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This is Laugh with Me, a podcast with Jeremy. Jo. Welcome to episode 111. Johnny, that's, that's pretty good, don't you say? I say that's pretty good. Stack that up there with one of the good things that happened today. I just. Sometimes when you get a couple wins, you want to share them with the people, okay. Because it's just, it's no fun to score a win and then nobody knows about it. Especially when it's wins like this. Okay? Not episode 111. I mean, that's exciting for Johnny, that. Johnny, good job, buddy. You were here for what, a hundred of those? Close to 100, right? We're not celebrating your 100 yet. Either way, Johnny, we're at 111. Congratulations. Not today. Today I, you know, rolled up to the old hospital as one does, having, having some blood taken, having, having it checked out a little bit. See how the iron's sitting and you might be saying, man, Jo sounds like he's got that pep in his step. He must be full of iron. He must be rocking and rolling right now. That new med meds he's on working. No, not necessarily. See, what happened is, is I, I was, I went to have it checked because I am in fact probably pretty low and all the need things to keep going. But as I'm at the desk, you know, talking to the, the, I don't even know what the receptionist, whoever it is doing the check in, you know, anymore to verify who you are, they need your name, they need your birthday. Sometimes they need your home address. But in this particular situation, she asked for my birthday. So I give her my birthday and she loudly goes, no way. And I thought, hey, we have the same birthday or something. And I'm like, well, yeah, your birthday's on in June. And she's like, no, there is no way that you were that old. I'm like, what are you talking about? And she's like, you do not look like you were that old. And I'm like, hey, I'm gonna take the swim because I don't get that very often anymore. I do, I do believe My age is, in fact, catching up to me. And I don't get that. I used to get that a lot, okay. Especially in my 30s. My 30s, I got it a lot. Where people thought I was in my 20s or sometimes even younger, you know, getting ID left and right, just boom, boom, boom. But, you know, anymore, you know, I don't really get, you know, much of that at all. Got it today, though. Take that as a win. Always take that as a win. I. They. That's what they said, like with having red hair. They. They always said when I was younger. They're like, you're gonna. You're gonna get that a lot when you're older. People are gonna say, oh, you look so young. It's just. It's in the jeans. Something about the redheaded jeans. I don't know. I don't know if that's the case or not. But whatever else I've got going on, I know is helping speed everything up to catch up. So we are, in fact, getting there. I don't. Maybe it's the beard. I don't know. You know, this is gonna be a warm winter for your boy. I started growing out my facial hair. Gotta. I got a beard going. Never been more warm outside. And it's cold. Okay. It's like 10, 10 degrees or less in the mornings. I think this afternoon it was maybe in the 20s. But I'll tell you what, my face, warm. So first winter ever, I got the beard going and I'm. I'm wondering, should I have been doing this all along? I don't know. I take that as a win. It could be. It could very well be the beard covering up my old man face. I think that's what it was because I don't have the gray or the white or whatever. Maybe today, because I don't always. Maybe today I had that life in my eyes and she was just like, man, that guy's young. And then, you know, I spit out my age and it verified in the computer. And she's like, no way we're gonna give credit to the beard on this one. But as life does, whenever you've got some. Some monster wins like this, it tends to humble you. And that's what happened. Not long after that is I. I'm waiting for tires. See, I had an appointment today, 1:30, to get all new tires on my car. My car desperately need tires. One blue. I talked about a couple weeks ago, one blue. So I'm getting all these new tires, 1:30 appointment today. But apparently not all the tires Were delivered. I, you know, they said four tires. Two of them have been delivered. Then there was some talk of maybe we had three. So maybe they had a rando around, I don't know. But either way, we're waiting on two tires to be delivered for sure. And did you. Did you know tires, they don't come rolling in on a truck, right? They get like delivered FedEx or something. @ least at this place they did because they're waiting on a FedEx delivery. Thought that was random. You think they would just get like a truck that rolls up and just drops off all their tires for them for the week or something a couple times a week? I don't know. But yeah, so. So anyways, I'm waiting because they. They were like, age FedEx truck. I'm waiting on FedEx here any minute. Any minute. Spoiler. I still don't have my tires. But as I'm waiting, I'm like, oh, cool, I'll go walk around like Target or something, you know. So I'm walking around Target and here's where life humbles you. I'm in the back of the store having the time of my life just looking at stuff. Just looking at stuff. And I had this instant urge that I was going to shit myself. And this is not something that always happens. I think that's the. One of the biggest misconceptions with somebody who has like Crohn's disease or colitis is that you're just constantly yourself. This is. That's not true at all. Now with that being said, does it. Do you have that urge? Do you feel like instant, immediate, like it's going down sometimes? Yes. And I know some people have a far worse than me, so I am very thankful for that. I'm going to continue to fight the good fight and hope that I could get into remission and not have to deal with it to it deeper. Deeper into the Crohn's world. But thing is, sometimes, yes, the urge hits and it's not like, oh, I'm. I'm gonna hold it until I. No, it's like I was dodging people in aisles because I was. It was like one of those things where every step you take, like a fart, like it just. They just start flying out. And I was at a point where I knew if I didn't get to the bathroom now, it was going to be worse than these little farts. So it was like I didn't want to be embarrassed by ripping farts by all these people. But then at the same time, it would be worse. It could get far worse. So what did I do, Johnny? I went straight up to the bathroom. But here's what I didn't anticipate. There was a guy in the back of the store with these two kids in his cart. He's just. He's on his phone, he's ranting, raving to his girl that he's having to keep the kids, you know, entertained while she's doing whatever she's doing. And so I. I was. I just thought it was funny. I'm like, oh, this guy is. Poor guy, he's dealing with his kids. And then I get up to the front because I'm going to shit myself. And who is rolling into the bathroom with all his kids? That guy. So now I'm coming in behind him with urgency. He goes into the last available stall. So part of me is like, well, that sucks, because I don't know if I'm gonna be able to, like, wait this one out. But then the other part of me is like, I may have dodged a bullet because if I had gotten in there right before him and I'm in there and then. Then I have to listen to him, you know, ranting and raving in the echoes of the restroom at Target that he can't use the. I don't even know who had to go, was it him? Was the kids? I don't care. I didn't stick around to find out. But what I do know is I had. I had to keep moving. So I did a lap around the front end there of the store, the registers. Us in the business, us in the industry, grocery industry, we call the. That front end there with the rich. We call it the front end. I don't know what the new normies call it, but those of us in the business, we call it the front end. I did. I did a quick lap around the registers there on the front end. And then I still didn't see anybody coming out of the bathroom. So then I do another lap, but this time I went. I went over by the baseball cards because they're supposed to be this new, you know, not new series, but this series that I really enjoy. Supposed to be coming out here this week for 20, 25. And I was like, ah, it could be Target, maybe have. Have the new. Have the new packs. But no, they did not. So I roll back over and I see the guy with his kids putting their coats on. So they are out of the restroom now. So I roll in there, oddly enough, whole place empty. I had the whole place to myself, that was nice. But as soon as I close the stall door, then somebody comes into the. To. To the stall and. But the. To the urinal. But the urinals, right? I took the first stall hand up. I. I shouldn't have done that. I should have taken the one in the back or something. I don't want to be a jerk and take the handicap one, which happened to be in the back, which I find interesting, because why would the handicap stall be the last stall, whereas in the parking lot, it's always got to be one of them front stalls? And how close are we to, you know, having to have some kind of, like, ID or something to be able to use those handicap stalls, much like the parking? I'm not saying that we should. I'm just speaking out loud. Just thinking now. Something's never even occurred to me until just right this moment. I usually don't even think too much about handicap stalls, but for whatever reason, I'm on one now. So anyway, so then when you're. When you're in a position where like this, you have to try to time it because there's not. There's no music in there. There's nothing. It's just silence. It's just the echoes of a Target restroom. The guy in the urinal directly next to me. I'm in the stall. I have to wait till the flush before I can start any action, because then otherwise it's. It's a whole thing. I mean, it's not like he. This guy's like, oh, I wonder what that guy's doing in there. He knows what I'm doing in there. So, I mean, I guess I'm not surprising anybody, but either way, so, yeah, life comes at you fast. One minute you're. Man, you look fantastic for your age. Look at this guy. There's no way you're in your early 40s. There's no chance. Look at this guy with the beard and everything. And then next minute, you're about to yourself and you're trying to hold it in so that you don't get heard. Johnny, how'd your day go? Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. The holiday season can be exhausting with all the parties and the end of year celebrations. But don't forget to take care of yourself by stocking up on your favorite nutritional products. Now through December 30, shop in store and online and save on items like Cliff Snack Bars, Luna Bars, Boost Nutritional Energy Drinks, Premier Protein Shakes, Z Bar Variety Packs, Open Nature Powder and Body Fortress Protein powder. Offers end December 30th. Restrictions apply. Offers may vary. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details. This week on Point game with me, C.J. toledano and Isaiah Thomas, it debuts a new segment called no Days off where he gives flowers to a player that is doing their thing and that we should all be watching. Check it out. I want to give light and shine to somebody that has that slow grind mentality over a rookie over there in the with the New Orleans Pelicans, Garrett Queen, somebody who, you know, had to mentally have a slow grind mentality. Cause he got hurt in summer league, I believe, and had a little surgery where he had to just, you know, slow down a little bit and get his mind right. And when he got back healthy, as everybody's seen this year, he's a light on the New Orleans Pelicans. He's been having hell of a rookie year. Download the DraftKings sportsbook app and use point game. That's code point game. Bet five bucks and get $200 in bonus bets if your bet wins. In partnership with DraftKings, the Crown is yours. Gambling problem call 1-800-Gambler in New York, call 877-8-HOPE&WY or text hopeny 467-369 in Connecticut. Help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org Please play responsibly on behalf of Boot Hill Casino and Resort in Kansas. Pass through a per wager tax. May apply in Illinois 21 and over. Age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario, restrictions apply. Vet must win to which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required. NBA League Pass Auto renews until canceled. Additional terms at DKNG Co Audio Limited time offer this is Jacob Goldstein from what's yous Problem? When you buy business software from lots of vendors, the costs add up and it gets complicated and confusing. Odoo solves this. It's a single company that sells a suite of enterprise apps that handles everything from accounting to inventory to sales. Odoo is all connected on a single platform in a simple and affordable way. You can save money without missing out on the features you need. Check out odoo@o d o o.com that's o d o o.com hey audiobook lovers. This week on the podcast I'm sitting down with musician, producer and walking encyclopedia Questlove, we're talking about Mark Ronson's memoir, Night People how to Be a DJ in 90s New York City. All right, like we talked about before, Mark Ronson found sanctuary in the DJ booth. What's a tool or piece of equipment in the studio or on stage that gives you the most control? So I have two microphones on stage. We have the microphone that you hear as the audience. Then we have a second microphone in which we communicate with each other. I feel like that second microphone kind of saved all of our friendships. No band likes each other after 20 years or 25 years. The Beatles broke up in seven and a half years, and we're going on 35. Listen to earsay the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line. But first, There, the last one. Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes. Well, as everybody knows, we are now found on the iHeartRadio app, the free app. By the way, one of my favorite things about iHeart is this. The jingle ball that they do every December, they take a collection of some of the biggest pop stars and rock stars in the world, and they bring them to you all in one monster show just for the holidays. I think it's the coolest thing. I also now that I kind of have an in and in slightly with I heart, I'm pitching myself as the host of one of these jingle balls for 2026. Now, Johnny, it's not gonna be easy. It's not gonna be easy at all. We got a lot of work to do in 26 in order to accomplish this goal. But I'm working on it. For those of you that don't know Jingle Ball is and you're just, you're a crazy person. You know, Jingle Ball is. It's basically, it's the. In the. The biggest markets in the United States and the biggest radio market, media markets, United States, they host these big shows, right? So we're talking Miami, Florida. We're talking Atlanta, Georgia, Washington, D.C. philadelphia, Louisiana. Boston, New York, Chicago, Detroit. I mean, the biggest cities in the United States. And then, you know, the local iHeartradio station hosts the big jingle ball. Huge artists. We're talking Jelly Roll Shinedown, ajr, Alex Warren, Ed Sheeran is doing the one in Boston here. Coming up, mgk, my guy. I got them double X's on my wrist. Huge shows, okay? Huge shows. I'd like to. All I want to do is host. I'm not asking to perform. Although with that being said, I have prepared some jokes. I think it Would be awesome to have a host that comes out, you know, kind of feeling it out similar to like an award show. And let's just keep it moving but then keep it light hearted. Keep the, have some little boom, boom, boom, little one liners in between. So Johnny, fits cool with you. I would like to try out some of the material that I have here that I think is a sample of what I could do. What I would say when I host Jingle Ball in 2026, because I'm serious about this. I'm not saying, you know, bring the Jingle Ball to Omaha where I'm at. I'll go to you. Okay? I'll go to you and we'll do, we'll do the big Jingle Ball and I'll just maybe host one. Okay, so here's. All right, Johnny. So I'm getting. Let's imagine big arena, okay? We're at the, let's, let's pretend we're in Atlanta right now. Okay? They brought me out. I'm hosting Big show. We got Little John and friends. Nelly's going to be here. Okay. We're at the Capital Wand State Farm arena or something. Okay, let's see if, let's see what I can do. Let's. This is going to be the crowd. Okay, Johnny. Yeah. Thank you. Welcome to Jingle Ball, the only holiday event where the outfits get smaller as the temperature drops. Thank you, Johnny. Well, G, we'll need you there too. We'll do. Well, we'll need you there too to help me out with some of this stuff. I saw a performer backstage wearing something that legally qualified as dental floss. If you're listening at home. Yes, the crowd looks incredible tonight. Everyone's dressed festive, like they're ready for Christmas or trying really hard to make their ex jealous on Instagram. So that's what I'm saying, Johnny. I got these jokes. I think it would just be funny. I come out, I just, you know, give a few of these one liners and you know, and that could be, you know, that, that'd be me coming out right before Nelly. Okay. And Ellie's gonna like, he's gonna open and then, you know, Little John. Little John and Friends is coming up. Okay. You know, coming up just a little bit. But first, you know, Santa's got his nice list and his naughty list. I'm on that. We're gonna circle back on that list. You know, Santa shows up tonight. Don't freak out. He's just here for the influencers. I asked Santa for a six pack this year. He Delivered, just not the kind you drink responsibly. See, that's what I'm saying. Let's get the crowd going. Yeah, man, this crowd is electric and slightly drunk, which, honestly, is the ideal Christmas ratio. I smell peppermint cocoa in a third cent. I'll politely label somebody pre gamed in the parking lot, you know, and then we'll bring out a little John. I'll be fun. Okay, if. Whenever you're in Atlanta, you know, you got to have Jermaine Dupree and his friends as well. So before I bring out Jermaine, you know, let's. You know, let's make some noise. Not too much, though. Security is already looking at us like someone heroes child support. Now, I didn't mean that about you, Jermaine. I. That was not a shot at Jermaine. Just want to know that I don't want to get in trouble at the Jingle Ball. Give it up one more time, people. My watch just buzzed to check if I'm doing cardio or experiencing fear. I would be quite scared. I. I think, you know, Mariah Carey hasn't fully thawed yet, but she sends her regards. Or at least a high note that cracked a satellite. I don't know. Mariah is not on this year's Jingle Ball. If she is on next year's, I'm probably gonna have to throw that joke away. These performers look incredible. The kind of incredible that makes me rethink everything I eat after 9pm which lately has been a lot of chocolate. I've been eating like leftover Halloween candy. I'm about through it, so that's. I have truly been gaining weight from probably my snacking. That or the prednisone. I'm on that. That steroid always does it to me. That one I just made up on the spot here. I did not pre write that joke. I don't even think I'm good. That was just life. That one. That one was for you. That one was just life hosting Jingle Balls Wild. One minute I'm hyping up the crowd, the next I'm dodging a stage manager who moves like he's powered by pure espresso resentment. If you were a crash backstage, don't worry, that's just me knocking over a prop worth more than my car. Especially if I don't get those tires soon. What's that car worth with no wheels, baby. Thanks, Johnny. That was just real life as well. Ah, then you, you know, then you always. You always got to send them home happy, right? You know, drive Safe, be kind, tip well. And if you can't do all three, at least lie confidently about two happy holidays. And remember, if tonight gets blurry, that's not the lights, that's the choices. I'm telling you what I heart. If you're listening, I know you are. We've gotta get me on this jingle ball next year. I'm available, but I'd prefer to book it early just so that I can kind of manage, you know, manage my. Manage my week a little easier. So. Well, there you go. Just a little, little Christmas spirit we've got in the air right now. I can feel it. As I was hurriedly rushing through the target so I didn't myself, I could feel the energy that Christmas is almost Snow falls soft on the roof top glow the fire hums while the laughter flows Jeremy's voice It's the holiday show Laugh with me oh can't you see See it's a sleigh ride of comedy through the pines and jokes so free Laugh with me Laugh with me. The punchlines land like falling snow Witty and warm they steal the show A pod casket wrapped with a bow Every giggle lights the tree Every chuckle harmony Laugh with me oh, can't you see? It's a sleigh ride of comer through the pines and jokes so free Laugh with me, laugh with me Eggnog sips and a belly full of cheer Stories and jokes that we hold so near Jeremy's laugh is the sound we all hear. Eggnog sips and a belly full of cheer Stories and jokes that we hold so near Jeremy's laugh is the sound we all hear. Merry Christmas, everybody. Amazon five Star Theater presents real customer reviews performed by Ed Helms. Tonight's review Tactical jacket. I was living a simple life. Didn't get out much. Then I bought this jacket and everything changed. Women came flocking to me from lands domestic and foreign. On the 245 day sailboat voyage home I was attacked by a shark. I knew it was the jacket he was after giving up the jacket in exchange for my life. 5 stars Amazon Customer 69 Shop the perfect gift this holiday on Amazon. What a matchup we got y'. All. This is that classic HBCU vibe. Non stop action. The band is rocking and the crowd lit. Chance echo drum beat everybody Showing that school pride game like this. Yeah, it caused for an ice cold Coca Cola. Ah, crisp and refreshing. That's a game changer right there. Yeah, that taste always hits the right note. Just like the band at halftime. And just like that we're back at it. Passionate fans. School colors everywhere and in ice cold Coca Cola. That's a winning combo no matter the sport, no matter the yard. Everybody knows fan work is thirsty work. So grab a Coca Cola and keep that HBCU pride going. Get ready for your next TV obsession. All's Fair Starring Kim Kardashian, Naomi Watts, Niecy Nash Betts, Teyana Taylor. With Sarah Paulson and Glenn Close. A team of fierce female divorce attorneys leave a male dominated firm to start their own. Filled with scandalous secrets and shifting allegiances both in the courtroom and within their own ranks, these ladies know that lawyers are a girl's best friend. 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