EP308: The "You Should Too" Aura, When Pain Becomes a Blueprint

Summary

Episode Overview

Podcast: Know Your Aura with Mystic Michaela
Episode: EP308: The "You Should Too" Aura, When Pain Becomes a Blueprint
Air Date: February 5, 2026
Theme:
Mystic Michaela introduces and unpacks a new "aura vocab" term, "You Should Too Blue", which describes a toxic mentality rooted in projecting one’s own past pain and suffering as a necessary blueprint for others. The episode explores the nuances between this mindset and the "Victim Blue," discusses the broader societal ramifications, and examines healing alternatives rooted in empathy and growth.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introduction of a New Aura Vocab: "You Should Too Blue"

• [00:08–01:25]
  • Michaela and Scotty discuss the importance of coining new aura terms to quickly and pointedly identify certain personality or energy types.
  • "You Should Too Blue" is introduced to label a specific, recurring energy pattern Michaela observes: people expecting others to suffer because they themselves have suffered.
  • Quote:

    "There's somebody who thinks other people should suffer because they suffered. And they think, like, the replication of the suffering gives them some sort of validation subconscious."
    – Michaela [00:27]

2. Differentiating "You Should Too Blue" from "Victim Blue"

• [01:31–04:16]

  • "Victim Blue" is an empathic, ego-driven reaction where an individual sees themselves as wronged or victimized by others' actions, often offloading emotional responsibility.
  • "You Should Too Blue" goes further; it is the insistence that others suffer as you did, seeing personal pain as a rite of passage, and validation of one’s own worth or resilience.
  • Quote:

    "Victim blue is when something happens that makes you feel bad, and then you get upset that you feel bad. ... You get mad at the person who was part of that feeling."
    – Michaela [01:58]
    "You should too blue is somebody who feels like because something happened to them, it has to happen to you, to other people. So, like, their suffering is a blueprint for how things should happen."
    – Michaela [09:41]

• Everyday family examples are hilariously and honestly shared (Scotty’s story about wanting to continue biking his daughter to school, [02:54–04:10]), showcasing "Victim Blue".

3. Manifestations of "You Should Too Blue" in Society

• [04:16–05:19, 09:41–15:23]
  • The "You Should Too Blue" mentality is often seen in parenting, workplaces, politics, and systemic practices.
  • Examples include:
    • “I paid off my student loans, so you should too.”
    • “I endured workplace harassment and survived, so why change the system?”
    • “No one helped me, so why should others get help?”
  • Michaela notes that this mindset is particularly common among people disconnected from their empathy and sometimes within political rhetoric.

4. The Spiritual & Psychological Roots

• [15:24–18:23]
  • "Blues" when balanced are natural healers and givers, but when acting from unhealed trauma or ego, manifest "Victim Blue" or "You Should Too Blue".
  • The root of "You Should Too Blue":
    • Suffering is mistaken as a virtue or badge of honor, rather than something traumatic that needs healing.
    • The person may believe their suffering is necessary for strength and thus should be universally shared.
  • Quote:

    "They see suffering as their virtue versus a traumatic event that needs to be processed."
    – Michaela [13:31]

5. Societal Systems and 3D Programming

• [18:24–21:10]
  • Michaela frames "You Should Too Blue" as an ego-driven, 3D societal program:
    • The ego clings to suffering and sameness as a means of exerting control and preventing growth.
    • This mindset actively inhibits broader social progress and healing.
  • Quote:

    "You should, too. Blue Logic is 3D programming... It's ego societal programming. ... The ego loves a society of very, like, this or that, right or wrong—very no gray areas."
    – Michaela [20:04]

6. The Need for Validation and Trauma Bonding

• [21:11–26:44]
  • Those in "You Should Too Blue" mindsets often experienced abandonment or a lack of support, leading to internalized unworthiness.
  • They seek to relate and bond with others through shared or replicated suffering.
  • Examples range from relatively benign (parenting stories) to the extremely dark (even referencing cycles of family abuse and hazing).
  • Quote:

    "It's also a way to connect to other people through trauma. ... So you need other people to be in that same vibration as you so that you're like, okay, I can relate to you now."
    – Michaela [22:58]

7. Breaking the Pattern and Healing Alternatives

• [26:45–28:58]
  • Naming and identifying the "You Should Too Blue" pattern is the first step toward neutralizing its power.
  • Validation, compassion, reframing suffering as an impetus for positive change—these are healthier alternatives.
  • Quote:

    "That's the only thing we can do, is let people know that, you know, your suffering isn't a blueprint and it's not something that has to be replicated for you to heal."
    – Michaela [28:28]

  • She expresses admiration for her community members who break these cycles, advocate for others, and turn past pain into compassion rather than perpetuating old blueprints.

---

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• On the new aura vocab:

  "New term unlocked: You Should Too Blue."
  – Scotty [07:39]

• On seeing beyond personal trauma:

  "Healing can occur when you assist in creating pathways for others not to suffer as you did."
  – Michaela [15:53]

• On systemic implications:

  "Their suffering becomes a blueprint for other people. And I'm going to talk about why."
  – Michaela [11:24]

• On the dangers of the mindset in society:

  "It doesn’t move the needle forward with society."
  – Michaela [26:03]

• Call to the community:

  "I want to hear your experiences with You Should Too Blue over on the Mystic Michaela Spiritual Family Facebook page."
  – Michaela [29:31]

---

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:08] — Introduction to the episode and aura vocab concept
• [01:31] — Distinguishing "Victim Blue" vs "You Should Too Blue"
• [04:16] — Societal and parental examples of "You Should Too Blue"
• [09:41] — Expanded explanations and real-world cases
• [15:53] — The root causes: suffering as virtue, the role of imbalance
• [18:24] — 3D societal programming and ego’s role
• [21:11] — Trauma bonding, cycles in family and society
• [26:45] — Breaking the cycle, advice for listeners
• [29:31] — Invitation for community engagement

---

Conclusion

This episode powerfully names and examines a deep societal wound: the tendency to see one’s own suffering as a universal blueprint for others, thereby perpetuating trauma cycles. With personal anecdotes, spiritual insight, and practical advice, Mystic Michaela challenges listeners to reflect on their own patterns, validate pain, and become part of a healing movement that breaks free from the "You Should Too Blue" mentality. The episode ends with an invitation to continue the discussion and self-exploration in the podcast’s community.

---

For further reflection, join the Mystic Michaela Spiritual Family on Facebook and share your experiences with “You Should Too Blue.”

Transcript

[A]

Foreign.

[B]

Michaela spiritual family. Welcome to know your aura with mystic Michaela. Today we are talking about a new know your aura. Aura vocab term unlocked. You should, too. Blue. I'm going to get into it. I'm going to talk about how this is a toxic mentality in aura color. But first. Hey, Scotty.

[A]

Hey, guys.

[B]

All right, so we have to talk about how this came about. Okay. In our regular life, I have been trying to. I've been seeing this in my, you know, just, like, life and, like, looking at people's auras and what goes on around me. And it would take me so long to explain, like, what kind of a blue aura this is. Well, there's somebody who thinks other people should suffer because they suffered. And they think, like, the replication of the suffering gives them some sort of validation subconscious. Like, that takes too long. And so I was like, scott, do you have, like, a. A fun word I could come up with? Because around here, if you're new, and I'll go way into this coming up. But if you're new, we. We like aura vocab turns, like, red rant.

[A]

Right? What? Gsd.

[B]

Gsd. Get stuff done. Auras get stuff done. Right. Like, we, like, y' all know, like, we like to come up with aura vocab terms here.

[A]

Definitely.

[B]

So I'm like, I need one for this. And you said, you should do blue.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I'm like, hey, that's good. You should do blue.

[A]

You should do blue.

[B]

So here we are. And I hope we all can use it. We can see it and shed a light on it.

[A]

We also have a couple other blue terms. Right. We have victim blue.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So what would be, I guess, the difference between victim blue?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you should, too. Blue. Now, see, sometimes I think I am victim blue.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I think you might even say on the podcast, you're acting victim blue to me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't think I've ever been. You should, too. Blue. Okay, I don't think so. I mean, I could have been, but I don't think I am. I don't. That doesn't click with me. So what would be the difference between victim blue? Yeah, and you should, too.

[B]

And I'm going to get into this coming up. But so here's a. Let me preface this by saying, like, all empath auras have these moments, because these are really conditions of the ego when empathy is kind of turned in on itself, you know, or the shadow work needs to come to light. And these are kind of symptoms of that. So we can't Be as. We can't, like, be too hard on ourselves. That's the first thing. But victim blue is when something happens that makes you feel bad, and then you get upset that you feel bad. You don't want to deal with it, so you just get mad at the person who, you know, was part of that feeling. So, for example, if someone's like, hey, when you raise your voice at me, it hurt. It hurt my feelings or whatever. And they're like, oh, my gosh, I can't say anything. You know, like, like everything. All their feelings become your fault. That's victim blue.

[A]

Right. Like, sometimes the kids accuse me of being victim blue.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, I wanted to take Abby to school.

[B]

Oh, right. Well, yeah, that's actually a really good example.

[A]

Yeah. So. And then basically, I used to always take Abby to school. We'd ride our bikes to school together.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And then one day, I got the dreaded dada.

[B]

Yeah, Dada.

[A]

Could you stay home today?

[B]

Yeah, I can take myself.

[A]

Is it your back hurting?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'm like, no, I can do it.

[B]

Right?

[A]

No, no, your back is hurting, Donna. And I'm like, no, I want to go. I want to go. And then, you know, I kind of half went that day. And then, you know, so now I don't go anymore.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And then I kind of like, make. I get into, like, that mopiness. And that would be victim blue, Right?

[B]

Correct.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Right. And the kids will call you out on it because Abby's like, you know, I can't handle his feelings. It's like, too much. It's like, it's normal for me to want to just. I'm ten. I want to bike myself the three minutes to school. But then you're, like, sitting there, like. And I'm trying to teach them, like, you're not responsible for other people's feelings when you're allowed to do something and not be responsible for someone else's feelings about it that have nothing to do with you.

[A]

Well, you know what? I don't care. I'm victim blue with you. I still want to go on that three minute bike ride. I do get a consolation prize every day. She gives me a huge hug before she leaves.

[B]

Right. You get the nice, good goodbye hug. Well, anyways, that's like a nice example of victim blue.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Some people, as you know, they can be really mean about it and rude and the same thing with you should too blue. So you should too blue. And I'm not talking about, like, the little things. I think a big place we see you should, too. Blue is in parenting. Okay. For example, these are like the benign little. Well, I walked home in the snow. I used to break snow when I walked home. And Mike, you know, they can too, you know, and that's kind of like, all right, you know. Yeah, that's a little bit of the. You should too.

[A]

Grandpa told you. You walked 14 miles.

[B]

You should too, you know, because it made me stronger. And you should build character. It's like, okay, fine. You know, these are like these little benign examples. Today we're talking about how they have major repercussions on a bigger scale when we talk about systemic types of ways that they're implicated to actually prevent people from moving forward in society because of this blueprint for suffering caused by you should. To blue aura mentalities. If that makes sense.

[A]

Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, I'm actually. And again, I don't relate to this one.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Do you think I've ever been. You should too. Blue.

[B]

Do you think I have?

[A]

No, I don't think we are.

[B]

I try not to because, like, for.

[A]

Me, it's like, if I had that problem.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I want to try to solve that for you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Kind of mentality. I don't want you to have to do that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'll try to solve it for you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

My way. Maybe I'm guilty of that. I don't know.

[B]

That could be a red or that.

[A]

Could be a red. Charming.

[B]

Let me control this. I think you. Well, that's a way that you heal. You're like, I'm gonna actually control this so that you don't go through what I go through. Because when I watch you go through, it actually triggers when I went through it. And I don't want to see that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like that kind of thing.

[A]

That could be a future term for reds.

[B]

Hold on. We're working on something. Writing a note.

[A]

Next time we got. Next time we go to the bagel.

[B]

Shop, we gotta come up with a term. But yeah.

[A]

Yeah, I would be more that. Because I don't want you to go, like, if I went through something, I don't want that person to that too.

[B]

That's normal. That's like the more 5D way of dealing with it. But some people really do need to see other people suffering. Otherwise they can't relate to them. So it's like. And I'm going to get into that. You know, I suffered, so you should suffer. And then in that place, I can relate to you and deem you worthy from a time I didn't feel worthy when I was suffering.

[A]

Okay, now we're talking. We're doing this in aura terms, obviously.

[B]

Yeah, I wonder.

[A]

And maybe you know the answer to this, maybe you don't. Maybe some of our listeners know the answer to this question. I'm going to ask, is there a mental health term for this?

[B]

I was seeing this because I've been seeing this so much in auras. You know, sometimes I go online and I'm like, all right, like, there has to be a mental health term for this. Like, there has to be some sort of psychological term. And I couldn't find one. Except that this is like a toxic mentality. I couldn't find one other than that. So this is where I ask, hey, mmsf, you're about to hear my whole spiel on this. What is it? Is there a term for it? Is that something that you would categorize as something like, I love our MMSF mental health professionals because they always have an answer or a really cool angle and I'd love them to go over on the page and tell us what they think this is and how they've seen it too, and how they see it play out and also solutions for it, how to deal with people like this. Because I'm going to get into what it is, where it really comes from in the shadow work, what it sounds like, how to deal with people like this. But I feel like, yeah, we definitely need that scope.

[A]

All right, so let's take a quick break. As the kids say today, new term unlocked. You should too blue.

[B]

Hey, Scotty.

[A]

Hey, guys.

[B]

This episode of Know youw Aura is brought to you by Wild Grain.

[A]

Oh yeah.

[B]

Wild Grain is the first bake from frozen subscription box for sourdough breads, artisanal pastries and fresh pastas. Plus, all items conveniently bake in 25 minutes or less. Unlike many store bought options, Wild Grains uses simple ingredients you can pronounce and a slow fermentation process that can be easier on your belly and richer in nutrients and antioxidants. There's no preservatives and no shortcuts. Wild Grains boxes are fully customizable. In addition to their variety box, they have a gluten free box, vegan box, and a new protein box. This weekend I made, I had the chocolate croissants.

[A]

Now I noticed you made four. I did okay. And I had mine. But guess what? One of the kids wasn't feeling so great, right? I had two.

[B]

Oh, it was amazing.

[A]

Two of the four of mine.

[B]

I want to tell you, like, it's Saturday. I preheated the oven. I took these chocolate croissants straight from the freezer, stuck them in the oven, and 20 minutes. I felt like the best mom in the world. The whole house smelled like flaky, golden chocolate croissants. We all had one. It was amazing, you know, and. And I like that. It's not, it's like, you know, like they say, it's. It's ingredients you can pronounce. So this is, like, good food. And it really keeps me fuller. I feel like all the wild Grain stuff. There's nothing like having an Artisanan bakery in your freezer to chase away the winter chill. Now is the best time to stay in and enjoy comforting homemade meals with wild grain. I highly recommend giving Wild Grain a try. Right now, Wild Grain is offering our listeners $30 off your first box plus free Croissants for Life when you go to wildgreen.com kya to start your subscription today. That's $30 off your first box and free Croissants for Life when YOU visit wildgreen.com kya or you can use promo code KYA at checkout. Let's talk about a new aura vocab term over here on Know youw Aura podcast. And it's you should too blue. I have been wanting to coin a term for this for a while, only because I've noticed it. I just would take the long way in describing it. And so kind of having those punchy words that I like to use over here, like red rant or y' all know, or victim blue or hot mess purple. It's just an easier way to kind of talk about a concept. And you should too. Blue is kind of like a toxic mentality. I'm going to talk about it, and I don't really notice it a lot with you guys. Like when I do readings or when I meet you guys, like, I don't really see the you should do blue so much. I see it a lot with, like, people out there that aren't really in touch with their empathy. And honestly, since I've been doing my substack, a lot of people in the political spectrum tend to have this, which is really scary. But I used to see it when I was teaching, too, with sometimes the parents and sometimes just kind of like people who don't understand that just because something happens to you doesn't mean it has to happen to other people. So let's get into it. The origins of you should too blue. So you should too blue is somebody who feels like because something happened to them, it has to happen to you, to other people. So, like, their suffering is a blueprint for how things should happen. And I'm going to get into that. It's different. It's kind of like victim blue, but different. Victim blue, when I talk about that, are people who are so sensitive that any perceived slight turns into a victimization of themselves. And then before I even go back into that blue in general, the blue aura color, blues, when they're balanced, are healers, givers. And they enjoy really manifesting God's light in other people and all people that they come into contact with. And what I mean by that is, is when they give to somebody and they know it makes a difference and that person's received it and they're in a space where they can pay it forward or they feel seen, you feel God's light in them and in yourself at the same time. And I call God's light just that sort of spiritual connection that you create through compassionate, empathic, selfless giving. And I see. This is why I see blue auras in these types of fields. I see them working with children. I see them working with the elderly. I see them as therapists, caretakers, teachers, social workers. These are people who just show up for you when you need them without even asking. They just want to give to you. And. And they do their best when they give to people who receive and pay it forward, not pay it back to them necessarily, just pay it forward. So you're. That's why they do so well giving to populations of, like, for, you know, children or those in need or whatnot. Like, I give to you. I validate you. I see you, and I'm replicating that feeling of that which is greater than us seeing you. Like, you have worth. And let me demonstrate you have worth by giving and healing you even without knowing you. I'm just gonna do it. That's blue aura. When they are balanced. And honestly, that's most of the blues I come in contact with. But auras are not excuses, but they can explain behaviors, meaning your intention is your own. Okay? Auras are just how you act it out. So when you have your own issues, you know, your imbalance, whatever unhealed trauma, whatever it is, and you happen to be blue, you can act out a certain way, and one of them is victim blue. So those are the types of people that you definitely know that, you know, if. Oh, man, I forgot to invite them. Now they. They're going to be all mad at me or you, you know. You know, if you Say something that's just a little bit of constructive criticism. They just take it to heart. So you avoid. You avoid hurting these people's feelings because then they will label you as a perpetrator to their victim. So that's victim blue, but you should, too. Blue are people who have had some sort of trauma in their life, but then think that everybody else needs to have that trauma too. So let me give you some examples of what a you should to. Blue sounds like you should chew. Blues are people who say something like, well, I had student debt and I clawed my way through it. So ever, you know, I don't think we should eliminate student debt. Or I didn't have money to go to college and I didn't go. So you either work for it or you don't. But I don't think we should fund that. Or. I had to deal with a bad boss. I was harassed. I was verbally accosted. I was sexually harassed. But it made me tougher. So I don't know what all these laws are about, about workplace behavior. I didn't have health care as a kid, so these kids shouldn't have it either. I didn't see a dentist until I was 22. Why do my tax dollars go to these people getting it for free? I was hit as a kid. My dad beat the crap out of me, made me stronger, made me tougher. Okay? So I've got no problem whacking my kid. It happened to me. I'm good. Kids bully one another. That's just a rite of passage. Happened to me, should happen to them. I don't know what all this nonsense about, you know, being kind to each other is. No one helped me with childcare. I was a single mom. I had to work three jobs. Nobody paid for my childcare. Nobody stepped in and helped me. So I don't want my tax dollars going to that. So if you've heard these things, that's. You should too blow. And it's very common. And there's a difference between, like, life happens and you want other people to suffer the exact way you did. So here's the thing. Like, life is hard. And when we want to protect people or shelter people from things, it doesn't mean we're sheltering them from everything. It just means that we're trying to help in places where we know there's a problem. You know, and the difference between that is you should. Two blue people usually use the logic that, well, life is hard. And that's just what happens. It's like, yeah, of Course. But we just recognized a problem that we could solve. So it doesn't have to be hard in that specific way. It'll be hard, trust me, in a gazillion other ways for these people. But maybe this one way it won't be because we can fix that. Again, their suffering becomes a blueprint for other people. And I'm going to talk about why. Usually you should two blue people. This is. They've gone through something really, really sad. Okay. And they see suffering as their virtue versus a traumatic event that needs to be processed. A lot of times these people don't understand that healing can occur when you assist in creating pathways for others not to suffer as you did. As you see these moments where you suffered as learning moments. Oh, wait. This was a way in which I can see and I can help other people not have to go through that. Cause I did. Which is healing. And that's more 5D. And that's actually what your soul wants you to do. I remember watching the local news a long time ago. I think I even talked this on the podcast. Cause it was just so. It really affected me and this woman. Oh, and I'm in Florida, and in Florida you get like free. I guess in Palm beach county, at least you get free preschool. They'll give you. It's called vpk. It's free preschool. And this. They were asking a woman about, well, what do you think about this? And she's like, well, I had to take care, pay for my own preschool and nobody helped me. And I was a single mom, so I don't think other people should have that. And I was like, oh, my gosh. That doesn't mean other people should go through what you did. That means it's terrible what you went through. And it's actually awful that you went through that. I'm so sorry that you didn't have support. And if somebody before you didn't think the way you're thinking right now, you would have had support. You know what I mean? It's like we have to stop the suffering somewhere. And a lot of us who do that have suffered ourselves and recognize it as traumatic enough. We don't want other people to suffer that way. And we don't need to have them suffer to feel validated in our own pain. That makes sense. So the you should too logic is, I did it. You should do it too. But here's the thing, and this is like such an important thing to understand. You should, too. Blue Logic is 3D programming. This is ego societal programming. What's your ego. Ego is the human part of you that keeps you alive in this physical realm. We love the ego. Okay. It's great. It does definitely keep you here and working. But it doesn't like to change. It doesn't like you to do anything different. And the ego loves a society of very like this or that, right or wrong, Very. A lot of duality, very no gray areas with the ego. And the ego will trick you into making sure that you're not in situations where your soul evolves. And they like to do this by keeping everything the same. So this you should too. Blue logic, I suffered, so should you. In the same way is just 3D programming that makes sure everyone's kept down so that the entire society. So society doesn't move the needle. That's what it's for. So they like as a whole, we don't change, we don't evolve. We don't level up. Because in a society where we take care of each other differently, more soul evolution can occur when everyone feels validated and worth something. It's very much rooted in resentment. It's a very backwards way of validating something that they went through themselves. And instead of protecting others from experience, you want them to suffer when you're in this mentality so that you can bond through that suffering. Just like the person that hits their kids while I was hit. So I'm going to hit my kids. See, see? Okay, it wasn't so bad what happened to me because I just did it to my kid. So, so now it's good. And this is. This is something that can be very subconscious. Once you see it, you're like, oh, my gosh, I'm perpetuating something just because I didn't process my own emotion from it. It's very much blocking of your ability to process emotions. Because again, the ego loves when you don't process emotions because that means you can't change, level up, connect spiritually, evolve. It is also a way to connect to other people through trauma. Like you went through something bad that you haven't really processed or healed from or understood completely or come to terms with. So you need other people to be in that same vibration as you so that you're like, okay, I can relate to you now. Kind of like if you go through what I went through, I can understand you, I can sympathize with you, I can deem you worthy, you know, because a lot of times with the you should chew blue. Something happened to this person where they did not feel worthy. Nobody came, nobody helped Them with money, Nobody helped them with childcare, nobody helped them with health care. They were vulnerable, they were alone, they were unseen. They felt unworthy at this time. And you seeing somebody else going through the same thing, you're like, ah, okay, they are too. Therefore, I'm not alone. I wasn't isolated. Other people go through this too. So it's kind of a very backwards way of feeling seen when somebody else says, like, oh my God, that's awful what that person went through. It's like, well, I went through that too. And it becomes like a virtue, a badge of honor versus a traumatic experience that you should have learned from and now, you know, try to avoid other people going through. It's also, you know, especially when I see this in family situations. I won't hate you if you went through what I went through. I mean, the amount of times I see this in family systems, not just in society, but like in from your own parents or something, you know. Oh, well, I got divorced young too, so, you know, I. You went through this with this terrible partner and I did too. You know, it's kind of like becomes like this bonding thing. Instead of protecting them from it or helping them or being there in a different way, it's like, well, let's bond through it. And I'm not saying that it's not normal to bond through trauma. Of course it is. It's called relating to somebody. But if you're doing things to actually create a system in which that can happen and should happen and you're proud of them for it happening, that is. You should too blue, which is a different type of twisted logic. And you also, like, when you're a. You should chew blue. You like to externalize your unprocessed pain into others. So watching people on the news suffer, you know, something that you suffered but you got through or you scrambled out of. You're like, you know, or you didn't, but you survived. You're like, okay, yeah, it's. It really comes from a place of sadness, isolation, feeling unworthy, and a lot of pain. It's really also hard for these people a lot of times to relate to other people at all empathetically because they felt abandoned in a time of their own pain. So I think. And this is where it gets really dark. It's kind of like seeing people go like, like, I mean, you could go real dark here. You could be like children being trafficked, who usually traffics them most of the time. It's like their own family members and stuff. It's like, how do you do that? Will probably happen to them, you know, so that, that pattern of, well, it happened to me so it can happen to you so we can be the same is, you should too, blue. It's just like, no, it's okay. It happened to me. It happened to you. All right, so this is what we do. Like that. I mean, that's my darkest example I could possibly think of, but you get the idea. And also, just like in just everyday life, hazing, the practice of hazing to join the frat, join the sorority, join the friend group, be part of a club, be part of a workspace. Suffering earns you a spot, you know, and then once you do it, it's like a pat on the back. Like, ah, yeah, that was, that was really degrading. Welcome. Because I was degraded too, to get here, so I can't be friends with you unless you were also degraded. I mean, how do you deal with a. You should too, blue. First of all, a lot of it sometimes has to do with like, like I said at the beginning, like health care, child care, money, student payments, things like that. You know, sometimes it's like society's resources, if you weren't, if you didn't feel like you were allocated them, like a lot of the. You should too, blue. People think nobody should have these things. Which, you know, again, doesn't move the needle forward with society. So it's kind of like the logic to me is like the world is different, you know, it's way harder to buy a house than it was for our grandparents to buy a house. Okay, so you can't like use that same. They worked hard, you know, logic. It's like, well, we're there every. They're working hard too. It's just like out of reach grocery. Everything's completely not affordable anymore. It's harder to retire. That's like a fantasy, you know, it's harder to think about how am I going to take care of my aging parents. Like, there's so many different things going on now where there's no social support, where in the past there was. And it's kind of like, well, the logic is people do need more support in different areas now because there's different hardships than perhaps when you went through them. And it's kind of like another thing is kind of validating their pain. If you really know someone well enough and you hear them kind of like passively or flippantly being like, well, I went through it, so they should too. Maybe it's a friend, maybe it's a sibling or something. And it's like, well, you know, I'm really sorry that happened to you. It really shouldn't have happened to you. It shouldn't happen to anybody. Honestly, like, what happened to you shouldn't happen to anyone. And yes, you got through it, and yes, you're stronger for it, and yes, you learned a lot, but there's other ways to learn these things, and there's other contexts in which you're going to get strong and learn things other than that particular context. Like, I don't think that that's a necessary thing for society to replicate. You know, just kind of validating their pain and. And then explaining that doesn't have to happen, though, for people to be worthy or learn a lesson. The I suffered, like, so should you mindset is something that is so part of our system. And I feel like when we name it, like we're trying to do today here on this podcast, you can take a step back and you can shine a light on it. And that is my purpose of talking about the you should, too. Blue mindset is, let's name it, you should chew blue shines a light on it. And then as soon as you do that, it shrivels and it loses its power and it loses its impact. And we're able to take a step back, not just in other people that we encounter that have this, but it's a human thing to say. Like, well, I did that solicit, too, you know, like, well, I went through that. I'm sure, like, even listening, I can relate to it in very small ways as well. I'm sure all of you can relate to it in little ways in your life. Like, oh, yeah, I have. I did. I have thought that before. Okay, okay, I got it. You know, like, it's an ego mentality. So we all have it somewhere. Some people just live by it. And when we see it in ourselves and we shrivel it up, we can then lend that light to other people and hopefully shrivel that up, too. That's the only thing we can do, is let people know that, you know, your suffering isn't a blueprint and it's not something that has to be replicated for you to heal. It's not helpful. The other way that we heal is that we provide. We get the lessons from that time and we provide ways in which to make sure nobody has to go through that again. And by the way, I do see that happening with so many of you who I read, so many of you are taking the awful things that you went through growing up or just in life in general, and taking it, taking a step back and being like, I don't want anybody else to go through that, and, and making sure that you're speaking out and healing and being an advocate for those who need it. I see you guys doing this as parents. You're raising your kids in ways where it heals yourself because you're doing it different. Or I see people joining friend groups and doing self care. And again, ways that heal themselves in ways that make sure that this isn't replicated. So I'm really proud of you all, and I want to hear your experiences with. You should, too. Blue over on the Mystic Michaela Spiritual Family Facebook page. You know, this podcast is for you and about you, and I'm so glad you spent some time with us today.

[A]

Today.