Last Podcast On The Left – Side Stories: Shart Tank
Date: March 4, 2026
Hosts: Henry Zebrowski & Eddie (Ed) Larson
Episode Overview
In this wild, irreverent Side Stories episode titled "Shart Tank," Henry Zebrowski and Ed Larson return from a memorable trip to Austin, Texas, and catch listeners up on a slew of dark, bizarre, and headline-grabbing stories. This week's journey moves from personal and bodily mishaps, the recent Austin mass shooting, and the city’s vibe, to updates on the cartel situation in Mexico, shocking true crime involving children, and a rundown on the Jeffrey Epstein case depositions with the Clintons. Table-set with their signature blend of black comedy, social commentary, and bodily function banter, the hosts also react to the arrest of the Squatty Potty inventor, listener letters, and more kitchen horror stories.
Segment Breakdown & Key Insights
1. Austin Recap & Bodily Mishaps
- [01:13–03:53]
- Henry opens with a hilarious, graphic story about scratching his butthole after an overindulgent meal in Austin.
- Both share tips about dealing with "fat man rash" and chafed butts (cortisone, showers, Neosporin on cotton pads).
- Notable Quote:
Henry: “As I was sitting in this chair I felt a sharp pain for my butthole because we had such a great meal. ... I tried to clean out my hole.” [01:44]
Ed: “I like a little burn, to be honest.” [03:38]
2. Austin Mass Shooting & Local Tensions
- [04:08–15:20]
- The hosts discuss the mood whiplash after a great show at the Paramount Theatre → hours later, a terror attack on 6th Street.
- Details include: location (Buford’s Backyard Beer Garden, West 6th), suspect profile (Senegalese origin, shirt reading “Property of Allah”), and possible links to US-Iran tensions.
- Commentary on the lack of immediate police/security response, conspiracy skepticism, and differences in security between US and Europe.
- Notable Quote:
Henry: “The idea that you had a 'terror cell attack' and then we’re just gonna roll on like nothing’s happened... just never.” [11:18]
Ed: “Waymo has blood on their hands, officially.” [14:04]
3. Waymo Self-Driving Cars Chaos
- [12:31–15:59]
- New problem in Austin: Waymo self-driving cars blocking ambulances, generally gumming up the works, and frightening locals.
- Fan stories of cars malfunctioning near show venues, and discussion about how far we are from viable driverless tech.
- Notable Quote:
Henry: “Austin, you’re not LA yet! … The Waymo thing is a bit out of control.” [13:17]
Ed: “This is a disaster.” [13:59]
4. Mexico Cartel Violence Update
- [19:31–24:14]
- Reading a listener email providing an insider’s perspective from Nayarit, Mexico:
- Confirms it's not a civil war, but a cartel power vacuum following El Mencho’s death.
- Government and cartel collusion, the economy’s dependence on drug flow, and the outsize role of American anti-cartel forces.
- Cartel humor cited: a body in a pot of pozole ingredients.
- Reflection on manipulative news reporting and American perceptions.
- Notable Quote:
Henry (reading): “Even the cartels have a sense of humor… put in a big pot along with all the ingredients to make pozole.” [21:47]
- Reading a listener email providing an insider’s perspective from Nayarit, Mexico:
5. Child Crime: 11-Year-Old Tried as Adult
- [25:44–32:35]
- An 11-year-old faces adult charges after killing his adoptive father over a Nintendo Switch dispute.
- Detailed account: premeditated gun retrieval and murder, discussion about agency, mental health, and the age of criminal responsibility.
- Both hosts express empathy but debate what is just in handling children who commit such calculated violence.
- Notable Quote:
Henry: “He is… Michael Myers, kind of.” [31:49]
Ed: “I just think an 11-year-old child… doesn’t understand the concept of death.” [29:25]
6. Epstein Deposition Update: The Clintons in the Hot Seat
- [33:30–43:36]
- Recap of untelevised depositions with Hillary and Bill Clinton about Epstein, with lively descriptions of Hillary’s dominance in the room and Bill’s ambiguous admissions.
- Both hosts clarify their cynicism about any justice actually happening; discuss media spectacle versus substantive investigations.
- Notable Quote:
Henry: “She (Hillary) works the room like Sharon Stone in Casino.” [34:43]
Ed: “Bill Clinton’s a rapist… but not on that island.” [36:38]
7. Squatty Potty Inventor Arrested for CSAM
- [46:28–51:07]
- Shock (but not surprise) at the arrest of Squatty Potty inventor Robert “Bobby” Edwards for possessing and sharing child sexual abuse materials.
- Exposes dark subcultures using platforms like Zoom for illicit material, and riffs on how language (“squatty,” “shart tank”) can sour a reputation.
- Both riff on the gross-out details of the story and product.
- Notable Quote:
Henry: “It’s the word ‘squatty’... why don’t you pop a squatty over here in my mouth, little boy.” [46:43]
8. Listener Letters: Kitchen Horror Stories
- [54:32–61:48]
- Olive Garden Deep Fryer Suicide Attempt:
- PCP-fueled chef dunking his head in fryer oil, screaming “I’m cool, bro” — both hosts astounded at the chaos in restaurant kitchens.
- [55:07]
- San Antonio Gun Violence:
- Host’s reaction to a listener’s account of a shooting between staff, with the restaurant reopening for brunch the next day.
- [58:11]
- Epileptic Dishwasher Accident:
- A young employee’s epilepsy led to her arms being submerged in hot oil and triggered a career change.
- [59:17]
- Both hosts share their own injury stories and reinforce the tough reality of kitchen work, sliding into their humbler present as “prostitutes, but for jokes.” [62:00]
- Olive Garden Deep Fryer Suicide Attempt:
9. Tour Dates and Show Announcements
- [63:07–64:58]
- Ed and Henry rattle off upcoming tour dates, fan appreciation, and reminders of their streaming and Patreon perks.
- Interspersed with bits about “salmon jerky,” sounding off on fan food gifts, and quick health updates on Bruce Campbell.
Memorable Quotes & Moments
- “Waymo has blood on their hands, officially.” – Ed Larson [14:04]
- “I've seen cats take chances, and you don’t want to take a chance with a Waymo.” – Henry Zebrowski [14:31]
- “He is… Michael Myers, kind of.” – Henry Zebrowski [31:49]
- “She works the room like Sharon Stone in Casino.” – Ed Larson on Hillary Clinton [34:43]
- “It’s the word squatty… why don’t you pop a squatty over here in my mouth, little boy.” – Henry Zebrowski [46:43]
- “I’m cool, bro. I’m cool, bro.” – Olive Garden chef during the fryer incident [55:07]
- “We live to entertain you. We go around the world entertaining. We want to entertain you.” – Henry, on their motivation [62:09]
Timestamps for Major Segments
- Austin Trip & Butthole Story: [01:13–03:53]
- Austin Mass Shooting/Terror Attack: [04:08–15:20]
- Waymo Chaos: [12:31–15:59]
- Cartel/Mexico Discussion: [19:53–24:14]
- 11-Year-Old Tried as Adult: [26:01–32:35]
- Clintons & Epstein Deposition: [33:30–43:36]
- Squatty Potty Inventor Arrested: [46:28–51:07]
- Listener Letters/Kitchen Stories: [54:32–61:48]
- Tour Dates/Outro Banter: [63:07–64:58]
Tone & Style
Staying true to their brand, Henry and Ed juggle irreverent toilet humor, horror, and macabre news with an undercurrent of real skepticism, world-weariness, and concern. Gut-churning or tragic news is always bookended by gallows humor or a tale from their own past, keeping the listener laughing even as they process darkness. Rapid-fire anecdotes, banter, and kinetic sarcasm make for a dense, energetic episode that doesn’t let up.
Summary Takeaway:
This Side Stories packs the usual punch: bloody headlines, scathing takes on American society and law, grim true crime, stories from Hell’s kitchen, and riffs on bodily pain—all delivered through a fart joke and a smirk. If you missed this one, you’ll come away more knowledgeable, more shocked, and definitely more entertained—if slightly more afraid of deep fryers, self-driving cars, and anyone named “Bobby” selling bathroom equipment.