Side Stories: One Story After Another

Summary

Last Podcast On The Left: Side Stories

Episode: "One Story After Another"

Release Date: October 8, 2025
Hosts: Henry Zebrowski & Ed Larson

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Overview

This episode is a classic "Side Stories": a fast-paced, comedic, and irreverent ride through recent true crime and weird news, with the hosts weaving in personal anecdotes, listener emails, debates on morality, and, of course, a healthy helping of horror movie banter. The central theme is a mix of Halloween horror movie marathons, recent headlines ranging from drone sightings to bizarre crimes, and the joy of sharing spooky listener-submitted ghost stories. As always, the tone is darkly humorous, self-deprecating, and unapologetically ridiculous.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Halloween Movie Marathons: "31 for 31"

[01:18–14:23]

• The hosts discuss their annual October quest to watch 31 horror movies in 31 days.
• Debate on nostalgia vs. quality in horror movies:
  • Some childhood favorites (“The Gate,” “Sleepaway Camp 2”) don’t hold up, but that’s embraced as part of the "spirit of Halloween."
  • "Even the ones I said I did not like...I'm glad I watched all of them." – Ed Larson [11:51]
• Insight into personal horror tastes:
  • Ed prefers some 70s and older horror, while Henry admits he needs “action, tits, blood, and brains” to stay engaged past 8:30pm [04:28].
• Fun trivia about actors and movies (Tom Atkins getting “so much pussy,” Pamela Springsteen’s odd career arc).
• Horror streaming woes and the return of local video stores:
  • Ed laments digital availability, resolves to frequent “Be Kind, Rewind,” his neighborhood video rental.
  • “Why am I going to give Apple five bucks when I can give this fucking dude with a pile of DVDs five bucks?” – Ed Larson [14:03]

2. Listener Story: The Aaron Hernandez Brush

[14:27–18:37]

• Listener email: woman unknowingly reprimands Aaron Hernandez for not paying at a Patriots Place escape room, only to later find out he’s arrested for murder.
• Henry is amused by the sheer number of listeners with “murderer run-in” stories.
• Larger point: Fame brings criminals into more “ordinary” contact with people.
• "Across the board, he was a piece of shit... Not a single person said, 'I had a good, good interaction with Aaron Hernandez.'" – Henry Zebrowski [18:00]

3. Ed's Restaurant Story: Hosting NFL Bad Boys

[18:37–20:14]

• Ed recounts managing a sports bar that hosted Ray Lewis and Ray Rice, reflecting on the duality of welcoming celebrities with dark pasts.
• The nervousness and gallows humor about assigning “the scariest” football players to the nicest server.

4. Recent True Crime & Weird News Updates

a) Drone Invasions at European Airports

[22:13–30:23]

• Multiple drone sightings shut down major European airports (Munich, Copenhagen).
• National security concerns: Unclear whether these are Russian military drones, UFOs, or something else.
• Conspiracy riff: “If I was an alien and they saw that we had all these drones, why not try to make shit that looks like our shit?” – Ed Larson [24:45]
• Discussion expands into US military UFO sightings and congressional reactions: skepticism about politicians, mockery of those discussing UFOs in public.
• Reflection on how the “answer” to these drone/UFO questions will never be made public:
  • “Somebody got the answer and we’re not allowed to know what it is.” – Henry Zebrowski [30:02]

b) Morality Debate: Man Holds Dog-Killer Hostage

[34:06–43:53]

• A Texas man (Alberto Joshua Hernandez, 22) forcibly makes another man bury his dog and withdraw money after the man accidentally ran over the dog.
• Hosts launch into a nuanced, darkly comedic debate about vengeance, grief, and empathy for the dog’s owner.
• "I do sympathize and understand where he's coming from." – Ed Larson [40:16]
• Both hosts admit they can imagine losing control if their own beloved dogs were killed, balancing gallows humor with honesty about grief and loss.
• Legal technicalities: Ed and Henry speculate on jail time, focusing on where the "line" is legally (the ATM withdrawal, not just the gunpoint burial).
• Notable: The hosts distinguish between grief-driven crime and outright malice, urging listeners to see both sides.

c) Teen Texts After Double Murder: “jk”

[44:56–45:48]

• Brief but chilling news: A Pennsylvania teen murders his mother and her friend, then texts his girlfriend “I just killed my parents – jk,” turning out not to be joking.
• Used to segue (in classic fashion) into shameless plugs for live tour dates.

d) Dockworker, Subway Sandwich, and Penis Scandal

[54:08–58:12]

• Australian dock worker fired, then rehired, after (allegedly) putting his penis in a coworker's Subway sandwich and showing bikini photos of female colleagues.
• Hosts riff on the irreverence of Australian workplace culture, questioning evidence: “There’s no proof unless you got mustard on your balls.” – Henry Zebrowski [56:18]
• Wraps with self-aware commentary on workplace tribunals and men's clubby code of silence.

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5. Listener Spooky Stories: “Listener Pasta”

[58:19–68:47]

• The hosts kick off a new segment: "Listener Pastas," reading audience-submitted ghost and paranormal encounters.
• Example 1: Twerking handstand at a girls' night triggers pounding on the door and odd poltergeist activity, including ghostly coins and flying mail.
  • Ed: “Maybe the ghost likes strippers, literally...he’s throwing money at her.” [63:09]
• Example 2: A classic “woman-in-white” haunting in a University of Wisconsin dorm, supported by a video sent in years later. Both hosts reflect on personal beliefs and the suggestibility of young adults in unfamiliar settings.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On nostalgia and bad horror films:
  "That is the one thing about horror movies is I can watch a really bad one and just be like, oh, okay. I feel good about that." – Ed Larson [01:44]

• On male leads in '80s horror movies:
  "Tom Atkins gets so much pussy in every movie he’s in. There’s something about Tom Atkins." – Henry Zabrowski [06:32]

• On streaming vs. physical media:
  "Why am I going to give Apple five bucks when I can give this fucking dude with a pile of DVDs five bucks?” – Ed Larson [14:03]

• On the accidental dog killing in Texas:
  "He's the villain... But you're the villain because you love too much. The love is so big." – Henry Zabrowski [38:49]

• On US politicians and UFO hearings:
  "The problem is all the guys I gotta talk to like that—everybody’s a fucking child molester, fucking crazy person...they’re all just sitting at home doing jack dick loving life..." – Henry Zabrowski [29:18]

• On grisly real life intersecting with the comedy brand:
  "It’s not funny to sell tickets [as a murder joke]." – Henry Zabrowski [46:04]

• On supernatural twerking poltergeists:
  “Maybe the ghost likes strippers, literally...he’s throwing money at her." – Ed Larson [63:09]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Segment | Topic | Timestamp | |---|---|---| | 01:18 | Halloween horror marathon starts | [01:18] | | 03:29 | Explaining the marathon "rubric" | [03:29] | | 10:32 | Best of seven watched: Night of the Living Dead '90 | [10:32] | | 13:56 | Ed's local video store solution | [13:56] | | 14:27 | Listener’s Aaron Hernandez encounter | [14:27] | | 18:37 | Ed's NFL player celebrity restaurant story | [18:37] | | 22:13 | Drone shutdowns in Europe | [22:13] | | 24:45 | Alien/drones conspiracy riff | [24:45] | | 34:06 | Texas dog killing/kidnapping debate | [34:06] | | 44:56 | Teen “jk” murder text | [44:56] | | 54:08 | Australian dock worker and Subway sandwich scandal | [54:08] | | 58:19 | Listener ghost stories (“Listener Pastas”) | [58:19] | | 70:45 | Live show and tour plugs | [70:45] |

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Overall Tone & Style

• Dark humor, irreverence, and boundary-pushing banter
• Freely mixing the macabre, the absurd, and the personal
• Sincere passion for horror and the weirder side of life
• Confessional moments of vulnerability (on grief, aging, mental health)
• Audience participation encouraged – both in content contributions and live events

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For First-Time Listeners

This episode is an exemplar of the “Side Stories” style: a blend of true crime, horror culture, dark comedy, and spontaneous tangents. The hosts fearlessly veer between earnest debate (on grief and morality), off-color jokes, and genuine affection for their community—whether that’s listeners, fellow horror fans, or the local video store guy.

There's no required knowledge of prior episodes; new listeners can jump right in and enjoy the hosts’ unique voices, riotous chemistry, and their particular brand of cathartic, communal weirdness.

Transcript

[Ed Larson]

They say if you want to go fast, go alone. But if you want to go far, go together. At Amica Insurance, we're built for our customers and prioritize your needs. Call 877-41-America for a free coverage review. New vitamin water, zero sugar. Pineapple passion fruit is packed with vitamins. Just like the amount of peas we packed. In that sentence, it's packed like your tote bag but the one you stole from your ex or your overpriced half.

[Henry Zabowski]

A studio apartment or extra rushed rush hour traffic packed. Like your calendar.

[Ed Larson]

Triple booked at 5, of course. Grab a vitamin water. Did we mention it's packed with vitamins? There's no place to escape to. This is the last podcast on the left side stories.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories, yes. All right, guys, we are rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling. Oh, rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling.

[Ed Larson]

Break stuff.

[Henry Zabowski]

Break stuff. Break it.

[Ed Larson]

Break the stuff.

[Henry Zabowski]

Break the stuff.

[Ed Larson]

Break the stuff.

[Henry Zabowski]

Eddie, how is your 31 for 31 treating you?

[Ed Larson]

Oh, you know, it's fine. I. I think of a lot of these movies I put on there for nostalgia sake.

[Henry Zabowski]

Same.

[Ed Larson]

And they don't hold up.

[Henry Zabowski]

But the key here is with Halloween movies is that they don't have to be the scariest movies. They don't have to be the best.

[Ed Larson]

With it being bad.

[Henry Zabowski]

Honestly, it's Halloween. Yeah. And it's about celebrating Halloween each time you watch one.

[Ed Larson]

That is the one thing about horror movies is I can watch a really bad one and just be like, oh, okay. I feel good about that.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. I don't get offended at the end of it.

[Ed Larson]

But there are some of these movies as I'm now 44 as of this weekend.

[Henry Zabowski]

First of all, give a big old congratulations to Ed Larson for not eating himself alive to death. He did it. He did it. He beat food.

[Ed Larson]

I am as old as Himmler was. Wow. Congrats when he was executed.

[Henry Zabowski]

Congrats. Today's Himmler's birthday.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, today is Himmler's birthday.

[Henry Zabowski]

Happy birthday.

[Ed Larson]

I'm so happy. I don't have the same birthday as Himmler.

[Henry Zabowski]

It was close. Real close. Your mommy was really watching that clock.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, she was. I don't think I would. If I were to cook two more days, who knows how big I'd be.

[Henry Zabowski]

Would have been. Oh, wow. Yeah. Welcome to side Stories. My name is Henry Zabowski. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. Almost seven movies.

[Henry Zabowski]

He's my almost birthday twin with Heinrich Himler.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yes. Almost.

[Henry Zabowski]

Almost bir.

[Ed Larson]

Almost know who I got. I got another war criminal, Chester a. Arthur. Oh, him 21. President, you piece of crap. I guess he's fine. Maybe.

[Henry Zabowski]

I don't know.

[Ed Larson]

I don't know anything about him, to be honest with you.

[Henry Zabowski]

I just. Like a president whose first name rhymes with Brester.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Come on. Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Come on.

[Ed Larson]

Where my dudes at? Yeah, baby. Oh, yeah. Brester. Hey, Arthur. But ye. I watched. I watched the Gate because I wanted to, like, you know, Rob really likes the gate, and I talk on it and I'm like, all right, maybe I should watch it again.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah, you did that.

[Ed Larson]

It was slightly better than I remember, but still was not good.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's for children.

[Ed Larson]

It's for children. But the demons look cool. I would like to have one of those little demons in my house. I feel well. You do. I think that would be yes. Tootsie.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

If I shave Tootsie, she would look like that. She's got the horn on her head and everything. I watched the Strangers. Kaka.

[Henry Zabowski]

The thing about the strangers. I watched the strangers.

[Ed Larson]

Strangers.

[Henry Zabowski]

For those of you that don't know, we have put together a very intense Rubric for our 31. For 31. Provided to me by Jackie Zabrowski.

[Ed Larson]

I think next year we go back to our old ways.

[Henry Zabowski]

I feel like there's a good mixture. This one.

[Ed Larson]

I'm just putting a whole series in there.

[Henry Zabowski]

Me too. I actually really do too. But this was. I feel like this was a good exercise as a way to spread it around. How to pick different styles of horror movies that we genuinely wouldn't see. Like. Yeah, because to me, I have to force myself to watch old horror movies because I have to remember.

[Ed Larson]

What do you consider old, 70s and before.

[Henry Zabowski]

No, I actually consider. I'm talking like 6050s, like, hammer. That style of movie I. I've watched very little.

[Ed Larson]

An afternoon. I'm in.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's my favorite.

[Ed Larson]

It's an after. But if it's at night, I can't do it.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's the problem is that I think, like, literally after 39, the year of age is that if a black and white movie is on after 8:30pm I'm asleep, asleep, asleep. I can't even. Because again, it's not that gripping.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Even like, if it's like pie, I'm asleep.

[Henry Zabowski]

I need to see tits. I need to see blood. I need to see brains. I need to see, like, in order to keep me engaged, like, past a certain tired point.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

I need action, some fun.

[Ed Larson]

You know, one of my movies had tits, which One, Sleepaway Camp two.

[Henry Zabowski]

Which lots of tits have you. And did you watch Sleepaway Camp 2?

[Ed Larson]

I did. I watched Sleep Boy Camp 2 last night. I made Julie watch it. That was one of the movies I loved as a child. Scared the out of me as a child. Really bad.

[Henry Zabowski]

Hey, it's a slasher film.

[Ed Larson]

It's really bad. It's not even a slasher film. Yeah, she's like, you don't even really see the killings that often. It's. They, like, replay everything. It's spoilers, by the way, for this stuff, I guess, that movies from 1980s. Pamela Springsteen, Bruce Springsteen, Sister. No. 1 I kept thinking about.

[Henry Zabowski]

What do you mean?

[Ed Larson]

Sleepaway Camp 2 and Sleep Boy Camp 3 is starring Pamela Springsteen's Bruce Springsteen's sister, who later became a photographer and, like, shot a bunch of, like, Bruce's album covers, like, Human Touch. She took the photograph.

[Henry Zabowski]

No way. She was in Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Yes.

[Ed Larson]

She almost married Sean Penn after making that movie.

[Henry Zabowski]

Oh, he really must have.

[Ed Larson]

And. But the thing was, I'm watching Sleepaway Camp 2, and the whole time I'm just thinking, you know, she got Bruce to the premiere. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm just picturing, like, squirming at the premiere, watching this. Like, I got to get out of here.

[Henry Zabowski]

I watch my naked sister. I got to get the out of here. How do I allow myself to do this? I'm the king of New Jersey. I shouldn't be here.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, yeah. She's Pamela Springsteen.

[Henry Zabowski]

My opening salvo. My opening movie of 31 for 31 was Halloween 3.

[Ed Larson]

I watched that.

[Henry Zabowski]

That. Which again, the reason why I watched it is that it specifically is not. It does not involve Mike Myers.

[Ed Larson]

No, it doesn't.

[Henry Zabowski]

Any.

[Ed Larson]

And I'm kind of disappointed in us because he's my favorite of the guys.

[Henry Zabowski]

But we have other things in there.

[Ed Larson]

Like, that's like.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's why it all goes around. Like, last year, I had a Halloween heavy year. This one was good to see. Halloween 3, it's again, it's not fantastic, but the stuff within it is great. And. Oh, my God, what's his name? The lead guy from Halloween 3.

[Ed Larson]

It's like Atkins or whatever.

[Henry Zabowski]

He's like, is it Don Atkins? Tim Atkins? Tom Atkins. Tom Atkins gets so much pussy in every movie he's in.

[Ed Larson]

There's some side boot in there.

[Henry Zabowski]

There's something about Tom Atkins that they put him in films. There was like, men just used to be handsome to women in a different way.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

Tom Atkins. For some reason, every Woman in Halloween three loved him, desperately wants to have sex with him. And it's the. And I feel like that's common for all of his films. And I don't know if it's just like mustaches used to do a lot.

[Ed Larson]

More work for 70s, 80s, you know, you wanted to look like an old man to get laid.

[Henry Zabowski]

There was something about it.

[Ed Larson]

Girls also, I think if we really want to break down what it is about it is it's poor casting and that poor girl who had to kiss this old man.

[Henry Zabowski]

No, Eddie.

[Ed Larson]

No, Eddie.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's all reality. Tom Atkins is absolutely lothario. There's no way he smells like old cigarettes.

[Ed Larson]

Also, that movie pretty anti Irish. It's pretty anti. They're like.

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, because you know why the salmon is. Has the traditional Kill the children. Yes. Well, the traditional roots for what we know as Halloween does come from Ireland. And it comes from this whole like druid excite. And it also. And it's kind of distinctly more American. Like we've taken Halloween. Oh, it's ours a way farther extent than they do in Europe. And then when they do in other countries.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, because they don't have candy in Ireland.

[Henry Zabowski]

They don't allow it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, no, they don't allow.

[Henry Zabowski]

Because they consider it Catholic.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I will say so. I watched Body Bags. Oh, God. If you're gonna watch Body Bags rent it. Don't watch it on Peacock. The sound was off.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah, Peacock's got bad.

[Ed Larson]

It happened. Something happened like. And I feel like no one. I feel like I'm the only person who has pressed play on Body Bags.

[Henry Zabowski]

Maybe.

[Ed Larson]

And. But the sink is off. No one has reported it.

[Henry Zabowski]

Truly. Dude, we are spoiled by Criterion App. Yes, we're spoiled.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, I'm so mad that we made this list before we found out what horror movies are going to be on Criterion. There's so many good horror movies. I have to not press play.

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, they're too artistic criteria. I want. I know those are the really, really good ones. But this is Halloween which celebrates the other side of it. You put Blood Diner on the list?

[Ed Larson]

Yes. I can't wait. I have that on dvd, though.

[Henry Zabowski]

I just watched it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And it's interesting.

[Ed Larson]

Is it not good?

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, it's very fun, funny. It's very, very funny. The best part about Blood Diner is it directed by a woman. Oh, and she has. I believe her name is Jen. What's her name?

[Ed Larson]

Right there.

[Henry Zabowski]

You got her right there, Rob. Jackie Kong. Yeah, Jackie Kong. She did this like. Yeah, she's a. It's An Asian woman that made an extremely offensive, ridiculous film.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's a really amazing. Apparently, yeah, she knew Marlon Brando growing up. Like, she was like all this kind of stuff. Very interesting. Made a bunch of, like, weird slapstick movies. She made Blood Diner. She. What was the other one? Yeah, Night Patrol was a weird one. And the being is also. Is not bad. The being is not bad.

[Ed Larson]

All right, well, I'm very excited because someone ripped me a copy of blood Diner like, 15 years ago, and I've still. I've held on to it and never watched it. It's not a good film the year, but it's fun. Yes, but that. I haven't seen that yet. So here's the one. I have seen Sinister. I give it a B. Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Honestly, I re watched Sinister with new eyes and I actually liked it a lot better this time than when I saw it in the theater.

[Ed Larson]

I feel like they didn't close it out well.

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, all mov hard time closing it. And that was also the first half.

[Ed Larson]

Scared the out of me, to be honest with you.

[Henry Zabowski]

And also that character, the Sinister character guy does feel like sort of a dry run for what they ended up doing with.

[Ed Larson]

I kept doing it to like, be careful.

[Henry Zabowski]

Here comes B. Don't bend over. Inspired by the Ring, kind of.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, I could see that. Sure.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. Cargo talked to me. Yeah, that was. Was it. He's a guy. He writes C. Robert Cargill was a guy that did a lot of comic books and stuff. It's also a funny. He was funny on Twitter back in the day.

[Ed Larson]

But I will say, of the seven movies I watched, the only one I actually really liked was Night of The Living Dead, 1990. Tom Savini's.

[Henry Zabowski]

I love that one.

[Ed Larson]

I actually really. I didn't think I was gonna like it. And then it was pretty. It was almost shot for shot remake. Up top. And then. And then it, like, really. I like the way it ends. I thought it had a great ending. I'm not gonna spoil that. And then. But I will say Tony Todd. Yeah, it was good to see him in a normal role.

[Henry Zabowski]

God, he's good.

[Ed Larson]

He's great.

[Henry Zabowski]

Tony Todd was a very, very good actor as well.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I liked him a lot. And then the chick had a great story arc, a character. Her character arc was actually very good.

[Henry Zabowski]

I haven't seen it yet. I can't wait to see it.

[Ed Larson]

I was surprised how much I really enjoyed this movie.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's been a while since I've seen it since, like, literally since childhood. So that's why I put that on the list was because I'd never seen this. And this was Tom Savini's directorial debut.

[Ed Larson]

That guy was h. The. The Gandhi looking zombie. Zombie who came in. He's, like, dancing in the doorway. So funny. Yeah. Barely needed any makeup, but this guy.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's why it's nice. We're firmly along in our ride. I hope you guys are playing along as well. It's a fun thing to do throughout the month. And just constantly reminding us of the fact that horror movies are perfect.

[Ed Larson]

Like I said, even the ones I said I did not like six out of seven of these films. And I will say I'm. I'm glad I watched all of them. But as I get older. As I get older at 44, I watch the Gate and I'm like, you know what? Last time.

[Henry Zabowski]

Get it.

[Ed Larson]

This is it. Wow. I'm like, last time, I'm like, I only got, like, half. If half of my life is over.

[Henry Zabowski]

That'S the last time I'll be spending two hours on that.

[Ed Larson]

I'm giving the. It's all the time. I'm giving the case.

[Henry Zabowski]

I understand you're ready for the Gate two now.

[Ed Larson]

No, no, no, no. Done. The Gates. Done. Strangers. Done. Sinister. Done. Body bags. Done. Halloween 3. Maybe sleep boy camp 2. Done. Night living Dead Might watch again.

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, also the ones.

[Ed Larson]

That's a real review.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's what I'm doing. I'm mixing between the two. Where I did. Videodrome is the classic.

[Ed Larson]

Right. Watch that. I'm waiting for it to show up.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's great. It's really fun. The only problem, again, with Videodrome is what James woods has done to his own self after the fact.

[Ed Larson]

Well, he's horrible.

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, it's another example of a character. He's horrible in the movie, too. But it's another example of an actor that was in movies at a time that this is. Again, we're seeing the issue. The issue is that what even when I was joking about. About Tom Atkins really being sexually a dynamo.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

I think a lot of these guys were in a lot of movies where it was written that all of these women would be wildly in love with them.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

And they do begin to believe that that is true.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. And now that they're 80 and alone, it stops.

[Henry Zabowski]

And I think that James woods, like, forgot at some point that he's James Woods.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

The actor. And that in the script, they have to kiss him. Yeah. You know, but Debbie Harry's great in that, too. She's very mysterious. Really. Really good.

[Ed Larson]

I haven't seen that in, like 10 years.

[Henry Zabowski]

I'm very excited for God. That video drone was all done by Rick Baker.

[Ed Larson]

Oh.

[Henry Zabowski]

Which gives it this other edge. It's like that. The feel of the movie is fantastic. Cool.

[Ed Larson]

I didn't realize that. I love that. That makes me very excited for it. And I can't wait. A lot of our movies aren't available anywhere. And I, of course, I ditched Hulu and Paramount plus out of protests. And so I know what I'm gonna do. I found that local video store.

[Henry Zabowski]

I love it.

[Ed Larson]

It's called Be Kind, Rewind or whatever. And I'm going to go there and I'm going to get all the movies from them.

[Henry Zabowski]

I absolutely love it. Keep it local.

[Ed Larson]

You keep it local. Because why am I going to give Apple five bucks when I can give this fucking dude with a pile of DVDs five bucks?

[Henry Zabowski]

Absolutely. Give anything to anything that keeps that man away from becoming a radicalized person at the foot of the fucking Capitol building.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. Yeah, yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

You know, I mean, like anything that keeps them out.

[Ed Larson]

So let's get to that.

[Henry Zabowski]

We did a little 31 for 31 rundown. Do we want to get to updates?

[Ed Larson]

It's updated, man.

[Henry Zabowski]

All right, we hear you do this. Aaron Hernandez update.

[Ed Larson]

There was a fun one I saw in the listener emails. It says, I reprimanded Aaron Hernandez. So In June of 2013, I was hired at an escape room type business in Foxborough, Massachusetts, at Patriots Place, the outdoor mall attached to Gillette Stadium. Oh, God, yeah. How lame do you have to be to put a mall like a normal mall?

[Henry Zabowski]

No, no, it doesn't have a. It's a normal mall. It's not just a shop.

[Ed Larson]

There's a. Why is there an escape room at a football stadium?

[Henry Zabowski]

I think it's because, to be honest, it's something for the wives to do, to be hidden away from their violent husbands.

[Ed Larson]

I mean, Dolphin Stadium is a nightclub. So what am I complaining about? While working, there were two places you could be. One, taking a group of people through the attraction, or two, standing at the main desk selling tickets and merch. About a week or two into my training, I came out of a tour tour I just completed, and I could hear the next tour proceeding very loudly through the show. I asked my manager what was going on, to which he responded, just some Patriots players that came in to take the tour. By the way, the system was down when they came in, so you'll need to charge them their tickets before they leave. Okay, now I should mention I'm 5 foot 6, blonde girl who at the time was going to college to get a degree in theater studies acting. All right, so we got a little actor working here. You know, she's working and trying her best in Boston, you know, Good for her. Yes. I truly had no idea who these men were. Of course not. Why would you? So when they enter their tour, walk straight past me out of the door without paying or acknowledging my presence, I was a little annoyed. About five minutes later, one of them came back and asked for the I you not container of protein powder they had left on the desk during their show. Our business was directly across from a GNC store. Why is there a mall right there?

[Henry Zabowski]

You got to get your money. Why do they have a Mormon? Why do they have a mall across the street from the giant Mormon temple.

[Ed Larson]

The center of slc?

[Henry Zabowski]

It's because they get to make that money.

[Ed Larson]

They love that. So I look straight at the biggest man I've ever seen, and I advise him that, yes, he could have his protein powder back, but he needed to pay for the tickets first. He stared at me blankly for a while and said, okay, let me just go get Mayo's credit card, and then left again. I learned later that he was referring to Gerard Mayo, not the Continent Mayo. He was pretty good. He came back. I swiped the card, gave him his protein powder, and moved on with my life. Near the end of the month, I was selling tickets when I got a call from the office on the second floor, but with a large window that looks over the main desk. I looked up to see my manager, who'd witnessed my interaction with the Patriots player, and a few other co workers looked at me, confused. I asked them what was up. Manager, do you remember that Patriots player you reprimanded for not paying me? Yes. Well, he was just arrested on suspected murder charges. As I'm told. As I'm told. My face went white. I slowly put the phone down and went about my day. I told my parents the story. For a while. My father joked that Hernandez was going to get out of prison and I would be his next victim.

[Henry Zabowski]

Jesus Christ.

[Ed Larson]

We all know that's not a possibility anymore. Now I'm 31 and getting married in a few weeks. I recently retold the story to a group of my friends and found out that one of my bridesmaids is the daughter of the detective who arrested Aaron Hernandez. Massachusetts is so dang small.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's. Honestly, this is all. I just love the idea of. We get so many emails of people Rubbing up against murderers and dealing with murderers.

[Ed Larson]

So many people entered Aaron Hernandez love because he was a famous person.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

So he was around lots of people all the time.

[Henry Zabowski]

And it sounds like across the board, he was a piece of shit.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

I have not heard one nice story. No, I've heard stories. People talking about playing against him in high school now. I've heard stories. People. We've got so many messages of people.

[Ed Larson]

Anyone's, like, no one's come to his defense.

[Henry Zabowski]

Not a single person said, I had a good, good interaction with Aaron Hernandez.

[Ed Larson]

You hear that, Shayana?

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, you know, honestly, then I got message. I got message about her.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

I got a message about his wife and his baby mama.

[Ed Larson]

We don't need. We don't need to get into that.

[Henry Zabowski]

But I'm just saying we got. I got messages about the whole. They're not the funnest group. Maybe it's because they're dealing with their struggles.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, my God. I had this. I just reminds me of a story. When I worked at the Village Poor house, We'd always have football players come in all the time. It was a sports bar in the East Village. The Giants used to come through all the time. We. It was one of those business. And I was manager. And whenever you get, like, a football player and, you know, you want to give them one of the good waitresses, you want to make sure they're taken care of. You know, there's celebrity.

[Henry Zabowski]

And that's also what you can hear right there, is that every restaurant knows they have good staff and bad staff.

[Ed Larson]

Absolutely.

[Henry Zabowski]

You know what I mean? Then you've got the bad staff. You can't figure out how to get rid of.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And you got in there and their liabilities, and they got to be there.

[Ed Larson]

You just. You're hoping for them to not show up one day so you can let them go without paying them.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

But anyway, so. So I remember Ray Lewis and Ray Rice were coming in for dinner. Now, if you remember, Ray Rice is the guy who famously hit his girlfriend in the elevator in Atlantic City. And everyone watched that footage. And then Ray Lewis was always accused of murdering that man on New Year's Eve when he was wearing a white suit. Then the white suit went missing. You know, it's like a whole thing.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

What do you order? Chicken wings or.

[Ed Larson]

They order lots of food. But anyway, so they're coming in, and I'm, you know, I'm telling. I give my best waitress, you know, the table, because I know it's going to be a Good tip. And I want to make sure they're taken care of. And I remember her going, she was the cutest, nicest. I remember her name was Caris and she was just like really polite and calm and just like good at her job. I think she's like a scientist now, you know. And so she, she remembered, she's like, I was like, so you got a very special table, some football players tonight. She's like, oh, I, I hope they're not scary. And I was like, actually, they're the.

[Henry Zabowski]

Scariest of all the two scariest football.

[Ed Larson]

Players I can think of. Don't worry, you'll be fine.

[Henry Zabowski]

You're in a public place. This just be real. And what were they like? Were they fine?

[Ed Larson]

They were great. They tipped well. You know, they, you know, they tipped good. They took care of her and we fed them and all that. You know what? Yeah, it's funny, you know, it's just a fun story. Anyway, regardless, let's continue the show actually on that.

[Henry Zabowski]

But that was very frightening from your grave.

[Ed Larson]

Saving money, saving money now. Saving money, saving money now. You know what?

[Henry Zabowski]

What?

[Ed Larson]

I'm saving money. And you know why I'm saving money? Because it's October and I like doing spooky stuff. I like going out to theme park for their haunted Halloween nights. You know, I enjoy that. But I'll tell you one thing about those very expensive, very expensive. You can't just go on a whim. You got to make sure you're prepared. And a good way to save some money this October is to get rocket money. And rocket money is going to help you cancel all those unwanted subscriptions and save that money. Don't let these people get away with stealing your money for subscriptions you forgot about and or you paid for twice you didn't realize it. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com LPOTL today that's RocketMoney.com LPOTL RocketMoney.com LPOTL as a small business owner, you know that change is the name of the game. Operational costs, labor markets, tariffs. Wouldn't it be nice if something stayed the same? How about your business Internet rate? Get reliable, secure 5G business Internet from T Mobile for business for $40 a month with a 5 year price guarantee when paired with a voice line. That's stability you need from the partner you can depend on. On switch now@t mobile.com BI/ taxes and fees guarantee exclusions like taxes and fees applies.

[Henry Zabowski]

The exclusions and details@t mobile.com the thought of getting a degree can be straight up terrifying. We get it. But Southern New Hampshire University makes it easier than you'd think. They have over 200 degrees you can earn online. No set class times so your social life stays alive and well. And low online tuition that won't scare your bank account. College doesn't have to be a horror story. Visit snhu.edu/lastpodcast to get started. That's snhu.edu/lastpodcast thing that is also happening, that's also out in the news is that the Munich airport got shut down by drones this week. Another airport or last two days in a row. In the evening of October 3, German air traffic control restricted flight operations at Munich Airport as a precautionary measure due to unconfirmed drone sightings and suspended them until further notice. They had. This happened now twice. It happened on Thursday and Friday.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And so they.

[Ed Larson]

Denmark and Norway has also seen this happen.

[Henry Zabowski]

What we covered last week in Denmark at the Copenhagen airport. And this is happening again. We. Again everybody's screaming, it's Russia.

[Ed Larson]

It's Russia.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's Russia. It makes sense that it's Russia. Unfortunately, they are saying we do track Russian drones and we don't think that these are them. So that's. Or there's something other, some version of Russian drones, but. Or something like these drones. I think you need to look at them, though, because it's actually quite frightening. It's a line of drones that. Sweeping around the airport. And again, they're not. There's no reports saying what the hell they are. The German authorities, just like the Copenhagen authorities came out and said, you know, they're just saying, we have no fucking clue. They don't know how to do a gigantic cross propaganda machine front like we do. Yeah, all right. Like, they're not as good at it as we are. And we. They. They just. They. So they don't know how to lie at the local level. They're legitimately. Like, we're scared and we don't know what it is. No one's telling us what it is. And it's very largely. It does seem to be. I'm not even saying this is UFOs.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, well, it seems there's also lots of Russian drones that entered NATO airspace over Poland and Romania.

[Henry Zabowski]

So they know.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, but that they knew. They don't know what these are.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes, they know what those things are and know what these things are. But these definitely look like fucking. They look like human Drones, they do look like human drones. They just look like they're way bigger and no one's claiming them.

[Ed Larson]

Also at this point, conspiracy time. I think if I was an alien and they saw that we had all these drones, why not try to make shit that looks like our shit?

[Henry Zabowski]

We've been talking about this. The idea that they are legitimately just copying us. I don't know. I also just think now we're in full bad actor zone. Like now we're just in full on the mystery zone in between where nobody knows what the information is. And we're. We're specifically being gamed against ourselves. Like, we're supposed to be getting used to these mystery drones. I don't know why. I don't know what these. These drones are accessing. Yeah, it's over there now. We had ours. We seem to not have ours anymore. Don't know what's happening.

[Ed Larson]

I mean, they still show up. There's everywhere. You can't. Now that everyone can have a drone. I saw one of my backyard the other night.

[Henry Zabowski]

It. But we're talking about the key difference. This is much like the way everybody does the Trump just jokes. It's just jokes, blah, blah, blah. Where you try to minimize it. It's like this whole like weird minimizing game going on where it's like. Yeah, I get it. Like, I do understand that. It's like it stopped and they are drones or they're machines. But there. That's two separate. That's a. Two different sports. Yeah. But you. The drone you can get is not this shit. This shit's like definitely the highest of end military grade, proprietary level. Like drone. Like giant drones.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

So this isn't just normal ass. People.

[Ed Larson]

People. Yeah. Remember the. I also got that crazy footage that we can't show because it's. But I got it from Danny. Danny Falupo.

[Henry Zabowski]

I literally, like. We got one of those. I love our life sometimes. We got one of those. The. That Eddie and I saw, like, and you can't see, honestly, is wild. And we saw some really wild.

[Ed Larson]

He would have let me see who it was from. Yes. And then like, because he got it from his friend, he wouldn't let me see who that person was. And then he showed me the video. And then he. Then he let me show that video to Henry.

[Henry Zabowski]

It was very wild. And it was like, you. We don't.

[Ed Larson]

It was off a fighter jet. It was just like. It was just like a dot going up and down in and out of the water.

[Henry Zabowski]

We don't know what this stuff is, we don't know. And then you have. What's his name? Was it Tim Mueller? Tim was the other guy that Tim Burnett was that the senator, the one that's just straight up came out and said oh, we're not only talking to UFOs but like they live off of California and I go visit them. And like he was like talking about all this about how like, I mean.

[Ed Larson]

We absolutely know off of San Diego all the time. Time.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes. But like there's like. I think it was Timber Chet who came out and said straight up there are aliens in the water.

[Ed Larson]

I mean it makes place. It makes sense that the only place it would be.

[Henry Zabowski]

But this is also. These are Republican obviously and Timber Chet also. He's getting the only thing. The only weirdly which is fucking ridiculous.

[Ed Larson]

Is he horrible?

[Henry Zabowski]

No. Who knows? I mean. Yes, but there are. He's the only person taking UFOs seriously and he's talking about it as if is well known information and it's just over with.

[Ed Larson]

You know what's weird about the thing with San Diego though is you know, you would expect if you see UFOs going in and out of the water, you would expect to be incredibly deep. But the. The water is notoriously shallow.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Outside of the coast of San Diego. So it makes me think that that's not right.

[Henry Zabowski]

And they ultimately straight up said the main reason why they're no one's moving on anything is because the. It's what the generals keep telling people like Tim Burchett is that. That they could have blown us up 20 times over. That's how I feel about anytime they wanted and they haven't yet. So obviously they're either waiting, they're just hanging out, couldn't give a about us. It's very possible that they just. They writing us off. What if they're trying to find a way to leave themselves?

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

You know what I mean? What if it's like even that they.

[Ed Larson]

Just don't have enough space gas.

[Henry Zabowski]

They're just like literally like guys, shut the up. I don't even want to hear you anything.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Like I just like we're trying, trying to leave.

[Ed Larson]

We want to go.

[Henry Zabowski]

They tell. Are you. This is what Timber Chet said. They tell me something's moving at hundreds of miles an hour underwater, as large as a football field underwater. This Tennessee congressman told Republican Congressman Matt Gaetz.

[Ed Larson]

Great. Oh good. I'm glad he's on the case.

[Henry Zabowski]

They're all. Don't worry. This is the problem is. The problem is all the guys I got to talk to like that.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Everybody's a fucking child molester. Fucking crazy person. The Democrats got nobody to talk to. We just got Chuck Schumer counting his corns and then we got them. They're all doing nothing. They all just love the fact that the government's off of work. They're all just sitting at home doing jack dick loving life, making fucking stock trades, and we're all just sitting here. They kick the football so they don't have to vote on the Epstein thing. And you got this fucking idiot getting trotted out in front of all the cameras being, oh, there's a football field.

[Ed Larson]

Sized UFO in the water.

[Henry Zabowski]

And it's like, bro, it's not even moving the fucking needle, dude.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, it's. No one gives a. Yeah, some of those drones at the beginning of the year were shooting other drones down. Yep. Like, we just, like, stop talking about it.

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, because again, what. What that shows me somebody got the answer and no one wants. No, we're not allowed to know what the answer is.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Because that's what each other like, what the fuck?

[Henry Zabowski]

They do it specifically. Like the thing over Yemen. They do it specifically, specifically so that they. This is. This is the. Their version of a cover up is to just shut up about it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Because they're like, again, it's not going anywhere. No one's doing anything. The government's not working right now. We can all. Nobody gives a fuck.

[Ed Larson]

You know, that's what they found out in the Amelia Earhart files.

[Henry Zabowski]

Drones. Yeah, it was drones. Honestly, I was like, obviously, as you guys have heard me talk about on the show, I was really kind of like, so puzzled that even, like, because the Trump administration, one thing is they're so transparent and they're so. They do what they say they're going to do.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And, you know, and when he said that stuff about the Epstein files, I was like, first of all, I was so confused by Trump not releasing all that information. I was confused and hurt in a way. But then all that went away when I saw the Amelia Earhart.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. You're like, oh, he does believe in truth.

[Henry Zabowski]

He cares in there. Because everybody knows that pussies float.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And that's what the main thing I learned from the Amelia Earhart thing is that float. And it's crazy. The only thing they found was her bush. They found her bush. This is true. I don't know if that's. Read that file. They found her bush. A bunch of Japanese people were using it on an island As a way. As a fire starter. They were using the top of her bush as a fire starter because she, weirdly enough, she grew steel wool.

[Ed Larson]

Well, she was so in tune with the sky.

[Henry Zabowski]

She was part airplane.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

You ever seen that movie Titane?

[Ed Larson]

Titane? No, Titan.

[Henry Zabowski]

No. It's called T I T A N E. With like a French girl becoming like a horny car. No, that's Amelia. He wants a car. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

She became. She became an airplane. She just slowly became an airplane.

[Henry Zabowski]

To be honest, what I found out was a. To be on. Some of the most damning thing were all the allegations from other planes. Planes on Amelia Earhart. That actually really showed me they name names.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Orville Wright was there watching Amelia Earhart making a twin Cessna Eater out at gunpoint.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And to be honest, actually called him horrible. Right. They did at the time. So honestly, I'm really glad that no one with that. The truth that came out of that document was so blistering that of course no one's talking about it because again, no one. She would never been present accident.

[Ed Larson]

It's certainly not helping the fact that, you know, people say women can't drive.

[Henry Zabowski]

They shouldn't fly. They should have. Certainly not. That's what this showed me. Because that's where she said apparently the one women.

[Ed Larson]

I'm sorry.

[Henry Zabowski]

One of the big things. He does it. He really doesn't. One of the worst things apparently, was when she was flying was that she was so distracted by the amount of menstrual blood pouring out of her.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

That she couldn't look at the dials anymore.

[Ed Larson]

That's why she was eaten by sharks. She would have been fine. When she fell, they.

[Henry Zabowski]

When she said, when Amelia got into the plane, they called it the vag pit and it just filled with blood and it covered all the dials. So that was actually really difficult. So again, can't trust women. And Amelia Earhart should never have flown. And that's what I learned. And honestly. And I feel so much better. I'm released from all the bad news.

[Ed Larson]

Also, in Munich, there was a. There was a. A bomb threat called an October fest. So they. They're like, oh, it kind of lines up with the other one.

[Henry Zabowski]

It does. It's very strange.

[Ed Larson]

Just want to bring the story back around.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes. Than. We have another. We have another horrific story here. We do need to get into this story because the debate is. The debate at the center of the story is really important.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. Yeah. This one's wild. Go for it.

[Henry Zabowski]

So follow us on this because again.

[Ed Larson]

I go either way.

[Henry Zabowski]

This is a thought experiment for all of us and we're all going to talk about this in a Even keeled sensible. That's what we're searching.

[Ed Larson]

We do take a lot for sticking up for the bad guy. Occasionally.

[Henry Zabowski]

We do.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

And this is a case where we're all confused.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

So this Mineola, Texas. Great place. Texas. Man is accused of holding another man at gunpoint for hitting his dog with a car which killed the animal.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zabowski]

ALBERTO Joshua Hernandez, 22, emotional. Yes. Young.

[Ed Larson]

Young.

[Henry Zabowski]

He is accused of forcing a man to dig a grave for the dog and withdraw money from an ATM to compensate Hernandez for his loss. All of this was done at gunpoint?

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

So this is what happens. This man, the victim. They're calling him the victim, which is true. The man that hit the. Hit the dog.

[Ed Larson]

Okay. Yes. So September 8th, lots of people hit dogs with cars.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes. So a dog ran out into the street from a residential home.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

Man hit it with his car. He pulled over and another man came driving up out of the property in a Ford pickup, stopped behind him. Yeah, Hernandez, the young man with the gun, he got out of the pickup.

[Ed Larson]

And he pointed the gun at the.

[Henry Zabowski]

Victim, saying, I'm going to shoot you in the head. The victim said he pleaded for his life. Right. He put the gun to his head saying, you killed my dog. It's an AR15.

[Ed Larson]

Well, no, no, no. This is. I think this is a f. There's two guns.

[Henry Zabowski]

There's two guns.

[Ed Larson]

There'S two guns. Yeah, there's two guns.

[Henry Zabowski]

So he goes.

[Ed Larson]

The first gun, I feel like, is a hand, probably.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. So he made him pledge. He made him plead for his life.

[Ed Larson]

My dog.

[Henry Zabowski]

You killed my. Because I got so far. It was a mistake. It was a mistake.

[Ed Larson]

I mean, honestly. Yes, that's the scene. Yes. Yeah, yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Documents say Hernandez, you know, he forced the man at gunpoint to pick up the dog's body from the ditch, carry it to his yard. The affidavit, then he said he took.

[Ed Larson]

The keys in his phone.

[Henry Zabowski]

Being like, you, you are doing this funeral. Etc. Right the now. You're doing this right the now. They went and he took him to an atm. They got a shovel.

[Ed Larson]

Well, no. Yeah, we got the shovel. He got the shovel. He dug the shot. He dug the hole for the dog. They buried the dog, then they went to the atm.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Then while he's burying the dog in his yard, he goes into his house, switches out the guns, gets the AR15, comes back outside. It's like, all right, now we're going to the atm. Yep.

[Henry Zabowski]

And then they sat, they got the money, got him $200.

[Ed Larson]

That's how much it costs to deal with a dead dog. This.

[Henry Zabowski]

This whole thing. Absolutely. He said Hernandez took his driver's license, took a picture of it, told, told him, I now know where you live, and if this is not enough, I'm gonna come back and get more. And then. Which was kind of crazy, when he came back to drop the guy back off, he left.

[Ed Larson]

He dropped him at home.

[Henry Zabowski]

The guy drove away, obviously called the police. But when he showed up, Hernandez's mother was also a. So she was a part of this scenario as well. Now, obviously, the villain here is.

[Ed Larson]

Is here.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's like this again. If you've seen one battle after another, which is my favorite movie of the.

[Ed Larson]

Year, it's really good.

[Henry Zabowski]

Sean Penn's character is a horrendous villain that has, at a sort of. At his heart, this very relatable. There's a relatable yearning inside of Sean Penn. There's like a relatable desperation.

[Ed Larson]

He wants to love.

[Henry Zabowski]

He want physically can't love. It's like a whole thing. Right. This villain is in that realm of being a Tarantino style. Like, there but for the grace of God go I. That man walks. I get it. If you kill. If someone.

[Ed Larson]

You killed the wrong man's drug. Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

If you hit Carmen with the car, I'd have two reactions. One, obviously, is the screaming. No.

[Ed Larson]

Right.

[Henry Zabowski]

Is the screaming, no. No. Right. Then would I say I'm above warning to get that person who killed my dog, put him in the trunk of a car, take them out in the middle of nowhere.

[Ed Larson]

I understand the urge.

[Henry Zabowski]

Drop them off. I get it. And not kill him. I'm not saying kill like. I'm not saying you should kill.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

I'm saying that I get the idea of dog walking a man. Man that killed my pet, my beloved animal. And I could see the satisfaction that one would gain putting, like, a gun in his mouth.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

Dragging him down the street by his ear with the gun in his mouth, telling him, now, you're gonna be my dog.

[Ed Larson]

We all want to make our dogs.

[Henry Zabowski]

You my dog now. I could see that process.

[Ed Larson]

I'm not a dog. I'm a man.

[Henry Zabowski]

They're not anymore.

[Ed Larson]

To me, you're a dog.

[Henry Zabowski]

Today. You're a dog. You're eating dog food. Because that's what we got for dogs, right?

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's what I will do. Right. But I also. Then I have a saint in me.

[Ed Larson]

I know it's illegal.

[Henry Zabowski]

I know it's. I know. I know I'm the villain. Yeah, I know I'm the villain. He's the villain.

[Ed Larson]

But you're not. But you're the villain because you love too much.

[Henry Zabowski]

The love is so big. Alberto Hernando's had inside of him, his love was so large, he had to kidnap another man to prove his love.

[Ed Larson]

I have to say, at 22, you make bad decisions.

[Henry Zabowski]

22 is you're a monster.

[Ed Larson]

Me at 22, I had just gotten my gun, you know, like, I didn't have a dog, but if someone killed my roommate's dog, I don't know how I would have reacted. Yes. You know, so I'm not saying I. It's good, but I might. That I don't know how I would have reacted. I think that if it happened now as an adult, I'd just be, you know, probably just slap the guy a bunch.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. I mean, it's just really hard because we know it's an accident, but there are accidents that kill our beloveds and make the other people upset, make you crazy. And I'm not as gracious as an Erica Kurt.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

You know, like, to, you know, like, I'm not ready to sell merch about a dead Carmi. I'm not ready to.

[Ed Larson]

Ready to take over Carme's podcast a week after.

[Henry Zabowski]

I'm not ready to take on that ad deal. I'm not ready to take on all that money that Carmi's gonna leave behind.

[Ed Larson]

And Carmi was in that beauty contest that she won for no reason.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's because I knew the guy that was controlling it. And then I had. I also met the man that impregnated Carmi. I chose him as well.

[Ed Larson]

That's cool.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. A Young Republican do.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

But, yeah, he's so. Yes, he's a villain. And we're saying last podcast on the left is not pro Alberto Hernandez.

[Ed Larson]

No, but we. I do sympathize and understand where he's coming from.

[Henry Zabowski]

Side stories. Lpotl gmail.com. i know that. Again, stop. If you're writing the email right now that says, look, crime.

[Ed Larson]

It is a crime.

[Henry Zabowski]

We know.

[Ed Larson]

I know it's a crime. I'm just saying we should contribute to this man's canteen while he's in jail so he has a nicer jail experience because he's dealing with the loss of a dog.

[Henry Zabowski]

Your man's got problems. People, different people grieve in different ways. Dude, that dog. Dogs.

[Ed Larson]

You know, she was a Good dog.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. Of course.

[Ed Larson]

If it was a bad dog or a foster. Like, I'm. Look, I'm thinking of my three dogs right now. And like, I think if someone hit Tootsie, I'd be like, well, it's her time.

[Henry Zabowski]

Tootsie's gotta go.

[Ed Larson]

She's slow through the road. Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And I don't even mean that I want Tootsie to go for her own sake.

[Ed Larson]

Honestly, if she went fast, it'd probably be great.

[Henry Zabowski]

Much better. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

If someone hit.

[Henry Zabowski]

Cuz she's going slow.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. No, she's still alive. 18 next month. If someone hit my new dog. My wonderful. My foster, Jizzy. If someone hit Jizzy, the foster they.

[Henry Zabowski]

Trying to get rid of.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I think we're getting rid of her this weekend. Thank you for everyone who reached out about getting. I didn't know that the maison shore charged $500 for the dog. So I'm sorry that I said she was free. She's not free. It's $500 adoption fee to keep the adoption fee. Adoption process going. I understand now. I didn't when I made the video. Sorry. Because I got Harley for free. I didn't realize because I fostered her first and then they let me keep her for free. So I thought all the dogs were free. I did not know. But that being said, if someone hit Jizzy. Ah, you know, it's foster, not my dog.

[Henry Zabowski]

No mus. No fuss up with an adopted child.

[Ed Larson]

But the. If someone hit Harley, I think I might lose my mind.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

I think I might. Because she's bigger. It would probably take her a while to go. Like. I think that I would like, lose my mind, like, and like fall into like some kind of weird psychosis. Oh, yeah. And I would be like. I do that thing where I'm just like. It's not because I want to report the person who killed my dog.

[Henry Zabowski]

No. It's like I want me around so.

[Ed Larson]

I don't do something bad. Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

I mean, honestly. But I feel that that is what makes you a responsible member of society.

[Ed Larson]

Call the police.

[Henry Zabowski]

Call the cops on me.

[Ed Larson]

Call the cops on me. Me. That's what. What happened.

[Henry Zabowski]

But yeah, I also get.

[Ed Larson]

I understand. Hernandez.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes. Cuz, you know, it's weird cuz in my mind it's like, even with human kids, I don't. That's. I'm gonna get some obviously into trouble for even just saying this, but even human kids, it feels like you could make another one really easily.

[Ed Larson]

It depends on how old you are.

[Henry Zabowski]

But I mean, Hernandez.

[Ed Larson]

22, though, he's. He's got plenty of kids to pop out.

[Henry Zabowski]

I'm just saying, in terms of like, dogs, it's so hard to find that unique dog again.

[Ed Larson]

How long do you get for this? See, here's the thing.

[Henry Zabowski]

If he just kidnapping a man, he's gonna probably get 10, 15 years.

[Ed Larson]

I think the. The. The ATM is where he up.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah, buddy.

[Ed Larson]

I think.

[Henry Zabowski]

I think it was the gunpoint in kidnapping the man and taking several locations.

[Ed Larson]

I think the gun pointing at the man, making him.

[Henry Zabowski]

Burying the dog.

[Ed Larson]

Dog ends there. I feel like you might just serve a month.

[Henry Zabowski]

You might be friends. I feel like.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I feel like there might be something.

[Henry Zabowski]

The guy might get it. The guy might even be like me, man.

[Ed Larson]

I'm sad. But it's the taking to the atm. Hernandez was arrested by police in Minola on Thursday and charged with aggravated robbery, aggravated kidnapping, and drug charges.

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, yeah, he had drugs on him. Absolutely. I feel like this might probably he's just been done in ball.

[Ed Larson]

Saw his dog get killed.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's a bad combination.

[Ed Larson]

Kill my dog, man. Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

My dog.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's what happen.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah, I can see that. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Wow.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yep.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. I mean. I mean, what are you going to do? You two guns. You shouldn't have so many guns. Texas, easy to get guns. You know, it's. It's a sticky situation. I feel bad for Hernandez.

[Henry Zabowski]

I think they're actually. Unfortunately, like in Texas. I do believe that the gun has to go into therapy after shooting.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's not the person. The gun has to go because it's not meant to kill.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. You have to bury the gun.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. Yeah. That's. That's called being bullet kosher.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. So I'm sorry this happened to you, sir. I'm sorry that you hit a dog with your car, which is very emotional.

[Henry Zabowski]

Sorry for the man, too, because that's sad. It's sad to kill a dog.

[Ed Larson]

Sad to kill. You know, that with you on its own. I guess getting the gun point in your face does kind of cut that, you know, depression and that way I'd be thankful.

[Henry Zabowski]

Thankful.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Because they'd rather be scared than sad.

[Ed Larson]

In a weird way, he owes Hernandez.

[Henry Zabowski]

But that's. Again, that's. The payment was for.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. You're giving him a new lease on life.

[Ed Larson]

Leash, please. Cute. If he had a leash, this would have never happened.

[Henry Zabowski]

No, exactly. Maybe there is, like, we could maybe also talk about that, about how offense could be in order. Oh, yeah. There's a lot of stuff here. There's A lot of, there's a lot of hang. There's a lot of hanging chads here. A lot of hanging chats. We'll talk about a little bit here. This one guy, this. You see this teenager who killed his parents, then he, he killed his.

[Ed Larson]

He didn't kill his parents. He killed his mother and her friend and he stabbed them. This took place in Cambria County. Yeah, in Pennsylvania. So this kid, a 14 year old, stabbed his mom and her friend to death and then texted his girlfriend, I just killed my parents. And then followed with jk.

[Henry Zabowski]

But as a matter of fact, he was not jk.

[Ed Larson]

He killed Parrot. So I could see where he. His joke was.

[Henry Zabowski]

It wasn't a good one, he says. But he did that as in like psych. As in like that's a funny joke. Yes, but it's not if the text was funny.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. Now obviously, you know, this just happened. You know, he still still has to go to, you know, he has to go through court and all that. It seems like there probably isn't, but he did. It does seem like he is the one who killed them. He was wandering around the neighborhood screaming, I did it.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes, he did it. But you know what? We're not jking about our brand new dates on JK Ultra. So you can go and check those out on last podcast on the left. We got a bunch of brand new dates and we don't care what we say in a text. It's not funny to sell tickets.

[Ed Larson]

That's right. 2026, we're coming in. So basically today, Patreon members, they can buy tickets Friday on sale, the general public. So get in there, Patreon members. Get in there and get your tickets before, before everyone gets in there and buys up all the good ones. So here's what we're doing. We're doing January 31st, we're going to Philly February 28th.

[Henry Zabowski]

I want to put this out. That Philly show is the biggest show of our entire tour and we are going to be doing something special at that Philly.

[Ed Larson]

I want to blow that out.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

I love Philly. We had such a good time when we did our side story show so much. And then the last time, last podcast in 11 to Philly, wasn't there like a blackout or something and then you guys like were and like so then.

[Henry Zabowski]

We had to do a re up on that.

[Ed Larson]

Billy O is owed a real show and we're gonna come and deliver a big ass show. Please don't fight us.

[Henry Zabowski]

And then February, they fight amongst themselves.

[Ed Larson]

Yes, well, you know, then the outsiders, you know, that come through.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

They fight them very well. Fight them. February 28th, we're going to be in Austin. Very pumped for that. I can't wait. I've never performed in that city before. March 13, Indianapolis. April 25, Cincinnati. Scared to have my family see our show.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yay. Come on, let them try.

[Ed Larson]

I'm very nervous about it. They might have to say, sit at home. May 29th, Pittsburgh. Going to be a lot of fun. June 27th, Grand Rapids, Michigan. Let's do it.

[Henry Zabowski]

Grand Rapids is a really cool little town.

[Ed Larson]

I've never been to Grand Rapids.

[Henry Zabowski]

Grand Rapids, literally some of the best beer I've had in the entire country. I believe that Grand Rapids also, we went to a very funny club where Grand Rapids. Yeah, It's a funny clubs.

[Ed Larson]

Is it just like a club. Is it like you went to a club and you just beat each other with sticks?

[Henry Zabowski]

Club Sexy time.

[Ed Larson]

Sexy.

[Henry Zabowski]

Oh, yeah. Everyone's real rap. Wrapped up.

[Ed Larson]

Grand Rap. We're all wrapped up.

[Henry Zabowski]

Grand Rapids, real close, real cold. I remember we had to wait online outside of an establishment in the Snow. It's like 1:45 in the morning. We waited out there, and we walked into a sports bar. Man, it was lit up, dude. Grand Rapids gets up.

[Ed Larson]

All right, Grand Rapids, we're coming for you at June 27th. And then in July 17th, we're in Tulsa, and July 18th, Oklahoma City. Gonna be a fun. We're doing double time in Oakland, Oklahoma.

[Henry Zabowski]

We're covering it all with. Honestly, it's great. But just so you know, we're not killing any parents on this tour. Unless, of course, it is Ed's wife's parents. If they come and they get so offended by the material that they die, they will.

[Ed Larson]

They will get offended by the. Yeah, they can't come.

[Henry Zabowski]

Do they not understand that these thoughts Support her daughter? Love her daughter.

[Ed Larson]

That is the thing. I think that it might be split. I think if they come and see the crowd and be like, holy shit. Ed's like, really successful, successful now.

[Henry Zabowski]

And they might like it.

[Ed Larson]

You might like it. But then they see what I'm talking about when I scream hail Satan and then 2, 000 people yell Hail Satan back. I'm worried how they might handle.

[Henry Zabowski]

I wish that they could understand that that means Satan's winning and Christ is losing.

[Ed Larson]

You know what? I'm at Bridgetown meets. I want to talk to you. You have to tell Julie's mom, Janet Rosing, when she's there every day, pretty much buying meat from These people from these men. I think you need to tell her it's okay what I say on stage. All right. Bridgetown. Your ham salad. I support everything you do over there. Delicious Mets. I love the geta. You guys are amazing. Go to Bridgetown meets. Tell Julie's mom whatever I say on stage, it's okay.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. Again, it's a character.

[Ed Larson]

It's a character.

[Henry Zabowski]

That's what you say. Say to them. You say, it's a character. I don't mean it.

[Ed Larson]

The strong strapping men at Bridgetown meets. Let Janet Rosing know that Ed Larson can say whatever he wants on stage.

[Henry Zabowski]

Honestly would also would help too, if you say stuff like this. Is Rosing. God, you look good today.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, you look great.

[Henry Zabowski]

God damn. Mr. Rosing. Where's Mr. Rosen?

[Ed Larson]

Here. Here's some free ham salad just for you.

[Henry Zabowski]

I want to see you eat it, though. I found it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, there's hamset. Look, they have to stock up more now because of me.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yep, Only because of him.

[Ed Larson]

I'm selling this ham salad. Go check it out. Bridgetown. Finer meats. Cincinnati, Ohio. One of my favorite Beach Boy songs is take care of your feet. It's very important, you know, because you only got two, and you're not a doctor in the uk. You know, you need to take care of your feet. Best way to do this. Are you ready for this? Bambooz? I love my bombas. I never wanted to get them. I was always like, why? I'm not gonna get them? Socks are too nice. You know, I just buy bad socks. Nah, get good socks. Socks. You make them nice. Oh, you're Henry's wearing bombas right now. Look at you.

[Henry Zabowski]

They're old bombas.

[Ed Larson]

There's old Bombas. They look new. They're beautiful.

[Henry Zabowski]

I wash them every night in vinegar.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, do they have merino wool? You know, I love that.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's Mo Reno. Oh, no.

[Ed Larson]

And Supima cotton. Those are very, very high premium materials. Enjoy your life. Take care of your feet. But the day I started buying better socks was like the day I became a better man. And I know that for a fact. All right, so head over to bombas.com lpotl and use code lpotl for 20% off your first purchase. That's B O LP code lpotl checkout. Take care of them feet.

[Henry Zabowski]

But the only ones you get. This is an ad by BetterHelp. World mental health day is in October, which you'd know if you ask me about candy corn, because then sometimes I kind of irrationally pop off it's actually really nice at world Mental health days in the middle of October, so that when I'm screaming and yelling, a lot of people are just thinking I'm, I'm watching horror movies, right? They don't even know that I'm like, having problems, right? But that's where BetterHelp comes in. It's shining the spotlight on therapists, people who truly make the world a better place. Because the right therapists can change everything. BetterHelp therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully qualified. BetterHelp does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals, like conquering your enemies. One of my favorite things to do in therapy is to run new bits and then get yelled at for my emotional distancing. It's BetterHelp. This World Mental Health Day. We're celebrating the therapists who've helped millions of people take a step forward. If you're ready to find the right therapist for you, BetterHelp can help you start that journey. Our listeners get 10 off their first [e-mail] LastPod that's better.

[Ed Larson]

Help.

[Henry Zabowski]

H E L D P.com Last Last Pod can a home security system really call itself security if it only responds when someone is already inside? I don't know. Simply safe is different. It's designed to help stop crime before it starts. At the maternity ward where the criminals are born, AI powered cameras detect threats while they are still outside your home and alert real security agents. All right? They confront the intruder saying, hey, Buster Brown. Those they all be like, hey, Buster Brown, you leave that grass alone. Hey, Mr. Man, that's where the dog. Right. That's what those guys are gonna say. And I'll say, Simplisafe has really done wonderful things for us here at lpn. They've kept all of our words here safe. Far safer than the current administration keeps our words. So they're really thinking about us. Okay? So go get Simplisafe. Protect yourself from everybody else. Right now, my listeners can save 50% on a SimpliSafe home security system at simplisafe.com lpo2 that's simply safe.com lpotl there's no safe like simply safe. So we want to do this. This other story is really stupid about the hunter who shot the kid thinking they use a squirrel. And then. But the problem is with the kid thinking he's a squirrel.

[Ed Larson]

He's way bigger than a squirrel.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

He's not even that hairy.

[Henry Zabowski]

No. And it sounds like an excuse it sounds like I just want to shoot that kid in the head.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, well, the kid's dead.

[Henry Zabowski]

Exactly.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. So be careful. Also with. An Australian dock work worker was fired for putting his penis in his co worker's Subway sandwich. But now he's allowed to work there again. What? Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

How did he get to go back?

[Ed Larson]

They were like, yeah, it's fine. Just.

[Henry Zabowski]

I mean, Australians famously have a wonderful sense of humor.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

So I wonder if it's partially that, but how do they tell that it was. His penis was in the sandwich?

[Ed Larson]

It said his employer accused Smith of showing his male co workers a bikini clad photos of female colleagues, also telling one that he had seen bat.

[Henry Zabowski]

We say that again. Say that again.

[Ed Larson]

Wait, what was this? He was in trouble for showing his male co workers bikini clad photos of female colleagues. But also.

[Henry Zabowski]

But wait a second, where they were just on social media.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I think he was just like looking up Instagram pictures, being a creep. He's being a creep. Well, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Definitely. Yeah, of course.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

But then he put his in someone's Subway sandwich. And. And he called the. He called the colleague a useless, useless piece of. And a condescending cunt.

[Henry Zabowski]

No, my question is, is that they then go. They then were like, die or.

[Ed Larson]

All right, yeah, they fired him.

[Henry Zabowski]

I was 40 years old, when you think about it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. I think a week went by and like, ah, we miss him. And so they said the termination was harsh, unjust and unreasonable.

[Henry Zabowski]

But did he put his penis in a sandwich?

[Ed Larson]

He did put his penis in a sandwich.

[Henry Zabowski]

But what's the proof of that? Was there video?

[Ed Larson]

He said it.

[Henry Zabowski]

What do you mean he said it?

[Ed Larson]

He told people I put my in the sandwich.

[Henry Zabowski]

Australia, Australians.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Never say I'll. There's no way to prove it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

So there's no way to prove it, guys. Unless you got mustard on your balls.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. But the thing is, I think the reason they hired him back is because it was just a Subway sandwich. And it's just. It could only have made it better than worse, you know?

[Henry Zabowski]

You think that he was like, he's the office personality hire.

[Ed Larson]

Yes, yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's actually interesting because he didn't get caught doing it. Someone just said it's hearsay. Like, someone's like, he said that he did hearsay. Well, let's smell his dick.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. If it smells like tuna fish.

[Henry Zabowski]

Ho. Someone's got provolone dick. It's like. It's like getting fired because someone said that you did something. But there's no Proof of it.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. But you said you did it.

[Henry Zabowski]

Right. But he's like. He could be like.

[Ed Larson]

I was talking.

[Henry Zabowski]

You know, I was.

[Ed Larson]

It was. It's not true. Yeah, I know. But I will say it's probably easy to be a dock worker there.

[Henry Zabowski]

I mean, I guess it's real easy going. But it's like. But the. The Australians are famous for being fun, fun loving party people and. But the thing is, Australians is. I guess it really is. The other guys must have finally just been like, who hasn't?

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

You know what I mean? The rest of them must have just been so, like.

[Ed Larson]

What do they call Burger King over there?

[Henry Zabowski]

It's Hungry Jacks. Hungry Jacks.

[Ed Larson]

Hungry Jacks.

[Henry Zabowski]

Because of one man.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I do.

[Henry Zabowski]

One man stood in the way of Burger King's rights to the.

[Ed Larson]

On the Burger King.

[Henry Zabowski]

He said it was amazing. It was really, really great.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. So. Yeah. So if you are going to work at the docks, know that you can get some. Oh, God. It's just.

[Henry Zabowski]

I do feel like they really should.

[Ed Larson]

They should kept him fired.

[Henry Zabowski]

They. I really feel like it's a bad precedent to set.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

But I also understand if it's hearsay because if DOC workers aren't looking at the evidence, who is?

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And you know, because, you know, they had a tribunal. They had to set it up with a judge that they had to make him a fake wig out of spaghetti. And then they had a fake.

[Ed Larson]

Lloyd.

[Henry Zabowski]

They had a whole. Like, it was on the dock. Like they did like an unofficial trial. Like they do it in the stuff sitcom.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, my God. He apol. The way he apologized for showing the pictures of the female co workers was. He said that he shouldn't be using his phone while at work.

[Henry Zabowski]

What an.

[Ed Larson]

Of course. What a piece of doing.

[Henry Zabowski]

No, no, no.

[Ed Larson]

Lessons learned.

[Henry Zabowski]

Not a single one. Oh, wow. Hey, so enjoy your Subway sandwiches. I'll show you Australia.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

Because they are chock full of cock. All right, we promised some spooky stories.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

And I think it's time because I actually have a doctor's appointment and I have to go do.

[Ed Larson]

All right, so we have to begin this.

[Henry Zabowski]

It is time. It is time. It is time.

[Ed Larson]

All right, so you're gonna go first.

[Henry Zabowski]

For some listener pastas. Ooh, scary stories from the audience.

[Ed Larson]

You got one. I got one.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes. I'm gonna read this one again. We're just gonna do smattering. So we're just trying to add more ghosts at Activity to the show. And so this is our way of getting us all used to the spooky waters of Halloween time. So, ladies and gentlemen, scared you, didn't I? Smoke a giant, pretend to be a skeleton for a little while and get ready to be spooked by some scary listener stories. It's a monkey noise. It's not a ghost noise. It's a monkey noise.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, well, a monkey could be scary if it's ripping your lips off.

[Henry Zabowski]

If it's a ghost. I was at a friend's co worker's apartment in West Hollywood. There were three of us having a girl's night after work. We were drinking some wine, gossiping about work and listening to music when one of the girls casually said she knew how to twerk while doing a handstand. Obviously, we said, prove it. And she proceeded to do a handstand with her feet leveraged against the front door and performed her expert level twerking. We all started hooting and hollering as you do and abruptly stopped when we heard someone pounding on the front door. It sounded like a large person banging with a closed fist. My friend opened the door with her ashtigs.

[Ed Larson]

No one was there.

[Henry Zabowski]

Oh yes, she with her butthole. She grabbed the doorknob. A true performer ready for Los Angeles. And suddenly a large person banging the door. No, she closed the door. She opened the door. No one was there. She closes the door, turns to us, shrugs. Then it happens again. She was still not next to the door, so she quickly flung it open. And again, no one there. The apartment was a flat in one of those really old buildings. It had two units downstairs and two upstairs. There was a single staircase going up and a small landing with an apartment to the left, right about 20ft away from each other. So not very accessible and not very many possible culprits. While we were trying to figure out who could be doing it and how they could get to the door and disappear so fast, we started again hearing what sounded like coins dropping around the apartment. And the banging happened again. Again, no one there. She texts all three of her neighbors, asking if anyone had knocked and they were being too loud. No one was home directly downstairs. The old lady across the hall was in bed, and the other downstairs neighbor also had a couple of people over and hadn't heard us. Meanwhile, I start to see small white shapes flying past the window, almost like birds. But it was dark out. We look out the window to the front lawn. Nobody's there. The knocking happens yet again and the twerking girl says she has to leave. I was supposed to stay the night show to get to yeah yeah, she got to go. I got to go twerk for Abraham Lincoln. I was supposed to stay the night with the other girl that was with us, but I decided, no. You know what? No, thank you. I'm going to get an Uber home, too. I get home, call my boyfriend, now my husband to tell him what happened when we were interrupted by a FaceTime call from the other two girls. They were both crying and outside walking to the last remaining girl's car and were heading to her place in Long beach because the pounding wouldn't stop. And it had happened while they were in the front of the door again, and they immediately opened, and absolutely no one was there. The girl that lived in the apartment stayed at our friends in Long beach for three. Three days until her roommate came back from vacation, so she didn't have to be alone in there. And she found pennies and dimes scattered around the floor. And when she opened the front window exactly right. She noticed there was a paper shoved between the iron Juliet balcony and the window door. It was renovated from the original, and there was about an inch from the balcony to the doors. Upon closer inspection, she discovered that it was. It was a bunch of her mail, which is what I'd seen flying around that window. And you can only get to the mail by entering the building with a key and opening the mailbox with a key.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zabowski]

I've always been sensitive to heavy energies, allegedly haunted spaces. And this is not the first or last time I had a weird experience, but it was by far the scariest. I refused to ever go back to her place. Maybe coincidentally, maybe not, all three of those girls turned out to be very, very, very not cool. Maybe something was trying to tell me.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, or maybe the ghost. Like, strippers, literally.

[Henry Zabowski]

That is my first.

[Ed Larson]

And he's like. He saw, and he's like. And he's throwing money at her.

[Henry Zabowski]

But I do think that there's something to the idea that the other chicks were not really cool and that there was something in their truck, because I find that very interesting. The idea of a disembodied noise. You can't control things because that's what's called apportionment.

[Ed Larson]

Mutations.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah, Apparitions.

[Ed Larson]

I believe apparitions are what you see.

[Henry Zabowski]

Apparitions.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Yeah. Which there wasn't because the white things were male. So that wasn't. That wasn't an aberration. Aberration is seeing you shut your mouth. You don't have to Google it.

[Henry Zabowski]

You mean like an EVP or phantom sound? Phantom.

[Ed Larson]

Now it's People. It's.

[Henry Zabowski]

The EVP is a type of thing that's called. It's when things fall from the ceiling. It's called, like, apportions or something like this. They say, we'll get it.

[Ed Larson]

You know, teleportation.

[Henry Zabowski]

You don't know. Know nothing.

[Ed Larson]

You know anything. I know that apparitions are the sighting of a ghost. Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, either way, yes, it's apportions.

[Ed Larson]

Apportations, Yes.

[Henry Zabowski]

A P, P, O, R T. That was. All right.

[Ed Larson]

So a poor use of words.

[Henry Zabowski]

No, it was actually very good. Actually quite good. All right, you go.

[Ed Larson]

By the way, my monkey noises were appropriate because Jane Goodall is now a ghost. A. Did you hear about what happened with. With her?

[Henry Zabowski]

What?

[Ed Larson]

Jane Goodall. So Jane Goodall passed away this week. The wonderful Jane Goodall, one of my heroes, to be honest with you. She died suddenly in her sleep, which, God bless her, she deserved it, thank Christ.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah. I'm glad she didn't die, like, in a fire.

[Ed Larson]

She was supposed to be giving a speech in Pasadena to a bunch of children and no one. And, like. And then she just didn't show up. And so the. The auditorium's full of children waiting for. For Jane Goodall to come talk to him.

[Henry Zabowski]

At least she didn't die in front of him.

[Ed Larson]

But someone had to come out and.

[Henry Zabowski]

Be like, she's dead, she's dead.

[Ed Larson]

And then all the children started crying and.

[Henry Zabowski]

Why would you do that? I guess they don't want to lie to the kids or whatever. But still, the afternoon, we could just be like, jane's late. Jane's going to come back. You know, like, well, let's just put a bookmark into this. They didn't tell everybody when. When stupid W was reading the little book that 911 was happening.

[Ed Larson]

They just. Yeah, they just came and told all the children that the person they're here to, like, talk about monkeys with them is dead.

[Henry Zabowski]

She died just like you're going to die, all right? You're going to grow old and you're going to die, no matter what you've done. To love chimps, you can love a chimp as much as you want. This one's called it's still going to be a Corpse.

[Ed Larson]

My haunted dorm room. From Courtney, which I think is Courtney, but they didn't put the tea in there.

[Henry Zabowski]

I'm sorry, Ferd.

[Ed Larson]

You apologizing to Courtney?

[Henry Zabowski]

To you, my friend.

[Ed Larson]

All right, we'll see how fast I can get through this. I wanted to share a true story from my freshman year dorm at the University of Wisconsin, Madison. Hey, I'm going to be there on Sunday with Logan Metz at comedy on State. Come check it out. But it'd be good. I hope you come. Courtney. Courtney, whatever your name is, come tell me. I woke up on my bunk bed suddenly in the early hours of Monday, January 23rd. My clock read 3:33am I glanced at the mirror on our door and I saw a girl with long dark hair in a white nightgown sitting on my futon. I turned to my head and she was still there, just staring at her reflection. My heart started racing and I yanked the blanket over my face. But every few minutes I peeked out, barely able to breathe. And she never moved. She just sat there staring at herself in the mirror for nearly two hours until I finally fell back asleep. She never left. The next day I kept it to myself because I didn't want to freak out my roommate. But the following night while. While my roommate and I were watching the Bachelor, I told her what I saw and her face went pale. She said she thought she'd seen me making coffee in the dark of night. But I'd never gotten up. I remembered the girl was wearing white. My roommate's said that she thought it was me in my white Arizona sweatshirt. But that sweatshirt was packed away. What really terrified us was this. I saw her at the futon. My roommate saw her at the coffee machine by the foot of her bed. In between the two of us, we were so shaken we didn't even sleep in our room for the next night. To this day, I have no logical explanation for this. And we've even debunked theories. Like someone could have snuck into our room since our door, it's automatically locked. A few years later, a friend brought this story up and told me that he'd seen something similar and even caught it on video. He was at a party filming his friend, when in the background a doorway, a girl with dark hair and a white nightgown walked past. When I saw the video, I nearly started crying. It was exactly what I'd seen all those years ago. Apparently she's a of copy common apparition at the end there.

[Henry Zabowski]

Apparition. Apportation is different than apparition. But that is. I mean, you know, like I know that you're like. You give and take ghost stories.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zabowski]

But I do think it's interesting.

[Ed Larson]

I think it's interesting you've seen the.

[Henry Zabowski]

Most ghosts of anybody I know.

[Ed Larson]

I think that sometimes people in college are drunk and see things in the night.

[Henry Zabowski]

Night interesting.

[Ed Larson]

And maybe she might have made coffee interesting. Did you smell coffee?

[Henry Zabowski]

Well, coffee is one. You mean? Who knows? It could also be part of. Just be a stagnant recorded memory of a person that used to live there a long time ago.

[Ed Larson]

Coffee is the color.

[Henry Zabowski]

So, guys, so who says we don't get spooky? We get spooky. We're gonna get more spooky.

[Ed Larson]

We got a couple more weeks. Yeah, Spooky time.

[Henry Zabowski]

I saw Christmas lights up the other day. Maybe want to burn the neighborhood.

[Ed Larson]

Are you sure they weren't Halloween nights?

[Henry Zabowski]

No, they were. Their Christmas slicer was red and green. So that's why you're going to live every day knowing for a fact that we're not going to let them take Halloween from us. I don't care.

[Ed Larson]

Also could be blood and weed.

[Henry Zabowski]

We could be. We also need a laugh at the fact that we completely didn't realize that Lawrence Krause, when we covered that bit last week of the guy. The guy confessing to killing his parents and taking their Social Security checks, that he ran for president. And he ran for president. Lawrence Krauss. We're gonna laugh about this, like. Yes. And you're going to. L. You're going to love the fact that he did a gigantic, really weird, anti Semitic, like, rundown. He's like a full weirdo anti vaxx. I know it doesn't seem like he would be.

[Ed Larson]

It seems like he was right on the level.

[Henry Zabowski]

I know.

[Ed Larson]

Great.

[Henry Zabowski]

In jail. You're going to love him. You're going to love him. But just so you know, he also. I found that out that he also ran for president. That's cool. And then he had a bunch of. In the article that he wrote, remember how he did that thing where he said, oh, you got to read the reasons why it was, like, deeply anti Semitic.

[Ed Larson]

No. It'd be cool if there was, like, some kind of criteria to become president. You know, if you, like, have to have, like, a law degree or anything.

[Henry Zabowski]

Get out of here, you weak.

[Ed Larson]

So we got lots of stuff going on. We interviewed, we talked lots of. We got. We did. Black Phone 2 is coming out.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Everyone checked it out, Loved it.

[Henry Zabowski]

It was really fun. We talked with Scott Derrickson, the director. They. We did a partnership with them.

[Ed Larson]

So.

[Henry Zabowski]

Awesome. We got to do it. Honestly, we got into really kind of surprising territory because he was not expecting us. Get into, like, Hellraiser and all of his previous stuff. So it's like, it's a really interesting interview and go check it out and go and buy tickets for Eddie And I live at the Metal Community center in Humboldt County. October 24th, go and check it out. We are doing a Halloween costume contest. Please show up in Custodia.

[Ed Larson]

We're going to bring some, some last podcast type prizes for you all. You know I got, I'm giving away my Aaron Hernandez book. I'm going to sign it. I'm going to make the boys sign it. My research book. I don't need it on my my shelf anymore. It's gonna be really fun of. You will like it. So it's going to you.

[Henry Zabowski]

And also remember, we are no longer in Cleveland. We are now in Akan.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. That's going to be on November 29th at the Goodyear Theater. Go switch over your tickets for that. And if you're in Akan, congratulations. Come see last podcast on the left.

[Henry Zabowski]

Am I allowed to say the code on here? Does that mean anybody get tickets if I put the code? If I say the code? I think you should hold off on the code. Yeah, because the code is a one word. But just know that hit us up and someone will tell you. If you don't know the code, there's a code word that they sent you in the e email from the Cleveland venue that will transfer the ticket over to the Akron venue. Yes, but it's a word. I can't tell you the word. It's one word though.

[Ed Larson]

Do you think it's Annabelle?

[Henry Zabowski]

No.

[Ed Larson]

Robert?

[Henry Zabowski]

No.

[Ed Larson]

My favorite dolls. Hey listen, we also got lots of shows this weekend. We're going to be at the Pap Seer in Milwaukee. Check that out. That's going to be on Saturday. And like I said, on Sunday I'm going to be a comedy at State doing stand up with Logan Metz. And then October 25th, we're going to to be in Oakland. Come check us out. That's going to be last podcast on the left proper. And then I. And then November 16, I'm doing stand up at Mic Drop Comedy in San Diego. And then Columbus, Ohio, side stories on November 30th. Oh yeah, that's going to be the Newport Music Hall. December 7th, Henry and I are going to be at Wise Guys Town Square in Las Vegas. That's December 7th. We're going to be in Vegas, baby. Coming. Check us out there. And then of course in Portland on December 12th and 13th, Revolution Hall. Check that out. Two nights. And then of course all the dates I listed earlier for 2026.

[Henry Zabowski]

Oh yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And this weekend I am doing my set on 8085, the SoCal sound. Come check me out. I am the artist in residence for this Saturday on 8085 the SoCal Sound, 6pm Pacific all the way to 7pm PM Eastern. Check out my set. It's gonna get funky. And I got one last thing I want to share with the people. This is a fun thing that Julie did, and I think everyone's gonna appreciate it. You like your Instagram stories. You like playing poop, Boop boop on the stories. You have fun with that.

[Henry Zabowski]

I don't.

[Ed Larson]

You know what you do? You go hit that little icon. You search Eddie Tunes. There's some Eddie Tunes gifts for you. I got gifts that you could add to your stories. How wonderful is that?

[Henry Zabowski]

Pretty great.

[Ed Larson]

I got gifts.

[Henry Zabowski]

It's another.

[Ed Larson]

I don't even understand it, but it exists.

[Henry Zabowski]

I just love that it's another wonderful opportunity for our audience.

[Ed Larson]

You love it?

[Henry Zabowski]

They just love it. They just love gifts. They. You know what? They're so. Our audience is so simple. That's all they need.

[Ed Larson]

That's all they need. The gifts are gifts.

[Henry Zabowski]

They aren't. They're free.

[Ed Larson]

You're free.

[Henry Zabowski]

All right, Kel, Satan, everyone.

[Ed Larson]

Hail me.

[Henry Zabowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Hail me, Ed Larson.

[Henry Zabowski]

Fuck Ed.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Eddie Toons. Check out my gifts assignment.

[Henry Zabowski]

Give them a gift.

[Ed Larson]

Give me a gift.

[Henry Zabowski]

Hey, listeners. Marcus Edden Henry here. A little bit of an announcement.

[Ed Larson]

You loving all the episodes of Last Podcast on the Left lately. Well, listen, now you can get even more from us.

[Henry Zabowski]

Squeeze it out of us if you want to hear new episodes ad free and unlock access to Last Podcast on the left seven days early. Subscribe to Sirius XM Podcast podcast plus on Apple Podcasts or visit siriusxm.compodcastplus to start your free trial today. Do it.