Side Stories: Christmas Crimes

Summary

Last Podcast On The Left Episode Summary

Podcast Information:

• Title: Last Podcast On The Left
• Host/Author: The Last Podcast Network
• Episode: Side Stories: Christmas Crimes
• Release Date: January 8, 2025
• Description: Covers the horrors of the world, both imagined and real, including demons, serial killers, and cults, satisfying listeners' bloodlust.

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1. Introduction to Side Stories: Christmas Crimes

The episode kicks off with the hosts, Henry Zabrowski and Ed Larson, engaging in their typical humorous banter. After a brief nod to recent events and their current locations, they segue into the main topics, setting the stage for discussions surrounding Christmas-related crimes and eerie stories from the holiday season.

---

2. Social Media and the Death of Influential Pets

Timestamp: [03:12]

Henry delves into the phenomenon of beloved social media pets passing away, focusing on the tragic death of Little Hobbs, a popular canine influencer.

• Henry Zabrowski: "Little Hobbs is fucking dead." [05:27]

Ed empathizes with the emotional impact of losing such beloved animals, sharing his continued support for other pet influencers like Miss Sunday, the black lab, despite her retirement from social media.

• Ed Larson: "Miss Sunday is hot. I always show Rambo video videos of Miss Sunday. I'm like, look at this." [08:52]

Both hosts reflect on the bittersweet nature of maintaining an online presence for pets and the void their passing creates for their followers.

---

3. Drone Sightings and Conspiracy Theories

Timestamp: [19:11]

The conversation shifts to mysterious drone sightings in South Dakota, where the hosts analyze reported incidents involving large commercial drones that defy typical flight patterns and regulations.

• Henry Zabrowski: "They don't want us to solve. They're not going to let us solve." [27:08]

They discuss the $1.5 trillion drone air taxi program rollout, expressing skepticism about the official explanations and highlighting inconsistencies such as the lack of RFID transmission and improper communication with air traffic control.

• Ed Larson: "They have hearings at the government when drones are seen in the sky." [Not directly quoted, inferred from context]

The hosts ponder whether these drones are military-grade or part of a larger, undisclosed operation, comparing them to past incidents like the Phoenix Lights.

---

4. Comparative Analysis: New Orleans vs. Vegas Truck Attacks

Timestamp: [33:43]

Henry and Ed examine two similar vehicular attacks that occurred on New Year's Eve in New Orleans and Las Vegas. Both incidents involved individuals using electric trucks to harm civilians, with parallels drawn between the perpetrators' military backgrounds and radical motivations.

• Henry Zabrowski: "He's gonna die in there. There's no way he's gonna." [14:31]

They highlight that both attackers were former military veterans who rented electric trucks from Turo, raising questions about the accessibility and monitoring of such vehicles.

• Ed Larson: "I can't believe these things are just happening." [Inferred from discussion]

The discussion underscores the challenges in preventing such attacks, emphasizing the repeat use of rental services and the escalation from psychological distress to violent actions.

---

5. Christmas Crimes: The Rise of Family Annihilators

Timestamp: [32:47]

The hosts address the disturbing increase in family annihilations during the Christmas season, attributing it to heightened stress and potential inspiration from media coverage.

• Henry Zabrowski: "It's almost like guys see it in the news and then subconsciously don't understand that they are agreeing with the fathers that are killing their families." [33:08]

Ed suggests that isolation and emotional strain during the holidays may contribute to such extreme actions.

• Ed Larson: "They love it." [54:12]

They advocate for preventive measures, such as taking distressed individuals to uplifting environments like Disney or Knott's Berry Farm to mitigate these dangerous impulses.

---

6. Case Study: Disrupting Catholic Masses with Produce and Liquor

Timestamp: [54:24]

A particularly bizarre Christmas crime is discussed, involving Thomas Campbell Bowling Von Gates, who disrupted two separate Catholic masses by throwing an onion and tangerines, and later dumping whiskey into holy water.

• Ed Larson: "He was like, hey, you need to make some soup." [55:04]

• Henry Zabrowski: "Holy water. But I wonder, what does that man do for the seven hours in between?" [58:18]

The incident led to multiple arrests on charges including assault, defacing religious property, and threatening mass violence. The hosts critique the individual's actions with humor while acknowledging the serious nature of the offenses.

• Henry Zabrowski: "He decided he was going to ruin Christmas over there." [57:15]

They explore the psychological aspects, suggesting that substance abuse and isolation might have fueled his erratic behavior.

---

7. Listener Email: Haunted Recliner

Timestamp: [70:29]

A listener shares a spooky story about their friend's haunted house, focusing on unsettling experiences centered around a recliner. Multiple individuals report feeling a woman's presence while sitting in the recliner, especially on the anniversary of the original owner's death.

• Listener Narrative: "It's a long story... the original owner died on December 10, 2021, inside the house." [70:29]

Henry and Ed discuss the phenomenon of haunted objects providing a focal point for supernatural activity, blending skepticism with an appreciation for eerie tales.

• Ed Larson: "No, but I think a recliner is somewhere where ghosts like to hang out. Why wouldn't they want to be comfortable?" [70:34]

---

8. Reflection on Mortality and Future Predictions

Timestamp: [63:45]

As the episode nears its end, the hosts humorously contemplate who might pass away in the coming year, referencing public figures and celebrities.

• Ed Larson: "Mike Tyson." [66:19]

• Henry Zabrowski: "Eddie Redmayne." [66:41]

This lighthearted segment serves as a contrast to the episode's darker themes, showcasing the hosts' signature blend of humor and morbid curiosity.

---

9. Conclusion and Upcoming Events

Timestamp: [76:17]

Henry and Ed wrap up the episode by promoting upcoming live shows, interactions on Patreon, and additional content available on their platforms. They maintain their humorous rapport, thanking listeners and hinting at future storylines and events.

• Henry Zabrowski: "We are going to make it up next year." [77:04]

• Ed Larson: "Hold on a second." [Throughout the closing banter]

The episode concludes on a positive note, encouraging audience engagement and anticipation for future discussions.

---

Notable Quotes:

• Henry Zabrowski: "Little Hobbs is fucking dead." [05:27]

• Ed Larson: "Miss Sunday is hot. I always show Rambo video videos of Miss Sunday. I'm like, look at this." [08:52]

• Henry Zabrowski: "They don't want us to solve. They're not going to let us solve." [27:08]

• Henry Zabrowski: "He's gonna die in there. There's no way he's gonna." [14:31]

• Henry Zabrowski: "It's almost like guys see it in the news and then subconsciously don't understand that they are agreeing with the fathers that are killing their families." [33:08]

• Ed Larson: "He was like, hey, you need to make some soup." [55:04]

• Ed Larson: "Mike Tyson." [66:19]

• Henry Zabrowski: "Eddie Redmayne's going to live to at least 20, 35." [66:56]

---

Final Thoughts:

This episode of Last Podcast On The Left masterfully intertwines dark real-world crimes with eerie supernatural tales, all while maintaining the hosts' characteristic humor and candid dialogue. From the tragic loss of beloved pet influencers to baffling drone conspiracy theories and unsettling Christmas crimes, Henry and Ed provide listeners with a comprehensive and engaging exploration of the season's most disturbing stories.

Transcript

[A]

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There's no place to escape to. This is the last podcast on the left side Stories.

[A]

That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes, eddie, welcome to 2025. You look good.

[B]

I feel bad.

[A]

Yeah. You've been sick.

[B]

I've been sick. I got the bird flu or the new China flu. I got something.

[A]

You got something inside of you. But whatever it is, honestly, I like that it's made you humble.

[B]

Thank you. Yeah. No, I was humble when I was holding my belly in my room. Just don't. You. Please, stay away. Stay away from me.

[A]

Just like the Virgin Mary. I got the Christmas Eve's Eve. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. No, it is interesting how pathetic you can get. You're very sick.

[A]

Well, what's sad is, is how debased a man allows himself to get. Yeah. Is that we. I know I'm other men because I am one of the bravest, strongest survivors that's ever lived through a cold. Or having hurt my toe.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Or having hurt my thumb. And the one thing that Natalie will tell you is that I suffer in silence like a World War II veteran. No one knows that I'm in discomfort. And I never show a sign of weakness.

[B]

Never. Never once. Never, Never been weak.

[A]

No, no, no, no. I make sure when I'm sick, I'm volunteering at the firehouse.

[B]

Oh, absolutely.

[A]

That's what I do. I'm brave. That's different.

[B]

I'm down at the mission.

[A]

I'm built different. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm built different. I am. I'm one of the most incredible husbands has ever been. But honestly, Eddie, I'm glad you're okay.

[B]

Yeah, I finally got the confidence to fart again, which is nice.

[A]

Well, you're afraid you were going to spray or.

[B]

I did. I had a couple. I shut myself twice.

[A]

Welcome to side Stories. And that's how you start 2025. The proper way. I'm your host, Henry Zabrowski. I'm sitting here with your other host, Ed Larson.

[B]

Oh, my bully.

[A]

And he's just Been sick. The one thing I will say, get.

[B]

Sick again this weekend in Atlanta.

[A]

Be good. I hope you do.

[B]

We are coming Atlanta to the Coca Cola cast on the left, Coca Cola Roxy on Saturday. Saturday night, 7pm Come get stinky. And then we're at Dad's Garage on Sunday, but sold out.

[A]

Can't see it.

[B]

Sold out. So you gotta come to last podcast.

[A]

But if I will say, if you're coming to the Dad's Garage show, bring suggestions.

[B]

Yes. Because we're gonna try a little.

[A]

But I will say it's nice to be back in the studio. It's the year 2025. The Jungle Bells are receding. The Jews have thrown their manor in the rivers and the Muslims have gone back to doing whatever they do during the December year.

[B]

Ramadan if you do Ramadan if you don't.

[A]

Last I heard. But now it's time to get in some updates because we're here. The news has not stopped.

[B]

You lost a friend. Can we give him a more. Can we have any, any taps?

[A]

Do you have Sarah McLaughlin's on the arms of the Angel?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Now, I. I like to follow on Instagram, obviously, as as many do. I like to follow. I don't like smart dogs. I don't like skilled dogs. I like an old, shivering.

[B]

Oh, the best dog.

[A]

And it's my favorite follow on Instagram. I like ones that are. They have little legs, malformed faces. I like when they have names like Pips or Mr. Cronkles. That's like some of my favorite stuff. But what no one tells you. I think one of the worst phenomena that no one explains about social media is when a pack, literally several of the little tiny dogs that you follow die.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then I was. So I was watching throughout all of, obviously the Christmas season. I'm filled with anger as normal. And I'm going through them, looking at my favorite little guy, Little Hobbs. Oh, love little Hobbs. Love little Hops. I was looking through all these, you know, his Christmas content again. They're crushing it. Rolling it out three times a week. I can depend upon it. Looking at it right all of a sudden, which I think is hilarious. January 2nd arrives. Yeah, here comes the post. We regret to inform you and the entire little Hobbs family that little Hobbs died before Christmas. So my thing is, is that. So I've been watching Lil Hobbs dance and bark and yip and he's been a fucking corpse.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

For three weeks. And I'm watching this. I'm watching this ghost. It's like watching photos of just because.

[B]

You know, how much are you mad about this?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I mean, I think it's good. I mean, you needed little hops. I did. But this was a stressful time for you.

[A]

Little Hobbs is fucking dead.

[B]

Yeah, little hob. But little Hobbs was dead. And little hops still made you feel delight.

[A]

Yeah, but that was. But now the up, the, the true despair that the moment made me feel sort of obliterated. All of the happiness he provided. It's kind of like how.

[B]

Well, it's January 2nd. You're supposed to feel nothing on January 2nd.

[A]

You're corre. And it was a thankful reminder to remember that 2025 is going to be mean and hard and long.

[B]

Little Hobbs, his owners, masters, they, they, they, they did a good service. And plus they had the content made.

[A]

That's so sad.

[B]

They were like, Hobbs is dying. Put the Christmas sweater on.

[A]

It's November. Get the little hat. We're going to have to go into storage. We're going to have to get their Christmas shit out soon. Yes. Because there are now two tumors in his intestines and we need to get this. We have fucking November 30th.

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

And sold. Honey.

[B]

Yeah, we gotta keep the comic. I respect the fucking commitment.

[A]

No, I do too.

[B]

I'm saying, when should we tell everybody? You know, that was the, that was the talk. They had Hobbs down.

[A]

The first thing is they're just sitting there talking about, probably talking about merch roll outs while they're watching little Hobbs going. And they're just sitting there just being like, you know, we really are going to have to, we're going to have to knuckle down and get. So I know that we all wanted to get that new little Hobbs chess set going and we're having some problems with some Chinese manufacturers, but I think we're gonna have to get that on the double.

[B]

I wonder if, like the vet like takes pride that they put down a famous dog.

[A]

They should have the.

[B]

On there, the wall. We put down little Hobbs.

[A]

Little hops. Only in Los Angeles, man.

[B]

Nos an old dog. I love Norbert.

[A]

He's not long for this world.

[B]

Norbert.

[A]

After watching Lil Hobbs go down, I. Because I also follow Norbert and I.

[B]

Love Norbert and I love Miss Sunday, the black lab. Do you know her?

[A]

No. But the black labs are even harder because, like Norbert will live to a shivering 22 years old.

[B]

I mean, a big dog.

[A]

Norbert's a four, four pound dog.

[B]

Oh, no, we're talking about different.

[A]

That's what I'm saying Sunday.

[B]

Mine's a pitbull, Norbert. But no, the.

[A]

Oh, this is not the Norbert you follow?

[B]

This is not my Norbert.

[A]

Wait a second. Eddie Norber have to talk about this. How is Norbert not suing your Norbert?

[B]

They.

[A]

Look, he typed in Norbert the dog, and the first one that popped up is my Norbert.

[B]

Really, man? Maybe I think it's targeted at me. And I started like, it's just some old lady that puts a hat on their pit bull and she drives it around. She's like, hey, Norbert, want some ice cream? What's the ice cream, Norbert? Norbert's just sitting there like not even paying attention or knowing what's happening.

[A]

The problem with the bigger dog influencer, that's my Norbert. Really cute. But the bigger dog influencers, they do die faster.

[B]

Oh, absolute.

[A]

And that is the worst.

[B]

And Sunday, the black lab, she's retired now. They said that she's. She's not. She's not dead. But she is. But she's hot.

[A]

Not dead, quote unquote. So they had to say.

[B]

I got it.

[A]

She's not dead.

[B]

No, I know. No. Well, they said she's retiring from social media. And I bought a calendar for Julie for Christmas and for my dog, nanny Max.

[A]

This is what little Hobbs learn. The dog never dies. The dog retires.

[B]

Ms. Sunday's hot. I always show Rambo video videos of Ms. Sunday. I'm like, look at this.

[A]

Oh, you're talking about the dog.

[B]

I'm talking about.

[A]

Yeah, okay. The older African American lady that owns them.

[B]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The dog is a. Yes, yes. Yeah. And these are the calendars I bought when we have one up in my house. It's not too late to get your Miss Sunday calendars. Go out there to Miss Sunday, the black lab. But she dresses. Sometimes she dresses like a bus driver.

[A]

I can't believe.

[B]

And then other times she dresses like she works at the DMV. That's very cute. That's very. I love Ms. Sunday.

[A]

Well, I'm glad she loves her baths. Well, now we're just talking about dogs and I think it's very sweet. It's very sweet.

[B]

Taking it, bringing in the new year, talking about these old ass dogs. My dogs are still alive. Your dogs are still alive?

[A]

Oh, yeah. No, Carmi still alive. Even though she went into underneath the tree. She found my mom. In all of her generosity. My mom does this thing.

[B]

She's still feeding Gracie May from the grave.

[A]

She be. She does A little. And I don't mean. I mean this with all love. She's becoming slightly like an Aunt Bethany from National Lampoons Christmas vacation, where she is just wrapping stuff. And so we did not know she had wrapped a bar of dark chocolate underneath the tree. And Carmi, who's a little Britney Murphy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

She is becoming in love. She loves anything that can kill her. And so she goes.

[B]

Oh, yes, getting that lace baby oil.

[A]

And so she goes. And she found the. The bar of chocolate. She waited. She literally had probably located it before Natalie stepped out. I mean, this. She went under the tree while Natalie was gone for 10 minutes, ate the bar chocolate. Then thousands of dollars later, just got to. Got to be confused in a day in a urgent care.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

No idea. But she lived.

[B]

When you wrap candy, it goes in the tree or in the stocking.

[A]

Don't wrap candy.

[B]

Don't wrap candy.

[A]

Just give candy.

[B]

Just give candy.

[A]

Just give candy. Right?

[B]

Yeah. But don't put it under the tree. The dogs will get.

[A]

But speaking of dogs are sick, Ed. Sick. I'm not. I'm invulnerable. I actually think that Tron, honestly, I'm the best I've ever been. I feel that I'm only getting stronger, funnier, more handsome, fatter, balder, Bulking. I'm bulking. I'm bigger, muscly. I did. I. I benched. I double. I double dumbbell bridge. 45 pounds the other day with two hands the other day, 45. And he chance each hand for me.

[B]

Really?

[A]

That was big for me.

[B]

Can you curl 45?

[A]

I can curl 35. Whoa.

[B]

That's very. I don't think I could do that.

[A]

No. I'll kill any other podcaster that tries to fuck with me.

[B]

I don't think that's true at all.

[A]

Oh, no. I'll come get him.

[B]

There's so many podcasters that just eat.

[A]

Liver, you know, it's just fun to do. I like to challenge them with fights.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because they never get any. They never get any attention. Now let's talk about some couple of great, great updates.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Immediately.

[B]

Freedom.

[A]

Freedom. Now, our guy, one of our favorite guys here, Father of the year, Joseph Fritzel. Now, he's been in jail. He's 89 years fine. And he's still in Austria's what now it's been the psychiatric detention in this high, high security unit, essentially in a home for the criminally insane. But they've been floating that he might get paroled.

[B]

How long has he been locked up?

[A]

He has been locked up since. What Was that day? 2009.

[B]

2009.

[A]

And so he. So now. But he's saying straight up, first of all, he doesn't understand the big hubbub. He doesn't know why everybody's still so upset with him. Because according to him, I was actually a good father. Moreover, he claimed I specifically saved money to help with children's education. I visited the children often and helped them whenever they were given Charles to do. I helped them and encouraged them to play musical instruments and so forth. I know with one of my daughter I made a mistake and I regret that. But apart from that, I believe that I was actually a good father. That is a direct quote from Joseph Fritzel for those of you don't know. He made a family with his daughter. He created a sex dungeon that she was put inside of. And then he made a secret family in there. It didn't go well for him. Now he's a jail. But they're saying that he might get parole. And he has insisted he needs a house of the basement. And I. It is what he says.

[B]

Is that true?

[A]

It is the first thing he said that he says that number one, he says he no longer feels comfortable driving. It's the traffic and everybody's on their phones. He's. He's not happy with driving. And he says that he needs the. He must have a residence near a train equipped with a basement. And that's what he says. His attorney Astrid Wagner told local medium every day he dreams of having his own house or apartment. See, but he must have a belt. It must have a basement because he says he has so many files.

[B]

Oh, he needs to keep all so many files. Yeah, well, you can't keep those above ground.

[A]

Yeah, but you know, tell me about this because I just watched that. I seen clips from that movie Baby girl.

[B]

Oh yeah? Did you?

[A]

Sex movie.

[B]

I know, the Nicole Kidman movie. Her disclosure.

[A]

But the whole thing I see now is because that big. That song, it's like a famous song from. And this gets a big sexy moment, just him coming down to the basement to hear I will be your father figure. You know, like, you see that I could see him coming in all six.

[B]

What if they put him in the basement of the prison? Wouldn't that work?

[A]

He doesn't want to be in the basement. He just wanted. He was a have a basement.

[B]

He wants to have a basement. Yeah.

[A]

He doesn't want to be other people in the basement. Daughters go in basement.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

Fathers are in the living room.

[B]

He should be in prison. At least as long as he kept his daughter. Daughter in prison.

[A]

He's gonna.

[B]

At the bare minimum, it's too late.

[A]

He's gonna die in there. There's no way he's gonna. They're all. Basically.

[B]

They're not letting him out.

[A]

Not really. They're. They're saying that essentially he's gonna be moved to a lower security prison, but they think that the idea of total freedom is not gonna happen.

[B]

How long did they give him when he got sentenced?

[A]

I forgot what the sentence was. They tried. You remember. It was. Oh, it was kind of like Anders Brevik, I believe. It was like one of those. They, like, put him in jail and they're like, we'll figure this out later. Oh, because it's one of these countries where they don't know. Like, it's just a very liberal country.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, Life imprisonment with the possibility of parole after 15 years. Yeah. So now it's 15 years.

[B]

All right.

[A]

So he's like, he's allowed. He's allowed. And so. Yeah. So, yes. Hey, hey. Come on. I was hearing about these pelotons I would like to use. I hear they do anything too well to the screen and it takes you anywhere. And I would like to ride my bike along my daughter's naked body. Well, that's different. Yosef, you can't do it. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all in one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. You make a website, you use the website. Succeed. Thanks, Squarespace. Now that I found the little boy that now is running the horse picks empire, I am angry with the way that he is handling it. A lot of these horses, honestly, it's subpar and a lot of it's pretty lazy. The current J.D. vance horse that they just put a beard on is honestly, as far as I'm concerned, extremely, extremely offensive to me as a person with a former bearded face. So that's why I have started my own new website. Thanks to squarespace, destroy horsepix.com because the goal is to go after this rogue child that took my dream and perverted it. And ha. And the only entity that can help me in my search for revenge against this one childlike entrepreneur, Squarespace. Check out squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're Ready to launch squarespace.com left to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. I'm coming for you, Charlie Bucket. You say you'll learn a new language each year, but few actually follow through. You have no discipline. You can't change your life for the better. Hmm, sad. But Babbel makes it easy for you to learn one in less time than you think. Isn't that better? Making it easy? Babbel's 10 Minute Lessons, created by over 200 experts, help you start speaking a new language in three weeks or at your own pace, with a focus on practical, real world conversations. It makes learning to communicate easy and effective, much like I can learn how to say foul, which means lazy in German because that's what you are, you dogs, after New Year's. So make yourself unlazy unfair by getting yourself Babel and learn a new language. Right now, let's get more of you talking in a new language. Babel is gifting our listeners 60% off [e-mail] left get up to 60% [e-mail] left spelled B A B-V E L.com left babel.com left rules and restrictions may apply. Get a head start on your financial goals for the new year with the help of Mint Mobile. Mint Mobile lets you maximize your savings with plans starting at $15 a month when you purchase a three month plan. All Mint Mobile plans include high speed data, unlimited talk and text on the largest 5G network. And you can keep your phone and number. I love the amount of money that I've saved for Mint Mobile so much it has allowed me to purchase my own Boston Dynamics protection dog that I've outfitted with a cute rifle's head with little ears on it. And he barks going stop police. Stop police. Stop police. He's so cute. And we went and we got his DNA done and it turns out he's 100% killer robot. Which is honestly, I would not have had that money to do the testing if I didn't save so much money with Mint Mobile. To get this new customer offer on your new 3 month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to mint mobile.com lpotl that's mint mobile.com lpotl Cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at mintmobile.com lpotl $45 upfront payment required. Equivalent to $15 per month new customers on first 3 month plan only speed slower above 40 gigabytes on unlimited plan. Additional taxes, fees and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details. Second update Big well yeah.

[B]

What's going on with these things, man?

[A]

Well, drones. I'm not even, I'm not even going to start talking about the drones.

[B]

Oh, because you're gonna be just like them.

[A]

No.

[B]

You're keeping it a secret. You're not telling anyone about nothing.

[A]

No, it's just that it seems.

[B]

What are you hiding?

[A]

The wave has passed. Honestly, I think it's a pre diabetes. I think I'm gonna be diagnosed with prediabetes. That's what I'm hiding. But what I am not hiding is the fact that the story has now as we knew it would eventually go. It has drifted past. We are now past it. We're now new. Now we're just in Trump nonsense zone, which we're going to be for the next four years. And it's gonna be a lot like that. So one thing that did right. Yes. So far the official statement, the last that we heard from the US government was they said. We assessed that the sightings to date include a combination of lawful commercial drones, hobbyist drones and law enforcement drones, as well as manned fixed wing aircraft, helicopters and stars mistakenly reported as drones. Definitely because we're fucking stupid. And the Jacob Weinling, another guy whose reporter he worked, he believes that the drones are a part of this. The $1.5 trillion drone air tax program rollout. Which I get. I don't think. I don't think the way to start the air taxis is to make everybody afraid of them and not know what they are. Yeah, I think that mostly if you want a. Yeah, you like check out the air taxi. It's totally safe.

[B]

Like this is like the thing you do, like the World's Fair, you know, you bring it out. Yeah. Jules Verne's hologram to introduce it.

[A]

I don't think we need to fool us. I think that we just would either take the air taxis or not. I know that in LA we're supposed to be taking air taxis to the olympics maybe in 2020.

[B]

That's right. We're gonna see. You have three years from now we're gonna be taking air taxis.

[A]

All I know is what am I gonna do? Am I gonna take some air taxi? And it's gonna be some guy named like Tree Jor and he's gonna be like, I'm actually also a dj and he's gonna hand me his headshots. Is it gonna be the same?

[B]

It's gonna be the same. Yeah. It's never. It's not someone's first job.

[A]

Yeah. I can't.

[B]

What else? What do you really do?

[A]

This is like actually I'm making slime for children. It is my favorite. I make slime. It's here if you want some Slime. I have a bunch, kid now. They also say, so nothing's really come out. What? I. I do have a letter again. But what about the orbs?

[B]

What do they say about the orbs?

[A]

Absolutely nothing, Eddie. Those are again, stars. You're an idiot.

[B]

So many times I will say that. There was a couple times where I was like, you know, I'd get drunk, and you're like, oh, yeah, that's right, drones. And I go outside and I start staring at the sky, and I got my star finder out, you know, And I'm like, is that a drone? Dodge Star, Ursa Major, you know, like, sitting there. And then, like, I'm like, oh, that one's two stars. That's gotta be a drone. I was like, oh, no, I'm drunk.

[A]

I forgot.

[B]

That's not two stars. I just can't see right now, Eddie.

[A]

You know what, though? These are the beginnings of a true investigator. That's where it all begins.

[B]

You never remember to check when you're sober. Why would you?

[A]

Because when you're sober, you're doing something.

[B]

Like, where the fuck are these drones?

[A]

I gotta do something about the sky.

[B]

I gotta get outside.

[A]

There's something out there I gotta do something about, and my wife doesn't want me to do something about it. Yeah.

[B]

It's never when Julie's home that I'm looking for drones. I was like, when she's gone too long. Yeah, of course. Hold on a second.

[A]

Yeah, because what are you doing with your. You're sitting at home with your beautiful wife, watching television with your dog. You're not searching for the truth.

[B]

My life is good. In that moment when my life is empty, I'm like, all right, let's go find the aliens.

[A]

Truth and love go like this. Inside of the male mind. Truth and love go back and forth. Truth will eventually destroy love, but for a while, love does help tamper down the effects of truth. But according to this licensed drone operator.

[B]

If you didn't have Natalie, you'd be off the road. You'd be done. You like, trying to, like, go to space?

[A]

I mean, honestly, I don't even think about what it'd be like if I was truly untethered and just how much damage I could cause on how much fun that would be for me and how good it would be for America. Think about that.

[B]

Think about that.

[A]

You know, because she doesn't listen.

[B]

Right?

[A]

The key, really, is to go through divorce, which is what we all will talk about. A couple of big, divorced energy guys in today's episode that we're going to talk about. That's when I can really start focusing on my plants. But according to this licensed drone operator, I'm a licensed drone operator in eastern South Dakota with two separate drone sightings. I regularly operate a DJI Agras T50.

[B]

That means nothing to me.

[A]

It's a thing. It's a drone, which is one of the largest commercial drones available to the public. After looking at a ton of New Jersey drone footage, I can say that there's no way that they are legally flying commercial drones. If they are drones, and they are significantly more advanced than anything we've seen, Battery life on large drones is extremely limited. And even if the drone is just hovering with minimum wind, you got maybe 15 to 20 minutes before it automatically tries to land due to low battery. Add windy conditions and you're looking at 10 minutes of flight time. Additionally, in my experience, the battery used in these drones are very sensitive to temperature and you see a significant drop in battery efficiency in colder weather. That's fascinating that I did not know. Look at this thing. Yeah, it's a big old. That's a big old drone this guy flies. I also don't see how these flights can be legal. The FAA is very strict rules about operating large drones over populated areas. Drones are also legally required to transmit a radio frequency ID at all times while airborne, so air traffic control and pilots of man aircraft can be aware of them. The New Jersey drones apparently do not transmit an RFID and their operators are not communicating with air traffic control or pilots of local aircraft. Now this guy, he said he had two sightings. First sighting was over the Volga, South Dakota on December 11, 2020.

[B]

South Dakota, Volga. Oh, Volga, Volga.

[A]

Which is a woman named Gurnkas Vulgas. What you call it? Her vulgar. Now, I saw what looked like an airplane with red and green running lights and a bright white light that looked kind of like a spotlight. I thought it was plane flying low over town for some reason until I noticed the object was hovering in place. I also saw it turn off its white spotlight and it had no flashing anti collision lights which were required on all aircraft. The object turned and hauled us out of town before I could get a video. Second sighting on December 15, 2024 at about 8:10pm Three of us saw four to six yellow orange lights flying in a circular pattern in the sky west of AR Arlington, South Dakota. They would come in and out of view almost like fireflies in the dark, but definitely flying in a circular pattern. Their movement was almost floaty and they Turned too tightly and flew too closely to be standard aircraft. They also didn't have anti collision lights which are standard and required on all man and unmanned aircraft. We watched for about 10 minutes until we got cold and then we went inside. Okay, but. So that's one of those. I'm gonna leave it for now. I will see what happens. And this is going to develop drones.

[B]

I mean like. All right, so what about like the big drones like Obama's drones, the flying.

[A]

Murder robots, his children, his babies.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like those drones exist, you know those things could fly across oceans, right?

[A]

No. I don't know. No, they get deployed.

[B]

They get deployed, but they're not. They're up in the air. Those are military grade.

[A]

Those are military grade. And it's different because they're also there on, there are unmanned. It's just different.

[B]

But weren't we worried that some of these were military grade drones?

[A]

Well, they weren't, weren't killing us, they weren't bombing us. So we don't know what they were doing. Yeah, and a lot of our. We also made things that I believe we make drones. They look like this. You see these things? They look like planes.

[B]

Yeah, no, that's what I'm, that's what I'm talking about.

[A]

Yes. What? These, this is very different. These fly very, very, very high up. And what they do is they identify where to go. And then there's the strafing drones that come in and shoot the missiles.

[B]

But the thing is, if you wanted the drones to be secret, why would you put lights on them?

[A]

It's a whole thing.

[B]

Why would you have lights?

[A]

Well, because they got it. Because the other drones got to see you. This, it's going to be a mystery that we are not going to solve. They're not going to let us solve.

[B]

They're not going to. It's just going to be the Phoenix lights all over again.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And it's never going to explain it and we're just going to talk about it every once in a while.

[A]

Well, it has been explained, Eddie, as we saw my stream on our stream and all this. Nothing's happening. Nothing's going on. We're stupid. Everything that people see is stars or planes. And you got big fat dumb drunk eyeballs and you have little feet and dumb.

[B]

I have big feet, thank you very much. I'm size 13 shoe. If anybody wanted to buy me shoes, send him shoes. Send me shoes. I'm walking around like Fred Flintstone.

[A]

Yes, yes, he really is. It's very strange. And here you can hear his, his soul scrape on the tile. So that's one update. We'll just leave it, let's leave it behind for now and then this next update is. This is one more shade to this mystery that does not make sense.

[B]

We live for stories about shit in the road.

[A]

It's not just because, you know, it's stuff attached to shit in the road. And also kind of funny I think in a way how in small town America the road is almost a way to communicate.

[B]

That's the only way you can talk to anyone.

[A]

Seems to be between the fucking piles of stuff, all that kind of stuff. It just seems to be people choose roads.

[B]

So yeah, maybe this guy in Kansas just needed to make friends.

[A]

Well sound like he wanted, he did want to make some friends, but. But we don't know what he wanted to do with those friends. Now this is an update to our story out of Bennington, Nebraska where they say at least according to the last report, four accidents occurred. I believe it's on highway Route 36 at night where an object is left in the middle of the road. Some one person said, they said a flat screen TV there was a bike.

[B]

That's a hard thing to see in the middle of the night in the road.

[A]

It's almost like you purposely did it so they crash into it.

[B]

But if you. He wants them to swerve, right?

[A]

Don't know know. So what happens is, is that this happened now several times in this small little town where the car.

[B]

I wish there was like more like the TV was set up and there was like road on the TV like he's widely coyote.

[A]

And so people swerve to avoid the objects in the road. But next thing they know they hear a voice that is asking if they need help. And now this happened four times and several other people, two of them happen to be connected. They noticed that it was the same exact man that seemed to have been parked next to the highway waiting for them to crash. Yeah, we don't know what they did. All everybody refused. He also said he was weird. Look, it was kind of a normal white guy, whatever, right?

[B]

Long legs.

[A]

So it was long legs. It was long legs. But that. So that was one thing that became a mystery. That was like, all right, it stopped then right before Christmas. A person. We don't know. We are pretty certain it's the person who did this. We don't know right. This one of the victims was by the name of Garrison Beach. All of a sudden first alert 6 the local news in Bennington. One of them, they receive this call as they are talking about the story. Hello, this is Garrison beach and I would like the news article about the accidents on Highway 30 to be removed. This new story does not need to be up there and needs to be removed immediately. So that voice is not Garrison Beach.

[B]

It almost sounded like. I know it was a person, but it almost sounded like it was like.

[A]

AI, I think he just might be a weirdo, Eddie. And so Garrison beach had to go and talk to First Alert 6 and say that's not me. And because they got got. They said it wasn't the one call. They received several calls. And from that voice of that.

[B]

That voice saying it was Garrison beach.

[A]

Saying, it's Garrison Beach. I want you to take this article down. They contacted Garrison Beach. Garrison Beach. He says, no, I did not contact you. They went and they played him the voicemail of the. The person impersonating him. And Garrison beach says like, I don't know. Honestly, I don't know what to say this or not. But sounds just like the guy. So this guy is trying to get the stories taken off the news about this. So it's either.

[B]

Did they trace the call?

[A]

No, they can't do that. They don't do that. It was on a voicemail. Voicemail. And so it's. Find it interesting.

[B]

It's one of the first times what number called you?

[A]

I. I don't know. I don't.

[B]

Voicemail. It says it came from this phone number.

[A]

Honestly, I bet you that's the type of information that they probably have to. If they are talking to police that that's what they would give to them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because we don't know. I haven't heard anything. I just heard voicemail. Right. And so, so what they're. But it. It's. I find interesting is that on this news report they're talking a little bit more in sort of like, oh well, maybe this guy just really wanted to help people. Like he really wanted to help people. Which I think is a tactic from the news to get this guy to show himself. Because I don't think that he. I don't think that he's trying to help people. If he's trying to get the news story off the Internet. I think that the man is doing something fucking weird. God knows what it is. We'll find out. Who knows, he could be. Maybe I'm wrong and he'll turn out to be the most benevolent man ever who only wants to be the. He just wanted to work for roadside assistance. And he ever got a chance to. Because he wouldn't get his mechanics degree. Yeah, yeah. Who knows? So that's that story. That's it. That's all we got. We'll see. We'll find some updates on him. So. But now, current news. Eddie, we have got some stories today. So we have Christmas. We have a lot happening, a lot. Which is also four family annihilators. Four. Four. Over the Christmas break. There were four of them. One of them to the last one was, I believe, in Jacob Mayhew.

[B]

This always happens. And.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And then just sometimes it gets swept under the rug.

[A]

I think that Christmas, the holiday season is an extremely stressful time. And I think that we see a lot of uptick in suicides and in stuff like this. Family annihilations is one of those things that seem to. Again, we talked about it right before the show. They come in waves.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's almost like guys see it in the news and then subconsciously don't understand that they are agreeing with the fathers that are killing their families and they get inspired to kill their families.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Which is. I say, honestly, take them to Disney and leave them.

[B]

Well, that's very expensive.

[A]

Or drive them someplace and leave them.

[B]

Yeah. Knott's Berry Farm.

[A]

Always leave.

[B]

Yeah. Family annihilators. Don't go to Disney, please.

[A]

Before we do that. But before we do Christmas crimes, there was a more obviously more important crime that happened that we kind of want to talk about is the similarities and the. The differ between what happened in New Orleans on New Year's Eve.

[B]

Terrifying.

[A]

And what happened in what happened in Vegas on New Year's Eve. Now we know that two separate, I would say close to domestic terrorist events happen that were extremely similar. One was in New Orleans where car drove through. Was an electric truck drove through.

[B]

Much more extreme than the other one.

[A]

Much. Yes. Really, really fucked up. He drove through a crowd on Bourbon street. He killed 14 people. 35 people have been hurt so far.

[B]

This is a man, people. But you. I mean, what do we do?

[A]

It's not good. Yeah. Either way, it's not good. About 15 people are dead. Sam. Sudden Jabbar was the name of the man who did it. We know that he was inspired by isis. He's a former military vet.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He again rented an EV truck, did all the EV truck, and then he got into a shootout with the police and he died in the shootout.

[B]

He was waving an ISIS flag.

[A]

He was. The only thing is, and we had talked about this right before the show, like, how do you get one?

[B]

Yeah. Where do you get an ISIS flag.

[A]

Rob, could you look that up?

[B]

Can you?

[A]

Because we were googling before. We were trying to find out.

[B]

I figured that on into a microphone. Out of just fewer curiosity.

[A]

How did you buy an ISIS flag?

[B]

Podcast on the left is just curious.

[A]

Not to buy and I want to.

[B]

Know if it exists.

[A]

Etsy can't. Etsy. Interesting.

[B]

A good choice.

[A]

Wow. You went to Etsy.

[B]

Yes. For ISIS flags. Wow.

[A]

You can buy an isis. I don't know. I don't think.

[B]

No, there's. It's so not me. Yeah, no, I. What do you do? Do you just take a black cloth and throw a bunch of white out at it?

[A]

They can't hold.

[B]

It works.

[A]

Do you think they all get made or they get made in Taiwan or something? Something. Yeah. Right. They're not doing this on. I feel like there's a.

[B]

When are we inviting ISIS to the Olympics?

[A]

Yeah, it's so. I mean, they want to be in it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This is what happens when you search and Google to try to.

[B]

It just goes full.

[A]

Wow. It just won't even let us look at it. We're just trying to look at it.

[B]

Well, even. Well, it doesn't even show you the.

[A]

Because you're on Google shopping. Yeah.

[B]

Oh my God. The first thing that comes up is FBI.gov. oh, Jesus. Amazon. All right. Yeah, type it in.

[A]

Type it in. Amazon. Get one.

[B]

Bezos make B. If anyone's sending me one, it's. It's. Oh, isis.

[A]

Oh, he's got a isis. And you have an LGBTQ you can buy.

[B]

Yeah, no, buy that. You can buy an Iraqi.

[A]

No.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

You have to make it, I guess, man.

[B]

Did I ever tell you about. So when I did USO on Christmas and it was. It was Christmas Eve and we're on the base in Baghdad doing the show and then there's these two Iraqi like super soldiers there watching the show and they were like big and tough and crazy. They look totally different because they're Iraqi super soldiers and they're just standing like, like with their arms crossed underneath the hoop and. And I'm sitting there and by the chairman of the joint Chief of staff. And then after the show, the. These two guys from the Iraqi military go up to the chairman of joint chief of staff and he reaches it in his pants pocket and he pulls out a crumbled up flag and he hands it to the general and it's an. And it's an is. He opens it up and it's an ISIS flag that he captured yesterday. And like that he killed people For. And the general said, thank you. And then General Dunford batted. And then he. And then he crumbled it up. The general crumbled it up and put it in his pocket. And it was like the craziest exchange. There was no one, no press, no one took pictures. It was just something I just kind of saw.

[A]

And I was like.

[B]

I was like, holy fucking.

[A]

So do you have to pay your dues to isis? And then you get a flag and like a certificate and a polo and a lanyard.

[B]

I'm sure they love sending them, you know, like, I'm sure they got, you know, I got a bunch of. I got a bunch of biggest baby shirts at the house. I don't know what to do with. Yes, I could imagine ISIS put in a big order because you got to get. You got to order.

[A]

We have to get rid. These things are just sitting everywhere. We got to get these boxes.

[B]

Old merch. We're trying. We can't get rid of.

[A]

Yeah, we gotta get these boxes out of here. How else am I. Where am I gonna put my pimple machine collection?

[B]

The. The American. And see if we can.

[A]

Hi, my name is Tim Isis. And one thing I gotta say is these flags are choking me. All right, just take them. Just use them. All right? Honestly, just use them as a tablecloth. It doesn't matter, man. No, they are. So that was. That was a bad one, right?

[B]

So we still don't know where to get an ISIS flag.

[A]

No side stories.

[B]

LPOTL gmail.com we're going to have to.

[A]

Do it the old fashioned way. That's what I think. Don't send us.

[B]

I mean, did you see him available isis, man. The sequel to Al Qaeda. Those still around.

[A]

Still around. And so what do you think the T is?

[B]

The Taliban, Al Qaeda and isis, they're like, are they connected?

[A]

Eddie, please, for the love of Christ. This is not the show.

[B]

This is not our show.

[A]

None of us have any idea. I don't know. Rob doesn't know.

[B]

Perfectly. I've stayed out of it.

[A]

Yeah. I mostly am just hopes and prayers. Thoughts.

[B]

Thoughts and prayers.

[A]

Vibes.

[B]

To who?

[A]

To the Middle East.

[B]

To the Middle East. All of it.

[A]

My goal is the Middle East. May they each find their way.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Towards peace.

[B]

It's always been good over there. And I don't know why. Why. Just recently it's getting stirred up also.

[A]

LastPodcastLeft.com we will be doing our first live show in Jerusalem. It will be on Easter Sunday. And just please come and join us over there. It is Going to be a barn burner. So that's. That was. So that was like. That's the obviously truly up.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And the other one is this cyber truck guy. Now we know this. This charmer, a man by the name of Matthew Livelsberger.

[B]

He was very similar to the other guy. Minus the isis.

[A]

Not only. It was extremely similar. They're both military, they're both vets. One thing though is that with the NOLA bomber, with the NOLA driver, the truck attack, he was. He was in the U.S. army. And we know that he was radicalized from the way in. He was middle and he. There. Something like that. But when it comes to Matthew Livelsberger, same shit, but a wholly different scenario. He also rented an electric truck. He rented the cyber truck. Right. He then also army of the Vet, but he was Green Beret. Yeah. Main difference between Matthew Livelsberger and this other guy was the fact that he had a massive brain injury. It changed his entire personality that everybody says. They all said that he was a different guy after he had.

[B]

And he got divorced. Both of them.

[A]

This is what I'm saying. Divorced men's energy we are all going to have to protect ourselves from in 2025.

[B]

Yeah. Because there's going to be a lot of divorces this year. I got a feeling.

[A]

I have a feeling. I am working. I love my wife. I'm doing everything. I'm. I am.

[B]

I think we're in the clear.

[A]

We're. And so I. But we are doing our best. We're going to do our best as men. But these guys like this is the problem with giving a man his freedom in this way.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Is that it really sets him out there. So Matthew Livelsberger, he was. He got divorced. And one of the weirder things.

[B]

Do you think he was just upset because he won the Brian Thompson lookalike contest?

[A]

God, that is a bad contest to fucking win. Dude. Did you know that actually if you win that the prize you get is a target on a shirt? Now can we keep it, Rob?

[B]

Can we keep it, Rob?

[A]

Yeah. No.

[B]

So Matthew know that you were going to be a moral barometer for the rest of your life? Yes.

[A]

Yes, he did. Now. Now he knows. So one of the things I found that was curious about Matthew Livelsberger is that not only so he was divorced, you know, he's let loose. He decides to rent this cyber truck from Turo, which is again great. I love that all the Turo. He also.

[B]

I never heard of this company at all.

[A]

Same with the NOLA truck attack guy. He also rented his truck from Turo. And everyone's like. I was like, this is the worst ad campaign I've ever heard for a.

[B]

Car rental for fucking terrorists.

[A]

And so Matthew Livelsberger, he rented the cybertruck. Now you have all of these reporters. So he drove it. I believe he drove it from Las Vegas, from Colorado to Las Vegas. Had to charge it fucking twice.

[B]

Yes, exactly.

[A]

Exactly. Main fucking problems with the cybertruck truck he drives to Vegas in order to. We now know he detonated his cyber truck after he put a gun in his mouth and blew his brains out. He blew up the cyber truck in front of Trump Tower. Now you have every Monday morning quarterback reporter starts ripping through this story, going to being like. You could see the symbolism. Looks.

[B]

I mean, it's day you see Trump Tower, it's cyber truck, screaming assemblies.

[A]

See, this is a problem, soldier. But then when you look into Matthew. Ls huge Trumper, huge fan of Elon Musk, and what you find out is that these people, let's just say, Eddie, they might be kind of ignorant about everything in a way that they did not know that he went to go do this because he thought Trump was cool. Elon Musk was cool.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And that everyone would like this. I think.

[B]

Yeah. He got the cybertruck because he really wanted to drive it.

[A]

Well, this is the. This is actually true, is that he drove out there and he was texting his ex, like, fuck buddy. Like, it's somebody he dated before. He was like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

And it might have even been like, someone that he was cheating on his wife with or something.

[A]

She says that he came back out. Right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And that just so. But what he was doing. So Matthew Livelsberger, he was. He was texting his ex girlfriend as he was driving. All he was texting was how cool the cybertruck truck was. And the cybertruck's awesome video of him showing her how fast the cyber truck could go.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And the whole time she's sending texts back.

[B]

Like, you ever get texts like that? That person's probably about to kill anybody.

[A]

Who says, I feel like Batman is in a bit of a mania. Because that's what he texted her. He texted her, I feel like Batman. But you know what the main difference between him and Batman is? Several billion dollars. And you're not Batman. You're stupid.

[B]

Fuck.

[A]

He's just rented a cybertruck like an id and his parents are still alive.

[B]

I'm more like Batman than he is.

[A]

Let's just rob. 1, 2, 3. More like fat man. Now. Let's just clean. Come on. Come on. Now, Matthew Silver, that. This is the. This is the problem is that anytime you think a. Especially in these day and ages, I think that people think that something's like, really, like, way more complicated than it is. We want these guys to have more depth. Depth than they do. So he came out. He. Matthew Livelsberger, he wrote. He had suicide notes that were. He was criticizing the government and all. Whatever. Just kind of, to be honest. Hack shit.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Then you have. He. You know, he was. Made a whole big deal about, but he was mostly concerned. The reason why, like, everyone was like, man, this means something. He went to Trump Tower. It's like, no, he just wanted it to be on the news.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I believe he just wanted to be on the news. He knew he did it in front of Trump Tower in Vegas. He would absolutely get on the news. And he got the cybertruck because he wanted to test the cybertruck and you could tell from all of the content he made from within it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

As he was driving and just like, also his ex.

[B]

Girl on your way to commit suicide, and you're still like, I need to put this content out, people.

[A]

Or. Well, he wasn't putting online. He was just sending it to his ex girlfriend.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And so when he was driving across the country, he just was. Well, they say this a lot with people that have decided to commit suicide. They would. Their attitudes will.

[B]

Yeah. They reach euphoria in a weird way.

[A]

Because they've now, like, made a decision about what to do. So it seemed that he decided to do a. I'm gonna let my hair hang down. I'm gonna drive a cybertruck to Vegas and then not party in Vegas. First of all, you didn't party at first. Like, you should. At least the Al Qaeda pilots went out and fucking went to a strip club. Help the economy a little bit. Yeah. I mean, you mean to tell me I gotta go out there and do something?

[B]

He didn't do anything.

[A]

Nothing. I don't think so. Well, he's. But it's mostly just. Just know this, ladies. This is like, same thing we talk. We talked about with the micropenis. Same thing with the cyber truck. All you got to say, oh, cool. That's it. That's all they want to hear. All a guy with you. All. A guy with a cybertruck just wants to hear. It's like, if you go up to me like, wow, this is a really cool car. You've saved one family from being annihilated. You saved one public space from being detonated with a handmade fertilizer bomb. If you just, just. We got. This is 2025. This is reaching across the A. I'm.

[B]

Going the other way, man. I'm sorry. I'm never getting in one. I've like, if someone pulls up to pick me up in a. In a cyber truck, I'm just gonna be like, you know what? I'm fine.

[A]

You know, I. I will say some of Matthew Livelsberger did make the truck look pretty fun.

[B]

But I mean of course it's fun. It's just.

[A]

It was so fun. I'm so anti cyber truck. I'm anti cybertruck. But when I was watching the texts, he said his ex cough and I was like, oh wow. I just want to go. Also like one thing that she did, she was just like. He was like. Cuz she was also asking a bunch of disinterested questions. Cuz obviously he sounded manic. So she was asking him a bunch of dis. Sounded like disinterested questions. One was like, how fast does it go? And he's like unworldly.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. It's very, very sad.

[A]

But then he went to go blow himself up in front of Trump Tower and then he just got exactly what he wanted. Is that we just talked about him. So is this again, this like reached out to your divorced buddies this year? This is it. Reach out. This is the goal.

[B]

Well, he also what his statement was about like the military. Right.

[A]

You know, he and all that.

[B]

I mean like it's. It's. It's an epidemic.

[A]

Well, it's soldiers.

[B]

What is it? Like it's over. Like it's like 20 a day.

[A]

You are correct in terms of the utterly. Yeah. In terms of the suicide rate for soldiers are huge. Anybody being military, it's very, very big.

[B]

They do. They're out there in VA parking lots killing themselves trying to make point just so people talk about it at least. You know, maybe this guy like took it to the next level.

[A]

Well, I think the problem is that when you look at it, it was a mismatch of. He had a brain injury. He was not the same. Matthew Livelsberger obviously dealt with quite a bit in the military and as a Green Beret, he probably saw quite a bit of action. He then came back out. I think that he was. He had a brain. His brains were scrambled. Yeah, his brains were scrambled. He didn't know what he was doing. And then he wrote a whole long conspiracy theory about the New Jersey drones were like Chinese Military.

[B]

He know better than anybody.

[A]

No that necessarily technically those Green Beret guys. Maybe I'm wrong on this side stories. LPOTL would know more. It seems that people that are specifically trained to kill are not given lots of information. And I might be wrong.

[B]

Where the people to kill are.

[A]

Yes. I might be wrong. I. And I would actually like to know that for certain. But it kind of seems that they kind of. They divide things up in that way where if your job is to go kill lot they don't want you thinking too much.

[B]

Yeah. You're not intelligence.

[A]

Maybe I'm wrong. I don't know. But. So this is the. It's just wild to see that the stories were immediately. They said that the stories were linked at the NOLA truck attack. And they seem like explosion what they did see. Of course they seem. But I think that they went to.

[B]

The same with Fort Bragg. Fort Bragg, which they probably fucking knew each other.

[A]

And Fort Bragg, I believe also had that shooter. I believe Fort Bragg had that. The. Yeah. Yep. I was also white William Coots Krustker Jr. Also had a shooting in 1995. There's no. There's a lot going on there. Something is what we're gonna. I don't know if what we're gonna see is this, but I find it fascinating that they are parallel but they're completely different.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I think we're gonna see more of stuff like that. I just think that the. The Internet's driving people crazy.

[B]

Oh, absolutely. He's driving people crazy. And everyone's just, you know, these people are up and no one's willing to help them.

[A]

It's because it's I guess a political non. Starter. Yeah.

[B]

And then you see him like a. Whenever you want to go for therapy, you know, and it's drives me crazy.

[A]

I make my therapist call me a.

[B]

That's great.

[A]

But that's just so I can get hard.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Because I can be vulnerable unless I'm hard. So first I must be shame named and then I can be fixed.

[B]

Oh well. There was one fun Christmas story I think I would like to bring up on this show.

[A]

I actually thought that this whole conversation was fun.

[B]

Oh no, it's delight. You know, actually it's surprisingly fun for the content involved, to be honest with you. Shout out Lil Dobbs.

[A]

Lil Hobbs is dead. Little Hobbs is dead.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I had to unfollow little Hobbs.

[B]

Little Hobbs. He put a bunch of fireworks. Yeah.

[A]

I unfollowed little hops.

[B]

You unfollowed little hop?

[A]

He's dead.

[B]

I still follow Wally Gator, even though Wally Gator's dead. And he's still posting, too. I'm still posting old videos of Wally Gator. No.

[A]

It's like, let go. You have to let it go.

[B]

No. I remember Wally forever. Lil Hobbs lives on. Lil Dobbs. Little Hobbs.

[A]

Little Hobbs.

[B]

Little Hobbs lives on. Oh, yeah.

[A]

They still never found Wally, did they?

[B]

No. Wally. Wally's dead. There's no way Wally. Wally's too friendly to make it in a Georgia swap. Hey, everybody. You just got done with the holidays. I know it. You're looking at your bank account and you're like, oh, my God, what happened? Why there?

[A]

Nothing there.

[B]

Why is nothing in my bank account? Rocket Money will help you get on top of everything you need to do to start your year off right. They're gonna help you get rid of all those unwanted subscriptions, monitor your spending, and help you lower your bills so you can grow your savings. It's time to set your New Year's resolutions on course systems. Go. Rocket Money.

[A]

Yah.

[B]

That's right. If it wasn't for rocket Money, I wouldn't have known that I had a double subscription to the same streaming service. It was the one where I was paying for DVDs I wasn't even receiving any more for years. That's right. I had no idea I was spending 6.99amonth for years to get DVDs sent to me for me to return. And I had no clue that I was paying for that and the actual streaming service separately. If I had rocket money, they would have found it for me and they would have canceled it years ago. And I wouldn't have given them an extra 500, $600 over the course. Course of years. They tricked me. I am a fool. And that's because I didn't have rocket Money. Now I have rocket money. Rocket Money. Thank you for putting me in control of my bank account once again. New Year, new me, new wallet. So cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com today. That's Rocket Money.com LPOTL Rocket Money.com LPOTL do yourself a favor and go to the moon, because you're going to have so much extra in your savings and you blow it on a trip to the moon.

[A]

All right, Christmas season is over, but that doesn't mean we don't have Christmas crimes. And there's been there was a bunch of fun Christmas crimes, but they're not really that fun.

[B]

Family there's four family annihilators. We didn't even really talk about it. We just. It happened.

[A]

You know what it is about the family annihilators is that they all end the same.

[B]

Yeah, they really do. Were they. Were any of them done by ladies this time?

[A]

God, I wish.

[B]

Yeah. Never. Never, right?

[A]

Almost never.

[B]

It's got to happen once or twice.

[A]

Every once in a while. Yeah, every once in a while there is. Like, if you look up here. Look up. Yeah. 224. Yeah. The Lawson family murders. That was a big one. That was last year. Okay. No, that was last year. You might have to put 20, 24. Oh, that was. That other one. And then Jason Mayhew was another one. That. That happened recently. That was a teenager, but I think that that guy was. Yeah, the Five Family. That guy. That guy.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

No, you know, there's a lot of them.

[B]

They love it. So, anyway, friendlier topic. Thomas Campbell Bowling Von Gets.

[A]

Isaac Gates.

[B]

Gates, I love this. This guy coming from the New York Post ensured he was placed on the naughty list and in a jail cell this holiday season after he disrupt two separate Catholic masses within a few hours.

[A]

Dude did a double banger, man. The man ruined one mass he could. Didn't get enough.

[B]

He showed up to Holy Angels Catholic Church around 5pm Jesus. Yeah. He just walked in yelling. And then he dropped. He dropped an onion in the aisle.

[A]

You're looking to make some soup.

[B]

He literally had an onion and treated it like a grenade, like he's Farmer's Market Rambo.

[A]

It's your. It's not the only onion I got. I go to the back of the.

[B]

Store and then finally someone's like, all right, get him out of here. And they. They followed him outside. And then when they followed him outside side, he started pelting the man with tangerines before fleeing the city.

[A]

Yeah, here's some citrus. You. Yeah. You want to try to.

[B]

With me.

[A]

You're trying to.

[B]

With me. I know the do family. Yeah.

[A]

Tr. I get the whole produce section in my pockets.

[B]

And then seven hours later.

[A]

Seven hours. So he goes, what do you think happened? Right? So he then goes to midnight mass.

[B]

Or he continues seven hours later, he goes to a midnight mass.

[A]

Hey, everybody.

[B]

Xavier Catholic Church in Leonardtown.

[A]

Did you guys miss my catering from.

[B]

The last Christmas service I was at? He dumped a bunch of whiskey in the holy water.

[A]

Here goes a cocktail. Seasonal cocktail.

[B]

And then he threatened parishioners while he was walking up and down the aisles.

[A]

Did you better me? Did you fucking better me? Not drunk.

[B]

And then the parishioners tackled him at the midnight mass.

[A]

Oh, I'm very good today.

[B]

And then he tried to hit several of them with the bottle of liquor. And then they held him on the ground until the sheriff deputies came. And then they took him to St. Mary's Hospital for medical evaluation.

[A]

Yeah, I'm going to need a look.

[B]

See? And then his mug.

[A]

The mug shot of this next to the full glass of whiskey that they've.

[B]

Decided for next time is so funny. He is, like, straight out of, like, the cast of Philadelphia.

[A]

Dude, he really does look sick.

[B]

Tom is so happy. He's like, just like, I did it.

[A]

I did.

[B]

I'm the one who caused the trouble.

[A]

Look at his face. He's like, ain't I stinker? I'm the king. He just looks naughty. He looks like a naughty little girl.

[B]

What?

[A]

I think little smile.

[B]

He probably, like, lost a bet to his other drunk gay friend.

[A]

And they're like, would you go ruin Christmas over there? Yeah.

[B]

And then he went and he did it. And he's like, how'd it go? And he's like, this is what happened.

[A]

Crushed it. All right.

[B]

I got notes.

[A]

Crashed it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, what do you think? All right, so he's intoxicated.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Starting early. It's Christmas Eve. You say he's with friends. I say, this man hasn't spoken to another person at least a week. Christmas Eve, he wakes up, he decides it's time for everybody. I'm Santa tonight. Right. I always go to Santa. So, like, you think that he'd get enough after first because he has to get the onion and the tangerines. Does he bring them from home or does he go to the store?

[B]

And I just imagine this is what he eats every meal.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

My onions and tangerines. Tangerines.

[A]

Jake and I saw that one ad on Instagram. I'd never be this fit if it wasn't for my onion and tangerine. I will go down. Let me tell Jesus about it. But do you think he gets it?

[B]

Put the man in Manhattan.

[A]

Normally, I wouldn't waste an orange and several tin strings like this, but it's the holidays.

[B]

Also, you're dumping it in the holy water. No one drinks the holy water.

[A]

Why?

[B]

They dip their hands in it.

[A]

I think he was sullying the holy water. Holy water. But I wonder, what does that man do for the seven hours in between?

[B]

I mean, got hammered. I'm sure he got more drunk. Yes.

[A]

Do you think he goes to her Denny's?

[B]

No, no, no, no. He Eats onions. Dangerous.

[A]

Yeah, we've already discussed this. D for me. Go make my mouth hell. Gotta go. He. This. He goes. He gets. I actually applaud him because if I was drunk enough to ruin a Christmas Eve early on. Ass. I definitely would be conked out.

[B]

I remember my mom used to always try to get me to go to Christmas mass, and I'd be like, I'll go if you let me. Boo. And so, like, I'm sure this guy has the same idea. I mean, like, who? You're alone on Christmas. You. Everything in the world.

[A]

Oh, he wanted to go. He wanted to do this.

[B]

You know, the world. The world hates you.

[A]

And oh, yeah, he was going out there to do it. Mr. V. Gates, who is truly the fanciest name of a man that I know that is drunk on Christmas Eve. Thomas Campbell Bowling Von Gates. We he honestly salute you. Next year.

[B]

Yeah. He was charged with second degree assault for throwing tangerines at a man.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

He was also trying to hit people with a bottle.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Disorderly conduct, defacing religious property, religious crime against a group, obstructing a religious exercise, threat of mass violence and disturbing the peace. I didn't know obstructing a religious exercise was a crime.

[A]

I mean, who it up? It sounds like one of those ones. America, man.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Sound like one of the. That's Whatever you should. They should be designed to be. Yeah. Dude, he can't walk into. Well, yeah, whatever. All right.

[B]

Pouring a little whiskey in the goddamn holy water.

[A]

Actually, I do want to ask this. You don't have to pay admittance to go to a church. You don't have to show a license to go into a church. There's no subscription. What law is he breaking walking into the church? Yeah, it's. Maybe If God was real, wouldn't he have stopped him?

[B]

Yeah. If anything, he was giving to the church. He gave food and drink.

[A]

Jesus turned water into wine. That guy turned water into whiskey by pouring whiskey into water.

[B]

Yeah, man, that's easy to do.

[A]

You guys are. I just don't. Because. Yeah, I'm actually incensed about this. There's a crime to. Interrupting a mass is a crime. Threaten people, though. That's different.

[B]

That's what I'm saying. But I mean, obviously, it's Christmas.

[A]

That's different. Yeah. You're in church.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. What do you think God does?

[B]

Yeah, all God does. The whole thing is a threat.

[A]

The whole thing is he can't. You can't gamble. You can't jerk off. You can't curse at Your mother.

[B]

Why do they have all these stupid bird baths sitting in the front of the churches? Fill it with whiskey, dude.

[A]

Fucking. They probably get. Honestly, they probably get more out of the whiskey than the holy water.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This guy should be a saint.

[B]

Saint Vaughn gets.

[A]

I think that St. Von Getz is probably. We'll find out that he's probably. Goats.

[B]

Von. Goats.

[A]

I think that. Well, I believe it's the same goats.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Something German. And then I quickly.

[B]

Thomas Campbell Bowling Von Gu.

[A]

We love you. We. Well, we're. Well, I'm. I like your actions, but I don't know what.

[B]

I'm sure he's unbearable.

[A]

I don't. The man is probably a very difficult human. I don't want him to hurt anyone, but I do think that he can ruin as many masses as he likes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Now this. Now just real quick.

[B]

Are you willing to bail him out?

[A]

Let's see. Is he willing to be my like, own mass interrupter? Can I send him out? Do you become my man? Do you become my chaos agent that I can send out to. To add religion? All I know is, is that this is the energy we're looking for in 2023. Now this is not a long story. I just want to talk about this because this also happened on Christ. Two Oregon men, they died from exposure in a forest after they went out to look for Sasquatch. And Christmas Eve, they went. They got hammered. They couldn't find them. It is. It's literally. It sounds like a parody Christmas song. And they went out and they found him frozen in the snow.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because they were stupid.

[B]

That is the song that we have to write for next Christmas.

[A]

Got frozen looking for Sasquatch.

[B]

Got frozen looking for Sasquatch.

[A]

Looking for a big photograph on Christmas. And also Bigfoot's at home celebrating with his family.

[B]

Yeah. Leave Bookfoot alone on Christmas. If there's one day. Also, you could tell neither of these guys are married.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

There's no woman to be like, you're not going outside on Christmas.

[A]

You don't know what I'm doing.

[B]

This is the one night he thinks he's free.

[A]

You know, honestly, mine was going to hit up my body because normally every. Every Tuesday night we have onions and tangerines together. But he said he was busy, so.

[B]

Yeah. These poor bastards.

[A]

It's just done. It's just. Dumb ass.

[B]

Look for Bigfoot in the summer.

[A]

And unfortunately that's what.

[B]

Also, he's probably hibernating.

[A]

Well, also, Bigfoot celebrates Christmas. Sasquatch actually Jewish.

[B]

Oh, really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, The Yentel Yeti.

[A]

A lot of them converted.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

After World War II, a lot of them converted.

[B]

Oh. So as we start to close out this show, we were debating whether we should talk about this or not, but I figured it's at least worth bringing up. Who do we think is going to die this year? Death Watch 2025.

[A]

2025.

[B]

Now, I know this is tasteless, but we're, you know, it's.

[A]

Well, just real quick. It was mostly just because I was curious and then you talked to me about the deathless.net and I looked it up and Dick Van Dyke is number one with a bullet.

[B]

Number one, yes.

[A]

But I only think that that's just because he's been on the news recently and had to be carried out of.

[B]

His death years more than anyone else on the death list. And so he is number one.

[A]

But my thing is, is that all of these. A lot of these guys make sense. John Williams makes sense. Mel Brooks makes sense. Alan Greenspan makes sense.

[B]

Mel Brooks looks great. I saw Mel Brooks last year. He is not dying this year.

[A]

No, Gene Hackman looks good, but I like to see.

[B]

I don't know. I don't. That's. That's a hell of a statement. I don't think Gene Hackman looks. I don't think he ever looked good.

[A]

He's riding his bike at 95 my grand. My father can't walk from the bedroom to the living room.

[B]

Mel Brooks is 99.

[A]

Yeah. And Frankie Valley, who I've also become obsessed with because I've been watching his new performances and he is just a. He basically performs like an animatronic. It's actually really kind of creepy. He can talk still, but he can't. He could be. He's quite frightening. Watching him perform. He looks like. Like he's been pulled out of a dark ride. But I want to say these are a lot of. Of like. These are all, to be frank. And also big one, number 50 on the list, Stuart hall, sex offender.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

96 years young. Who is he? I don't know. I don't know why that's on this list.

[B]

Stewart Hall. Yeah.

[A]

Why is that?

[B]

Who did he offend?

[A]

Cultural theorist.

[B]

Oh, okay. And he's just known as.

[A]

Now it's just a sex offender on this thing. God knows. Well, I feel like we've just send her. I just feel like we just stepped into a big. The wrong one. This is the multiple Stuart Halls. That's the guy. Yeah. Oh, I can see him. Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

He looks like a sex offender.

[A]

Yeah, he's got that British face too. Friendly. Yeah. Yeah. He looks like a guy who sucks children's feet.

[B]

I want to see the inside.

[A]

Yeah, I see that guy he saw on a game show called it's a knockout.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Of course. And that's what can you only. And I could tell. Look at him. God, what a. What a romantic face.

[B]

David Attenborough, number 27.

[A]

But these are all very. I just want to hear what is your one outlier for the year? And let's see what happens. What's your one outlier?

[B]

Total surprise.

[A]

Who's going to die this year? Let's put some money on it. Total outlier.

[B]

Total outlier. Just random person.

[A]

Someone that you think that could die this year.

[B]

That could die this year.

[A]

That you just be totally random. Totally random. And then we'll see. And then we'll obviously see at the end.

[B]

Mike Tyson.

[A]

Okay. Yeah.

[B]

I could see it happening.

[A]

I could see Mike Tyson. Yeah, sure.

[B]

I can see Mike Tyson going. Yeah, you know, he's. He almost went this year.

[A]

He did. You know, he got really sick.

[B]

He got really sick. And, you know, he's been going too hard and I can see him. I can see him just now just settling down and winding down his life. I could see that. Yeah. Now he's lived hard, too.

[A]

I'm putting money on Eddie Redma.

[B]

Eddie Redmay.

[A]

Still going to put money on it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Just for the sake of it.

[B]

Now, is this money a hit?

[A]

No, Eddie, absolutely not.

[B]

I think Tyson can go this year. Yeah. Eddie Redma.

[A]

He looks very healthy.

[B]

He's going to. Eddie Redmayne's going to live to at least 20, 35.

[A]

He could be sick. He could be very sick. Look at his face.

[B]

He is sick.

[A]

Look at his pinched face.

[B]

He does. Yeah. How does the face get that thin?

[A]

He could be very, very, very sick. I hate his little waist.

[B]

He's a good nurse.

[A]

What?

[B]

Wasn't that the show, the movie he was in?

[A]

No, you're thinking of the other.

[B]

He was.

[A]

Was that the one with the abortions?

[B]

The murderer, the murder nurse, Vera Drake. Oh, Vera Drake dropping. Oh, yeah.

[A]

Remember we played the drinking game?

[B]

Yeah, the Vera Drake drinking game. Every time she says, drop your knickers, you have to drink.

[A]

We did that in college.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then we found out one of the people we had were playing with recently had an abortion.

[A]

She loved it.

[B]

She had a great time.

[A]

She was free to drink.

[B]

Yeah, she drank plenty.

[A]

Now let's get to some listener emails. Yeah. He was in the Good Nurse, that movie. Sucked. Except she got my got my baby in it.

[B]

Who?

[A]

Jessica Chastain. My wife looks like Jessica. My wife looks like J. I would.

[B]

Say my wife looks like Jessica Chest.

[A]

We can't both have that, so.

[B]

Well, she is short. I will say that.

[A]

Jessica Chestname.

[B]

Yes. She short. She is, yeah.

[A]

Isn't she one of those two that says she's older than she or she's younger than she is? She's actually older, but she looks good.

[B]

She's older than us.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Isn't that great? That turns you on more, doesn't it?

[A]

Of course. 47 years young. Looking great. All right, here we go. We got a couple of these listener emails. I think that I'm just going to read one and I'm going to read this the first one on the last one. Okay, this first one is spooky. It's been confirmed now by three separate people, including myself, that my friend's house is haunted. In early August about 1am, I fell asleep on the recliner and living room. I woke up to an incredibly strong feeling of a woman watching me in the hallway that led to the rest of the house. I kept my eyes closed and waited for the feelings to pass, but it didn't. So I opened my eyes to look around to make sure no one was watching me. I went and slep in another room. I chalked it up to having very strong dream and being uncomfortable since my dad had just died a couple days before. I told my friend the next morning, I don't think about it until whatever right? We didn't think about it to the next day. On December 11, 2024, around 8:30pm, he had another guest over who's sitting alone in the same recliner waiting on my friend and his wife to finish their online D and D game on the other side of the house. He said that he felt a feeling of a woman watching him as well and he looked up to see a figure watching him from the corner. He closed his eyes and looked away and looked back and it was gone. It spooked him and he left. My friend's roommate overheard my friend and the guest discussing the situation when my friend's roommate was like holy. I have a story too. The roommate was having stomach problems and decided to leave his room and sleep in the on the recliner. One night he woke to the same feeling and have of a woman watching him in the room. He couldn't specify the direction. However, his incident occurred around 3am they all saying they all kind of of felt this female presence watching. Okay and then they all confirmed it. Same. Same female presence, same recliner. It did. No bad or good feelings, just felt neutral, like it was being. They were being watched. Me and the other fellow had the same exact details, except we couldn't pinpoint where in the room the woman was watching us from. So my buddy and I did some research on the house. The original owner died on December 10, 2021, inside the house. Also, 2024 was a leap year, which means that we added a day onto the year, which meant it should be December 10, 2024. And that was when the aug. Other guests saw her. Figure it was the anniversary.

[B]

Oh, nice. You know, I thought I saw a ghost in a recliner.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I know. I know this story.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You should save this, though. It's a long story.

[B]

Yeah, no, no, but I think. I think a recliner is somewhere where ghosts like to hang out. Why wouldn't they want to be comfortable?

[A]

That's where I like to put my butt ghosts. And by those, I mean my farts.

[B]

It's very spooky. Remember John Moreno had the haunted house that he lived in in from Murder Fist, where he kept seeing, like, burning people.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I forgot all about this tiny house in Tallahassee.

[A]

He'd wake up to see people burning in his bedroom.

[B]

Yeah. Or like he'd get really hot in the house.

[A]

Yeah, that's right.

[B]

And there was. And you open the back door, and it just led to nowhere. And then they found out that it was like a slave quarters.

[A]

We should talk with. We should bring him on to talk about. I forgot about that story. That shit's crazy.

[B]

And then I was. I was back visiting Tallahassee, and then I was driving past the house and needed to burn down again.

[A]

Weird. That's fucking weird. Yeah, I will. I want to talk with John John about that. That'd be great to do for something with the creepypasta. Some creepypasta episode, because he's. That story is very frightening.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

All right, here we go. One last one. I'll take this one with a grain of salt, but this is some of my favorite shit and fates the planet.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Back in 2012, I was stationed in Colorado Springs for a year. And while I was in the process of getting settled, I decided to check out the local scene. Colorado Springs is a unique place, part of this country. Very strange place.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

A lot of military. A lot of military. I was still waiting on my furniture arrive, and I had nothing to do at home. So I went to explore downtown. I managed to hit it off with some Air Force guys and spent the better part of the evening bar hopping with them. It got late and decided it was time to go home so I called a cab. I'm 39 years old and Uber was not a thing at the time. It's 2012. One of the air Force guys wanted to come with me. He was on his Last Hurrah before PCSing Permanent change of station to another duty station. So I figured he wanted to just hook up. I told him there's no way I can host I'm literally sleeping on an air mattress. He persisted. Eventually I relented and we came back to mine and he honestly didn't make a move. But he told me the craziest story. He'd been enlisted in the Air Force for a while. He was an E6. He was working at NORAD and somehow stumbled into a quote unquote a meeting that he shouldn't have belonged in. Sometimes if you're in uniform and keep a straight face, no one asked ask questions. At this meeting he said that there was an alien. I legit didn't believe him and I laughed when he told me again thinking he had an ulterior motives. But he persisted. He was very serious. The meeting was held at a conference table. In one of the chairs sat an alien. It was a small brown and had scales. According to my guest, it was anthropomorphic and had two giant black eyes and only nostrils, not a nose. It did not speak, but it did have a slit or a mouth should be. Instead of speaking, he communicated telepathically and everyone present was able to understand it. I didn't ask enough questions at the time, but I got the impression that my guest was telling the truth. But strange because he almost seemed sad to tell me this story. Not excited, scared or curious, almost depressed. I don't know what message the alien relayed, but the meeting was amongst a bunch of US military officials according to him. But he has according to the Unfortunately I don't have any more details. He spent the night in my slowly deflating air mattress. He never tried anything with me, had a banana in the morning and then called his room trying to pick him up. I've never heard from him again. I want to believe him and I hope there are more legitimate sightings. But there's something ominous about an unknown secret race of be secretive race of beings of their possible relationship with our government that has the undertones of both awe and fright. Maybe we'll come to know more in question. If there's a God I'M an atheist, studied zoology and a fossil record of aliens from another world exist. And if somehow resembles us, how do I change? Justify that. But sometimes you just got to let go and say it.

[B]

I never heard of brown scaly aliens.

[A]

It's the all different types. The ones with big noses. There are ones that are, you know, you get the tall whites. You've got.

[B]

There's grays in the tall white.

[A]

But there's many style of alien. There's many, many style of alien. A lot of the grays they say are robotic. But I guess he teased brown. He brown.

[B]

Et's brown as he's fake. Yeah, but he's cool.

[A]

You're right.

[B]

He's very cool.

[A]

I wish it was real now.

[B]

That's so fucked up though. He didn't say what the alien said. That's the whole. That's the most important part of the story.

[A]

I guess he wasn't ready to have sex with that man enough.

[B]

Or was. Or what guy was. Wasn't paying attention.

[A]

God. Yeah. He was just like wondering why are we listening? Why. Why would. Can someone please, please. Yeah. Small brown scale. What does it say here on Pinterest?

[B]

Yeah, I don't see a small brown alien.

[A]

I got to look at my. Have an alien book at home. I'm gonna look at it. So just guys, remember. Wow. First one in Eddie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

First one of 20. 25 in 2020.

[B]

Feeling good.

[A]

Feeling well, you. You're fine.

[B]

I mean, I'm feeling. I'm feeling mediocre. To be honest with you. I'm about 80%.

[A]

But hey, can only go uphill from here.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

So live every day known for a fact. You're at the bottom of a hill. You just got to roll towards more the bottom, honestly. Cuz sometimes you'd really like. You'd love the fact. You'd love the bottom. You never actually know how much fun you can have at the bottom once.

[B]

You get to the bottom dig.

[A]

Just be there for a while. Just like go it right. But then laugh as you ascend because you know that. Yes, Wheeze. Wheeze is that you know that you have technically made it worse for yourself. But in the end, when you dig yourself out of a hole, people like you better.

[B]

That is so true. Thursday. That's right. This Thursday hoopa. Goo goo. The HGX2 coming to the LPN Twitch channel.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

At 6pm Pacific, 9pm Eastern. We got Jared Logan judging this.

[A]

Love him.

[B]

It's going to be amazing. I'm very excited for the Show. I love Hoopa Goo Goo. Our first one of 2025, the year that it all takes place.

[A]

Yes. And I can't wait. It's just. Which is go. Are we not moving ahead a year?

[B]

No, we are. It's 2026 in Hoopa Gooland.

[A]

Good, good.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Don't worry.

[A]

So thank you, guys. Go to our patreon.com podcast enough to watch us flop. Our JS. Go to Twitch TV, LPNTV to watch Hobagoo is HDX2 and go to last podcast on the left.com to buy tickets to see us live. We are going to be amazing, I promise you.

[B]

That's right. We're in Atlanta, Dallas, Nashville, Detroit, Toronto and more to come.

[A]

Yeah, baby.

[B]

We got some side story shows that are going to be announced soon. Oh, yeah, I'm excited. We got a bunch of stuff coming down the pipe. Y'all love it. I'm sorry about Christmas that I got sick twice.

[A]

We are going to make it up next year.

[B]

Yeah, we are going to. Or, you know, we'll find another. We'll replace that. Oh, yeah, yeah. We'll replace that date sooner than Christmas.

[A]

Oh, definitely. We're definitely going to replace the Masonic Lodge date.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry about that. We had to cancel. That. That was. That was a. That was a big. The LPN Fun House gave us. Gave. Gave us company.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And that's what happened. Yep.

[A]

But hey, we're healed and all for the better for it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

We can't necessarily tie it to that day, but I'm not going to not.

[B]

It had to have been that.

[A]

I mean, I don't know because I'm.

[B]

You know, Lord Humongous is Covid.

[A]

No, he's not. He's clean. He's the cleanest man. Honestly, what I love about Lard is that he's so soft spoken and nice.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And he's got a lovely wife.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

You know, I mean, like, I don't want to bust his character, but he's.

[B]

Like, he's so kind.

[A]

He's such a kind, sweet, gentle man to be that. Yes.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. All right, guys, love you. Bye.