Redban’s “sandwich diet,” tortas, hoagies, Bucky’s, eating as identity (esp. with Javi).
• Kratom/Addiction Recovery: Mocked as “gas station heroin.”
• Meta/Inside Comedy: Panel offers consistent advice—shorten setups, eye contact, own the stage, memorize material.

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Notable Quotes (By Timestamp)

• Joe DeRosa (re: falling for lesbian roommate):

  "You could just listen to lesbians have sex all night...and then you barge in: ‘I love you!’ It just blew the whole fucking thing up." – (10:07)

• Tony Hinchcliffe:

  "These guys sign up every week...Instead of becoming bitter watching a show like this where people don’t prepare...these guys work all the time." (28:37)

• Layla (Azerbaijan dildo designer, on job):

  "Yeah. It’s actually easier to design fantasy dildos. Like, you don’t have to see any, like, dicks or anything. You just fantasize about them because you haven’t seen them in a long time." (91:34)

• Mike Benoia (to Aaron, after trans porn bit):

  "You're incredibly likable, and it's like, you've got that thing where it's like, I want to hang out with this dude after." (115:49)

• Tony (on Pat O’Neill):

  "That is the greatest Hitler joke I've ever heard in my entire life." (120:41)

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Memorable Moments

• Major travel sacrifices (multiple guests drove many hours to perform a 1-minute set).
• Wild crowd interactions: including “Kiss Me” segment with Mickey Genosi.
• Panelist roasts: Mike Benoia fits right in, Joe DeRosa is in top form.
• Offbeat professions: dildo designer, security for tacos, offshore oil, sex shop clerk.

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Takeaways for Aspiring Comics

• Be prepared—even a single minute can change your life (see: golden ticket winners).
• Embrace honesty and specific personal stories.
• Panel appreciates originality, smart joke structure, and authenticity.

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Final Thoughts

This episode crystalizes Kill Tony’s heart: a live pressure-cooker for unfiltered, raw, high-stakes, and often truly weird comedy. Whether panelists or hopefuls, everyone is roasted, mentored, and shown how laughter can survive, adapt, and sometimes—against the odds—just kill.

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Noteworthy Sets & Timestamps

• Mason Bird (Lesbian roommate, family story): 07:01–14:19
• One Dan Man Band (Bombed): 14:38–19:17
• Otis Hicks: 21:47–28:15
• Adam Lucky: 29:05–35:16
• Clay McLaren (Cemetery story): 35:42–44:57
• Javi Bello: 45:21–53:24
• Dedrick Flynn (Regular): 54:33–61:55
• Brock White Lions (Oil field & legal woes): 62:14–76:00
• Megan Knight (First-timer): 77:35–85:39
• Layla (Dildo designer/Azerbaijan): 85:52–95:33
• Mickey Genosi (“Kiss Me”): 96:13–103:12
• Austin Gersten Schlager: 104:24–109:49
• Aaron Heltz (Golden Ticket): 110:09–117:46
• Pat O’Neill (“Real Deal” closer): 119:00–124:00

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For links, tour dates, and merch, visit deathSquad.tv and TonyHinchcliffe.com. Panel guest plugs and further info at end of episode.

Transcript

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[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Hey, this is Red Band and you're listening to the Death Squad Podcast Network. This episode of Kill Tony and every episode of Kill Tony can be found at Death Squad TV, Apple, Spotify and anywhere you get podcasts. Check out tonyhenchcliffe.com for everything. The Golden Pony, Tony Hinchcliffe. You can also check out Shop Squad TV for Death Squad merch hats, mugs, whatever. Shop Squad tv. And now here's a brand new episode of Kill Tony.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Great news everyone. You have a chance at seeing Kill Tony live on November 13th and 14th in Las Vegas, Nevada. Get out of the stormy cold, blistering weather wherever you are and take a nice little weekend trip to Vegas to see two brand new live episodes of Kill Tony November 13 and 14. Tickets go on sale tomorrow morning, July 7 at 10:00am Pacific Time using the promo code [e-mail] that's Las Vegas, Nevada at the MGM Dolby Live Theater November 13 and 14. Tickets on sale tomorrow. The special pre sale code is KILL2SIX. Don't miss this opportunity.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Hey, this is Redneck coming to you live from the Comedy Mothership here in Austin, Texas for a brand new episode of Kill Tony. Get up for Tony Hitchcock.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Who's ready for the best fucking night

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

of their lives, huh?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

This one's for Brian Redband, ladies and gentlemen. And one more time for the best band in all the land, huh? Aren't they something? Raul Vallejo, Fernando Castillo, Carlos Sosa, Tres Leches, Michael Gonzalez, Nachos Belgrande, Matt Muhling on the electric guitar. And that is D Madness live in the fl. The great John B's is on the

road tonight, so we're leaving his stool empty in memory of him, even though

he's alive and well. Oh.

D Madness with extra room.

Fuck yeah.

Hell yeah. You're not missing much. D. You're not missing much.

Yes, yes. You are blind, all right. D Blind. I wish it was mute.

You know what I'm saying?

Hey, come on now.

[Show Assistant]

Let's go.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, we're going to have a

lot of fun tonight.

This episode of the number one live

podcast in the world is brought to you by Shopify. To overs and Saly. How exciting is it to have s joining our squad? And here's a little bit more from all the amazing sponsors that made this show possible for you here right now.

You guys ready to start tonight's show or what? Oh, my God. What an episode we have for you.

Ladies and gentlemen, one of a really two of the best comedians in the world. But one of my best friends is here with us and a first time panelist that we're very, very excited about. One of our very funny friends from New York and one of the newest

great residents of Austin, Texas. Two of the best. Make some noise for tonight's guest, Joe Derosa. And Mike Benoia, everybody. Hell yeah. Joe derosa. My buddy, Mike Benoia. Joining us for the first time, a new panelist. How exc. Exciting. And Joe DeRosa back again. A guy that people say I book too much.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Really?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Sky's got no other friends in the

world other than Joe DeRosa. Joe DeRosa. Joe Derosa.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

That is true.

[Joe DeRosa]

You might be my only friend. What do you think that says about me?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I.

[Joe DeRosa]

No.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Good.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

We're going to have some fun. Mike Fenoya.

[Mickey Genosi]

Welcome, welcome.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How are you?

[Mike Benoia]

Thank you, brother.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Everybody say hi.

Mike. Mike.

[Mike Benoia]

Hey, everyone.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's going to be a lot of fun. Mike, it's your first time on. Joe's done the show a thousand times. But Mike, you might not know. I'm going to catch you up. There's over 200 human souls that signed up for tonight's show. They get 60 seconds uninterrupted. You know their time is up and you hear the sound of a kitten. That means they have to wrap it up then or else they bring out the angry West Hollywood bear which interrupts their setting rudely. And then I conduct a nice interview with them and find out more about them. Anything can happen. Maybe it's a crazy person, maybe it's a genius. We found them all out of this bucket. I'm gonna have this guy whose eyes are way too close together pull the

first name out of the bucket.

They might have an operation for that, sir.

His wife is patting him on the back because she knows it's true. You look at those things, it's almost a fucking Cyclops. It's unbelievable, sir. Like, when you just did that. He just laughed like that. And his fingers were so close together. Oh, you're making me tear up.

Unbelievable. Unbelievable.

What my fan base looks like.

Look at these monsters that I've created.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Oh, boy.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

We're having fun here tonight. You guys ready to start tonight's fucking show or what? Well, we go wrangle that first comedian. We have a golden ticket winner who's gonna do a brand new 60.

We don't get to see this guy that often. We are excited that he's back.

Make some noise for the return of Mason Bird, everybody. Our first minute of the night. Bullet. Sega winner, Mason Burz.

[Mason Bird]

Life is like a box of chocolates. Fat people finish it a lot faster. I'm fat, but I'm working on it. Like, I learned how to make Caesar dressing from scratch the other day. What you do is you take Greek dressing and you stab it in the back 23 times. If you don't get that joke, you're fucking stupid.

[Mike Benoia]

Idiot.

[Mason Bird]

No, I live with a lady, you know, and she likes to do this thing when we argue. She likes to attack my masculinity. The other day she was like, be a man. Kill that bug. That's so unfair. I can't be, like, be a woman. Take care of me. Run your fingers through my hair. Cause that'd be a very inappropriate thing to say to your mom in your 20s. No, actually, I live with a lesbian, which is something I suggest you don't do unless you want to find out how much pussy you don't get. Dude, thank you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Fuck yeah, Mason Bird. Love it. Welcome back.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Thank you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Thank you, Mason. Burt, is that true? You really live with a lesbian?

[Mason Bird]

I used to. It was a. Yeah, got it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What was that like? Tell us about that.

[Mason Bird]

I fell in love with the lesbian and she didn't love me back. And then I moved to Texas.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And then you guys were dating?

[Mason Bird]

No.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You found a place that was a room that was for rent?

[Mason Bird]

No, I worked with this lesbian. She was like, we'd be great roommates. And I was like, yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Where were you guys working?

[Mason Bird]

At a bar. I was a cook. She was a waitress.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Did she think you were a lesbian?

[Mason Bird]

I mean, I get that a lot.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Did you have the beard back then?

[Mason Bird]

No.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah, I'm pretty. It's too bad.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, you look. Yeah, you would look like that without that.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah.

[Mike Benoia]

Mike, did you ever express your love to this Lesbian.

[Mason Bird]

Oh, yeah. It was so bad.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Early on or after you guys lived together?

[Mickey Genosi]

It was.

[Mason Bird]

Was. It was after we lived together and then.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's such a lesbian thing for even. It's so amazing you guys moved in

and then slowly but surely, so quickly.

That's such a lesbian thing to do.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah, I gotta. I got. I gotta work on that. Lesbians. Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So what happened when you told her you loved her?

[Mason Bird]

She told me she wasn't interested. And then she had sex with, like, two women that night, so.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So they would just be in the other room.

[Mason Bird]

Oh, yeah. It's just chaperone and finger blasting all night long. Dude, it's just LED lights under the floor. I'm playing Fortnite with the boys again.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah.

[Mike Benoia]

Everything's great.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Unbelievable.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You had a good thing going and you fucked it up, man.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, man.

[Joe DeRosa]

You could just listen to lesbians have sex all night and jerk off in the quiet of your own fucking room, and then you barge in.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I love you.

[Joe DeRosa]

It just blew the whole fucking thing up.

[Adam Lucky]

Yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

And by the way, I don't do this show too fucking much. I wasn't ready for that when I walked out here. I do the show too much with this gaggle of fucking goofballs you bring out here week after week.

[Mason Bird]

Oh, my God.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

It just hit me. By the way, this is how he invited me to do it today. He texted me. He goes, buddy, can you panel tonight? Everybody is out of town. Fucking dickhead.

[Show Assistant]

All right.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I thought I had Mr. Beast. For some reason, I had Mr. Beast and Mike Fenoya in my calendar the whole time. I texted Rogan, he's like, nah, that's

in July or something.

I'm like, oh, I put it in the wrong month.

Like, do you have a contact for Mr. Beast? So that's. You guys were that close to having Mr. Beast.

Instead, you have Mr. Least over here.

[Mike Benoia]

Mr. Beastiality.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You pig. Hey, Mason.

Bird's still here.

[Mike Benoia]

Mr. Feast.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah. I love it. I love it.

So how did the lesbian roommate situation end? I know there's so much other stuff we could talk about, but it's so intriguing.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah. So we worked together, and what was the job? I was a. I was like a sous chef. She was a waitress. She was actually the owner's little sister. And I threatened if she didn't move out, I would quit. And she moved out.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Probably didn't take much convincing.

[Mason Bird]

No, I helped her. I moved her couch out of my own apartment. It was. Yeah, I'm a nice guy. What can I say?

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing. What else is going on?

[Mason Bird]

Mason Bird, what's going on? My sister had a baby.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You're who?

[Mason Bird]

My older sister had a baby. She didn't know she was pregnant the whole time, but.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Whoa. One of those, huh?

[Mason Bird]

Yeah, Bigger, black. What are you gonna do?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Bigger lady.

[Mason Bird]

But, no, that's the thing is, I'm like, she's not fat enough for that to be the case. Her baby daddy's name is Blue. He's a black guy. I don't know Black and Blue.

[Joe DeRosa]

How did she not know she was pregnant?

[Mason Bird]

I think she's lying. Yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Wait, Blue?

[Mike Benoia]

The black man got pregnant?

[Mason Bird]

Yeah. He's 5 2. He's kind of adorable. He's been to prison.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Is this all true? I can't.

[Mason Bird]

Yes, so true.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How could your sister not know she was pregnant?

[Mason Bird]

I don't know. She had two kids prior. I think everyone hated her boyfriend. So you just lied the whole time? And then one day in January, she was like, you have another niece?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Is that the first black kid or the other two? Black. Two.

[Mason Bird]

Other two are black.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow. So it's a little gang of them, huh?

[Mason Bird]

Yeah.

[Mike Benoia]

Is that DNA test called Blue's Clues?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah. I love it.

They are your blood now. And your Crips.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah. Getting big dicks back in the bloodline. You know, I'm a big fan. I'm a big.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You guys are a very patriotic family. You have Red, your sister's White, and he's Blue. I love it, man. How to Beaver. Said hello to your little black nieces and nephews.

[Mason Bird]

The first two. I haven't met the new one yet.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Well, they're pretty cool. He'll be calling you any day now with his one phone call that he's allowed from prison.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

I'm sure.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hey, yo.

Hey, yo, Uncle Mason. Get me out of this.

I'm just kidding.

[Mike Benoia]

It's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Baby, they're not all misbehaviors, you know what I mean?

There's some good ones out there.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

All right.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I'm kidding.

I was pointing at you.

D Didn't get the laugh I thought it deserved.

[Clay McLaren]

But,

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Mason, thanks for getting tonight's show started for us.

Golden ticket winner, Mason Bird. We're moving to the bucket, ladies and gentlemen. So I didn't begin. May God have mercy on our souls as we find new people. Well, I can tell you for sure that this is the first time this guy's been on. I would know this name. So we're all gonna watch them together.

Remember, they signed up for this show. They've been waiting for hours for this Opportunity, Every single one of them.

So I say give it up for the first ever appearance of one Dan Man Band. Here we go.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Okay. If you do enough drugs, you will definitely meet God. That's a fact. And if you keep doing drugs, God will be like, what the fuck? The fuck are you still doing here, dude? Pick up all these cigarette butts. You got fucking empty beer cans everywhere. Empty fucking everything. Get your fucking life together, dude. Get your life together. Maybe get a job. I got a better idea. Why don't you go down, drive 19 hours down to kill Tony? I got a beat for you, dude. This came straight from God, by the way.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Holy shit, dude.

Stop, stop, stop. One Dan Man Band. All right. That's where you stop just making noises.

[Show Assistant]

Stop.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Almost done.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yes.

I want you to stop.

[Mason Bird]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

God, I see how you ended up in this place, in life.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's unbelievable. I bet you just. Is that what you were saying to

God when he was talking to you?

Okay.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Clean up the drugs.

Clean up the empty beers. Get a job.

Drive to kill Tony. What the going on, dude?

Are you Dan?

[Mason Bird]

Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, I'll call you Dan. How old are you?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

You know, Harder. Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How old are you?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

38.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What made you come down here tonight and do that?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

I am a fan.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You're a fan?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, but what made you do that instead of that?

Those are the fans.

That's where the fans normally go is out there.

What do you mean?

Well, you didn't do any jokes. You basically said that your. Your life was fucked up.

And then one day God said, get

off the drugs, clean up the beer, get a job, and drive to kill Tony. There's nothing funny that you said in there. Did you notice that on your 19 hour drive here, you didn't think about what you might say at all if it happened?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

I did. Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Have you ever done stand up before?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

No.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, so you just signed up randomly

without ever trying anything?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

No, I. I play music in Wisconsin and I play bars, and sometimes I. Sometimes I riff and I'm funny and I'm a fan of the show and I just, you know, I wanted to come down here and try it and. Yeah, I get this. I get it. I get what's going on, but I

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

get what's going on. It just hit him. Holy shit. I want to kill Tony. What the fuck? Wait.

[Mason Bird]

What am I doing?

[Mike Benoia]

I spent the whole weekend at the Sphere at Fish on Mushrooms. That's the most psychedelic thing I've seen all weekend.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Pretty wild.

I mean, Dan, it's absolutely incredible. That you would just jump right into this. As a fan of this is it really? Yeah, man. Yeah, dude.

It's a comedy show.

The whole point is that people are trying.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

I get that.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

There's other people. There's somebody. I feel like there's somebody over there tonight that signed up right alongside.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

It didn't go how I wanted.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, you go ahead, Dan. Oh, you go.

I bet it didn't. All right, Dan.

There you go.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Let me tell you how crazy it truly is.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I've been doing this show for about 10 years.

[Joe DeRosa]

Something happened when he was on, when he was doing his thing that I've never witnessed. He goes, I drove 19 hours down here.

[Lowe's Advertiser]

And you went.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I know normally you don't hear that because there's some laughter happening in the crowd, but at one point, I also think I said stopped breathing during that

set and unconscious chance to kill myself. Dan, you should know better. You should have written something or tried something. But insta, you know, let's talk about it. How bad was the drugs and the beer and everything? Did you really change your life recently? Simple question. No, not really.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

No.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, perfect.

There he goes, Dan, everybody. You get nothing. You get nothing.

There he goes, everybody.

That's fine. Just leave it there.

There he goes.

Dan, how about a hand for the lovely Heidi, ladies and gentlemen, Live in the flesh. I mean, what a specimen.

Am I right?

YouTube adds three pounds. So this is what she looks like in real life, everyone, just to let you know, one more time for the lovely Heidi, go to heidy regina.com. check out our new pod.

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[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, I pulled another name out of the bucket. Make some noise. Ladies and gentlemen, for Otis Hicks. Otis Hicks, everyone. Here we go.

[Otis Hicks]

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. How we doing? I'm a father. My daughter was getting cyberbullied. I didn't know what cyberbullying was. You know, growing up, I had a real bully. You know, I wish I would have got hit with emojis instead of getting hit in the fucking face. You know, I got teased before I even went to school. Somebody coming to me like this, otis, you're big headed, you're black, you're ugly. Your mom doesn't love you. Now go to school, son. My dad once started bullying you sensitive bitches. And growing up, I saw this 10 year old with like an iPhone. 10 years old. When I was 10 years old, I didn't get no iPhone. My dad just bought me an eye patch. He said, here, become a pirate. Here's a treasure map so you can find your real dad. My dad was an asshole. That's pretty much all I got. Thank you, guys.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Exactly a minute from Otis Hicks. Welcome, Otis.

Hell, yeah. Where are you from?

[Otis Hicks]

El Paso, Texas.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

El Paso?

Yes. You still live there?

[Otis Hicks]

Yeah, I still live there.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You born and raised there?

[Otis Hicks]

Born and raised there.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Chicken and tamales, man, I drove through that place. I'm gonna drive out here and holy, man, it's really something else.

[Otis Hicks]

It is something.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Nothing like it. Far from everything.

[Otis Hicks]

And I'm half Puerto Rican, by the way.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, I'm half black.

[Otis Hicks]

I said, yeah, yeah. Black, Rican, Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You'll take my wallet and then blow the money on gold chains.

[Otis Hicks]

Pretty much. It's pretty accurate.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Incredible.

[Otis Hicks]

Well, you made that joke during that roast with Puerto Rico and stuff. I mean, that's my family. But it is slightly accurate. It's A lot of garbage there.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Very accurate.

[Otis Hicks]

Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It was spot on. I wasn't calling the people garbage. It was an island made of garbage.

[Otis Hicks]

Thank you very much.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Very important.

Very important to not listen to the mainstream media.

[Joe DeRosa]

Joe DeRosa, how long have you been doing stand up?

[Otis Hicks]

For about 10 years.

[Joe DeRosa]

10 years? Yeah, man. Because your writing is. It's good, man. I really admired how you would start with one thing and then hop off of it into the next thing. Like, for instance, the eyepatch thing. Yeah, you got a laugh on eyepatch. And then you were like, oh, I can spring into. What does a pirate do? Treasure map. Real dad. Good, man.

[Otis Hicks]

That's helped me a lot. My dad being an asshole and a drunk helped a lot too.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's true.

[Otis Hicks]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Unbelievable.

[Otis Hicks]

It was.

[Javi Bello]

Yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Stereotypes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

So I'm guessing the mom's Puerto Rican, right?

[Otis Hicks]

Yes. Right on the head.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Absolutely.

[Otis Hicks]

Right on the head.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And Otis, what. What type of work do you do for a living?

[Otis Hicks]

Well, I'm a security guard, but the thing I was doing before, I worked at a sex shop.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, what were you doing there?

[Otis Hicks]

I was selling dicks.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That makes sense. I could see how your people would be good at that.

[Otis Hicks]

Yes, yes. That's what I was doing. Selling dicks.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing. So it was mostly women that would come in there. How would you feel when a dude like me would walk in and go,

hey, what do you got for this gaping ass?

[Otis Hicks]

I'll give you the 12 inch of the Darth Vader. I'll be like, there you go.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I love Darth Vader. Yeah, take me to the dark side.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I love it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Shoot your sith on my face.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Tony's like, but guys are allowed in there too, right? Guys?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah.

[Otis Hicks]

Yeah, Those rooms in the back and all that stuff.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Of course I've been there. I. Like I said I drove through once, had to stop off in the gay back room. You know what I mean?

[Mike Benoia]

How old did you say you were?

[Otis Hicks]

Me? I'm 34.

[Mike Benoia]

34. A security guard.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You're in good shape.

[Mike Benoia]

You look like Jog dmc.

[Otis Hicks]

Pretty much, yeah.

[Mike Benoia]

Run dmc?

[Otis Hicks]

Yeah, man, I work out.

[Mike Benoia]

You're in good shape.

[Otis Hicks]

Plus you work at a sex shop and you mop up manges. You know, you kind of get kind of strong at this.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing.

Now, where's the place you're working security now?

[Otis Hicks]

Sun City Security. It sucks, but I work it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Well, I mean, but what type of gigs? What are you standing in front of exactly?

[Otis Hicks]

Mostly, like, restaurants like Chico's Tacos and stuff like that.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Is there a Lot of misbehaving at Chico's Tacos.

[Adam Lucky]

Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What goes on there?

Give us an example of what type of mess you're cleaning up nowadays.

[Otis Hicks]

Basically, it's like tomato juice, tamales, and usually cholos fighting in the parking lot.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I have.

I have put together a lineup for you to pick the criminal out of.

It's the horn players over there. Which one of these people. Which one of these people commits the most crimes?

[Otis Hicks]

I'm going to say that guy.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, yeah, of course. Of course. Filled with testosterone. Carlos Sosa on the saxophone. Famously.

Famously. Nothing but trouble. Otis, what do you think is the most Puerto Rican thing about you? You're 50. 50. Or as you call it, fitty. Fitty. What do you think is the most Puerto Rican thing about you?

[Otis Hicks]

The Puerto Rican thing about me? I love mangoes, and I like drinking coconut juice straight out the coconuts. That's Puerto Rican enough, okay?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You call thick white women mangoes now? Is that the new term?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yes.

[Otis Hicks]

Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, Otis, my next. Next question. What is the blackest thing about you in this game?

[Otis Hicks]

The blackest thing about me is that I had an alcoholic dad. I wanted him to leave, but he stayed. So that's how it became really funny. Because of him.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What was his drink of choice? Was it Henny?

[Otis Hicks]

Of course. How'd you hit it on the head?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Because I study different races and cultures. A lot of people think this is

a game, you know?

[Joe DeRosa]

By the way, I would say his dad staying is the whitest thing ever.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah.

Amazing. Amazing.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Oh, I love it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So you've been doing it 10 years in El Paso.

[Otis Hicks]

Yes, sir.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Come to Austin just for this. Yes, Amazing. How long of a drive is that?

[Otis Hicks]

It's about eight and a half hours. But it was definitely worth seeing all you guys. I was. I got to come do it, man.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You got to live life.

[Mike Benoia]

Very funny, dude.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You did it.

Very funny.

We love it. It was amazing. Especially after a guy that drove 19 hours with fucking nothing at all. That was awesome, Otis.

Here's a legit black joke book for you, my friend.

In fact, I'm gonna give you The I love KC1.

There you go. Boom.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

There you go.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's like Otis making his Kill Tony debut, ladies and gentlemen. Gotta love it. Eight hour fucking drive paid off. Amazing. 19 hour drive. Eight hour drive. And now I know that this happens to be one of the funniest door guys here at the Mothership.

These guys sign up every week. You know what I mean? With this many names in the bucket, it's very hard to get pulled.

And I always love the ones that

sign up, you know, instead of. You know, you could easily become bitter

watching a show like this where people don't prepare. Now they're in front of millions of people.

These guys work all the time.

Very funny man with a brand new minute. He's been on the show numerous times before over the last five years. Make some noise for Adam. Lucky everybody. Here he is.

[Adam Lucky]

Pretty good day today. I had a homeless guy come up to me and go, hey, are you trans or retarded?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

All right.

[Adam Lucky]

You guys usually ask for a dollar, but I'll fucking take it, I guess.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Whatever, dude.

[Adam Lucky]

Put some fucking pants on first, dog before you gotta throw some heavy hypotheticals at me. Then I thought about like, trans are retarded. What's the difference?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Come on.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Where my re pubs at?

[Adam Lucky]

Come on.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Get them out of our bathrooms. Freak shows.

[Adam Lucky]

Nah, I want them in the bathrooms. Cause I like jerking off to watching them.

[Clay McLaren]

Shit.

[Adam Lucky]

So I like that. I like black people too. Sorry. I think they're chill. I have black friends. I lost one, though. I said the N word in front of him. He got pretty mad. He's like, you can't say that. I was like. But I was singing it in a song. He's like, yeah, but you were singing Happy birthday to me.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You got 10 seconds left if you want to do another one. We'll call off the cat and the bear. You're crushing it.

[Adam Lucky]

Yeah, I went to an all black high school. That was hard. Did not make the sports teams. I'll say that I made the swim team. Cause I could fucking swim.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Absolutely fucking hurt. I mean, holy shit. That's what it's all about, dude. That's what it's all about.

You see these guys on episodes from many years ago. The Vulcan days, if you will. And everything in between. And absolute shocking growth time and time again for the return people that we don't get to see all the time you're here in Austin, people get to do four, five, six, seven spots a night. Kind of like how New York used to be. Or maybe for some people is. But you're doing it, dude.

[Mickey Genosi]

That's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's unbelievable.

[Adam Lucky]

Yeah, no, my life has gotten like fucking awful, so I've gotten a lot funnier.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yep, that happens.

Trust me.

[Adam Lucky]

Things are the worst they've ever been. But I've been crushing it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So I don't need you wife.

[Adam Lucky]

I'm glad you're gone. I'm not. I miss her so much. Whatever. I get to live with my mom now.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Suck it, bitch. Spaghetti oats for breakfast.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Party time.

Your wife left you?

[Adam Lucky]

Yeah.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

When did this happen?

[Adam Lucky]

About a year ago.

[Brock White Lions]

It was.

[Adam Lucky]

It's pretty much the worst a divorce could ever go because she works at a comedy club, and I ran shows there, so I don't get to do that anymore.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah, it's all good.

[Adam Lucky]

SpaghettiOs for breakfast. Come on.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

We were having fun.

[Adam Lucky]

I'm not. Someone's gotta laugh.

[Joe DeRosa]

Which. Which club? Can you say or no? Is that too much?

[Adam Lucky]

I don't know. I mean, I've said it on the show in the past, so. I mean, it doesn't.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It doesn't matter.

[Adam Lucky]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

At all.

[Show Assistant]

Yeah.

[Adam Lucky]

No, I don't.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Why?

Were you gonna. Were you gonna make a pun or something?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

No, no, no. I was literally just curious what club it was, but then I was like,

[Joe DeRosa]

you probably shouldn't say that.

[Adam Lucky]

It's also fully my fault. She didn't do anything wrong. She rules.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What was it?

What would you have said if it

was called the Chuckle Hut, huh?

[Joe DeRosa]

I would have said, is she trans or retarded?

[Mike Benoia]

What's the difference?

[Adam Lucky]

I wish I could have tricked her in a sting.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I'll buy you goosebumps. Come on,

Adam.

[Show Assistant]

Lucky.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I love it. So what have you been doing to soothe the pain other than just pure standup, which it's obvious that you are in. You're in the zone.

[Adam Lucky]

I actually got sober, so I've been doing a lot of just, like, stuff.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah. You're still sweating like you're on pain pills, but we'll take your word for it.

[Adam Lucky]

This is the sweats to come after. After. I'm still in withdrawals. It's been nine months.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

[Adam Lucky]

Don't do Kratom. It hurts.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

Yeah. That's for real. We. We don't read Kratom ads. We probably lose out on what many would consider vast sums of money by not reading Kratom ads. It's a thing that people. Everyone that I've noticed that does it was addicted to something, and they're like, I'm on this new thing that's not addictive at all.

And then they continuously do more and more of it all the time. And they're like, it makes my bad memories get deleted.

[Javi Bello]

Like.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Like, I was addicted to that terrible thing.

No, I just do this.

[Adam Lucky]

It deleted my bad memories. And my wife.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing.

[Adam Lucky]

Not recommended.

[Mike Benoia]

It's the Zen of heroin.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

Yeah, it really is.

[Adam Lucky]

I was. I was doing the capsule. So they do have. They have, like, synthetic. Like, they take the out of it. That makes you hide. Like the powder is bad, but it's not like life ruining. But then they have these pills. You can take that. It's just like. They call it gas station heroin. Because that's what it is. Yeah, it was just fucking.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's brutal. Amazing. Oh, there's one fan in the back there.

[Mike Benoia]

So you do nothing now? Not even like psychedelics?

[Adam Lucky]

I've drank a couple of times since, but I mean, for the most part, pretty much nothing. I smoke cigarettes and that's pretty much it. Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So fun.

[Mike Benoia]

A lot of scratch off tickets, huh? A lot of lotto tickets and no other shit.

[Adam Lucky]

I have no money for that. I'm about to lose my car.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I wish.

I love it. Adam, what's your living situation like?

[Adam Lucky]

I'm really living with my mom right now.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, really? She lives here in Austin?

[Adam Lucky]

No, it's an hour and a half away.

[Layla]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

God, that sucks.

[Adam Lucky]

Yeah, it sucks.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

God damn, that's one funny. You just. You just work here and hustle a car.

[Adam Lucky]

I work here. I do Ubereats and that's pretty much it. Yeah, I do that pretty much every day. So I have money to see my daughter and that's it.

[Joe DeRosa]

So you gotta drive 90 minutes. You drove 90 minutes.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Take, by the way, Take notice everybody.

[Joe DeRosa]

The shorter the drive time gets, the

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

better the comedian is.

[Mike Benoia]

That is right. That is right.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Very obvious.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's a great point.

[Mike Benoia]

Whoever walked here is going to murder tonight.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

An hour and a half every day you're making that trip. Yeah, yeah, it blows. You know what we're going to do? Red band has an extra room in

his condo here downtown.

[Adam Lucky]

Let's do it, dude, come on.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Look at that face. Look at your mom. Don't you to want.

I'll suck you, dog.

[Adam Lucky]

I will suck you, brother. I got nothing to lose. I'll get gay.

[Otis Hicks]

You know what?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I'm ready upgrade you because Tony has a better room.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right.

[Joe DeRosa]

I would love to have you on

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

the secret show next time you come. That's a consolation prize if I've ever heard one. It's been a long time. Here's another big joke book, Adam. Lucky, ladies and gentlemen.

I mean, that's what it's all about.

Fucking and watching people get better. The only show that shows you that process in the history of comedy is here, Kill Tony. Brought to you by Shopify, Tacobas and Salie. And your next bucket pool, ladies and gentlemen. Goes by the Name of Clay McLaren, everyone. Here we go. Clay McLaren.

[Clay McLaren]

Damn, that is way too high for a Midget like me. Yeah, that. That's bad. So I. I had to down a bottle of Listerine just to get the courage to come up here. But don't worry, my shakes have almost gone. I had to stop by Buc EE's hit on some of the very fine fat Latina ladies. They are beautiful tortas, as they're called. Yeah, I gotta help myself to some pulled pork, if you know what I mean.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Clay McLaren]

Gotta get up in those beaver nuggets. But I like the black girls, too. Gotta get some of those burnt tips going. All right, I love you all.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Clay McLaren. Now, by my measurements here, I'm gonna

guess that you drove about 12 hours to be here.

[Show Assistant]

Close.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Really?

No, five.

What?

[Clay McLaren]

Five.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Five hours to be here. That's absolutely incredible. What type of crazy show is this? Everybody that wants to do comedy is moving here. Meanwhile, tonight's bucket paying off fucking gas bills over here. Making up for the war in Iran,

Joe DeRose.

[Otis Hicks]

Every.

[Joe DeRosa]

Out of every thing that you said that was disturbing, the most upsetting thing to me was. I also own that shirt.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, yeah, You.

[Mike Benoia]

Which one?

[Clay McLaren]

Damn it.

[Joe DeRosa]

That blue shirt?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Joe DeRosa]

Target GameStop. Yeah,

[Clay McLaren]

it was on the clearance rack at JCPenney's.

[Joe DeRosa]

Okay, well, you somehow downgraded from Target. I didn't think that was possible.

[Clay McLaren]

Yeah, it's hard to do.

[Show Assistant]

Wait.

[Joe DeRosa]

I have some actual comedy advice for you, though. You gotta move the mic stand. You can't stand behind it, man. You gotta move it to the side.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Take the mic out of there for now. Take it out and move it. Move it behind you.

[Joe DeRosa]

Move the stand.

[Clay McLaren]

I didn't want to.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

With you.

Move it behind you. Move it behind you. Okay, there you go.

[Mike Benoia]

It's your stage when you're doing it, man.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

There you go.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

First time around.

Electricity.

He's the Amish fat guy. Very exciting for him. Five hour drive in a horse and carriage to be here tonight. And those horses were working overtime, I'm telling you. That's a big boy. Big little Amish boy.

[Clay McLaren]

I like those tortas.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, my goodness.

Look at you. What are you, 21? 58. What are you, somewhere in between?

[Clay McLaren]

No, I. I turned 31 next week.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

31. Incredible. What do you do for work, Clay McLaren?

[Clay McLaren]

I work at a comedy club.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Incredible. Are you banging the owner lady? Are you, Clay? Look at you. You got a guilty faith.

[Clay McLaren]

I've come close.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Really? What's his name?

All right, stupid.

[Joe DeRosa]

You work at a club? A comedy club.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What's the name of the comedy club?

[Joe DeRosa]

I. No

[Clay McLaren]

punchline.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I was Going to ask if he was trans or.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, my goodness, what is the name of the club?

[Clay McLaren]

Punchline Houston.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right.

Good answer. Clay, what do you do for fun? You seem like the kind of guy that has hobbies galore.

[Clay McLaren]

I don't know about galore. You know anything that a regular Amish dude would do? Fishing. It's been a couple years, but I used to go hunting a lot.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hunting for what?

[Clay McLaren]

For all the right things.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

Extra creepy answer.

[Show Assistant]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Clay, what's your love life like? Are you out there just smothering girls?

[Clay McLaren]

I mean, when I'm not hitting on women and berating them@buc EE's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What do you mean?

Are you being serious?

Stop trying to be funny. I need real answers out of you, Clay.

No, you're nervous.

I'll make you fucking nervous.

[Clay McLaren]

Yeah, yeah, I'm nervous as. But no, no, I. I was talking to a girl@buc EE's today.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What? What did you say to her? Give me your opening line. So what was she doing? Like, looking at the different nuts and stuff, like. Right, right. Something like that.

[Clay McLaren]

No, no, I noticed that she had an engagement ring on. I said if you ever want to get re engaged, you know, just hit me up.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That was your line?

[Mike Benoia]

Yeah. Re engaged?

[Clay McLaren]

Yeah, just overtly forward.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Really?

[Mike Benoia]

And then what?

[Clay McLaren]

And then she looked at me like the way you're looking at me now.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah.

[Joe DeRosa]

And something tells me you were shaking like this when you said it.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yes.

[Mike Benoia]

Yes.

[Clay McLaren]

Actually, I was a lot more chill.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Did you have anything in your hands at the time? When I'm in Buc EE's, my hands are always full. I end up having to grab a basket, but I do it too late. What did you have in your hands, Clay McLaren?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Nothing.

[Clay McLaren]

I just went in to take a piss.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So it was extra creepy then because you're just a guy standing there with nothing, no purpose at all in a

world where everything is fun. I mean, I can't stop buying things there. I want to buy everything at a Buc EE's. And you're just empty handed, contributing nothing at all. Hey, you want to get re engaged?

Well, I see you're the only woman who here that's promised to another man.

[Mike Benoia]

But just an ether rag.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Oh.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Welcome to the amazing world of Clay McLaren.

[Clay McLaren]

Yeah, well, if there's any tortas in the audience.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, my God.

[Show Assistant]

Dude.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Clay, stop it. Stop it. Hey, Kias or tortoise?

No, stop it.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Very good. Very good.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You're making red band.

[Mike Benoia]

I'm gonna put you back in the kiln.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You're gonna make red band, Have a low blood sugar attack.

Stop.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Hey.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Stop talking about nuts and tortoise Malka.

Clay, when's the last time you were with a woman? When's the last time you had sexual intercourse with a woman? I have to absolutely know. I can't imagine in my head.

You still have a lot of her

pubes stuck in your beard. I can tell you that right now. A few months ago, yeah. Okay. Where'd you meet this gal at?

[Clay McLaren]

In a cemetery.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, so how long did it take you to dig her up? What do you mean you met a girl in this cemetery? You gotta paint the picture for us

a little bit, Clay. You go straight to the craziest answers ever.

[Clay McLaren]

I hit her up on an app. She said, I'll suck your dick in a cemetery.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What app is this?

[Mike Benoia]

Uber Eats.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Mike benoia has arrived.

To the Kill Tony universe. What app is.

[Clay McLaren]

Was either Bumble or Tim. Yeah, one of those. Yeah. I almost slipped up.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hey, that's a list, right?

[Joe DeRosa]

Definitely wasn't Bumble. That's the one where the girl has to message you first.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Clay McLaren]

So it was definitely Tinder.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It was Timber. The one where you get a.

[Clay McLaren]

In a grinder real fast.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Whoa. Okay. No play.

This lady out of nowhere said that she wants to suck your dick in a cemetery. Then what happens?

[Clay McLaren]

Got my dick sucked in the cemetery.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow. Quite the storyteller, ladies and gentlemen. Unbelievable. Could have said anything in the world. Jumps right to the end of the story. Very Tarantino esque, telling you the end first. And now let's find out.

Did you have to open a gate? Did you drive right in?

Did you.

[Clay McLaren]

No.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Did you do it in the parking lot?

[Clay McLaren]

It was open. There's like a driveway.

[Joe DeRosa]

So you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Did you do it in your car?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, so she. It was kind of like a driveway, open gate in a parking lot. And then she got out of her car and came into your car. Was she already there?

Just standing?

[Clay McLaren]

I'm not sure if I'm breaking any laws right now.

[Mike Benoia]

You already did.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, well, no, I. Definitely not.

[Clay McLaren]

She hopped in.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So you name her name and her address. You're not breaking any laws.

No one believes you, by the way. So you're okay. Out of all the sex stories ever

told, you getting your dick sucked in a cemetery?

Almost impossible.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

By the way, they got security at the taco place where the other guy works. Nobody's guarding the gates of this fucking cemetery to stop some abomination shit like this from happening. What the fuck is going on.

[Clay McLaren]

It's where my great grandmother is buried.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Whoa,

[Audience Member / Panelist]

whoa.

[Mike Benoia]

This is turning into a Goosebumps book.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Jesus.

[Clay McLaren]

No, this is a true story.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So, Clay McLaren, I'm gonna get you out of here. You are the. You are the first person leaving with a medium sized joke book.

Congratulations, Clay. A big victory. A five hour drive for Clay McLaren. A night of long drives. Ladies and gentlemen, an hour and a half. Being the closest bucket pool out of four tonight, here's number five. Ladies and gentlemen, make some noise for Javi Bello. Javi Bello. Let's go.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Howdy.

[Javi Bello]

How you doing tonight? I don't care. Yeah, let's do this. I got a minute. So, as y' all can see, I'm clearly a bottom. Oh, I see bottoms here tonight. Fuck you guys. Dude, I see a lot. No, but I gotta be a bottom. I'm too fucking fat. Probably gotta be a bottom. Imagine me being on top my girl, she's like 4ft 5. If I'm on top of that bitch and my arms gonna be out, that bitch is dead, dog. She's dead. Dude, I'd rather be up here telling you guys jokes instead of asking you to help fund my gofundme for that bitch. I'd rather do that. I'd rather do that, bro. It just sucks being fat. It sucks. For example, I bought a new belt. I bet you can't see it. Titties, titties, titties. Can you see my fucking belt? I doubt it. I got a new belt. I'm serious. I'm not lying, blue eyes. I'm not lying, bro. I'll never lie. Ariat. Brand new. Just bought this shit at a Bucky's. Just bought this shit on the way over here. Hate that shit, bro. No, but I actually feel grateful that I'm doing this, dog. Cause I don't do this when my girl blows me. I swear to God. And it's heavy. So she better make me come fast, bro. Otherwise I dropped it. And slapper. No, no, you hurry up.

[Mike Benoia]

You.

[Javi Bello]

You come. You make me come faster.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Javi Bellon, ladies and gentlemen, with this full set. Welcome, welcome. How are you?

[Javi Bello]

Good, brother.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah.

[Javi Bello]

You look sexy in person. Holy.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I wish I could say the same about you, Javi.

You are a big, nasty boy, you

[Javi Bello]

know, like my wife, too.

[Brock White Lions]

Love it. I love it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Let's check in with the boys here.

[Joe DeRosa]

Slow down.

[Javi Bello]

Yes, sir.

[Joe DeRosa]

No, no, slow down a little bit.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Eating on, eating.

Slow down.

[Joe DeRosa]

Your too, but no slowing down. Slowing down will help you in different ways. It'll help the audience understand what you're saying a little better.

[Javi Bello]

Oh, yeah.

[Joe DeRosa]

It'll help you not spill chili all over your shirt.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I mean, it's unbelievable.

[Mike Benoia]

That's what I was going to say.

[Javi Bello]

Barbecue, buddy. It's barbecue.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Jesus Christ.

[Javi Bello]

I went to Terry Blacks.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

My.

Yeah, we love Terry Black.

[Javi Bello]

I got up NFL. I took a nap before I got here, bro. Terry Black's it hard, bro.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah.

[Mike Benoia]

Real talk, though. Bring a show shirt.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah. Always wear black.

[Javi Bello]

Now the fatty's got my back. Homeboys.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

There's a couple out there taking up multiple seats.

Javi, what part of.

What part of San Antonio are you from?

[Javi Bello]

I'm from El Paso, which is San Antonio without.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Whoa, another El Paso guy.

[Otis Hicks]

Another one?

[Javi Bello]

Otis was the first black guy you saw in El Paso. He's the only one.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You guys drive here together?

[Javi Bello]

No, we're touring right now.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You're touring?

[Brock White Lions]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, okay. So you guys are just swinging through Austin, doing other shows, right?

[Javi Bello]

Yeah. I gotta show the Vulcan later if you guys want to go. I promise I'll talk slower, and then we'll have a better shirt. I promise.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, Javi. Amazing. How long you been doing stand up?

[Javi Bello]

Four years this year.

[Show Assistant]

Four years.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What else do you do?

[Javi Bello]

I make sketches about, like, Bean and stuff.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Huh.

[Javi Bello]

That's, like, legit. What it is. A lot of people relate to it, and it's dope.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And you make a living doing that?

[Javi Bello]

Yeah, dude. It's awesome. The beans love me.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Very good. Are you getting bigger? Like, are you. Where's your weight?

[Javi Bello]

Now? I'm comfortable now that I'm talking to you. I'm comfortable, so I just let it out.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I love it. Have you ever zipped that vest before?

[Javi Bello]

Never.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Doug, can we try?

Can I get a drum roll, please?

Let's try it, honey.

[Javi Bello]

Help. I need help.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

No, come on, Hobby. Just try. I want to see what it looks.

[Javi Bello]

All right.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Ready if I come?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I'm hobby.

[Adam Lucky]

Do it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Just do it, Hobby.

Hold on.

Give me a little trombone here. Oh, my God. He's trying to suck it in. This is epic, yo. Hell, yeah. Can you breathe?

[Javi Bello]

No, I got that.

[Mike Benoia]

Unzip that thing. You're going to take someone's eye out.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, my goodness gracious.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

That was the back of a man

[Joe DeRosa]

that has never zippered anything ever.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah.

That vest was working extra car hard.

[Mike Benoia]

Does car heart know that you're.

[Otis Hicks]

No.

[Javi Bello]

Dude, I'm the most unemployed car hardware ever, dog. I'm committing stolen valor right now, bro. I got true. It's the only thing that Fits clearly, dog. Yeah, the best club.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Barely.

[Javi Bello]

Barely hanging on, but they do Carhartt sponsor me.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's amazing.

[Joe DeRosa]

Dude, you sound like an even more coked up Uncle Laser.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, it is.

[Show Assistant]

Hey.

[Javi Bello]

Falling asleep from the barbecue. I had to do a blow. I had to do a bump before I got on here, dog.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Did you really?

[Javi Bello]

No.

[Show Assistant]

No.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay.

[Javi Bello]

No.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Okay.

[Javi Bello]

In your eyes. That's all it is.

[Show Assistant]

Why?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay. Do you ever. Do you ever put your finger in between that neck flap there? You ever finger that?

[Javi Bello]

I get all the grease out and then just. Leftover food, dog. Leftover barbecue.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell yeah.

[Javi Bello]

That's why I spill a lot.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What's your love life like?

[Javi Bello]

I'm with a lady with 12 years. Female. Sorry, bro. Female.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right.

[Javi Bello]

12 years. Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay. What does she do for work?

[Javi Bello]

I just got her out of work. She used to do. She was like a JCPenney. But I just. I make enough money.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Penny, our second JCPenney.

What?

[Mike Benoia]

The JCPenney's was still.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

There's like two J.C. pennies.

That's for JCPenney call outs this episode. Fun fact. If you place a bet. If you place the bet today on DraftKings, that JCPenney would be said four times. If you bet $1 on that, you just won $17 million.

[Aaron Heltz]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Dude, that is the odds of four J.C. penney references happening in one episode. Hobby. What's the craziest thing that's ever happened to you in your life?

[Javi Bello]

This man is awesome.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Other than this.

[Javi Bello]

Oh, yeah. I'll give you a good one. I knocked out a guy on tour. I was peeing next to him and he didn't want him to be next to me because he thought it was gay. It was an awesome too.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What'd he say?

[Mike Benoia]

I didn't hear one of those.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That all became one Note.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Black helicopters.

[Mike Benoia]

I think that was the first ever stand up heart attack that I just woke up.

[Javi Bello]

I fought a guy. I had a show in Austin and I was peeing and he didn't want to pee next to me and he got mad and he just punched me because I didn't finish fast enough. I drink a lot of beer.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Punched you?

[Javi Bello]

Yeah, because he pushed me. So I punched him, fell asleep and I was like, yeah, I got that. I didn't know I had it.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Wow.

[Javi Bello]

I didn't know I had that. And yeah, one guy, the Jack guy here.

[Megan Knight]

Yeah.

[Javi Bello]

I mean I might have a lot more, but I'm nervous, dog. I don't want. I don't know how to think about. I got molested when I was like nine.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, let's talk about that.

[Javi Bello]

He was a family friend and then, and then he bought me afterwards. So I didn't give a. I was

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

just gonna say my next question was is how does food connect to this? Did he literally give you candy afterwards?

[Javi Bello]

No, it was Hot Wheels and the little homies. If there's Latinos out here, they'll know the homies. Yeah, he bought me a pack of 12.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Do you have a mic? Michael, can you explain what a little homie is for us? This is our senior Latino correspondent, ladies and gentlemen. So our little action figure.

[Javi Bello]

I think I'm blocking them. Hold on. I'm sorry.

[Adam Lucky]

Check, check.

[Commercial Announcer]

Can you hear me?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

[Mickey Genosi]

So little homies are little tiny action figures of actual cholo people.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Like cholos?

[Show Assistant]

Yes.

[Mickey Genosi]

Little tiny.

[Javi Bello]

Yeah, little cholos. Yeah.

[Joe DeRosa]

And this, this is a true story.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Our senior fat correspondent was jumping in. In my ear. Yeah, it's a little action pe.

[Joe DeRosa]

The.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

The.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

They.

[Joe DeRosa]

They were the supermarket in my neighborhood where I grew up, they had homies in one of those machines as the quarters. Like the gumball.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, dude, that's right.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

And there was a homie that was in a wheelchair.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Really?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Cuz he had been.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You know what? I'm going to give him a golden ticket right now. Where is this little homie Me?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Okay. Shot in a drive by apparently.

[Joe DeRosa]

And I spent $10 in quarters to get the wheelchair homie.

[Javi Bello]

The homies were very progressive back then before it was popular. Hell yeah. They loved everybody.

[Mike Benoia]

Did they come with little accessories like pineapple soda and.

[Javi Bello]

Oh, we didn't have that much money, dog. It was just a. The pack of 12. They had a little car, a little hot wheel car. Badass. I just stayed quiet cuz it was dope.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh my goodness. Amazing hobby. Well, congratulations. You did it. You.

You got a big.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Oh yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

There you go, pal. Hobby.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Thank you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Balon. Doritos and burritos. Javi Balon has arrived to the Kiltoni universe.

[Commercial Announcer]

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[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Best thing that's ever happened to you financially.

Go easy.

[Mickey Genosi]

Sold my car on Carvana. Amazing offer, really.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I hit 200 on a scratcher.

[Mickey Genosi]

Did the scratcher come to your house and hand you a check?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

No.

[Mickey Genosi]

How many scratchers did you hit? To get that, I hit a button on Carvana.com once.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, that's fair.

[Mickey Genosi]

It's like the lottery, except you always win.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Not like the lottery at all, actually.

[Mickey Genosi]

Exactly. Inexplicably good offers worth bragging about. Sell your car Today on Carvana.

[Aaron Heltz]

Pick up.

[Mickey Genosi]

These may apply.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, ladies and gentlemen, let's switch up.

Let's switch up the tone a little bit in here, everybody.

We have a regular who does a brand new minute every single week.

It's diabolical to do that in your

career publicly in front of millions of people. Very tough job to write a new minute every week, ladies and gentlemen. He was once the dark storm of Atlanta. Now he's the dark storm of Austin, Texas. This is a brand new set by Cedric Flynn, ladies and gentlemen.

[Mason Bird]

Guys,

[Show Assistant]

no.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I love you guys.

[Show Assistant]

Life advice, relationship advice. If you love a girl. If you seriously love a girl, stay away from the girls that don't like her. Cause they'll pick out a flaw to ruin your entire relationship. Last year, I thought I was gonna marry this girl Brittany. And I went to my best friend Emily, and I was like, I think I wanna marry Brittney. And she said, ugh, you mean that giraffe neck bitch? I was like, she ain't got no. She ain't got no giraffe neck. But I. So I went to Instagram immediately and I started scrolling and I was like, damn, she do got a long ass neck. She even got, like, freckles on her neck. It look like the spots like on a giraffe. She do be deep throating, you know what I'm saying? Like, she just let Effortless. Why she eating salad in every photo? Bitch a herbivore. Also, this is just one picture,

[Mason Bird]

which

[Show Assistant]

it don't get to you, right? Then you kind of barrel it inside you, and then, like, you get into a fight and it come out and she like, I don't understand why you

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

can't take out the trash.

[Show Assistant]

I'm like, I don't know why I'm dating a zoo animal.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Brittany, you know what? You've been a real bitch since you lost your job at Toys R Us,

[Show Assistant]

but. Cause, Jeffrey, Toys R Us is real good. You know what I'm talking about? So we broke up. That's my time. I love y'.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

All.

[Show Assistant]

Thank y'.

[Mason Bird]

All.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Dedrick Blake, 1 minute, 53 seconds. Doing more than he has to.

Almost every set. Dedrick, you've done it again. Very, very funny. Millions of people watching. How do you feel?

[Show Assistant]

I feel so fucking good. I have it Feel so. Thank y' all so much for coming and loving me and all the nice shit y' all sending me online. Y' all giving me gifts all the time. I don't even ask for them. That's how me and Mike ended up with these bobcat tales from this street witch.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, my God.

[Show Assistant]

I get slingshot sent to me. I get. They got an automatic slingshot they're sending to me. It's got, like, a clip, and when you put it in, it just, like, you can just keep fucking a nigga up.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, wow.

[Show Assistant]

Just fuck a nigga up. That's how I can't.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, boy.

[Show Assistant]

Don't do crime around me. Order boneless wings if you want to. One in the neck, Nigga, grow up. You know what I'm talking about, dumb.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I know exactly what you're talking about. I did, however, look out at some white people in the crowd looking very confused. This woman in glasses here, now smiling.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Now turning it on.

[Show Assistant]

Uncross your arms. I don't like your energy. All right? Just have fun. We're talking about slingshots.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Grow up.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Looks like the type of lady that probably marched in a Black Lives Matter rally, but now that there's an actual black man in front of her, just looks confused and scared at the same time. Seems like it would really hurt if

you shot someone in the neck with a slingshot.

[Show Assistant]

I wouldn't personally do that because, like, I think. I think passive.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Fuck you, dude.

Yeah.

[Show Assistant]

I'm just playing. I love you, but, like, your attitude. You can cross your arms. I'm still. You paid to be here. I'm paid to be here.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That is true.

[Show Assistant]

I'm just playing.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I don't like that.

[Show Assistant]

I don't like. That's not me. I don't know who that was. I don't know who that was. That is not me.

[Joe DeRosa]

Hold on. Hold on. We're supposed to get paid to do this.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah. No.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

What the fuck?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

No way.

[Otis Hicks]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

No way, Jose.

[Mike Benoia]

No shit.

[Show Assistant]

Like an age thing on there. He only pays like the young comics.

[Aaron Heltz]

Oh.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, sorry. We always talk shit.

[Show Assistant]

We're not doing it. We promised we weren't gonna do this. I'm sorry.

[Joe DeRosa]

I know.

[Show Assistant]

I don't know who this is coming

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

out of my body. I don't know what I'm doing.

[Joe DeRosa]

You get real mean.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I'm not David Lucas. I am not. I don't do this.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

We need an exercise.

[Show Assistant]

I love your new glasses. Your outfit looks amazing. Your skin is glowing. Are you doing karate?

[Audience Member / Panelist]

You look good.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Are you doing karate?

[Joe DeRosa]

I love that you got fronts put over crooked teeth.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You didn't get teeth straightened out.

[Joe DeRosa]

You just said.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Nah, just put it the way they are.

[Show Assistant]

You don't have back teeth, Joe. I didn't know that. Your shit is rotted out in the back. And we've been talking about it.

[Joe DeRosa]

Don't do this.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You're doing it. I don't want it. An hour from the D. Oh, D Madness is back. Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I brought in a special guest referee for this battle. D Madness, ladies and gentlemen.

[Show Assistant]

Don't me up, Joe. You. We're. We're friends now.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

This is what he does. You get you. He's going to be blacked out at the bar an hour from now, going,

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

you know I love you, dude.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You know I love you, man.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I'mma do it.

[Show Assistant]

I do do that,

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

by the way.

[Show Assistant]

That's.

[Mason Bird]

That's.

[Show Assistant]

That's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That is true.

[Show Assistant]

That's 100%.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That will.

100% that will be happening.

[Mike Benoia]

Go to Mitzi's.

[Show Assistant]

I'll apologize to Joe in front of everybody. That's there.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That do be happening with the great Dedrick Flynn. We always have fun wrapping it up at the end of the night. What else is going on, Dedrick? Anything else? Crazy bitch.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I'm going to la.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yes, we are. We going through the killed Sonny in la.

[Show Assistant]

I got shows coming up up in San Antonio, Houston, Orlando, Miami.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

And then I'm headlining the festival in Okinawa. Japan, Daddy.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Worldwide.

[Show Assistant]

Wow. I'm getting arrested in Japan.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow, that is amazing.

[Show Assistant]

Trying to join some fucking ninjas and shit.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's a real gig you're doing.

[Show Assistant]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

When are you going to Japan?

[Show Assistant]

End of May.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All throughout June.

[Show Assistant]

I'm doing Hansei's Hat. It's his festival out in Okinawa. He asked me to come headline it, and I said yes before he could stop because I really want to go to Japan. My nephew, actually, my nephew's getting born in Japan from my adopted Japanese sister, Gracie. She's having her baby in Japan.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So the day I land, I get

[Show Assistant]

to go meet my new nephew.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What's Gracie's Instagram? Red band. Red band.

[Show Assistant]

White dad.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

White dad.

[Show Assistant]

She's. You watch yourself before. I love you harder. All right.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I love you guys.

[Show Assistant]

See, I'm not even roasting anymore. What am I doing?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You're amazing, Dedrick. We love you, too.

Great.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Love you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Great new 1 minute, 53 seconds from the great Dedrick Flynn. He makes it look easy. He does this every week. Some of these people, this is their first time on this or that, they wait for years. Some people 10 years.

Some people 5.

[Commercial Announcer]

This, that's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

He has to do it every week. Unbelievable. Like your next bucket pool. We will figure out what's going on here as we meet them all together.

Make some noise for Brock White Lions, everybody.

[Otis Hicks]

Yeah.

[Brock White Lions]

What the is up, Austin? I got a hot wife, believe it or not. And if you don't believe it, then you. I pulled it off. And you can too. Despite my average looks, below average bank account, I got a hot wife. You just gotta follow these easy tips. Tip number one, find you a gorgeous girl with gross feet. My wife's feet are disgusting, y'.

[Otis Hicks]

All.

[Brock White Lions]

But I suck those toes. I know they ain't the only thing between me and some ugly bitch in open toed shoes. Tip number two, makes people uncomfortable, but it's the best tip. I'll give it to you anyway. Everyone's bragging these days. They got their animal from a shelter. Adopt, don't shop. I got my woman from a woman's shelter. I don't get enough credit for that. Thank you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Such a funny joke there at the end. Somehow I never heard anything like that.

That's incredible. How long have you been on stand

[Brock White Lions]

up in like maybe two and a half, three years.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Nice.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Where at?

[Brock White Lions]

Lafayette, Louisiana?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell yeah. What do you do for a living out in Lafayette?

[Brock White Lions]

I work offshore. So I don't. I mostly live out there. And there's no open mics.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What are you doing? The oysters, the shrimp. What do we got out there? What type of stuff happening out on the bayou now?

[Brock White Lions]

I'm getting. Love it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Let's go. And when I say let's go, I mean G, E, A, U, X.

You know what I'm saying?

[Aaron Heltz]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I don't know.

[Brock White Lions]

Oh, you just got to give me chills, dog.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I love it.

[Brock White Lions]

I work in the oil field. I work offshore, so I get oil for the cars.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Chicken with Mike Fenoa here.

[Mike Benoia]

You haven't blinked the whole time up here and you've got.

[Brock White Lions]

That's kind of our thing as part of our culture, we don't blink a lot.

[Mike Benoia]

What culture is that? Zombie.

[Brock White Lions]

I was just trying to not be phased, actually. I'm freaking out right now.

[Mike Benoia]

You killed it, bro.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's the truth. Wait, what?

[Brock White Lions]

I normally like to blink. I blink, dog.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I swear.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

But you got what?

[Brock White Lions]

Every time you blink, I'm a blink.

[Mike Benoia]

You got eyes like manhole covers.

[Mason Bird]

Thank you.

[Brock White Lions]

My mama used to say that, bro.

[Mike Benoia]

What does I know? I taught her it.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah,

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Joe deros.

[Joe DeRosa]

What? What does that. Why did you keep saying I work offshore?

[Brock White Lions]

It means I work not on land, but in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, there's oil. There's oil under the water too, Joe. There's oil underwater as well.

[Mike Benoia]

We're on shore.

[Brock White Lions]

Hey, you know where the shore is?

[Mike Benoia]

Offshore, off the shore. Like say this is the shore. We're here, he's there.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Hey.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Well, let's just say we now know Joe Derosa is not trans.

[Mike Benoia]

That's it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

But he is retarded. Everybody.

[Otis Hicks]

Wait.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I want the oil under the water. I want the oil under the water. You said you were golf, so under the oil, under the water. You fucking twat.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Fuck you. Fuck you.

[Brock White Lions]

Also, also, Tony, for the record, offshore they say Joe derosa is trans.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Whoa, look at that. Time to get offshore for you. You love getting sucked off.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I love getting sucked offshore. Sucked offshore. That really blew up in my face. I thought I had him with the offshore thing. I was wrong.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, you made him.

[Brock White Lions]

You made them like you till they found out.

[Joe DeRosa]

And what's that?

[Brock White Lions]

They would like you until they found out.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Out.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I.

That makes perfect sense if you're the

coaching the football team that the water boy played on.

[Mike Benoia]

Doesn't he kind of look like a relief pitcher from like.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, yeah, for sure. He looks like one of those relief pitchers that they play like Metallica for when he comes out and all the lights on. And now pitching for your Detroit Tigers, White Lions.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Strike three.

[Brock White Lions]

It'd be Wu Tang. No, not Metallica.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, so let's.

[Layla]

Let's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Brock, let's talk about what type of shifts when you have to go offshore. Is that for a long period of time at a time.

[Brock White Lions]

So when I'm lucky, yeah, sometimes like 14 and 7, but sometimes I'm poor cuz I got a lot of time off.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

14 and 7, what is that?

[Brock White Lions]

14 days offshore, there you go. 7 days on shore.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

There you go.

And then you do that again and again and again.

[Brock White Lions]

Yes, sir. If I'm lucky.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What's your love life like? You got a girl waiting for married?

[Brock White Lions]

I got a hot wife. Like I said, that's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh yeah, that is true. You do. You did say you have a hot wife.

[Brock White Lions]

Red band should follow her. That would make her night.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Red band's trying to do the math

on when you're gone. 14 days right now, trying to figure out your next shift so that he

could slide into her fucking Louise.

Hey, do you think comedy is funny? Because I work in the comedy business. Have you heard of the jre? Guess who started that? I had told Joe what a podcast was and then he's like, like, let's do it, buddy.

[Brock White Lions]

She'd be lit, she'd be pump. I'd be proud.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Whatever.

[Carvana Advertiser]

All right.

[Mason Bird]

What is it?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, relax.

Can you?

Come on.

All right. So, Brock, how do you trust your wife around all those black men in la? The question, the one why I chose

[Brock White Lions]

this outfit is, you know, to compete with the competition. You know what I'm saying?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Really?

Something else. Even D Madness said that's an aggressive shirt.

[Mike Benoia]

A goblin's a wager. New Jersey.

[Brock White Lions]

Shout out to the goblins, though.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, shout out. Brock, what's like the craziest trouble you ever been in? You ever get a little bit rowdy out there in Lafayette?

[Brock White Lions]

Yeah, I've been. I've been in jail a few times.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

For what? Let's rattle it off here.

[Layla]

Let's.

[Brock White Lions]

I mean, DUIs, drug possessions. I did some burglies, but I got away with those.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, let's talk about. Let's.

I love finding out. This is a new thing on this show.

I love finding out when people get away with things. I love finding out.

[Brock White Lions]

I got a case waiting for me right now in Lake Charles. For what? DUI case.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, okay.

A dui.

Let's talk about the burglaries that you got away with. What exactly did you rob?

[Brock White Lions]

Well, we didn't get in, so.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Who's we?

You and one of my friends.

[Brock White Lions]

They had one teacher. This is a.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How many friends?

[Brock White Lions]

Like maybe three.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay.

[Brock White Lions]

This is a. I'm ashamed of this. I'm not proud.

[Show Assistant]

Right.

[Brock White Lions]

She was a rich lady, so she volunteered, taught. She didn't even get paid.

[Show Assistant]

Need.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yep.

[Brock White Lions]

But she invited us to her house and she was like, y', all, don't touch. That pillow is a thousand dollars. And me and my friends were like, yo, her pillows are a thousand dollars.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

[Brock White Lions]

And then she went on vacation and she told a whole class she was going on vacation. So we tried to break in, but she had good alarms. And

[Mike Benoia]

people with thousand dollar pillows normally have.

[Brock White Lions]

Only thing better than her pillows were her alarms. And so we. We ran away. And then she said a prayer for whoever broke into her house in class a week later.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, my God. And you had to pray along with it for your own healing?

[Aaron Heltz]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's incredible.

[Joe DeRosa]

It's not really getting away with it.

[Mickey Genosi]

No.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Getting away with it.

[Joe DeRosa]

Get caught.

[Brock White Lions]

Well, there's other ones where we, like, we broke in dudes houses and we thought we were going to get drugs, but we couldn't find the drugs.

[Javi Bello]

Drugs.

[Brock White Lions]

So we just turned their whole trailer upside down and did you find the drugs? Nah, no drugs.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Brock White Lions]

But I got away.

[Joe DeRosa]

Take a couple pillows.

[Brock White Lions]

I didn't get in trouble for breaking into their house and looking for. So I feel like that's pretty good.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Let's check in with Mike Fenoya.

[Mike Benoia]

What are you gonna wear to court for this case? I see you wearing.

[Commercial Announcer]

All right.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Hey, that's true.

[Mike Benoia]

This tuxedo T shirt.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Your honor, it's the Goblins. It's. They won this this week against the banana team.

[Mike Benoia]

It's a goblisher with a T. I

[Brock White Lions]

had to assign my wife to buy me a court shirt, and so she sent me stuff on Amazon, and I picked one, and now Amazon Court, it's my court shirt, y'.

[Mike Benoia]

All.

[Brock White Lions]

And y' all could get it when I beat this case. Anybody can have it who wants it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So let's talk about it. Let's do a little run through here. It's good to.

Sometimes they do this for court cases. So what exactly. You're being charged with a boat dui

[Brock White Lions]

N. I. I don't believe it or not. I'm from the city.

[Show Assistant]

City?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, okay.

[Brock White Lions]

From Lafayette, which is more urban. I. I don't.

[Joe DeRosa]

With boats.

[Brock White Lions]

My grandfather. My grandpa was a rice farmer, but that.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Was a rice farmer?

[Mason Bird]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay.

[Brock White Lions]

Crawfish and rice. So he had boats.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Absolutely.

[Brock White Lions]

But I grew up in the city. No boats. So it was a driving one.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Right.

[Brock White Lions]

And it was a Kia. A Kia dui, I guess, you know, driving one, huh? And I was doing a show in Lake Charles, and Lake Charles sucks. There's nothing going over there. They were lucky I was there, and I did a show, and I had a couple drinks, and I'm pretty responsible.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How many is a couple? Five or six? Seven?

[Brock White Lions]

No, it wasn't even a lot. I'm pretty reformed. I'm married now. My wife's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Sure, but what's. What's a couple? I know it's not two.

[Brock White Lions]

I mean, the. The case is pending.

[Mike Benoia]

But please, dude, please tell your lawyer. Please let your lawyer do the talk after.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

After.

[Brock White Lions]

Maybe, like, June 13th. We'll talk about it. You know what I'm saying?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay.

But seriously, though, like, all right, I'll tell you, cuz.

[Brock White Lions]

I love you. Probably like five, six drinks. Yeah, right.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

And so when. Did you hit anything? Or they just lit you up?

[Brock White Lions]

No, they pulled me over for not using my turning signal.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Dog.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, these.

[Brock White Lions]

There's not enough crime in Lake Charles, y'.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

All.

[Joe DeRosa]

Yeah, well, that's a good way to let the officer know you're drunk. It's Called your turning signal.

[Mike Benoia]

Turning signal.

[Aaron Heltz]

What's it called?

[Mike Benoia]

Did you offer him free to the goblins?

[Joe DeRosa]

Turn, signal.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Ah.

[Brock White Lions]

I thought it was turning.

[Joe DeRosa]

No, don't say that in court.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So he got you for the signal. Lights go up, you're like, ah. Did you have any drugs on you or anything?

[Brock White Lions]

Yeah, I had some weed, but it was in a. It was in a pink grinder. As my wives, y'.

[Aaron Heltz]

All.

[Layla]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's okay. Did it smell at all? Did he smell that?

[Brock White Lions]

Yeah, he smelled the alcohol because I panicked when they pulled me over.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Uhhuh.

[Brock White Lions]

Oh, I'mma get. I'm.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's great. Keep going, keep going.

It's coming out.

This coming out after your court case.

[Brock White Lions]

This is not admissible. I threw it out on the floor.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Wait, you were drinking while you were driving?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Jesus Christ. People go, what's up with Tony in these interviews? Why do you. Does he go on and on with these people? What is he looking for? Why get them off stage? It went on too long. Get to the next bucket pole. And then you find gold, my friend. You were drinking while driving, and your move when you saw the police lights was, oh, you throw it around the car. Yes, absolutely. It's unbiased, believable. If that was in a comedy movie, people would be like, well, nobody would do that. And meanwhile, here we are. You're like, I shouldn't say, tony, I got a case coming up.

It's so real.

God, this show is amazing.

[Javi Bello]

It is.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And you are completely stupid. It is unbelievable. Out of all the DUI stories in 13 years on this show, I don't think it gets better than. Oh, man, it's gonna smell this alcohol. I gotta get rid of it.

[Brock White Lions]

Well, I didn't want.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

He's. There's no way he's gonna take a sniff at this empty cup in the

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

cup holder, by the way.

[Brock White Lions]

No evidence, dog. They don't have.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Hold on.

[Joe DeRosa]

There's no way.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

By the way. You try to play it off like

[Joe DeRosa]

you had three drinks. Nobody's drinking the third drink while they're driving.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You're drinking the 15th drink.

[Brock White Lions]

It was the six, like Tony said.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That makes sense. Six drinks. I'm spot on. I can tell when a person thinks

[Brock White Lions]

they're behaving singles in a double glass. So you get more water.

[Mike Benoia]

It's also Louisiana. Three drinks could be like three hurricanes. Like, he literally drank a yard of train, right?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yes, sir. Why is your passenger seat blue with power pedals all.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I only had about 6 meters of drink today. You were making the wrong decision.

At every turnings.

[Brock White Lions]

Yeah, but I hired a lawyer.

[Mike Benoia]

He's drinking drinks called Alligator Jizz and fucking Voodoo juice.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I was having some of the guava Goblin juice. Next thing you know, this cop's telling me I didn't use my turnings.

[Brock White Lions]

Turning signal.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You can't arrest me. I'm offshore. You're on land right now, sir?

[Otis Hicks]

Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Let's go. Is your name wife's name Cosmo?

[Brock White Lions]

Yeah, Cosmo. Elizabeth.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I already know her.

How's that possible?

What's going on? What's happening? Explain to the people. It sends me a lot of messages.

[Brock White Lions]

All right, dog. Whatever.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, you looked up his Instagram? Like a real creep.

[Brock White Lions]

Brian redbit all the black guys from there. She's picking red, man. That's insulting.

[Mike Benoia]

Does she spell Elizabeth with an S? Yes, because it's on his arm and I want to make.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

My God.

That.

That's my girl. Alyssa B. She's beautiful, though.

[Layla]

She is.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, red band. For the love of God.

[Brock White Lions]

It's in Wuang font. Tony.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I. I can tell.

[Brock White Lions]

Cuz two things are forever.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What are they?

[Brock White Lions]

Wuang and Elizabeth.

[Javi Bello]

Dog.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Immortal Elizabeth. She's never going to be in a graveyard while a fat Amish guy's getting his dick sucked. She's going to live forever. Just like the Wu Tang.

[Mike Benoia]

Cash definitely does not rule everything around you. That's one thing with this person.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

[Brock White Lions]

Work off. Sure. You'd be surprised.

[Mike Benoia]

I know.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Well. Brock White Lions. Very, very fun set. Very fun interview. We like your style. Come back, sign up again sometime. All right. There he goes. The Kiltoni debut of Brock White Lions, everybody. Hola,

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Dijon.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

La Monstere. One more time for the lovely Heidi.

[Commercial Announcer]

From furniture to tableware, the best for outdoor living is at Paragould. The destination for luxury home. Elevate how you go al fresco with quality pieces in every style from design's best brands. Shop our largest ever selection and enjoy free, fast full service delivery on most items in store and [e-mail] evening by remorse.

[Brock White Lions]

Buy a new car.

[Mike Benoia]

I'll be moving in.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Let's get started.

[Commercial Announcer]

Sorry, I think there's been a mistake.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I bought it from Carvana.

[Carvana Advertiser]

You what?

[Commercial Announcer]

Yeah, Great price. I even have seven days to love

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

it or return it.

[Commercial Announcer]

So there's no, no, no buyer's remorse. More like buyers rejoice.

[Carvana Advertiser]

I guess I'll let myself out.

[Brock White Lions]

Congratulations.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I mean it.

[Commercial Announcer]

Buyers rejoice. Buy your car today on Carvana. Limitations and exclusions may apply. See our seven day return [e-mail] Back

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

to the bucket we go, everybody. Your next comedian goes by the name of Megan Knights, Everyone. Here we go.

[Megan Knight]

My husband and I are going through couples therapy. It's kind of like a threesome for people who hate sex. It's weird for me. I live in Texas where therapy's only okay if it's to heal a bone or stop being gay. My husband thinks I work too hard. I'm a health and fitness coach. Looking at the people here in Texas, I'm obviously not working hard enough. My husband's an underemployed musician. Now I'm doing standup on a podcast. We're basically trying to austin each other to death. He's one of the few people who's been both a gobo dancer in a gay club and a country western singer. Unless you count the guy that shows up at Lindsey Graham's house in different outfits. He actually tried organizing a stand up show once, but it was just like when we have sex. Nobody came. And yet he still recorded it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Megan Knight.

57 seconds.

Megan Knight. Knight or Knight.

I guess it doesn't matter. Megan.

[Show Assistant]

What?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Welcome.

How long you been doing standup?

[Megan Knight]

Approximately 56 seconds.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

First set ever. I love it.

Seems like you and your husband are going through it, huh? How long you been with this guy?

[Megan Knight]

About five years.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, where'd you meet?

[Megan Knight]

Facebook.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay.

Wow.

Five years, Facebook. All right, you guys are 70 years old or something?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing. What does he do for a living?

[Megan Knight]

He is a musician.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And what do you do for a living?

[Megan Knight]

Health and fitness coach.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's right. Okay, you mentioned all that. Is he, like, a good musician?

[Megan Knight]

He really is, yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

He's a vocalist for a famous band or something?

[Megan Knight]

Not. I mean, to me. Yes, to you, yes, eventually, yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You sure he's not struggling at all being a musician?

[Megan Knight]

I did say underemployed.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wait, so, yes. So you're the main provider in the relationship?

[Layla]

No.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You make more money than him?

[Megan Knight]

Equal.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Equal seems low.

A low amount of money.

[Megan Knight]

He covers, he pays our rent, and I love it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Where do you live?

[Megan Knight]

Here in Austin?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah. For how long?

[Megan Knight]

About three years.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, what made you want to start standup here tonight and just make fun of your husband as part of your therapy or something?

[Megan Knight]

Yeah. One of his goals for 2026 was to do stand up, so I had to beat him to it.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

I love it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

This is amazing. I've never seen anything quite like this before. Amazing. Megan, what's the fattest person you've ever had to pretend like you're going to

make their life Better that showed up to you and is like, me want fitness and health.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Oh, gosh.

[Megan Knight]

Like real talk? Yeah, probably 300. Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What were you able to do with. I didn't know you. Red band went to you.

So proud of you for trying to get help.

What were you able to do? Did they lose any weight or did they not show up on the third training session? I'm guessing I bet they do two.

[Megan Knight]

He ended up quitting and went on a glp.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, I bet that's happening a lot lately. Is that messing up your business as a fitness trainer? Just fat people just injecting themselves in the neck with fat stuff.

[Megan Knight]

Honestly, no. Typically, my Clientele has, like, 30 pounds to lose, and you still need the foundation.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And what exactly do you tell them to do? Tell Redband what exactly? How would you recommend red band losing £30?

He's been on.

I'm not kidding you. He's lost six pounds in two weeks.

Is that right? Hold on. Hold applause. Let me tell you the diet he's on.

This is true.

I'm not kidding. I'm not joking.

He's been exclusively only eating. This is how bad he was eating before. For the last two weeks, he's lost six pounds by only eating sandwiches, everybody.

He's on the sandwich diet. And. And it's working. His body cannot believe the amount of health pumping through his veins. My mentor Jared had a thing going that.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

He told me this the other night in a bar. He told me this the other night in a bar. And he's going, I just ate sandwiches, and I'm.

[Show Assistant]

It's working.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

And it was literally like talking to a guy going, I don't have a problem.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

As his nose was bleeding.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

It's like, yeah, red band, not okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's literally like the kratom. It's like the kratom. People going, I'm off a heroin. Yeah, I'm doing great. Sandwiches only.

[Mike Benoia]

You want to go do some provolone in the bathroom?

[Adam Lucky]

I love it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What's the bread of choice that you're going with for the other fat?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Where's my sourdough babies at? Come on.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Sourdough, ladies and gentlemen. Do that anymore?

Megan, what kind of. What kind of food would you recommend for fat people? Listening. Do you. Are you. Is nutrition your thing, too? Are you mostly just, like, pumping pink weights like that or something?

[Megan Knight]

Oh, pink weights. Come on.

[Joe DeRosa]

Well, and why do you think Austin.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

You're joking.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Like, you think Austin's not healthy?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Because I feel like Austin's, like, one

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

of the healthiest cities Ever. There's so much hiking and, and fitness here.

[Joe DeRosa]

Honestly, I think you insane.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah. The side dishes here are white bread and pickles for you, pig.

[Mike Benoia]

Because of all the vomiting.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And he doesn't have a side of

white bread and pickles.

That's part of the main meal.

You can't have a side of bread and pickles when your entree sandwich is bread and pickles.

Losing weight from only eating sandwiches and everybody goes, what were you eating before? He goes, so much fried food. So it really is. He's upgrading by only eating sandwiches. So there you go. One day, very soon, it'll just be me up here and I'll be doing sound effects and time going, oh, I can't handle all this pressure. Well, what's your girlfriend's Instagram account?

Fart noise. Fart noise. No, I'm kidding. He's gonna. He's gonna outlive me. No doubt about it. Look at him. He doesn't love you. Oh, Megan, I like your bangs.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You have.

[Joe DeRosa]

You had, for a first time standup.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

You had very good jokes.

[Joe DeRosa]

All things can, like, seriously, it's. It's not an easy thing to do. You had some good jokes. Just next time you do it, memorize your jokes. Cause you're not gonna get out of your head or out of your own way if you're reading off of paper. And then also when you're new, it looks like you don't give a shit. I'm not saying I'm not. I don't mean that critically. I mean it constructively. Like, if you memorize your jokes, you'll get looser, they'll hit harder, and you're gonna get even better.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

But that's the people were seeing you glance at the paper. It's a big piece of paper, and you could have just like even written it on the inside of your wrist. I see some bad tattoos there.

You could have just. You could have just etched him in. We would have thought it was part of your tattoo.

And then it looks kind of normal. You could just give a little glance. You could have snuck it.

[Megan Knight]

Yeah.

[Mike Benoia]

And like, tell the punch lines to the back of the room. You know, you were kind of like looking down, like, almost like you were like, coily. But it's your first time.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

But how did it make you feel?

[Show Assistant]

What.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What was unexpected about your first time? The lights are brighter than you expected.

[Megan Knight]

Maybe a little, like, can't really see a whole lot going on over there.

[Mike Benoia]

It's better that way.

[Megan Knight]

It is better that way.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Deep madness.

Do you agree With.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

All right.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

So much.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I know.

[Layla]

Out.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I know. Same old joke every goddamn time.

[Lowe's Advertiser]

I'm sorry.

[Megan Knight]

No, I had it all memorized. I just, you know, stayed trite. I'm gonna black out and just forget everything.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It happens. Well, your first time is officially happened. Here's a little joke book coming out.

Oh, great catch. Hard throw on my card. Make a night, everybody. On to the next one we go. Make some noise for your next comedian, everybody. It's Layla, everyone.

Here comes Layla.

[Layla]

Hello.

[Megan Knight]

Hi.

[Layla]

I should have peed earlier. Don't you think that Nike's slogan just sounds a little passive aggressive? Because I remember hearing it the first time. It was when my husband and I, we were fighting and he said to me, if you spit on my mother's photo one more time, bitch, I'll divorce you. So go ahead, he said, just do it. I did. It worked. He divorced me. This slogan actually works every time I use it. One time, my close friend texted me at 3am at night. He said, no one loves me. I'm going to kill myself tonight. I was very tired that night. Sleepless. It was the first day of my period. And I said, listen, man, just. Just do it. You did.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Thank you, Lea. Welcome, Layla.

[Megan Knight]

Hello.

[Layla]

Hi.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah. You're doing it. You are shaking.

[Megan Knight]

And.

[Layla]

Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How long you been doing standup?

[Layla]

One year.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

One year. Where at? Where you been doing that at?

[Layla]

It's mostly Cold Town Theater, honestly. And one where? Cold Town Theater. Open mics there.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, okay. Place. Okay.

[Layla]

Yeah. And it's Velveeta Room.

[Show Assistant]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So you're doing it here in Austin, Texas. Where's that accent from? Where are you from?

[Layla]

I am from Azerbaijan.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What?

[Layla]

Azerbaijan. It's next to Armenia and. Armenia, Georgia. Turkish.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What's it called again?

[Megan Knight]

Huh?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Say it again.

[Layla]

Azerbaijan.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay. All right.

[Mike Benoia]

Parmesan.

[Layla]

It's a song.

[Mike Benoia]

Parmesan. Delicious country.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It is as.

As wild.

[Joe DeRosa]

This is like I would watch Borat

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

and I'd be like, come on, that's not real.

[Layla]

As a bizan, yes. As a big fan.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Amazing.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So what made you want to start standup a year ago? Layla,

[Layla]

it's very simple. I'm a woman and I dated a man. He was a stand up comedian. We broke up. Yeah. And I don't have any identity, so I was like, I'm just gonna do what he did.

[Mike Benoia]

Yes.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Fantastic.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow. Unbelievably honest answer from Layla.

You're such a gentleman, genuine person. I think it really helps your entire everything. The.

Hello. Hi.

In the beginning, you took your time. You should have peed before this made.

Made you very human.

You connected with the people. It seems like you have a great fundamental understanding kind of, of how comedy works.

[Layla]

Oh, thank you so much. I. I'm on my period right now.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

See what I mean?

[Mike Benoia]

Right.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

The vulnerability, the realism of it all.

Absolutely incredible. Are you like this when you're not on your period?

[Layla]

I. I look angrier when I'm not on my period.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

Reverse.

People from AZ Bajan are different. AJBajan. When they're on their period, they're happier. She's wet. Thank you. Red Band. Absolutely crushing tonight. Night Talk. More, please. Jesus Christ, dude.

Isn't there a wacky Middle Eastern sound effect that you can think of?

Jesus Christ.

Leila, what do you do for a living?

[Layla]

I make dildos.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

No, you don't. No way.

[Show Assistant]

No way,

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

No way. This is true.

[Mike Benoia]

I should have peed before.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What do you mean you make dildos? Because I buy dildos. So. I mean, this makes us a perfect couple.

Layla.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Layla]

I'm.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

You.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You make actual dildos?

[Layla]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

In a factory or at home.

[Layla]

Oh, I sketch them.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You draw dildos?

[Show Assistant]

Yeah.

[Megan Knight]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Do the outline for the dildos that

[Layla]

are made, the new one that are going to be made.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You are the designer of dildos?

[Layla]

Yes.

[Show Assistant]

Holy.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, my God. Wow.

[Mike Benoia]

Seems like a hard job to be original.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's the crazy.

[Show Assistant]

We.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

We went from talking about sourdough and

[Layla]

we're a Muslim girl.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And now it's dill dough and sourdough with pickles dildo. What are the odds of that?

If you had that at DraftKings using the promo code, Giltoni, you just made $9 billion.

So how many dildos do you think you've designed?

[Layla]

It's 20, maybe. 20.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

[Layla]

Yeah, it's actually easier to design fantasy dildos. Like, you don't have to see any, like, dicks or anything. Like, you. You just fantasize about them because you haven't seen them in a long time. So that's. That's how I make them.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow. And so there's a printing company or a factory that makes your wishes come true.

That's a. Unbelievable.

[Layla]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Unbelievable.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Fantastic.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I know all about it. I work at the end of the assembly line. I get on all fours and they check them in my ass before they put them in the box. And I go, it's good, it's good. That's good. That one's good. That's another winner. Keep them coming.

[Joe DeRosa]

Can I.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Dream job.

[Joe DeRosa]

Can I commission a dildo from you? Can I get a custom?

[Layla]

Yes, yes.

[Joe DeRosa]

Did you design one that's attached to a woman who used to be a man?

[Layla]

Do you need a face too to that?

[Joe DeRosa]

Why not?

[Layla]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

Incredible. What's the biggest, biggest dildo you've ever designed? If you could show us with your fingers.

[Adam Lucky]

Like.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, fingers length hands.

Hands as they're called in ash bagash.

[Joe DeRosa]

Gosh.

[Layla]

The biggest. Like this.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, there to there. What are you, what are there. Okay.

Wow.

[Mike Benoia]

What was it called?

[Megan Knight]

Black.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

The Black edition.

Cody. I, I, I got Janice's sweet little combo box. Has a big one, a little one

[Joe DeRosa]

and a small one.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

They're all black and they pulsate. It's called the Barber Shop. It's I highly recommend. Very good.

There you go.

Another unbelievable thing from Red Band who's clearly losing his mind tonight. It's on Amazon. Great. Yes, I believe you. No one gives a though like that has nothing to do with the person up here and everything that's happening.

Very good.

Go check out Red Band's dildo plug, everybody. Are you trying to get like free ones or something like that? It just stop.

Jesus Christ.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

On a diet of peanut butter and jelly.

[Mike Benoia]

Get this man a grilled cheese.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Favorite sandwich.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Unbelievable.

The Uncrustable Brian Red Band.

Leila, what's your love life like? You, you know, you're with no one since you broke up with the comedian a year ago. Is that the gist I'm getting?

[Layla]

Yeah, well, I started seeing another comedian after that and we, we didn't even, it wasn't even a situationship. It was like hug me in shapeship. Like she just wanted to hug

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

the female. No, he, he just wanted to hug.

He looks gay.

[Layla]

Yeah, but he's a man. He's a man. He just. Yeah, I wanted to hug and then he said, I'm back with my ex, I don't want to hug anymore. So that was that.

[Mike Benoia]

Honestly, you, you shouldn't date any more comedians because you're going to be funnier than all, all of them and there's going to be a lot of jealous.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That is true.

[Mike Benoia]

There's going to be a lot of jealousy.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's true. They're just going to drag you down and be jealous and it's amazing.

Go ahead, Joe.

[Joe DeRosa]

I was just going to. I think you might have said it already. How long have you been doing comedy?

[Layla]

One year.

[Joe DeRosa]

You're really good.

[Mike Benoia]

Yeah, really great.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Uhoh. Joe's trying to be the next comedian.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Uh oh, I need some coattails to

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

ride some dildos to ride.

No, I'm serious.

[Joe DeRosa]

You're really really funny. Like, you're. You're off to a very, very strong start. You're going to be very.

[Mike Benoia]

Be yourself. You're going to kill it.

[Layla]

It means a lot. Thank you.

[Joe DeRosa]

Of course.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, Layla, you're leaving here with

a big joke, but congratulations. There you go. The debut of Layla, everybody.

[Mike Benoia]

She could draw Q3's pipeline in that notebook.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Her social media is Han Hanova, Adam Lucky, who had a great set earlier, is Adam Lucky with an E before the Y. And Lucky.

You guys still having fun out there, huh? We're coming around the mountain now. We're coming around the corner. Your next bucket bowl goes by the name of Mickey Genosi, everybody. Or Mikey Genosi.

[Mickey Genosi]

What's going on, Austin? I've been living here for a couple months now, and I think my favorite thing about Texas is your guys's lingo. Like, I love how you guys call all your thick Latinas tortas down here, you know, because that's just a Mexican sandwich. How have we not started doing that with all of the races? Like, if you hook up with a big Asian girl, you could be like, yeah, I fucked a steam bun last night.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

I.

[Mickey Genosi]

I took home a bond me.

[Aaron Heltz]

You know, if you're talking about a

[Mickey Genosi]

big white girl, you'd be like, yeah, Becky was hot in high school, but when she got married and had a couple kids, that bitch is a straight hoagie now, you know, God damn,

[Megan Knight]

if

[Mickey Genosi]

you're talking about a big black girl, you could be like, man, this girl didn't look anything like her online profile picture. I thought I matched with this busty African queen on Hinge, but when she showed up, she was a catfish po boy, you know,

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I got one more.

[Mickey Genosi]

Can I do one more? I know it's not a race, but I do have one for little people.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So

[Mickey Genosi]

if you're at a bachelor party and you're like, hey, did you hear Jake fucked that thick midget stripper last night? You'd be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, man. You can't say that. It's 2026. You got to be progressive. You know they prefer to be called sliders now.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, absolutely. Perfect.

Mickey Genosi.

[Mickey Genosi]

That's correct.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah. Welcome, welcome. How long you been doing stand up?

[Mickey Genosi]

Nine years.

[Adam Lucky]

I love it.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Where at?

[Mickey Genosi]

Cleveland.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Whoa.

Up there at Hilarities, huh?

[Aaron Heltz]

Yep.

[Mickey Genosi]

Hilarities is my home club. Shout out.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hilarities, man, I'm home.

[Aaron Heltz]

Clubs in the country.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

We love it. We love it. Absolutely. Awesome. What do you think, Mike?

[Mike Benoia]

A lot of sandwich humor.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Got red band. Hard as A rock over the horniest he's been all day.

So Mickey, you're born and raised in Cleveland.

[Mickey Genosi]

Akron originally, but lived in Cleveland for like the last five years.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

There you go.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I was right in between you there in Youngstown. How old are you?

[Mickey Genosi]

I am 32.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

32, okay. Incredible. What do you do for work?

[Mickey Genosi]

I. I sell mortgage products.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Ooh, mortgage products.

[Mickey Genosi]

Yeah. I basically destroy people's equity. That's what I do in their house.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing people in Cleveland that really, really are.

[Mickey Genosi]

No, all over the country.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, good, good. At least we keep it spread around. What's your love life like, Mickey?

[Mickey Genosi]

I was in a long term relationship and we tried to do long distance and we just had to kind of cut it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah. When did that end?

[Mickey Genosi]

A couple months ago.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, and what have you been doing since then? Are you excited about it? If you've met anyone, have you talked with anyone? Are you on any of the apps?

[Mickey Genosi]

No, I'm just trying to focus on like getting booked and everything right now, and I feel like everything else will just kind of fall into place, you know?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah. So nothing. Nothing yet. Nothing here in Austin. How long you been here?

[Mickey Genosi]

I've been here for about seven months now.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

So.

[Mason Bird]

No, I'm just.

[Mickey Genosi]

Just chilling right now.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

So you moved here seven months ago?

[Mickey Genosi]

Yeah.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yep.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Have you kissed a girl since you've been here?

[Mickey Genosi]

I have not.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Well, let me tell you something. Can we get the red interior lights on real quick? Cuz we have a segment on this show for the last 13 years called Kiss Me Is.

[Mason Bird]

Whoa.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

We already got one standing up. Here she comes, everybody. Like a lucky Price is Right winner. This was ready? Holy wow. My friend, you are about to get your first Texas kiss. And everything's bigger here in Texas, including the herpes that you're about to get. Mickey Genosi. This is very exciting.

This.

Oh, he's putting gum in his mouth. This is very exciting.

[Mike Benoia]

I gave him a cinnamon.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Ladies and gentlemen, his first kiss. Mickey Genocide.

[Adam Lucky]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Get a Nicky.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

The crowd goes wild.

[Mickey Genosi]

Wild.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, my God. Yeah. This is Pill Tony. We are the number one live podcast in the world, and it's brought to you by Shopify, Tacobas and Saly. That was legit. That was legit.

[Mike Benoia]

She took. I gave you a cinnamon and now she has it.

[Mickey Genosi]

Yeah, she has.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Has.

[Mickey Genosi]

Is.

[Mike Benoia]

It's amazing.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That almost ate your head off. Mickey. Josi. She's signing a waiver right now.

Last time a lady came on to

do that, she refused to sign the

waiver, so we had to blur out and it was the worst kiss imaginable. She did, like, a peck on, like, the cheek, and she's, like, pink. Whatever she was, she was a lot

hotter than whatever that haggard thing was. But you got very lucky there. The. That is incredible.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

She's. Sorry.

[Mickey Genosi]

I don't give a. You know, I'm not judging what I said. I'm into it.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I don't give a. I love it. Hell, yeah.

You were doing good.

[Adam Lucky]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You almost got pregnant from that kiss. That was incredible. There was a lot of bodily fluids exchanged.

How about what.

What's your.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

What she in.

[Mike Benoia]

She went in the wrong row.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

She's hot. What's your name, sweetheart?

[Layla]

Step.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How about a hand for Step? Everybody stepping up, being a real team player. She's back with her boyfriend.

Some dude's gonna be picturing his.

When he's fucking her later.

He's gonna think of your sperm head.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

He smelled that gum.

[Mickey Genosi]

I just want to say that guy has hair, too, so she obviously has

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

a thing for bald guys, so that's. She let it rip. Okay. Turn the lights back down.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Not him.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right.

So, Mickey, how do you feel now?

[Mickey Genosi]

I feel great, man.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah.

You had a great set.

You did it all on one one subject. Your materials tight. Everything was good. Even earned a little extra time there to finish your. Your sliders joke, which is great. Everything's great. I would shorten the setups just a little bit. Like, you're, like, right there. You know what I mean? You don't have to even do a. Like, a setup thing. You could just go, I hooked up.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

You.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You can find a device to get to those punches even quicker. You know, I hooked up with a girl. She was a real thick girl. She was a real slider. You know, like, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. Just find ways. It's tricky out there. You know, when you're on the road and stuff again, you know, starting at the store and being around the greats, what you learn is short, short, short, short. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. How do you get there faster? And you have such great. Such a great premise. I don't know how many like that you have that. Some people like to extend out those one subject bits, but in all reality, boom. And then you're on to the next one, the next one, the next one.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Because you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

If you can write a minute about sandwich, torta girl, things like that, then that you can pretty much write about anything with that great brain of yours. So congratulations.

[Aaron Heltz]

Oh, thank you, man.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I appreciate it.

[Lowe's Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Here's a. Here's a big Joke book to Mickey Genosi. Everybody is killed. Tony debut. I'm pretty sure it's all debuts tonight except for Adam Lucky, who ripped the roof off the joint. This is a fun show. You guys have as much fun as I am tonight. I love this. All right.

[Commercial Announcer]

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[Show Assistant]

Com.

[Carvana Advertiser]

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[Tony Hinchcliffe]

This might be our last bucket pool tonight. Make some noise for Austin Gersten Schlogger. Austin Gersten Schlog.

[Adam Lucky]

Thank you.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

My name's Austin Gerstenslager. I just realized I look exactly like how my last name sounds. I've been going to the same barber for a while. I keep telling her I want to look more youthful. Think she thought I meant Hitler youthful? No. Last time I saw her, I had a mustache. She was like, I think we should just take a little bit off the side. Go for that Charlie Chaplin, Michael Jordan look, you know? Let's see. I recently moved back in with my grandparents. That's been a lot of fun.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

No, it's cool.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

I don't have to pay rent anymore. I don't have to do my own laundry. But the only woman I ever have over now is my grandma. No, it's weird. Like, the hardest part about having a woman over is when the sex gets really loud. Not have to awkwardly knock on their door and ask my grandparents to be quiet.

[Show Assistant]

All right.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

That's been my time.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Austin Gersten Slager, One of the most fun names to say in the history of the show.

[Layla]

Oh, yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Welcome, Austin. How long you been doing stand up?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Two years.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Two years? Where at?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

San Diego.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

San Diego.

Did you move here or do you

still live in San Diego?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

I still live in San Diego. Just here for the week.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I love, love it. What have you been doing this week?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Oh, just stand up. Just trying to hit mics. Eating barbecue. It's been cool.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hell, yeah.

[Lowe's Advertiser]

Absolutely.

[Mike Benoia]

And you kept it off your shirt?

[Adam Lucky]

Oh, yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Hell, yeah.

[Joe DeRosa]

Yeah. Good job. I think you're great, man. One of my only notes. This is just show business. Thinking you might want to change your name. It sounds a little ridiculous.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, good luck getting a business run. Run by the Jews to book it, Mr. Gersten. Schlager.

[Mike Benoia]

What should he change it to? Adolf.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

No, wait. Adolf H. I didn't get the bit out.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Well, you should have do shorter setups. One thing I've learned from the greats is that if you keep your setups real short.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Let me do the joke. Let me do the joke.

[Aaron Heltz]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, here we go. Start the clock. Red band.

[Joe DeRosa]

You want me to change your name because it sounds a little ridiculous, and you might want to change your last name also.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Come on.

[Show Assistant]

What?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I literally all that, and I still don't get your joke.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

His first name is ridiculous.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Oh, got it, got it, got it.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Christ. Come on.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow. Wow. Sometimes the juice ain't worth the squeeze.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Hey, you leave the Jews out of it. He doesn't like that kind of thing.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Little fun fact for you.

Die hard, kill Tony fans. I never make fun of the panelists. So if Seinfeld, Chris Rock, Louis ck, or Dave Chappelle are watching, which I know they do sometimes, just know that DeRosa is an exception to my rule.

He's one of my closest drinking buddies, and I swear I will never make fun of you guys if you're on panel.

We make fun of the bucket pools. We definitely make fun of over here.

But I will never pick on you,

Mr. Rock, Seinfeld, CK, or Chappelle.

Remember that?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Fair enough. But you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You pig.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I have a. I have a similar rule.

[Show Assistant]

Oh, yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hold on, hold on. Let's start the countdown.

[Mickey Genosi]

I usually.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I usually don't make fun of the host of the podcast I'm on. Except for you.

[Aaron Heltz]

You.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

We're really good friends. We talk on the phone sometimes during the daytime. Crazy. Very short. He likes to keep it long. But I'm always like, I got something to do. Someone's calling me. I'm like, Jesus. Anyway, Mr. Gerstenschlager, I love it.

What's.

What are your parents like?

What's the Gersten Slager family like? I mean, is it as scary as we think it is?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Oh, yeah. My dad was in prison growing up.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

In prison?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Oh, yeah. He was in prison growing up.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

He had the.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

All the tattoos, you know?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

[Megan Knight]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

In the prison. Was he working at.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

No, no, he was in prison.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Okay.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

My mom was 17. He wasn't a teenager at the time.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

My God. Amazing. I mean, I'm really looking at this guy. The eyes, the hair. I mean, this is like literally Hitler's wet dream. He would. You would have been his right hand man back in the day.

[Mike Benoia]

Oh, God, I feel like he could play Sting in the Police Years in the documentary.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How about mom? What's mom like?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

School. She's cool.

[Megan Knight]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

She supports you doing stand up.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Oh, yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You have a real job as well?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

Oh, yeah, I do it basically.

[Clay McLaren]

Okay.

[Mason Bird]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right. You surf?

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

I body surf. I'm kind of a. I'm not gonna.

[Mike Benoia]

Really?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Well, I'm gay, too.

I'm kidding.

[Show Assistant]

I'm kidding.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right. Austin Gersten Schlager.

Isn't it fun?

You guys all want to say it?

Let's do it on three.

One, two, three.

[Mike Benoia]

Austin Gersten Schlager.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's fun, right? All right, Austin. You're getting a big joke book. I've run out of them up here. We'll get you one in the back on your way out.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Thank you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

All right, let's squeeze in one last bucketful, huh? Let's go to overtime. Just one. Your final bucket bowl of the night, ladies and gentlemen. 60 seconds uninterrupted. Going to Aaron Heltz, everybody. Aaron Heltz. Oh, yeah, look at this.

[Aaron Heltz]

I learned this today. They're called unisex bathrooms because you can have sex in them one time. Before they escort you out of TJ Maxx. They were very adamant about the second time. It was a no go. You know, I watch pornography. I was watching this video, this lady, nice lady. I don't know, fuck it. She was doing nice things to two gentlemen at the same time. I didn't fucking like it. I didn't like a click, you know, Dislike thumbs up. That's just giving that lady too much power. At any point in time, she can be like, you know what? And now I'm a gay guy. I'm just trying to get a blow job with my best friend. Now I'm into something new. What if she touches them together? It's like jumper cables. It sparks, I come. I'm like, I gotta get out of this. TJ Maxx. They already do not like me. My name Darren Hill.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Thank you for that. Holy shit. What the fuck?

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Great job.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Jesus Christ Almighty. What the. Are you.

[Layla]

Hello.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow. Aaron Heltz.

Holy. Where have you been?

[Aaron Heltz]

Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow. Baton Rouge.

[Mike Benoia]

That's dirty.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's where you live?

[Aaron Heltz]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Still?

[Aaron Heltz]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How long you been on stand up?

[Aaron Heltz]

Three years.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Three years?

[Show Assistant]

Yes.

[Mike Benoia]

Good.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

[Aaron Heltz]

You pulled my buddy Brock.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

[Aaron Heltz]

We drove here together.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You Guys drove here together. And two different people from El Paso also were pulled tonight. Absolutely. An amazing night for your trusty bucket of destiny.

[Aaron Heltz]

He's my best black friend.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing, Amazing. Aaron, you are so funny. How much material do you think you have of that caliber?

[Aaron Heltz]

Solid 20 minutes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow.

[Aaron Heltz]

We gotta work hard. There's not a lot of opportunities. I mean, there is, but we gotta travel hours to do like. We gotta make sure chick like count.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah. It's a long trip. How long?

[Aaron Heltz]

I'm happy this drive went well. What?

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How long was that drive?

[Aaron Heltz]

It's like eight hours, I think.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Why don't you do another minute? You want to do another minute?

One more minute from Aaron House. I mean, that minute was so crazy. I have to see another minute. We got to see what's going on.

[Aaron Heltz]

All right. Me and my wife been together since we were 15 years old. I'm 30, so it's been too long, actually, I think too long. We're the only people we've ever had sex with. So when it came to sex, we were like homeschool kids. We were making a lot of shit up, you know? She's like, I don't think I should be upside down for this. And I'm like, well, it feels good. So we're gonna do that every time. My poor wife has scoliosis. It's terrible. Neck brace and everything.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Just keep, keep going, keep going. A little bit more.

[Show Assistant]

All right.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What do you guys think? Should we have him do a little bit more? What?

The eight hours. I could ask boring interview questions. Or we could have a great stand up.

Do stand up. I get to do whatever the.

I. I don't really care. If you wouldn't have clapped, we'd be doing it anyway. Give a one more time. Here's another minute from Aaron Heltz, everybody.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah, lay in.

[Mike Benoia]

Do it

[Aaron Heltz]

as a straight white man. I believe that trans porn is the straightest porn. Because, I mean, regular porn's 50.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

50.

[Aaron Heltz]

You get a woman and a man, that's 50, 50. But with trans porn, you can play with those percentages, you know, 60, 40, you get a fucking trans woman. Regular woman, 75%. That's a lot of woman. Trans man, trans woman. You're back to 50, 50. You're good. But it's like driving in England. It's like, you gotta get used to it, you know, like the. The titties are on the other side.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You just gotta.

[Show Assistant]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Crowd goes absolutely wild.

[Lowe's Advertiser]

Excellent.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah. Wow.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Excellent.

[Joe DeRosa]

Excellent. Man, that, that. I mean, you came out so strong. I'm A sucker for, like, a good misdirection joke. They always make me laugh. The TJ Maxx thing was great. It really was, man.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

[Joe DeRosa]

And then you just kept getting better from there. And honestly, man, I love that you're, like. You're. You're almost like an edgier, like Jeff Foxworthy in the sense that, like, you have these, like, edgy jokes, but you say them kind of clean.

[Aaron Heltz]

Yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Don't lose that. That.

[Joe DeRosa]

Don't lose that. I'm telling you, do not lose that. The fact that you're saying edgy, but

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

you're saying it in, like, a friendly, clean way. That's great, man.

[Joe DeRosa]

That's great. Don't lose that.

[Mike Benoia]

It could just be the car heart and the mustache that's making it very

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

fox work for everybody tonight.

[Mike Benoia]

You're incredibly likable, and it's like you're like. You got that thing where it's like, I want to hang out with this dude after. You know what I mean? So appreciate that.

[Otis Hicks]

Yeah.

[Mike Benoia]

That's huge.

[Aaron Heltz]

Thank you.

[Mike Benoia]

Just don't hang out with Joe. Cause he'll.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What do you do for work, Aaron?

[Aaron Heltz]

I'm a firefighter.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Wow. In Baton Rouge.

[Aaron Heltz]

Baton Rouge.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

How long you been doing that for?

[Aaron Heltz]

10 years.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What's the craziest thing that you've seen out? Firefighting.

[Aaron Heltz]

Oh, man. It's Baton Rouge. I mean, other than the sad gang violence stuff, the craziest thing is I saw two drunk dudes, like, they. Super drunk. Then they hugged each other goodbye at a bar, and then they got in the same car.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing.

[Aaron Heltz]

That's what Baton Rouge is about.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Amazing.

[Aaron Heltz]

Just looking at your bro, just being like, brother, we just might not make it home tonight.

[Mike Benoia]

And that's how Jazz Fest started.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Aaron, I find you unbelievably hilarious, and. And I think you've done Baton Rouge a great thing here today, ladies and gentlemen. That's the golden ticket, and it is going to. Aaron Helps, everybody.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Aaron helps has arrived at the Kill Tony universe. That's how it goes, buddy.

[Aaron Heltz]

Thank you so much.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Great interview. Great sets. Multiple sets all at once.

It's one of the first times I

think I've ever done that like that continuously.

You handled the pressure perfectly.

Funny. On your feet. Unbelievably great.

[Layla]

Great.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Stand up. Congratulations and welcome. We'll see you again real soon.

That's as good as it goes. Ladies and gentlemen, one more time for Aaron Heltz. Almost didn't pull him, by the way. Almost went to our final regular of the night. And what a way to finish. I mean. Holy, that was amazing. Unbelievable.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

I honestly. No joke. I got a little teary seeing him at the golden ticket because I realized

[Joe DeRosa]

it meant he'll be selling more tickets

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

than I do in a week.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It's true, too. I love it. All right. An episode like this, there's only one way to end it. And William Montgomery is sick. And Ari, Maddie added dates to his thing. And Timmy, no breaks is saving material. It takes a long time for Timmy to be able to generate the type of material that he does perform. So, boy, do I have good news for you. This regular, I think, is one of

the most promising ones we've ever had

in our entire history. He's unbelievable. Make some noise. This is a brand new minute from your new favorite comedian in the world. His name is Pat o', Neill, everybody.

[Megan Knight]

Folks,

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Hitler was born on 420,

[Layla]

and

[Mickey Genosi]

boy, did he like smoking J's.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

A lot of people are on Tik

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Tok now,

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

which just used to be what I said when I saw Muslims at the airport.

[Mickey Genosi]

Times are changing.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Last year, my little brother, he was

[Mickey Genosi]

a part of the Queers for Palestine protests. Ah, yes, Gay Muslims, better known as ghosts.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Okay, that's it.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah, Here we go.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Pat o'. Neal, you're new. I told you. He's your new favorite comedian. We're not around here anymore. This is the attitude era of Kill. Tony, that is the greatest Hitler joke I've ever heard in my entire life. 20 years I've been doing this goddamn waiting for that. Somehow it's been right there.

Mike Foya.

[Mike Benoia]

I've always wanted to see a David lynch movie do stand up.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

And you always, dude, yeah.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Oh, holy.

[Mike Benoia]

That was fantastic.

[Mickey Genosi]

It's like terrifying, but also very nice.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Just like you.

[Mike Benoia]

Just like you, Pat o'.

[Adam Lucky]

Neill.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You are the real deal. I mean, that joke, 40 some seconds of laughter. I thought about just stopping after that, but it was.

[Show Assistant]

I didn't know.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

It was great.

It was great that you just segued right into tick tock. You got a lap off your setup by just jumping into something thing, which is just great.

[Austin Gersten Schlager]

I.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You are a joke, Smith. It is incredible all the way down to the finish. Huge laughs at the opener. Huge laughs with the closer. I mean, you're doing it. You're living the dream, buddy. How do you feel?

[Mickey Genosi]

Oh, fantastic.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

The episode's coming out today where I'm a regular, so, yeah, we've taped.

We taped quite a few ahead. For those of you that might. Might not know, we take one break

per year for a few Weeks. And. And that happens late May, early June. So we tape ahead, we get a few episodes ahead so that we can actually take a once a year little vacation while also putting out episodes every Monday. So what's amazing is you're witnessing Pat o' Neal here, but people are finding out about him tonight.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

On the episode airing right now.

But he's killed so many times in a row that it's incredible that by the time they hear this, people are

gonna go, what the fuck? But then we're gonna be back one week behind again. So little fun fact. Last week we were talking at Mitzi's after the show and. Right. Was it at Mitzi's or was it on stage about the rent? Right. You. You were like. Like, you, like, had to pay your rent. And the landlord's like, yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

And you're like, look, I swear.

About to be famous as.

Yeah, yeah, stop working my job.

[Mickey Genosi]

And then they asked for pay stubs.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I was like, you got to believe me. I'm going to be famous.

Yeah. It's funny because it's happening right now in real time on the Internet. Here you are killing again, live

[Javi Bello]

on

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

one of our final tapings before that

big break that we're very excited about.

[Joe DeRosa]

That was great, man. And I feel like you're living proof that, you know, people will. Comics, older comics will bitch and go, oh, you can't do this subject anymore. You can't do that subject. Oh, Hitler jokes we've heard. No, it's like your proof that it doesn't matter what the subject is. It matters how you write it and fucking do it.

[Audience Member / Panelist]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And the venue that you do it in, you could also do it a unbelievably great set at say, like, a political rally, but it might not get the love it deserved, even if it's well written and well delivered.

[Mike Benoia]

Super refreshing delivery, too, dude.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, amazing. Always fun.

[Mike Benoia]

And I have that shirt.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Yeah, yeah.

When. When you were at the Fish concert.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Yeah.

[Mike Benoia]

At the Sphere. My whole outfit looked like that for about eight minutes.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

I love it. Pat o'. Neal, I'm so excited. You're part of our goddamn dance that we do here. Ladies, The Real Deal.

[Aaron Heltz]

Thank you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Ooh, new nickname. The Real Deal. Pat o'.

[Mickey Genosi]

Neal.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Great job there. He goes. On to the next one. And by that, I mean, that's it. We did it. Let's check in with the drawing from Chris Rogers over there. Ooh, it's Heidi. Heidi after she gets a lot of work done done for some reason. I mean, that Looks like a. What? Is that her in 20 years. The is he doing to you, Heidi? Oh, my God. Jesus, Chris.

What the.

[Joe DeRosa]

Patty cake.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Patty cake.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

What do you hate white women? What's going on over there? Ryan J E Belt's drawing is great, guys. See Mike Vanoya on tour. How funny was Mike Vanoa's debut? Mike benoia comedy. He's going everywhere. He's all over. Check out his show on SiriusXM, the Grateful Dead channel. It's called the Saturday night Shakedown with Mike Benoia. Mike, you were awesome. What a great first time on panel, dude. Awesome, bro.

[Layla]

Thank you.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

And how about one more time for the best damn band in the land? I'm kidding. One more time for Joe derosa, everybody. Come on. The man. The man it. Plug your stuff. I didn't get to ask.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

My new podcast, Violent Horrendous is out now on YMH.

[Joe DeRosa]

Please listen to it. Get it on my YouTube @Joe DeRosa Comedy.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Thank you, everybody. Thank you, Redband.

[Joe DeRosa]

Thank you, Tony.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

Thank you guys for having me.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

Joe derosa is the man. Not only is he one of the great standups in the world, Rose garden plug that too, yeah.

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

My new special, I never promised you

[Joe DeRosa]

a rose garden is also on my YouTube. Check that out as well.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

That's a Joe Duran Rosa Comedy on YouTube.

[Joe DeRosa]

Dodorosa Comedy on YouTube.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

You guys have to watch that special. If you haven't, go do that right now. I never promised you a rose garden@Joe DeRosa comedy on YouTube. One of the best specials in recent time. This episode was brought to you by Shopify to Cova's insanely our newest sponsor. We're very excited about Red Band coming

[Red Band (Tony Hinchcliffe)]

to San Diego July 9th through 11th. American Comedy Co. We love you guys.

[Tony Hinchcliffe]

God bless America. Thank you. Good night, everybody. Sam home.

[Commercial Announcer]

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