"Monstro SarahNicole" (w/ Sarah Sherman) (RE-RELEASE)

Summary

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Las Culturistas: "Monstro SarahNicole" (w/ Sarah Sherman) - RE-RELEASE

Podcast Hosts: Matt Rogers & Bowen Yang
Guest: Sarah Sherman
Release Date: December 31, 2025
Network: Big Money Players Network/iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

This riotous episode of Las Culturistas reunites Matt and Bowen with comedian and SNL star Sarah Sherman ("Saturday Night Live"). In a notoriously unfiltered, laughter-filled discussion, the trio navigates the weird and formative pop culture objects and moments that shaped Sarah, with detours into reality TV, Twin Peaks, childhood crushes, fragrance drama, and the latest Real Housewives insanity. Sarah, in full "Monstro" energy, brings her signature surreal wit and chaos, resulting in what Matt dubs "the laughing episode."

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Triple Reunion & Sarah's Triangular Head

• The group marks the rare occasion of all three being together, having missed crossing paths in previous episodes.
• On Sarah's Sitting Posture & Hair:
  • Sarah claims she's sitting in a specific way to hide her "triangle head," joking that her hair is a geometric structure ("isosahedron").
  • "If you guys are my friends, you'd be like, girl, you do have triangle heads at night. But that’s okay. And just rock it." – Sarah (03:32)

2. Serious Silliness: Culture, Evil, and The Traitors

• Sarah launches into ideas about "good and evil" via her obsession with the reality show The Traitors.
• They discuss how contestants blur the line between game and reality, with emotionally real reactions to being called "evil":
  • "People say to each other, this. This. You're being evil. European." – Sarah (08:25)
  • They riff on whether evil is essential or constructed, referencing Wicked:
    • "Do you believe people are born wicked or do they have wickedness thrust upon them?" – Bowen (09:52)

3. David Lynch, Twin Peaks, and The Nature of Evil

• Sarah — a hardcore Lynch fan — brings up the spiritual philosophical underpinnings in Twin Peaks:
  • "I think we do have to be taking a moment for las culturistas to say David Lynch." – Sarah (12:11)
  • She explains, in a passionate monologue, how the show suggests man-made evil entered the world with the atomic bomb, and love might not be enough to combat it:
    • "He posits that true evil was unleashed into every dimension and realm of the universe when the first atomic bomb exploded..." (50:09)
    • "My fear is that love is not enough." (51:20)
  • Encourages Matt and Bowen to finally watch Twin Peaks for the stunning women and Lynchian intrigue.

4. Reality TV Deep Dives: Housewives, The Substance, and Gay Iconography

• Heavy discussion about the latest Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, with breakdowns of cast dynamics, iconic moments, and fan-favorite stars.

• Sarah shares her all-time top 5 Housewives, focusing on the oddballs: Carlton, Ramona, Angie, Karen (Potomac), and a toss-up between Mary Cosby and Elsa (Miami).

  • "She speaks with such clarity this season that I thought that she was channeling spirit." – Sarah on Mary Cosby (61:44)

• The episode is peppered with callbacks to legendary Housewives moments and slandering of “manufactured” Housewife drama.

• Sarah reflects on being called a "gay icon," the importance of queer culture in shaping mainstream culture, and directly credits the queer community for her world view:

  • "Please. Who do you think, besides David Lynch, built culture as we know it? Gay guys." (23:16)

5. Pop Culture Nostalgia & Personal Anecdotes

• Sarah and the hosts swap stories about childhood crushes on teachers, odd teachers' fashion habits, and Long Island/kid memories.
• They riff on school memories, mall culture, and family sayings—culminating in hysterical stories about parental catchphrases and “peanut head” nicknames.

6. Physical Comedy and SNL Prosthetics

• Reflection on Sarah’s recent SNL appearances—her prosthetic, Nosferatu-inspired look described as both terrifying and “supermodel hot.”
  • "She’s supposed to look terrifying, but everyone's like, that's the most adorable person I've ever seen." – Bowen (14:10)

7. Preferences in Men & The Concept of "Cutiful"

• Sarah describes her boyfriend as “cutiful” (cute + beautiful), coining a new term and asserting her preference for unconventional attractiveness as a counterweight to conventional beauty.

8. Fragrance Trauma: The Pachuli Rant

• Extended, hilarious “I Don’t Think So, Honey” about Sarah’s favorite patchouli fragrance being reformulated, complete with email bombarding monk-run Italian apothecaries.
  • "Santa Maria Nolla, I don’t think so, honey. You reformulated my patchouli..." (122:55)
  • Describes nostalgia for the old patchouli’s “sticky brown stain” and being told to “get a job, hippie” in elevators.

9. Rapid-Fire Tangents: Bodily Functions, Art, and Banter

• Jokes about boogers, hemorrhoids, toilets, and the line between gross-out and comedic material.
• Discussion of bodily honesty in art:
  • "As someone who loves blood guts shit, piss, boogers... what are we, two?" – Sarah (46:38)
• Loving banter between the trio about wigs, SNL dressing-room moments, and the transformative power of costume.

10. Cultural Critiques & Comedic Bit Highlights

• Matt and Bowen rip on humidifiers in a signature 'I Don’t Think So, Honey' segment:
  • "I don't think so, honey. Humidifier. I'm waking up in the morning, you're blasting off all night in the corner. I'm waking up in the morning, lips still chapped." – Matt (116:24)
• Full reenactment of Laganja Estranja’s Drag Race standup set and meta-discussion about the lasting impact of camp on culture.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On embracing physical weirdness:

  • "I have to say like this because as you know, I came to the studio today with a triangle head." – Sarah (03:20)

• On Twin Peaks:

  • "Once you enter episode two, then it's full lubrication and it's a nonstop roller coaster." – Sarah (44:16)
  • "He posits that true evil was unleashed into every dimension and realm of the universe when the first atomic bomb exploded." – Sarah (50:09)

• On cultural gatekeeping:

  • "It's not culture that you find in a little box at, like, Bucket of Blood Records in Chicago. It's culture that's for everybody." – Sarah (53:05)

• On Housewives Philosophy:

  • "What can you say about a philosopher king?" – Sarah, on Mary Cosby (61:34)
  • "High body count hair." – On Angie serving iconic, campy Housewives lines (71:23)

• On fragrance loss:

  • “My old patchouli formulation... There would be a big brown stain like you spilled soy sauce on you. We're not gonna be just the way I like it.” – Sarah (123:49)

• On comedy and legacy:

  • “This podcast wouldn’t exist. You think this podcast would exist? You think the Comedy Cellar was built in a day?” – Matt (120:54)

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Important Segment Timestamps

• [02:09] Opening banter: laughter as survival, sleep woes
• [03:00] Sarah's explanation of her posture and "triangle head"
• [08:25] Sarah and the hosts break down The Traitors and ideas of evil in reality TV
• [12:11] Sarah’s David Lynch/Twin Peaks philosophy and passionate push for Matt & Bowen to watch
• [14:10] Reflection on prosthetic SNL look, “Monstro” and comedic persona
• [21:04] "Deathbed vibes" and the podcast’s legacy
• [27:08] Long Island childhood memories, ties to Nikki Blonsky
• [31:02] The Substance featurette, admiration for Coralie Fargeat
• [49:09] Twin Peaks’ nuclear thesis and the limits of love’s power
• [56:01] Transition to Housewives opinions
• [61:44] On Mary Cosby as philosopher king
• [116:24] “I Don’t Think So, Honey” - Humidifiers & Patchouli Fragrance Bit

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Flow, Tone, & Atmosphere

• The episode is fast-paced, improvisational, and full of wild tangents.
• Sarah is unleashed: equal parts philosophically earnest, absurdly funny, and gleefully gross.
• Hosts match her chaotic energy, resulting in an episode packed with quotable exchanges, inside jokes, and meta-cultural riffs.
• Recurring tone: irreverent, affectionate, and always circling back to the question: “What made you say culture was for you?”

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For Listeners Who Haven’t Tuned In...

This episode of Las Culturistas is a sprawling, high-energy hangout that covers everything from the metaphysics of Twin Peaks, camp reality TV archetypes, bodily comedy and SNL backstage details, to unique childhood memories and the carnage of reformulated fragrance. You'll leave with a new appreciation for the intersection of sincerity and comedy, a massive list of iconic Housewives, and a burning curiosity about exactly how "sticky brown" a patchouli cologne can be.

If you love:

• Pop culture as high philosophy
• Unfiltered, surreal, late-night energy
• The humor (and therapy) of reality TV
• Camp queer culture and inside jokes
• SNL glow-ups and backstage secrets
• Rants about perfume, bodily woes, and the trauma of growing up weird

...this is peak Las Culturistas. Let Sarah Sherman’s “triangle head” guide you through the Monstro state of mind.

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Summary by segment, key themes, and memorable quotes compiled for listeners seeking a full-frontal blast of pop culture, philosophy, and delirious laughter.

Transcript

[Sarah Sherman]

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[Bowen Yang]

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[Matt Rogers]

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[Bowen Yang]

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[Matt Rogers]

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[Bowen Yang]

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[Matt Rogers]

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[Bowen Yang]

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[Matt Rogers]

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[Bowen Yang]

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[Matt Rogers]

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[Bowen Yang]

Because whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right.

[Matt Rogers]

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[Bowen Yang]

Look, man, there. Oh, I see my eye. Oh my. Bowen, look over there. Wow.

[Matt Rogers]

Is that culture? Yes.

[Sarah Sherman]

Goodness.

[Bowen Yang]

Wow. Las culturistas Ding dong. Las culturistas calling. We needed some laughter today.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh yes, on a week like this. I used to dream of better days.

[Bowen Yang]

I used to dream and I hoped I'd never wake Up.

[Matt Rogers]

I have had my first amazing sleep of I guess the year, but I guess the last like six months.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, I've been sleeping so bad. What would you attribute your good sleep to?

[Matt Rogers]

No more eye mask. No more.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, you're not using it anymore.

[Matt Rogers]

It's crazy. I think it's the winter time. This is so deeply boring to talk about. But I.

[Bowen Yang]

Then let's just skip it.

[Matt Rogers]

Let's skip. We need to talk about. No, no, no.

[Bowen Yang]

Don't. I don't like the posture. It's. I don't like the posture that you have right now.

[Matt Rogers]

I have an frog ass bitch.

[Bowen Yang]

Frog ass bitch.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because I have an explanation as to why I'm sitting like this.

[Matt Rogers]

What's the explanation?

[Sarah Sherman]

Go ahead.

[Bowen Yang]

And so why don't we just. So you had a first thing you wanted to say in quotes.

[Matt Rogers]

Is this the first thing? Sarah brought a gun to the studio.

[Bowen Yang]

That's what she wanted us to say.

[Matt Rogers]

You better. I have a first thing to say. And you better ask me again. Even though this is not what we do with our repeat guests. Ask me again. What was the culture that could be culturist for me? What's your explanation for this?

[Sarah Sherman]

I have to say like this because as you know, I came to the studio today with a triangle head, which.

[Bowen Yang]

Means what is my. Is my hair a triangle?

[Matt Rogers]

A pyramid head like in Silent Hill.

[Bowen Yang]

I couldn't tell if you wanted to be told yes or no.

[Sarah Sherman]

I just like no. If you guys are my friends, you'd be like, girl, you do have triangle heads at night. But that's okay. And just rock it.

[Bowen Yang]

I told you what you have, you have. It's not a triangle shape. It's an isosahedron. A 20 sided figure.

[Matt Rogers]

Not the name, because I said an isosahedron.

[Sarah Sherman]

Boots.

[Bowen Yang]

Can you look that up?

[Matt Rogers]

20 sided.

[Bowen Yang]

A 20 sided figure. Something. Hedron.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh my God. I thought you were kidding for being hilarious.

[Bowen Yang]

I saw Sagan.

[Matt Rogers]

I saw the TV Sagan.

[Bowen Yang]

I saw the TV glow. Cigar.

[Matt Rogers]

I saw the TV glow. Sagan.

[Sarah Sherman]

I had a drink the other night. I saw Sagon.

[Matt Rogers]

Sure.

[Bowen Yang]

Our guest is a cast member on Saturday Night Live. She's been on the show before. She is, you know, just one of our great friends.

[Matt Rogers]

One of our great. Although this is. I can I just said. The Power of the Room. Directed by Jane Champion. The power of the Room. This is the first time the three of us have been in the room together.

[Sarah Sherman]

No.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, you know what happened? I took a very short hiatus. I believe it was a one episode hiatus because you were.

[Matt Rogers]

You Were in Vegas in Kelly Clarkson.

[Bowen Yang]

I was in Vegas doing my thing and you were the guest. And I was like, great. Now I have to have her turn. Obviously right back around and come back.

[Sarah Sherman]

That's actually crazy.

[Bowen Yang]

Why?

[Sarah Sherman]

Because it's. There was one episode you weren't on and it. It just happened to be the episode that your sister was on.

[Bowen Yang]

I know.

[Matt Rogers]

Long Island Runner running.

[Sarah Sherman]

We like the same things. I guess your thing is going to make us see Kelly Larson.

[Matt Rogers]

It would be yours.

[Bowen Yang]

It could be yours too. You want to come? I'm going again to see Mariah Shania.

[Matt Rogers]

I literally just found out that I'm available and I'm going, Mariah Shania.

[Sarah Sherman]

Does that mean I am available too? Or it's.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes, it means you're available too.

[Bowen Yang]

You want to come? Come.

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait. Vegas.

[Bowen Yang]

Vegas. Lost.

[Matt Rogers]

We're going to have such a ball Black.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm a loss.

[Matt Rogers]

Sarah's favorite thing is. And let's examine this. It could be troubling. Is she always. Every week is going. We're blacking out this week at the after party.

[Bowen Yang]

By the way.

[Sarah Sherman]

First of all, never once happens. And number two, guess how much it takes me to black out. Maybe four and a half point two sips of one gin and taco.

[Bowen Yang]

You're not a tank at all.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, no. Not a Sherman tank. As they would like to think Pancakes on the ceiling after a sip.

[Bowen Yang]

You're kidding me. That's disgusting.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, to blackout immediately.

[Bowen Yang]

I thought. Wait. Is pancakes on the ceiling meaning you throw up so hard projectile it hits the ceiling and never comes swallow pancakes.

[Sarah Sherman]

Whole like random sauce.

[Matt Rogers]

Wait, what's the reason you were sitting like that?

[Sarah Sherman]

So I could just like. Kind of like you wouldn't really see the triangle.

[Matt Rogers]

There's no triangle.

[Bowen Yang]

You know what I'm saying?

[Sarah Sherman]

Like, guys, I just feel like he.

[Bowen Yang]

Drawn the correct name of high of it. It's not an ISOs. She clearly said. Becca clearly said she couldn't pronounce it. She threw a bunch of sounds together in her mouth. And you.

[Sarah Sherman]

Rebecca explained it.

[Matt Rogers]

That's Rebecca.

[Bowen Yang]

I've never even thought of you as being a Rebecca.

[Matt Rogers]

You're Becca.

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait. Your necklace literally not to be like this.

[Bowen Yang]

Who she's wearing a Rebecca necklace.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because my mother was like, this is my gift to you in very Latin fashion. I'm going to give you a giant.

[Matt Rogers]

Gold so with your name on it.

[Bowen Yang]

With your name on it.

[Sarah Sherman]

Government name. So cool.

[Matt Rogers]

But I always go, okay.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's very formal to me.

[Matt Rogers]

Rebecca.

[Bowen Yang]

It's sort of like how you forget that My full name is Matthew. If you really think about it for even two seconds, you'll remember, right? But you would have. You wouldn't have known.

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait until you find out about the power of Sarah Nicole.

[Matt Rogers]

Sarah Nicole.

[Bowen Yang]

Sarah Nicole should be your stage name. Sarah. Sarah Nicole.

[Sarah Sherman]

That's my, like, Alley.

[Bowen Yang]

It's like.

[Matt Rogers]

It's like you're on the billboard.

[Bowen Yang]

It's like, I just want to see, like, an Angelina's photo and, like, all over with just, Sarah Nicole, you big titties rocking out.

[Sarah Sherman]

I want. I want a Rebecca nameplate that says Jewish American Princess, while I'm. Sarah Nicole presents.

[Matt Rogers]

Pump it up with Sarah Nicole, Jewish American Princess.

[Bowen Yang]

Don't you know? Pump it up. We have to get into it. Everyone, please welcome into your ears, Sarah Sherman.

[Sarah Sherman]

Sarah triangle Sherman.

[Bowen Yang]

Sarah triangle Sherman. What's the first name? Sarah Nicole.

[Matt Rogers]

Sarah Nicole, what was the first thing you had to say?

[Bowen Yang]

Do you remember what that was it.

[Sarah Sherman]

The triangle. I just had to get it out of the way. I just had to. Because I knew everybody was going to be like, sorry, your readers are going to be opening the book and seeing that I had.

[Bowen Yang]

First of all, I don't make fun of it. I don't like the way that you.

[Matt Rogers]

You bitch.

[Bowen Yang]

You had poison venom wrapped around every word of that. Your readers are gonna open the book.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm feeling naughty today. Okay, so, Sarah naughty today.

[Matt Rogers]

So. Something I can't stop thinking about as we're watching the new season of the Traitors is Sarah has boiled it down to that show basically being people saying to each other.

[Bowen Yang]

People say to each other, this. This. You're being evil. European.

[Sarah Sherman]

All reality and, like, pretense melts away. Forget.

[Bowen Yang]

It's all pretends.

[Sarah Sherman]

But it's like they're forgetting that it's a game, right?

[Bowen Yang]

No, I love that. I love when the lines blur and people are really crying hard and feel betrayed. Like when. Okay, so spoiler alert for the traders. If you haven't watched it, we're going to talk a little bit about it. When Tony got voted out, that was like, crazy. You're a sellout. You're a sellout. You're a sellout.

[Matt Rogers]

Rob, you're a cop. Shut up.

[Sarah Sherman]

You got him last year because he was so, so overwhelmed.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, my God, Yes. I forgot.

[Matt Rogers]

The gentleman said the boxer.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

And that was like, the encapsulation of the problem, which is, like, people, if they're forgetting that it's a game, and they're like, literally, like, you're literally being evil.

[Bowen Yang]

And I'm thinking you're a traitor evil, and your behavior is evil. And it's been evil ever since the traitors were chosen, ever since Alan made his choice. I love whenever they say since Alan made his choice, like, isn't Alan coming himself is actually picking.

[Matt Rogers]

But there's something important in the tone that Sarah is embodying, which is you're.

[Sarah Sherman]

Being evil right now. Wait, do you guys think, like, it's like Dorinda's acting evil right now is acting really evil. And it's like forgetting the fact that it was. Well, that's why they have to say Alan Cumming chose.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, right.

[Sarah Sherman]

So that they remember that evil is not inherent.

[Bowen Yang]

It's a construction.

[Sarah Sherman]

Then they get lost in the sauce and they go like. They start crying. They're like, I have to leave. Because evil is afoot.

[Bowen Yang]

To think that people can. Well, here's a question. Do you believe people are born wicked or do they have wickedness thrust upon them?

[Sarah Sherman]

And this actually goes into the other second thing I had to say with coming into the studio with a gun.

[Bowen Yang]

We didn't even know you had a second thing.

[Matt Rogers]

Right. You didn't tell us anything.

[Bowen Yang]

More information. We just knew there was a first.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, remember when I said I texted you guys and I was like, so when are you gonna ask me, like, what culture is for me?

[Matt Rogers]

We already asked you the first time you were on the show.

[Bowen Yang]

This is your third appearance, quite frankly. We've had it, Pee Wee. We understand.

[Matt Rogers]

Pee Wee.

[Bowen Yang]

Talk about it again.

[Sarah Sherman]

There is a diff. And it explains, actually how I feel about the. The nature of good and evil.

[Bowen Yang]

Okay, okay.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because actually.

[Bowen Yang]

So what was the culture that made you say culture was for you, Sarah?

[Matt Rogers]

Tell us.

[Bowen Yang]

Tell us.

[Sarah Sherman]

This is the laughing episode. It's the worst one, literally. Well, it can be explained. Let's just take a moment because we're about to miss the worldwide meditation because we're recording this podcast in honor of David Lynch's memory.

[Matt Rogers]

I was just gonna say you're perfect person to have on this week for many reasons by David Lynch. For so many reasons. Because it's the laughing episode.

[Bowen Yang]

It's the laughing episode. The substance is about to rack up lots of Oscar nominations.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah, it's about to rack. I think I was literally thinking I was sitting on the toilet as I. You know, as I do. As we all do, where you do.

[Bowen Yang]

Your best thinking and shitting, of course.

[Sarah Sherman]

How did you find out? That's what I was gonna say.

[Matt Rogers]

What?

[Sarah Sherman]

Did you know you're not supposed to sit on the toilet for longer than 10 minutes. Have you ever.

[Matt Rogers]

Have you something more unfair?

[Bowen Yang]

It's really, it's such a beautiful place.

[Matt Rogers]

It's the best place to stay.

[Sarah Sherman]

Remain.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, I love remaining there. Woo. I sit there sometimes and I'm like, I'm gonna remain.

[Matt Rogers]

Remain. Not exit. Remain.

[Bowen Yang]

No, I will remain.

[Sarah Sherman]

What am I thinking of? What remains? Is that an Oprah's bestseller?

[Bowen Yang]

What remains?

[Matt Rogers]

Oprah's bestseller?

[Bowen Yang]

Is that an Oprah's bestseller?

[Sarah Sherman]

What remains? Does anyone have the capability of Googling?

[Bowen Yang]

You're thinking of what lies beneath.

[Matt Rogers]

What lies beneath.

[Bowen Yang]

You're thinking of what happened by Hillary Clinton, which was about the election.

[Sarah Sherman]

But what I've got to do. What remains. Oh, awesome.

[Bowen Yang]

What remains?

[Sarah Sherman]

Thing I've accessed.

[Matt Rogers]

I think you're thinking of. You're thinking of the Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think that's what I'm thinking.

[Bowen Yang]

So what was the culture that made you say culture?

[Sarah Sherman]

I do think I really. I think we do have to be taking a moment for last cultures to say David Lynch.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay, so I think I'm producing you that I basically know nothing. I am so illiterate with David.

[Bowen Yang]

We've actually been saying now for several months that we're going to get into Twin Peaks.

[Sarah Sherman]

You at this point, you know why you guys should. You love beautiful women and you love intrigue.

[Matt Rogers]

Love.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, that's actually true.

[Matt Rogers]

That's so true.

[Sarah Sherman]

And I don't want to spoil anything, but basically in the larger, in the three season arc of Twin Peaks, you guys are looking at me so seriously.

[Matt Rogers]

Because you're a true expert.

[Sarah Sherman]

I just think that it's like you guys really take women's voices seriously.

[Matt Rogers]

You literally go, you guys are being evil.

[Bowen Yang]

You guys are being evil.

[Sarah Sherman]

You guys are actually really evil.

[Bowen Yang]

Do you think you'd be a good trader or a bad trader?

[Matt Rogers]

You'd be an amazing traitor.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think I would. No, because remember, every time in a sketch I have to act seriously.

[Matt Rogers]

Well, you're like Carolyn in a way. Like, you're like, you're so hard to pin down.

[Sarah Sherman]

Thank you for saying that. It's like she's acting crazy.

[Matt Rogers]

She's a genius, right? It's like you're both the same in that way. Everyone's like, oh, Sarah's being Sarah. But in fact, she is deep down.

[Sarah Sherman]

But do the face that I do when I'm trying to act serious.

[Bowen Yang]

This is, this is.

[Matt Rogers]

If you tell Sarah she has to like be like serious or keep a straight face in a sketch, this is, this is the best she can do.

[Bowen Yang]

I noticed it you doing straight man role is my favorite thing.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because it's like we are on stage doing a comedy show, by the way, right?

[Bowen Yang]

And we're supposed to.

[Matt Rogers]

But you. But Sarah. But Sarah is truly joy personifying.

[Bowen Yang]

And then, like, I happen to be.

[Sarah Sherman]

Laughing, and then they're like, oh, you're in a court scene. And so I'm like.

[Bowen Yang]

Can you do your court face, please?

[Matt Rogers]

But Sarah was in the Nosferatu prosthetics this Saturday. She slayed, by the way. And meanwhile, like, she's supposed to look terrifying, but everyone's like, that's the most adorable person I've ever seen.

[Sarah Sherman]

Ruby McAllister did call me at 10am the next morning and said, did you know that you actually looked like a supermodel? It was, like, insane.

[Bowen Yang]

You did. You were so captivating.

[Sarah Sherman]

You've never looked more beautiful.

[Bowen Yang]

I was calling to say that. Did you know you actually looked a supermodel?

[Sarah Sherman]

And I was like, no, I know. My arms look so skinny. It was like, insane. Cause, like, when. When you have a hunchback, it, like, kind of like does the optical illusion where it's like your arm actually starts.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, you do like the Lea Michele thing.

[Matt Rogers]

Like this. Yeah, yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

She can.

[Bowen Yang]

You were Monstro.

[Matt Rogers]

You were Monstro.

[Bowen Yang]

But, like, skinny, chic, hot, right? Cigarette dangling from the lips.

[Matt Rogers]

Nos vasera. Nos vasera Monstro Nostra Serra heroin chic.

[Bowen Yang]

Nosaro too Monstro.

[Sarah Sherman]

Nos for Serra Monstro Sara Nicolasu hedle.

[Bowen Yang]

Of episode Monstros era Nicole, when you.

[Sarah Sherman]

Say title of app, it like this, how I know you're a professional? The way it rolls off the tongue, like, without barrier.

[Bowen Yang]

That's how you know, how you know I'm professional. The way it rolls off my tongue. I know when we get the title and Monstro, Sarah Nicole, is the title.

[Sarah Sherman]

The first thing that happens when I'm having a laughing attack is sweating before laughing coming out of my mouth.

[Bowen Yang]

That's amazing.

[Sarah Sherman]

Like, you can probably see it glistening and think it's like a dewy sheen. But I'm profusely sweating because I'm laughing so hard.

[Bowen Yang]

Wait on sweating. Just to. Just to talk about the traitors one more time. What is going on with Sandoval?

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, I think he's on, like, crack.

[Bowen Yang]

Is he having some sort of withdrawal?

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, it's withdrawal. That's what it is.

[Bowen Yang]

He hears the Vanderpump rules. He never acts like that. He goes to a Scottish palace where they have no phones or he has to travel internationally. Yeah. And then suddenly he can't bring the drudge over. He couldn't sit still. Still. And he's sweating so much more than totally.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes.

[Sarah Sherman]

Can I tell you guys actually something that I was too afraid to admit like four minutes ago.

[Bowen Yang]

You don't have to be afraid in here.

[Sarah Sherman]

I, I as soon as they spoiler alert. As soon as they stop watching. As soon as they voted off Dorinda, I literally this was, I was watching with my boyfriend. I went like this.

[Matt Rogers]

What's the whole rat.

[Sarah Sherman]

I can't keep. I can't hold my attention.

[Bowen Yang]

It was actually really rough because they they voted out some good people. Really?

[Sarah Sherman]

They fucked up. That is the survivor people that have gone.

[Bowen Yang]

It's kind of a shame.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah. Wait, who?

[Bowen Yang]

Because then Tony and Jeremy. Jeremy.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Tony. That's crazy.

[Bowen Yang]

Are you not caught up?

[Sarah Sherman]

No, I'm not kidding. Every time my boyfriend and I'm straight by the way.

[Bowen Yang]

That's okay.

[Sarah Sherman]

Don't let the shirt betray you. I'm standing with my straight girl.

[Bowen Yang]

We all chose fashion.

[Sarah Sherman]

What did I say about your shirt?

[Matt Rogers]

Tell them Thanksgiving spongebob.

[Sarah Sherman]

Cuz look.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh that's what you meant.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, no, that's what she meant.

[Matt Rogers]

I was like what spongebob?

[Bowen Yang]

Is this the sponge? Like I thought she was like a character on bottom.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm like oh, you thought I was calling you like ransom.

[Bowen Yang]

He thought you were just being a.

[Sarah Sherman]

I take back what I said about how you guys feel about women.

[Matt Rogers]

I mean. Yeah, exactly.

[Bowen Yang]

It's really touch and go. I'm a misogynist.

[Matt Rogers]

Huh.

[Bowen Yang]

I don't think so many gay guys. What about us? What about gay guys go on rights being taken away. You know it's not just Katie's that listen. Some gay guys do listen still hot ones too. Yeah. Kyle's.

[Sarah Sherman]

That's Kyle.

[Bowen Yang]

There's a subgroup that we actually we said that we would officially induct them.

[Matt Rogers]

No, we can't have five.

[Bowen Yang]

What do you mean? They said we couldn't have two. They said we couldn't have three. They said we couldn't have four. Kyle's.

[Matt Rogers]

Welcome.

[Bowen Yang]

Welcome, Kyle.

[Sarah Sherman]

We love the Kyle that's with you guys.

[Matt Rogers]

It's crazy. It's crazy. I'm. I think about Sarah every day and I smile.

[Sarah Sherman]

I have nothing to contribute to the conversation because I just want to sit here and smile. I just want to go.

[Bowen Yang]

Guys, can I tell you who'd be so furious about that? All the Kyle's. They want to hear from you. Really? Yeah. They're.

[Matt Rogers]

You're oh yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

You know that you're a gay icon.

[Sarah Sherman]

Are You. I'm not kidding. Like, I don't take that lightly and I shouldn't.

[Bowen Yang]

If you did, that would be fucked up.

[Sarah Sherman]

I know.

[Bowen Yang]

Especially now in the time that we're.

[Sarah Sherman]

In, he's sworn in like, right? He's getting sworn in like, oh, no.

[Bowen Yang]

I watched the whole thing.

[Sarah Sherman]

How is was he surveyed?

[Bowen Yang]

Can I tell you something? Here's my three takeaways. It was hell and like a funeral. Two, One nice thing. I'll say I did like Melania's hat. Three. Carrie Underwood sounded bad. And for all of that to go down and for her to sound strained and shouty.

[Sarah Sherman]

Really?

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. It was not good.

[Sarah Sherman]

And are you a Carrie girl or.

[Bowen Yang]

I can't say. I was never identified.

[Matt Rogers]

Never really were Carrie girl.

[Bowen Yang]

I've never really given her propers on this show. You want to know what it is? I've always not had the best feeling on the vibes.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, yeah. The vibes have always been weird. But does this make you go buyer's remorse on Beau Bias? Do we as a culture need to bring Bo Bis back?

[Bowen Yang]

Well, I was a Von Zell Solomon girly from the beginning. And we love Von Zell and I love Von Zell. And Von Zell was the singer for Game show on Quibi, period.

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait, who was? Long Hair Bob Ice. I got my first period while Bo Vice was on.

[Matt Rogers]

And that's the culture that made you say menarche? I'm bleeding.

[Sarah Sherman]

And I acted like it wasn't happening.

[Bowen Yang]

Do you remember what song he was singing? It was always some variation of Mama Lemon Grades are Hannah Cold and Mama. I'm sure the Hannah gets around.

[Sarah Sherman]

Was it that because the way that. Just like a reptilian like chill to the base of my spine. He had a brown suede jacket on and was holding a guitar.

[Bowen Yang]

He was always when it happened, tone on tone perfectly. Like flat ironed hair, like really straight stuff laid.

[Sarah Sherman]

When you guys said bois, I thought the guy with the gray hair who was hot.

[Bowen Yang]

He was hot.

[Matt Rogers]

Sarah, you need to describe your perfect looking man.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, describe your perfect man.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know what I think it is? I want to preface this by saying I think because I've been a lot of prefacing and pretensing today. I think because my boyfriend, Strange Dragon.

[Bowen Yang]

Put your weapons down. Put your weapons down.

[Sarah Sherman]

I come in peace day, guys.

[Bowen Yang]

They're called Kyle's.

[Sarah Sherman]

I come in peace Kyle's and Katie's alike. And Mariah's and Shanias.

[Bowen Yang]

They're not listening. Mariah forgot she did this.

[Sarah Sherman]

Deathbed vibes when Y' all are on your deathbed like this.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Angel style. You can go like, we did that.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know, period.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, we're gonna say we ate that.

[Matt Rogers]

And what, when we're 79, we're still.

[Bowen Yang]

Gonna be like, twerk and serve and slay. We ate that down.

[Sarah Sherman]

We tore deathbed for you two is gonna be one 115 years old.

[Bowen Yang]

I can actually see it.

[Matt Rogers]

I can.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

I don't want to live that long.

[Bowen Yang]

He's gonna look the same. I'm gonna look like Nosferatu. And not the chic. Heroin chic.

[Sarah Sherman]

Honey, I'm so old. I'm Nosferat3.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, damn.

[Bowen Yang]

You dragged yourself there.

[Sarah Sherman]

Old.

[Bowen Yang]

Old. Okay, wait, so where we were on a thing.

[Matt Rogers]

The perfect man. The perfect man.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think, because Taylor Hicks. Because I think my beautiful, long suffering boyfriend is so.

[Matt Rogers]

He's so, like.

[Sarah Sherman]

He's so, like standard. Cute, attractive.

[Matt Rogers]

So lovely.

[Sarah Sherman]

And, you know, he invented a new term.

[Matt Rogers]

What?

[Sarah Sherman]

It's cutiful. It's when something's cute and beautiful.

[Bowen Yang]

Isn't that beautiful?

[Matt Rogers]

Isn't that lovely? Beautiful.

[Bowen Yang]

That's really good.

[Sarah Sherman]

Isn't that crazy?

[Bowen Yang]

Where's he from? We want to hear about him. Where's he from originally?

[Matt Rogers]

Is he from south side of Chicago?

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, boy.

[Bowen Yang]

All right.

[Sarah Sherman]

And like, he's from a town called Flossmoor. So you, of course, you get building jokes like, I wish you'd floss.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, well, why bleeding? I don't floss.

[Sarah Sherman]

You don't? You're a liar.

[Matt Rogers]

I don't.

[Sarah Sherman]

You have the nicest teeth in show business.

[Bowen Yang]

So it just goes to show what they're telling you is not true. You don't have to do it.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, but did you ever have braces?

[Matt Rogers]

No.

[Sarah Sherman]

You're lying.

[Bowen Yang]

And some people think I have crooked teeth, but it's because I talk out of one side of my mouth with.

[Sarah Sherman]

A smirk like Rachel Maddow. Something I found out when I had to do my research.

[Matt Rogers]

Of course. You ate that, by the way.

[Sarah Sherman]

No, by the way. You know, I. The second my toe came off stage, every single person was like, he. You messed up all your words.

[Bowen Yang]

Who said that?

[Sarah Sherman]

Everyone.

[Matt Rogers]

It was live television.

[Sarah Sherman]

Try saying MSNBC 10 times fast.

[Bowen Yang]

MSNBC.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, okay. I had to say it one time. And I said mfnb, A B.

[Bowen Yang]

You're trying not to say it. You could do it if you really applied yourself.

[Matt Rogers]

You were. You were straining so hard playing a lesbian.

[Sarah Sherman]

I know.

[Matt Rogers]

You're such a stragg.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think that's what happened. And then my brain just Started, like, fritting out.

[Bowen Yang]

You are a straggat.

[Matt Rogers]

You really are.

[Sarah Sherman]

Literally. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

[Bowen Yang]

Can I ask you something? Before you got emotional when we said that you were a gay icon and that you really don't take it lightly, talk about that.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because, I mean, not to be like this, please. Who do you think, besides David lynch built culture as we know it? Gay guys.

[Matt Rogers]

Literally.

[Bowen Yang]

Gay guys say Oprah feels like you took that away from her, from black women. That sucks for you to rob black women of that, especially this week.

[Sarah Sherman]

Does anyone know?

[Bowen Yang]

It really is really hurtful.

[Sarah Sherman]

Didn't she? Okay, I dreamed this or it was real and I'm not gonna look it up because that's. I don't need to be, like, interfacing with screens right now. Didn't she have an episode where she had a bunch of pedophiles on?

[Matt Rogers]

Well, she had an episode where she.

[Bowen Yang]

Had a bunch of pedophiles on. And then I think she had another.

[Matt Rogers]

Episode where she added victims of Today.

[Bowen Yang]

We're hearing the other side.

[Sarah Sherman]

I just have this, like, strong memory of her being like, I was like two or whatever, like, this big. And there was, like, a bunch of pedophiles on. She was like, it sucks that you guys, like, want to have sex with kids. And then I was, like, watching. Being like, that does suck. Oh, my God, that sucks.

[Bowen Yang]

I agree with Oprah. I have to say in this dialogue, I'm team Oprah.

[Matt Rogers]

I'm team Oprah.

[Sarah Sherman]

It just. Meanwhile me being eight, being like, I wish an adult wanted to have sex with me. I was in love with all my teachers.

[Bowen Yang]

Hey, were you really?

[Sarah Sherman]

Of course. I was like, precocious little bitch.

[Bowen Yang]

Who was the.

[Matt Rogers]

Who was the one?

[Bowen Yang]

Wow. She's moaning and growing. So is this out of shame or out of pure sexual frustration?

[Sarah Sherman]

It is just like, I'm afraid you're.

[Matt Rogers]

Sweating in your other lips.

[Bowen Yang]

Jesus.

[Sarah Sherman]

Hello, nurse. I'm afraid of saying his full name because you could find him.

[Bowen Yang]

Don't say his full name. Just say what he taught and what his vibe was.

[Sarah Sherman]

I had an English teacher. This is gonna send you guys to the moon in a. Not SpaceX rocket ship. In a normal rocket ship.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay?

[Bowen Yang]

Normal one that uses American gas. Drill. Baby drill. Something Trump said today at the.

[Sarah Sherman]

About what?

[Bowen Yang]

I don't. About Kraken. That sounds like a baby drill. Anyway, what were you saying?

[Matt Rogers]

Okay, so this.

[Bowen Yang]

This teacher.

[Matt Rogers]

English teacher.

[Sarah Sherman]

English teacher. He had a gray and red long beard.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay.

[Sarah Sherman]

Red gray hair combed over to the side, much like our president Combed over.

[Bowen Yang]

Age demographic 100, like, legit.

[Sarah Sherman]

100 years old, every day. Would wear, like, a Snoopy tie.

[Bowen Yang]

And the character Snoopy.

[Sarah Sherman]

The character Snoopy. Humor, a funny little tie.

[Bowen Yang]

And he.

[Sarah Sherman]

Me and my best friend in high school, Emily, would sit in the parking lot and watch him smoke his pipe in his car during lunch break and just be like, that is so fucking hot.

[Matt Rogers]

It's giving. What's the guy's name?

[Sarah Sherman]

The Giver.

[Matt Rogers]

The Give. It's Giving. The Giver. Oh, my God.

[Bowen Yang]

Giving.

[Matt Rogers]

The Giver.

[Bowen Yang]

And I was. I was saying Vincent Van Gogh in my head.

[Sarah Sherman]

Not. Not dissimilar.

[Matt Rogers]

Not.

[Sarah Sherman]

He actually quite looked like him.

[Matt Rogers]

Who's the Watchmen guy? Alan Moore. Alan Moore. It's giving. Alan Moore with a Snoopy tie. That's hot.

[Sarah Sherman]

And he would smoke a pipe in his car, and me and Emily would just, like, watch him in his car and be like.

[Bowen Yang]

Are you still in touch with Emily?

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, of course.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Emily, hello, if you're listening, this is.

[Matt Rogers]

The thing about Long island, is that y' all keep in touch with high school.

[Bowen Yang]

Definitely. I texted my friend Allison last night.

[Sarah Sherman]

Is it hey?

[Bowen Yang]

I said, hey. Well, we had a mutual friend at the birthday party we were at.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, cute.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh. And said, like, let's go to Roosevelt Field, get our ears pierced.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, my God, I wish I could go to Roosevelt Field. But it was. It was too far.

[Sarah Sherman]

Were you Walt Whitman Mall?

[Bowen Yang]

No, I was Sunrise Mall. Like, Southwest vibes.

[Sarah Sherman]

You are. So I have to give respect to you because, like, honestly, something crazier to even more iconic to say than you're a gay icon. You are actual Long island legend. Like, you are not from. We're fudgeing around. Long. You are from, like, a Long Island. Long Island.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm for real. Yeah, he's definitely for real.

[Sarah Sherman]

You're new to this. He's true to this.

[Matt Rogers]

I'm always new to this. Anytime I go to Long Island, I go, whoa.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's. No one knows what happened to us.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's so crazy, the things that we saw, the things we did.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. And the things that we, you know, aspired to be.

[Matt Rogers]

Name the craziest thing from.

[Sarah Sherman]

From Nikki Blonsky.

[Bowen Yang]

I mean, just. What did you say?

[Sarah Sherman]

Nikki Blonsky.

[Bowen Yang]

Nikki Blonsky. She's a lion legend.

[Sarah Sherman]

Her mom once came up to me.

[Bowen Yang]

You're kidding.

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait, I actually have the chills.

[Bowen Yang]

Vicki Blonsky's mother came up to me. Where?

[Sarah Sherman]

Came up to me at my school. I think she came to my school.

[Bowen Yang]

To perform, and she.

[Sarah Sherman]

I Felt like they were scouting and.

[Matt Rogers]

I was like, for Hairspray.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, my God, that's perfect.

[Sarah Sherman]

No, I don't. What did she say?

[Matt Rogers]

You even heard a penny?

[Bowen Yang]

That's fucking Little Shop.

[Sarah Sherman]

What did she say?

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, no. The movie Nikki Blonsky was in. What did she say?

[Sarah Sherman]

Me knowing, like, two musical songs.

[Bowen Yang]

We gotta take her to a Broadway show. Sarah.

[Sarah Sherman]

I just know I would die for kinky boots. We had a kinky boots sketch idea.

[Matt Rogers]

What was our kinky.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. What's that? Why was it. Why did you.

[Matt Rogers]

We wanted a sequel to the Shrek the Musical special.

[Bowen Yang]

What was the kinky boots bit gonna be?

[Sarah Sherman]

You come out with the boot on your feet. You're clearly putting on the kinky boots.

[Bowen Yang]

What is it, Mathilde?

[Matt Rogers]

You clearly put on the kinky boots. Writing that sketch was a highlight of my life.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's so rare to channel.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, we channeled.

[Bowen Yang]

Did you?

[Sarah Sherman]

To let the muse visit.

[Matt Rogers]

We literally plopped it down in one run and we were like, it's perfect.

[Bowen Yang]

Have you ever seen Hamilton the Musical?

[Sarah Sherman]

I know that. How could a bastard orphan.

[Matt Rogers]

That's not. You would love it. Really? It's a great show.

[Bowen Yang]

And also, if nothing else, like, it's production value.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes.

[Sarah Sherman]

I don't. Don't get me started on that, because I'm feeling really emotional about production value lately.

[Matt Rogers]

What's. What's going on?

[Sarah Sherman]

What do you just, like, give it to me and I'm not. You guys know who you are who aren't giving it to me? Just in general.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

I want to see lights, camera, sound, sets, costume.

[Bowen Yang]

Can we get really into this, though? We watched the substance together and I did think of you. Did you? Did you love that movie?

[Sarah Sherman]

I basically loved it more than words can even express. Same.

[Matt Rogers]

And I finally watched that 30 minute feature that's on YouTube.

[Bowen Yang]

So good. You have to check that out. If you haven't.

[Sarah Sherman]

Fucking holding the camera running backwards, hosing everyone down with blood. I'm like, that's. If you want to know how it's done, that's how it's done.

[Bowen Yang]

You need to work with her.

[Sarah Sherman]

I literally let this be a message.

[Matt Rogers]

Do you want to talk about this?

[Sarah Sherman]

Coralie, I love you and what you've done and what you will continue to do and what has happened and what will soon to be happening all over until, like, the perpetuity. Till the end of time. Like, what was I saying?

[Bowen Yang]

You were saying a lot. And all of it is impacting exactly. Hearing one.

[Sarah Sherman]

Kali, you did it. You did it.

[Bowen Yang]

Can I Correct.

[Sarah Sherman]

You.

[Bowen Yang]

You did that.

[Sarah Sherman]

You did that when it kept going. When it just kept going. And then the teeth and then the ears and then the blood hose and the music and the lights, camera, sound, costume, whatever.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

As we were just saying, it didn't for one second stop. It gave us everything. Relentlessly and more.

[Bowen Yang]

It's incredible.

[Matt Rogers]

Fixed film.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's a perfect, perfect film. It's hilarious.

[Matt Rogers]

Down, down.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's go. It's, as you say, feast for the eyes.

[Matt Rogers]

Feast for the eyes.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's everything. It was. She's my favorite. She's everything.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah. There's been little meanings.

[Sarah Sherman]

There's a listen.

[Matt Rogers]

You've met a couple times.

[Sarah Sherman]

We met one time.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, really?

[Sarah Sherman]

I was struck by her beauty.

[Bowen Yang]

Yes, she is.

[Sarah Sherman]

She's gorgeous, she's stunning and she's hilarious.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

When did you meet her?

[Sarah Sherman]

I.

[Matt Rogers]

Luncheon.

[Sarah Sherman]

I've been, like, stalking her. For real, because I just like. I'm like, you're amazing.

[Bowen Yang]

Were you a fan prior to seeing the Substance? Like, did you. Revenge.

[Sarah Sherman]

I love revenge.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

And I love every. You know when you, like, see someone's movie and you're like, I hope see words escape me. That's how much I care.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah. Oh, that's.

[Sarah Sherman]

And like, you could just see, like. It's like she's such a, like, fan of horror movies too. And so it's like as a fan of the thing, as a fan of like Basket Case or whatever, you watch that movie and you're like, yay. Thank you. This feels like a Christmas. Christmas tree.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

Amazing.

[Sarah Sherman]

I know. And just like, I. Yeah, she's just.

[Matt Rogers]

Listen, you're at a loss for words.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm at a loss for words.

[Bowen Yang]

Were you a Demi and Margaret fan prior to this or did this expose you to their gifts?

[Sarah Sherman]

The both of them fans? Yeah, both of them fans. But, like, now I am on my knees, forever in their debt, basically.

[Bowen Yang]

I see their names called tomorrow.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, I hope so, too.

[Sarah Sherman]

Who's calling?

[Bowen Yang]

Do you know?

[Matt Rogers]

I'm. I'm calling.

[Bowen Yang]

Bowen. Bowen and Rachel Sennett are announcing our nominations. Can you believe that Big day for.

[Matt Rogers]

Union hall that we said.

[Bowen Yang]

Huge day for Union Hall. Union hall truly won.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, my gosh.

[Matt Rogers]

Isn't that wild?

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait, it's. You're going tomorrow?

[Matt Rogers]

No, no, this comes out Wednesday and then I'm going to be. I'm literally leaving, read through and catching a plane to LA. And then Thursday morning, 5:30am PT, we're announcing. And then I got to fly back for.

[Bowen Yang]

I wouldn't miss it. I think it's such an honor.

[Matt Rogers]

No, I know. I'm. I'm so honored.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's like literally the coolest thing.

[Bowen Yang]

I love that. I want to. I aspire to announce the nominations.

[Sarah Sherman]

Marlins things.

[Matt Rogers]

He always marlins you small and because.

[Bowen Yang]

You know, first of all, we're not talking about him. Harmful individuals today who gave us a laugh.

[Sarah Sherman]

If we're talking about the laughing.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, he gave us a laugh.

[Sarah Sherman]

There's a couple laughs. It's like he goes, oh, like I'm gonna be announcing the Oscar. Like, that's how he says it. This is how he delivers.

[Matt Rogers]

It's not how I deliver it, but you.

[Sarah Sherman]

I know you have to smile on it because you're just trying to keep your head on your shoulders and you're like clocking in and clock. Like, it's like if things were too big, like, you would almost be scared to do it.

[Matt Rogers]

Totally.

[Sarah Sherman]

But it's like, that is. That is major.

[Bowen Yang]

You're right. He does. He smallens things. But he's excited.

[Matt Rogers]

I'm excited.

[Bowen Yang]

What if your wifi wasn't just WI fi, but the magic holding your whole holiday together?

[Matt Rogers]

Well, with Xfinity WI Fi, it kind of is.

[Bowen Yang]

Picture this. Powered by their best, most elite high performing tech, this WiFi doesn't just connect devices. It keeps the peace at home during the most wonderful and most stressful time of the year.

[Matt Rogers]

It's kind of like having a little holiday helper working behind the scenes, making sure the holiday playlist never skips the beat. And the video call with grandma doesn't freeze me Cookie tutorial.

[Bowen Yang]

It's wifi that keeps your whole home connected so you can actually enjoy the holiday magic chaos free. The best present of all.

[Matt Rogers]

Let me paint a picture for you. A holiday movie marathon is streaming in the living room. Your kid is video chatting their friends from their tablet, and your partner is shopping for too many gifts and cinnamon candles.

[Bowen Yang]

Ugh.

[Matt Rogers]

Not this season. Not with Xfinity WiFi.

[Bowen Yang]

With Xfinity, you can boost the wifi to your device only. So when you go to upload 200 photos of that cat in a cute little Santa hat, you won't see that dreaded failed to upload message. Not this season. Not with Xfinity WiFi. And what if you had a way to make sure family time during the holidays had zero distractions? With Xfinity WI Fi, you can pause the kids wi fi and enjoy those special moments together.

[Matt Rogers]

And if you're wondering what other parental instincts your wifi has during this busy season, Xfinity protects your kids when they're online so you know they're safe. Even if you're busy making cocoa or taste testing cookies.

[Bowen Yang]

What? Someone has to make sure there's exactly the same amount of chocolate chips in each cookie. And what if your WI Fi could proactively fix issues before they even happen? Well, that's exactly what Xfinity WI Fi does. Like the friend who shows up with extra wrapping paper, bows and tape before you even realize you're out. Because, let's be honest, you never buy enough.

[Matt Rogers]

Bottom line, Xfinity WI Fi isn't just smart, it's brilliant. And during the holidays, that brilliance, that's a gift. Xfinity. Imagine that you ever just stop in.

[Bowen Yang]

The middle of a crazy day and realize, wow, I needed a break.

[Matt Rogers]

It literally happened to me yesterday. I cracked open a Diet Coke, sat back for five minutes. Total reset, right?

[Bowen Yang]

There's something about the crispy, refreshing taste of an ice cold Diet Coke. It just hits.

[Matt Rogers]

It's my little me moment. Like, make time for a Diet Coke break, you know?

[Bowen Yang]

Exactly. Diet Coke is the perfect companion for all break moments. Diet Coke. This is my taste. Two questions. What are you doing right now? And why aren't you on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean Cruise?

[Matt Rogers]

Well, obviously you were listening to us. Smart use of your time.

[Bowen Yang]

True. But you could also be on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise at the same time. That's just brilliant time management.

[Matt Rogers]

Very true. This gives me an idea. Let's do a quick cruise quiz. Ready? First, cruise. Dining. Do you prefer a buffet or a curated dining experience with access to 20 distinct restaurants?

[Bowen Yang]

Curated dining. Next.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay, good choice. That's what Virgin Voyages offers. Second question. Would you rather have an overstuffed itinerary or the freedom to explore some stunning.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, I want the freedom to explore stunning Caribbean destinations. Again, I think I see where this quiz is going. Virgin Voyages is amazing.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, Absolutely. The cruises are kid free. From sunrise yoga to late night cocktails, every moment is made for grownup fun.

[Bowen Yang]

Nothing against kids. Kids are awesome. But sometimes it's nice to be kid free.

[Matt Rogers]

And there's so much included value. Over $1,000.

[Bowen Yang]

Over $1,000 of awesomeness. All included. Wi Fi soda, top tier entertainment, over 20 restaurants, and even group fitness classes. No hidden fees, no surprise charges. Virgin Voyages gives you the kind of luxury you actually deserve.

[Sarah Sherman]

And you know what?

[Matt Rogers]

I deserve luxury.

[Bowen Yang]

You do? And me too. Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

There's always something happening on board. From wellness focused sailings to epic holiday voyages. Live music, DJs, themed parties, and more. Boredom doesn't board the ship.

[Bowen Yang]

And there are so many amazing stops. You leave from Miami and sail to places like Grand Cayman, Jamaica, Puerto Rico and the Dominican Republic. Virgin even has their own private beach club in Bimini. And they're adding stops in 2025 and 2026.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, like Aruba, St. Lucia and Curacao.

[Bowen Yang]

But it's not all go, go, go.

[Matt Rogers]

Right? You can totally go into relaxation mode too. Your cabin is a full on sanctuary, private terrace, ocean views, and their signature red hammock just waiting for you to swing.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, and did I mention? Virgin Voyages is launching a new ship. The brilliant lady. Brilliant name, by the way. She's bigger, bolder, and packed with even more Virgin Wow factories.

[Matt Rogers]

Book [e-mail] or contact your travel advisor.

[Bowen Yang]

That's virginvoyages.com do you know what the.

[Matt Rogers]

Perfect thing to bring to any event is? Any dinner, any little party, any occasion. Formal, casual, you name it.

[Bowen Yang]

What's that?

[Matt Rogers]

Casamigos.

[Bowen Yang]

Wow, that really is chic.

[Matt Rogers]

Right? There's nothing like having Casamigos at a party with your friends.

[Bowen Yang]

That makes sense, seeing as Casamigos whole vibe is friendship. It's literally in the name.

[Matt Rogers]

I didn't realize that. Well, the vibe is working because everyone loves it. It's good with anything. Watermelon juice, Bloody Mary mix, coconut, grapefruit, diet freaking cola. Crying out loud.

[Bowen Yang]

The deepest friendships have been forged over Casamigos margaritas.

[Matt Rogers]

A Casamigos margarita. Now that's a slay.

[Bowen Yang]

Casamigos. Anything is a sleigh.

[Matt Rogers]

Anything goes with my Casamigos.

[Bowen Yang]

That is so true.

[Matt Rogers]

You can thank me later. Please drink responsibly. Imported by Casamigos Spirits Company, White Plains, New York. Cas amigos. Tequila. 40% alcohol by volume.

[Bowen Yang]

Is that leaf bothering you on your head?

[Matt Rogers]

Okay.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, man.

[Bowen Yang]

Cuz, did you notice that my girl has a leaf. Leaf on her head?

[Sarah Sherman]

No, it's.

[Matt Rogers]

It's not on.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, it's very.

[Sarah Sherman]

What's gonna be yours?

[Matt Rogers]

What's gonna be yours?

[Bowen Yang]

Gorgeous head.

[Matt Rogers]

Gorgeous head.

[Bowen Yang]

Stunning head.

[Sarah Sherman]

Say this.

[Bowen Yang]

Toe head.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm changing that.

[Matt Rogers]

What? Say this, say this, say this. But this is my theory. The word. That is so powerful. So powerful. The way it hits the ear is just different. It's really.

[Bowen Yang]

I was watching a body language expert talk about Blake Lively. Oh, just let that sink in. I was watching a body language expert talk about Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni, and there was a moment where an interview says to Blake Lively, like, well, you actually had to be the intimacy coordinator on set. Like, you had to show him how to grab you and Kiss you. And she goes, where did you see this? And the body language expert said that use of the word this is usually to, like, show that you disdain whatever it is they've brought up. Like, oh, what's all this? What's. What do you mean by this?

[Sarah Sherman]

What's all this then?

[Bowen Yang]

This. What's all this then? The word. The word this is rarely used positively or inclusively.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm picturing when you say this, something that's just coming to mind is like peeling dirty underwear off the floor.

[Matt Rogers]

A wife. What is this?

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah, a wife coming home, peels a woman's underwear from the bottom of the. The basket and going, what is this? To my husband, I've been working all day. And whose is this? You wanna say, what is that?

[Matt Rogers]

You just ate that line read, by the way. What is this again?

[Sarah Sherman]

No, again.

[Bowen Yang]

Think about this.

[Sarah Sherman]

The directors out there. I'm free.

[Bowen Yang]

Think about this. Who did this?

[Sarah Sherman]

Okay, now. Now say that. Sorry.

[Bowen Yang]

Who did this?

[Matt Rogers]

Now do the other one.

[Bowen Yang]

Who did that?

[Sarah Sherman]

See, I'm not threatened by that.

[Matt Rogers]

Who did this?

[Bowen Yang]

What's up with that? What's up with this?

[Matt Rogers]

Although we were talking about the scene from Mad Men. Joan confronting the man.

[Sarah Sherman]

I wouldn't care if you died.

[Matt Rogers]

That pornographic drawing.

[Bowen Yang]

Pornographic drawing. I actually. I've been watching so much Mad Men clips. The number one best scene in television history. I'm kidding you.

[Matt Rogers]

Not Joan and Don.

[Bowen Yang]

Joan and Don. It's the episode where Joan gets served with divorce papers in the office that, like, front. Front desk secretary gives, like, allows the last paper. It's the fifth season, which, by the way, has no skips. So it's the rumors of. So Don and Joan go to, like, they go to the Jaguar dealership and then, like, they pretend to be a couple, and then they go to the bar and they get a little drunk and they turn on the jukebox music, and they have this scene at the bar that talks about, like, the kind of people they are and the kind of people that are in the bar. And it's about them, but it's not. The writing and the acting is so. They're unbelievably good. Christina Hendricks. No, Emmy.

[Sarah Sherman]

That role, by the way. Like, can. I don't want to say anything disrespectful, but it's like, let's get her out there.

[Bowen Yang]

I would agree. I would definitely agree.

[Sarah Sherman]

Do you think I'm going to say something on behalf of all women?

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Is she.

[Matt Rogers]

So is she.

[Sarah Sherman]

So is she so stunningly Jessica Rabbit that people are afraid and this is just about misogyny on a larger scale. Are people afraid to give her like, challenging roles because they're like, she's so bodacious. We couldn't even.

[Matt Rogers]

I don't think it's distracting. I think it's. I think she. With Joan, I guess, like, it is so one with like the character. But I guess that sounds.

[Bowen Yang]

I think it has a lot less to do with. With that and more to do with the fact that it's almost like the reason why January Jones and Jessica Perret also don't work a ton. It's because I feel like they're very identifiable with those roles and they were so well done that maybe it counts against them sometimes.

[Sarah Sherman]

Damn. Type of cast.

[Bowen Yang]

Because I think that. I think all of those performances are unreal. I think Jessica Perret actually gets disrespectful. Was incredible.

[Matt Rogers]

Zooby Zoo is an iconic movie.

[Bowen Yang]

Zoo is the. Is in the first episode of season five and it gets better from there. Zooby Zooby Zoo is the craziest thing ever happened on television.

[Sarah Sherman]

Sure it is the craziest thing.

[Bowen Yang]

It's so insane.

[Sarah Sherman]

And then you see Twin Peaks and you go, that's okay. Some crazy things are happening here that are basically like defying all like logic between the living and the dreaming and the dead. And then you're like. And still Zooby zooby Zoo.

[Bowen Yang]

The fact that Zooby Zooby Zoo is supposed to happen in a grounded world and it still reads us being like realistic and you believe that she would do that and it says pretty much everything you need to know about her character.

[Matt Rogers]

But Zooby zooby Zoo happened on amc. Twin Peaks happened on abc.

[Bowen Yang]

Truly.

[Matt Rogers]

Which is. That's the craziest part.

[Bowen Yang]

Take that risk now challenge.

[Sarah Sherman]

You guys are actually going to lose your gourd. Basically.

[Bowen Yang]

You're going to.

[Sarah Sherman]

The. The top of your hat is going to fly off.

[Bowen Yang]

Clean off, clean off.

[Matt Rogers]

I just have no stamina when it comes to watching shit. So like I'm still on the pilot. I've been on the pilot episode of Twin Peaks for like eight years. It's so bad.

[Sarah Sherman]

That is so.

[Matt Rogers]

But, but, but I started from the beginning. Like recently, even before he passed away. Just like when the mom, like realizes that like she's got. She's dead. It's like the most devastating thing. And the Laura Palmer's theme, like the music. That score is crazy.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think once you enter episode two, then it's full lubrication and it's a non stop roller coaster.

[Matt Rogers]

Lied.

[Sarah Sherman]

Like, I don't Think you're gonn any resistance there? I think it's just like slip into that second episode. Allow it to just. It just. If the way it feels all over your body when you're watching it, it's. It's astounding. And I will say. And not to belabor this point. Belabor.

[Bowen Yang]

No, that was right.

[Matt Rogers]

That was right.

[Sarah Sherman]

I know. I just. I'm gonna be needing a PhD tonight.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, you know what? You clearly weren't paying attention in English class because you were so horned up with. You're trying to get your rocks off with Vincent Van Gogh, Vincent Van Snoop.

[Sarah Sherman]

If you saw who I was talking about, you'd go, oh, okay.

[Bowen Yang]

In a good way or in a horrified way.

[Matt Rogers]

Anytime. Sarah's like that fucking guy. Oh, what I would do. I'm like the craziest looking human being.

[Bowen Yang]

You're like the Crypt Keeper. Crypt.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

Taylor Hicks.

[Sarah Sherman]

Taylor Hicks.

[Matt Rogers]

No disrespect, Billy Bob Thornton.

[Bowen Yang]

Now keep going.

[Sarah Sherman]

And this is how, like, because I think my beautiful long suffering boyfriend is so conventionally cute cutiful that it's like. I think it's like. It's a loud. Yes, it's a counterweight.

[Matt Rogers]

Counterweight, I love that.

[Bowen Yang]

So you're so bored with traditional beauty because you get that every day. In fact, you have sex with it. In fact, if he's lucky, you're the kind of girl who holds out. This becomes like a whole other like alt right podcast. You the kind of girl who leaves it on the shelf. You know what I mean? Ew, I made that expression up. You leave it on the shelf at night.

[Matt Rogers]

On the shelf at night.

[Sarah Sherman]

You let it stink up the place.

[Bowen Yang]

You ever have to crack a window after because it stinks so mad.

[Matt Rogers]

Cause it's been on the shelf.

[Sarah Sherman]

The expiry date is.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, if you leave it on the shelf too long, you know, it starts to stink. They say that about women. They don't have sex, they start. That's when their pussy starts to really smell bad.

[Sarah Sherman]

When was the last time you smelled one me face to face?

[Bowen Yang]

I've never seen a vagina up close.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's one of the. And they cover this in many movies. It's one of the most craziest things you could see.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, how would we know? How would we know? Zoo bizoo.

[Sarah Sherman]

I didn't bring mine today. It's in the car.

[Matt Rogers]

What's your least favorite body part to depict in your art?

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, interesting. This is going to be a surprise.

[Matt Rogers]

Please.

[Sarah Sherman]

I don't like as someone who loves blood guts shit Piss boogers. I'm like, what are we, two?

[Matt Rogers]

I was gonna guess no stuff. You don't like nose?

[Sarah Sherman]

I. I love no's.

[Matt Rogers]

But you don't like booger.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think it's like we're older than that.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, that's so.

[Matt Rogers]

I love this. That there is one thing that you go, that's off. Like, I'm leaving that.

[Bowen Yang]

It's peste.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

Or it's just.

[Matt Rogers]

There's an edit there. Literally, there's an edit.

[Sarah Sherman]

There's an added cheek. And I love. I love mucoid membranes. So I love like a slick mucus.

[Bowen Yang]

Like, you don't.

[Matt Rogers]

You don't like a clump? You don't like a clump of booger?

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, again, it's like we're guys.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Really?

[Bowen Yang]

When you see someone pick your nose, are you horrified? Pick their nose, rather.

[Sarah Sherman]

No, I do this. That's part of my practice.

[Bowen Yang]

I do it too.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's. I think it's a medical procedure.

[Bowen Yang]

It's like you have to clear that out.

[Matt Rogers]

You're gonna die.

[Bowen Yang]

Sometimes it's like, it's not. It's not as easy as blowing your nose.

[Matt Rogers]

No, no, it's not.

[Sarah Sherman]

You have to get. Sometimes you have to get knuckle deep. And that's okay.

[Bowen Yang]

And again, this was really healing, actually. Thank you. Thank you for coming.

[Sarah Sherman]

You're welcome. They shouldn't make a. Oh, I was gonna say they should make a nasal bidet, but that is what a neti pot is.

[Bowen Yang]

What a neti pot is.

[Matt Rogers]

It's what a Neil Med is. You know, of course you understand.

[Sarah Sherman]

And. Oh, this was gonna be that why my. My last, like on my hands and knees, begging for you guys to watch Twin Peaks in it. In its three season arc, it posits a theory of everything spiritually, like, religiously, metaphysically, that I legitimately agree with.

[Matt Rogers]

In life, everything is love. Or love is the most important thing. What is it? Or you don't want to spoil it.

[Bowen Yang]

I think you should.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because I don't think this is spoiling necessarily.

[Bowen Yang]

Necessarily.

[Matt Rogers]

Necessarily.

[Bowen Yang]

I don't think this is necessarily spoiling anything.

[Sarah Sherman]

Necessarius.

[Bowen Yang]

But it's Necessarius. I hear Necessarius is my favorite dinosaur.

[Sarah Sherman]

That's why they got me.

[Bowen Yang]

Necessarius was so good. She was beautiful. She was cute. We have to. You guys readers, please draw Necessarius and send us in your pictures. Tag us, all three of us. And the Atlas Culturesis with your photos that you've drawn of Necessarius, but you.

[Sarah Sherman]

Have to, like, then, like, write it like, Nessa. Sarah. S A, R A. You know how to spell it necessarily.

[Matt Rogers]

Nicoleus List.

[Bowen Yang]

Monstrose. Keep going. What's the. What's the theory of everything?

[Sarah Sherman]

So, like, yes, that love is actually the greatest unifying force in the universe, but, you know, Twin Peaks is the. And I'm gonna be so serious right now that it's gonna make you laugh, okay. That it's, like, the story of, like, who killed Laura Palmer, Right. And I'm not gonna spoil the great reveal of who killed Laura Palmer for you, because that'll keep you on the hook and a half. But, like, you know, there's so much, like, pain and violence and trauma towards this, like, young high school girl and towards, like, all the women in this universe or whatever. And there's, like, great pain and trauma. And while, like, love prevails, basically, in the Great Episode 8, Season 3 of Twin Peaks, which is, like, the Return, which happened.

[Matt Rogers]

What Was that, like, 2016?

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah, 2016. Really? The Las Coltrista. You just know.

[Matt Rogers]

I don't know. I just pulled it out of my ass.

[Sarah Sherman]

You're amazing. Don't smile in.

[Matt Rogers]

Don't. Smollin, you are amazing.

[Sarah Sherman]

Thank you. Basically, he posits that true evil was unleashed into every dimension and realm of the universe when the first atomic bond atomic bomb exploded. So that a new kind of man made evil, basically fractured all of the fabric of time space, and unleashed a new form of evil in the form of Bob, who is this demon that, you know, create whatever in Twin Peaks. It unleashed a new form of evil that, like, wreaked a new form of havoc on every universe.

[Matt Rogers]

Every universe of every timeline bubble.

[Bowen Yang]

Yes.

[Sarah Sherman]

And so, like, that is the. The, like, central conflict of Twin Peaks, which is said by, you know, General Briggs when he says, you know, there's this Bobby Briggs, hottest man alive. His dad is, like, a crazy, like, military, like, general who, like, does shit with space or whatever. Oh, I'm not sounding smart. He needs a drink. Diet. Diet Coke.

[Bowen Yang]

Can you imagine if that was the answer?

[Matt Rogers]

Diet Coke.

[Bowen Yang]

We'd be geniuses.

[Sarah Sherman]

President Trump wouldn't be trying to buy Austria or whatever, is he.

[Matt Rogers]

You don't need the Diet Coke.

[Sarah Sherman]

But, like, basically he's worried. He's this, like, general who's been. Who, like, is, like, you know, in charge of investigating, like, the link between, like, American, like, military hegemony and, like, nuclear mysticism. Whatever, whatever. And he's like, my fear is that. That love is not enough. So that basically, when mankind. Emphasis on man. Basically unleashed a new kind of evil into the world when we created the nuclear bomb. He's worried that love is not enough. And then that's kind of what the return follows is all these characters that you remember from 20 years ago feeling this trauma in every dimension, in every time, space, continuum, whatever. And this is why, you know, Oppenheimer won the Oscar, and this is ultimately why. But this is what's crazy about Oppenheimer winning Get Angry.

[Bowen Yang]

Yep.

[Matt Rogers]

Come on.

[Bowen Yang]

I can feel Barbie was a better movie. Use this rage in a positive way. We all need to do that, especially now.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's more than ever.

[Bowen Yang]

Let's organize. Starting now. Use this female rage about Oppenheimer.

[Sarah Sherman]

See it. That's crazy.

[Bowen Yang]

Use your female rage against Oppenheimer to make a big, big point.

[Sarah Sherman]

Episode 8 should have won the Oscar. Say that.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know, it couldn't have been nominated for Oscar. Maybe if you were announcing the Oscars.

[Matt Rogers]

You could have just said season three, episode eight.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes, that is what I believe about the universe and like, about religion and everything is something that David lynch put in a TV show that anyone could watch.

[Matt Rogers]

That's amazing.

[Sarah Sherman]

And that's what culture is for me and for you and for you and for everybody. It's culture that's for everybody.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's not. It's not culture that you find in a little box at, like, Bucket of Blood Records in Chicago. Cool weirdo store with a bunch of.

[Bowen Yang]

You know, like, freaks, weirdos, weirdos, the outcasts, the misfits, those who haven't belonged once in their life that can find community in a place like that, in a place like this, quite frankly, this. And I don't say this in a pejorative sense. I say it in an inclusive way. Really not giving much credence to my point earlier, which shows that people can change.

[Matt Rogers]

You're saying people can change.

[Bowen Yang]

I've changed, obviously, in the last 20 minutes. Here I am using this in a beautiful, inclusive way when before I said it was usually in a dismissive way. It's just really interesting. I credit you with bringing up. Not bringing up with bringing yourself to the conversation today, period. No, I was going to keep going.

[Sarah Sherman]

It is a culture. It's not just for the queer. For once.

[Bowen Yang]

For once. The weirdos have had too good for too long.

[Sarah Sherman]

And this is what brings back to traders.

[Bowen Yang]

Lots of weirdos running around.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

A lot of queers.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes, ma'. Am.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

When you ask me, are people inherently good or evil, it can be answered in episode eight.

[Matt Rogers]

That's what an incredible Callback.

[Bowen Yang]

And the answer would that they're saying is no. People are born good.

[Matt Rogers]

People were born good. Until the. Until the nuclear.

[Bowen Yang]

The great Disruption.

[Sarah Sherman]

The Great Disruption. And it. There were so many fractures and fissures in time space that it can. That, like, this, like, demonic force can really crawl in, kind of whether or not you invite it.

[Bowen Yang]

Because we've created man made a fissure.

[Sarah Sherman]

Fissure.

[Matt Rogers]

Fissure. We're not happy that you use that word.

[Sarah Sherman]

No, because of sitting on.

[Bowen Yang]

Remaining on the toilet made our buttholes hurt when you said fissure. Have you ever told me nobody in.

[Sarah Sherman]

This room has more hemorrhoids than me?

[Bowen Yang]

Nobody in this room.

[Matt Rogers]

I feel like. It feels apocalyptic when I have one.

[Sarah Sherman]

It feel. It's a disability. I'm not kidding.

[Matt Rogers]

Can I do this? This might be a little gross. This is my. This is me on the toilet with a hemorrhoid.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, okay.

[Matt Rogers]

My.

[Bowen Yang]

This might be a little gross.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay.

[Bowen Yang]

Hey, are you jacking off? No, I'm.

[Matt Rogers]

It's hurts so much that I have to.

[Bowen Yang]

You're like, I'm Thumper. Meanwhile, you're supposed to get up. You're not supposed to be sitting there.

[Matt Rogers]

No, I'm sitting there, and I'm like, could you have.

[Sarah Sherman]

If you keep moving, then it won't, like.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

Then, like, it's a way to, like, get it out. But it's just my foot has to move. I get restless leg.

[Sarah Sherman]

I hate.

[Bowen Yang]

There's literally nothing worse than, like. Like a localized injury. It's not good.

[Matt Rogers]

Concentrated pain. Wait, was that gonna be your answer to what was the culture that made you say cultures for me?

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Bowen Yang]

And then.

[Matt Rogers]

But then you also said over text that you had opinions about housewives.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, can I. And this is my great reveal.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Bowen Yang]

Can I show you what I have?

[Sarah Sherman]

Stop.

[Bowen Yang]

Wait.

[Sarah Sherman]

Can I even guess what it is?

[Bowen Yang]

Yes.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's Heather Gay's Mormon book shirt.

[Matt Rogers]

Here we go. Ooh.

[Sarah Sherman]

Ooh.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, I feel for me too.

[Matt Rogers]

Wow. Lisa.

[Bowen Yang]

I feel for me, too.

[Sarah Sherman]

Come on. The pod. Lisa. Lisa.

[Bowen Yang]

Lisa.

[Sarah Sherman]

Barlow.

[Bowen Yang]

They really are all invited.

[Matt Rogers]

They're all invited. Truly. After all the work, the public service they did, including Brittany Bateman.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, my.

[Matt Rogers]

Give it up for Britney.

[Bowen Yang]

No, honestly. Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

Honestly. Watch when Brittany comes on the podcast and is, like, low key, funnier, and smarter than us.

[Matt Rogers]

No.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, the thing about culture is it actually started. And she tells us. She comes in, like a true cultural anthropologist, like a full 10 MBAs, talking.

[Sarah Sherman]

About, like, culture and, like, caveman time.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

She's like.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, actually, fire began when a Caveman actually. Really? It was collaborative and it was really the first collaboration.

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait, who am I actually? Abraham Lincoln had Greek Versace play.

[Bowen Yang]

Are you Angie?

[Sarah Sherman]

That was anthropology.

[Matt Rogers]

That was anthropology. Angie Katsanevis, the Queen of America.

[Bowen Yang]

Did you listen to her episode of Lost Culture?

[Sarah Sherman]

She was on Lost Cult.

[Bowen Yang]

She was the last guest before.

[Matt Rogers]

You're so stupid.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know what's so interesting? Well, I told you this and I actually don't want to say this on the podcast.

[Bowen Yang]

What edit.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm only listening to music from now on.

[Bowen Yang]

No, don't leave.

[Matt Rogers]

Leave that in.

[Bowen Yang]

Leave that in.

[Matt Rogers]

I think we would all benefit benefit from that.

[Sarah Sherman]

I just am like worried about replacing my inner chatter with outer chatter. And so I have been replacing all talking in the ears with singing.

[Matt Rogers]

Actual structured sound.

[Sarah Sherman]

You don't listen to the episode.

[Bowen Yang]

Make sure you say anything about this after for edits. Oh, to make sure that nothing slips through the cracks. Right, because this one's always spouting off some problematic stuff. Every third word. It's a big slur. Big slur. I said, listen unedited lost coach, you'll be taking a vacation. A big slur.

[Sarah Sherman]

You leave a pussy on the shelf for too long, it'll start to leak.

[Bowen Yang]

Pussy is not a slur. That doesn't count. Pussy, pussy, pussy. Come for me.

[Sarah Sherman]

My brother, when I was growing up, said to me, he said that he thought pussy was a vegetable. Cause my dad said it so much.

[Matt Rogers]

Why would he think he was a vegetable?

[Sarah Sherman]

Cause my dad would be like, get back on the field, you fucking pussy.

[Matt Rogers]

So you thought it was a vegetable?

[Bowen Yang]

Cause it was in the fields where vegetables grow, Right? Wow, am I warm.

[Sarah Sherman]

This might be Long Island Lifestyle.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, totally.

[Bowen Yang]

You'll never believe this story. So my sister comes home one day when she's five. She's had to write a book about her family. So it's like, this is my mom. I love my mom a lot. This is what my mom says to me. I love you. This is my dad. I love my dad a lot. This is what my dad says to me. It's a picture of him on the couch and it says, peanut, go grab me a beer from the fridge.

[Sarah Sherman]

Girl.

[Bowen Yang]

Hey, Peanut, go grab me a beer from the fridge.

[Sarah Sherman]

Talk about it.

[Bowen Yang]

I wrote it as a five year old and brought it back to our family and was like, this is what my mom says. This is what my dad says. Because my dad would send us into the. Into the.

[Matt Rogers]

Grab me a beer.

[Bowen Yang]

Bring it in.

[Matt Rogers]

Classic.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, you know how I just said that there's only Been one artist who has presented my theory of everything. I was wrong. It's your sister. It's not David. No.

[Bowen Yang]

There was something in there that spoke to the universe for sure. My mom says, I love you. My dad says, hey, Peanut, go grab me a beer from the fridge.

[Matt Rogers]

I can't believe I've never heard this before. That's incredible.

[Bowen Yang]

It's unbelievable. It's so good, Peanut.

[Sarah Sherman]

My dad used to be.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. Were you Peanut?

[Sarah Sherman]

I was Peanut. And also yo, sports fan.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, wow.

[Sarah Sherman]

Is that something? Yo, sport fan. Get me in. Whatever.

[Bowen Yang]

Sports fan is a lot of fun. It's a lot of fun. I was bug.

[Matt Rogers]

Bug.

[Bowen Yang]

Cause I would crawl around all the time and never sit still. Still. To this day, you know how hard it is for me to sit right here? Unbearable. I want to be crawling all over this place.

[Sarah Sherman]

Did you see you're about to be, like, bowing on the toilet?

[Bowen Yang]

Like, I want to crawl over this place. Spread my seed. I gotta come, quite frankly. Oh, I want to do it now.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh. What color would it be when it came out?

[Bowen Yang]

You don't want to know. Fine. I'll tell you. Wait. I'm a normal guy. White as snow. My cum.

[Sarah Sherman]

You guys should do a Manosphere episode.

[Bowen Yang]

All right, so now we're actually gonna come, and then we're gonna see what colors it is. All right?

[Matt Rogers]

We're gonna figure out the hex code.

[Bowen Yang]

For the cum color. So who thinks this one is Bowen's? Come.

[Sarah Sherman]

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.

[Bowen Yang]

We immediately get a huge deal with Barstool Sports. We leave iHeart.

[Matt Rogers]

We leave iHeart. We go to Barstool. For some reason on Barstool, now they're talking about Japanese pizzas. I'm like, I got a thing on my feed.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's like, what is a Japanese pizza?

[Matt Rogers]

Like, the pizza in Japan is like.

[Bowen Yang]

And talk about that.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, it's an. It's amazing pizza. That's. That's all I can say. Really?

[Bowen Yang]

That's all you can say? What? Talk about it. What is it makes it so good?

[Matt Rogers]

The dough, the sauce, the toppings.

[Sarah Sherman]

Would it be as amazing as Mary Cosby's avocado pizza looked?

[Bowen Yang]

Thoughts on Mary Cosby this year and her behavior in the finale.

[Sarah Sherman]

What can you say about a philosopher king?

[Bowen Yang]

A lot. That's actually a great point.

[Matt Rogers]

You can say a lot about a philosopher king.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, I agree with that.

[Sarah Sherman]

Like, it's cr. I get why people join the cult. She speaks with such. I just felt like she was speaking with such clarity this season that I thought that she was Channeling spirit.

[Bowen Yang]

For real. But didn't. Weren't you upset at the end when she was really trying it with Angie? She was like, I was wrong about you.

[Matt Rogers]

That was so insane.

[Bowen Yang]

It was absurd.

[Sarah Sherman]

But then she was like. Angie was like, hey. And she was like, you're right. I have abandonment issues. And it was like, great.

[Matt Rogers]

But so she needed Angie to get there, right? To get to. So Angie is the real star here.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think Angie is the star of the show.

[Bowen Yang]

Yes. I would agree.

[Sarah Sherman]

She's top five housewife for me.

[Matt Rogers]

Truly.

[Bowen Yang]

Say now. You have to say your top five.

[Sarah Sherman]

Carlton, she's crazy.

[Bowen Yang]

You need to be in an asylum.

[Matt Rogers]

The witch.

[Sarah Sherman]

Ra. Mona.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay.

[Sarah Sherman]

Singer.

[Matt Rogers]

Ra.

[Bowen Yang]

Carlton.

[Matt Rogers]

Singer.

[Bowen Yang]

Angie.

[Matt Rogers]

Angie.

[Sarah Sherman]

Angie.

[Bowen Yang]

Okay, who is rounding out this five?

[Sarah Sherman]

Karen.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

That can't be my five.

[Matt Rogers]

Karen.

[Bowen Yang]

You didn't say a fifth one more.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, fuck. Hold on. You don't even have it on my phone. I feel like I wrote it on my phone.

[Bowen Yang]

It's like, there's a fold. There's a folder with drag names. There's a folder with my favorite housewives.

[Sarah Sherman]

My favorite karaoke songs.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay. This is a nice spread. You have. You have Roni, Beverly Hills, Potomac, Salt Lake. You're missing what I want.

[Bowen Yang]

You need a Miami in there. You need Adriana in. Yeah, you know what?

[Sarah Sherman]

I actually. Marisol's mom.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, yeah. Elsa.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah. Wait, so what? Carlton. Ramona. Actually. Mary Cosby. Angie.

[Bowen Yang]

Wow.

[Sarah Sherman]

And then no.

[Matt Rogers]

Karen. Elsa.

[Bowen Yang]

Not.

[Matt Rogers]

Not even.

[Bowen Yang]

Even the. This week. You're gonna knock Karen out?

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah. Throw her back in there? Cause does it count? Does the body cam footage count as an episode of Housewives?

[Bowen Yang]

I think so. I think it's canon, because that is just, like.

[Matt Rogers]

It's so sad.

[Bowen Yang]

So when she's sitting in the jail cell getting interrogated, and she just has. She's babbling, and then she goes, Thomas Jefferson's concubine.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's just like, you don't get that kind of genius anywhere else in this world.

[Matt Rogers]

She is one of the funniest people.

[Sarah Sherman]

To ever love that. Talk about channeling the muse in the room. Like, be in the room where that happens.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Like, that is a top five.

[Bowen Yang]

You stand in my top five or. Oh, God, sure.

[Matt Rogers]

Well, can we just point out stereo standing out of Karen's body cam footage.

[Bowen Yang]

And Britney B. Oh, my top five is Britney Baitman. No, just kidding.

[Sarah Sherman]

I would respect. I would respect that immensely.

[Bowen Yang]

I do think she's had a wild, incredible season.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes.

[Bowen Yang]

Like, this is. It is funny, fun.

[Matt Rogers]

The Jared.

[Sarah Sherman]

You guys, I've never Recorded in my life.

[Bowen Yang]

I was trying to send a video to my daughter. She got a good grade on her math test. She just started speaking to me again.

[Matt Rogers]

You guys.

[Sarah Sherman]

You guys have an announcement.

[Bowen Yang]

My daughter's speaking to me. What?

[Sarah Sherman]

This is the part where I don't want you.

[Bowen Yang]

Would you Singing Pink Pony Club throughout the airport.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's amazing.

[Bowen Yang]

It's brilliant. To all housewives, past, future, past future and present. Take notes.

[Sarah Sherman]

Like, this is what happens when you're off your phone. So we're actually referring to someone who literally just made a TikTok. But, like, when you're off your phone and just being. Being you and you're not, like, worried about how people perceive you.

[Matt Rogers]

No podcast, no outer chatter in your inner chat.

[Bowen Yang]

When you're off your phone and just being you, it's incredible what you can do on your phone. That's essentially what you just said when you really clear that. When you just let the music speak and you just put away your phone. Pick up your phone, see what happens. Amazing shit. The content, especially now in the new era of TikTok Baby and Outcast and.

[Sarah Sherman]

Vagabonds and Dragulators, it's like. It's like. That is like. There are so many people are trying to manufacture Housewife dumb.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes.

[Sarah Sherman]

And they're trying to.

[Bowen Yang]

Ron. I don't think Bronwyn is as guilty of that as other. I mean, let's call a spade a spade.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Bowen Yang]

My critique for the finale of Salt Lake, I did not need them to do that. Stupid.

[Matt Rogers]

That game was made.

[Bowen Yang]

That game was so.

[Matt Rogers]

So Heather is. We'll put Heather.

[Bowen Yang]

I don't think she even believed. Believed in it. I think. I think they told her, like, to do this, and then she was like, yeah, fine. And then it just. Not one element of the show felt like they were pushing that hard for drama until that moment. And I was just like, I just don't believe this.

[Matt Rogers]

It tripped at the finish line a little bit.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think it's like we're at a point with Housewives where push has come to shove, and it's like, in order for anything to be. I think New York is evidence of this. If it's just like. It just has to be crazy. And that's why I think I do respect Heather doing that because she's like, well, it's the finale episode. We're all sitting at the table, and it has to be insane because what.

[Bowen Yang]

Was my favorite was her cadence. We're gonna take out our phones. We're gonna find the worst thing we've ever said about someone here. And then we're gonna hand over our phone and we're gonna read it diabolically and we're gonna move forward.

[Sarah Sherman]

Do you think she scripted. She scripted that?

[Bowen Yang]

No, I don't.

[Sarah Sherman]

You don't think she had a notes app on her phone that was like, God, guys.

[Matt Rogers]

What I find suspicious was that they all like, remember when Lisa like, zoomed the fuck in?

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

And like, was like swiping, swiping, swiping. So it's like they screenshot. They had text at the ready. I think that was prepared. There was something produced.

[Bowen Yang]

It was very produced. It was very. It was the only moment of the season that I felt was like, inorganic.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

And I didn't like it.

[Sarah Sherman]

I. I did like it because I just felt like Heather was like, I have. I. I left not a single crumb last season.

[Bowen Yang]

No. And she's just like, she actually deserves an Emmy.

[Sarah Sherman]

She does.

[Matt Rogers]

She does. She does.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because she wrote that and. And it's like she was like, the way I tore that last year, like, the only way I can one up myself is if I do the craziest thing possible, which is she did the craziest thing possible.

[Matt Rogers]

There was a moment there where the language was even kind of like mirroring last season where she goes. We're all obsessed with. With receipts. We're all obsessed with proof. Like, like, she's caught herself mid list being like, oh, I gotta change up the. Yeah, the words a little bit. But it was receipts proof, timeline.

[Bowen Yang]

I actually, like, earlier in the year, like in our group chat, people were like, oh, Heather's not having a great season. She's not like in it. I'm like, actually, I totally disagree because I think Heather Gay is the audience.

[Matt Rogers]

Yep.

[Bowen Yang]

And she's the best narrator on the show. And she's the lead of the show. She's the protagonist. So it's fine by me that she's not like, totally like racked with whatever is going on. I feel like she's had a lot of that and I kind of enjoy watching her watch what's happening. That's how I feel about Ms. Gay.

[Sarah Sherman]

Ms. Gay.

[Bowen Yang]

I was talking about you. I wasn't talking about her. That's how I feel about everyone.

[Sarah Sherman]

As everyone knows my straight power fist.

[Bowen Yang]

Wow. Even this week.

[Matt Rogers]

Limp wristed somehow.

[Bowen Yang]

Even this week.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, the ymca. Him dancing to the YMCA is like, is Brittany Bateman level? It's like, totally. We're.

[Bowen Yang]

We are giving a standing O to the Village People.

[Matt Rogers]

Tore this.

[Sarah Sherman]

You tore this.

[Matt Rogers]

And you know this to be true.

[Sarah Sherman]

But, like, if Britney, Brittany Bateman, they're. They're a perfect cast because they're every archetype.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah. Of housewife, and they're themselves.

[Sarah Sherman]

But Heather Gay is not. And that is what Mary was saying to Mary when Mary was like, heather, you've changed, and you're not. You know, you're not yourself. She's like, you are becoming too aware and too into the fandom and, like, you're Rihanna's favorite, and you're performing and you're producing, but Heather, like, kind of. Of needs to do that a little bit.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. I think it's unfair. I think. I think you need. You do need Heather to do what Heather has done.

[Sarah Sherman]

Right. Because you. Because you have Brittany Bateman. Like, if everyone was, Brittany Bateman would be unwatched.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, the rest of them are not capable of doing that. Like, Lisa Barlow is not capable. And I'm wearing her on my shirt. I have deep respect over my heart. She's not capable of being like, hey, guys, to the producers. What do you guys need? Let me execute that for you. One.

[Matt Rogers]

One person can do that in the cast, besides Heather, which is Angie.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, you think?

[Matt Rogers]

I think.

[Bowen Yang]

I think Angie's a cat. I think Angie, too, is a chaos.

[Sarah Sherman]

Agent, and she's living. She's truthfully living her life as the. The wife of a beautiful game.

[Bowen Yang]

She's more grounded.

[Matt Rogers]

But Angie can, like, zoom out and, like, the way she handled the Mary thing, I'm like, she can. She can do this. She's so aware in the best and in the exact right way.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. She has an understanding of that. Of the situations in a way where she's like, you know, when it's time to put your foot on the gas and like, whenever it's Meredith spinning in a circle at her own bat mitzvah, being like, sakai. Like, Angie knows. Like, I'm upset, but this is good. Meanwhile, it's like Mary melting down. Like, there's a bone in every Housewives body that if they were to scratch that bone, it would just be like, let me continue fighting this woman. But Angie knew it's. It is not. I'm not arguing with Mary Cosby about this.

[Matt Rogers]

Right.

[Sarah Sherman]

Saying high body count hair. It's like, I actually take back what I said about Ms. Gay needing an Emmy for her writing. It is Angie. Because we're getting lines like, high body count hair, and we're getting lines like. Like, one foot in the grave and another one.

[Matt Rogers]

And then she. And then she even wrote something for this show where I don't think so honey was. I don't think so. Any high body kind of hair. And then she goes, if you come to lunatic Fringe Salon, by the way, the name.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, no.

[Matt Rogers]

When we.

[Bowen Yang]

First of all, when we saw that, I didn't know it was called Lunatic fringe.

[Sarah Sherman]

Triangle hair vibes.

[Bowen Yang]

Lunatic fringe. I saw.

[Matt Rogers]

I saw Saron.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, then I. I didn't know that it was actually a phrase like the lunatic fringe references actually like groups of people. It's not just two words that sound great together.

[Matt Rogers]

She's like a full Sarah Norman genius. I worship this.

[Sarah Sherman]

The text.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, we do. And she was great on the show. You should listen to that.

[Sarah Sherman]

She also, like. She looks perfect.

[Matt Rogers]

This is the right. The joke level writing.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. Yeah, this is good.

[Matt Rogers]

She goes, come to Ludici cringe. You have a get lid guarantee. If you don't have sex, come back, I'll fuck you myself, girl. Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Then they say they. Rome was not built in a day.

[Bowen Yang]

No.

[Matt Rogers]

What can you possibly mean by that?

[Bowen Yang]

And you're talking about a Greek woman, so watch it. So don't stop with this Rome imagery. We're talking about a Greek legend built a.

[Sarah Sherman]

A hair empire.

[Matt Rogers]

Really?

[Sarah Sherman]

Because she was laying brick by brick.

[Matt Rogers]

In the cultural wasteland of Salty city.

[Sarah Sherman]

Get City. It is, by the way, it is a goddamn pillar.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm a pillar of the community. Oh, my God. Do I have an Angie? Lauren.

[Sarah Sherman]

Go, go, go. Do, do.

[Matt Rogers]

Meredith.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, Meredith, I thought it was really interesting how you attacked me and you were very rude to me. There's not much. I'm specific. I have to work on it.

[Matt Rogers]

It's there.

[Bowen Yang]

Hilling Journey. I'm in a real place of hilling.

[Sarah Sherman]

I love her. I love her.

[Bowen Yang]

I want. She needs to have a better season next year. And I actually blame the. I think the producers cut out a lot of her shit.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, interesting.

[Matt Rogers]

Because, like, we love Whitney.

[Bowen Yang]

I love her.

[Sarah Sherman]

I think she's the most stunning woman alive, period.

[Bowen Yang]

One of the only housewives I've done a shot with.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh.

[Sarah Sherman]

And how did that present itself?

[Bowen Yang]

Well, we were both at High Tops West Hollywood.

[Sarah Sherman]

Good for her.

[Bowen Yang]

Likely place for us to be.

[Sarah Sherman]

She is a gay guy.

[Matt Rogers]

She's a gay guy. She is.

[Bowen Yang]

She's a gay guy. She's not as much of a gay guy as Angie K. Oh, sure.

[Matt Rogers]

Well, but when. When. When Sudi and I were at Shucked, she was in the audience and then Sudi was like, say hi to her. I was like, I'm too shy.

[Bowen Yang]

Bowen. But this is Bowen Is so you guys work with the biggest A Listers week in and week out.

[Sarah Sherman]

These are our A list.

[Bowen Yang]

Meredith Marks came to the Fire island premiere years ago with Seth and Brooks. I. I went over to her to. That was the first time we had ever met. I said, bowen, come over here. He said, no, I'm not doing that.

[Sarah Sherman]

No, it's.

[Bowen Yang]

He's like. He was too scared.

[Sarah Sherman]

I get that.

[Matt Rogers]

I love these people with all my heart.

[Sarah Sherman]

And her scratched cornea really concerned me.

[Bowen Yang]

Meredith doesn't stop creating content.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm saying this is someone who will be buying her. What is it? Pink microphones that she's selling.

[Bowen Yang]

If you don't think I have the entire Meredith Marks collection and have been to the store in park, you're incorrect.

[Matt Rogers]

What are the paint?

[Bowen Yang]

You'd be deeply mistaken.

[Sarah Sherman]

Okay, do you remember at the end when it was like during the finale when they put the title cards up like what they're doing now and they came by so fast. Listen, we're all professional readers. Could not read that.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, I love reading.

[Matt Rogers]

Fluent in language.

[Bowen Yang]

I love reading quick.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, love.

[Bowen Yang]

So good at it.

[Sarah Sherman]

This is my first language.

[Bowen Yang]

What if your WI fi wasn't just WI Fi, but the magic holding your whole holiday together?

[Matt Rogers]

Well, with Xfinity WI Fi, it kind of is.

[Bowen Yang]

Picture this. Powered by their best, most elite high performing tech, this WI Fi doesn't just connect devices. It keeps the peace at home during the most wonderful and most stressful time of the year.

[Matt Rogers]

It's kind of like having a little holiday helper working behind the scenes, making sure the holiday playlist never skips the beat and the video call with grandma doesn't freeze mid cookie tutorial.

[Bowen Yang]

It's WI Fi that keeps your whole home connected so you can actually enjoy the holiday magic chaos free. The best present of all.

[Matt Rogers]

Let me paint a picture for you. A holiday movie marathon is streaming in the living room. Your kid is video chatting their friends from their tablet and your partner is shopping for too many gifts and cinnamon candles.

[Bowen Yang]

Ugh.

[Matt Rogers]

Not this season. Not with Xfinity WiFi.

[Bowen Yang]

With Xfinity you can boost the Wi Fi to your device only. So when you go to upload 200 photos of that cat in a cute little Santa hat, you won't see that dreaded failed to upload message. Not this season. Not with Xfinity WI Fi. And what if you had a way to make sure family time during the holidays had zero distractions? With Xfinity WI Fi you can pause the kids WI Fi and enjoy those special moments together.

[Matt Rogers]

And if you're wondering what other parental instincts your WI Fi has during this busy season, Xfinity protects your kids when they're online, so you know they're safe, even if you're busy making cocoa or taste testing cookies.

[Bowen Yang]

What? Someone has to make sure there's exactly the same amount of chocolate chips in each cookie. And what if your WI Fi could proactively fix issues before they even happen? Well, that's exactly what Xfinity WI Fi does. Like the friend who shows up with extra wrapping paper, bows and tape before you even realize you're out. Because, let's be honest, you never buy enough.

[Matt Rogers]

Bottom line, Xfinity WiFi isn't just smart, it's brilliant. And during the holidays, that brilliance, That's a gift. Xfinity. Imagine that you ever just stop in.

[Bowen Yang]

The middle of a crazy day and realize, wow, I needed a break.

[Matt Rogers]

It literally happened to me yesterday. I cracked open a Diet Coke, sat back for five minutes. Total reset.

[Bowen Yang]

Right? There's something about the crispy, refreshing taste of an ice cold Diet Coke. It just hits.

[Matt Rogers]

It's my little me moment. Like, make time for a Diet Coke break, you know?

[Bowen Yang]

Exactly. Diet Coke is the perfect companion for all break moments. Diet Coke. This is my taste. Two questions. What are you doing right now? And why aren't you on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise?

[Matt Rogers]

Well, obviously you were listening to us. Smart use of your time.

[Bowen Yang]

True. But you could also be on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise at the same time. That's just brilliant time management.

[Matt Rogers]

Very true. This gives me an idea. Let's do a quick cruise quiz. Ready? First cruise. Dining. Do you prefer a buffet or a curated dining experience with access to 20 distinct restaurants?

[Bowen Yang]

Curated dining. Next.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay, good choice. That's what Virgin Voyages offers. Second question. Would you rather have an overstuffed itinerary or the freedom to explore stunning.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, I want the freedom to explore stunning Caribbean destinations. Again. I think I see where this quiz is going. Virgin Voyages is amazing.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, Absolutely. The cruises are kid free. From sunrise yoga to late night cocktails, every moment is made for grown up fun.

[Bowen Yang]

Nothing against kids. Kids are awesome. But sometimes it's nice to be kid free.

[Matt Rogers]

And there's so much included value. Over $1,000.

[Bowen Yang]

Over $1,000 of awesomeness. All included. Wi Fi soda, top tier entertainment, over 20 restaurants, and even group fitness class classes. No hidden fees, no surprise charges. Virgin Voyages gives you the kind of luxury you actually deserve.

[Sarah Sherman]

And you know what?

[Matt Rogers]

I deserve luxury.

[Bowen Yang]

You do? And me too. Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

There's always something happening on board. From wellness focused Sailings to epic holiday voyages, live music, DJs, themed parties and more. Boredom doesn't board the ship.

[Bowen Yang]

And there are so many amazing stops. You leave from Miami and sail to places like Grand Cayman, Jamaica, Puerto Rico and the Dominican Republic. Virgin even has their own private beach club in Bimini. And they're adding stops in 2025 and 2026.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, like Aruba, St. Lucia and Curacao.

[Bowen Yang]

But it's not all go, go, go, Right?

[Matt Rogers]

You can totally go into relaxation mode too. Your cabin is a full on sanctuary, private terrace, ocean views and their signature red hammock just waiting for you to swing.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, and did I mention Virgin Voyages is launching a new ship. The brilliant lady. Brilliant name, by the way. She's bigger, bolder, and packed with even more Virgin wow factors.

[Matt Rogers]

Book [e-mail] or contact your travel advisor.

[Bowen Yang]

That's virginvoyages.com.

[Matt Rogers]

Do you know what the perfect thing to bring to any event is? Any dinner, any little party, any occasion. Formal, casual, you name it.

[Bowen Yang]

What's that?

[Matt Rogers]

Casamigos.

[Bowen Yang]

Wow, that really is chic.

[Matt Rogers]

Right? There's nothing like having Casamigos at a party with your friends.

[Bowen Yang]

That makes sense seeing as Casamigos whole vibe is friendship. It's literally in the name.

[Matt Rogers]

I didn't realize that. Well, the vibe is working because everyone loves it. It's good with anything. Watermelon juice, Bloody Mary mix, coconut, grapefruit, diet freaking cola. Crying out loud.

[Bowen Yang]

The deepest friendships have been forged over Casamigos margaritas.

[Matt Rogers]

Casamigos margarita. Now that's a slay.

[Bowen Yang]

Now Casamigos, anything is a slay.

[Matt Rogers]

Anything goes with my Casamigos.

[Bowen Yang]

That is so true.

[Matt Rogers]

You can thank me later. Please drink responsibly. Imported by Casamigo Spirits Company, White Plains, New York. Cas amigos tequila. 40% alcohol by volume. Top five housewives. Should we do it?

[Bowen Yang]

What are yours?

[Matt Rogers]

Stacy Rush.

[Sarah Sherman]

You are crazy.

[Matt Rogers]

I watch her QVC videos.

[Bowen Yang]

He does. It's like asmr.

[Matt Rogers]

It's ASMR to me. They're so soothing.

[Sarah Sherman]

Jesus bracelet.

[Matt Rogers]

And as a proud Christian woman, I.

[Bowen Yang]

Love having God right here on my wrist. As a proud Christian woman.

[Matt Rogers]

She is. No, she is actually a revolutionary housewife. Because she is showing you that you can be a positive, loving person and still succeed.

[Sarah Sherman]

And you could have the most beautiful boobs on tv.

[Matt Rogers]

And you are the most gorgeously stacked person to ever be on television. Her body is. Is insane. Body.

[Bowen Yang]

Teeth.

[Sarah Sherman]

Her body is. Her body is D. Her body is Celsius. Her body is dying.

[Matt Rogers]

Look at that. I mean, Becca, that's the most gorgeous woman alive.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. And to think she's dating a man who will not have sex.

[Matt Rogers]

That's crazy. No.

[Bowen Yang]

And that.

[Matt Rogers]

That's part of what.

[Sarah Sherman]

What is going on there with Miss.

[Bowen Yang]

Let me think about it. Let me think about it for even more than one or two seconds.

[Matt Rogers]

Ms. Gay.

[Bowen Yang]

I think. I think.

[Matt Rogers]

But we love Stacey. I love Stacey. Rushes in my top five.

[Sarah Sherman]

Listen, I'm never gonna shame an actor who wants camera time.

[Matt Rogers]

Sure.

[Bowen Yang]

And you're. And you are never gonna do that. You respect the fuck out of those guys. I respect the fuck out of those guys. Any actor out here who's grinding, doing their best, putting one foot in front of the other in this grind we call Hollywood. I respect the out of those guys. Excuse my language, but it's true. And it's really difficult.

[Sarah Sherman]

Don't say it for the hard of hearing. Meredith Marxist. People in the back.

[Matt Rogers]

Whoa.

[Bowen Yang]

I thought you just said Meredith Marxist. And I thought, that's a good drag name.

[Matt Rogers]

That's a great drag name. Meredith Marxist. Marxist. Oh, my God. IPhone list.

[Bowen Yang]

Meredith Marx. Wait, can I just say, when I.

[Matt Rogers]

Was in college, when I was in Denver for the holidays, it was this huge event all over Grindr, people were like, we're going to Meredith Marks. Meredith Marks is going to show up at Tracks, this nightclub by the train. Tracks.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

It was like the entire town was getting ready for, like, a presidential visit.

[Bowen Yang]

An A List Tracks appearance.

[Matt Rogers]

No, of course. And I was like, I am not. I'm gonna sit this one out.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because of fear.

[Matt Rogers]

Because of fear. No, but we love Meredith.

[Bowen Yang]

Meredith came, obviously. Meredith famously, as the readers know, came to the Culture Awards and delivered a great, great performance and accepted an award in person on behalf of all the ladies, and then came out to the after party afterwards and was hanging out.

[Matt Rogers]

She is a good hand.

[Sarah Sherman]

This is what I was saying about the. The title. When it said at the end of the title cards, it said that she's coming out with listening pink listening devices.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, well, she's got a handicap microphone. She's a handicapped woman.

[Sarah Sherman]

But because Brit, she thought, oh, so.

[Bowen Yang]

We'Re making fun of the differently abled. I understand you make fun of disability buddies now. My family on.

[Matt Rogers]

On a really underappreciated line during the whole, like, recording freak out in the sprinter van. What is it?

[Bowen Yang]

I invited you into my home. No, that. And then she's been saying lies and spreading lies. She goes for saying lies and spreading lies. Like saying and spreading being two different things. For saying lies and Spreading lies. She rules. Absolutely rocks.

[Matt Rogers]

She rocks.

[Sarah Sherman]

Garbage. Horror posts.

[Matt Rogers]

Meredith. Stacy.

[Sarah Sherman]

I just.

[Matt Rogers]

Luanne. And then I'm gonna say I. Fucking Luanne.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, fuck, I forgot.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, no, we can.

[Sarah Sherman]

Luanne and Sonia. Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

We can share the list. Charay.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, Charay Whitfield.

[Sarah Sherman]

This is. This is the list.

[Matt Rogers]

And I'm gonna say. I'm gonna say Alexia.

[Bowen Yang]

Alexia is pretty good.

[Matt Rogers]

Alexia. Alexia is huge for me.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm gonna say Adriana tomorrow.

[Sarah Sherman]

Okay. Amazing.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm gonna say Meredith.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm gonna say. If you say Meredith, I'm gonna say Dolores. Catania.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, you love Dolores.

[Bowen Yang]

And I'm gonna say. Who do I laugh at?

[Sarah Sherman]

Sonia. Like, how is Sonia nominated?

[Bowen Yang]

Honestly, Sonia to me is diminishing.

[Matt Rogers]

Return Kenya.

[Sarah Sherman]

Sure.

[Bowen Yang]

Kenya is tough for me because as incredibly fabulous as she is, I don't think I'm like. Like, chuckling and laughing along. Honestly. In. In good times. Porsche.

[Matt Rogers]

I was going to say Porsche. You like Porsche?

[Bowen Yang]

Porsche's unbelievable. And also, you know who I think is actually a top five housewife. And I take the good and the bad.

[Sarah Sherman]

Nene.

[Bowen Yang]

Erica James.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, sure. Totally.

[Bowen Yang]

Erica Jane is unforgettable character on television.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah. And it's like, if we're like, paying homage to what the shit. Homage for the zooby zoos in the room. That's. It's like. That is what the show is. It's a soap opera. And she is a soap opera character.

[Bowen Yang]

I mean, literally named after Erica Kane.

[Matt Rogers]

Wow.

[Sarah Sherman]

My soul left my body.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. You met her.

[Matt Rogers]

No, wait. I don't know who area Kane is.

[Sarah Sherman]

I did General Hospital.

[Matt Rogers]

Right.

[Bowen Yang]

Erica Kane is Susan Lucci's character on All My Children and All My Children, the most famous soap opera character.

[Matt Rogers]

And it was.

[Bowen Yang]

And.

[Matt Rogers]

But Sarah was on General Hospital.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Bowen Yang]

Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

That is the most iconic thing anyone's.

[Sarah Sherman]

Ever done well and talk about.

[Bowen Yang]

You were on General Hospital.

[Sarah Sherman]

I didn't know this. I bet. I literally. I said, hey. I. Hey, please. And they were like, are you, like, kidding? Because you're a comedian. Are you kidding? And I was like, I'm 1 million.

[Bowen Yang]

What did you do on General Hospital?

[Sarah Sherman]

They were like. So they.

[Matt Rogers]

She's a speech. She's a speech therapist.

[Bowen Yang]

Therapist are kidding me.

[Matt Rogers]

She's amazing.

[Sarah Sherman]

I come in for one episode, can't do a serious face going. Because, you know, it is true what they say on. So like that in soap operas, you know, at the end of a scene, it holds on everyone's facial reaction.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. Like this. And I. I really do want to.

[Matt Rogers]

Go beyond you'd be amazing.

[Bowen Yang]

All I want to do is act.

[Sarah Sherman]

And guess what they do Hundred pages of dialogue a fucking day. Do your respect speech. Put respect on that with the soap opera actors. What were you saying with respect that you just did earlier?

[Bowen Yang]

I respect the hell out of that.

[Sarah Sherman]

I respect the hell out of those actress.

[Bowen Yang]

You know, it's. It's. Think about how many greats we've got from soaps. Julianne Moore.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, Lisa.

[Bowen Yang]

Rinna Tali Ripa.

[Sarah Sherman]

I did when I hosted my game show. My hamster game show. My.

[Bowen Yang]

Let that sink in. You don't even know the half of.

[Matt Rogers]

It with this hamster game show. Let's keep going.

[Bowen Yang]

Who was competing? The hamsters.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes, they were just. Yes, they were.

[Matt Rogers]

But the humans too.

[Bowen Yang]

All right, Well, I would imagine.

[Matt Rogers]

And there. And there. Therein lies the. The rug.

[Sarah Sherman]

I was. My co host, Kyle. Shout out.

[Matt Rogers]

Shout out.

[Sarah Sherman]

He did soap operas and he was like, you have no idea. Idea the level of acting talent. He said that all of his co stars could. When they were like, hey, you know, the director would be like, can we get one single tear rolling down your cheek? They would go, which eye?

[Bowen Yang]

Which eye?

[Sarah Sherman]

Which eye? Yeah, you could do that, though. You could. Which I. You could.

[Matt Rogers]

I certainly could.

[Bowen Yang]

Which I.

[Sarah Sherman]

So at the end of every scene, like, they literally do the whole, like, hold for reaction. Hold for reaction. But my crunchy ass literally doing this in my reaction shots. They're fucking amazing. I couldn't believe. Everyone is so amazing at acting in General Hospital. It's like in.

[Bowen Yang]

Okay, you know what? I'm throwing it out there. I want to be on General Hospital. Easy. I'm serious. I would love to come in and do whatever you guys need.

[Matt Rogers]

They're not gonna want to let you go.

[Bowen Yang]

That's fine. I would. I'll do a recurring role, period. I would love to.

[Sarah Sherman]

It is like one take. Everyone done. Everyone's off book, day of, day of. They get the script and then they go, got it.

[Matt Rogers]

Wow.

[Sarah Sherman]

And I've legit. Never been more nervous in my life. Because you're actually with pros who are like, they do this every. Yeah, yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

I'm sorry, I don't mean to make this about me. I want to put something out there.

[Bowen Yang]

What?

[Matt Rogers]

I want to do a pro wrestling thing.

[Bowen Yang]

That would be really good.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

I went to.

[Bowen Yang]

I went.

[Matt Rogers]

I went to New Japan. New Japan Pro wrestling at the Tokyo Dome. It was the most amazing thing I've ever seen in my life. From children to elderly women screaming.

[Sarah Sherman]

Hilarious.

[Matt Rogers]

Hilarious.

[Sarah Sherman]

Acrobatic.

[Bowen Yang]

I just Fabulous.

[Matt Rogers]

It's all my favorite things costume.

[Bowen Yang]

Ask John Cena for 10.

[Matt Rogers]

John. John Mandarin speaker John Cena. Yeah. Have you seen him do the ads for La Gonma?

[Sarah Sherman]

I guess not.

[Matt Rogers]

For the Chili Crisp. Cam knows.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, for the Chili Crisp.

[Matt Rogers]

He's in his trailer. He's like, it's crazy good.

[Sarah Sherman]

Okay, so for those reading, listening, watching, Matt wants to be on General Hospital. Badly done. Bowen General Hospital done. What substance?

[Bowen Yang]

Like, hey, Substance two.

[Matt Rogers]

Substance two.

[Bowen Yang]

You find out Monstro is not dead. Monstrosity slurps up and it's you. I mean, and then you have to go into SNL and it's meta. Oh, my God.

[Sarah Sherman]

And then Montreal has to work at Starbucks, and she's just got to be a girl. Getting her together in West Hollywood and, like, roommates.

[Bowen Yang]

How did I want you to. Could you possibly conjure up how you felt when you saw Monstro? Alyssa Sue. And when the text came on the screen that said Monstro, Alyssa Su. Like, how did you feel?

[Sarah Sherman]

You're going to, like, think I'm. I'm joshing around or kyling around or whatever you're going to say, but, like, so I want. I went to the movie with my friend Aris, who, like, does, like, a Who.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm sorry, how do you spell the.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, wow.

[Bowen Yang]

If his name was Eris, he's had a hard two years.

[Matt Rogers]

But, like the Final Fantasy character. Anyway, keep going.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes. My friend Eris, who does practical effects, who did all the practical effects, and Sarah, Maxine.

[Matt Rogers]

We went vaccine.

[Sarah Sherman]

We went together, and when that happened, legit stood up.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The more you do it, the laugh.

[Sarah Sherman]

And we were like. Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

Like, literally. Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because I. I didn't think people in the theater we saw it with were, like, screaming, laughing the whole time, but I don't think they. They did. They. They didn't feel like they had permission to stand and.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, cheer.

[Sarah Sherman]

But it's cheer.

[Bowen Yang]

It's cheering.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's cheering.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. Monstro. Elissa Sue.

[Matt Rogers]

I think multiple. Because I saw it from. I saw. I saw it at home and I kept. And mind you, I was stoned. But it was the perfect way to watch it because I kept turning to Matt. It's okay. I kept turning to Matt.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, wait. Holding space.

[Matt Rogers]

I turned to Matt and I was like.

[Bowen Yang]

I flatline. I. I slowly stop, and I'm just.

[Sarah Sherman]

No, wait, give me something. And now this is a circuit.

[Bowen Yang]

We did say we couldn't do holding space jokes anymore.

[Matt Rogers]

For Sarah.

[Sarah Sherman]

We can, right?

[Bowen Yang]

This is the last time. Only for you. You're a Little Rascal.

[Sarah Sherman]

So this is like. You know what I mean? It's different.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

I kept saying to Matt, I was like, this is.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, he did minutes in. He was like, this is the best movie ever.

[Matt Rogers]

I was like, this rules. I love that movie.

[Bowen Yang]

And I love Demi.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, I loved me.

[Sarah Sherman]

She's the most beautiful woman who's ever grace the planet.

[Matt Rogers]

62. Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Can you believe that's crazy?

[Bowen Yang]

Yep.

[Sarah Sherman]

How old is anyone?

[Matt Rogers]

I don't know.

[Bowen Yang]

You'd have to ask them.

[Matt Rogers]

And it's rude. In some cultures. Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

In some cultures, that's rude.

[Sarah Sherman]

Do you want to hear say, I'm bouncing around? I'm so crazy. But I was like. It just scared me to think that we wouldn't be bringing this up. My neighbor. Wait, this is so back. This is not what we're talking about.

[Matt Rogers]

No, say it. Say it.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm not. No, I'm flatlining.

[Matt Rogers]

No, say it. Say it.

[Bowen Yang]

What?

[Sarah Sherman]

But my neighbor is a brain scientist.

[Bowen Yang]

I don't think that's what they're called. Neighbor, hack neighbor.

[Sarah Sherman]

Legit. Sometimes I am kind of like, should I knock on her door and ask her if it's normal that I can feel the veins in my eyes?

[Matt Rogers]

Knock, knock, knock.

[Bowen Yang]

Hey.

[Sarah Sherman]

Hi.

[Bowen Yang]

How are you?

[Sarah Sherman]

Not me getting an aura ring and refreshing the lap every five seconds.

[Bowen Yang]

I had a question about. I know you're off the clock. I can feel the veins in my eyes.

[Sarah Sherman]

Is this normal?

[Matt Rogers]

Which is not the brain.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. No, no, I'm not seeing the brain, but everything is.

[Sarah Sherman]

Everything is. Because actually, isn't all of reality, especially.

[Bowen Yang]

Roller culture number 94, it's not the brain, but everything is. We've never had a rule, like, negate itself.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well. Well, all I'm saying is that all of reality is consciousness. So period. Period.

[Bowen Yang]

Wait, can you walk through that?

[Sarah Sherman]

It's just like, we could all be, like, literally in my dream right now.

[Bowen Yang]

So you're an egomaniac narcissist.

[Matt Rogers]

So you're a solipsist.

[Bowen Yang]

Sorry.

[Sarah Sherman]

We could all be in, like, Trump's dream.

[Bowen Yang]

That you threw it on him.

[Matt Rogers]

It's his day.

[Bowen Yang]

It is. What? This is all his dream, isn't it?

[Sarah Sherman]

It's like, I just. I'm sorry. I can't get over that he had fucking ymca.

[Bowen Yang]

You have to watch the Apprentice.

[Matt Rogers]

The movie?

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, wait, no, the movie. The movie with Sebastian. I love the Apprentice of the TV show. So does Bo Nang. I loved it. Well, back in the day, I liked it, too.

[Matt Rogers]

It was the best show.

[Bowen Yang]

I did like the Apprentice. Back in the day when it was all fun and games.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm talking. Talking about the Apprentice 2024 with Sebastian Stan and Jeremy Strong, essentially the Apprentice, referring to the fact that Trump was Roy Apprentice.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know, I pledged to watch that.

[Bowen Yang]

It's really an interesting movie.

[Sarah Sherman]

And did it get like a little bit where people worried about it?

[Bowen Yang]

Yes, still worried about it. Why?

[Matt Rogers]

Sebastian Stan's Oscars. I'm sorry. Golden Globes pictures like, we cannot move in fear. Is this leaf distracting?

[Bowen Yang]

No. Are you sure you're okay with it?

[Sarah Sherman]

It's.

[Matt Rogers]

There is rustling afoot.

[Bowen Yang]

I mean, certainly. Okay, but. And I just feel like if I were to have a leaf on my head throughout the entirety, I'm doing my job.

[Matt Rogers]

Well, good thing.

[Bowen Yang]

Or not crazy that this is actually our job.

[Matt Rogers]

Right.

[Bowen Yang]

If I had a leaf on my head during my entire workspace, I would.

[Sarah Sherman]

Think, well, good thing you're not a Pokemon, because there's. I think there's a Pokemon with a leaf on his head.

[Bowen Yang]

There's least type Pokemon. And you better watch your mouth.

[Matt Rogers]

Chikorita.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, hello.

[Sarah Sherman]

I just. I have more proof that that's the funniest word in history.

[Bowen Yang]

Chikorita.

[Sarah Sherman]

That.

[Matt Rogers]

That. That.

[Sarah Sherman]

I was your friend and you. I was offended by that.

[Bowen Yang]

And I was offended by that.

[Matt Rogers]

Lisa Barlow.

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait, what was it?

[Bowen Yang]

Hi.

[Matt Rogers]

I was her friend.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm your friend, and I was offended by that.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, I can't quote that. That's one of the craziest people moment.

[Sarah Sherman]

Garbage whore.

[Matt Rogers]

Garbage. Horror.

[Sarah Sherman]

The fact that she came back from that with me, like, the fact that.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, yeah. It's unbelievable. Well, did I ever tell you about. I was at Sundance one year and I. This is the same year I went to her store and I saw Meredith at an after party and I turned to her and I just go, meredith, you know, I root for you and Lisa. And she. And she literally turns to me and she goes, well, explain to me how that would work. And I was like, oh, my God.

[Sarah Sherman]

Wait, so then how have they healed from that?

[Bowen Yang]

I think you just kind of get over things when you're a housewife girl.

[Sarah Sherman]

When. When Heather said about Whitney, like, that she's a piece of shit.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. I'm like, you're a piece of shit. You're a fucking liar. You're a. That's literally what she said. Worst things you could call, like looking her in the eyes. No, you are.

[Sarah Sherman]

You're a liar, Lisa.

[Bowen Yang]

You're a liar.

[Matt Rogers]

You talked to Whitney last season and you're like, how are you with the Girl, how are you doing? And she goes, I'm good, because the girls are all good.

[Bowen Yang]

She said something to the. She said something like, everyone knows how to do the show, and we're a good cast, and we're together. And also, I did hear. I think Joel saw Meredith somewhere, and he was like, so, how are you feeling about the season? And Meredith, fully, with a big smile, was like, I loved it. Everyone really came to work this year. Like, they're loving it.

[Matt Rogers]

They're amazing.

[Bowen Yang]

Like, Angie K. Came on the show, and you could tell she felt like a queen. As she should.

[Matt Rogers]

As she should.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, two things I want to say. Please tell me when I'm afraid that when people see me, they see Bronwyn.

[Bowen Yang]

Why?

[Sarah Sherman]

Like, when Bronwyn walks into the room wearing Ronald McDonald's, it's like, costume.

[Bowen Yang]

Not costume.

[Matt Rogers]

Mama.

[Bowen Yang]

What?

[Matt Rogers]

She kept saying, mama.

[Bowen Yang]

Mama.

[Matt Rogers]

This is fashion.

[Bowen Yang]

Stop. I'm a Bronwyn fan. I don't get this Bronwyn hatred.

[Sarah Sherman]

See, that's not what I'm like, right When I walk in with my. With my eyes. Ostely's head, it's like, you don't see. Like, hot dog on a stick.

[Matt Rogers]

If you're anyone on Salt Lake, you're Lisa Barlow.

[Bowen Yang]

No. No, you're not.

[Matt Rogers]

Who am I?

[Bowen Yang]

Get this, right?

[Sarah Sherman]

You know, I think that you're Lisa and you're Meredith.

[Bowen Yang]

That is exactly what it is.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

We saw ourselves in the first season when Meredith tells Lisa, Seth and I are separating. And Lisa. Oh, my God. Wait, I'm gonna cry. I'm crying. Wait, I'm crying. No, no, no. Meredith. I love you guys so much. I'm really close with them. It's just really hurting me because we're always friends, you know, Meredith's like, it's okay. Wait, I'm gonna cry. I'm crying.

[Sarah Sherman]

You look like a trampoline with eyes.

[Bowen Yang]

Angie. Trampoline with eyes.

[Matt Rogers]

Trampoline with eyes.

[Bowen Yang]

Underrated. Trampoline with eyes. Look at trampoline with eyes. Crying, Rob, Angie, one foot in the grave and another on a banana peel. How does work she come up with that's amazing. And Bronwyn reading it. She's got one foot in the grave and another on a banana peel.

[Sarah Sherman]

Can you hear me?

[Bowen Yang]

How can you not laugh?

[Sarah Sherman]

It's like, I feel that way.

[Bowen Yang]

By the way that you have one foot in the grave and another on a banana, which means what to you?

[Sarah Sherman]

Half clown.

[Matt Rogers]

Half clown.

[Sarah Sherman]

Pagliacci's curves.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, Pagliacci.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, Bagliacci.

[Bowen Yang]

Who's Pagliacci?

[Sarah Sherman]

Can you do me a really big favor? Can you look up doctor who like skin stretched out person?

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, I know what you're talking about.

[Sarah Sherman]

That's trampoline with eyes.

[Bowen Yang]

That's trampoline with eyes.

[Matt Rogers]

No, and then, wait, can you do this thing?

[Sarah Sherman]

Insert image here.

[Bowen Yang]

And also make sure it says subscribe to Las Culturistas underneath it. Do it again. In fact, do it again.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, yeah. Subscribe to Lax Culture east as here.

[Bowen Yang]

Or should we say subscribe to I Heart.

[Matt Rogers]

Y'? All? I can't with y'. All.

[Bowen Yang]

Y' all are some clowns. Really? For real?

[Matt Rogers]

Really for real? What?

[Sarah Sherman]

Okay, my neighbor who's a brain scientist.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, yeah. Get into this. Should this be a two part episode? Should this be called Monstrosara Nicole Part one?

[Matt Rogers]

Hell, oh my God.

[Bowen Yang]

And then we'll do Monster Sarah Nicole part two. Part two.

[Sarah Sherman]

If we're brave.

[Bowen Yang]

No, we have to go to work.

[Matt Rogers]

We have to go to work.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, Jesus Christ. I forgot about that.

[Sarah Sherman]

Me, by the way. Me really too. Me really.

[Matt Rogers]

Me really too.

[Bowen Yang]

Take it back. Especially this week. Me really too. It's not me too. It's the sequel. Me really to hashtag. You thought we were. You thought we were stomping it out the first time. No, no. Me really.

[Sarah Sherman]

Pussy grabs back. You thought pussy was sitting on the shelf? Well, guess what? It was sitting on the shelf so long in the cabinet in the dark that it became one of those potatoes with the little arms growing out.

[Bowen Yang]

Pussy grubs back and this time it reeks.

[Matt Rogers]

That's actually really good. Scare him off a little bit, Will.

[Sarah Sherman]

A culture number a thousand.

[Bowen Yang]

We've never gone that high, you fucking freak. You really came in here and said. You really said. It's Sarah's culture.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm gonna say the culture. That was for me. When the pussy's on the shelf. David Lynch. Wish you could drag that.

[Bowen Yang]

Well, he passed.

[Matt Rogers]

He's dead. Dead man.

[Sarah Sherman]

My neighbor's a brain scientist.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, yeah. Get into this. Sorry.

[Sarah Sherman]

She said that global warming.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, no. What does she know? She's a brain scientist. That's not a climate science.

[Matt Rogers]

Global is not a brain. Yeah, okay.

[Bowen Yang]

Just because they're shaped the same. A big circle. A brain in a globe.

[Sarah Sherman]

That's why my brain's always rolling around in my head like a marble.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, exactly. Did you tell her all this?

[Matt Rogers]

Peanut headed.

[Bowen Yang]

What did she. What did she.

[Matt Rogers]

What did she say? Global peanut headed bitch.

[Sarah Sherman]

One time my boyfriend drew picture of me. That was little. Little peanut head and me screaming. Pay attention. To me. And he called it peanut head.

[Matt Rogers]

And now Sarah, whenever she's in a wig, it's like, oh, that's the most peanut headed I've ever seen.

[Sarah Sherman]

Peanut head.

[Matt Rogers]

A little head.

[Bowen Yang]

You have such a good head for it.

[Matt Rogers]

He's a great head.

[Bowen Yang]

I love it. Makes me laugh immediately when I see you in, like, a red bob. Or like.

[Sarah Sherman]

Or like, wait, you got obsessed with that one bob.

[Bowen Yang]

She's like, you as a blonde. I was, too.

[Sarah Sherman]

There's something, like, amazing about I ha.

[Matt Rogers]

No, it's. It's an amazing moment when you transform.

[Sarah Sherman]

I just. It's like every. It's just like, listen, I am grateful for this job because so many things, but the fact that for a job, I get to wear a wig and.

[Bowen Yang]

Go, oh, who is she?

[Matt Rogers]

There was a wig that was so perfect on Sarah. That. And I. And I don't mean to like out you as anything, like, narcissistic. It's just. It was like, I. I got it because you just kept Sarah and I sit next to each other on Saturday for our makeup and hair. And it really was a moment of Sarah just being, like, looking at herself for at least five minutes.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm a pretty girl, Mom.

[Matt Rogers]

Being like, I'm beautiful.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah, I did the substance mirror thing.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, but positive. But positive. You did it. But you were like, oh.

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh.

[Bowen Yang]

You were, like, so happy.

[Sarah Sherman]

I felt about when I had my Tina Turner with wig. I had a Tina Turner wig in that Pongo sketch. It was. Insert image here.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, Turner wig.

[Sarah Sherman]

And one time I had to wear a Reba wig.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, that was great.

[Sarah Sherman]

And it was like. I was. I kind of was like.

[Bowen Yang]

Were you playing Reba?

[Sarah Sherman]

No, not at all. But it was a Reba wig per se. But in a way. Well, all actors have, you know, I was kind of channeling.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, you can't really put a Reba wig on without doing a. You have a little Reba at least once.

[Sarah Sherman]

That was amazing.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm pretty good. I'm pretty good at singing. I work hard.

[Sarah Sherman]

When you were singing in the hallway and it was resounding and reverberating, I was like the all funny drained out of my body, and I was just living in, like, pure, honest moment. I was just like, wow, beautiful.

[Bowen Yang]

That's really kind.

[Matt Rogers]

What did your neighbor say?

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, what if.

[Bowen Yang]

Cause you said.

[Sarah Sherman]

You started with that's beautiful. What did your neighbor say?

[Bowen Yang]

Because he's done with me.

[Matt Rogers]

I need to pee so bad.

[Sarah Sherman]

Okay, okay.

[Bowen Yang]

Pee.

[Sarah Sherman]

Go. Go pee, girl.

[Bowen Yang]

How bad is it?

[Matt Rogers]

Pretty bad. I've been holding it in for at least a half hour.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, you've been dealing with a lot with that.

[Matt Rogers]

Should I go now? But I don't want to lose that. We've been on momentum this whole time.

[Sarah Sherman]

Okay, so my neighbor said that climate change. You.

[Bowen Yang]

You really can tell that's here?

[Sarah Sherman]

Trump? Really? Trump, Come on now, girl. Greenland.

[Bowen Yang]

Trump, girl, get real, girl.

[Sarah Sherman]

Get real. Greenland. Really? Leave it alone. Really?

[Bowen Yang]

What did your climate. What did you sorry brain scientists say about the climate.

[Sarah Sherman]

She said that global warrant. You. You know, that. That global warming is happening because dogs have dog bites are up because they're the ozone. Dogs, like, are breathing in ozone and it's making them go crazy. And the first thing I said was Bronwen.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, my God. And then your neighbor was like, who?

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah, no, literally.

[Bowen Yang]

You know what's crazy?

[Sarah Sherman]

Brains apparently don't watch Real Housewives.

[Bowen Yang]

What's crazy about the Bronwyn dog is. Attack is she got attacked by her favorite thing because, you know, she's got all those dogs named after the House of Cards characters, which. This show is the best show on television. I'm sorry. All my dogs are named after characters from my favorite show, House of Cards. An insane show.

[Sarah Sherman]

Let me be Frank.

[Matt Rogers]

Let me.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, my God, you are so. I'm gonna light you on fire. Let me be Frank.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know, those dogs were named after. Let me be Frank. Like, they're young dogs and this girl is naming.

[Bowen Yang]

I mean, House of cards was like 2013.

[Matt Rogers]

That's an old show.

[Bowen Yang]

So she must have started binging like a few years ago.

[Sarah Sherman]

Don't those dogs look like, newer than that?

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, they're not like, housebroken.

[Bowen Yang]

I mean, if she had. If she had started the show when it came on, like many of us do, and then I guess she named her, she might have named her dog. I would imagine her first dog was named Frank, and you'd think the second one was Claire. Those dogs are old now.

[Matt Rogers]

Those are old dogs.

[Bowen Yang]

Really old.

[Matt Rogers]

13 year old dogs.

[Sarah Sherman]

I thought all of her dogs looked really young. And I was like, that's crazy that she named them that recently.

[Bowen Yang]

I mean, I am looking at the.

[Sarah Sherman]

Dogs and they don't look old enough to be from OG season.

[Bowen Yang]

So bless up. She started watching House of Cards after all everything came out. After everything came out about Kevin Spacey. She said, not only am I gonna start streaming, I'm gonna name all my pets after this. This is just conjecture. We don't know. They could be.

[Matt Rogers]

They got money.

[Bowen Yang]

You know, those dogs have money. They can get. They can get Everything replaced They took the substance hey, group mind, group mind.

[Sarah Sherman]

Group mind, group mind.

[Bowen Yang]

When you can get in a river them ride the wave, babe.

[Sarah Sherman]

One foot in the grave and another on appeal.

[Bowen Yang]

Look at that Melody.

[Sarah Sherman]

I know. Whoa.

[Bowen Yang]

Another on appeal.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know what I mean? Banana.

[Matt Rogers]

You need to be in the Minions movies.

[Bowen Yang]

Wait, Erica. Erica. Jane. We're on appeal for legal reasons. We're on appeal. We're on appeal. We're on appeal for legal reasons.

[Sarah Sherman]

Sam was an evil man. Oh, no. But he was driving it.

[Bowen Yang]

He hated better.

[Matt Rogers]

The car flipped it.

[Bowen Yang]

So.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

There's a logo on it. He's iconic.

[Matt Rogers]

He's amazing.

[Sarah Sherman]

The car flipped over how many times?

[Matt Rogers]

Three. Three times.

[Sarah Sherman]

Because it was snowing in pests. Kyle's like, what?

[Bowen Yang]

Or what? Or what?

[Sarah Sherman]

Or what? Your ugly leather pants just the up, Kyle. Hey, girl.

[Matt Rogers]

Girl.

[Bowen Yang]

What do you have to say to Kyle Richards? Talk to the camera, cuz after you say it, we're going to do. I don't think so. Funny. And then we're going to let him pee. Finally.

[Sarah Sherman]

Please, girl, you gotta speak truth to power.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Matt Rogers]

Who's the power? She's the.

[Bowen Yang]

I think, unfortunately she's the power and we've given her too much of it.

[Matt Rogers]

I agree.

[Sarah Sherman]

Speak. Be honest.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Say. Okay, Say I'm gay. Or say I was gay for a second.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Or say Mauricio cheated on me with Dorit. Just say it.

[Bowen Yang]

My take on Kyle is she literally. The cameras are only there for her own comfort. Because I do think she's dealing with a pretty real thing, which is that she's separated from her husband. He's not around, and none of her kids are around. So I think the cameras are there more so that she can have the voices, people that she knows there so she doesn't spin out. But she shouldn't be on the real reality show anymore. She's not willing to portray her reality, which she's not willing to do in any shape or form, period.

[Matt Rogers]

No, you're so. You're very right, philosopher king.

[Bowen Yang]

Tell your brain scientist neighbor that to chew on that for once.

[Matt Rogers]

The ozone's making him spit fire.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. Dog attacks are up. You know.

[Sarah Sherman]

And you know what? Fucking.

[Bowen Yang]

You know what?

[Sarah Sherman]

I changed everything. I said that woman was mauled.

[Bowen Yang]

Yes, she was. And you made a joke out of it. You made humor out of it and it sucked.

[Matt Rogers]

It wasn't comedy, it was humor.

[Bowen Yang]

And Sarah, it sucks to sit here while you did that cheering on violence against women.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know what?

[Bowen Yang]

This week, this week, if you don't laugh, you'll Cry. I believe the phrase goes. The old adage.

[Sarah Sherman]

You said that like Yoda. The phrase, the phrase goes. I'll believe.

[Bowen Yang]

Just someone looking me dead in your eyes.

[Sarah Sherman]

It's too funny. That's too, too funny.

[Matt Rogers]

Too furious.

[Bowen Yang]

That's all you had to say to Kyle, did you just give him time? Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Bye, Eileen.

[Bowen Yang]

Like and subscribe to Lost Cult.

[Sarah Sherman]

Can I buy Nosferat too?

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, Kyle would have been good in that. She should have been Lily Rose Depp's role.

[Matt Rogers]

Goldie Rose Depp.

[Bowen Yang]

Lily Rose.

[Matt Rogers]

Lily. I think you said Goldie Rose.

[Bowen Yang]

Goldie Rose would be funny.

[Sarah Sherman]

Britney could. Could have played that.

[Bowen Yang]

Britney Bman.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

Did you see Nos? Yes. Clearly you saw it.

[Sarah Sherman]

This is awesome.

[Bowen Yang]

You loved it. Your top two of the year are Nosferatu and Substance.

[Sarah Sherman]

My top two of the year are the Substance and the Real Housewives of Subs. Salt Lake City Finale Period.

[Bowen Yang]

Great. What if your WI fi wasn't just WI fi, but the magic holding your whole holiday together?

[Matt Rogers]

Well, with Xfinity WI Fi, it kind of is.

[Bowen Yang]

Picture this. Powered by their best, most elite high performing tech, this WI fi doesn't just connect devices. It keeps the peace at home during the most wonderful and most stressful time of the year.

[Matt Rogers]

It's kind of like having a little holiday helper working behind the scenes, making sure the holiday playlist never skips the beat and the video call with grandma doesn't freeze. Mid Cookie tutorial.

[Bowen Yang]

It's wifi that keeps your whole home connected so you can actually enjoy the holiday magic chaos free. The best present of all.

[Matt Rogers]

Let me paint a picture for you. A holiday movie marathon is streaming in the living room. Your kid is video chatting their friends from their tablet and your partner is shopping for too many gifts and cinnamon candles. Oh, not this season. Not with Xfinity WI Fi.

[Bowen Yang]

With Xfinity you can boost the wifi to your device only. So when you go to upload 200 photos of that cat in a cute little Santa hat, you won't see that dreaded failed to upload message. Not this season. Not with Xfinity WiFi. And what if you had a way to make sure family time during the holidays had zero distractions? With Xfinity WiFi, you can pause the kids wifi and enjoy those special moments together.

[Matt Rogers]

And if you're wondering what other parental instincts your wifi has during this baby busy season, Xfinity protects your kids when they're online so you know they're safe even if you're busy making cocoa or taste testing cookies.

[Bowen Yang]

What someone has to make sure there's exactly the same amount of chocolate chips in each cookie. And what if your Wi Fi could proactively fix issues before they even happen? Well, that's exactly what Xfinity Wi Fi does. Like the friend who shows up with extra wrapping paper, bows and tape before you even realize you're out. Because, let's be honest, you never buy enough.

[Matt Rogers]

Bottom line, Xfinity WiFi isn't just smart, it's brilliant. And during the holidays, that brilliance, that's a gift. Xfinity. Imagine that you ever just stop in.

[Bowen Yang]

The middle of a crazy day and realize, wow, I needed a break.

[Matt Rogers]

It literally happened to me yesterday. I cracked open a Diet Coke, sat back for five minutes. Total reset, right?

[Bowen Yang]

There's something about the crispy, refreshing taste of an ice cold Diet Coke. It just hits.

[Matt Rogers]

It's my little me moment. Like, make time for a Diet Coke break, you know?

[Bowen Yang]

Exactly. Diet Coke is the perfect companion for all break moments. Diet Coke. This is my taste. Two questions. What are you doing right now? And why aren't you on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise?

[Matt Rogers]

Well, obviously you're listening to us. Smart use of your time.

[Bowen Yang]

True. But you could also be on a Virgin Voyages Caribbean cruise at the same time. That's just brilliant time management.

[Matt Rogers]

Very true. This gives me an idea. Let's do a quick cruise quiz. Ready? First cruise. Dining. Do you prefer buffet or a curated dining experience with access to 20 distinct restaurants?

[Bowen Yang]

Curated dining. Next.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay, good choice. That's what Virgin Voyages offers. Second question. Would you rather have an overstuffed itinerary or the freedom to explore stunning Caribbean.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, I want the freedom to explore stunning Caribbean destinations. Again. I think I see where this quiz is going. Virgin Voyages is amazing.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, Absolutely. The cruises are kid free. From sunrise yoga to late night cocktails, every moment is made for grown up fun.

[Bowen Yang]

Nothing again. Hence, kids. Kids are awesome. But sometimes it's nice to be kid free.

[Matt Rogers]

And there's so much included value. Over $1,000.

[Bowen Yang]

Over $1,000 of awesomeness. All included. Wi Fi soda, top tier entertainment, over 20 restaurants, and even group fitness classes. No hidden fees, no surprise charges. Virgin Voyages gives you the kind of luxury you actually deserve.

[Sarah Sherman]

And you know what?

[Matt Rogers]

I deserve luxury.

[Bowen Yang]

You do? And me too. Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

There's always something happening on board. From wellness focused on sailings to epic holiday voyages. Live music, DJs, themed parties and more. Boredom doesn't board the ship.

[Bowen Yang]

And there are so many amazing stops. You leave from Miami and sail to places like Grand Cayman, Jamaica, Puerto Rico and the Dominican Republic. Virgin even has their own private beach club in Bimini. And they're adding stops in 2025 and 2026.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, like Aruba, St. Lucia and Curacao.

[Bowen Yang]

But it's not all go, go, go, Right?

[Matt Rogers]

You can totally go into relaxation mode too. Your cabin is a full on sanctuary, private terrace, ocean views, and their signature red hammock just waiting for you to swing.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, and did I mention Virgin Voyages is launching a new ship. The brilliant lady. Brilliant name, by the way. She's bigger, bolder, and packed with even more Virgin wow factor.

[Matt Rogers]

Book [e-mail] or contact your travel advisor.

[Bowen Yang]

That's virginvoyages.com do you know what the.

[Matt Rogers]

Perfect thing to bring to any event is? Any dinner, any little party, any occasion. Formal, casual, you name it.

[Bowen Yang]

What's that?

[Matt Rogers]

Casamigos.

[Bowen Yang]

Wow. That really, really is chic.

[Matt Rogers]

Right? There's nothing like having Casamigos at a party with your friends.

[Bowen Yang]

That makes sense, seeing as Casamigos whole vibe is friendship. It's literally in the name.

[Matt Rogers]

I didn't realize that. Well, the vibe is working because everyone loves it. It's good with anything. Watermelon juice, Bloody Mary mix, coconut, grapefruit, diet freaking cola, for crying out loud.

[Bowen Yang]

The deepest friendships have been forged over Casamigos margaritas.

[Matt Rogers]

Casamigos margarita. Now that's a slay.

[Bowen Yang]

Now Casamigos. Anything is a slay.

[Matt Rogers]

Anything goes with my Casamigos.

[Bowen Yang]

That is so true.

[Matt Rogers]

You can thank me later. Please drink responsibly. Imported by Casamigos Spirits Company, White Plains, New York. Casamigos Tequila. 40% alcohol by volume.

[Bowen Yang]

So it's time for. I don't think so, honey. This is our famous segment, Sarah, where we take one minute to really take down something in a culture that we feel deserves it. This is our moment to do that.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes. Do you have something?

[Bowen Yang]

Don't really have anything.

[Matt Rogers]

Okay.

[Bowen Yang]

But do you?

[Sarah Sherman]

I really do. And you know, you actually know about mine too.

[Matt Rogers]

I know about. Yeah. Okay, then. Then it's gonna be amazing. I can go first.

[Bowen Yang]

Okay. This is Bowen Yang's. I don't think so, honey. And his time starts now.

[Matt Rogers]

I don't think so, honey. Humidifier. I'm waking up in the morning. You're blasting off all night in the corner. I'm waking up in the morning, lips still chapped.

[Bowen Yang]

How come is that.

[Matt Rogers]

How come is that humidified? If you're not doing the do, then I can't give the give. In my everyday life, I'm walking around with chapped lips and a chapped Ass. While we're at it all because the droplets, the mist, whatever you do, what do you do? What do you do?

[Bowen Yang]

Well, successfully.

[Matt Rogers]

Successfully. In the words of Bianca Del Rio to Laganja Estrada. What do you do successfully? Humidifier.

[Bowen Yang]

To be honest.

[Sarah Sherman]

Honest.

[Matt Rogers]

To Trinity. Oh, I thought it was. To Laganja.

[Bowen Yang]

15 seconds.

[Matt Rogers]

An amazing season of television.

[Bowen Yang]

Great season.

[Matt Rogers]

RuPaul's Drag Race season six.

[Bowen Yang]

And we're going to be reviewing it.

[Matt Rogers]

And we're going to be reviewing. We're doing a recap podcast on our Patreon. Just kidding.

[Bowen Yang]

We Drag Race review. Five seconds.

[Matt Rogers]

Humidifier.

[Bowen Yang]

Do your job. Thank you. That was one minute.

[Sarah Sherman]

Bowen, would you say that you are dry as your mother's vagina?

[Matt Rogers]

Sort of like your vagina.

[Bowen Yang]

Sort of like vagina. Legendra should have won that season. That was an amazing season for her impact on culture. She should have won.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, absolutely.

[Bowen Yang]

You know what? Put my time on. This is Matt.

[Sarah Sherman]

Riders.

[Bowen Yang]

I don't think so.

[Matt Rogers]

Time starts now.

[Bowen Yang]

I don't think so, honey. That Landra Astra didn't win season six of RuPaul's Drag Race. You're still quoting it. You're still obsessed. Yeah. Bianca, we love you. We're not quoting. I guess I just did. Not today, Satan. We still. You know what, Bianca? You deserve your victory. It should have been a tie. The Monet X change Trinity Que Bonetie shouldn't have been the one tie. Laganja should have tore up that win just like she tore up the whole season. And I feel very attacked that she didn't win. In fact, you know what? I've actually hung out with Laganja Estranja, a lovely person, of course, and let the girls have their marijuana if they need it to be.

[Matt Rogers]

Right.

[Bowen Yang]

Because she probably would have actually ate down on the that season, truly, even more than she already did, if they had allowed her her little reefer, medicinal marijuana. And you know what? Of all weeks to not let Laganja smoke weed on season six of all weeks. You picked this week. I don't think so, honey. And we're not headed in the right direction in this country. We're not.

[Matt Rogers]

And that's one minute.

[Sarah Sherman]

Does anyone know? Could anyone do the stand up set by heart?

[Bowen Yang]

Sort of like Overjoy? Can we honor it? Hey, hey.

[Sarah Sherman]

Get your lighters.

[Matt Rogers]

Get your lighters up. My name is Laganja. Hold on. We need to do it. We need to pull up and do it and do a reading. Laganja, stand up. Set.

[Bowen Yang]

I. And also, I respect the hell out of her that she Will not return to the show.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, really?

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah. I'm sure they've asked many times, because who wouldn't want to see that? She came back to, like, absolutely slay a lip sync to Dua Lipa's physical.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes.

[Bowen Yang]

That was a total knockout. But she won't return to the show to compete because it's like she's had it good. Okay, what is it?

[Matt Rogers]

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

[Bowen Yang]

Put your lighters up.

[Matt Rogers]

Ganda's in the house. Oh. As you can tell from my accent, I'm from Dallas, Texas, and it was.

[Bowen Yang]

Not very easy growing up like this.

[Matt Rogers]

Whether I was playing in my grandma's.

[Bowen Yang]

Clothes or putting on a show for my well organized, alphabetically ordered beanie babies.

[Matt Rogers]

I was G, G, G gay ochre.

[Bowen Yang]

But it wasn't until I moved to.

[Matt Rogers]

Los Angeles that I discovered marijuana. I mean, I like to smoke, y'.

[Bowen Yang]

All.

[Matt Rogers]

I'm just flying high as your receding hairline. Okur. Marijuana really does help me calm down. See, y'.

[Bowen Yang]

All, I went to Valencia, where they filmed the TV show Weeds.

[Matt Rogers]

Now, y', all, it's very dry. It's almost kind of like your vagina.

[Bowen Yang]

Can I get a name? Amen.

[Matt Rogers]

Now, y', all.

[Bowen Yang]

I'm a tree hugger. Because if it ain't green, I'm not interested. Can I tell you something? Had she done this in a way that, like, at the time, really owned it. Like, had she been high, it would have. This would have ate.

[Sarah Sherman]

Like, had she gone out and done.

[Bowen Yang]

This, like, it to me, is funny. Because if it ain't green, huh, I'm not interested.

[Matt Rogers]

That's a killer.

[Bowen Yang]

But this is what I'm saying is she created what comedy is, right? Like, right. This podcast wouldn't exist. You think this podcast would exist?

[Sarah Sherman]

You think the Comedy Cellar was built in a day?

[Matt Rogers]

Angie K. Needs a set at the Comedy Cellar.

[Bowen Yang]

We need Angie K. And Laganja Estranja doing, like, a travel show together.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Sarah Sherman]

Okay.

[Bowen Yang]

I bet Angie K. Smokes some reefer. Don't laugh, Rebecca.

[Sarah Sherman]

No, her house is too pointy. I would be afraid of you with.

[Bowen Yang]

The shapes of tips of things.

[Matt Rogers]

The shapes of tips. What else?

[Sarah Sherman]

What else?

[Bowen Yang]

Your head. What else? You said Amaya triangle. Amaya triangle. You asked, like, 15 times.

[Sarah Sherman]

I'm a visual learner.

[Bowen Yang]

Are you?

[Sarah Sherman]

In many ways, when I look at her house, I go, I would, like. If I was too high, I would, like, fallen down and hit my head on one of those pointy marble slabs.

[Bowen Yang]

I know. I appreciate a house that's really dangerous. To live in. That's actually my aesthetic. Like a hazardous place with. Where if you even think about bringing your kids, they're gonna get hurt.

[Sarah Sherman]

Right.

[Bowen Yang]

Don't bring kids into my house.

[Sarah Sherman]

Don't bring kids into my refrigerator.

[Bowen Yang]

House.

[Sarah Sherman]

House.

[Bowen Yang]

Exactly. My house is ice cold and pointy as shit.

[Matt Rogers]

Remember when Monica fell down the stairs?

[Bowen Yang]

My God. Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

And then her mom ate guacamole and said my. My green ice cream or something.

[Bowen Yang]

Monica's mother. We forgot how crazy that was.

[Matt Rogers]

The craziest woman.

[Bowen Yang]

What was her name?

[Sarah Sherman]

Like Tippi Hedren or something?

[Bowen Yang]

That's what it was. Tippy Head.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes.

[Bowen Yang]

Yes.

[Matt Rogers]

Thank you.

[Sarah Sherman]

I feel like it kind of was that.

[Bowen Yang]

What was hell was Monica's mom's name?

[Sarah Sherman]

What did I say?

[Matt Rogers]

You were right.

[Bowen Yang]

Tippy Hedrick. All right, so this is Sarah's.

[Sarah Sherman]

Mine's. Like, you guys are gonna have to edit it out. It's gonna be so brutal.

[Bowen Yang]

Okay.

[Matt Rogers]

Oh, this is Sarah Sherman's. I don't think so, honey. Her time starts now.

[Sarah Sherman]

And I'm speaking my truth. This is. You know this is true. I know. The clock is running. I'll take my time.

[Bowen Yang]

How much I wonder.

[Sarah Sherman]

Santa Maria Nolla. I don't think so, honey. That you reformulated my Pachuli. I have been wearing the same Pachuli from Santa Maria Nolla for five years. I went to go buy another bottle, spray it on me. I go, I'm sorry. Why is it not spraying? Sticky, sticky. Why is it not so sticky? Why is it not coming out? Smelling like balsamic vinaigrette and stank and rank. Why does it not. Why does it smell nice? Why doesn't it smell like a dog peed on me? You changed it. I called the office in Italy. They've been making perfumes there in an apothecary. Monks make the perfumes since the 1600s in Tuscany. Five seconds, I call them and I say, you reformulate. They said, no, he didn't. I go, but when I spray my shirt, it's not stained brown because that was the old formula.

[Bowen Yang]

That's funny. Keep going though.

[Sarah Sherman]

My old patchouli formulation. It used to. Used to spray it on your shirt. There would be a big brown stain like you spilled soy sauce on you. We're not gonna be just the way I like it.

[Matt Rogers]

This is just too brutal.

[Bowen Yang]

Brutal. Too brutal.

[Sarah Sherman]

Just the way I like it. The bottle would be so sticky brown. Sticky all over, like syrup. You couldn't even touch it. I used to be able to walk into a fucking elevator and everyone would Go, whoa, whoa, whoa. Get a job, hippie. And now it smells nice. And then they gaslight me and I call and I was like, hey, you guys.

[Bowen Yang]

Hey, you stupid monk. Change it back, you freaks. You queerdo freakish monks. Get fucked.

[Sarah Sherman]

This Italian woman was like, no, it's the same. I email every email.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, do the accent, Bungiorno. Okay. No. Oh, my God, that sucks.

[Sarah Sherman]

Mamma mia. That's a patchouli pizza.

[Bowen Yang]

That. That you're on snl.

[Sarah Sherman]

Hey, no, I'm not. Actra down.

[Matt Rogers]

Actra. And they so.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, you know what I have to do? I have to go on ebay. I have to google Santa Maria Noela Patchouli, and guess what comes up? Bottles. Literally with one tablespoon of the patchouli left. And I'm buying it for $150 because. Because that's how badly I want it. And everybody know and that. And that's why everyone on ebay is up charging. Literally.

[Bowen Yang]

I bought it.

[Matt Rogers]

Sarah's buying because Sarah's buying.

[Sarah Sherman]

And they are trying to upsell thimbles left of this old patchouli formulation. So I beg you, Santa Maria, and develop it. I know the platform that this podcast has clock has been.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, no, I. I stopped.

[Sarah Sherman]

I know what, what? The power of las culturistas.

[Bowen Yang]

So I don't think so. In conclusion. I don't think so, honey.

[Sarah Sherman]

The gaslighting of women on a day week like this.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, we like this.

[Matt Rogers]

Yes. Wow. No, this was a saga.

[Bowen Yang]

But I thought it had been resolved.

[Matt Rogers]

I thought you had found the patchouli again.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, I found. This is what happened. Then I found the bottles on ebay that people were reselling the half empty bottle. But now everybody's caught on that the patchouli is different.

[Matt Rogers]

But how does every.

[Sarah Sherman]

So now it's less on ebay.

[Matt Rogers]

But how do I. All these ebay people have a little droplet left over. Like, who are these people?

[Sarah Sherman]

I don't know. I literally. There's like, there's. There's. There's someone for everyone out there. There is someone for everyone. And it just. They. They change it and it smells like. Nice. And I. I liked when I smelled like vinegar.

[Matt Rogers]

Yeah.

[Sarah Sherman]

I used to smell. When I used to come into my office, Just keep breathing and breathing and breathing and breathing. When I breathe in, I swear, you.

[Matt Rogers]

Should just put vinegar in the bottle. Vinegar and soy sauce.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, I just put vinegar, soy sauce, stinky socks. That's dog pee, cat pee.

[Bowen Yang]

All right.

[Sarah Sherman]

And now it smells like grass. I don't think so, honey. Smelling like nice grass on the shelf.

[Matt Rogers]

Smells like pussy on the shelf. The shelf.

[Sarah Sherman]

Well, my time restarted.

[Matt Rogers]

I got a UTI from holding in this piss.

[Sarah Sherman]

The hemorrhoid of the penis.

[Bowen Yang]

Is it that bad?

[Matt Rogers]

Well, it's. You know, I've been holding it in for a while.

[Bowen Yang]

I asked for the third time, if it's that more time has passed, it.

[Sarah Sherman]

Could be Logan Roy going to the brain drive. You piss crazy.

[Bowen Yang]

What is that?

[Matt Rogers]

Is that what happened to Logan Roy?

[Sarah Sherman]

He went piss crazy on that one episode.

[Matt Rogers]

Is that. What is that? Who died?

[Bowen Yang]

Who's your favorite Roy?

[Sarah Sherman]

Oh, wow. Kendall.

[Matt Rogers]

Kendall.

[Sarah Sherman]

That is just.

[Bowen Yang]

If that's Long Island Kendall, Roy triggers me because that's Long island way.

[Sarah Sherman]

That is every person we grew up with down.

[Bowen Yang]

Yeah, yeah. If they had had money, which around me. Well, whatever. Yeah, you're right. That's why it triggers me.

[Sarah Sherman]

You know, I just remembered that you guys.

[Bowen Yang]

That he has to pee really bad. No, wait, what did you Remember?

[Sarah Sherman]

For the 5th grade talent show, my friends did a dance. Dance to hey. And they were like, sarah, you can, like, be in the back and, like, press play on the boombox.

[Matt Rogers]

That's. That's a traumatic memory. They have to switch out the cards.

[Bowen Yang]

Because we've been going for two hours. So we're gonna end it. This has been so wonderful. It was great to get to know you a little bit better.

[Matt Rogers]

I don't want to end this.

[Bowen Yang]

Trust and believe. I'm having a great. The great thing about you guys having. Having booked SNL is now you get to go hang out with each other even more. And you know what I want you guys to do? Write something together this week. You are.

[Matt Rogers]

I'll tell you.

[Bowen Yang]

We are.

[Sarah Sherman]

I legit am tired from laughing.

[Matt Rogers]

It's crazy.

[Bowen Yang]

We end every episode with a song.

[Sarah Sherman]

Hey, Yahoo. Hey, y'. All.

[Bowen Yang]

Hey, Sarah, you can push the boombox in the back.

[Sarah Sherman]

Hey.

[Bowen Yang]

Oh, hey.

[Matt Rogers]

For more, listen to outkast speaker box. Speaker box.

[Bowen Yang]

Love below. Love below.

[Matt Rogers]

The classic album double album Double album at Aliens. Las Culturistas is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeartRadio podcasts.

[Bowen Yang]

Created and hosted by Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, executive produced by Anna Hasnier.

[Matt Rogers]

And Hansani, produced by Becca Ramos, edited and mixed by Doug Behm and Monique Lebord.

[Bowen Yang]

And our music is by Henry Komirsky.

[Matt Rogers]

Ever ask yourself, what am I capable of?

[Bowen Yang]

Ford believes only you can answer that, even if others try to do it for you. You're the one who defines your legacy, chases the horizon, engineers your dreams. Conquers the curves.

[Matt Rogers]

That capability, it's in you just like it's built into every F150 Bronco, Mustang and every other Ford vehicle.

[Bowen Yang]

Because whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right.

[Matt Rogers]

Ready, set, Ford. Visit Ford.com to learn more.

[Sarah Sherman]

This is Sophie Cunningham from Show Me Something. Do you know the symptoms of moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, or osa, in adults with obesity? They may be happening to you without you knowing. If anyone has ever said you snore loudly, or if you spend your days fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability and concentration issues, it may be due to osa. OSA is a serious condition where your airway partially or completely collapses during sleep, which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at don'tsleep on OSA.com this information is provided by Lilly, a medicine company at cvs. It matters that we're not just in your community, but that we're part of it. It matters that we're here for you when you need us, day or night, and we want everyone to feel welcomed and rewarded. It matters that CVS is here to fill your prescriptions and here to fill your craving for a tasty and, yeah, healthy snack. At cvs, yes, we're proud to serve your community because we believe where you get your medicine matters. So Visit [e-mail] or just come by our store. We can't wait to meet you. Store hours vary by location. Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line. But first.

[Bowen Yang]

There the last one.

[Sarah Sherman]

Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes. This is an I Heart podcast. Guaranteed human.