Side Stories: Sandwich Stories

Summary

Last Podcast on the Left – Side Stories: Sandwich Stories

Date: September 24, 2025
Hosts: Henry Zebrowski & Ed Larson

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Episode Overview

"Side Stories: Sandwich Stories" is a freewheeling, darkly humorous journey through recent news and personal anecdotes, reflecting the show’s signature mix of true crime, the bizarre, and caustic social commentary. Henry and Ed riff through everything from updates in the Jeffrey Epstein saga, football helmet debates, and UFO sightings in Denmark, to a sandwich shop arson over missing mayo, culminating, fittingly, in haunted house tales and listener letters. The episode oscillates between heavy news, absurdity, and cathartic banter—delivering both laughs and food for thought.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Live Show Recaps & Kansas City Antics

[01:27–04:43]

• The hosts reminisce about recent live shows in Kansas City and St. Paul, joking about how the city has become “too clean” due to “Taylor Swift money.”
• Irony abounds as they note car break-ins at their Kansas City show—right after reassuring fans about how safe the city is.
• They promise air fresheners to victims next time as tongue-in-cheek compensation.
• Notable quote:
  “If you were a member of the six people that had their cars smashed during the middle of the show... I just want to say I’m sorry we can offer nothing to you because I guess that’s just life.” (Henry, 02:07)

Announcement: Upcoming Halloween Costume Contest

[03:49–04:43]

• The Metel Community Center show on October 24th will feature a Halloween costume contest. Costumes aren’t mandatory, but highly encouraged; the vibe will be “a little spooky.”

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Jeffrey Epstein 50th Birthday Book: Listener Analysis

[04:50–15:13]

• Henry receives detailed responses from scientists about the cryptic, “mathy” content in Epstein’s infamous birthday book (specific pages discussed: 124–125, 181, 182–187, 189–192).
• The “science” is mostly self-congratulatory, full of esoteric jokes and references to transhumanism, immortalist ideas, and obscure math—described bluntly as “a way to jack off Epstein.”
• Nobel laureate Murray Gell-Mann, Steve Kosslyn, and Lee Smolin are identified as contributors.
• Recurring number 15 (as "the best number") is called out for its likely disturbing subtext.
• Notable quote:
  “All the science in the book appears to me as a way of jerking Epstein off. Right?” (Henry, 11:11)
• Henry pledges to continue reporting any Epstein updates:
  “I just want to make sure that no matter what we do here ... we make sure that Jeffrey Epstein’s story continues to go.” (Henry, 15:13)

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The Case of “Deforvid” and Celeste Revis

[15:44–18:48]

• Discussion turns to the scandalous murder case of the musician "Deforvid" (a.k.a. David), whose name and persona are mocked (“dumbest name I’ve ever heard”).
• His Tesla, containing the body of his likely underage girlfriend Celeste Revis, was found outside his home.
• Commentary on murderabilia: Fans are encouraged to send in any show merch before cancellation, for its potential collectible value.
• Notable quote:
  “His song is horrible. The song he made all the money is fucking horrible guys. But ... the rotting body of his ... girlfriend was inside of [his car].” (Henry, 16:36)

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Football, CTE, and the Ethics of Spectatorship

[18:55–22:46]

• Ed reflects on “good aspects” of football, like community and the food culture, but Henry and Ed acknowledge football’s inherent dangers (e.g., CTE, violence).
• Guardian caps (new concussion helmets) are discussed as lifesaving but "goofy"-looking; hosts mock the masculine resistance to safety gear.
• Notable quote:
  “Do you want to act goofy or do you want to look goofy?” (Henry, 20:42)
  “If you can make it not goofy, that’s the key. Someone do a sex tape in the helmet...” (Henry, 21:32)
• Noted: The suicide of former NFL player Rudy Johnson at 45 and the request to have his brain studied for CTE.

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The Struggle of Modern Boycotts & Choices

[22:46–25:45]

• Ed laments the challenge of “standing for too much” with various corporate and ethical boycotts—Disney+, Hulu, Amazon.
• Henry and Ed discuss the performativity vs. actual impact of consumer decisions, referencing Jimmy Kimmel’s return post-boycott.
• Media and nostalgia as “crack” are extensively riffed on.
• Funny analogy:
  “Like, you know what they. They talk about with rats? ...A lot of them will starve to death, death just coming to death.” (Henry, 25:45)

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Copenhagen UFO (Drone?) Shuts Down Airport

[28:55–34:18]

• Report: Copenhagen Airport halted air traffic due to a massive, mysterious “drone”—a green-lighted triangle that authorities couldn’t identify.
• This echoes recent “drone incursions” over New Jersey, Boston, Alaska, Yemen, and Michigan—authors joke about 'hobbyists' as cover for unexplainable events.
• Audio develops a skeptical, conspiratorial edge: Is this all “normal” now?
• Notable quote:
  “Same hobbyists that obviously terrorized New Jersey. Same hobbyists that obviously terrorized Boston… And we’re all acting like it’s normal.” (Ed, 33:51)

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Sandwich Stories: Mayo Rage-Induced Arson in Spain

[35:46–42:00]

• The titular story: A man in Spain, denied mayonnaise for his sandwich at a café, fetches gasoline and sets the café on fire. Thankfully, only material damage resulted.
• Henry and Ed explore the “righteous anger” of sandwich lovers, while reiterating it’s… an overreaction.
• Hellmann’s, the mayo brand, offers to pay for damages, promising, “you’ll never run out of mayonnaise again.”
  • Hellmann's statement read in parody “mayonnaise voice”:
    “Let us take care of the repairs and make sure your sandwiches never run out of mayonnaise again.” (Ed, 40:04)
• Both share personal sandwich grievances—including Ed’s own rage at a deli refusing to make an egg salad sandwich with their own egg salad.

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Listener Letters: Haunted Houses & Ghostly Grievances

[62:08–67:44]

• Read a listener’s account of living in a haunted historic Michigan home; subtle poltergeist activity tied to a former owner’s death.
• Henry relates his own “ghost in a box” experience—offering bourbon, weed, and horror swag to his resident spirit, Jason, whom he credits for mysterious grill malfunctions at home.
  • “I was grilling, and I came back to the grill and opened up, and... the temperature had really dropped ... all of the grill dials were shut off.” (Henry, 67:44)

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Odd News Quick Hits

• Oklahoma Tiger Handler Killed:
  [53:22–55:43]
  A Joe Exotic associate is fatally mauled by a tiger he raised; Ed and Henry discuss the folly of private zoos.
  • “You shouldn’t be experiencing love bites from giant jungle cats.” (Henry, 54:28)
• Meth Fumes at Animal Shelter:
  [56:05–59:00]
  The FBI accidentally exposes staff and animals to meth fumes by incinerating 2 lbs of confiscated meth at a Billings, MT animal shelter; chaos ensues as both animals and humans are stoned.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On the philosophical weight of condiments:
  “If you are a person ... that doesn’t eat condiments on your sandwich, you’re a pervert.” (Henry, 37:47)

• On PBS versus performative activism:
  “For me, it’s not economic ... it’s more principles. I just don’t want to be a part of it. I don’t think I’m making a difference.” (Ed, 24:20)

• Fun with ancient history:
  Debating who could eat a cloned Neanderthal, and riffing on ancient anatomy (“they couldn’t throw... over-the-shoulder motion”).

• On listeners’ cravings:
  The hosts’ visceral reactions to food disappointments are played for comedic effect, e.g.,
  “I was using baked beans as barbecue sauce.” (Ed, 42:33)

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• Kansas City Show Recap & Announcements — [01:27–04:43]
• Epstein Birthday Book Analysis — [04:50–15:13]
• Deforvid & Murderabilia Discussion — [15:44–18:48]
• Football/CTE/Safety Gear Rant — [18:55–22:46]
• Boycotts and Media Addiction — [22:46–25:45]
• Copenhagen UFO/Drones — [28:55–34:18]
• Sandwich Stories (Spain Arson, Deli Rage) — [35:46–47:01]
• Listener Letters (Hauntings, Ghost in a Box) — [62:08–68:14]

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Tone & Style

• Candid, irreverent, and darkly comedic: The hosts use sarcasm and gallows humor as a shield against the absurd and sometimes horrific realities they report.
• Interactive with their audience: Requests for stingers, reactions to previous episodes, and direct engagement via mail and social media.
• Pop-cultural and reference-heavy: Jokes and references span everything from Roman gladiators to Star Wars, police cam videos, and true crime lore.

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For New Listeners

This episode is a solid snapshot of “Last Podcast on the Left’s” unique blend: news analysis, unfiltered humor, personal stories, and a hint of the macabre. Come for the true crime and conspiracies, stay for the food grievances, sandwich philosophy, and spirited banter.

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Transcript

[Narrator/Announcer]

TV's number one drama, High Potential returns with star Caitlin Olsen as the crime solving single mom with an IQ of 160. Every week, Morgan uses her unconventional style and brilliance to crack LAPD's most perplexing cases. It's the perfect blend of humor and mystery. She's breaking the mold without breaking a nail. New episodes of High potential Tuesdays 10, 9 Central on ABC and stream on.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Hulu mint is still $15 a month for premium wireless. And if you haven't made the switch yet, here are 15 reasons why you should. One, it's $15 a month. Two, seriously, it's $15 a month. Three, no big contracts. Four, I use it. Five, my mom uses it. Are you, Are you playing me off? That's what's happening, right? Okay, give it a try. @mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment of $45 for three month plan. $15 per month equivalent required.

[Ed Larson]

New customer offer first three months only.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Then full price plan options available, Taxes and fees extra.

[Ed Larson]

See mintmobile.com there's no place to escape to. This is the last on the left side stories.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's when the cannibalism started. Side stories. Yes. We're cooking, guys.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, we are. Weed, weed, weed, weed, weed, weed, weed, weed, weed. Smoke that weed.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Bring me weed.

[Ed Larson]

Bring me weed.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Honestly, bring me weed. We went to great shows this weekend. Oh, yeah, truly so much fun this weekend, kc. We had fun in Kansas City. We had a blast in St. Paul. First thing I want to say at the very top of the show is that Eddie and I, we were so funny in Kansas City. Eddie. And one of the funny things that we said in Kansas City was we were like, man, this town, Kansas City used to be for real. Kansas City used to be a place and you'd get shot in the head. And now you guys got that Taylor Swift money. You guys are getting so clean, so nice.

[Ed Larson]

Nothing bad ever happens in Kansas City.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And I just want to say I'm sorry to everybody that was in our crowd. If you were a member of the six people that Heather cars smashed into during the middle of the show, I just want to say, while we're literally.

[Ed Larson]

Telling you how safe your town is.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I just want to say I'm sorry we can offer nothing to you because I guess that's just life. That's the life I guess we've all chose. You chose it by living in Kansas City. But what I can give you is a very hearty thoughts and prayers. Thoughts and prayers and thank you for your attendance of the show. And the next time, I swear, they all come.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Everybody who got their car broken into. Next time we're in Kansas City, each one of you gets a free air freshener.

[Ed Larson]

Air freshener?

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yep.

[Ed Larson]

Well, who knows? That could be why they broke into the car in the first place.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Hey, people are desperate to be fresh. My name is Henry Zabrowski. This is side Stories. We're sitting here with Ed Larson.

[Ed Larson]

Hi, how are you? Everybody, welcome down to Kansas City, where car windows get broken into every. Goddamn.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Your voice.

[Ed Larson]

It's rough.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. All right.

[Ed Larson]

I was getting my balls lowered.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes, you should. Let's just. Let's get through some announcements because obviously, you guys know nothing of consequence happened this weekend.

[Ed Larson]

Nothing.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Nothing. It's so just. Oh, just. Just fun to relax. Watching television on the news and having the president tell you to your face that he hates you. Yeah, it's just kind of nice. It's refreshing. I never get talked to directly.

[Ed Larson]

It was easier to take when there's, like, big fireworks behind.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's my.

[Ed Larson]

That's how we got to handle it. It was a lot cooler then.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Absolutely. And it just. I just hope that those shirts that his wife were selling don't sell out.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Over his warm body.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

All right, let's continue. So we have here in October 24th, we want to make this announcement at the Metel Community center in Humb. We have. We are officially announcing.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

If you're coming to this show, we are doing a Halloween costume contest.

[Ed Larson]

It's the week before Halloween. I want to see what you got. You live out in the woods. You got nothing but time. I want to see what you make out of these costumes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

We're going to have fun. I'm going to almost. I'm. I don't want to do the thing. We're going to make costumes mandatory.

[Ed Larson]

No, no. You, Peter, could dress like a human being and show up.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Sort of. Sort of. But the goal is.

[Ed Larson]

Tell me you're your uncle or something.

[Henry Zebrowski]

We're going to have a lot of fun. Billy Wayne Davis, he's already got his costume planned. I can't wait for my costume. We've been tooling it, and I just want to just say, if you're going to come out to the Humboldt show, know that it's going to get a little spooky.

[Ed Larson]

It's going to get wild. I can't wait for that. That's the Matteo Community Center. Friday, October 24th. Enjoy your life. Come and visit us there.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, buddy. It's going to be good. All right, let's start for the. As we begin, we'll start with some serious news.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Because we have a little bit of serious news to cover. I got a really fantastic series of responses about updates. These are updates. Updates.

[Ed Larson]

I like that. New stinger time.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Can we get a Stinger?

[Ed Larson]

Can we get.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, no, don't touch me. Oh, no, don't touch me.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, we need an Epstein stinger at this point.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes. I don't know if anybody saw the very top this morning. Did you see that someone had snuck a 12 foot bronze statue in front of the Washington Monument of Trump holding hands giddily with Jeffrey Epstein?

[Ed Larson]

It's friendship Month.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It is amazing that it was. It was dropped in the middle of the night. No one knows where they made this thing, how they were able to put it out without a combination of foam.

[Ed Larson]

Resin, wood and wire.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, interesting. And what I find interesting as well is that I thought that he had the National Guard positioned in Washington D.C. just ready to go at a moment's notice, ready to get at any bit of crime possible. And then somehow artists managed to create a beautiful artistic tribute to the hypocrisy of our current administration. And just like they just went out without a hitch.

[Ed Larson]

Well, I believe that, that they said it's going to stay up until Saturday, so I think they actually rented the space.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's amazing.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, God. I just, that's just so.

[Ed Larson]

I think they filled out the paperwork and it gets to stay there for a little while.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They really got good for them. It is amazing. And I just. It is so. It's just so worth it. But let's go. Let's, let's, let's take it back.

[Ed Larson]

Well, one thing I wanted to mention just real quick. I know we didn't get too deep in the weeds. This Jimmy Kimmel's coming back less than a week later. But in that same breath, I just saw this Disney plus raising the rates. They're making it more expensive today. They chose today to tell us that they're going to. They just.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It's in grifter season. It doesn't matter. It just doesn't matter. Nothing matters. And everyone's just so relieved that I could finally see their stupid Disney again. This is just like, I just am so upset. I'm just get so upset.

[Ed Larson]

As a, as a registered Disney adult, I'm keeping it canceled. Wow. Keeping a cancel. I'm keeping a cancer. Yeah, I just, I'm at least going to go at least a year without it. I'm going to go a year without it. I'm. Well, I'm going to. If they, they keep on the good and ready. Stay nice. I'll stick around.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Listen, any single time that you have a unnatural need for Disney, I'll describe to you a story about a 12 year old Indian girl that gets purchased by a 30 year old white man that then kind of scones her away from her family and makes vicious love to her over and over and over again. And that's a movie that's called Pocahontas. So you just got to remember that right there. So anytime you got. I'll always break those down for you.

[Ed Larson]

I appreciate that.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Anytime you want. So let's cover a little bit of what we covered last week. I got great responses from. I just asked for a general call of scientists to go through the Epstein 50th birthday book and explain to me what some of these weird cryptic science based inside jokes that were put in this book. What do they mean? What's happening? And I got some very interesting responses. So I would like for everyone, if you are at home, I would like to go to your, if your bookmark where you have the Jeffrey Epstein birthday book saved. That is where we're gonna hold. Where you're gonna go over to the coffee table, type in Jeffrey Epstein 50th birthday book. Okay. You're gonna look at that PDF, open it up. Yep, it's the one with the tits in it. All right, so here we go. We're gonna talk a little bit. I'm gonna walk you through this. First one comes from an electrical engineer.

[Ed Larson]

It's kind of interesting how the Jeffrey Epstein book has become a PDF file.

[Henry Zebrowski]

No, it's really, really great. This is really great. All right, so there are four main sections that deal with math science in the birthday book. All right, pages 124 to 125, 181, 182 to 187 and 189 to 192. So please open your pages to 124 to 125. These pages are equating Epstein to great minds for discovering the beautiful number 15. It references perfect numbers and other math stuff, but essentially a made up equation to say that 15 is the best age. Wonder what that means. Page 181.

[Ed Larson]

Wow. Who signed it that?

[Henry Zebrowski]

We'll get to that. That's the next email. Page 181 appears to be an inside joke about E equals MC squared, but appears to be making reference to page 118 in the second stanza of the poem by birds and by bucks, C's and M's are his keys. My guess, B, M and C was a way of saying Epstein something like my money is all from B, B's, C's and M's.

[Ed Larson]

What does that mean?

[Henry Zebrowski]

Don't know. Cryptic. Okay, something that's just one of those, right?

[Ed Larson]

Don't know before Christ.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Just can't be. He can't be. I don't think Christ is here.

[Ed Larson]

Price is here. He isn't here any longer.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Not in this PDF. Page 182 to 187 are all about evolution, numbered sets and game theory. But it's mainly a way to jack off Epstein as some form of more evolved human. First bit is just mathematical formula of evolution. Second bit is just saying that you can make infinite combinations of countable things and that through working together but punishing those who portray you and occasionally forgiving them is how we continue to quote win evolution. Frightening. Pages 182 to 192 is just string theory nonsense. I say nonsense because it got a lot of funding and made all these grand promises of creating new technology from it. But it's an untestable concept that has no real world applications and it's just a money pit. So all the science in the book appears to me as a way of jerking Epstein off. Right? So that was the one thing that I thought was very, very interesting. There's a lot of other stuff where he says that. There's like there was one email that he said it got. It was a lot of scientists jerking off at him.

[Ed Larson]

Okay. Ostensibly showing them how smart they are.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Writing things that only other people who are in deep within their niche world of science, which mostly involves transhumanism, people becoming immortal, people wanting to jump evolution. Like the very fringe big money scientists that essentially they attract money from billionaires that want to live forever. And so did someone at least put here who the people were that signed them. So one was 79, 179 and 80 that was signed by Murray Gelman. Gelman is a Nobel Prize winning physicist famously developing the theory of quantum chromodynamics. Which is describes quarks as elemental elementary particles that are the fundamental constituents of protons and neutrons. Great.

[Ed Larson]

No one by the name of Murray should be fucking someone under the age of 80.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I mean Murray is specifically a guy that should be covered in soup. Yeah, I only want to talk to a guy named Murray if I'm asking. That's Murray.

[Ed Larson]

That's Murray.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And he's a funny, funny little guy. He's Making a yelling face. I don't know why he's doing that, but Murray should be eating matzo ball soup in a diner somewhere. Not at Jeffrey Epstein's birthday party. This is the. He said the doodle on page 179 with the red, green and blue blobs represent quarks in his theory. And then he's just a bunch of questions. Open questions in science. That's what all this is, is open questions in science.

[Ed Larson]

Okay, put onto this now, Epstein, like a science nerd.

[Henry Zebrowski]

No, science third. I guess you could maybe say that he was trying to purchase fringe science. Okay, so you could say he was a science nerd or whatever you call these various. Between physics and chemistry and biology, all these different places you were talking. Because you also know that in his New Mexico ranch, I believe it was in New Mexico. The Jeffrey Epstein's New Mexico ranch. I just.

[Ed Larson]

So he was trying to buy immortality.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

And then he committed suicide.

[Henry Zebrowski]

So he has this place called Zorro Ranch in Stanley, New Mexico, where he had entire. He had his own gynecological office and research center inside of his home so that he didn't have to leave. So we can get his. He can. He can go and put people in stirrups right in his home.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, that's nice.

[Henry Zebrowski]

So he was really a lot of fertility experts, stuff like that. So he was. Yeah, he was a nerd. So Steve Costlin, if you go to page 181 of the birthday book, who. Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, you can see here that was signed by Steve Costlyn. This is. He wrote a sketch with equations. This is the guy that did The E equals MC squared stuff that says straight up that 15 is the best number. Okay, and then Lee Smolin, pages 189 to 190.

[Ed Larson]

Do you know who that glass guy is?

[Henry Zebrowski]

Just a scientist man.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Another big scientist man. Lee Smolin. These diagrams look to be related to Lee Smolin's research in quantum gravity, where if you zoom into space time to extremely small distances, the fabric is no longer smooth, but discretized. Discretized. I don't know what that means. I think the cones are light cones. Largely. It's all horseshit.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Basically everyone's saying the same thing. It's just ways for. It is esoteric scientific principles to show your buddy that you are super smart. And then Jeffrey Epstein gets super hard looking at a 15 year old. And you like that because you're a scientist getting money from him.

[Ed Larson]

Okay, there you go.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yep. So, all right.

[Ed Larson]

That's appreciate all you scientists that now, now that you've done that. Go back to work. Get back to the work.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Get out there. You gotta do something else. Okay, tell me something else. No, it's very frightening. So I just want to make sure that no matter what we do here at Last podcast on the left we make sure that Jeffrey Epstein's story continues to go. Every single time there is an update. I am going to talk about it here on side stories.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And I don't care if you even get sick of it. That's why we need a. We need like a Stinger.

[Ed Larson]

We do need a Stinger and we.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Need an update Stinger. So Honestly, side stories lpotl gmail.com if you want to send us an Epstein singer. Nothing would make me happier.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You know that would be amazing if we could get some good old fashioned, just some 15 year old vocals on there. That'd be awesome. So Blood Young Blood. We actually performed at the same venue that he performed at In 2020 today, this weekend in Kansas City. And why even comment? I even said this right before the show where it's like I'm sick of being everyone yelling at me. So why am I commenting on things that are just gonna make people yell at me?

[Ed Larson]

I tell you one thing, he's no deforvid.

[Henry Zebrowski]

No, he is no deforvid. He is no deforvid. They finally canceled his tour. Those of you that don't know deforvid otherwise known as David. It is David spelled no Torvid. His. His name's fucking David.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It's the dumbest name I've ever heard for somebody ever. The fact that he's got a four in there. I just think he's so stupid and so not talented and just the dumb. His song is horrible. The song he made all the money is fucking horrible guys. But he was found his Tesla that was in his name that was found outside of his home that was towed the rotting body of his which seems to be maybe his year old girlfriend was inside of it. So we that all of this is still alleged. It's all still coming out but we know that they had matching tattoos. He had mentioned her by name in songs. Her crew. His crew had mentioned her by name. Like we. It seems that it was all together. What was her name again?

[Ed Larson]

Celeste.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Celeste Revis. And she. We'll see what happens. This is obviously it's all still alleged but they've had a full on corpse in their hands attached to his car for pretty much a week and he got to do, like, three shows.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. And she's been missing since 2024.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

And it's September.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, yeah. You remember when Celeste Revis's body was found? That's really one of the saddest things that Earth, Wind, and Fire has ever reminded me of. If you bought the tickets months ago, are you still going to the show? If he's in town to forbed. Yeah. If you have your ticket, you bought it months ago. You're disgusting. But if he's in town, if he's coming to town or the show's canceled. But I mean, before, because, you know.

[Ed Larson]

Please.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Before. Yes. You know what I would say, Honestly, what's hard is that as a ghoul, is that if you can get one of those pieces of merch before he's canceled fully, like, once he does not performing anymore, you might be able to sell that. That's murder, Bill. That's murderabilia. So if you got. There's anybody at those shows. Oh, there's a bunch of people. If there's anybody at this show that bought their shirt that wants to get rid of it, send it to P O. Box 470, North Hollywood, California, 91603. Because we've also become the other main channel. Talking about deformed.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes. At this point, I'm almost becoming a fan.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, I tried. I listened to a bunch of it. Couldn't do it.

[Henry Zebrowski]

He's not talented and he.

[Ed Larson]

But he might be talented.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Well, yes. Maybe he just says it right.

[Ed Larson]

I think he might be talented, and.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Maybe he was not for me. I think he was distracted by having sex with the child. Yes.

[Ed Larson]

And then distracted by, you know, her murder.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's the thing. It's super distracting. So hard. You can't plan that stuff. Except if you do it, then you did plan it.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, another one last thing I wanted to say is, you know, the. The Aaron Hernandez episode episodes have come out at this point. The. The last one's coming out for everyone on Friday. And I just want to say I have been thinking about it really hard, and I feel like I didn't. Like, there are good aspects to football.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You. We talked about this. This. Literally we're sitting in the airport. Yeah, we were talking about this because it's true.

[Ed Larson]

Like, I was just, like, really mad.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You were allowed. You had an emotional response to your own material. And I think at the very end, you were joking. You were like, oh, yeah. Look, the thing is, though, is that you. People like football, and people choose to play football.

[Ed Larson]

It brings people Together. It brings families together, you know, like, people who, like, don't like their families, like, still get together and watch football with them. I think that's beautiful thing. Yeah. You know, it brings a lot of money to the bar industry. Chicken wings. I'm a big fan of chicken wings.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Super big into chicken wings. I love sliders. Y' all know me.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And without football and sliders and like, I don't know. But I. I guess the key here is, is that truly we forget which. It's a big tenet for me. You choose if you want to play football. It is. You're taking this risk.

[Ed Larson]

Well, a lot of people look at as an escape out of poverty.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

And so I. I think that's like a big part of it is like, yeah, you do make the choice, but you also don't have many choices.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And they do have a new helmet that you can get, like, apparently. What is it called? It's called like, the goggler or something. Like, there's like a funny name that they have for it where they have a new concussion, like, ready helmet. But a lot of the guys are having problems wearing it because they think it looks goofy.

[Ed Larson]

Well, yeah, I mean, it's. That is.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, the guardian caps. That's what this is. Yeah. Like, they think it looks goofy and nobody wants to do it because, I.

[Ed Larson]

Mean, it does look goofy. But at the same time, do you.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Want to act goofy or do you want to look goofy?

[Ed Larson]

Right.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Do you want to be so goofy you're killing your fucking family because you.

[Ed Larson]

Think football player and could beat up.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Most humans if someone made for I.

[Ed Larson]

Defyouts look goofy, but if they don't have the helmet on, they're going to fucking just disappear into space.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I would like you big fuckers in the NFL to defy. Okay, come on, guys. Let's think about this. I know. We're all celebrating toxic masculinity. I love it, too. I like it. I'm actually on the other side of Eddie some of the times because I actually believe in sort of the Roman style. I get it. I get that there's like a group catharsis. Like, I get it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But it's like, be the bigger. Literally, the bigger dude, put the dumb fucking stupid cap on your helmet. I know it looks stupid. And the second somebody makes fun of you for it, you beat the living shit out of them.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And then you have everybody else do the same so that. Guess what? Who will never. What they'll never do ever again. No one will ever make fun of a football player with the stupid goopy hat on them for the rest of their lives. All right? That's your job. If you can make it not goofy, that's the key. Someone do a sex tape in the helmet with the hat on. Getting blown by the hottest woman. What are these?

[Ed Larson]

That'll actually probably do really well, these NFL players.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It's in your hands, and that's what you can do. You got to market it yourself, make it cool.

[Ed Larson]

Bengals great Rudy Johnson committed suicide at 45 years old, and he wants his brain to be looked at for cte.

[Henry Zebrowski]

He should have worn a goofy ass cap.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, that happened today.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. That's sad.

[Ed Larson]

So. So maybe I. Maybe I. Maybe I don't take it back.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They see, you just don't.

[Ed Larson]

Maybe. Maybe that's.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I just think that you're allowed. You're literally allowed to express both of these things.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I think so. I think so.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But you loved it for too long.

[Ed Larson]

I really did. It was a huge part of my life for 40 years.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. And I think that it's not even I. Playing is one thing versus the watching. Yeah, that for the rest of us. Weirdly, I do think football does serve a purpose.

[Ed Larson]

I mean, you love police cam videos in that.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I love them. My new algorithm has been awesome, too, because I've been getting the ones where something switched and because, like, for a while, I was, like, getting a little too. Because I get sad when it's always, like, entitled woman, blah, blah, blah, entitled man. I was like, no, no, no. But now mine's finally switching to where I want it to be, which is theme parks. Oh, my God. People getting tossed out of Disney's my favorite shit.

[Ed Larson]

Oh. I mean, that's cool. That's a lot of fun.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's my favorite shit. Just seeing, like, an unhinged woman with her titty coming out of her weird sports bra, screaming about how she's gonna punch Mickey in the face. It's just. God, it just brings a. Like, a piece to me. So I understand. What. We all like problematic things sometimes, and I just think it's okay to. I think that we should have more allowances.

[Ed Larson]

I think it is. Okay. But you should know exactly, like, why.

[Henry Zebrowski]

What you're doing and what it comes from.

[Ed Larson]

I was, like. The other thing I was thinking about this weekend after I was canceling my Disney, Disney plus, and Hulu was, do I stand for too much? Do I like, like, like. It was just like, like. Like I'm running out of things to watch. Like, I got. I Can't drink certain bottles of water. I can't fucking. You know, like, I'm not buying Amazon packages anymore.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You're just saddled with a conscious.

[Ed Larson]

I'm like, you just.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You're saddled with. With these feelings. And I do, I do. I. I watch you and I, I understand you're very good. And I think that some of these economic boycotts work and I think some of them are very performative.

[Ed Larson]

I don't think they're. It's for me, it's not economic for me, it's more principles. It's principles. Yeah. I don't, I just don't want to be a part of it. I don't think I'm making a difference. I know I'm not making a difference.

[Henry Zebrowski]

We know that the Disney thing did make a difference when it came to the Jimmy Kimmel deal. We know that it's all about the money. No one gives a about. About anybody. Like it's all about the money. So it's. They've. They lost. They hit any. Needed to hit to bring Jimmy Kimmel back to ignore the fcc. Which also I find interesting is that it shows they could have ignored them the whole time.

[Ed Larson]

Absolutely. No. They're historic cowards.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Very much so.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But also I get they. But they let themselves let us tell them what to do.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And that's an important lesson to learn.

[Ed Larson]

And now at three more dollars a month, you can get ad free for 18.99amonth now.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh my God, it's start.

[Ed Larson]

Remember it started at 6.99 during COVID Oh, yeah. Yeah. And it up to 1899.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They know they just get you used to. They get you a hook roll their dumb garbage.

[Ed Larson]

It really is like a crack dealer.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, buddy. And that's why they ramped up all the Star wars and they ramped up all the superhero stuff. Because that's what people get addicted to. And they're attached to it by their emotions from their childhood. And then they're just tapping that button again and again. Like, you know what they. They talk about with rats? About how like when they have the food button or the sex button, they have the button that makes them come and they have the one that makes them eat. About how a lot of them will starve to death. Death just coming to death.

[Ed Larson]

Coming. Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes. That's what they do to us.

[Ed Larson]

You dirty rat.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It's Mickey all the way down. So.

[Ed Larson]

Speaking of horror stories, do you ever feel like there's something spooky going on with your wi Fi then It's time to check out t mobile 5G home Internet. With their fast speeds and effortless setup, T Mobile Home Internet takes the mystery out of getting online. Just plug it in and you're connected in 15 minutes or less and you get all that and more at a great price guaranteed for five years so you don't have to worry about any jump scares on your bill. Get T Mobile Home Internet and get online with a simple setup, their fast speeds and a five year price guarantee. Visit t mobile.com homeinternet to check. Availability guarantees monthly prices of fixed wireless 5G Internet data exclusions like taxes and and fees apply. Service delivered via 5G network speeds vary due to factor affecting cellular networks. Guarantee exclusions and [e-mail] HomeInternet TV's number.

[Narrator/Announcer]

One drama High Potential Returns with star Caitlin Olsen as the crime solving single mom with an IQ of 160. Every week, Morgan uses her unconventional style and brilliance to crack LAPD's most perplexing cases. It's the perfect blend of humor and mystery. She's breaking the mold without breaking a nail. New episodes of High potential Tuesdays 10, 9 Central on ABC and stream on Hulu.

[Henry Zebrowski]

This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Whether you're just starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. And I will not be destroyed by these children that keep purchasing my business. Yes, I have lost horsepix.com and yes, currently I am in for some form of tete a tet with Putin's daughter who purchased Umu paintings.com so now I'm a man alone who's decided I'm out of the sales business. Yeah, I'm starting a new website. It's called Henry Zabrowski's Feet.com and that's because I'm sick of Wikipedia going out there and slandering my good name on my feet. All right? My feet are good and this is all I have. So you needed support me and Squarespace. Squarespace makes it all possible. It makes a podcast possible. Squarespace gives you everything you need to offer services and get paid. Squarespace domains make it easier to find the best name for your business at one fair, all inclusive price. No hidden fees or add ons required. Head to squarespace.com left for a free trial when you're ready to launch. Launch Use offer code left to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain. All right, we got some good new news. News you can Use Copenhagen airports shut down by UFOs. Whoa, dude, this was UFOs. So they are. It's technically drones. So let me send you this information.

[Ed Larson]

So they're not you. They're not. They are identified.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They are unidentified drones.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But they do look wildly similar to what we had here in New Jersey in the States.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Now, this was over Denmark. This was after the Copenhagen airport. Now, if you can see here, there is an object that swept over the airport, shutting down traffic. It is a gigantic drone that has. You see how it's got edges all around the side of it? Like it's a giant, weird triangle. Yeah, it's a giant triangle in the sky. Looks like a giant triangle in the sky. Several police officers, they said that they saw it shoot a what could only be described as a spotlight.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Down onto the ground. Now, what makes this extremely.

[Ed Larson]

Suck anything up?

[Henry Zebrowski]

It didn't. No. No. But what makes this extremely interesting is that this is a part of the world where the airspace is extremely watched. Yeah, this is a highly observed part of the world.

[Ed Larson]

Well, we saw they were just in restricted airspace over Yemen.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But so that was like, one thing. And that bounced in and out, right? That was like a thing that flew past and they shot a missile at it. It bounced off and it kept going. No one's asking anything. Right. This story is interesting because the. Apparently according to their services, because what's nice about Europe right now is that Europe, it's like, fucked. They're, like, way freer than we are right now, and they can say really anything they want. And they can actually maybe investigate some stuff. So the cops are saying in this, to the police, being like, no one knows what this is and why that's significant is because they have been watching Russian drones come over the border into NATO territory, and they've been kind of like. They've almost become like weather reports in Denmark.

[Ed Larson]

Interesting.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Where they send out messages on the news saying there might be drone activity, blah, blah, blah. Like, they give warnings almost that there's going to be drones in the sky. They're doing these various things and. And none of those alarms went off. They said they're not Russian, that they're not. They have no identification markers. We didn't know what they are.

[Ed Larson]

They're taking their time.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They. Yes, every time. But the thing was, it was green, Right. Which is not necessarily standard. They said it was green lights coming out of it. It does have, like, this. The same interesting stuff.

[Ed Larson]

It's cruising.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It's fairly solid. It has blinking lights on. It that looks like it might be a human made aircra. We don't know what its origin is. It was kind of searching for things around the airport. And part of is to understand that they shut down the airport. Yeah, they did know what it was. Same thing would happen in New Jersey.

[Ed Larson]

Where in Boston.

[Henry Zebrowski]

There is no way that they're gonna just let something zip around during. One of the most sensitive points in like this is like a. We're talking about world War like area. Right. That we're in right now. We're in like that at that temperature going on right now in the world.

[Ed Larson]

Seems fine to me.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It's just this thing where you're like, why this seems like.

[Ed Larson]

Did someone follow it? Like, do we know where it went?

[Henry Zebrowski]

No, they said it went. It just went. And then they didn't see it anymore.

[Ed Larson]

Interesting.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It just circled around the airport and then zipped right back out.

[Ed Larson]

And it went so fast like no one could follow it.

[Henry Zebrowski]

No, they just watched it go. Well, because for a while there was miscommunication about what it would like, what it was. At first everyone, just because people are used to seeing drone activity, they said that it was weird because normally there would be like an announcement that there might be drone activity. And then it was just. And then it's just shutting down the airport and everybody's panicking and nobody knows.

[Ed Larson]

This is like a big ass drone.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's a big ass drone.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. That's not just like a normal like little thing you throw up there. Like no drone show. And it's a bunch of drones. Drones. Like this is one big.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, it is not.

[Ed Larson]

It's almost the size of a plane.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It's specifically not a hobby drone. This came out from the press conference this morning. Copenhagen Airport first.

[Ed Larson]

So it's either like spy or UAP.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Fucking knows. Copenhagen Airport first observed the drones around 8:30pm Monday evening. The drones came from different directions and were observed in different positions. According to Copenhagen Police, it is a cape. There must be a capable actor behind it, meaning an actor with the capacity, will and tools to show themselves in this way. So far, Copenhagen Airport has been affected by 100 cancellations and expects further delays during the day. According to the police, they chose not to shoot down the drone as, quote, the airport is an unfortunate place for something to fall from the sky. The police have activated the armed forces as a cooperation partner. The police would not disclose whether ships have been observed in connection with the case, but it was suggested that ships are a part of the investigation. So right now we have no idea what's going on.

[Ed Larson]

Arizona. All right.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Same hobbyist that obviously terrorized New Jersey. Same hobbyists that obviously terrorized Boston. And obviously the same hobbyist Arizona that was floating objects over Alaska. And the same hobbyists that were floating objects over Michigan that we actively shot out in. The same hobbyist that send something over our protected airspace in Yemen in which we also shot at and couldn't identify. And we're all acting like it's normal.

[Ed Larson]

You know, I really hope I see a movie about this soon.

[Henry Zebrowski]

UFO dot movie. It's funny. You should go to UFO dot movie and give me money to do the best movie about UFOs you've ever seen since Fire in the Sky. I swear it's not just me making love to Jenna Hayes. I've seen people already saying that. It's not an excuse to make love to Jenna Hayes. She's not in the business anymore. We will not be doing full penetration. It is just a small part of the film. She's playing a character in the film film. So just come give me money. UFO movie. You're paying for your ticket ahead of time. And I said this before time. If we can get to a thousand backers, I'm going to do a watch along of some of my UFO DVDs that will. That's like one of the first little prizes.

[Ed Larson]

Oh hell yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. So please give me just a small.

[Ed Larson]

Amount of money and if not, when's the Kickstarter over?

[Henry Zebrowski]

In like 24 days.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, really? So we really gotta cook this baby.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh yeah. It's all. It's awful proceeding wager.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

The whole thing's difficult.

[Ed Larson]

I really want to be in this movie. So please.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. Or put him in. He's no choice.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, I'll probably. I'll end up working for free.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And also I'm about to announce a partnership with. I'm gonna specifically say. I am going to say contacting the desert is also coming to help do this as well. So we have a lot of people. Like again. This is gonna be for real.

[Ed Larson]

Oh man, I can't wait for my next context of the desert. Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You guys say every shoot for episodes.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Here's a really fun one. I mean it's bad that it happened, but man, sometimes the news just makes me chuckle.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yep.

[Ed Larson]

All right, so cafeteria. Las Postas.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Ed Larson]

So a man went to get a sandwich at a restaurant at a cafe in Spain.

[Henry Zebrowski]

To Spain.

[Ed Larson]

Spain. Okay. He wanted us. He wanted a sandwich. The he said do. Can I get some mayonnaise Good sandwich. Right. Can I get a packet of mayonnaise?

[Henry Zebrowski]

He wanted a packet of mayonnaise with the sandwich. And I'm gonna stay straight up. First of all, packet of mayonnaise is, sadly, it is the saddest way to distribute mayonnaise.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, for sure.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You know, like, that's like him even asking for a packet of mayonnaise. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

When someone puts it on a spoon and just, like, flicks it. Yeah, that's how I like to get my mayonnaise. But, yeah, so he went. He asked for a packet of mayonnaise. They said, we don't have mayonnaise. Mayonnaise. And so he went next door to a gas station.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Absolutely. Yeah. And did he get mayonnaise? No, no.

[Ed Larson]

He went and he got a bunch of gasoline, and then he went back.

[Henry Zebrowski]

To the restaurant and he asked for mayonnaise again.

[Ed Larson]

Then we burned it down. Burned down the gas station.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Wow. Should have had mayonnaise.

[Ed Larson]

Wow. We burned down the cafe.

[Henry Zebrowski]

He burned down the cafe.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Okay, so now this is. But Hellman. Oh, my God. Look at the explosion of flame. Holy, dude.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, well, it's gas, man. Gas goes up fast. That's the whole thing.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Wow.

[Ed Larson]

It goes up very fast.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Over mayonnaise.

[Ed Larson]

Over mayonnaise.

[Henry Zebrowski]

All right, this is.

[Ed Larson]

I. As is missed. I understand. I just. Obviously, what this man did is wrong, but I do understand getting very angry over sandwiches.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Let's just put it this way. Okay. Let's just put it this way. My. My Audi. Our audience gets it, right? Our audience gets it.

[Ed Larson]

I'm not saying do this. I'm saying carry mayonnaise.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It's a sandwich. All right, let's just. Let's just break it down for Hustle Second here. It's a sandwich shop.

[Ed Larson]

If I'm at a mayonnaise and I run a sandwich shop, first thing I'm.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Doing in the store, I'm sending a runner to go get mayonnaise. Because what are two things that must be on a sandwich either way? Mayonnaise or mustard.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

If you are a person. And I mean this with all sincerity, if you're a person that doesn't eat condiments on your sandwich, you're a pervert.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, that's weird.

[Henry Zebrowski]

We're a problem. You're a problem with. You're like. You're. I know I'm gonna get a lot of feedback on this, but please do. Sure. Absolutely. I live water.

[Ed Larson]

And then you hold it in your mouth and you take a bite of the sandwich.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I live for this. Yeah. What do you. Do you get yourself, like, nervous, so your mouth gets all filled with liquid and then you bite in a sandwich?

[Ed Larson]

Ketchup on a roast beef sandwich.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Ew.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You just made me almost throw up.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, man.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But this is the thing. That's why. So, yeah, I think in many ways, this is what one would call a Spanish overreaction. But I think that when it comes down to you're a freedom fighter, you're in Spain, one of the big places that said no to fucking the dictatorship, right? Big old place filled with freedoms, right? You go to get that sandwich, and all you want is mayonnaise, liquefy that sandwich enough for you to eat it. And then you find out that this place doesn't have mayonnaise. And then you begin to sort of put all the steps together, being like, oh, only perverts and predators don't use mayonnaise and mustard on their sandwiches. Then you start thinking, oh, my God, is this the real Comet Pizza?

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Am I need to shut down this human trafficking cafe because this. They're selling me a signal. So I'm going to go straight to get, I guess, like, because I don't know what gasoline is like in Spain. Is it coming like cabernet?

[Ed Larson]

No. You probably just got like, one of those little red to go baggies.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Always a big zig block bag. And then. So maybe he thought he was doing.

[Ed Larson]

Something right, but he didn't burn the whole place down. I was wrong. It only caused about anywhere between 8,000 and $11,000 in damage. And here's the good news news. Hellman says they're paying for it and they're never going to run out of mayonnaise again. Isn't that nice? Hellman's knocking it out of the park.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But I also feel like Hellman's is almost slightly shading them by saying them, you'll never run out of mayonnaise again. You know what I mean? Like, almost being like. It's almost. They sort of like I'm putting words in Hellman's mouth, but it seems that they're sort of even acknowledging their mistake in this.

[Ed Larson]

Yes, they. Here's what they. Here's a direct quote from Hellman. Cafe Las postas. We're sorry we weren't there.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Can you actually read it in the proper mayonnaise voice?

[Ed Larson]

We are sorry we weren't there. And from now on, you can count on us. Let us take care of the repairs and make sure your sandwiches never run out of mayonnaise again.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Do you see Feel like that's passive aggressive.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, well, I mean, they're also paying for the bill.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. I mean, again, they're making the whole thing kind of funny.

[Ed Larson]

They are, which is nice and I appreciate that. I like when businesses make things a little funny, especially when they're mayonnaise based crimes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I mean, that's what I like. I think a mayonnaise base, I think a mayonnaise company is one of the most pure things that can exist. God.

[Ed Larson]

I'll tell you what though. If I'm watching someone make my sandwich and they're just like doing a bad job and I just. Wait, let me get in there.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Let me do it.

[Ed Larson]

Get the. Out of my way. Let me go. I will pay an extra $5 if I can make the sandwich.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Because my thing is the idea of a sandwich not having mayonnaise or mustard on to me is like a fucking unbelievable. Like. Who are you? Well, read this. This is actually what the restaurant posted here. This afternoon we suffered an attack where quote unquote costumer who was passing by our cafeteria asked us a couple of mayonnaise envelopes for his little ride.

[Ed Larson]

They call them envelopes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

When we told him we didn't have any, he approached the petrol station to buy a bottle of petrol, entered the premises and set us on fire. Fortunately, none of us are of our clients, including young children and elderly have suffered major damage. Only material things that are replaceable. Today we escaped, but a real disaster could have happened.

[Ed Larson]

All right. Well.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Well, yeah, obviously it's serious, Ross.

[Ed Larson]

It's very.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes, of course I know that. What? He wasn't even a customer though. He. He was walking by the place and stopped in to ask if they had some changes. No, it doesn't. No, it doesn't. It's a sandwich.

[Ed Larson]

You wanted free mayonnaise.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I would have offered a peso. When it comes down to it, it really comes. It's the fact that they didn't have it.

[Ed Larson]

I mean, this is crazy. I mean, if. See. Oh, so as they put. Customer.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Customer. Yeah, they're being, they're being. They're being passed.

[Ed Larson]

If he bought a sandwich, I. It's a little harder for me to be on their side if he bought a set because I get.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, dude, listen, tell me. Oh, no, we'll listen to what just happened. I mean, we talk about the KCU when the last time we truly. One of the biggest problems I've ever seen when we got that food delivery of the barbecue. And for some reason the barbecue place didn't put barbecue sauce in with the.

[Ed Larson]

They didn't put anybody. We ordered 150 of barbecue for me and Henry, and they put. We ordered a bunch of barbecue, and then he gave us one, like, even, like, little saucer.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, same thing.

[Ed Larson]

No ramekins.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Barbecue and barbecue.

[Ed Larson]

I was using baked beans as barbecue sauce.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Sauce. Barbecue sauce is what also makes the barbecue. It was delicious. It was good.

[Ed Larson]

It was delicious. Barbecue.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But it needs barbecue sauce.

[Ed Larson]

Extra is. It's barbecue. Barbecue.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Or if you tell me. Or tell me it's extra and I'll pay for it. Yes, tell me it's extra. Don't tell me. Not gonna include it.

[Ed Larson]

If you buy $150 worth of barbecue, little mesquite, a little bit of barbecue.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Little sauce mesquite, little spicy sauce, a little sweet one.

[Ed Larson]

Little sauce.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's it.

[Ed Larson]

Also, I went to what was supposed to be the best sandwich shop in Kansas City. Bay Boy sandwiches closed Sunday.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, dude, I know. I tried a joke.

[Ed Larson]

Close. Closed Sunday. What the. I don't know are you doing there?

[Henry Zebrowski]

God shouldn't be in Kansas City. God should be busy somewhere else. God should be in Ukraine.

[Ed Larson]

So I've got. All right, so here's my sandwich story. Like, tell me what you think about this. All right. I'm never going back to this place again. It's called. It's next to my house.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, I know.

[Ed Larson]

Anyway, actually, scratch that. I don't want people to know where I live. I'm never going back to this place.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Ever again.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Say the name, we'll beep it out it up.

[Ed Larson]

Okay. And I'm never going back there. Do you know why I went in? They have a deli counter. It's bowl of egg salad. I know you like your egg salad.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. All right.

[Ed Larson]

I say one egg salad sandwich, please. Okay. He said, we don't sell egg salad sandwiches. I said, you sell sandwiches, right? He's like, yeah. I was like, well, there's egg salad right there. He's like, yeah, you could buy a pint. I was like, huh? He's like, you could buy a pint of egg sal salad, and you could sell you some toast, and then you could make your own egg salads.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I just got angry. I literally got angry. Imagine that.

[Ed Larson]

I was just like, what? I was like, Julie. Like, Julie saw. Like, Julie, like, turned to looked at me. She was like, oh, no.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Oh, no, no.

[Ed Larson]

They. They said the wrong thing. I can see Natalie, like, doing the going, don't. Don't, please, please make the sandwich.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Just make the sandwich.

[Ed Larson]

Make the sandwich.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Okay. What if I show you one of my tits. If I show you one of my tits, will you make my husband in your sandwich? It's that easy. I know it's easy. And then she starts fighting them. I know it's easy enough for you to make the sandwich.

[Ed Larson]

They're like, no, we don't sell that. We sell toast and we sell egg salad, but we don't sell egg sandwich sandwiches.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You know? Okay, okay. I just. I do understand. All right? Up to a point.

[Ed Larson]

Going back.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I do understand. Up to a point.

[Ed Larson]

Be there again.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I'm going to add some. I'm going to try to be a devil's advocate here and try to add devil eggs. I will be the devil. Okay. I will do that. Okay. In which I could say that sometimes in more regulated places, I. This is my only way I could possibly defend this.

[Ed Larson]

It's not corporate. It's the only location I know which makes me angry.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But I'm trying to be reasonable. I'm trying to come around. If there was a problem with measuring the amount of egg cell salad.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That could go into the sandwich. I know that everybody's got like, like, like if you have a.

[Ed Larson]

Know how expensive egg salad is? You gotta make sure you don't give a drop extra.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Technically, egg salad is. Eggs are contentious food right now. But egg salad, still not. It's not filet mignon.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Right. So I feel that because egg salad, it's. It's. It's either sandwich or salad. But it's like, okay, let me put it this way in my head. Let me wrap this back in my head. All right, so a tuna melt. You're going to get a tuna melt. I imagine they're like, okay, we make X amount of tuna. Each tuna melt is two scoops, Right? Like, that's how you make.

[Ed Larson]

Usually use, like ice cream scoopers to make sure you're using the right amount.

[Henry Zebrowski]

For some reason, these guys have never once done that with egg salad.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And I can't even imagine that. This is what I'm saying, this is the only way I could defend it, is that they've never done it with egg salad. They can't even imagine how to begin to measure the egg salad onto the sandwich. Even though technically you just do the same amount that you just did for the fucking tuna san that you just made. It's the same thing. And they're right next to each other. It's two different bowls, same stuff, all the same ingredients, two different salads. I'm just saying you sell sandwiches, you sell tuna Salad. Salad and tuna salad sandwiches. Because that's the other thing too. They make tuna melts.

[Ed Larson]

Yes, they do.

[Henry Zebrowski]

So if you make gotten one from them before, and if you make a tuna melt and then you have egg salad and you have all the stuff for a tuna melt, guess what?

[Ed Larson]

You also have stuff for an egg salad sandwich. Egg salad sandwich. Actually less. Because I really just need bread and egg salad. I don't even need the lettuce. I don't even need.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Well, that's one of those controversial things about an egg salad sandwich. I feel like that everybody kind of goes back and forth.

[Ed Larson]

Well, the mayonnaise is in there, the condiment's already in there.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's it. It's salad. But I also don't treat it like a salad. Like, do I ever just sit with a bowl of egg salad? Yes.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But does every chicken salad. But if everybody else does it, I don't think anybody else eats the way I eat it. I eat it with a spoon.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I make my own. And we already watch a car.

[Ed Larson]

Carbs.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes. And also.

[Ed Larson]

But not the cholesterol.

[Henry Zebrowski]

None of it. And then I also do my deconstructed egg salad where I. I eat the. I have a hard boiled egg and I dip it into the mayonnaise and I dip it into the mustard and I eat it like that. I make the excel of my mouth.

[Ed Larson]

Wow. I can't wait to come out to a bunch of sparklers at your funeral.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They're gonna be actually happy at mine. They're gonna be actually happy at my mind. But yeah, I am one of the great whites. One of the big ones, I gotta say. Truly though, I can't believe how upset I just was.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, no, that. But it's completely insane.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Right, well, that is. Then I'm. We're becoming. That's when you were in a Larry David like scenario.

[Ed Larson]

But yeah, no, but that. I went. I mean, I turned into a Karen.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Of course.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Because it's. It's like food red tape.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. So I. I know this man was wrong drunk.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes. The man who said fire to the restaurant.

[Ed Larson]

The rage is all I'm saying.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Did you do it? Did you buy the toast and the egg salad?

[Ed Larson]

No, I'm never going back. I. I walked out screaming. I was like, I'm never coming. But you won't make a sandwich for me. I'm never coming back here. I. I live down the street.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Ed is correct. Ed is correct. I.

[Ed Larson]

You've literally lost a thousand dollars this year.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You literally.

[Ed Larson]

That's what you did?

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yep.

[Ed Larson]

That's what you did.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I'm with you. I stand on your side and I'm about to get a bottle of petrol. I didn't know we could do that. Yeah, I want to just buy a 20 ounce of petrol. Just shoot it down there, man. That sounds amazing. Let's go get him. I've never set fire to anything with you. Did you know that your money could grow on its own? I did not know. It's not magic. It's called compounding interest. That's when your money makes more money and then that money makes even more money. Acorns makes it easy to give your money a chance to grow. My money is my child. Acorns is the financial wellness app that helps you invest for your future, save for tomorrow and spend smarter today. Oh no, my child is sick. I need to figure out how to make it bigger.

[Ed Larson]

Thanks Acorns.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Acorns makes it easy to start doing more with your money. I want to go to the supermarket with my money. I want to go on a cruise with my money. You could do it with Acorns. Acorns. And it's all in one easy to use app. Sign up now and Acorns will boost your account with a five dollar bonus. Investment. Join over the 14 million all time customers who have already saved invested over 25 billion dollars with Acorns. Head to acorns.com left or download the Acorns app to get started. Paid non client endorsement compensation provides incentive deposit really promote Acorns Tier 2 compensation provided investing involves risk. Acorns Advisors LLC, an SEC registered investment advisor. View important [e-mail] left you ever picked a vacation spot based in where you don't need a phrase book? Yeah, it's called My home. With Babel, the language barrier no longer has to hold you back. Start speaking a new language with confidence. Thanks to Babel's conversation based technique that quickly teaches you to use useful words and phrases about the things you actually talk about in the real world. Like guillotines. There's over a dozen languages available to learn at your own pace so you can achieve your goals with material tailored to your individual proficiency level, interest and time availability. You ever been with this guy? He's going where's your daughter? Where's your wife? Where's your daughter? Where's your wife? And you're like sir, please. No, please leave me alone. I think with Don. And you're like whoa, I think I know that Spanish. Thanks Babel. Because you learned it because of Babel. Go check it out. It's easy to do. It's a. It's on your computer. It's on your phone. It's not like you got to go some other place. It's right there in front of you. You can just go get it better, because if you don't, I'm coming for you. Learn another language. Babel is gifting our listeners 55 off [e-mail] left get up to 55% [e-mail] left that's spelled B A, B, B E L.com left babel.com left rules and restrictions may apply. Simply safe. They don't call it simply not safe. It's called simply safe. Most people think home security is just an alarm that goes off after a break and scaring the intruder off and getting a neighbor's attention if you're lucky. But that's a reactive approach. No, I'm not proactive. I'm a proactive homeowner. I neutralize criminals before they come to my mind.

[Ed Larson]

Home.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And that's why you should trust Simplisafe. Their system is designed to be proactive, not reactive. Yep, we're shooting gum goop. Adam, it's net gun time. They use smart AI powered cameras to identify threats lurking outside your home. Is that threat? Oh, it's a skunk threat. No, it's a pre threat. That skunk's gonna learn how to use a gun. They access two way audio to confront the person. They go, hey there, Mr. Man. Hey there, Mr. Buster Brown. You get out of there. It's not your course.

[Ed Larson]

Corvette.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Right? And then it triggers sirens and spotlights to scare them off. And they go, wee wee.

[Ed Larson]

Wow.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And the guys are like, oh. Oh, no. That house is talking to me. That house is talking to me.

[Ed Larson]

All right.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's why I love Simplisafe. They make my house talk to criminals so that I don't have to do it. That's the hardest part being in this business is all the criminals I have to converse with on a daily basis in show business. What's nice about simply safe? They keep my life away from the criminals. And our podcasts, we use Simplisafe here at the studio. And I gotta say, their customer service is unmatched. Thanks, SimpliSafe. Visit SimpliSafe.com LPOTL to claim 50% off a new system. That's SimpliSafe.comLPOTL there's no safe like Simplisafe. All right, so what do we got here? What do we have any other stories?

[Ed Larson]

Oh. Oklahoma tiger handler fatally mauled during show. Ryan Easley with ties to Joe Exotic likely died instantly at Growler Pines.

[Henry Zebrowski]

He also said Joe Exotic was saying a whole thing be like, people have been making too much hay on me. People be having too much fun with me. And I need to stop by saying, I'm joking. Yeah, it's really funny. Like, he's really been. He's upset about this one.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

After he. After he ratted his own husband out to get him deported.

[Ed Larson]

It's a private zoo next to the. Next to the Texas border. A tiger he'd raised since it was a cub turn on him, delivering fatal bites to his neck and shoulder.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Tigers don't know. Dogs don't know. They are animals. They don't know. They only know their instincts.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. The. The attack happened in front of Easley's wife and daughter while the wife was managing the to move the tiger to another enclosure. After the incident, Easley was pronounced dead at the scene. Likely died instantly.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They say, well, honestly, that's a. A relief.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. They said it was a love bite in the wrong spot.

[Henry Zebrowski]

No, that's not.

[Ed Larson]

That's the problem.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You shouldn't be experiencing love bites from giant jungle cats.

[Ed Larson]

Leave them alone.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They should be in the zoo. They should be the real zoo.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

These guys are honestly, you know, again, it just shows where it's humans. We spent so long in the jungles avoiding these animals. We spent so long running and trying to out think them and outwit these predators so far that we created church. Right?

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Like, that's how far we went. And then it's just weird when guys are just like, nah, hang out with it. Yeah, I want it in my backyard. I don't need to be an expert. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Easley and his wife opened Growler Pines in Hugo in 2021. They were offering. They usually had a lot of retired circus tigers because they come from circus backgrounds. And they planned to settle in a city known for its circus heritage.

[Henry Zebrowski]

All of this is bad news. All of this is dumb and bad.

[Ed Larson]

You got to go to your a. If you're going to a zoo. First of all, every roadside zoo. Right in its tush, of course. And go to make. Just take two seconds. Two seconds in Google if it's a approved. I'm so sick of this. It's very easy to do otherwise. You're committing a crime too, in my opinion.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Hey, you know, it's one of those where I. I don't even like legit zoos. So I'm always scared. I'm. I feel bad for the animals.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Well, if you. I like zoos, but I hate these zoos.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, I get it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. So please, just a little. The tiniest bit of research and.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Or if not, you might get a couple of love bites in the wrong.

[Ed Larson]

Place yourself, you know? And also, there was problems at a. At an animal shelter this weekend.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Dude, this is a. I am having a hard time slightly parsing this stick out, but it's pretty interesting. So this was a US Animal shelter. The FBI, apparently, Billings, Montana, apparently they've been doing this thing where they rent out their. Their cremation urn, which.

[Ed Larson]

I can't believe that's real.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's very. I had no idea. I guess it, like, sort of makes sense in a way. Like, you have this facility.

[Ed Larson]

The FBI get your own crematorium.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I had no idea why it works. I don't know why it's like this. If someone can answer me. Side stories. LPOTL gmail.com. but the FBI, like, they could build one, I think. I don't know. I don't know how it works. So apparently they use this animal crematorium to burn two pounds of seized methamphetamine.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And then something went wrong in the burn basket that sent all the meth smoke into where all the animals and all the workers were at the shelter. And 15 people, 14 staff members were.

[Ed Larson]

Went to the hospital.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They all got hit. It was like 75 cats and dogs were hit with a cloud of meth smoke.

[Ed Larson]

So basically, these. These workers and these animals are high on meth. And the workers have to. To be like, okay, I'm high on meth. I'm all fucked up. I have to save these animals. And these animals are also high on meth. Imagine the fucking chaos.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Actually, you know what was really interesting is it was chaos at first. It was chaos at first. Everybody's all gacked out. Never had that before. But then between the workers and the animals, they cleaned and painted that whole beginning in front of the structure. It was amazing. They did the lawn work. They built a catapult. That was crazy. The dogs built a catapult. The cats built a dog a pult. And they were just having fun, shooting each other back and forth the fucking. There was one guy just literally doing his skip it for hours. He kept saying, skip it, Skip it. You didn't have a skip it.

[Ed Larson]

The person who runs the fucking facility says they didn't even know they were doing it. They said I could firmly and confidently Say, as the executive director, I did not know that they were disposing of extremely dangerous narcotics on site.

[Henry Zebrowski]

If anybody could answer me, I would love to know how the hell this works out. I want to know, like, do they rent it? Do they just use. Like, is it because they don't. I mean, how does the FBI not have their drug? Their own. Well, I'll put it this way. I know that every FBI has like, a state bureau, right? So the FBI will have something like this. Billings, Montana.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Like, they'll have like.

[Ed Larson]

We know there's no space in Montana. We know there's nothing. There's nowhere. There's no space.

[Henry Zebrowski]

The crush of people of Montana is crazy. There is almost no available real estate.

[Ed Larson]

Less than a person a mile.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But it feels like maybe a local group used it. Maybe that's what it is. I don't know.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, my God. It's just like, can you fuck up any more FBI?

[Henry Zebrowski]

No. Good God. Well, it really seems when it all comes together, when you have a YouTube Uber running a police, I'd say, would you call it an entire national police investigative universe? It seems there might be some issues in there. So when you have that Google AI'd running this shit, you'd be surprised when more of these things don't start happening.

[Ed Larson]

So we'll see. Oh, layaway Patel.

[Henry Zebrowski]

God, that was. Someone said that. That was a really good one. That was a really, really good one. All right, so I think we're about ready to do some letters.

[Ed Larson]

All right.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Listener letters.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, do we have this new Stinger, Rob?

[Henry Zebrowski]

We do, actually. We do. This one is from Tony in the band Royal Dog. Yeah, yeah.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You listen. It's my turn.

[Ed Larson]

Listen to emails. Yeah, that's awesome. That's pretty cool.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's good and simple.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, I like that one. Really good one. Royal Doll.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Rol do.

[Henry Zebrowski]

First of all, a lot of people said that dodos were not a. Is dumb.

[Ed Larson]

Whatever.

[Henry Zebrowski]

We don't know. We don't know. But this mostly was just because they.

[Ed Larson]

Weren'T the same scientists that signed the Epstein birthday book.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Get you tell me. I say they saying apparently that doos were just. They had no natural predators where they were. And when we showed up, they just didn't know what we were. And that's why we ate all of them. Yeah, but again, Dodo read a book, look at a map.

[Ed Larson]

It is a shame that we killed all of them. I'm just trying to make a joke about how I wanted to eat one.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But also know for a fact that. That company that's doing the. The thing with the Macedon. Yeah. And the saber tooth tiger. It's all a grift. It's all scam. No one's doing it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. They're not going to be able to do it.

[Henry Zebrowski]

No, they're. It's not that they won't be able to do it. It's just that they're not doing it. They're just taking your money.

[Ed Larson]

I wish they had a bunch of, like, if they did, like, an old pig, you know, they did an old pig and they call the place, like, Jurassic Pork.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's cute.

[Ed Larson]

Yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

See, I f. That's fine. That's cute. I. But I would say, honestly, I would actually do want a more ancient human ancestor. Like, like one of those like, like old monkey versions.

[Ed Larson]

So if they, like. What if they made, like, a Neanderthal.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, Neanderthal.

[Ed Larson]

Could we eat it?

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. If you kill it.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They can't throw anything. That's what's interesting about Neanderthals.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

They couldn't throw.

[Ed Larson]

They can't throw.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Nope. They didn't have over the shoulder motion.

[Ed Larson]

Oh.

[Henry Zebrowski]

It was one of the things that we had over the. Over them.

[Ed Larson]

Oh.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And also our ability to take notes, literally, like, that we would fight the Neanderthals and then the Neanderthals would originally beat a lot of the original Homo sapien tribes. We'd lose to them quite a bit. But when Neanderthals couldn't do that, we could do. Is that we figured out how to change text. So we would. They would only ever fight one way or do things one way, and then we'd show up one way, and if it didn't work, we'd show up and do it in another way. We'd attack them in a different way and they would.

[Ed Larson]

They're like the south, sort of, but south is.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yes. Yes. You would say they might be a bit of a throwback.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah. Yeah. Wow.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Handsome guy.

[Ed Larson]

All right. I won't eat him.

[Henry Zebrowski]

All right. Spooky. Oh, couple things. Right before we even begin the beginning, in the middle of the segment, while we're doing this, next week begins 31 for 31.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

So we're going to announce our 31 for 31 next week. It's going to come out on October 1st. Our list of episodes. So we're list of new movies that we're going to watch, and then we'll do, like, a big, like, thing in the middle of that. We're also going to be doing listener podcast pasta Again this year.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But we just haven't set that up yet. But know that that is October. Know that because of the very long form subject, last podcast in the left is going to be doing. We are not going to be on last podcast going to be getting all that spooky for spooky season. But the spooky is coming over here. So Side Stories is going to be handling as much of the spooky as we can.

[Ed Larson]

That's a good idea. Yeah, so we seen that. That seems to happen to us a lot. We're like, we did Andrew Cunanan during October.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's right. We did do Andrew Kanan. Was that last year?

[Ed Larson]

Two years ago. Wow.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I love that. Honestly, I love that series, though.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah, it was a great series, but not spooky. All right, here we go.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Back in early 2017, me and my wife had decided to move back into our hometown in West Michigan. After some time in the Navy, we moved into one of the oldest homes in town, which was made in the late 1800s. I remember when we first bought it making funny comments that the Michigan basement had to be a meth lab or had to have satanic cults just to fuck with my wife and friends. We found out though, when we bought it, there was only two families had owned it prior to us. After about a year after my daughter was born and shortly after my cousin had moved in with us. My wife had previously been in a paranormal investigation group in Rochester, New York, York. Her, me and my cousin were attuned to anything weird, but also skeptical. It wasn't until around 2019 when weird started to truly happen. I'd noticed birthday balloons had moved into different rooms over arches in the ceiling overnight when no fans were on. While me and my cousin were talking in my daughter's room, the fan just randomly turned off. We just have each other, like look at each other with kind of spooked faces. While eating dinner with my wife and daughter, my wife watched the remote on the couch arm just slowly slide off. And I all I saw was her eyes widened as she said the remote was moved up the couch. It didn't slide. Days after that, I was taking a shit with the door open and the PAM spray on the stove after a meal had been thrown off from my view. I finished and went to my wife and cousin in the living room asking if the PAM had been in the spot where that could happen. And they said it was probably one of the cats knocking it off. As my cat said that one cat jumped up from the bay window meowing at me as the second was still sleeping in the window. We all just looked at each other without explanation. We always joked that the house looked haunted since we bought it, but now it started feeling like it. So after all this, I looked into we had bought the house from and where who had previously owned it. Since it only had two previous owners, we found out that the previous owner had recently passed away months before. Right around when weird shit started happening. Mid 2020, we moved to a different house in the same town. My extremely conservative stepsister and her husband bought our house. So even if weird shit is happening, happening, I'm sure they'll never admit it. That's the truth.

[Ed Larson]

That's wrong.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, that is the problem. All right, well, that's my letter.

[Ed Larson]

Yes. Yeah. Is your house haunted yet? How's your ghost, by the way? I. Jason, I still have it. I.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You know what's funny is that the other day, one thing in the letter that Jason wrote. First of all, oh, big announcement. I'll do this too. Beyond the Veil commentary is going to be coming up. Great Christmas.

[Ed Larson]

Nice.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Just so you know, we're gonna be doing a whole thing. We're filming it now. It's gonna be coming up for Christmas. So it's all. You're gonna get it all out. And one of the things that happened during beyond the Veil was that I received a ghost in a box. And Jason, who was the ghost, said in a letter, like, basically describing who Jason. Basically saying that he would. He was interested in heavy metal, horror movies, booze and drugs.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

In his life. Weed. And so what I did was I gave him a shot of bourbon. I gave him a big old joint in his little thing. I legitimately, I put a little piece of horror merch inside from one of the stickers I have. Oh, it's like some, something from Reanimator.

[Ed Larson]

We should get him some fentanyl.

[Henry Zebrowski]

He loved fentanyl. He's so sad.

[Ed Larson]

Probably how he got there.

[Henry Zebrowski]

So sad to miss it. Car crash. Oh, and he said that but was interesting, is that they said there would be two ways that he would mess with me. One was with moving objects and one was with fire.

[Ed Larson]

Okay.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And this did happen.

[Ed Larson]

Get a tiny fire.

[Henry Zebrowski]

No, I was grilling and I, I, I find this interesting. This is probably the closest to little me, but who knows anymore? So I, I barely talk about the stuff because everybody always boo me. But I think this is one of those things that was interesting.

[Ed Larson]

Ghost.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But. So I went in and I was cooking in the middle of the day. And I went to Jason and I acknowledged Jason. Like, I'll do that. As I'm walking through the house, I go, hey, bud. I acknowledge him. I was grilling, and I came back to the grill and opened up and I was like, what's going on? Like, the temperature had really dropped on the grill, and I didn't notice the grill. Grill dials. I preheated it. I turned it all up to preheat it, and I turned it all on.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

And then I came out and all of the grill dials were shut off.

[Ed Larson]

Whoa.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That was really weird. And that was like one of those things that was like, that happened to me recently. It set a little chill up my spine. But I'm just.

[Ed Larson]

Natalie, if she did it.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah, no, she was sitting outside.

[Ed Larson]

Oh, really?

[Henry Zebrowski]

Dude, that was. Was really up. Natalie was outside having a glass of wine, and I literally walked past, asked her, and then I was like, did you with the grill? I didn't tell her, but I asked her. I was like, did you with the grill? Did, like, did you change the girl? She was like, no, I'm not gonna. You know, I don't.

[Ed Larson]

How stoned were you?

[Henry Zebrowski]

Not that. Not enough food was on the grill. Yeah.

[Ed Larson]

No, it's true. Yeah. If anything, you turn it up. Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Or like, I meter it. Right. Like, if I'm doing chicken.

[Ed Larson]

Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

I'll take it down. You know, like, that's like. You know, especially if I'm doing a steak. You start as hot as you can get it, and then I take it down.

[Ed Larson]

Down.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Yeah. Just sort of let it cool a little bit. Let a little. Kind of.

[Ed Larson]

God. Yeah.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Technically, I had burgers the other day that I sort of ruined. I made them too much, but it was fine.

[Ed Larson]

What are you gonna do on October 12th? I'm coming to Madison, Wisconsin, without Henry, Without Marcus. I am coming to comedy on State with Logan Metz of the Promise of the Real. Get your [e-mail] I can't to wait. Wait. I'm doing my full hour of comedy. Logan's going to be on stage with me. He's got a new album he's making. There's some bad. He's got like, a whole, like, Randy Newman, Leon Russell thing going on right now. It's real good. I saw it out here and, like, I can't. Like, I'm literally doing this show so I can hear the music again because the album doesn't exist. It's so good. That's awesome. Come check it out. And then also November 16th, I'm going to be in San Diego, Mic Drop Comedy. I'm doing an hour there, but I'm bringing Amber Nelson, I'm bringing Ashley Brook Roberts and and the wonderful Julie Rosing. We're all going to be performing together at Mic Drop Comedy. Both of these shows are on Sundays, so please skip football and come see me perform in Madison, Wisconsin. San Diego. We have more dates coming. Henry and I got a Las Vegas date coming.

[Henry Zebrowski]

We do side stories. Vegas is coming, man.

[Ed Larson]

By next week it'll be released and you'll let you'll know what it is. Can't wait. And I can't wait for all this. Stay tuned at any time.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Love every day. Known for a fact we're going to Vegas and I can't wait. I'm going to goddamn Vegas. Right? I'm going go down to Vegas. I'm going love being in Vegas. I'm going to drink a bunch of I'm going to drink a lot. I'm going to drink a lot. I'm going yell a lot. I'm going to eat a lot. All right. And you can watch me yell and eat. We can all laugh if you join us watching us live in Las Vegas, Nevada. S city, baby. Yeah. And go to patreon.com left to watch all the stuff. By the way, give us money if you could go to LP on the left for all of our social media, all the horeshit go to UFO movie to give my money. Give me money directly. Yes, that'd be nice.

[Ed Larson]

Go follow us on Tik Tok and let the idf know who your favorite comedians are if you could.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Truly that would be a big boost for us. Also again, if anybody could hit up the Riyadh.

[Ed Larson]

Oh yes.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Comedy festival booker.

[Ed Larson]

Oh yeah. And we had a great interview with Harold Check actor and Eric Powell about Dr.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Worthless, the guy that put the, the content. They wrote a book about the comic book. Yeah, he wrote a, they wrote a comic novel. Thank you.

[Ed Larson]

And I read it. I'm reading now.

[Henry Zebrowski]

He's reading now.

[Ed Larson]

You believe that?

[Henry Zebrowski]

But it's about the guy that censored comic books in the 50s. But he also like had a relationship with Ed Gein.

[Ed Larson]

It's a great Dr. Wortham. It's a really good book. Also, like, it's very, he, it shows how some someone can have an amazing legacy and then just ruin it doing something stupid.

[Henry Zebrowski]

But he was also, he was an interesting guy.

[Ed Larson]

No, I, I, it's, it's weird because I like liked him and then at the very end you see him just snap and become a lunatic.

[Henry Zebrowski]

That's what happens.

[Ed Larson]

And so what are you gonna do either way? Out the book, check out the interview, it's available on YouTube. And y' all be good to yourselves.

[Henry Zebrowski]

You just live long enough to see yourself become a villain, just to be careful. That's why. Gotta go early At Designer Shoe Warehouse we believe that shoes are an important part of, well, everything.

[Ed Larson]

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[Narrator/Announcer]

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[Henry Zebrowski]

From building pillow forts to building a.

[Narrator/Announcer]

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[Henry Zebrowski]

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[Narrator/Announcer]

At your DSW store or dsw.com hey.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Listeners, Marcus, Edd and Henry here. A little bit of an announcement.

[Ed Larson]

You loving all the episodes of Last Podcast on the Left lately? Well listen now you can get even more from us.

[Henry Zebrowski]

Squeeze it out of us. If you want to hear new episodes ad free and unlock access to last podcast the left seven days early. Subscribe to Sirius XM podcast plus on Apple Podcasts or visit siriusxm.compodcast plus to start your free trial today. Do it.