Side Stories: Mo Money Less Problems

Summary

Podcast Summary: Last Podcast on the Left - Side Stories: Mo Money Less Problems

Release Date: July 9, 2025

Hosts: Eddie and Ed Larson

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Introduction

In this episode of Last Podcast on the Left, titled Side Stories: Mo Money Less Problems, hosts Eddie and Ed Larson delve into a mix of current events, conspiracy theories, personal anecdotes, and international oddities. Skipping the usual advertisements and introductory segments, the hosts engage in candid conversations that blend humor with serious discussions.

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Texas Floods: Tragedy and Heroism [04:11 - 05:43]

The episode opens with a heartfelt discussion about the devastating Texas floods, which have resulted in a death toll rising to 101. Ed Larson expresses his sadness, stating, “It's really, really sad, and it's… it's extremely horrible” (04:20).

Heroic Acts:

• Eddie highlights acts of bravery, mentioning, “There were those two Mexican girls that saved a bunch of girls” (04:36), acknowledging their heroic efforts despite the overwhelming tragedy.

Community Response:

• The hosts lament the inaction of some adults during the disaster, reflecting on a video where, “[A child] said, should we run? That they were all like, yeah, we should” (04:55), illustrating a microcosm of leadership failures in crisis situations.

Support and Donations:

• Eddie expresses solidarity with Texas, “I love you, Texas, especially San Antonio” (05:26), while also touching on the challenges of donating effectively amid such disasters.

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Jeffrey Epstein Conspiracy Theories [05:42 - 17:06]

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to dissecting the controversial death of Jeffrey Epstein.

Official Narrative vs. Conspiracies:

• Ed Larson critiques the official stance, “They just got everyone horny” (06:45), questioning the legitimacy of Epstein’s suicide and suggesting foul play.

Alleged Connections:

• The hosts discuss Epstein’s purported connections with influential figures, including Donald Trump and Bill Clinton. Ed Larson sarcastically remarks, “I think it's Clinton's way ahead of him. I think there's guys that… a lot of the really intense evidence is in the center of all of this CSAM” (08:59), insinuating a cover-up involving powerful entities.

Role of the FBI and Evidence Handling:

• Concerns are raised about the FBI's handling of Epstein’s case, particularly regarding child pornography material. Ed Larson states, “They have nothing against the bees. And so the bees just had to wait” ([visibility issue could not assign precise timestamps here]).

Public Figures’ Involvement:

• Discussions pivot to public figures linked to Epstein, with Ed Larson mocking figures like Elon Musk’s remarks on the Epstein list and criticizing Prince Andrew, despite earlier references to his exoneration.

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P. Diddy’s Legal Troubles [10:06 - 12:20]

Transitioning from Epstein, the podcast addresses the legal issues surrounding P. Diddy.

Court Verdicts and Public Reaction:

• Eddie discusses the disappointing RICO verdict against P. Diddy, suggesting that the jury lacked understanding: “It seems that quite a bit this is more conjecture” (10:38).

Probable Outcomes:

• The hosts speculate that P. Diddy might receive a lenient sentence, with Ed Larson stating, “I think they're gonna slap his wrist and they're gonna let him go” (12:14).

Economic Resilience:

• A recurring theme is the notion that wealth shields individuals from significant consequences. Ed Larson cynically muses, “Mo money, less problems” (12:26), implying that financial resources mitigate legal and personal issues.

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Michael Madsen’s Death and Legacy [19:00 - 21:22]

The podcast reflects on the passing of actor Michael Madsen, known for his roles in crime dramas.

Career and Personal Life:

• Eddie shares anecdotes about Madsen’s intense acting methods, specifically recalling a traumatic on-set incident: “He took him for a ride for 45 minutes and, like, banged up his head” (19:28).

Legal Troubles:

• The hosts touch upon Madsen’s legal issues, including accusations of domestic violence and misdemeanor trespassing charges, juxtaposing his professional acclaim with personal struggles.

Legacy in Film:

• Ed Larson praises Madsen’s performances, especially in Sin City, and expresses grief over his death: “He was great in Sin City. And he will be missed” (20:46).

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Foreign Report: International Oddities [42:28 - 64:38]

In a new segment titled "Foreign Report," Eddie and Ed explore bizarre and unusual events from around the globe.

Bee Attack in Oriole, France [43:00 - 48:38]

• Incident Overview: An unusual bee attack in Oriole, France, resulted in 24 injuries, including critical cases.
• Misidentification of Hornets: The French mayor attributes the attacks to Asian hornets, though the hosts humorously question the validity of distinguishing between Asian and American hornets, leading to mockery of racial profiling of insects.
• Host Commentary: Both hosts poke fun at the situation, with Ed Larson quipping, “You could cut that into little sleeves” (43:22), and Eddie debating the nomenclature differences.

Arrest of Belly Dancer in Egypt [53:57 - 59:01]

• Case Details: Linda Martino, a half-Italian, half-Egyptian belly dancer, was arrested in Egypt for violating public morals through her art.
• Host Reactions: Eddie defends Martino, emphasizing her artistry: “Belly dancing is an art. It cannot be a crime” (56:48).
• Cultural Commentary: The hosts mock Egypt's conservatism humorously, while expressing support for Martino's right to dance.

Panther Man in Somerset, UK [60:09 - 64:38]

• Description: A mysterious figure known as Panther Man haunts graveyards in Somerset, wearing a cat mask and skin-tight suit, startling and confusing locals.
• Behavior Analysis: The hosts humorously speculate on his intentions, suggesting he might be harmless yet perplexing: “He just goes… I think he's just making panther noises” (60:53).
• Cultural Impact: Ed Larson connects this to previous urban legends, adding comedic flair to the bizarre antics of Panther Man.

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Listener Emails and AI Discussions [65:05 - 68:52]

The hosts address listener emails, touching on topics like AI and personal anecdotes.

AI Skepticism:

• Ed Larson shares multiple listener inputs expressing skepticism about AI’s capabilities, humorously asserting, “there's no reason to be afraid of AI. It's stupid” (65:18).

OnlyFans and Chatbots:

• Discussions involve the inability to distinguish between real individuals and chatbots on platforms like OnlyFans, warning listeners to “understand that 95 to 99% of the time… you are not” (66:58).

Personal Stories:

• Ed Larson shares a personal story about his father's haunted doll collection, blending humor with eerie storytelling, reflecting on unexplained phenomena in their household.

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Upcoming Shows and Announcements [75:14 - 78:52]

Concluding the episode, Eddie and Ed Larson promote their upcoming live shows and tours across various cities, including Salt Lake City, Asheville, Charlotte, and Los Angeles. They humorously discuss their stage attire and the challenges of performing live, ensuring listeners of the entertaining experiences ahead.

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Notable Quotes

• Ed Larson (04:20): "It's really, really sad, and it's… it's extremely horrible."
• Eddie (04:36): "There were those two Mexican girls that saved a bunch of girls."
• Ed Larson (06:45): “They just got everyone horny.”
• Eddie (05:26): “I love you, Texas, especially San Antonio.”
• Ed Larson (12:26): “Mo money, less problems.”
• Eddie (56:48): “Belly dancing is an art. It cannot be a crime.”
• Ed Larson (65:18): “There's no reason to be afraid of AI. It's stupid.”

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Conclusion

Side Stories: Mo Money Less Problems offers a blend of dark humor, critical commentary, and absurd anecdotes, staying true to Last Podcast on the Left’s style. From the grim realities of natural disasters and convoluted conspiracy theories to the surreal tales from around the world, Eddie and Ed Larson provide an engaging narrative that entertains while provoking thought.

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Note: This summary is based on the provided transcript up to 78:52 minutes. Any content beyond this point is not included.

Transcript

[Eddie]

When life brings the blah, Add more yabba dabba doo with some tasty fruity Pebbles. Early morning meeting, blah. Someone brought the Pebbles. Yabba dabba doo. Run errands, blah. Head to the store for Pebbles. Yabba dabba doo. Fruity Pebbles. Less blah, More yabba dabba doo. Pick up pebble cereal today. Yabba dabba doo. And the Flintstones and all related characters and elements copyright and trademark Hanna Barbera.

[Henry Zabrowski]

In the summer, all of Oregon is our playground thanks to our incredible park system. That's why it's so cool that Oregon Lottery gameplay like video lottery or cash pop, helps support tons of parks. Projects statewide like accessible trails at Silver Falls State park or upgrades to your favorite dog park in Newburgh. It's just one way a little lottery play for many Oregonians can add up to a lot of good. The Oregon Lottery. Together we do good things. Lottery games are based on chance and should be played for entertainment only. Must be 18 or older to play.

[Ed Larson]

There's no place to escape to.

[Eddie]

This is the last on the left side stories.

[Ed Larson]

That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's another beautiful day here in radio land. Yeah. Nothing but laughter. Nothing but wall to wall yucks. Is that right, Eddie?

[Eddie]

Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday.

[Ed Larson]

But when they get it, it's Wednesday.

[Eddie]

I'm the ham man. Oink, oink.

[Ed Larson]

We need a soundboard. Why don't we have a soundboard? So many people have accused us of being one sound.

[Eddie]

We have one sound. What's our sound?

[Ed Larson]

This.

[Eddie]

Oh, Jesus.

[Ed Larson]

Perfect moment. And then like for the audience. I just want the audience to just before we begin today, this pan flute's for you.

[Eddie]

Yes. Frying pan flute. If you're put in some pork, but.

[Ed Larson]

Unless of course you're trying to diet.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Then just the flute. What this sound will allow you to do is release the tensions from wondering if a flood's going to sneak up on you now that there's no weather alerts anymore.

[Eddie]

Yes. It's so nice that this all happened right before hurricane season.

[Ed Larson]

I think it's good to allow this pan flutes to settle in while we wait for the truth about Jeffrey Epstein.

[Eddie]

He did nothing, apparently.

[Ed Larson]

Scott Kleen, completely innocent.

[Eddie]

I can't think he's such a good guy.

[Ed Larson]

And I just want to just. You know what I do? I take. I'm in CBT right now, right? So we do this thing called half smile willing hands cheeseburger therapy. No, no, no. That's myself. That's my self directed treatment plan. But with half smile, what you're supposed to do is think of the most upsetting thing you can think of. So right now, what I'm thinking of is Trump making love to his daughter. Okay, let's.

[Eddie]

Not that upsetting.

[Ed Larson]

I mean, it is. And so what I'm doing is I'm.

[Eddie]

It's just facts and facts.

[Ed Larson]

The key here is it's just smile, half smile, wailing hands, open hands, and you immediately feel better about the image.

[Eddie]

Ah. You know what I did when I was really upset about the flood in Texas yesterday? What? I just watched a bunch of Stevie Ray Vaughan live.

[Ed Larson]

Let him.

[Eddie]

Saw him do Texas flood. 10 minutes. Man, that guy rocks.

[Ed Larson]

I think that's inappropriate. I think it's inappropriate. You were listening.

[Eddie]

It's how I channeled my anger.

[Ed Larson]

You were listening to Texas Flood.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

By Stevie Ray Vaughan. And I am. I am thankful he didn't have to live to see this.

[Eddie]

No, no, no.

[Ed Larson]

I am thankful. So welcome.

[Eddie]

I think he would have preferred to be alive.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, very much so. I think that you've been like, I just got clean.

[Eddie]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Mr. Blues Man.

[Eddie]

When's the last time you saw him? His noodle, dude. That dude, he had some stink face.

[Ed Larson]

No, he. He was honestly, probably the blackest white man to ever exist. And he was allowed. Yeah. And welcome to side Stories. My name is Henry Zabrowski. I'm here with Ed Larson.

[Eddie]

How you doing, everybody?

[Ed Larson]

Well, if people. A lot of stuff's flying around. Eddie, you think.

[Eddie]

Is there news?

[Ed Larson]

There's a lot of news.

[Eddie]

Is there news?

[Ed Larson]

There's more news that we. Then can. We can use.

[Eddie]

Ah, more news than we can use.

[Ed Larson]

Yep, yep. And not. Not all of it's great. So number one, I believe the death toll in the Texas floods, these flash floods, it just rose to 101 cracked.

[Eddie]

100.

[Ed Larson]

I do believe that it wiped out a bunch of children on a Girl Scout mission. Something like that.

[Eddie]

There were those two Mexican girls that saved a bunch of girls.

[Ed Larson]

Those two did good. That did good. In another guy, I saw some other guy, he saved like a hundred people. But it doesn't really matter. It's just one of these. It's really, really sad, and it's. There's no way for us to make it funny.

[Eddie]

I watched a video of people looking at the. It would look about 40 adults filming the flood coming.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, very much so.

[Eddie]

And it wasn't until a child said, should we run? That they were all like, yeah, we should.

[Ed Larson]

I do feel like it's sort of. That is a microcosm of the entire issue.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

In which they're just. The adults are watching a big, massive thing come to kill everybody. And it's taking some of the kids, one or two of the kids, to.

[Eddie]

Be like, maybe we should not do that.

[Ed Larson]

You know, it's just very difficult. But our hearts go out to the people of, like, they're dealing with. This is extremely horrible.

[Eddie]

I love you, Texas, especially San Antonio.

[Ed Larson]

We do. Sorry, we can't send anything. That's how it goes. Yeah. Would you send 50 bucks? Oh, wow, that's great. To where?

[Eddie]

To where? I said I can't remember. Somewhere they've told me to do it and I did it.

[Ed Larson]

We'll plug it up.

[Eddie]

I'll look it up.

[Ed Larson]

Other big news this week. I just want to say thank you. I want to say big thank you. A huge, huge, heartfelt thank you to the YouTuber that runs the FBI and the blond prostitute. That is the attorney general that they have declared Jeffrey Epstein committed suicide. That's done. This case is closed. And there is no way, no way he ever held any form of blackmail material on anybody that was extremely important to the US Government or technology or. Or education or politics or within the intelligence community or within the Israeli intelligence community or within the English intelligence community or royalty. There's just absolutely no way. There's nothing. Nothing. Except for there is apparently quite a bit of child pornography that they are just digging their way through.

[Eddie]

Yeah. And he committed suicide. So that's kind of. That's a type of murder. Yes. You know, he did that.

[Ed Larson]

They call that. They. Honestly, they say that suicidality is a direct connection to homicidal intentions.

[Eddie]

Oh.

[Ed Larson]

Because you're killing the whole world when you kill yourself.

[Eddie]

Wow.

[Ed Larson]

So it's actually very difficult.

[Eddie]

But Convoy of Hope, by the way, I found it.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, good.

[Eddie]

That's who I donated to.

[Ed Larson]

This is not about Epstein.

[Eddie]

Not about Epstein.

[Ed Larson]

This is about.

[Eddie]

I'm going backwards. But I just wanted to say Convoy of Hope.

[Ed Larson]

So I just think when you do.

[Eddie]

It, do it in Jeffrey Epstein's name, please.

[Ed Larson]

If anything, honestly, if we can get multiple receipts of you giving money to the Texas Floods to Convoy of Hope, in Jeffrey Epstein's name. I'm sending you a shirt. I'm gonna send you a fucking shirt. I want to see it. Because again, help but make them confused. That's always the key. That's always the key. But Jeffrey Epstein, it's, you know, Donald Trump.

[Eddie]

Turns out he's a good guy.

[Ed Larson]

He's a good guy. He's a normal guy. You know. Well, except for you. Did you see the pictures of him with, like, sucking on the ear of a child that was like sitting directly on dick and balls on his little private jet?

[Eddie]

I missed that one.

[Ed Larson]

Yep. And there was also the one with the text chain. Yeah, I should have said it. I should have said it. I forgot to include you. That's with my other boys. I, you know, I didn't expect anything less. I didn't expect anything. The footage that they put out as a part of. So obviously Pam Biondi, she released this, like, scattershot section of documents in February of this year that had nothing that we hadn't seen before except for some unredacted addresses of certain numbers inside of his little black book. But that led to nowhere. Then they said, the client list is on my desk. We're going to fucking go. We're going to hunt everybody one by one. Then Elon Musk and Trump had their little stupid fake kayfabe breakup in front of everybody where Musk said that Trump was on the list and that's the reason why he's covering it up. And then he said, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Can I still be a Nazi in America? And then they went and he. So they were like, we're going to get to the very bot this. And then it seems it all just kind of one zip, Right.

[Eddie]

All the way back up.

[Ed Larson]

Because they're saying Epstein had no client list, but we know he had a little black book.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

And I just think that maybe an international spy, I'm going to say, across the globe, child sexual abuse material producer, the member of the intelligence community. I'm just thinking he's not going to write at the top of a list. Client list. Yeah, here's all the names and three girls to Clinton. Yeah, I don't think it works like that. I think that he was a bit clever. I also think that maybe a lot of the really intense evidence is in the center of all of this csam, all this child sexual abuse material that is a bit icky for the FBI to go through.

[Eddie]

Yes. And this new guy, I mean, you know, get put in the work, see what he can find.

[Ed Larson]

The only thing he's doing right now is like, I honestly think it's just him, RFK Jr. Hanging out with a bunch of falconers, golfing on the weekends while Texas slides into the fucking crevices of the earth. And while every single criminal that has a touch to a camera is doing great.

[Eddie]

I just have to assume, since Patel has access to all of the child pornography that he's just jerking off to it all day.

[Ed Larson]

You know, honestly, at some point he's like, get this away from me. Me, I've had enough. You know, I'm empty. I can't come anymore. If I, if I jerk off one more time through this child sexual abuse material, my wife's gonna talk to me. You know, that's not what they want to deal with. And we also saw this week that the Diddy verdict was disappointing.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

He got. Obviously they had overcharged him on the RICO stuff, I guess. I honestly think it was just the jury did not fully understand what they were there to do. It seems that quite a bit this is more conjecture and it seems to be some kind of like I was reading some commentary on it. Yeah. So I don't know if this is true or not, but it actually seems that some of the freak off video material did the opposite of what they thought it was going to do.

[Eddie]

They just got everyone horny.

[Ed Larson]

I think that it. The problem is that the, the jury maybe could not understand that on camera. And in this scenario, everybody can look like they're having fun.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

But the scenario around it is not. So that's the issue as I think that, that, that the. We have a bit of a jury education problem. I do believe that's a part of what happened here. And they could not properly convince them that he was trafficking women around in some gigantic racketeering like industry.

[Eddie]

Kind of weird how it happens the same week, you know.

[Ed Larson]

Eddie. Eddie wonder. You really wonder because now did. He's trying to get his. His going to get his pardon from.

[Eddie]

Trump because he was denied bail.

[Ed Larson]

Was denied bail because he's definitely going to run the second that he's out of there. The second he's out of there. But he's also really thankful for the fact that he is didn't get the racketeering charges. As you could see as he fell to his knees in exultation when they just gave him probably he's. He might get 10 years.

[Eddie]

I did they saying five.

[Ed Larson]

I doubt he even gets that.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

I think they're gonna. I think they're gonna slap his wrist and they're gonna let him go, I think because they don't want to deal with it anymore. And I think that.

[Eddie]

So do you think that it's, you know, mo money less problems, Eddie?

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I think that you. I think that you might just hit upon an esoteric universal truism.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Mo money less problems.

[Eddie]

More money less problems.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Because you really can get rid of a lot of problems.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

With this amount of money. Because even with all the vines, even with everything levied against P. Diddy, you know what he's going to be worth after it? $400 million.

[Eddie]

Really?

[Ed Larson]

So he's fine.

[Eddie]

Yeah. No, it seems like he's got it.

[Ed Larson]

All figured out fine. He's going to come. He's going to make records in jail. They gave. They all gave him a standing ovation when he walked into jail. So it's like it's a whole right now as people. Eddie, do we need to be worse people?

[Eddie]

I'm excited for his new song. It's all about the Benjamin Netanyahu's.

[Ed Larson]

Whoa. That is actually gonna be very. It's very complicated. And I don't even know if we can keep it in the show. I don't know. I'm not even really certain what the joke is. Pretty silly. I don't even really know, but I know I don't know what the joke.

[Eddie]

Is, but I just know that it's upsetting.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah. I was. I was watching this thing. One of the funny things, you know, obviously I go to in my. One of my big boomer things. I listen to old Stern. Episod One of the things was an old Eric, the actor was a whack packer that had a manager by the name of Johnny Fr. And he talked about how his Johnny Fr. Said that his father was connected deep into the Jersey Mafia. And he would do this thing where as little kids, they'd always ask questions. He'd always say, like, if anybody asks you anything that happens in this house or anything, you don't know nothing. You didn't hear nothing. All right? And the way you're gonna know when I answer that, you're gonna feel it in your belly, right? And he said that they got in trouble as kids because on 9 11, when they talked about 9 11, they asked me, no, it was JFK. They asked about who killed JFK. And he said that like it was right after he was assassinated. And so the first thought in his head was like the nun asked him, so who was the man who shot jfk? And his first answer was, I don't know nothing. I didn't see nothing. I didn't hear nothing. And he was just like. Cuz I knew. I felt nut that it was that type of question. And so this is the. This is where we're at. I. I think that I personally, I believe in the end, I do. I am one of those that believe that Jeffrey Epstein did kill himself. I think he was given an opportunity to kill himself.

[Eddie]

Yeah. They said, hey Jeff, it's time to go. And he said, no problem.

[Ed Larson]

Got it.

[Eddie]

Will do.

[Ed Larson]

Yep. And I do believe he himself was genuinely upset about being in jail. The, the video that was released to prove it this time was this 10 hour long something like that video of the outside of Epstein's cell in this Manhattan correctional facility. And you see it and they say this proves nobody walked in and killed Jeffrey Epstein. But then guess what they did.

[Eddie]

What?

[Ed Larson]

They released it and there's a minute cut from it. It's a minute cut from it. In the most. This is what you'd call like if this isn't a limited hangout, which is a CIA term for leaving a little bit enough out to say we acknowledge it, but then look, this is real. This cut from 11:58 to midnight on the night that Epstein committed suicide is real.

[Eddie]

Oh my God.

[Ed Larson]

And then a reporter directly asked Trump today in the White House about this missing minute and he goes off, flips out about like, why are we talking still about Jeffrey Epstein, the most most guilty man yelling. Because I don't even think that Trump's the most guilty when it comes to the connections of Jeffrey Epstein.

[Eddie]

No, of course not.

[Ed Larson]

I think it's Clinton's way ahead of him. I think there's a, guys that, I think Trump was a fellow predator that was friends with a predator.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

And they were, they were co predators in separate little lakes. And then eventually when they're, when they, that's what they do, they butt heads.

[Eddie]

I think they went to each other's lakes a couple times.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, they children together. Yes, but they were, but he didn't buy those children from Epstein. He bought, he brought his own. He had a byoc.

[Eddie]

You think so?

[Ed Larson]

Yes. He brought his own children to the party. And then Jeffrey Epstein has his children at the party and he's given them the Prince Andrew also. Don't worry, the FBI completely exonerated Prince Andrew.

[Eddie]

Okay, good. Thank God.

[Ed Larson]

So he's fine too. Definitely didn't do anything. Yeah, definitely didn't do anything. It's just this. I don't know how to feel, Eddie.

[Eddie]

Well, I mean, what did you expect? Did you think that Trump was going to be like, you know what, I'm on the list, we should arrest me, you know, that's what he was going to do.

[Ed Larson]

No, no, no. You know what's funny is that I'm just even surprised. It's just this is how I truly, I Think how bad the current administration is at being villains right now.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Like, how bad they are at being the villain. It's the fact that if you really wanted to make me shut the up, you would have never mentioned it ever again. You would have buried it fully. You would have said, it's classified.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

This is way worse of a move.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Than the other one.

[Eddie]

Unless out of nowhere, just back. Nothing.

[Ed Larson]

Nothing. Because you know what? It's also to keep us all talking about the fact that. And it is true, we are here talking about Epstein and not talking about the fact that they gutted all these national institutions. That is going to make the weather way more difficult to predict.

[Eddie]

We did that on top.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I know. That is the real. That's, like, one of the big things that they're also glossing over. Where's Musk now?

[Eddie]

Yeah, well, Musk is. He's still tweeting about the. The Epstein list, and he's invoking Peanut the Squirrel.

[Ed Larson]

I saw.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

He said Glee. Peanut the Squirrel's name out of your fucking mouth, you South African Nazi. That's right, you fuck. You get the fuck out of my country. You're the one person I hope they deport. Okay? I hope they wrap your head in fucking duct tape and ship you to the worst place in the goddamn world.

[Eddie]

I was thinking about getting a Tesla.

[Ed Larson]

I perform my German auto engineering. I love my German auto engineering. Okay, so today I promised that we would start intense, and then we're going to get stupider as we go.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

So that I feel like we've done that. They're thinking we started intense here.

[Eddie]

Can I do something kind of intense? Slightly stupid. Michael Madsen died.

[Ed Larson]

The thing about slightly stupid. You know what's funny about Michael Madsen is that I've never heard a single nice thing said about the man himself.

[Eddie]

I don't know if I've heard bad things either. I don't think. I just as much as, like. I just know he's rotten.

[Ed Larson]

Michael Madsen is one of those complicated faves.

[Eddie]

I watched a interview because whenever someone dies, Letterman puts out an interview with him. It's just like what he does on YouTube. Like, and he's Letterman's quick, his cat. Like, if they're dead. Like, I'm talking 20 minutes. Letterman's like, here's my interview. You know, so. But then I saw. I watched the Michael Madsen one last night, and he's just talking about how in Reservoir Dogs, the cop who was in the trunk, he wanted to, like, get ready for his scene. And then. So he told Madsen to put him in the trunk and drive around the block. But Madsen took him for a ride for 45 minutes and, like, banged up his head and shit and like, really hurt him. Yeah. Yeah. It sounds like he said he wanted.

[Ed Larson]

To get prepared for the scene. Yeah. I mean. And then you let Mr. P. If you're gonna let. What's his name is.

[Eddie]

He was Mr. Mister.

[Ed Larson]

He wasn't Mr.

[Eddie]

Pink.

[Ed Larson]

That.

[Eddie]

He wasn't Mr. Pink. He was Mr. Blonde.

[Ed Larson]

So you're gonna let him go. You want to get method with Michael Madson. He might you up. He did have some issues. He did some charity work quite a bit for the Shriners and. But he did have some legal issues. He definitely was accused of battering on his wife. And he definitely had some misdemeanor trespassing charges in earlier, actually pretty recently.

[Eddie]

Oh, recently. Yep. Oh, yeah.

[Ed Larson]

I mean, his son committed suicide, which is very sad.

[Eddie]

That's not. Yeah. That's not a black mark on him, I guess.

[Ed Larson]

No, it's very sad. But it didn't help with their marriage.

[Eddie]

No, it certainly did not help.

[Ed Larson]

But he's been doing it. Otherwise he was a freed willie. He did. And he was great in Sin City. And he will be missed, I think.

[Eddie]

As far as, like.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Bad dudes who are all who also play bad dudes in movies. He was one of the best.

[Ed Larson]

At same thing. If you.

[Eddie]

If you. Tom Sizemore.

[Ed Larson]

Tim and Tom Sizemore constantly.

[Eddie]

God, you know, they had fun together.

[Ed Larson]

I don't even. But you know what you say fun. They had fun.

[Eddie]

They had.

[Ed Larson]

Everybody else was frightened.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

But at least they were having fun.

[Eddie]

What do you think? Do you think Chris Penn seemed like he was probably nice, though?

[Ed Larson]

I don't know.

[Eddie]

I. I'm going to say Chris Penn might have been nice.

[Ed Larson]

I think that if you were serving him food or you were sitting on his lap and you had a big ass, big tits, you might really like it.

[Eddie]

I know his brother is Sean Penn, who doesn't have the best of the reputation.

[Ed Larson]

Not a good reputation.

[Eddie]

No. But maybe Chris Penn died early enough. Whoa.

[Ed Larson]

I didn't know that they were in a movie together. Tom Sizemore and Michael Madsen were in a movie called Buck Series.

[Eddie]

Okay. What was that from?

[Ed Larson]

It's 2023.

[Eddie]

We had to have been in a couple things together.

[Ed Larson]

That's called a divorce project.

[Eddie]

Are they. Do you think they were. They had to have been in a bunch of movies together. I'm thinking about it. It's all like, connected in A weird way, but they're not in the same.

[Ed Larson]

Ones because Michael Matson, Tom Sizemore, was he in any other.

[Eddie]

Tom Sizemore was in True Romance and Natural Born Killers. Character of Jack Scagnetti, who they reference in Reservoir Dogs as his parole officer.

[Ed Larson]

That's f donated.

[Eddie]

But he's not actually in the Tarantino directed films.

[Ed Larson]

That's a real. Wow.

[Eddie]

That's my little. That's my little movie nerd brain thing.

[Ed Larson]

Really good work. Also lost.

[Eddie]

Wow.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. A lot of problems.

[Eddie]

A lot of problems.

[Ed Larson]

Tom. Say more.

[Eddie]

He was a bad man.

[Ed Larson]

Tom Sore had a bigger career and bigger criminal. Criminal career. He had both.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

He technically had more movies under his belt than my.

[Eddie]

Pretty sure. Tom S. Moore died in every movie he was in.

[Ed Larson]

As he should have.

[Eddie]

At least you know, Michael Madsen was in Free Willy and he got to.

[Ed Larson]

Live then, dude, you know, but the.

[Eddie]

Whale, you know, was.

[Ed Larson]

Ended up dying, you know, just came on Criterion, which is great. Strange Days.

[Eddie]

Oh, I was hoping you were going to say Free Willy too.

[Ed Larson]

I just watched Free Willy 2 straight to the can.

[Eddie]

No, I just watched Strange Days. Great. It's a great movie.

[Ed Larson]

Crass.

[Eddie]

Bigalow. Awesome.

[Ed Larson]

Super. Super.

[Eddie]

I love that movie. From your grave. Right now we all need to be saving a little bit of money. With inflation out of control and life just being crazy and summer coming around the corner, anywhere you can save a little bit, it's really going to help out. And the place that you're spending without paying attention, Rocket Money is going to help you find that. They're going to help you manage these subscriptions, track your spending and cut costs. That could feel overwhelming. Rocket Money saved me. All right. I've talked about this before. I had no idea how much I was actually spending on things. I wasn't even using newspapers that I didn't even know I was subscribing to. They help me out. You plug in your information and they go like, hey, did you know that you're doing this over here? Do you know you're paying this streaming service for that? Do you know that you're still buying DVDs from this company that doesn't really even rent out DVDs anymore? I was doing it. And you know who got me out of it? Rocket Money. I love you for it, baby. Thank you so much for taking your time and taking care of your customers. It's so rare that you subscribe to something that saves you money and Rocket Money does that. So cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com LPOTL today, that's RocketMoney.com LPOTL RocketMoney.com LPOTL Save it baby. You need it.

[Ed Larson]

This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace gives you everything you need to offer services and get paid all in one place. Seems amazing, right? It's because it is. From consultations to events and experiences, showcase your offerings with a customizable website designed to attract clients and grow your business. Which is good because let's just say I need it. You know, as you may or may not know, I lost horse picks.com in a very, very public and embarrassing auction to a young man by the name of Charlie Buck. It who has decided to take my horse picks and drive it towards the right. Some of the incendiary horse picks that I've seen, including Steve Bannon on a Clydesdale, one of the worst I saw was Ivanka Trump inside of a mayor. And I know that this is not the direction that I saw. Horsepix.com and. And that little boy, I didn't know that he'd become a full fledged Nazi and, and grow his hair into broccoli shapes and do all sorts of things I don't understand. Which is why I've started Emu Paintings.com thank you Squarespace, because Emu Paintings.com are these really, it's an exceptional way for me to get you paintings of emus in various positions that emus would normally be. And in a way, I find it both amusing and inspiring to see what emus can do using the painter's brush and imagination. And if it wasn't for Squarespace, I would be absolutely F'd to the gills. That's the term for being absolutely s out of luck. Squarespace, thank you for streamlining your workflow with built in tools because I would not have been able to get this website up fast enough due to the legal fees I've received and the personal heartache and my own health deteriorating. I just want to say thank you Squarespace, for all your help. And emu paintings.com is going to be just as good and just as funny and relevant. I promise. Had to squarespace.com left for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code left to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. This is an advertisement from BetterHelp. Oh, people are really getting stressed out of work. Not me. All I do is make them laugh. There's nothing stressful about making people laugh. Not the most esoteric nebulous thing in the world. But for those of you that do experience workplace stress, it's now as well, it's considered one of the top causes of declining mental health health. With 61% of the global workforce experiencing higher than normal levels of stress. It's almost like none of us like to work this hard. Most of us can't wave goodbye to work. But we could start small with a focus on wellness. With over 30,000 therapists worldwide, BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform, having served over 5 million people globally. Maybe they can make you feel better. And it works. With an app store rating of 4.9 out of 5 based on over 1.7 million client reviews. And that's just numbers. It's in the numbers.

[Eddie]

It works.

[Ed Larson]

It's convenient too. It's on your computer. So that's makes it super convenient. You don't have to go to some weird giant international hub in the basement of a, of a skyscraper just on your computer. Very easy. So as the largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of expertise. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/lastp pod. That's better h lp.com lastpod also, big stupid news. Big important thing to remind you guys. They try to take him away from us. They tried to. These fucking idiots. These fucking pieces of gatekeepers try to keep our boy Joey Chestnut from having competing advertising deals with other competitive eating competitions.

[Eddie]

And God forbid he'd eat a vegetable.

[Ed Larson]

God forbid. So Joey Chestnut, he walked away from the July 4th hot dog eating competition, Nathan's Famous Dogs in Coney island last year. And guess what? It suffered for it. Yeah, no one gave a. Nobody gave a. You idiot stupid ass hot dog. And say, welcome, Joey. Just not back back. And immediately took the title back just as he was supposed to. That's my boy.

[Eddie]

Seventy dogs, man.

[Ed Larson]

Seventy. And I think it's a half.

[Eddie]

Half. Seventy and a half.

[Ed Larson]

Don't take that from him.

[Eddie]

I won't take that from him. That's big numbers.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Eddie]

For a big boy.

[Ed Larson]

Oh yeah.

[Eddie]

God, he really is like, honestly, when you look at just straight statistics, maybe the greatest champion in sports history better than Wayne Gretzky.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, he's better than anybody else I've ever.

[Eddie]

Stupid Canadian.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, you missed that Canadian.

[Eddie]

You spilt on your jerky boy shirt.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, no, I got, I got coffee on my shirt. Oh, God, I'm all covered and I miss my mouth. But yeah, he's doing good. And so, you know, again, again, this goes to our third year in the row of asking Joey Chestnut to be on the show.

[Eddie]

Please, Joey.

[Ed Larson]

We tried to email him at Joey Chestnut at Gmail. We tried email Joey Hot dogs at Gmail. Please get in touch because I want to know. I want to talk about. I want to. I want to have a leisurely meal. Leisurely with Joey Chsnut.

[Eddie]

But I want it to last hours.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Eddie]

Yeah, maybe a buffet.

[Ed Larson]

Let's go to. You know, we should go to this Vegas Mozart. Moza.

[Eddie]

Moza.

[Ed Larson]

We should go to Moza.

[Eddie]

Oh, you think Joey likes Moza?

[Ed Larson]

I hope he likes Moza. Oh, I love Moza.

[Eddie]

How do you think he would do at the Vegas seafood buffet?

[Ed Larson]

Oh, he'd tear it up.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

You wouldn't even shell those crabs. Cracking with his teeth. All right, so now it's time because we're talking about the holiday. I know. Are we so proud to be American? Because at least I know. I know where my laws are written.

[Eddie]

Written. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And so what I am going to.

[Eddie]

Do, I know where I pee. I think it is. Sure.

[Ed Larson]

Yes, I do. And it's in my pants. So we want to talk about some of the fun ass. This is just the truth is that we got a good breakdown of all the people who died on July 4th.

[Eddie]

I mean, lots of things happened on July 4th. Lots of people died. But I think before we really get into all the deaths, I think we need to acknowledge New York.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, God. New York City, New York.

[Eddie]

Congratulations. You guys did it. I'm so proud of you. Not one person was killed or shot on July 4th in New York City.

[Ed Larson]

Until one of the funniest one of this is extremely. This is extremely funny. So the NYPD was so happy. So this was. It was 10am it was like on Friday morning, right? That night, drowning. They the NYPD so happy. Zero shootings or murders in New York City on July 4th. The last time in recorded history that happened was never like. That was the tweet, right, that they put out. However, hours later, the NYPD had to confirm that update. A man was dropped off at Brookdale Hospital by private means at 1:30am on July 5th. He was pronounced dead. This morning. NYPD act detectives just determined he was shot. Not at 11:45 on July 4th. That's what you get.

[Eddie]

God damn it.

[Ed Larson]

Almost. Don't celebrate until you're on the podium. That's how that goes. Don't you? You cannot. This is an example. This is a lesson. You don't celebrate you know how many team you know. You know how many times they used to show those on espn? The. The highlights of like the guys celebrating before they won.

[Eddie]

Oh, yeah. Leon let you know. Trying to take the ball all. And then it gets. And Don BB comes and knocks the ball out of his hand.

[Ed Larson]

Just don't do it. You gotta secure the W. That's right. That is the only way too. So make sure you. No matter what. Also, when you're watching horror movies and stuff like that. When I'm watching people handle like, you know, criminals and stuff like that. Beat them to death.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

If you got.

[Eddie]

And then monologue.

[Ed Larson]

If you're beating them. Right, right. And they've tried to kill you. Okay. And this is for anybody who's inside of a horror movie right now or is defending themselves while listening to the show. You just kill him. Okay. You need to complete the job. Because if not, they come back.

[Eddie]

Murder, death, kill, man. Every time. Yeah. I'm watching these movies. Everyone's always monologuing.

[Ed Larson]

No, talk to his dead body. Kill him.

[Eddie]

Kill him. Call his wife. Wife. Monologue at her.

[Ed Larson]

Absolutely. Do it. Go for live.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

On fate. On Instagram, Facebook.

[Eddie]

There's so many ways you could still monologue always.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. I'm an expert. So just know that. Kill first, then model.

[Eddie]

Yeah. So, yeah. So the cops, they this up the NYPD a little short.

[Ed Larson]

Little short. Honestly, we're calling them on it.

[Eddie]

I do remember one year, it was like New Year's Day and then like top headline in New York Post, no one murdered in Times Square last year.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

And it's just like an eight block radius.

[Ed Larson]

Yep. But it wouldn't be New York if it wasn't dangerous. So it has to stay that way.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

So sorry, guys.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

That's what is happening to you.

[Eddie]

You know, there's so many millions of people. I can't believe just one person was murdered.

[Ed Larson]

No, it's a big deal.

[Eddie]

How about that?

[Ed Larson]

It's still.

[Eddie]

It's a great accomplishment.

[Ed Larson]

Great stat.

[Eddie]

Yeah. I mean, it's what? There's 8 to 9 million people that live in New York at any given day. There's what, how many tourists? Another 2 million. And then you got bridge and tun coming in. That's another 2, 3 million. They're talking like 15 million people. Only one person got murdered. That is good numbers.

[Ed Larson]

But, Eddie, we didn't set the parameter.

[Eddie]

If they would have came out and said just one person murdered, I would have been proud of them. Yeah. I would have been like, good job, guys. Because they said no, and they were wrong. Now they're idiots.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, you, you, you were wrong. And that's stupid to do because guess what? Guess what? Close only counts in grenades and horseshoes, buddy.

[Eddie]

That's right.

[Ed Larson]

Because that doesn't. Yeah, it's still. Somebo died.

[Eddie]

All right?

[Ed Larson]

And it's just because we love to celebrate the way that we celebrate. And Ventura county, because California, one person died on a July 3 house fire after a fireworks exploded in the garage.

[Eddie]

Okay, yeah, that does happen.

[Ed Larson]

An 8 year old girl was killed in an explosion during a large illegal fireworks display. Yes, that was in Orange County.

[Eddie]

Of course, that's just California. Massachusetts we got.

[Ed Larson]

But even that is. That's more sad and tragic versus this Sussex county in Delaware.

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Ed Larson]

A man allegedly aimed numerous fireworks at people in the 100 block of Garfield Parkway. He aimed a mortar style firework at a large group of people on a beach. Everyone just got burnt.

[Eddie]

Yeah. And so. But yeah, they lost one of them guys. And then. And then we got. Florida had one. You know, they don't sleep on them. Nassau County.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Eddie]

Isn't that your people? No, Nassau, which you're Hillsboro. You're Hillsborough, Pinellas. Oh, yeah. So in Nassau county, several people suffered minor injuries, so not that bad. And a large gangway collapsed. So that's cool. That happened at the Fernanda Breach Harbor Marina.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, dude, you gotta be careful. Gotta keep your head in a swivel. Just because all the idiots that are there, don't be one man.

[Eddie]

I remember when I watched. I was on acid at the beach in Deerfield and I watched the pier explode on the fourth of July. That was. I sparked up a blunt and just watched that go up. It was up. But you know what?

[Ed Larson]

Sound like one of the Joker's hitmen.

[Eddie]

I was 17. I probably would have applied for the job.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Let me get in there. Let me kill. I want to set one of them on fire. A man was seriously injured after being hit in the face by a firework. Yeah, this was in Illinois. There was another one where a guy who died.

[Eddie]

Well, that was like Crystal Lake.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, no.

[Eddie]

Apparently Jason's getting a maze at Halloween horror nights this year. Oh, can you talk to those people? Can they talk us? Can they let us go for free?

[Ed Larson]

I've wanted to. I know the. You know what's funny is that I know so many haunt actors.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

They don't have any clout.

[Eddie]

Yeah. The actors, they don't care about them at all. No, they can't even. I mean, honestly, I don't even think those guys can connect us to their dealers.

[Ed Larson]

No.

[Eddie]

You know.

[Ed Larson]

No, no, no. I'd still have to get a second recommendation for their coke dealers. Yes. But I will say I the act. These scare actors I know are great, but they really can't seem to it up. We love you. Hollywood Horror Nights. Universal Nothing. I would go there every night.

[Eddie]

Yeah. If I could.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, I'd be outside. I'd work there.

[Eddie]

Oh my God. I really am mad that I missed my scare actor like opportunity in life.

[Ed Larson]

You would have not. It's very difficult, Eddie.

[Eddie]

I think I would have enjoyed it.

[Ed Larson]

You would have for a while as a younger man.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

You would.

[Eddie]

That's what I'm saying. I missed it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

In my 20s.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. In your 20s. Yeah. That's because you have to have the energy to do it.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Over and over and over and over again. And they're screaming, you know, it's like.

[Eddie]

You know, back in my 20s, you could. You could scare somebody, you know, every two minutes and it don't get old. No, I could do that for two, three months.

[Ed Larson]

I mean, I. Technically I still could, but I get tired now.

[Eddie]

I get. No. Physically tired.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Eddie]

I can't. I don't think I could physically do it anymore.

[Ed Larson]

But I love scaring people.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

If I can, I will. I would. I'd scare more. I wish I could. I'd scare people in my neighborhood all year. Nothing would make me happier than creating jump scares all year long. And people just need to stop, like getting their head on a goddamn swivel.

[Eddie]

Good news.

[Ed Larson]

News.

[Eddie]

I think you do. I think you scare some people. All those satanic books you're putting in those little private libraries.

[Ed Larson]

It's to educate.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Also they like. They should be so lucky. Some of them are rare. Yeah, I just put stuff in there. Well, I did I tell you that I did put a bunch of Henry Miller in one.

[Eddie]

Oh, really?

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Oh, I was just joking. You really did this.

[Ed Larson]

But you know who trot Cancer. You know that book?

[Eddie]

No.

[Ed Larson]

Where it's all like the angel fishes of a man. Most delectable flowers that one can see. See the blossomings of gonorrhea on his thin drifter hide. I knew the. The translucent gel of his. Of his spittle on my. My shaven like it's all stuff like that. But I think it's important you know who it is. If you know, like anybody. I now more I'm watching to see who takes the Henry Miller, you know, Henry Miller's. And he's in like Library.

[Eddie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's, you know, he seems like an all right guy. In Indiana, in Monroe County, a man died while lighting fireworks in Steinsville, northwest Bloomington. The man apparently tried to light a large fireworks motor while holding it over his head.

[Ed Larson]

An Indiana move. 23 year old man.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

That's very, very sad. But it's also appropriate. And also I think a tower 23 year old would like to die.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

In many ways I know that none of them really. You don't get a sense of like wanting to live or die. I think it's like 30.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

So I think that once you get there, like I think 23. If you told your ghost you died by blowing up your head with a firework mortar.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

He's gonna be like awesome.

[Eddie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Of course I did.

[Eddie]

Remember when the guy who played guests.

[Ed Larson]

Did Theo Vaughn see it? Yeah. Oh, good man. You. They gonna play that on? Put it on the field von man. That's what he needs.

[Eddie]

Do you remember when the guy who played Gaston at MGM Studios put the mortar on his. On top of his head and then lit it and then it backfired and blew up his brains in front of all the other Disney cast members at their fourth of July party.

[Ed Larson]

Hey, you gotta be careful. Gotta really be careful. That's the thing. Gotta remember, you're not Gaston.

[Eddie]

You're not. You are not. You are just a dude.

[Ed Larson]

You're just a man in a flammable outfit. Because that's the thing. You're in a very, very flammable outfit also.

[Eddie]

So Gaston's French. Yeah. So.

[Ed Larson]

No, hey, French. The, the French used to be super tough.

[Eddie]

They used to be.

[Ed Larson]

They killed all their leaders at one time.

[Eddie]

That is cool.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Back in the day.

[Eddie]

You know what? I take it back. France.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. They're fine. They, they protest all day.

[Eddie]

They really protest hard.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

They're just fun to make fun of.

[Ed Larson]

Of course. That's the idea. That's what they. They exist. This is, this is the tet. A tet we all have. This is. They, this is what we're allowed. They, they have like more civil liberty, but it's stinkier there.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

So we can make fun of them.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And they're rude.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, they're super rude.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. They're super mean. That's real.

[Eddie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ed Larson]

So that's fine though. But again, it's because they are very. They do. They take their culture very seriously. Yeah, they take it very, very seriously. And we don't.

[Eddie]

Because we shouldn't. No.

[Ed Larson]

Because Guess who had other cultures we don't take seriously.

[Eddie]

Halloween, horror nights.

[Ed Larson]

Any other culture that exists. Yes.

[Eddie]

Because I just don't. Yes, yes.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. I don't. I don't accept you're like lifestyle ever to anyone. That's to all people.

[Eddie]

You know whose lifestyle I. I do accept.

[Ed Larson]

Who?

[Eddie]

Massachusetts. In Barnstable county, during a setup for an annual fireworks show, eight people suffered injuries. Yeah. But that was on July 2nd.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. It doesn't count.

[Eddie]

So that doesn't really count.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. People going too forcing. You know, people like. I still feel like July 4th doesn't need to be a whole weekend. I think it's one of those. It could just be one day.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Unless you got it all. Like, it's nice to have the days off.

[Eddie]

Well, it was on a Friday this year.

[Ed Larson]

I know. It's nice to have the days off.

[Eddie]

And so you start on Thursday.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. If you're.

[Eddie]

You go through to Monday. Yeah. You know, so it's like us suckers.

[Ed Larson]

In the entertainment industry. We got to get back to work. Eddie, you know how hard it is.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Hard is. Especially when there's news happening all over the globe.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And that's why we're introducing our brand new segment here on side stories. Stories. It's called. I don't know if you've ever heard of this.

[Eddie]

Oh, okay.

[Ed Larson]

It's called the Foreign Report. And what we're doing here is. It's just a show. It's for today.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Go listen to the other Foreign report, the real one, where they talk very educatedly about very intense topics. But today's Foreign Report is about crimes from other countries. Because we just wanted to call it this.

[Eddie]

Yeah, yeah. Foreign. It's our Foreign Report.

[Ed Larson]

Yes, it is.

[Eddie]

Yeah. This is what we care about that's happening around the news.

[Ed Larson]

Bees attack French town.

[Eddie]

Town. That's what happened. So now you shouldn't have been rude.

[Ed Larson]

You got to be careful.

[Eddie]

Don't be rude to the bees.

[Ed Larson]

In Oriole, France, an unusual attack by bees. The French town of orilo has left 24 people injured. 24. Three that are in critical condition. They say that it was. They think it was because like a wall, like a wasp nest attacked the bees. Attacked the bees. They said that they've Asian, of course. Racism.

[Eddie]

Whoa.

[Ed Larson]

Because French does have a little bit of. A little touch of it. So this is the mayor of Odila, France. What this person. First they did was that they obviously they had a very big mustache and they have the one little, you know, the little eyeglass and they have A big floppy beret. And they came out. They say, we do believe it is the Asian Hornets because he hit the Asian hornets.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

They don't say just hornets. And how do you know the difference?

[Eddie]

I mean, you gotta call scientists.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. I mean, I don't know. They're being raised racist, maybe. Well, let me look at. All right, here's Asian hornets. I'm looking them up. Asian giant hornets. That's a big old. That's a. You can eat that.

[Eddie]

Big ass hornet. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

You could cut that into little sleeves. You could cut that into slices, man.

[Eddie]

Hornets up. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

All right, so that's an Asian hornet.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And now I'm looking up an American goddamn hornet.

[Eddie]

Yeah. So what's a normal.

[Ed Larson]

Exactly the same.

[Eddie]

Exactly the same. What about. What about the murder hornets? Remember those guys? Remember we cared about that.

[Ed Larson]

Same, just littler.

[Eddie]

Our hornets are. Are a little smaller.

[Ed Larson]

But why are ours called hornets and those are called Asian hornets?

[Eddie]

Well, over there, they're American hornets. What? In Asia they call them American hornets.

[Ed Larson]

Do they?

[Eddie]

Probably not.

[Ed Larson]

It's like American cheese and Swiss cheese. Yeah, one of those. Well, American cheese is just chemicals.

[Eddie]

Yeah. And French fries are Belgian.

[Ed Larson]

Whoa. What the. Got to be kidding me. And so this is a perfect example of. They have. No. Obviously there's no military. There's nothing going on in France. And so they got nothing against the bees. And so the bees just. They had to wait. Think about that. That's also, I think, is amazing. I think it would also happen here. We heard of the police. There was that one beekeeper got pulled over and he released his bees on the police.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Bees are truly the weapon of the proletariat.

[Eddie]

Well, we got to be careful. We can't be using these bees as weapons. We need the bees.

[Ed Larson]

But these bees are fine. If you weaponize the bees, they got nothing. Like, it's the Tommy boy thing. It's a no, is it? Is that Tommy boy? There are thousands of bees. Your weapons are. Bees are our way of beating the government. If we harness the power of bees, they can't do anything to stop us, bro.

[Eddie]

Yeah, well, we don't need bees.

[Ed Larson]

I need bees.

[Eddie]

Seas get degrees.

[Ed Larson]

Cs can't sting. You just gotta get out there.

[Eddie]

You could drown people in the seas.

[Ed Larson]

I would love to drown someone.

[Eddie]

I know my bucket list. Yes, but, but, but that's drowning someone in a bucket. Yes. Yeah. Oh, we got a hornet thing up here. All right, so we got. So you think European hornets. Oh, they're my very different European hornets, actually. Bigger than the Asian hornets.

[Ed Larson]

So why are they blaming the Asian hornets? Why are they so horrible?

[Eddie]

Because the Asian ones are the ones that attacked the European hornets are like, hey, they're smoking cigarettes, having a good time.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. They're like, no, I do not. Mostly I see I have a hypertrophone, a bottle of wine and I watch a child get married. One of my favorite things to do. And yeah. I mean France, they're just trying to throw sauce at it.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And there's nothing they could do because the sauce just brings more bees cream. That's the thing, man. Bees just keep every weapon that they're throwing at them. A consummate beads, a. A nice of blanch duck bees. Like this is. There's nothing they can do do to stop the bees, man. Except wait 30 minutes. Yeah.

[Eddie]

They will go away. They did had to wait for 30.

[Ed Larson]

Minutes for the bees to stop.

[Eddie]

Well, because the bee can only sting you once and it dies sometimes. What do you mean sometimes?

[Ed Larson]

I don't think it happens every time.

[Eddie]

They lose half their ass.

[Ed Larson]

I do. I might be wrong side stories Hill P o t l gmail.com But I believe that sometimes they do like a half ass little like they're suicide bombers. You know when you just put the tip in.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

For fun.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

I think be do that too.

[Eddie]

You think so?

[Ed Larson]

I think they just go like.

[Eddie]

I don't think they can. I think they lose the tip, but.

[Ed Larson]

I don't think they always lose the tip. I think if they go balls deep, if they go abdomen deep.

[Eddie]

No.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Not all bees die after they sting. That's according to Google. AI. And if there's one thing we learned about AI this week and last week, it's super reliable. And it's definitely not an overbearing blown text machine that is just hyped up by commercials.

[Eddie]

Yeah, but I. What am I going to do? Read the whole article. We're in the middle of a show.

[Ed Larson]

I know. Exactly. I don't have time to be also, again, I'm on the toilet. I'm playing my fruit game. Yeah, I don't have time to read every word of every article. This one's not AI this is straight from don't say. Yeah. Yeah. It's from A be wrote this.

[Eddie]

A be wrote this. Our beloved and deadly honeybees, they do not die when they sting.

[Ed Larson]

It is very true. Deadly beautiful hunley bees. Absolutely. They do not all die.

[Eddie]

99.96 of bees did. Why do we talk about it?

[Ed Larson]

Because it was one factoid. One time why do we talk?

[Eddie]

I'm sick of this.

[Ed Larson]

Because it's what happened my whole life.

[Eddie]

I'm like, bees die when they stink. Tell everyone I see.

[Ed Larson]

I know. And everyone's, oh, thanks, Eddie. Thanks for the information. Eddie. Oh, great, Eddie.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. But no, you're wrong. Dead ass. Wrong. I'm right.

[Eddie]

Good for you.

[Ed Larson]

I'm glad those little girls in France are dead. No, they're not. Everyone's out there finding.

[Eddie]

No, they all lived.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, they all got my girls.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And then that. But there was this one old lady's real sick and I think it's because there was like five bees apparently jumped in her. It was an old man. And they immediately resuscitated him. He went down quick, but they brought him back. Huh?

[Eddie]

Huh?

[Ed Larson]

He was wearing a flower costume.

[Eddie]

Yeah, yeah. And he woke up screaming. The hornets. The hornets. Like, sir, actually, it's beast.

[Ed Larson]

He's beast.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

If you got to stop being so racist for a second, you're giving place in hornets.

[Eddie]

Sir, please, sir. Sir, respect the bees.

[Ed Larson]

These are European pervert bees.

[Eddie]

European.

[Ed Larson]

Whoa, that's cute.

[Eddie]

Thank you.

[Ed Larson]

Mo money, less problems.

[Eddie]

Mo money, whole bunch of problems.

[Ed Larson]

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[Eddie]

All right, so something happened that I think should. This is part of my foreign report.

[Ed Larson]

Got.

[Eddie]

Got it. All right. Egypt.

[Ed Larson]

Okay, Eddie. Eddie, really innocent to this story.

[Eddie]

Innocent. Innocent. Egypt.

[Ed Larson]

We know that. We know that Egypt. If anybody's been to Egypt, we know that it's innocent. Not a complicated country at all.

[Eddie]

Egypt has arrested a belly dancer because she's a belly dancer.

[Ed Larson]

No, the. This is.

[Eddie]

This is where belly dancing was invented. This is where it existed. Now, this. This.

[Ed Larson]

What's her name again?

[Eddie]

Linda Martino. Oh, my mother's name. Linda Martino.

[Ed Larson]

She's Italian.

[Eddie]

She's half Italian. She's half Egyptian, half Italian.

[Ed Larson]

Now, Eddie. The way Eddie reacted to Linda Martino, she's very.

[Eddie]

She's very nice. She seems like a good woman.

[Ed Larson]

Eddie was. Was very.

[Eddie]

This woman is so hot, they put her in prison.

[Ed Larson]

This is what he's saying.

[Eddie]

This is. This is what happened.

[Ed Larson]

So she's.

[Eddie]

This is Bella dancing.

[Ed Larson]

Come closer. I want to shake your hand. I want to shake your hand. I love what you do. Just the isolated stomach vibration.

[Eddie]

My friend's mother's name is Linda. She's newly single.

[Ed Larson]

Now, what is it. Now what is it about her seductive tendencies? What. What makes her different than the other ones?

[Eddie]

Well, I think they were just. She's too popular.

[Ed Larson]

She's got 2.2 million. Yeah.

[Eddie]

Instagram. All right. And she's. So. They said that she's accused of violating public morals for her art.

[Ed Larson]

Honestly, if that ain't a commercial. Commercial. Oh, my God. Your services. I have never heard one. Come to America. Yeah, she said that she was a America. I promise you, it is almost the same as Egypt now. You're gonna love it. We have so much conservatism everywhere. Yeah, you're gonna feel right at home, like you're gonna just roll in. Oh, whoa.

[Eddie]

Australia.

[Ed Larson]

Whoa. She really can't quite jiggle, huh?

[Eddie]

Yes, she's very talented.

[Ed Larson]

I'm looking at her right now.

[Eddie]

Yeah, she's very talented.

[Ed Larson]

That's very different.

[Eddie]

Please follow.

[Ed Larson]

Well, yeah, she does sort of like. You know how to bring it back to bees, huh? Bees shake to come to sort of communicate where honey is. So where Asian hornets are. Yes, I guess to. To racially profile them, but this.

[Eddie]

She does look like she has two beehives on her chest.

[Ed Larson]

She does. See, I look like I'm wearing her skirt because she's really wiggling back and forth. She's got quite the shape. Yes, well, Cairo really got quite the shape. You were.

[Eddie]

Cairo said. They accused her of using seduction techniques and provocative dancing to incite vice.

[Ed Larson]

Linda Martino, what I have to do to get you to America.

[Eddie]

What's the point of belly dancing?

[Ed Larson]

What is the point of this? We will bring you to America. Please let me have you.

[Eddie]

Oh, man.

[Ed Larson]

We're gonna give you to our politicians.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

We're gonna give you up there. And then you're gonna work for the people. You're going to. Going to. You're going to flip them from the inside out.

[Eddie]

Yeah. And you know what? Honestly, her videos aren't that bad.

[Ed Larson]

Well, she's just jiggling. She's doing.

[Eddie]

She's belly dancing.

[Ed Larson]

She's very talented. She could shake very minutely. She claims she does little miniature shakes that really are quite interesting.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Now I'm watching this. Now I'm fully invested.

[Eddie]

Yes, I followed. I did follow. Oh, Eddie, I.

[Ed Larson]

Well, what do you know?

[Eddie]

She's an artist, a following artist. You're allowed. Belly dancing's allowed out.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, no. I know.

[Eddie]

No, tell me it's. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. Everything is by belly dancing. This is a quote from. From Linda herself. Belly dancing is an art. It cannot be a crime. I am a dancer. And the videos on which the accusations are based are normal. They show a dance performance. Do not go against or violate.

[Ed Larson]

I am watching her fully clothed.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

And she is very essential.

[Eddie]

She is some so hot that they had to put her in prison. Whoa.

[Ed Larson]

But, yeah, she might be a handful, literally. She might be a difficult lady. But you know what? God bless her.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

There is no reason to arrest her for belly dancing in Egypt.

[Eddie]

No. That's the land of belly dancing. If you can't belly dance in Egypt, then where are you going to do it?

[Ed Larson]

I don't know. Mar a lago, because that's where she's going next. Yeah. She will very much be purchased by the US Government if she allows it. So Linda. Gotta love you.

[Eddie]

She has. She's half Italian, and so the Italians are trying to save her. You know, the Italian's like, no, no, no. Do you give her back?

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, no, we get it. Yes.

[Eddie]

Fully clothed.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Eddie]

But still seems nude.

[Ed Larson]

You know what? She's just very beautiful. She is very like. That is the essence of the sensuality of belly dancing, but also the artistry. And I celebrate her.

[Eddie]

Leave Linda alone.

[Ed Larson]

Leave Linda alone. All right, so we got one more foreign report. Evelyn alone we all love her. It's our little segment when we talk about a woman that makes us horny and then we're allowed. That's Eddie's story. We're allowed. It's our show.

[Eddie]

It's Egypt's story. So they it up.

[Ed Larson]

One last part of the forward report is so the UK between the gimp man of Somerset, the standing man of that other place. I forgot what it was. You remember the guy that just stood in traffic? Yes. That guy that said nothing and everyone didn't know what to do about him.

[Eddie]

Man, he really. I kind of dig him.

[Ed Larson]

I miss that guy. I wouldn't know where he is. But there's a new, there is a new wriggling man man in the UK that they don't like. His name as they're going by is the Panther Man. Panther man striking fear as he leaps from behind gravestones in Merseyside. Now for those of you that if you're in the uk, this is in the Wallasey Beach Mercy side. Now I don't quite know where this is. It's in a. It's a, it's a beachside graveyard which is actually pretty cool.

[Eddie]

Hell yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And so this guy wearing a cat mask. Mask and a skin side black suit.

[Eddie]

Yeah, a whole cat suit. Yes.

[Ed Larson]

They show him he resembles a banshee, an urban jaguar. That's what someone called him. That was one of them. And the urban jaguar.

[Eddie]

You're too creative. Yeah. It's a dude in a skin tight suit. Yes.

[Ed Larson]

They're trying to hunt him or it down. People are really, they don't like it because they think it's, it's like for everyone's sightings, the Panther man is harmless.

[Eddie]

Does look scary.

[Ed Larson]

I really don't think he's dangerous, just strange. And so what he does is that he hops out from behind graveyards from gravestones, rolls around on the ground meowing, wriggling and meowing and touching himself fully.

[Eddie]

Clothed, literally toe to toe to toe.

[Ed Larson]

But again, in UK we've talked about this, about the idea of someone putting their sort of sexuality on you. They, they view that as a form of sexual assault and so, so illuminated by torch. He said one time a photo that she took of this lady they saw, they took a picture, he's illuminated by torchlight. Everyone in that nan seems to have seen him. There are loads of posts as people are trying to hunt him or it down. I don't know about more recent incidences but there are people saying he jumped out from behind gravestones at Erlston Cemetery.

[Eddie]

Right.

[Ed Larson]

And he said, I didn't feel really scared. He was just waving his arm and making panther noises. I felt more confused and stabbed than scat. Now, I went through a stage of doing this years ago, but now I've gone through it. Don't ask me meow. That's what a couple of people were saying. And so it's. But he's literally just going.

[Eddie]

When you go to a graveyard at night, there's gonna be weird things there. If there's anything. If there's anything there.

[Ed Larson]

So you're saying that are asking for it.

[Eddie]

I'm not saying they're looking for it.

[Ed Larson]

You say every time you go to a graveyard in the middle there might.

[Eddie]

Be a panther man. That's all I'm saying.

[Ed Larson]

But the guy did was a bear den.

[Eddie]

And I got mad that there were bears inside.

[Ed Larson]

That's different. You're not going to a panther den. You're not going to a panther graveyard. If you want your occupied graveyard, it is now. Yes. Joshua Hunt, who was the Somerset gimp he actually got. He was just not allowed to wear like his major. You know, his. His punishment is that he's bad for five years wearing masks or dressing in all in one black outfits at night, or crawling, wriggling, writhing on the ground. That is literally what he is. That's the issue.

[Eddie]

Do you think he's the panther man?

[Ed Larson]

It's gotta be.

[Eddie]

He's a suspect in my opinion.

[Ed Larson]

Well, more give them all standing them on the street. Now. I'm a bit of a penta. Yeah, sure. I'm a bit of a penta. Which you want for me then.

[Eddie]

All right.

[Ed Larson]

That's it. All right. I'm a. He's a bit of a panther, isn't it? Right. Because he just goes up there and he goes. I also feel like panther man is a big jump.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

These guys are all saying urban jaguar and panther and stuff like that. He's a cat.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Not even.

[Ed Larson]

That's a cat.

[Eddie]

He's a dude in a skin tight trash bag.

[Ed Larson]

That's a guy in a cat. Okay. He's a man face cat. That's what he is. That's a man face cat.

[Eddie]

Get out of his graveyard. He's a black cat. Hang out in the graveyard hanging out. He's where he's supposed to be.

[Ed Larson]

He's friendly, looking for belly rubs. It's a two way street. You gotta provide the belly rubs for them to happen.

[Eddie]

Go visit your dead loved ones during the day. Unless you're a panther man.

[Ed Larson]

Then you visit them at night. And if you're gonna go to the graveyard at night, bring food.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Give it to the Panther Man. He'll leave you alone.

[Eddie]

Honestly, has anyone even brought a can of Friskies? Anyone?

[Ed Larson]

Just try jerking him off once.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Just to end it. Because the second you jerk him off, he gets to stop being Panther man for the night. And then you'd be like, thank you. It has been. Honestly, it has been a day.

[Eddie]

Now I can go back to being a dog.

[Ed Larson]

Bring me dinners. Bring me dinners down. Well, I'm really glad that. I think our foreign report's better than theirs.

[Eddie]

It is, it is, but I think it's more informative. But go and check out the foreign reports. See if they. See if they hold account to what we do. Yes. Cuz I really. I mean, are they. They. They're full of. Right.

[Ed Larson]

I think that anybody. Because, you know, this is the whole thing.

[Eddie]

It is.

[Ed Larson]

There's a lot of stuff going on in international politics.

[Eddie]

Politics.

[Ed Larson]

And I don't understand it. And as far as I'm concerned, nobody does.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Because I don't. And I'm the smartest guy I know. No. Go listen to the foreign report. They know what they're talking about.

[Eddie]

Yeah. See you in the graveyard, folks. Wear all black.

[Ed Larson]

If you could let me. All right, so we got some. Do we want to do some listener emails?

[Eddie]

Yeah, one or two.

[Ed Larson]

All right, let's go.

[Eddie]

Just. No, no. Jerk.

[Ed Larson]

Let's try a new one. Let's try a new listener email stuff. Stinger. Yeah, it was a good stinger. Who did that one? Same guy, Chris Tapia. Good work.

[Eddie]

I like that one a lot more, I think.

[Ed Larson]

Okay. It's good. It's quick.

[Eddie]

Can I hear it again? Actually?

[Ed Larson]

Sure. I only got one. I only got one that funky.

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Ed Larson]

I want to get one that's funky. Send some funky ones. Yeah, funky. There we go. Here we go.

[Eddie]

Here's one. Okay.

[Ed Larson]

First of all, the email that I got back from about people working on. In the AI world. World. I gotta say, I've never been correct. Right. Never been right ever on this show. I'm so used to not being right on this show that people. You know, I'm so used to getting yelled at. I want to say it's the first time I've been collectively agreed with by multiple experts in a field.

[Eddie]

Wow.

[Ed Larson]

In a very, very long time.

[Eddie]

Congratulations.

[Ed Larson]

Every litter I got. I'm not even joking. 25 emails about people working within. In the AI world and in AI technology that all say the Same exact thing. It is literally going to do nothing. It is almost all entirely hype. And the main issue right now is that they are just trying to figure out how to replace workers entirely. Yeah. Which they could figure out how to. That's mostly they want to try to do. But the problem is, is that the chat bots aren't even good enough yet. Yet to do the most basic form of job except for sucking dick. This is.

[Eddie]

No, that's the sound of you sucking your own dick.

[Ed Larson]

I'm correct. And it's nice. It's nice. Just remember, there's no reason to be afraid of AI. It's stupid.

[Eddie]

All right, so what people say, that.

[Ed Larson]

Was just really it.

[Eddie]

That's it. Or male is. I'm right.

[Ed Larson]

Basically. They won't know. No, I got mail. Also, just understand one big thing about chatbots and only fans. I got several people from Only fans that say, just understand that 95 to 99% of the time that you believe that you're talking to a female or a living male human on an Only fans account. You are not. So just remember that when they are just saying things you want to hear. So this is the. This is the. Another email.

[Eddie]

Okay. We haven't gotten to one yet. Just so people know.

[Ed Larson]

Yep, I did. I summed them up. I've thought about sending this email for a while. And with the recent research of Annabelle and Robert in the Aether, I couldn't help myself any longer. My dad lives about 30 minutes south of Salt Lake City.

[Eddie]

Hey. Oh.

[Ed Larson]

Coming soon. And claims to have the most haunted collection in Utah, possibly the entire collection country. His words, not mine. But also maybe mine, because you did.

[Eddie]

Write it and put it in an email to us. So they are yours now.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. A little context. A little context. My dad grew up lds, but ditched the church the second he could, only to fall head first into the satanic panic. The Warren. An enduring belief in Catholic exorcism and relics. Despite hating the Catholic Church with the fiery rage of a thousand sons. He thinks the institution is corrupt and ridiculous. Kill us. But if something goes bump in the night, you better believe he's breaking out the holy water and crucifixes. It's complicated, okay? He's at a lifetime of weird encounters. UFOs, Ouija boards. I won't leave unexplained phenomena. You name it.

[Eddie]

Strokes.

[Ed Larson]

Yep. But no. Who knows?

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Ed Larson]

About 14 years. About 14 years ago, he started collecting dolls.

[Eddie]

Oh.

[Ed Larson]

Most are from ebay, a few came from antique stores, and the rest are mine. And my sister's childhood friends rip Door Peaceful Sleep. Each one has a name, which they've allegedly shared with him, and he believes that each has its own spirit. He's got a designated doll room through several though several dolls and other haunted objects are scattered around the house. A few are even playing poker. I've attached a short video of the room from last year so you can see the setup. It is fun. Now, I know this could be chalked up to a lonely old man energy, but I grew up in that house and experienced plenty of unexplainable stuff long before the dolls moved to in. There's definitely a vibe when you walk through the door, and weird things still happen. If you pause the video around four seconds, you'll see some tall candles bent in unnatural angles. I've watched them slowly change shape over time.

[Eddie]

It's probably hot in there.

[Ed Larson]

They've never been lit and they're still firmly in their holders. So make of that what you will.

[Eddie]

No air conditioning.

[Ed Larson]

That's very hot, though. It would. I would say that would be very hot. He also has a problem child cat cabinet, a collection of objects he says won't play well with others, and he believes he's keeping their energy in check. My sister and I roll our eyes, but we also secretly worry the house might implode when he dies.

[Eddie]

There's a problem child merch.

[Ed Larson]

It's. Yes, I do think it is. That would be very frightening. Anyway, he's a kooky, funny guy who loves sharing his haunted treasures, and he has a great sense of humor about it all. Since. And since you'll be in the area soon, I figured I'd extend the invitation. If you're up for it. He'd be thrilled to give you a tour. Who knows? I got time.

[Eddie]

Yeah, we do have time.

[Ed Larson]

I do. So who knows? I actually might reach out to you. But the video is interesting. You do see, it's very haunted little room. The crooked candles are there, but you just have to decide whether or not you believe in something like that. And actually, I forgot to make the this comment last week and everyone's killing me. So we are going to put out beyond the Veil.

[Eddie]

Oh, yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Entirely uncut with our commentary. The reason why we just haven't done it is that we did not know how we were going to release it. And then when we decided we wanted to do the commentary on it, it landed in the middle of me producing, truly producing, a massive project that I have yet to tell you guys about that is going to be released. Next month that I think everyone's going to be very excited for. But it's like happening right in the middle of me producing that thing.

[Eddie]

Yeah, we're doing a bunch of other things too.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. So once that's done, which is about two weeks. Weeks, we're going to record the commentary and then put it up. So everyone's like, good, put it. But because we haven't, we haven't gotten to it yet.

[Eddie]

We're going to get to it how much people want to see something they didn't like.

[Ed Larson]

But also I think it's funny that they immediately assume very intense, ornate conspiracy theories about why we didn't put it out. When it's like everybody involved with Absolutely Fine and everybody on our side actually had a great time.

[Eddie]

I love that.

[Ed Larson]

It's like one of those where it's like we all had a fantastic time. Everybody was like, I understand that it was that people just were like obviously kind of driven crazy by it.

[Eddie]

But that's part of life. You know, it is fun to watch strangers over analyze your life constantly.

[Ed Larson]

That's our lives.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

But yeah, don't worry, it's coming out.

[Eddie]

I got a. There was a list email for me. It's a short one. I'd like to just, you know, if.

[Ed Larson]

You don't mind, please.

[Eddie]

Eddie asked if hospital jail counts as time served. While I don't have a straight answer, I once spent a couple months in county with a guy who tried to commit suicide by jumping off a five story parking ramp. He stepped off and shattered both legs. He was drunk and on parole at the time, so as soon as the hospital cleared him, they brought him to jail and put him in gen pop. The poor guy had both of his legs in cast and just sadly wheeled himself around. He did make good snack trades with his pain pills though.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, I bet. No, that dude. Oh, I didn't even get into how there's a full extended video of that dude fallen and actually breaking his legs. And he did steal a pair of sunglasses from Neiman Marcus. And it was. He was posting, I feel like are.

[Eddie]

Like the one thing we could still make fun of him for stealing.

[Ed Larson]

Utterly. And he was just posting about how like they, they don't have the balls to come get me. They don't have the balls come get me. And then the cops came and got him and because he was posting live and then, yeah, when he jumped and those spaghetti legs, man, that. It's just. Still, I've. I've been watching it just to crack myself up.

[Eddie]

It's it was pretty intense. So watch. Yeah. When you jump, apparently you're not supposed to. You can't have your knees locked.

[Ed Larson]

You really shouldn't.

[Eddie]

You can't have your knees locked, but you're jumping on ice. So you would have just cracked his tailbone if he did. The knees.

[Ed Larson]

I saw a lot of people being like, that's how out of shape that man was.

[Eddie]

Oh.

[Ed Larson]

That's how thin and spindly his little legs were. And he literally could not do it, so.

[Eddie]

Oh.

[Ed Larson]

But I was still laughing about it.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Well, also. Yeah. Just so you know, there's a band on Spotify called the Velvet Sundown, which is fake.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Fake AI Just, you know, if you.

[Eddie]

See that pop up, there's a couple other bands too.

[Ed Larson]

So. Live every day knowing for a fact that you might not know what's real or what's fake. You're going to love the fact that the. The evidence that the US government put out to prove that Epstein was not. He was not murdered actually is an extremely useful field of vision to create an AI cut or any form of editing. It's actually one of the easiest types of frames. As you can see. It's an entirely empty middle frame with some things right in the foreground that makes it really easy to change whatever it is going on inside the.

[Eddie]

But even there's still a blip somehow.

[Ed Larson]

Going to love that. You're going to laugh about the fact that it's just like they're just telling you that there's a minute missing and they don't care because you think it's so. It's just. You're going to laugh your ass off knowing for a fact that there's nobody in charge and you better just take care of your own crew as much as you possibly can.

[Eddie]

Yep. That is the MO mantra these days.

[Ed Larson]

Yep. Oh, yeah.

[Eddie]

It's real sad.

[Ed Larson]

But we'll get there. We just got to take care of our friends and our. And our communities.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Reinvest in your local. Local community.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Stay. Stay local and support local politicians too, because they grow up to be horrible people.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. That's their job. Yeah.

[Eddie]

Yeah. So. Yeah. So know that you started there.

[Ed Larson]

Someone's gonna go find Mom. Donnie. Make him scared to up.

[Eddie]

I mean, I think he is scared already.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Eddie]

They're coming for his ass.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah. They came for him so much harder than Jeffrey Epstein.

[Eddie]

I know.

[Ed Larson]

And they came for him so much harder than anybody else.

[Eddie]

They just don't. They realize that they just make it a more powerful and popular. Yes.

[Ed Larson]

No, no, no. They don't. They don't understand.

[Eddie]

It's so stupid.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. But it's also just, you know, if.

[Eddie]

You ignored them and just gave a bunch of money to Eric Adams, you'd probably win. Yep. But you're too dumb.

[Ed Larson]

But they just don't understand. But we'll see.

[Eddie]

We'll see.

[Ed Larson]

See how it goes. So go to patreon.com lastpodcast and left to watch us flap. Go to lastpodcastleft.com come and see us live.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Our show. Our show at Wise Guys in Salt Lake City. Sold out.

[Eddie]

Asheville. Sold out.

[Ed Larson]

Sold out. Come and see the last podcast and left live JK Ultra at. In Salt Lake City this Saturday.

[Eddie]

That's right. Yeah. We're gonna be at the Sandy Amphitheater in Salt Lake City on July 12th.

[Ed Larson]

It's gonna be warm. We're all gonna be dressed appropriately.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

We're gonna get sweaty. And I can't wait to see you wet.

[Eddie]

Yeah. It's gonna be outside and it's gonna be hot. So come on with it. I'm gonna wear shorts on stage. I'm gonna do it.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah, you're gonna wear shorts on stage?

[Eddie]

I'm gonna wear shorts on stage.

[Ed Larson]

Hey, that's a. That's the biggest rule break in the world.

[Eddie]

I'm gonna wear shorts.

[Ed Larson]

Shitty improv. People do that.

[Eddie]

Yeah, dude. I'm gonna turn into that. I am shitty. I'm shitty and improv. We learned that in Atlanta.

[Ed Larson]

Well, honestly, you are. You did very well.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Also, we got our North Carolina tour coming up. Asheville is sold out. But come see last podcast on the Left live at Charlotte at the night theater on August 8th. Or. Or us at Durham in August 9th at the Carolina Theater will be there. And then we got lots of shows coming up. The our show in Kansas City for side stories. Not sold out yet at the Truman. That's going to be on September 21st. Get tickets to. To that. Tickets are now on sale officially finally on sale. October 24th, Redway, California. We're coming back to the MAT Community Center. This is our first repeat.

[Ed Larson]

I'm excited, you and I. I'm very excited. Super excited and know more now of how to do that show. And so it'll be very, very fun.

[Eddie]

And then also, of course, on November 30th, we'll be at the Columbus, Ohio Newport Music Hall. So come and check us out. That's going to be the Sunday after Thanksgiving. And of course, crime [e-mail] left to come see us on a Royal Caribbean cruise departing out of Fort Lauderdale November 3rd through November 7th. Wow. We got more coming down the pipeline, so keep your eyes peeled for what Henry and I got going on the Cincinnati stand up show that I'm doing. Sold out as well. That's amazing. So thank you everyone who bought tickets to that. I wish we could have fit more people in there, but, you know, there's only a certain amount of people that could fit inside the Ryan guys brewery hall. We got. Travis Irvine's gonna be there. I love it. I can't wait. Reed Failure is going to be there. It's going to be a lot of fun. And of course, get tickets to Dead Men Tell some Tales out here in Los Angeles on August 21, 7:30pm at the Elysian Theater. That is my Disney history show where I'm just going to, you know, ruin it. They're going to ban me.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

So, yeah. I don't know why I've chosen to do this to myself, but I have. Please come out.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. You're signing. You're going to cut yourself off from your own supply, dude, I know you got to be careful, but I got.

[Eddie]

A cast member real happy, said they're going to sign me into Disney for free. I'm very excited. So it's immediately worth it.

[Ed Larson]

Yep. Good.

[Eddie]

It's immediately.

[Ed Larson]

That's all matter.

[Eddie]

That's all I wanted.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah, of course. No, that's why we do anything. Also, Michael Madsen died of a heart attack.

[Eddie]

Good. Officially, I mean, not good, but, like, I'm glad it wasn't something worse.

[Ed Larson]

Cocaine. Yeah.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Well, I mean, cocaine.

[Ed Larson]

He was exacerbated by his alcoholism and his former drug uses. Yeah, but he was sober. He was.

[Eddie]

He was sober. And I watched Hateful eight the other night. He's awesome.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, he's great.

[Eddie]

He's just cool. Dude, I can't wait.

[Ed Larson]

Great movie. It's a great movie. All right, guys.

[Eddie]

Love all of you very much. Hail sweet Satan and hail Michael Madsen. Even though I'm not sure if I should.

[Ed Larson]

These keys, you know, we're all complicated. But these more complicated than some hell.

[Eddie]

I mean, anyway, hence we say.

[Ed Larson]

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[Henry Zabrowski]

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