
Use our code for 10% off your next SeatGeek order*: https://seatgeek.onelink.me/RrnK/LAPLATICA10 Sponsored by SeatGeek. *Restrictions apply. Max $20 discount $500 GIVEAWAY! How to enter: sign up to Whatnot using my link https://www.whatnot.com/invite/LaPlatica and follow me on Whatnot. Winner will be picked in a month. #whatnotpartner * Get $15 off your first purchase on Whatnot using this link 👉🏼 https://www.whatnot.com/invite/LaPlatica Marriage coach Kaseena Birnbaum has gone mega viral online for posting "taboo" content that is provocative and thought provoking, but the advice she shares might be just what you need. Whether you're trying to save your marriage (just like she was), or just trying to think about sex in a different way, this conversation helped us learn how to be better communicators altogether. Check out Kaseena and Tyler online! IG: https://www.instagram.com/makingmarriagesexy? TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@makingmarriagesexy? IG: https://www.instagram.c...
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Casina
One of my most viral. It's pinned right now. It's called the hoe method.
Josh Laver
I think that's the one. Yeah.
Casina
And it. It talks about how, like, my husband's biggest dream was for me to be a hoe for him. If you have 15 minutes and your husband's favorite thing is a blowjob, what are you gonna do? You gonna wash the dishes? You're gonna give him a kiss? Are you gonna, like, what is right? What is the best thing? Like, and this is the thing that makes him walk taller, feel better? Like, this is the thing that, like, so you're like, in your head, you're like, I'm just like, roi. Okay.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And the guy has to understand those. The effects of what that's happening, right? Like, what's happening when they're watching porn.
Casina
For sure. You get that quick fix and then the long term plan fails because you're constantly getting fed somewhere else, you know, and so, like, yeah, I think when they. When they hear it in that light, like, it's something that we have talked about in our course. Like, when you hear it in that light, it's like very much. Oh, it's like an aha moment. It's like, I'm not saying that what you're doing is bad. I'm just saying you're. You're getting the wrong appetite. And then by default, you. You don't even know you're giving your marriage sloppy seconds.
Josh Laver
There's one thing that I'm going to talk about always, and that is SE baby. This video is sponsored by SE number one red ticketing app on the App Store. Use se. Guys, look, I'm going work backwards. We saving money.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Always.
Josh Laver
We've been saving money. Use code la platica and you get 10% off your ticketed purchase. Just like that. La Platica. 10. Actually, it's not La Platica. La Platica. 10. 10% off your next equity purchase. Now why Siki app is easy to use. Green dot means good. Red dot means. You know how many times it saved me on date night? Seatgeek. And the world Cup's right around the corner.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
That's right, guys. He hit all the talking points I need. I'm just here to let you guys know I love seatgeek. I know you guys love seatgeek. You guys always bring up seatgeek when you guys see us out in the ballot, tell us, like, what you guys use it for, and honestly, makes me very happy. Especially when you use our code to save some Money. La Platica 10. 10% off your ticket to purchase. Remember, you guys know how it goes. Green dot means good, red dot means bad. If you're a new listener and you haven't downloaded SeatGeek, click the link below, get it on your phone. Check it out. Over 75,000 live events. There's always something to do on the SeatGeek app. We'll see you guys in 12.4 seconds. I'm gonna use it.
Casina
Let me be honest.
Josh Laver
Every guest is a privilege.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Do we wanna go there?
Josh Laver
Yes, Jolly. Cause I'm on a podcast with Josh Laver. Hell yeah. You have too, mother.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Ladies and gent, you let me just tell you.
Josh Laver
Welcome, everybody. It's Monday, right? I mean, technically not right now, but it's Monday with you guys. This is la platica and I haven't said it yet, but. And we need to start saying it again. I don't know why we keep forgetting it. Number one Latino podcast in the world. But that's only.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Never said. You forgot the whole phrase.
Josh Laver
But we never said it. It's only according to Google. Check it out. Honestly, a lot of people don't believe.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Put it in your little Google machine. See what happens. I don't know.
Josh Laver
Put it in the Google machine. Now. Today is a special day. But before I mention who's on the podcast today, I just want to say that this episode is sponsored by SeatGeek, the number one. I was gonna say no more Latino podcast in the world again. Number one rated ticketing app on the App Store. Guys, the World cup is around the corner.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Olay.
Josh Laver
Ole. Olay, motherfucker.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
That's what it is, man.
Josh Laver
Okay.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Get your tickets, baby.
Josh Laver
The Josh Leyva sitting right in front of me.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Come on, man.
Josh Laver
And today we have a special guest. It's somebody that I've actually hit up for Must because I find her content very intriguing. It, like, speaks to me. Especially someone who's been married.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Wait, been? Oh, my God. Is married.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Sorry, I had a long weekend. I love Michelada stuff. And even if you're not down a lot, Brain fog is still here. But I have something special today. It's our friend Casina. And she goes by Making Marriage sexy.
Casina
Yes.
Josh Laver
A marriage counselor and marriage coach. Marriage.
Casina
Yes, yes, yes.
Josh Laver
Okay, got that. Marriage coach. And her content is super intriguing.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Helps out many. But content can also be a little bit on the. How do you say it? Kind of like a lot of controversy with people.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Which is why we're here.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
And I don't find it like that. I Actually find it very helpful. Some of the things, yeah, I relate to a lot, and I think that's why I wanted to bring her over. I spoke with the team, and they're actually from Arizona, but they made it in here. So we're very grateful for you guys to be here. And I wanted everybody to just kind of sit down with her, follow her, and because she's a super sweet young lady, and I'm excited for the conversations we're gonna have today.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And just a little side note for the audience, her husband is sitting right across from her, and he's gonna. We're gonna actually bring him on a little bit later, so stay tuned. I'm very excited to talk to you, Casina. I want you to kind of give a little background, like, who you are and how you got to this point. Now you do making social media content.
Casina
Yeah, for sure, I can. So I think back to, like, 10 plus years ago. We started coaching people really more in, like, the E commerce space and business world.
Josh Laver
Wow.
Casina
And so we. We quickly realized, like, the more people. People made a lot more money when they had their marriages, like, on lock. Like, they literally, when they were doing so good in their marriage, everything else was thriving flows. And so we were like. We just kind of niched down over time and realized, like, okay, like, this is an area where, like, I mean, I came from four divorces on my dad's side, two divorces on my mom. So just within my own family, like, my own parents experience, like, six different, like, marriages. It was just like, whoa. Like, I don't. I didn't want to get married.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
And so I was very scared of it. I was like, actually kind of grew up saying, like, I'm probably going to get divorced, like, three times.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
Like, that was just what I thought, you know? Isn't that crazy?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
It really is. And, like, it's kind of funny just to, like, add to that point. So my. And I'm sorry, Mom, I'm gonna call you out here. My mom's been divorced three times as well, but she is thriving. So her life has been so much better when she wasn't married. But I will say I have kind of dealt with the repercussions of, like, being afraid of marriage as well, just like you do, you know? And there's parts of me where I have to admit I've even had thoughts of, like, I guess divorce isn't that bad because my mom's fine. But, like, that's. That's. That's a terrible mindset to have Right. The goal is to make it work. Right. Not, like, see if it works. It's like, we're going to make it.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
Well, there could have been so many times where we didn't make it work because we are, quote unquote, too different.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Sure.
Casina
Or like, we just, you know, we were like. People say, oh, we drifted apart. We have different interests. But I'm like, I just feel like people are way too quick to exit. And like, how would. If people took more responsibility within themselves, I just know that so many more people would be selfless and they could prosper and they could do better. It's just a matter. And there are some people I do really believe should. Should go that. That route. You know, divorce is the right thing. But I do feel oftentimes there's just. There's a lot more people that can make it work. And then when they go to that next marriage, they bring the same baggage and it's like, well, you just didn't fix the thing that really needed to
Josh Laver
get fixed, which is you.
Casina
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Exactly. So I just find, I mean, there's so many times where I could have looked at him, been like, he's just this, this and this. And everybody around me socially would have been like, you know what? Good for you. Yeah, like, you know what? You deserve someone better. It kind of like that, that movement of like, you know, you deserve better. Like, don't deal with that. Like, and it's like we came from not making very much money at all. Just such a place of, like, toxicity, not making a lot of money, like, didn't have a lot going for ourselves. And through that, we have come up and, like, personally grown, we've hired coaches, we've taken personal responsibility. We've never been on the same page completely, like, now I would say more than ever. But we've always been on different pages, growth wise.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
But we've allowed ourselves to. We've given each other space to grow. And I think that's where a lot of people come in and they're like, well, he's just not here. And it's like, okay, give him some time. Like, you go do your thing.
Josh Laver
You know?
Casina
And I think that's where. When I think about just all the divorces when I grew up, like, I just never saw a marriage that I was like, oh, that's the one.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Something you want to model?
Casina
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. I. I have to admit, neither have I. Yeah. So you've actually created that model and continue to learn and grow. Right.
Casina
And yeah. I mean, it'll be 10 years of actual marriage because we were together for a couple years before next year. And like, I. I don't say this in any way to brag or to be like, hey, like, we're the best, like, but everyone around us, like, we are just like the foundation of our relationship. And the communication, I just feel like is. Is infectious and we just have. So we're just best friends.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know, that's so cool.
Casina
You know, and. But, like, also, like, we're cons. Every year it's like, leveling up to do better. Like, the next project, the next thing. We're communication every area. It's like spiritually growing. And I feel like that is when you really are thriving because you're. You're. I wouldn't say you're essentially always equally yoked, like, spiritually yoked, but you're constantly helping each other get better.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
And I think that that is just when a marriage is unstoppable. Is. You know.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. So you mentioned that you were. You were. Guys were receiving coaching together.
Casina
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Prior to you.
Casina
Like, when I. I was coaching with a wife and he was coaching with a husband.
Josh Laver
Oh, okay.
Casina
Cool.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And is that what inspired you to become a coach yourself?
Casina
Honestly, through those years of different coaches? Because we've had business coaches. We've had coaches that helped those business coaches helped us in marriage.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
Through the different experiences, through marriage books, we kind of just realized and putting clients content out online. So we had been coaching for years off of line. It was about a year and a half ago, maybe almost in July will be two years, where we started posting online. So everything was referral. Like, we kind of were resistant to social media because we're like, I don't know, you know, like a whole posting thing. And I'm such a. I was off social media for about 10 years. Like, didn't even, like, do anything. And so when I went back on, I, like, I did not think I was going to be talking about blowjobs and sex. And like, like, I was like, when I grew up, I don't talk about blow jobs online. Like, never in my wildest dreams. And like, having my mom see me on social media, like, hey, mom.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
But we. We hired a business coach to help us build a brand to bring our coaching to life. And we know that, like, going viral, you talk about really, like, hot topics.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Right.
Casina
And on TikTok, I kind of started on TikTok because TikTok, I felt like, more brave. I don't know why. Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know Like, I kind of get that. Yeah.
Casina
It's like I, like, I don't know, it was like the wild west. So I was like, okay, I'm gonna start like putting out content. Yeah. Like, I don't really know a lot of people on Tick Tock. So I was putting out content. And then I, I did this story about how my husband had this like, sex. Sex talk with me and shared with me, like, you know, on a deeper level how, like when I don't initiate and what, like before marriage, how I was and like now post, you know, years of being together, being kind of like in that roommate mode. Like how, like if I'm not initiating and I'm. If I'm not present, if I'm tired, if I'm checked out, like what it does to his, like, to his confidence.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
And like what it does to like, like just him as a person.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
And if he can't get sex anywhere else because we're married, then like for him it's like what. It just crushed him. And when he really was able to share that at a deeper level, I felt like, like when I shared that online, it just went wild.
Josh Laver
Yeah. Have you ever tried to find something online and then just is gone?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Dude, all the time. Like it never existed.
Josh Laver
So I found out about this app. It's called what not I saw in a commercial. I got it.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
You got it?
Josh Laver
I got it.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Well, what is it?
Josh Laver
It's basically like a live stream shopping app. It's like number one right now. And it's like live auctions. So like people are on there and they're like, they're selling a bunch of stuff. There's a bunch of categories. It can be baseball cards, electronics, tools, anything.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
No way. Let me see.
Josh Laver
Yeah, look, let me show you. Oh, wait, it's like live, Live. Yeah, it's like live like people. You can actually be talking to people and they're constantly selling things.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
This is right now.
Josh Laver
This is right now. And there's like a limit of time. So you can just bid and you can get things for the low, low. So how does it work? So you basically log on. Okay, there's a bunch of categories. Men's fashion, sports, cars, electronics, tools. You click on it and then it's easy. There's a time limit. You just swipe to bid and you bought it.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Okay, let me see. Okay, try to buy this right here.
Josh Laver
Okay, I will.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh, dude, there's a timer.
Josh Laver
Yeah, there's a timer.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh, you're getting nervous. Don't get nervous.
Josh Laver
Look, I Got two seconds. Look, I got it.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh, my God.
Josh Laver
Dude. I only got it for, like, 10 bucks.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Dude, this is exciting. The price that you got it at, that's like a steal.
Josh Laver
Yeah, you're not gonna find that price anywhere else, guys. If you guys want to try whatnot, use our link or the QR code here on the screen, and you'll get your first 15 off your first purchase.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
I'm going to create us an account.
Josh Laver
Yes.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And if you guys want to follow us on whatnot, you guys can. You guys can see what we're buying and stuff. And on top of that, I just got told by our producer that you guys are going to be entered a chance to win $500 of credit.
Josh Laver
That's like, a lot of stuff.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
That's like 500.
Josh Laver
Especially on whatnot. Winner gets picked in a month.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh, and shout out to your husband, because as a man, that takes a lot of vulnerability to be able to. To, like, open up and even know how to open up.
Josh Laver
Right.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Like, I feel like guys struggle with, like, finding ways to communicate and actually verbalize what they're feeling, their emotions are going through. And then on top of that, having the safe space and that in that comfortability from their partner to, like, receive that and not judge them and take that and want to, like, grow and help the relationship genuinely. Right.
Josh Laver
It goes to show, like, that you guys are actually best friends because the fact that he, like, goes out his way and actually, because that's tough to say, you know, especially he maybe doesn't even want to offend you either, you know, like, sex with me, you know, because we always talk about all the time. And Josh, we're pretty good at, you know, trying to be vulnerable and allowing the girls back at home and the guys to understand to, you know, talking about difficult topics. Like, this is a muscle that we have to train. Right. And that's the video that really put me on with. With you, Casina, because I was like, yeah, this kind of, like, speaks to me, and I wanted to ask you, like, what were the first steps of, you know, after he told you that? Like, what. And I'm not saying, like, maybe you have, like, the absolute right answers for the whole world. Right. Every relationship might be different. Yeah, but what did you do?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Can we give context for people who haven't seen the video? Okay. What exact video he might be referring to?
Casina
There's a lot.
Josh Laver
Yeah, there is a lot. But I.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
This is about, like, opening up to your partner about, like, specific things that
Josh Laver
you're looking for and more it was like, along the lines of, you were telling. He told you that, and, you know, it was something that you had to change and why my. Why my marriage almost failed or something like that. Yeah. She has so many.
Casina
One of my most viral. It's pinned right now. It's called the hoe method.
Josh Laver
I think that's the one. Yeah.
Casina
And it's. It talks about how, like, my husband's biggest dream was for me to be a hoe for him. And, like, you want, like, he. I'm his only. You know, I'm his prized possession. Like, he loves me so much, and he just wants me to desire him and love him and to build him up and to do those things at, like, obviously, hoe is a context for, like. Like, I'm speaking to it. It's a marketing tool in the sense where it's like, I'm doing extra and above for my husband only. But I would say in this sense, like, I'm sorry, can you remind me of the question? Am I just talking about.
Josh Laver
No. Yeah. We were just first giving context of, like, kind of, like the real and, like, letting people at home know, like, what that video was for you guys to kind of help each other out and go to the next step. Because you were basically saying that the relationship was failing a bit when it's, you know, about.
Casina
For sure.
Josh Laver
Your sex life.
Casina
For sure. For sure. I think so. When he shared that with me, like, it was my first epiphany that, like, men are not just, like, animalistic and, like, I think movies in media portrays guys to be like, they only want one thing and they just want to get off and that's it. And, like, once they get off, they're fine. And it was just kind of like this feeling. We're like, okay, well, if I just lay there and, like, do you get. Do what you need to do?
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And, like, then should you check that box?
Casina
Check the box. Right? And I. I just. Because in my brain, I was never taught or educated otherwise that he needed to feel wanted and desired. So for me, it was like, okay. Like, that was me showing up. So when he shared that, it actually even sometimes felt worse. Or he was pissed because after I just laid there and didn't care, it was like, okay, I. The first thing. My first feeling was like, okay, I'm so sorry, because I don't want to make you. I never wanted to make you feel this way. But I started to go, okay, well, why? Like, what is it? Why do I feel this way? I had to start to take Accountability of like, sure, what are, what's the stuff deep down in my heart that makes me so resistant to becoming more playful with my husband.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Wow.
Casina
And I think that that was the hard part for me. And I think that's the hard part. A lot of people, you know, they go to divorce and the easy route is exiting the relationship first. Oh, maybe I'm just more into other people or maybe I'm just more, more, you know, this next person I'll be more like, want to have sex with more. And in this sense, it was like, well, he's a good man. Like, he, he, he, he is. He brings so much to our marriage. Like, why don't I want to? Like, I'm a young person. It's not my libido. You know, why don't I. And I had to address things within of like, maybe I'm. I haven't worked out in a year. Maybe I don't feel sexy.
Josh Laver
Got it.
Casina
You know, maybe I'm not growing in my life. And so like, it's such a vulnerable thing. And maybe, maybe it was my upbringing. You know, I grew up with my mom's side, like in the religion in itself. Just felt very hush hush and like, not like we couldn't ask questions. I asked to get on like birth control at some point and my mom was like, oh, you're not having sex. You know, not. Because she, she just didn't know any better. Like, and she grew up, she said like she thought she was gonna get pregnant from making out. Like, that was like how much she was educated.
Josh Laver
Wow.
Casina
In from her grandparents, her parents. So just I had to like, go through this journey of like, well, if this is one of my husband's top, like, ways of feeling wanted, like, this is a 10 out of 10 importance for him.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
I need to do the work to figure out why I don't want to show up there consistently. Because it's easy to do it once.
Josh Laver
Sure.
Casina
I used to always have to drink to be sexual and like, drink to really want.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Let yourself go there.
Casina
Yeah. To be extra and fun. And then I'm like, like you guys said, like, that's not sustainable. Like, I can't drink every day.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Casina
Right. Not just for that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. Yeah.
Casina
And so it was just like a. Okay. Like, I'm sober. Like, I, like, how do I get myself to this point? So I've been on this journey of figuring out, like, what, like, what are the things that are blocking me, what are the beliefs, the limiting beliefs that I have from like, what your sex Life should be with your partner. Why do I feel insecure? What do I need to do to show myself some love so that I can feel that feminine essence and, like, truly want to let my guard down and. And. And be present in that area?
Josh Laver
And what are some of those things that have helped you out as of now? Like, you said, like, working out. I don't know.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Maybe this.
Casina
It's. Honestly, it's different for everybody. I feel like I'm, like, I'm super, like, a business girly. So I love, like, if I'm productive and I'm doing things, like, and knocking things out, like, and growing.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
You feel fulfilled?
Casina
I feel very fulfilled. Yeah. No Sagittarius. Okay. That. That being in growth mode is really, really important for me to feel like. Like, I'm Can. I'm contributing. I'm pouring love on myself so then I can give to others. Working out is really helpful. But even with all of that, I think it's just being selfless. Really realizing how selfish it could be to. To really withhold something that is so important. That's like, okay, I should keep reminding myself like, this. Like, if you have 15 minutes and your husband's favorite thing is a blow job, what are you gonna do? You're gonna wash the dishes? You're gonna give him a kiss? Are you gonna. Like, what is. Like, what is the best thing? Like? And this is the thing that makes him walk taller, feel better. Like, this is the thing that, like, so you're, like, in your head, you're like, I'm just like, roi. Okay, like, this. This is the best ROI for my time. Like, this is so I just started to think, like, a business in my mind.
Josh Laver
15 minutes, ladies.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
If you got it.
Casina
Maybe, you know, maybe less.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Wow.
Josh Laver
Yeah. Hey, less. Sometimes I feel like 15 minutes too long. Let's just get to it.
Casina
Most of the time.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
But that's generous.
Josh Laver
Yeah. Yeah.
Casina
But essentially, I just started to hack my own brain. Like, okay, we, like, we were one of our. So our coaches at the time, like, years ago were like, hey, we want you guys to never go. Like, here's a rule of thumb. Like, never go longer than 72 hours without having sex or being intimate. And that was really hard at first because I was like. It was kind of like that checklist. Like, okay, 72 hours is the day. We both put it. We put it in our calendar, and it was just, like, it just forced. It caused me to grow. Like, why. Why do I feel, like, so resistant? Like, this. This is my partner. Like, you Go to work, you give your best, you go to all, you do all these things, you put on a smile for everybody else. And it's really like, if it's good, it could be five minutes. Like, you could show up five minutes for your partner and it would be a great time. But it's like, so it's not a lack of time. And that's where I started to wrestle with like, why, like so many wives. And I hear them because I have two kids, a seven month old and a three year old. Like, I hear you, like you're tired, but like five minutes is not a long time.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Right.
Casina
If you're into it and you're doing your thing. So it's like if you really had to show up. And I also, also started to realize that it's for both people. It's not just for the husband to feel happy. Like, this is a time where you feel connected and after you, you're just, you're. I believe you're more spiritually bonded.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, I agree.
Casina
You know, I believe that you, you're nicer to each other, you're softer, like you can have better conversations, you know, post that I always tell women, wait until after you guys do that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
It opens you up in a different light.
Casina
For sure, for sure, for sure. And so those were the things that like, I just really wrestled with my own, like limitations and my own and a lot of selfishness. Like, well, I want him to do this first or I want, I want him to make more money first or I want him to do this or do that. And it's like, then I'll, then I will get to that point. But then I had a coach tell me, like, you need to go first. Like you need to be the one to go first. And you're really like, you can change your entire relationship by going first. And so I started just like submitting of like being like, okay, you know what? I want him to do 10 other things. Of course I want our life to be different. There's so much that I don't want to be happening in this moment. But like, what if I just showed up and I started to consistently do that more and more and I felt like he started moving 10 times as fast.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Wow.
Casina
Like, it was just like, wow. Like he cares so much and he loves me so much, but it's like I activated him in a whole new way because I saw him and I. He felt respected and he'll talk about this himself. Yeah, but we, and you know, to get to this point, like you had Mentioned, like, we are best friends and we were able to talk about this, but we went years of growing to, like, get to that point.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
You know.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. And that's. I mean, you have to do that individual work yourself first.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Right.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And then there's work you guys got to do within your guys's relationship as well.
Casina
And that's all the work people miss when they go for a divorce most of the time.
Josh Laver
And, you know, having these conversations is really good because it. If you have that type of conversation, it can lead up to some other ones that are, you know, just as crazy. Not really crazy, but just as vulnerable. Right. Like, for example, guys are guys. We hang out with our boys all the time. And you can probably admit to this too, but when I'm with my guy friends and somebody's having problems, but for me personally, sex is good. Everything is good back at home. You know how good you look in my head when I'm around my boys that their girl or guy is not doing anything like that they're not getting. The guys aren't being fulfilled. Like, that makes me love my partner even that much more because I know that back at home, I'm like, y' all tripping, but I'm the king back at home. And that makes me, like, feel even more like somebody who is important, respected, Right? Because I think guys just want to be respected, right? So if you feel like you're, like, the main dude and, like, you can tell your guys, like, yo, yeah, like, bro. Like, yeah, we're pretty sexually active. You know how, like, cool we look. And it's those little things that we're just, like, tight. I love her so much, you know, and that makes me be like, dang, she really is like. And I'm not saying, like, just it's. It can be more. It can be, like, more than just that. I'm not saying, like, you know, like, back in the day, women used to do everything for. I'm not. I don't want my. My wife to do everything for me. Right. I'm not my cheese out whatsoever. But when I know that sex is good, my wife, out of nowhere, like, makes me my breakfast or. Or makes me these little favors that I don't ask her to do, and I know that she does. And. And when I'm with my guy friends and most of my guy friends have a great relationship, or it can even be acquaintances or even they're talking about, like, other girls that they don't even know. Right? But I'm. But for me, I'm like, wow, I really have it pretty good at home. And it's those little things that my wife would do that I'm just like, wow.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Like, she's fucking cool, you know, so.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. But it's about, like, taking what works for you and then being able to like, potentially help somebody else out. Right. Because there's a reason why it works for you because it doesn't just happen naturally.
Josh Laver
100. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's also the guy's like, job to do our part as well, you know, for sure. Like, not, not because, like, we have like the whole method now. That doesn't mean that it's all we're. Oh, we're good now. I don't gotta do. I'll be playing Call of Duty all day and. Hey, baby, you got 15 minutes?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know, it doesn't work that way. We also have to put in the word. Right. Because, you know, a lot of guys just, just a lot of guys want sex without, you know, making the, the, the female feel like we should.
Casina
Totally. I can add on to that.
Josh Laver
Okay.
Casina
When you think about, like, pornography in the marriage, like, I'm not, you know, people can do whatever they please. It's like there's no black and white answer for everyone, everyone's marriages. But what we have seen to be very true is that men, because they can, they can access pornography and get like that fix, they may not really try that hard with their wives.
Josh Laver
Wow. Because it's like, especially nowadays, right?
Casina
It's like, yeah, it's, it's so easy. And it's like, so if you, you access that and my husband can talk a little bit about this. And then after you're like, all right, I'm just going to, like, watch TV and go to bed.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
Because you don't try, you got, you got, you got something fulfilling for yourself. And then the other thing is the, the unrealistic expectations it can set. So, like, you can be comparing your wife to what you're watching. These people are putting on a show.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
And so in a way, it's like your wife can feel insecure because she doesn't even know why. Like, I've had, you know, a kind of experience where it's like, I didn't know why I was feeling insecure, but maybe it was because there was like, you're just not there. You know, like, it's like, if you're watching a show, someone's putting on a show, maybe you are being compared to that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And subconsciously, I think, regardless, I think naturally it just happens.
Casina
For sure. Yeah, for sure. And so I think that can't, that doesn't help. You know, like it could be a thing where people. Yeah, like I, I again, I don't, I'm not saying black or white. It's great or it's not great. It's just what I have seen that it is really easy to try less if that lives within your marriage. Because it's like, well, why would you, you know, why would you put in the extra effort if you can just open your phone?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Wow.
Josh Laver
You know, that's so true. And for people who come at you with these problems, what are some of the first steps that you might tell
Casina
them to do as far as like pornography or.
Josh Laver
Yeah, or like having it so accessible? Because you're right. Like guys are just like, they get their fix and that's it. And obviously when they get their fix, you get tired.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
And that's it. Right. So it's like what are some couple steps? A couple of steps to help people like that?
Casina
Yeah, I think that's a good question for my husband. As far as like you can put boundaries in place and you just have to decide like.
Josh Laver
But it's more like of the guy thing. Right.
Casina
For sure.
Josh Laver
Cuz the guy has to put those bound boundaries and the guy has to
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
understand those, the, the effects of what that's happening.
Josh Laver
Right.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Like what's happening when they're watching porn.
Casina
For sure. You get that quick fix and then the long term plan fails because you're constantly getting fed somewhere else, you know. And so like. Yeah, I think when they, when they hear it in that light, like it's something that we have talked about in our course. Like when you hear it in that light, it's like very much. Oh, it's like an aha moment. It's like, I'm not saying that what you're doing is bad. I'm just saying you're, you're getting the wrong appetite and then by default you don't even know you're giving your marriage to sloppy seconds.
Josh Laver
Damn. That's so freaking. Yeah. And you know what's crazy is so many guys back at home watching, you know, those crazy videos and pornography and they're complaining that they don't have that much sex with their wife.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
And so it's kind of like doesn't make sense.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
I know, but like of course you're not, bro. Because you're spending all your time watching porn.
Josh Laver
Yeah. And you rather just like instead of convincing your wife to like, hey, or girlfriend or whatever. Boyfriend to have sex. Instead of trying to, like, make that connection, you're like, I don't really want
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
to do all that.
Casina
Right.
Josh Laver
I can just do this right.
Casina
For sure.
Josh Laver
Damn, that's crazy. Wow.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Very interesting. By the way, if you see me looking at my phone, I'm not.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
He's texting.
Casina
I'm not texting.
Josh Laver
Jessica has, like, we have a whole thing on you, so trust me. I feel like I need to get like, a. Like, an iPad or something. Right.
Casina
Look more official.
Josh Laver
Yeah, look more official. It says here. So for people back at home, what are some healthy ways and unhealthy ways to talk about wanting more sex with your partner in general?
Casina
Yeah. I think it's just starting the conversation and knowing that, like, there's no perfect way of doing entry point. Entry point. Like, I have had clients that maybe are, like, they put off that conversation for far too long, and then they realize, like, there was never an easy way to just. Just have it.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
And you might have it 10 times over the next couple months. Because, one, you might get to this. There's like, different layers of, like, hey, first off, we're not having sex. Let's address that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
And then, well, why is that? And then the next layer I feel like, is like, well, what do you like in the bedroom? Because then you have to discover. It's like, well, okay, now we're figuring out, like, what is. Why are we missing each other? Like, what is this? Why am I not excited about it? Like, you know, what do I want? And so it's like, there's just different layers and. But I think just starting that conversation and being willing to get messy and, like, there needs. Like, I have. Sometimes people ask me, what's your framework? Or, like, specifics? And I was like, dude, like, too much. Like, just start being human and talking. Like, just talk things and don't. Don't, like, walk away because you're both mad. You know, it's like, okay, yeah, you're both pissed, and it's not going well, and you're feeling raw and vulnerable. Like, that's not the time to just be like, we're done, and we're not going to talk about it anymore, because that's where it stops. And people fall off. Like, but my husband's done so well. Like, he will look at me, and he knows I'm being super emotional and immature, and he's like, okay, like, all your emotions are, like, up here. Like. Like, I'm not gonna walk away until we actually get something like, actionable and, like, actually get something, like a solution out of all this.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
Like, what are we gonna do now?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
And so although we're not perfect at fighting and we still have fights, but it's like, we just have gotten better at, like, not leaving all of it out there and unresolved.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Wow.
Casina
And so I think with the sex talks, it's like. It's like, with anything, you just have to, like, keep trying and, like, asking questions, you know?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. I love that. I think you worded that. So I love that because I feel like people did chew. They chew, Try. They do try to figure out what is the opening sentence. Like, the frame. Like, you just said the framework, and that's crazy. And just removing the pressure of, like, just start the conversation. How it starts doesn't matter. It's how it gets resolved is the most important thing. So just getting into it, like, you don't need to know what's on your heart. What are you feeling? What do you want to say? Start with that.
Casina
Exactly.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
So that's really cool.
Casina
And then do it again.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And then. Yeah, and keep doing it and keep doing it.
Casina
Because you should be able to talk about it all the time. Like, if it's so important in your marriage. Like, and people go, oh, there you go talking about sex again. Like, that can be a common thing. Like, for me, I was like, oh, my God. He's like, like, here we go. Here we go. Because, like, I don't know where that. It's like this society and, like, this. Like, this. Okay. Like, we're talking about that thing. And it's like. But that is so important if, you know, especially. It's just like anything else. Like, if you want, as a wife to feel loved and desired and you're what, your husband to step up in all these areas, like, it's just as important for you to also acknowledge that as well. But I think it's just. Yeah. Being willing to. To just go there again and again and again and still like.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
There's a. There's a video that also I saw, and it went super viral for you. It says here, I turned my wife. I turned my wife into my porno.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
What is that?
Casina
Porn star.
Josh Laver
Porn star.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
What does that mean? Because. And. And I want you to explain it, because I. I kind of get what you're saying, but I feel like you always say, like, there's a lot of controversy with me. People don't like me. And it's probably because of things like this. Right?
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
But, like, What?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
What did she say that I was saying?
Casina
Guys like me?
Josh Laver
Yeah, yeah, guys, Lovers. No, and I know why, but, you know, it's. You're just trying to help people out. But what does that mean? Like, what?
Casina
Well, you have about three seconds to stop the scroll. So, like, if you're gonna say something, better be potent and fun.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
And I get really bored really easily.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
So, like, it's like, let's have fun, content. But really, it's essentially like, if you, if we don't believe that porn is the best thing for your marriage, then make your wife her porn star. Like, make her the fun one. Like, you know, have her, you know, be all crazy and fun and, like, with you in the bedroom. And, like, let's just, like, have that fulfillment only be by your wife. Like, turn your wife into your pleasure.
Josh Laver
Like your, Your fantasy.
Casina
Yeah, Whatever you want. Exactly, exactly. So that's, that's the context behind it. But, yeah, that's. I get what you're saying.
Josh Laver
Yeah. No, these are great hooks. These are great things to put for the screen caption. But do you feel that maybe. Because, you know, we talk about fantasies, and I think, I think having fantasies with your. With your partner can be healthy, maybe to a degree. You know, guys always talk about, like, especially, like, when you just meet a girl, they'll always be like, would you have a threesome with her? Or something like that.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know, and like, that's probably every guy's fantasy. Right. But, like, I've told my guy friends, I was like, I would never want that with my wife because I, I, I don't look at her like that. You know, I look at her more like, in a. I just wouldn't want that image in my head with her. Right. So there are degrees to this, correct?
Casina
What are you asking?
Josh Laver
Like, degrees to, like, the fantasies and, like, maybe, or, I mean, boundaries. Yeah. But I guess, yeah, there's boundaries, but I guess those all depends on just the individuals. Right. Some relationships, the boundaries are unlimited, and some have some sort of boundaries, depending on, I guess, how you.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Know your partner. Right.
Casina
For sure. People ask and like, hey, is this okay? Or like, hey, I. I think you should do whatever you want and, like, feels like, good for you. I think that is just a conversation between you and your spouse.
Josh Laver
Got it.
Casina
And also, some of those fantasies might shift some. Like, I feel like a lot of husbands genuinely just want, like, their what? Like, they want to start with the fact that their wife is, like, excited to have sex with them.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
Like, you know, it's like, that's.
Josh Laver
That's it.
Casina
That's. That's like a number one goal. Like a fantasy from there is like, that's next level. It's like, maybe not this lifetime in their mind, but. But, like, really, I feel like they're just. They're simple. The simple desire is just like, I just want to be like, you know, to just ravish each other and just be totally, like, into this. And so I feel like. And people will reach out. I just think it's whatever makes them happy and whatever they feel is a fit. But that's something I always, like, laugh because people are like, hey, like, are you going to help us with, like, positions? Oh, no, no. Like, I don't do that. I don't help with technicalities or, like, you know, really, like, that's so. Anything about the act bedroom. It's like, just all the mindset of, like, why are you consistently not having sex? And what is. What is the block from, like, you guys, like, where are you missing each other? Because I feel like they can figure out the rest. It's a. It's really kind of like a scavenger hunt after that. Okay. Let's figure out what we like, what we want that they can figure out once they have the communication tools. But before all that starts with, like, the mindset of, like, why are we not in the bedroom?
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
But your coaching is outside of just sex, too, right. Because you're saying you're a marriage coach, so you're talking on, like, other things. But are people really just coming to you because they're.
Casina
That's kind of like the niche in the sense. The problem that I solve online. If you think about, like, there's one problem that you solve.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
That would be, like. Because it's. I feel like we talk about this all the time. It's like everything in marriage is about communication.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
But, like, if most people that are not thriving in marriage or not having sex.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
So kind of is everybody's problem.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
If it. There is a rare time where, yeah, we have sex. But even, like, I'll see the husband. It's like they're having sex, but the husband's like, it's super rushed and it's like, she can't wait to get it over with or, like, we'll do it. And it's like, it's mediocre. Like, if you think about. If sex is like, the number one way that a guy feels loved and desired and it's mediocre. Like. Like, that's that's kind of crazy. Like, the whole, like, for five years, you can. We. We can go be a mediocre marriage just because, like, the sex life is mediocre. You know, it's like, if it's one of the top things for how a guy feels, loved to be giving it like a two or three or four as a wife is kind of like, man, like, how is your marriage? And you. Most guys that we. I've asked and like, that are commenting on our reels are like, there's. It's so far away from them. Like, it's not. It's not even. Like, maybe it's one blow job a year. Maybe it's one. You know, maybe it's sex once a year. It's. It's a lot. There's a lot of that. It's become very normalized, and I think people don't know how. Where to go. Like, a lot of times I'll cop on a call, like an intro call discovery, and they're like, I've never told anybody what I'm telling. I get that. Like, you know, it's like, who do you talk to? And a lot of, you know, help that is out there to me can be a little bit, like, stale or textbook, you know, and you don't know how to really, like, you know, it doesn't feel as comfortable. And it's like, well, is that person that's helping you even. Do they even have a great marriage or sex life? You know? Like, yeah, you know, and so. So we've just found that, like, it's. I don't remember what I was talking about.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Well, you're just talking about how that sex is number one for guys, Right. For them to feel the most love. But I was also curious, like, what is that for women?
Casina
Gosh. I think it's different because we all have different love languages. We want to feel safe and insecure.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
And we want to feel like when we. I can emotionally come to my husband and be, like, super weak and that he is going to be my safe place.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Your protector.
Casina
My protector. And, like, he is. What he's done so well is that he doesn't respond and react in a way that makes me shut down and pull away. And so if I'm feeling, like, super insecure about something or super, like, stressed, like, and he. He always takes my emotions and, like, brings them to, like, a higher, like, frequency. If you say that, like, it's like, if I'm feeling stressed about finances, he's. He doesn't go, oh, My God, you're right. This. But a lot of husbands do that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
And then they're like, why am I not getting laid? And you're like, well, you just, like, you just took your wife and drowned her because she was stressing. And now you just, as the leader, you did not raise her up.
Josh Laver
And so what.
Casina
He does so well. For me, what I need as a wife is, like, somebody that's good, emotionally stable.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
And that helps me truly, like, rise above. And so if I'm stressed, he's going. He's telling me the 10 things that are going. Right. And where we're going in the future. You know, he's truly helping me. Like, and then I'm going, oh, like, thank you. Like, I need you because you help me be better.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Casina
And so I feel safe, I feel secure. I know that I'm going to get a consistent person.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
Because he's consistent. Emotionally consistent. I say a lot of husbands that kind of have. Maybe they struggle with sharing their true feelings, their people, pleasing. And a wife doesn't know what to do with that because they're not actually standing up for themselves. And they're, you know, there. There's not a lot of boundaries. And so they're. In their eyes, they're walking all over their husband and they're. It's like when we went from a dynamic where I was kind of, like, a really more controlling person and, like, very, like, more masculine, I would say, yeah. And I had to switch that dynamic because I had to let him rise up and actually be the man versus me, try to, like, be one up, one on one with him all the time. And, like, he describes it so well. He says, like, when you say things in a certain way, in a certain tone, or when you. When you respond a certain way, it's like you. If you. If you take, like, a box, and that's my masculinity, it's like you're almost. You put it on the. On the counter and you're crushing it with a hammer. Like, when you disrespect me, like, when I'm trying to lead or I'm trying to give you input, I'm doing things. It's almost like you're just crushing the effort that I'm putting out there. And so I feel like what I needed from him was to be, like, the leader of our family.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And I say this, like, I respectfully, but, like, that also takes, like, the partner to be submissive.
Josh Laver
Right.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And you've kind of talked about that. Like, you have to, like, learn how to, like, do that for sure.
Josh Laver
Right.
Casina
And that's not popular, right?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
It's not. Because I even hate saying that word. I feel like that word just has such a bad connotation. Connotation to it. But it's like, that is the thing you have to do. Right? That is what's gonna help.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
Relationship, for sure.
Josh Laver
A lot of people go through this, and I've been through it as well. And I would. And I'm the type of person, like, if you've met my wife, like, we're best friends as well. And I've talked to her about this before. I'm like, look, I love you so much that. And she's very boss. She's very, like, same thing with you. Like, what turns her on is. Is business. And. And if she's very type A. Right. And she's been like that since I've met her. So she's taught me because she's. I tell her all the time, like, you molded me to let you run kind of the show lead because that's what makes you happy. And if I. And if I cross your path, you might not like it that much. Right. So when there are situations where she maybe expects me to lead the way, which I would love to. And I do.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
But before, because we have this conversations. We've had this convo before, and I'm like, well, sometimes I don't. Because you've molded me already. That it's kind of. I want things to go your way because that's what makes you happy.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
But now when there's occasions where it's like, I want to lead the way, it used to be difficult for me because I just want to be happy. I just want you to be happy and the way that you want it. Right? Right. But then there's. There's a. There's times where I'm like, dude, I want to feel like the fucking man. Planning. And it's just little things, you know, but, like, planning things out or. Or taking initiative. I would. I would have to say, like, hey, don't worry about it. I'm gonna take over. And. But you. You gotta, like, back up. You gotta let me. You gotta let me. And I think a lot of people go through that as well, because I've spoken with guys, and that's cool because, like, the. The wife or the partner, she's strong woman. And I. With that.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
But there are times when strong women need to be, like, chill.
Casina
Right?
Josh Laver
Like, let me. Let me be strong too, because that's totally. That's. That's my nature for sure. And also, it can also be a thing where it can always be like that and I don't say anything, and that eats. That'll eat you up for sure. Not being able to. To be that man. You know what I mean? So, like I said, it's really cool that it's just such a good thing to do to talk about.
Casina
Right. Yeah. It's honestly made me cringe for a long time. Like, submit. Submit to your. Oh. Like, I'm never gonna be that woman.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
And, God, that was terrible for our marriage. I just really think I look at it as just being selfless because he needs opportunity to fail. Like, I literally, like, this is a laugh because, like, I'll see him doing something wrong, and I'm like, I'm just not gonna say anything because he would rather make the mistake and be like, oh, I did this wrong.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Okay.
Casina
And then do it right.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Casina
Versus me being like, oh, no, no.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
Not that. Nope. Not. It's like, because he feels like I'm hovering and managing, and it feels better for him to figure it out sometimes. And so we've had conversations and, like, hey, do you feel disrespected in that moment? And he's like, yep.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
I'm like, okay. Like, I'll shut my mouth.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Casina
You know, and so we. Through different marriage resources and books, I've just learned that, like, how, like, it's so funny because he always wants to. Like, he won't. Like, he just wants to figure it out and do it his way and. And he'll even want to, like, I can't tell him the answer half the time because he'll be like, let me guess. Let me do this myself. You know what? Go for it. If this is what. How you're built and this excites you so. It will. Sometimes things do take longer, and sometimes things don't go the right way. But you know what? They're not. I think that sometimes things are better when we're not always in control.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
You know, and then you learn and you kind of step back and you go, you know what? Like, that was meant to go that way. I just. I feel like the team. The collaborative piece is so much stronger.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
When you can not always be running the show. And I, like, I thrive. I love that stuff. But I also, like, this little part of me inside me was like, well, why isn't he doing more? Like, I want. I want him to, you know, feeling like, to Be more. It's like, well, are you really giving your man space to mess up? And, like, are you the one building him up?
Josh Laver
Yeah. When he messes up, you know, also not allowing your. Your man to kind of run the show and not being. I don't like to say submissive, but, like, you know what I mean? Right. Like, not. Not allowing him to lead. You know how, like, people get really, like, what I find kind of what happens is when he now goes out with his boys or just by himself, you know how probably happy he is because he's not stressed out about needing to, like, make his partner happy or things like that. He's probably just, like, figuring out on his own, knowing that there's no, like, accountability for sure.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Right.
Josh Laver
And, like, as a man, that feels good.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
As a man, like, just doing your own thing and not having anybody to, like, kind of. What's the word I'm looking for? Kind of like needing to. To reply to.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know, for sure. And it can. It's damaging because now when he is around you now, it's. Now he's just on his tippy toes.
Casina
Exactly.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Right.
Josh Laver
And that's bad. You want him to, like, I want to be with you because when I'm with you, man, I'm having a great. A great, great time.
Casina
Yeah, exactly. Well, then you think about your kids. Like, that's really just, like, basic leadership principles, you know, it's like when you help people rise up, like, with my kids, I want them to feel that same way. Like, I trust them, I love them. They're gonna make mistakes, you know, and so it's really. I feel like the same principles apply in every relationship that you have around you. It's like you're constantly giving people, extending trust. Obviously, you don't extend trust the same time over and over, and people are not, you know, at all responding and taking responsibility. But with your kids and your husband, it's like, you're just constantly, like, giving, like, hey, hey, you know, this is your opportunity, and, like, this is your chance to do A, B, and C. And so for me, I just feel like if you. I've had to learn to go, like, to just zip my mouth and, like, let him flourish. And I don't even look at it as submitting anymore. Like, I feel like that's the way it started, but it was not. It was more so, like, let me just let him breathe. Like. Like, let him do his thing and be a man. And, like, everyone wants this man that's already perfect, but, like, that's how the men that man become. Become. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And so it's like I just have to keep reminding myself of like, keeping the end in mind of like, okay, if this is the goal that I want, this is where we start.
Josh Laver
Yeah. And like at the same time, like, I don't know if he was in a past relationship or anything, but I'm assuming this is like the longest you've ever been with somebody, right? So it's his first time like living his life with a woman, you know, so it's like everything is a learning experience. Dude, when I first moved in with my wife. Learning experience, right? And so, and, and for her as well, you know, I'm very submissive too because I just, I feel like my love language is like letting you do whatever you want, you know, like whether it be decor, whether it be anything, you know, it's like, yeah, whatever you want. Right? But sometimes I feel like that can like fuck me, right? But yeah, I find it, being with somebody for the first time, living with them, it's a challenge. And you know, it's like those reels or those tiktoks they see, like, have you ever seen your man and just see that little kid he once was? You know, like, why is my man that little bad kid? You know, that's what we are. We're still like fucking kids trying to figure it out, even though we're in our 30s, but you know what I mean, we're still trying to figure it out, you know, and like, for someone like me, I don't have older brothers. I'm the oldest of five. So like I'm still figuring it out, you know, until this day for sure.
Casina
And you're not going to tell, hopefully you don't tell your kids like all the things that they're only doing wrong, of course, you know, and so it's like, try to like continuously like remind yourself, okay, if I wouldn't tell my son that he did bad job cleaning his room, maybe I shouldn't tell my husband that he did it. You know, it's like, got it. Just constantly that reminder of like, well, why would I treat my husband. Husband this way when I wouldn't treat my boss that way, you know?
Josh Laver
And just like how you said in the beginning of, of the podcast, it's just being good at what you want to accomplish. You have to keep reminding yourself these things, right? Cuz it's easy to come up with the idea and be like, oh yeah, that would work. And then you just never think about it. Again, it just goes through the door. But it's like, to be really like, dude, I'm so forgetful. I'll, like, write things down or I'll. I'll write down and I'll screenshot it and put it on my wallpaper, on my phone because, like, I need to remember these things for sure. So those little things, like reminding yourself not to talk to them a certain way, just like how you wouldn't talk to your kids that way. You know what I mean? Those are super important things because it's easier said than done, for sure. And having that consistency to remind yourself. And then you'll just always be reminded.
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know, it's just like. Yeah, yeah. So that's really good advice. Just is. Because that's the hard part. We can talk about it, but it's just like, how consistent are you going to be with it?
Casina
Well, it's like even like practicing if you're growing in your faith or certain you're just. It's like, like, yeah. You're consistently reading similar material, but you have to remind yourself constantly to be a giver to love people, and that never ends.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Like, that's like a constant thing that you do forever, right?
Casina
Exactly. Yeah. And so it's like, if you're like, it. It's just constant reminders. And, you know, getting information to receive it a new way can be helpful. But I feel like it's like the same. It's like you're just always growing and constantly receiving, like. And telling yourself the same things.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. And you get better at it.
Josh Laver
Right?
Casina
For sure.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Like, they'll just. They'll say one little thing like, got it. You know? And you just know from there on out. Yeah.
Josh Laver
Cool. Well, we're gonna go on break real quick.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yes.
Josh Laver
Little. Little break, little commercial break. And then we're gonna bring your mans in, the star. We're gonna grill them. Star of the show.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
So we'll take a little break, and
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
then we'll be right back.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Right back.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Let's do it.
Josh Laver
Awesome, guys. Taste.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
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Josh Laver
Salud, guys. I already know you've been dreaming about this day before Hata together. Come on, baby. Well, now it's@costco.com. you got to grab it.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yes. This is the best deal you're going to get. If you want to buy salud@costco.com. i've said this before. Our goal is to get into the warehouses, like a store location. So if we perform well, if you guys show up and you guys purchase the variety pack@costco.com we have a chance to be the first Latino hydration brand in Costco.
Josh Laver
Come on, baby. Guys, we can do it. It's easy. Imagine going to Costco and you're seeing salute, ping, pink, pink. Pick it up.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And so the way to do it, you got to go to Costco.com. guys. I know a lot of you guys been DMing me saying that you guys don't see it in stores. We're not in stores yet. Costco.com you get this variety pack. It's the only place you can get it, and it's the only place you get the incredible deal for this beautiful bundle.
Josh Laver
It's beautiful. It's like a collector's item.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Might be.
Josh Laver
Might be. Might be. Costco.com. all right, and we're back from our little commercial break. Those are kind of rare nowadays, huh?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
I guess.
Josh Laver
Yeah. So, Taylor, when she started putting videos out like this, what was your first initial thought? Did she tell you?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Oh, yeah. This is a joint effort, for sure.
Josh Laver
Oh, cool.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah, I actually. I think I kind of put out one of the first videos.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah, it was. We were just transitioning into social, and I had, like, zero followers and posted something that I think she mentioned at the 72 hour rule.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I think it maybe had like 300 followers, and it was like 1.8 million. Whoa. Views. And I was like, that must be not. I don't think that's real.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
And then there was. And then. Yeah, then we just kind of grabbed onto that.
Casina
And you kept posting it every time it went viral.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
There'd be, like, 500 comments. And we knew that that was a big pain point for men. And it would. The comments would be like, I think you mistyped 72 days. Or like, they'd send the emoji of, like, the. The old lady where she's like, I've waited 70 days.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. I'm like the Titanic.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
And so we're like, wow. Like, this is way more prevalent than we thought.
Josh Laver
Wow.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Like, we should. We should help some people here.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
So that whole idea was not. You have having sex within 72 hours. Right. And not letting you go past that. Gotcha. And really just reinforcing that.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. And I think that. And some people will say, like, oh, it puts unwanted pressure on couples.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Sure. That was gonna be my Question for sure.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
And I think it can if, like. Yeah. If you're not putting forth effort. Kind of what you mentioned before about, like. I think the man's got to, like, put forth effort and, like, want to, like, try to, you know, woo your wife into bed, so to speak. Because if, like. Because if, like, you're not and you're kind of treating it like. Like you mentioned, like, oh, it's been 72 hours. All right, babe, I'm playing Call of Duty. Like, it's time to.
Josh Laver
Yeah, yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Answer the call, you know?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Then the wife's gonna go, like, well, great. Like, now it's been 72 hours versus, like, it put. It almost like, put things like top of mind awareness where I'm like, okay, it's been 72 hours. Okay. Now I believe that sex starts in the morning. Or now I gotta start doing some things to, like, show, like, hey, I love what. She'll call me out. Exactly. But, like, you know, I gotta start doing things to, like, show that I care and that I wanna put forth effort.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, I guess, like foreplay, right? Like, it starts before, like. Yeah. Like the little things that just kind of help you guys get into the mood of it all.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yep. For sure. It's different for everybody.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, for sure. And I like that because it's not supposed to be like a checklist. Right. 72 hours, we gotta have sex. But sometimes you need those kind of reinforcements to, like, get you thinking like that.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And I think that's what it's more about.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. Right.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Not about, like, hitting it right at the 72 hours or within that. It's like, to start working your brain.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. And people got so literal in some of the comments. They're like, yeah, well, what if, like, she's on her period? I'm like, bro, bro, wait, put down the.
Casina
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Like, there's.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Seriously.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, Yeah.
Josh Laver
I don't even think those kind of comments are even worth replying to. I don't.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah, I just, like, see it.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
But it's crazy that people think like that, right? Like. Like just so literal about everything.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
And, like, it was kind of a joke and then it just, like, kind of went off.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's so funny.
Josh Laver
I know. Like, just, like, more personally, but, like, I know, like, this is a serious topic, what we talk about. Right. But it. You guys are also on social media, right? Do you guys have, like, oh, we should do this kind of video, or, like, any. You guys brainstorm ideas for your social media, like, oh, this is something that has. Has happened to us or maybe to somebody. We should talk about it. You guys plan those videos out?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I mean, we. We talk about just, like, we really just want to focus on, like, what are the pain points from both points of view, husband or wife. Yeah. And then we just brainstorm ideas, like, how do we communicate that, where it's going to resonate and it's going to land.
Josh Laver
Yeah. As, as a man, what are some things that have helped you out that have created a more successful way to have sex?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I think it all started just with me being able to have that conversation. Like, me being vulnerable. Like, that was kind of like the start of it was like, if. I don't know if that answers your question right, but like, if.
Josh Laver
Like, yeah, like, kind of like. Well, yeah, obviously, like, that was like the most important thing, but now, now living through it. What are some things that is making her feel comfortable? Got it with now. It's like, like, it's like a. Like a thing now. Like, yeah, let's do it. You know what I mean?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
The dishes.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Doing it well.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I'm not joking.
Josh Laver
Yeah. Like, literally. Literally, things like that, you know, depending on what her love language is, what yours is.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Right. No, I think it's. It's just consistency. And I think when it comes to leadership, she looks to me for leadership. And I don't mean, like, leadership. Like, I'm like, head of the ship. This is what we're doing business. It's almost like I need to set the tone emotionally for the household. Like, I need to set. I need to lead emotionally. So when she's up here, like, she mentioned, like, I'm here and I can kind of be that. That equalizer.
Josh Laver
Yeah, that was so much. Like, that was some of the best advice that I've, honestly, I've ever heard somebody say, because it's true, guys. And I'll look at the camera because, guys, I'm looking at you guys watching. We tend to forget that the house is for women. It's like a Dojo 100. Like, we might look at it like, yeah, like, this is our house, our crib. But like, for women, this is their comfortability, and this is like, this is where they live.
Casina
Live.
Josh Laver
Right. So we forget that we should step into that house, into anything, any situation, wanting to make our girl feel also like the queen. You know what I mean? Make her feel comfortable. If there are things going on in their life or in the house, it's our job to make them feel like, yo, life is Good. You're okay. The house is going to be good. I'm good with you. And we tend to forget. We tend to forget on a daily basis. Like, we just kind of brush everything out and we expect everything to be okay. But at the end of the day, like, I personally feel like women are much more emotional than men.
Casina
For sure.
Josh Laver
So that being said, it's our job to kind of get there as well.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
And to remind ourselves daily to do these little things. Right. Because we can go on through our days and not doing anything and forget so quick. Yeah. And you forget so quick. You know, And I feel like, you know, you also live with your partner, and it's those little things that count when you're living with somebody. But the. The reward, like having sex or being happy or falling, bro, the worst thing is, like, when you and your girl are mad and, like, attention. Yeah. And then you guys fall asleep mad. It's just the worst feeling, isn't it? And the next day you wake up, you're like, hey, hey. You know, and like, guys were so, like. Like, even if I get mad and, like, I'll fall asleep mad, the next day, I'm like, yo, I'm not doing this. You know, like, everything's cool. But for a woman, it's kind of like, no, we're still mad. Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know, like, God damn, that was a yesterday.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
That was like six hours.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
So then I look at my man. Why is she mad? Why she did. Why she. That. And I'm like, well, maybe I didn't make her feel comfortable. Yeah, I. I felt that something. Right. And, you know, when she was talking about this, I was like, wow, that's such good advice. Just, like, making her feel. It's a little thing. It's not even financially anymore. It's just, like, making me feel like life is good.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I think we got to stay consistent with that. It's like, if I, like, my attitude's got to be on point. And sometimes it's not. In the morning, of course. You know, I got two kids, and sometimes they don't want to sleep. And I wake up and I'm a little bit grumpy, but the more I let that fester, and if I stay grumpy and if I get. I'm like, oh, great, the dishes aren't done. Oh, this is. It's like, now I can notice that I'm planting little seeds of negativity in her. And that 3 o' clock rolls around 3pm and then she gets mad at Me. And I'm like, bro, what did I do?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, like, well.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah, well, you were a dick in the morning. I'm like, what? Like, that was like six hours. Like, what?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, but if I'm.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
But if you're positive in the morning, you're like, hey, babe. Oh, it's a great night. Even if it's a bad night, just say it was a good night.
Josh Laver
Yeah, got it.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
You know, and then just stay continuously positive. It's hard to do. You gotta remind ourselves. Yeah, but it just works out so much better for you later in the day.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Are you a coach as well? Yeah. Oh, okay, cool. How long have you. Do you guys. You guys do, like, individual coaching, joint coaching? How does that work?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
It depends On. On the client, on who they want to go with.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Wow.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Throw it out there. You want to coach with my husband?
Casina
He has more clients than I do. I fight a lot of. Like, I take the prospect calls through my Instagram. Like, I kind of do the intro call. And we're building up his Instagram right now. We just started it, but essentially, like, a lot of husbands want to coach with the husband.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, that makes sense.
Casina
They're, like, comfortable, you know, for sure. And so once he left his job, he was able to. To give a lot, put a lot more time back in his calendar, and kind of, like, fill up his time with clients now. So it's been really awesome.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. Do you guys feel like, when you coaching, that you also, like, learn so much about, like, your own relationship and, like, I don't know if that makes sense. You get what I'm saying? I'll be coaching somebody. You're like, damn, this is good for me.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I'm like, I hope she's not right outside that door. I don't do that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I could see that. Right?
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I'll tell them. I'm like, boom. And there's a nugget. And I'm like, damn, I should do that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
We know, right? But applying it is, like, a whole different thing.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. That's interesting. Yeah. Because my. I have a sister who's a marriage counselor as well, and she just dropped some wisdom, bro. Like, I'm like, damn. But then I'll hear her talk about her relationship or whatever, and I should have put it in. But, like, I'm like, but you have all the answers. Like, why aren't you. Don't you have this? Figure it out. But it's like, sometimes you just. Yeah, it's just different, Right?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And you're going to learn is that you're always evolving.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. Sometimes you're too close to it to
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
not maybe even that's what it is as well. Yeah. And.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
But it's also. It's so. It's like marriage is like. Or just a relationship. So just like, I swear, that and parenting are the toughest things.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Because, like, you're so close with your emotional partner, and it's. It goes so deep that you're like. It's so. You can be so vulnerable with them, and it's so easy to, like, revert back to your old ways because you're so comfortable with them.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you get that experience when you guys are creating videos? Like, you guys will make a video and you'd be like, you're kind of like, now look. Introspective of your relationship.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. Do you mean, like, when we're like. Well, because.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
I guess.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. Somewhat.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. Yeah. Like, you come up with a video, you guys will post it. You guys are reading through the comments, and it's like, top of mind. And you kind of like, man, we should really. I don't know, you just reflect on it a little bit differently.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah, I think so.
Casina
Yeah. I feel like we. I don't know. When we. When it comes to the. I feel like we've had to learn on being critical of each other of, like, that teamwork aspect because it's like, like, hey, I'm asking for you to watch this before I post it, but I really am, like, don't want your feedback, you know? Well, you're like, you know, your partner is your best friend, but you're also like, your cheerleader, but you're also, like, business partners. So you're like, I want to be honest. And so we've kind of, like, navigated through the business journey together of being like, you know, helpers, but also, like, you know, like, supporter. You know, it's like a fine line between, like, I'm gonna cheer you on, but I also, like, I'm gonna help you and correct you. You a little bit.
Josh Laver
Dude. Doing social media with your partner is a whole different world.
Casina
Totally.
Josh Laver
You know, I mean, like, you. Like, I've been doing videos with my wife for a very long time, and, you know, we've had to, you know, we always joke about it. And I used to edit my wife's videos for, like, five years, and then I was like, babe, like, I quit. And it wasn't anything to do with her. It's just I didn't want to be Your work buddy anymore. Yeah. And like, it kind of hurt her. It did.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
But you know, I'm not gonna edit your videos forever, y', know, like, I want to be your husband. I want to be your boyfriend at the time, you know, I want to. I want to be talking about different things other than just social media. You know, social media can be really. Even now. Like, that's all we do, right? Social media. We have to start having conversations with like, hey, let's not talk about any of that stuff.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
I want to talk about random ass. Yeah. You know, talk to me about like, what, what kind of animal does that cloud look like? Different stuff. How some of the things being on social media, like, for people. Because that's, that's a new wave too. Like, even if you have a business of like selling cookies, you have a social media.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
And you and your husband or you and your boyfriend are doing videos, you know, that's the world we live in. What's some advice that you have for people that are on social media? Because it can be a bitch.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. I don't want to, like, oversimplify this, but I think that you just don't make it a big deal. You know, it's like for us, it's like our marriage comes first.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
So if we see ourselves like arguing or something's happening in a video, we're trying to make something like, well, you do this. Well, why don't you put the camera like this? Like, well, I want the camera over here. Well, we know. Hey, why don't you say this? I'm like, well, I want to say it the way I want to say it. Whatever it is. I think you just have to realize, like, you know, we're on the same team.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Like, how do we just like, okay, we have kind of like take a step back and go and breathe and go.
Josh Laver
Okay.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
How do we. How do we work together?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. And. And it's not that serious.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
It's not.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Like we're literally making a video about
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
with our cell phones. Yeah, yeah. It's not like a movie, but.
Josh Laver
But like when you really care about your videos, it's kind of serious. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Oh, for sure.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
But not to the point that it needs to affect the relationship, you know, Never.
Josh Laver
And that should be the advice.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
At the end of the day, there's no reason why we should be mad at each other.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, Yeah.
Josh Laver
I remember my wife would give me videos to edit at like one in the morning. It's due tomorrow. What?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Oh, like, it's one. It is tomorrow.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Yeah. But you know what? She's a hard worker, so that's awesome. It was things that needed to be done.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Yeah. But navigating through that is crazy.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
It is.
Josh Laver
What's some advice that you think had the most impact on your relationship? For the better?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
That's a good question. Let me think about that. I think for me, it was like, I had to treat her. It's like I had to. I guess it was a couple things. One, it was like what I mentioned earlier about leading the house emotionally, setting the tone. That's changed everything. Just, like, just be a good vibe in the house. Look to her. I want her to look to me as, like, the stabilizer. But then the other one was like, treat my wife as if she has a handle with care stamp on her forehead. Like, she's gentle. Like, she might. She's very strong, for sure.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I used to call her the bull,
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
but what a nickname, you know? No, not. Not to her face.
Josh Laver
I'm just kidding. I'm kidding.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
But, no, just. Just. She's still gentle. She's still my wife. She's still my prince. Princess, not prince.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You guys fantasies are different, huh?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
You know, that's the other podcast I'm doing. No. You know, she's still my princess, my queen, and so I want to, like, I want to treat her.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
As such.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I always have to remember, like, remember that. And it's like, I can. Like, why I had to keep remembering, like, why can I yell at my co workers? Why can I yell at my boys? Why can I yell my friends? Or why can't I yell at them? But why can't I yell at her?
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Why do you feel so comfortable? Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Like, you scream at her, but, like, I would never scream at my boss.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
You know, I'm like, oh, check myself.
Josh Laver
Yeah. And your wife is the most important 100, and the 1 that always has your back.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Yeah. Also feeling just always. I. I like. To me, personally, I like to feel like I'm always thought about. Right. Like, little things. Like, she never does this, but what. Sometimes, like, I think she was, like, a little irritated with me and she ordered postmates just for her.
Casina
Dang.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh, didn't ask you if you wanted.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Oh, I'm sorry. Did you want something?
Josh Laver
Yeah, I just saw one bowl of whatever she had, and I was like, dang, I'm joking. But little things like that, you know, just always wanting to feel. Wanted to. Right. And, like, as a man, you got to do the same.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yep. Yeah, 100.
Josh Laver
So there was a couple questions here. It's crazy. This is why I wanted you on the podcast because we get to talk about things like this.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Send it.
Josh Laver
So were you really only getting one blowjob a year? That's what it says.
Casina
That's on Instagram.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I wasn't a lot. It's not far off. Yeah, probably one.
Josh Laver
One and a half, huh?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
One quarter. Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
One and a smidge. Smidge and a half.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
So this is a conversation you guys had, obviously, because you were feeling a
Josh Laver
type of way, right?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah, I had that open conversation with her about vulnerability and then it led to like, well, what are you guys? Like the bedroom? And she asked me, and she like almost like begrudgingly asked me, like, if I ask this, like I got to do it. She like. Which is. What is it like more blow jobs or whatever? Actually, yeah, that would be great.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Anything more than one would be awesome.
Josh Laver
Yeah. Is this something you talk to your. Your homies to like your boys?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Like do.
Josh Laver
Do. Do you tend to give them advice as well? Cuz one thing is speaking very vulnerably with your wife. The other one is speaking very vulnerably with your boys too.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Only if they ask.
Josh Laver
Got it.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I never want to impart with, you know, not gonna say wisdom. I never want to impart any knowledge that I have or advice. I guess advice would be a better word. If they don't ask.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, that makes sense.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
But if they do, then 100.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
But sometimes they're not. I think some people aren't open enough or they're not vulnerable. Vulnerable enough to even ask. It's kind of like they're masking, like. Yeah, no, we're great.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I'm like, well, okay.
Josh Laver
All right.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
That's awesome.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
So we have this thing too where we wanted to ask both of you, like, top three things that turn you on so it doesn't have to be sexual. It can probably great. For the views. Yeah. For the click.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I don't know anything non sexual,
Josh Laver
but it can be something around the house or something that she does.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Third down conversions
Casina
you can share with your. Your love languages.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Okay. So for me, I. I'll like take that and just like add on to it a little bit. But like, I will like things that like fill my love tank in a sense for her too. So they were totally different. But for me it's like I like just like hanging out, like just that. Just quality time. Yeah, quality time.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh, wow.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Like, I like Tossing the Frisbee, whatever it is, like, tossing the football, whatever. And she'll be like, you want me to throw the football with you? And I'm such a little kid.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I do want you to throw.
Josh Laver
Will that turn you on?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh, yeah, sure.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Tarp comes off right there on. At the park.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
No, no, no.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I don't know. I don't want to. I mean, guys are pretty simple. It's pretty easy to turn a guy on.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yet I don't want to, like, over simplify it, but for me, it's not.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
It doesn't take much.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
But when she's. I think when she is present, it would be the biggest thing. Like when we're getting, like, whatever we're going into, you know, being intimate or whatever. As soon as, like, she's, like, present, like, before, she'd be checked out.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
You know, kind of like she's talking about. It's like, checklist. I'm like, well, that doesn't. It's like. I mean, I can do it, but, like, at the end of the day, like, that doesn't, like, fulfill me. That doesn't, like, turn me on. It's just kind of like I can treat it like a checklist, too, at that point.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
But when she's, like, present, then that 15 minutes turns to about three minutes.
Josh Laver
All we need. What about you, Cassia?
Casina
I would say when. With. When he's talking, he's a dreamer. When he's a big dreamer and so he's talking about dreams and goals, business stuff. Like, I'm like, oh, that's so fun. What are we gonna do? Where are we gonna go? And, like, I immediately, like, get excited. And so that is something that, like, I. I find attractive.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
I would say when he wears his hat backwards.
Josh Laver
Dang. He looks like a bad boy or what?
Casina
Maybe it's different. When we first met, we were kind of crazy. Like, just, like, totally different lifestyle. So we. Yeah, I feel like it reminds me of those days.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Oh, cool. That's funny.
Casina
And, yeah, I would say the. And I guess when he is emotionally, like, up, like, when he really helps me, it just. It's so attractive. Like, when a guy can truly, like, help you rise above and remind you, like, to be abundant and to not think so small and to just. In this little. It'll be like the same smallest moment, and he lifts it kind of just. He takes me one notch up, and for me, just such a breath of fresh air. And it makes me feel like I need him and I want him More.
Josh Laver
Yeah. I feel like women really love a guy who has those like those dreamer ambition goals.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Right.
Josh Laver
Like a woman looks at a man and they get turned on when the man wants more for their. Themselves. Maybe not even them, maybe not even the wife.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
It's. It's them.
Josh Laver
They have this, this like manly goal of like I want to be this kind of man. And I think that turns on, turns women on for sure. Like those very like those go getter guys, you know what I mean? And I feel like when you are married or when you're in a relationship for a very long time, I think a lot of guys, they tend to kind of steer away from that almost just settle. Yeah, yeah. Right. Yeah. So to be like that kind of dreamer guy or you know, things like that. Because I feel like a lot of guys when you first meet your, your partner, you are the dreamer guy. You are talking a big talk. Right. But it's like how long can you walk the walk too? Right. Especially like when you first get with, with, with a girl, you know, the guys always like spin big game, but then later on it just dies all down, you know?
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
So did I do that?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Did I do that?
Casina
What do you mean?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Let's get a big game and not
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
like start off high.
Josh Laver
Yeah, I feel like we all do, you know, but like it, it's, it's. It's our job to kind of like keep it there.
Casina
But I think I'll just add a little tiny bit. Sure. Because he, I feel like we, we. We struggled with our character a lot. So like he, it's like he would spit a big game and then we wouldn't. There wouldn't be follow through in the very beginning. But it wasn't because it was just we struggled because we never really stuck to any, anything. And then if you don't come from like a household where like commitment and follow through is like normalized or you're not held to like a higher standard. I feel like it's so easy to just let yourself down and so like in it. So I would, we would almost like go on our. We when that would happen, say he wouldn't follow through or something. Like I would step back and follow through on my end and then he would see it. It was like an example and he'd go, okay, I'm doing that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Wow.
Casina
So it was like you can't like even if you are with someone that isn't following through, if you lead the way silently and like lovingly, they have a chance to really witness what that looks like firsthand. And then they will rise up too, you know? But yeah, I just wanted to add that.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
How old were you guys when you guys started dating?
Casina
20.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
I met her in a bar when she was 20.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Dude, that and you were 23.
Josh Laver
Wow.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
We went to same high school together.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. Dude, that's like so young. Like you get just through that trajectory of like life, like so much changes immensely and everything. So just like working through just that. That's crazy.
Casina
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
And we never really think about it, but you're not that person anymore. Right. And you aren't either. So for somebody to be changing constantly throughout that relationship span, that can be really difficult because, like, that's why sometimes shit doesn't work out, because you're just not that person anymore.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And some people hold on to that.
Josh Laver
You hold on to it and you hold on to it. But it's like, what would be some sort of advice, you know, that you guys think is right for people that are going through something like that? Like, how can you, like, because people change, but like, how can you kind of hold on in like a healthy way?
Casina
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know you want to go.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
No, go ahead.
Casina
Is the question for like if one of them isn't changing or. Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
What was the question?
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Casina
So.
Josh Laver
So for people who are like in this huge, like long relationship, sure. There might be some changes and affect their relationship.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
So like, maybe what are some things that they can do to kind of like hold on to that relationship when they're kind of noticing that it's somewhat failing because there are some changes especially, or I guess, like advice for people who are in long distance or not long distance. Long time relationships.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. Well, I mean, the first thing that comes to mind is that you can't change other people and that you could. The only thing you do is leave it at all in the field and just do everything you can. And if there's issues, is what I'll tell clients is that if, like, if your spouse is not receiving things well, or if like you're trying to change and they're not changing.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Like, I, like, I don't, I don't believe in divorce, but if. And I don't preach that at all, but I do believe that not everybody should be together. Because if someone's like, if you're like pouring your heart out, dude, you're like trying and you were like being vulnerable, you'd be like, hey, this is how I feel. Like all this stuff, and they're just like, yeah, whatever.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Then it's like I think you deserve to be happy. You know, I think you should. You do deserve to find somebody that you love. But, like, my biggest advice to anybody there would be, like, why don't you just, like, share how you feel with that other person? Like, share that you want to change. Say like, hey, I want to be like, back in that, you know, when we were first dating. Like, how do we get there? Like, communicate as if you're a team. Like, like, hey, I believe that we fell in awful. Like, I believe that there's something. Something's missing. Like, you just share what you like, what's on your mind, in your heart.
Casina
You always remind me that we're a team. It's like, hey, we're a team. So, like, let's, let's, let's. Let's do this together. It's not, I'm not saying you're the problem. We. But like, let's fix this together. Like, I'll show up with you. And so I feel like that helps me, like, feel like it's not an attack. And it's like, hey, we're a team. You're like, yeah, you're right. We are a team.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
The answer is always communication.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
It is?
Casina
Yeah, literally.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Tell me like, oh, this, she's doing this, and this is how I feel. Have you said that to her? Well, no, I'm like, just start there.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Just start there.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Just say you don't.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Literally. Yeah, because we'll do these, like, segments, like, perspective of a man, and people are like, chiming in for advice. And it literally always just reverts back to, like, you got to communicate this with your partner, else how are they going to know? And I even like what you were talking about earlier, because I just. The simplicity of just like, saying what's on your heart and just going for it and just see what happens, you know? And even if you don't get that response right then and there, like, it does something to your partner, right. Like, it kind of plants the seed, and then it just allows them start thinking about what the question was or what they. How they feel. But yeah, it's interesting. It's just communication, man. That's everything. And just being able to be vulnerable, but it also takes the right partner, too.
Casina
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
And I think a lot of guys have that fear, right? Like, they don't necessarily. Maybe they don't trust themselves. They don't trust their partner. They feel like they're going to be judged like, you know, the, the nor the social norms or how they got raised, or maybe they saw Their dad never really talk about their feelings, so
Casina
for sure, it's like.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Like, I don't know. It's hard. It's like. It's like, really hard, dude. I got raised by a single mom. My mom was always venting to me about how she feels and stuff, so I just would model her.
Casina
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
I'm like, you know what?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Me too.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
But, yeah, you know, so I. I don't know. Like, how does somebody get better at that? How do you learn to be vulnerable? How do you learn to just, like, say, you know what it. I'm gonna tell them how I feel.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
You know what I mean?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah. You just.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
You just do it.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
It's like, I've never surfed. Like, I'm so scared.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
The ocean's big.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Like, how do I do it? Do you just do it?
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
You just do it.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, you know what?
Josh Laver
Like, part of it, there.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
There is a risk, right. Like, you might be vulnerable. And you.
Josh Laver
Because, look, I.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Look, I'm gonna be real here. I've heard relationships where women are harsh, right. And they're like, don't judge you towards their man. Like, I heard my man talk about he was scared of this or whatever it may be, and then that's just gonna shell the man up because you're like, I would. I just poured out my heart. Now you're judging me for how I feel, you know, like, I'm not man enough for you. Like, that's crazy.
Josh Laver
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
You know, so it's not. Not all women are like that.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Right.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
I would even venture to say that most women are. They want to hear your heart. They want to hear what's going on with you. They want to, you know, understand you in such a deeper way. So I don't know. Yeah, I think it's important to just.
Josh Laver
I mean, if they really love you, let it out. Yeah. And with you, I mean, they're hearing you out.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
You know, if they really are that partner for you, and if they're not, you know, and you're pouring out your heart and they're just whatever about it. I mean, there's your answer, right?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yeah.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
100.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Wow.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah.
Josh Laver
Well, I think we'll leave it there, guys. That was really interesting. Thank you, guys so much for being here. That was really cool.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
You guys offer coaching, right? So we'll definitely link them below. If you guys are looking for coaching, I highly recommend it. I've never taken coaching. I'm actually very intrigued now. But Yeah, I think there's a lot. And you. Do you guys still get coached yourself?
Casina
We have had many coaches through the years, but we. We're. We are always open to new opportunities.
Josh Laver
That's so cool.
Casina
So it's like not. Not currently, but. Yeah, yeah, we do love a good coach.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
I love that.
Josh Laver
Well, and then you're saying you're building up your social media as well right now. Right. So what's the handle for that?
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Just the Taylor Burn Bomb. First and last name. Okay.
Josh Laver
We'll link it.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
Yeah. As well.
Josh Laver
You can try to spell. Make it very last name. Well, I'm glad you guys are here. If I need some advice, I know who to reach out to as well. You guys are a beautiful couple, beautiful babies. Thank you so much. We enjoyed our time here with you guys.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Thanks for having us.
Josh Laver
Everybody go follow. Follow them. And, yeah, it'll definitely make your feed a lot more spicy. Very spicy. And honestly, I think that's why it's so cool, because I think people look at it as taboo. I don't think it's taboo. I think it's real fucking life.
Taylor Burn Bomb (Casina's husband)
Yes.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
There you go, man.
Josh Laver
All right, we'll see you guys next Monday.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
See you guys. Love you.
Josh Laver
Bye.
Co-host (possibly La Platica co-host)
All right, bye.
In this candid and refreshingly honest conversation, hosts Josh and Sebas welcome marriage coaches and content creators Casina (aka "Making Marriage Sexy") and her husband Taylor Birnbaum. They tackle head-on the challenges of keeping intimacy alive in long-term relationships—especially marriage. Drawing from their own journey through business, personal growth, and overcoming familial patterns of divorce, Casina and Taylor share both practical strategies and raw stories that have made them viral on social media. The hosts and guests explore masculinity, vulnerability, emotional safety, communication, and—yes—sexual intimacy as core pillars of lasting partnerships.
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“Making Marriage Sexy” isn't just about sex—it's about emotional maturity, deeply honest communication, self-examination, and mutual support. Intimacy and partnership are daily practices, not one-time fixes. Casina and Taylor’s approach is unfiltered, practical, and encouraging, offering both men and women tools to invest in their relationship’s “ROI”—with plenty of humor, realism, and heart.
Connect with Casina & Taylor:
Listen for a reality check, actionable advice, and honest talk about love, sex, and partnership in the digital age.