
Police in Resort Vacation Areas: The Threats and Violent Crime Behind the Illusion of Paradise. To most people, the phrase Police in Resort Vacation Areas brings to mind palm trees, ocean breezes, and a slower, easier pace of life. It’s the image of a peaceful escape, where crime feels distant and danger seems unlikely.
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John J. Wiley
He is a retired police officer. He spent much of his career working in coastal resort towns where manpower was in short supply. He's here to talk about some incidents from the job, how it impacted him, and much more. Welcome to the Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. In the Law Enforcement Talk Radio show, we are joined by special guests talking about their experiences, the realities of investigating crimes, plus those who've experienced horrendous trauma. Police, first responders, military and victims of crime share their stories. Hi, I'm John J. Wiley. In addition to being a broadcaster, I'm also a retired police sergeant. Be sure to check out our website, letradio.com and also like us on Facebook Search for the Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. There's a couple ways you can stay in touch and keep informed of what's going on with the Law Enforcement Talk radio show. Number one, go to our website letradio.com sign up for our email newsletter. It's real easy to find. I promise we don't spam you. I send out about one email every two weeks or so and there's also a feature called Broadcast Channels on our Facebook page where we send messages directly to your inbox, directly to your messenger. Real easy to sign up for. Make sure you like or follow the Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show Facebook page. And up top you'll see Broadcast Channels one for free podcast versions of the radio show. Another one top post of the day so you too can stay informed quickly, easily and best of all, like always free. Contact Us from the great state of North Carolina, we have Dr. Don D. Day on the Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. He is a retired police officer from the Apex North Carolina Police Department who worked in lots of coastal resort communities. We think it would be a piece of cake and usually is not. And I'm kind of surprised some of the stories don't tell him. He's going to talk about some of the impact on him from police work three hours of doing the job. He's also author of the book Go Smoke and the Badge A Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear and a Weight of duty. His website is drdrdondi.com. that's Dr. Dondi.com. Dr. Dondi, thanks for being guest on our law enforcement talk radio show. Thanks for your service. Both very much appreciated.
Dr. Don D. Day
Yeah, thank you. Thank you for having me.
John J. Wiley
By the way, I gotta tell you a story. I teased this earlier. I knew one other guy with the name of Dondi. He spelled his first name a little different. He used two E's instead of I. I was in a gunfight with him. He did a murder. He murdered someone, took their Corvette, robbed them, got in a gunfight with me and it was an all out brawl. Thank goodness he survived. I survived as well. But you're the second Dondi I've met my entire life.
Dr. Don D. Day
Right, right. It's very uncommon up around the Cincinnati, Ohio area. It's more common. I've met about seven people with the same name.
John J. Wiley
So yeah, it's a name you don't hear very often. Is it an old school name, is it ethnic name, or is it a combination of both?
Dr. Don D. Day
Well, you know, the story that I've been told by my grandmother is Irish name, but it was carried over. And in Cincinnati, in the Cincinnati News Times, there was a cartoon character named Dondi. It was a redheaded boy with blue eyes who was always into trouble, kind of like Dennis the Menace to a certain extent. And for some reason, my mother just decided to name me that. So that's how that came about.
John J. Wiley
See, I'm of Irish Catholic descent. My, my grandparents immigrated from Ireland and I've never heard that name before. I've heard it twice now.
Dr. Don D. Day
Right, right, right.
John J. Wiley
So imagine if I go back to visit there. I'll run in some Dundees.
Dr. Don D. Day
Well, I think so. And you can actually google it and see the doll cartoon strips online. It's really interesting.
John J. Wiley
Next question. Before we get into your story. Were you brutalized as a child with that name?
Dr. Don D. Day
Oh my gosh, no, not really. If anything, it anytime somebody heard the name, they knew if they knew me, they were like, oh, absolutely, I knew him. So, you know, but you know, I couldn't hide from things, especially from my mother.
John J. Wiley
No, no. By the way, back in the day, when our mothers would stick their head out the door or the window and say, get inside, it's time for dinner. And they call you by your full name, your first and last and middle name, you knew it was time to go indoors.
Dr. Don D. Day
Absolutely, absolutely.
John J. Wiley
And if you gave her any back talk, my mother's Irish Catholic. She would give you the back of her hand in a heartbeat.
Dr. Don D. Day
Absolutely. You know, it was kind of interesting. You know, in our neighborhood, I called them, for lack of a better word, the town criers. Right. They knew the kids in the neighborhood and, you know, all they had to do was say, Dondi did this or Dondi did that. And everybody knew that was me. So I could never really hide from anything whatsoever.
John J. Wiley
Well, back in the day. And we're going to walk down memory lane just a little bit, then we'll get into your story. Back in the day, it wasn't just your parents disciplined you, it was the teachers, it was the principals, and it was the neighbors, correct?
Dr. Don D. Day
Yes, it was.
John J. Wiley
And by the way, I learned respect from neighborhood boys.
Dr. Don D. Day
Mm. Yeah, absolutely. You know, in the book that we're talking about today is really. It's my sixth book. The very first one that I wrote is about, you know, what it's like to grow up here on the coast. It was really interesting.
John J. Wiley
But let me ask you a question. Did you grow up in Ohio or did you grow up in Carolina?
Dr. Don D. Day
North Carolina. My father was military.
John J. Wiley
Gotcha.
Dr. Don D. Day
He was a marine. Yep. Got stationed here, met my mother, loved it, settled down here. But we, we bounced back and forth between North Carolina and Ohio.
John J. Wiley
Gotcha.
Dr. Don D. Day
Over the years. Yes.
John J. Wiley
So the. I was going to ask you how you wound up policing in North Carolina, but it's not a long stretch because you lived there.
Dr. Don D. Day
Yes. Yeah, you know, we, we love it here. If you really like a slow coastal lifestyle, it's defin here. I lived up in Chicago for about nine years after I retired from Apex. And you know, I love Chicago. I love the area, the subdivision. The area that we lived in was very, very nice. However, the winters are brutal, tough, and the cost of living is so much more than it is here.
John J. Wiley
I have friends in the Chicago area. I've some conferences in Chicago in February and in downtown Chicago, the Miracle Mile. And I don't care what they tell you. It's cold. It is really cold.
Dr. Don D. Day
You know, when you're wearing a suit or even, you know, the pants they give you in law enforcement, the first time you experience a 40 below wind chill, wind hit you, you'll know it. It's brutal. It really is. It's so cold.
John J. Wiley
I went to your website and I saw pictures of you and I think you're a little younger than me, but started policing in the Baltimore Police Department in 1980. They gave us wool pants which let everything in. They were, they were cold. They were really cold. And woolen reefers for wintertime and they, they would add 25. You'd have 25 pounds extra weight on you when you had the reefer on between the gun belt and everything else. When they got wet in the wintertime, it was about £40.
Dr. Don D. Day
Yep, absolutely.
John J. Wiley
And you smell like a wet dog. I don't care what you do, you just don't get that smell out of you.
Dr. Don D. Day
You know, we were issued those types of pants in the shirts at one time, but they eventually switched over to like a polyester, which was even worse. I mean, it would dry quicker, but you would constantly stay cold. And here on the coast, you know, even though the temperatures are moderate, it still gets col does and that wind
John J. Wiley
and all that humidity. We're talking with Dr. Don D. Day, retired police officer from Apex, North Carolina. Author of multiple books. The most recent is Ghosts, Smoke and the Badge, A Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear, and a Weight of Duty. His website is Dr. Dr. Hyphen dondi.com that's Dr. Dondi.com and if you're on the Clubhouse Drop in audio chat app, be sure to look for me and follow me. My name's John the Letter J. Wiley W I L E Y. You can also search for at LetradiosHow. That's John J. Wiley W I L E Y at let Radio show on the Clubhouse Drop in audio chat app. This is Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. Don't go anywhere. We'll be right back. Please stop me if any of this sounds familiar. I'm too old to start investing in stocks. I'm too old to learn about investing. I don't have the time and energy to learn about investing. Suppose an app existed that did everything for you automatically? There is, and I've been using it. Get more details about it at let savings.com let's that's the letter L letter E letter T savings.com the information is not personal financial advice. That past performance does not guarantee future results and that investment involves risk, including the loss of principal.
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John J. Wiley
Return to conversation with Dr. Don D. Day on the Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. He is a retired police officer from Apex North Carolina. He worked in many resort communities as a police officer in coastal North Carolina, which we'll talk about in a few moments. That stuff still happened there. He's the author of multiple books. His most recent is Ghost Smoke and the Badge, A Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear and the Weight of Duty. Sounds kind of heavy duty. And his website is Dr. DrDr Dondi dot com. That's Dr. Dondi dot com. Before we get into your books,
Dr. Don D. Day
number
John J. Wiley
one, what possessed you to go into policing? Was this a calling if you came from a military family, wasn't something you grew up in, right?
Dr. Don D. Day
Well, yeah, actually, it was. It was kind of inherited. My grandfather was a police officer in Cincinnati. My father was a police officer for a short time after he got out of the Marine Corps. And then I went in, and then my younger brother went in as well. So we kind come from a line of police officers.
John J. Wiley
So. And here's the quote. When I started in Baltimore Police Department, we had a lot of the more experienced officers that were Vietnam combat veterans and they didn't play. We had a few command staff that were Korean War veterans at the time. This is 1980. So they were around and they made their presence known. But the main thing they talked about was respect. You always show respect until they change the tone of the conversation. Then there's absolutely no backing down because there's an audience watching what you do. But here's before we go into your story, being in the Baltimore Police Department, I got exposed to a lot of violence, lots of crime, lots of trauma, all that stuff. And I thought mistakenly that the county guys, the guys that worked, and I say guys, that means men and women that worked in the resort communities, the coastal communities, had it easy. I had no idea. Is that true?
Dr. Don D. Day
Yeah, definitely. It's a different type of law enforcement. You're dealing with a different clientele, let me put it that way. But the crime is still there. And you have bad actors coming in from a lot of different areas that, you know, they come down and look for opportunities. They're breaking in the houses, they're breaking in the cars. There's considerable amount of rape and assaults. I mean, you think about it, the people come down, they're having a good time, they may drink a little bit too much, have a little bit too much fun, and then you're called to deal with it. Right? And that kind of leads into some of the issues with law enforcement. When you're working in a coastal community, your backup may be anywhere from 15 to 30 minutes away. So a lot of times you are out there by yourself. And things can go wrong really quickly if you don't know how to handle things. For instance, one of the things that I had to deal with, and I think about a lot of these calls is, you know, a party goes, you know, sideways. People are starting to fight and argue. They go out onto the balcony of this four story condominium complex. When I arrive, you know, I have to immediately go hands on with somebody and he's about to pick me up and throw me over the rail four stories down, right? And then you need to make a decision. How are you going to handle it? What type of force you're going to use to get out of that situation. You know, the first thing is try to use your voice and calm them down. And the last resort is, you know, taking some type of lethal action against them.
John J. Wiley
But it is, it really is a last resort. Well, and one of the things that I kind of object to is a recent term that a lot of people use, de escalation and de escalation techniques. Like we weren't doing that in the 80s. We didn't shoot everybody. We dealt with, we didn't go hands on with everybody. We dealt with. As a matter of fact, that wasn't very often, but when it was, it was ugly. And by the way, I've had a guest on the show say in the past that de escalation is a technique that's got to be done by both parties, not just one.
Dr. Don D. Day
It is, it is. You know, one of the things I learned a long time ago, and it was from a mentor, is a lot of times the de escalation is to not take any action. A lot of times people are just upset, they want to vent or whatever the case may be, and you just sit there, protect yourself, but let them just get it out and then you can see it kind of leave them, right? They kind of calm down and then, you know, you're not going to talk sense into somebody that is agitated. You know, you've got to think about how you're going to approach them to get them to calm down. And my point with that is just let them vent, let them get it out. And a lot of times they'll just calm right down.
John J. Wiley
One of the things that we had, and I'm going to use this example, domestic disputes, family disturbances, which I hated, I can't stand them to this day. As a matter of fact, I cannot stand any conversations about he said, she said, who struck John, other than them, I'm not interested. I'm not the guy anymore. But one of the things that we would do is we scan the people involved and say, well, we're talking to them. When we try to calm them down, Number one, you want to calm them down. Number two, you want to find out whether there is a threat, there's a criminal there. Are they all victims? Are they a threat to you? Are they a threat to other people? Do it to take action right away. These were things that I would imagine that you had to deal with as well.
Dr. Don D. Day
Oh, absolutely. A lot of times, you know, the number one rule when you're dealing with domestics is you never go in, never lie. Yeah. Because that is one of the most dangerous situations that you get into. But if we had a domestic in some of these coastal communities, we would have to call either the highway patrol or the sheriff department to come back us up. A lot of times they were the closest, and we would have to wait for them the time they arrived. A lot of times the domestic is over, one party is left.
John J. Wiley
Right.
Dr. Don D. Day
You know, it's kind of resolved itself, and then it turns into some type of investigation that you need to do. But if you get there and you see that it is hot, that, you know, the people are still arguing, well, you know, you have to think about how you're going to approach that. But you never go in just full guns blazing. Right. There are certain things you have to do. I had a mentor tell me one time, and, you know, when you're a worker, you. You just don't. You. You don't know everything. You have to pick it up as you go. I remember standing in front of the door of this one house, and it was blacked out. And I'm sitting there looking through this screen door, and then I see the silhouette of a man with a shotgun. And my. My mentor told me it's like you never stand in front of a door.
John J. Wiley
Never stand in front of doors or windows. Ever.
Dr. Don D. Day
Yeah, ever. And so that was a tough lesson for me to learn. It was a very good lesson. But, you know, things could have went really bad quickly. Thank God they didn't. But, yeah, that taught me something. And the thing about it is, when you're even wearing a vest, you know, somebody shooting you with a slug, it's going to be a very bad day.
John J. Wiley
It's going to be a really bad day. We're talking with Dr. Don D. Days, a retired police officer from Apex, North Carolina, worked in multiple coastal resort communities. And we'll talk about some of that in a few moments. He's the author of multiple books. Most recent book is Ghost Smoke and the Badge, A memoir of brotherhood, fear and a weight of duty. And his website is drdondee.com that's Dr.dondi.com d r d o n d I.com this is law enforcement talk radio show. Don't go anywhere. We will be right back. You know we used to have an app and it was very popular app and then guess what? We couldn't hold a candle through our Facebook presence. How many people have the mobile Facebook app already installed on their phone? How many people use it on their computer? Make sure you follow us, make sure you like us on our Facebook page. Just search for law enforcement talk radio show and podcast and be sure to send us a comment to one of the posts. Best of all as 100% free, this is the story of the 1. As a maintenance tech at a university, he knows ordering from multiple suppliers takes time away from keeping their arena up and running. That's why he counts on Grainger to get everything he needs from lighting and H vac parts to plumbing supplies all in one place. And with fast, dependable delivery, he's stocked and ready for the next tip off. Call 1-800-granger. Click granger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done. During Our conversation with Dr. Don D. Day on a law enforcement talk radio show, he is retired police officer from Apex, North Carolina. He worked in multiple coastal resort communities. He's the author of multiple books. Most recent is Ghost Smoke and the Badge, A Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear and a Weight of Duty. And his website is drdondee.com this d r d o n d I.com Dr. Dondi.com understanding that look, the domestic disputes are same. And by the way, one of the things I remember talking with someone was way back in the day when I was a police officer and they're like, I don't understand. I live in a nice town in the, in the county and, and they stole my car. I'm like, where do you think these, by the way? They take buses, they have those stolen cars. Where do you think they go? Do you think they steal from the worst neighborhoods when no one's got anything? Or they go to the nice neighborhoods when the nice neighborhoods said you're not safe no matter where you go?
Dr. Don D. Day
Absolutely. People, there's a fallacy. People seem, and you can see it, everybody believes they're safe until they realize that most they're not safe. Even at your residency, things can happen, things can come to you. But what I'VE seen over the years during hurricanes and just the winter times, people look for opportunities. The bad guys are out there, they are looking. And even in the wintertime, as we talked about briefly, you know, the wintertime, it's one of those things where, you know, the night just drums on. You become so bored and so tired, nothing's going on. And that's when things break. That's when, you know, all of a sudden you go from, you know, being bored to death to being in a terror situation. Your heart rate, your adrenaline just dumps. There was one night I was parked on the side of the road, just, you know, the wintertime, just trying to stay awake. And I always sat near a curve. I always like drunk drivers. And on the beach there's no lack of drunk drivers any day, any time they're out there. So I park on this curve and I'd watch the cars go around the curve. And I was sitting up near a condominium complex and just saw some movement underneath the condominium. And I snuck up to it in the patrol car, got out, started walking up. Next thing I know, watching three guys dashing out the windows of cars. They were, they were stealing everything they could find. And a lot of people leave their firearms in the cars, right when, when I confronted them, now I'm by myself, totally by myself, confronted them. You know, they complied with everything that I told them to do. Get down on the ground. You know, I was calling for backup. When my backup got there, we went in, handcuffed the guys and then went in and took a look at what they had done. Believe it or not, they, there was firearms in there, radar detectors, cash, everything they could get out of these cars. They were just bashing the windows. And oh, another thing that was really interesting. The get up car, get, getaway car was just parked right up the street with the guy sitting in it, engine running. So they, they were opportunists. They were there to get something really quick. But it happens. It happens all the time.
John J. Wiley
It does. And the thing about it is, and I say this all the time, by the way, stranger on stranger, crime is very rare. It's usually if it's going to be someone that's going to hurt you, it's usually be someone you know. The case of homicides is someone you know. However, the big exception to that is if you, you disrupt and you startle someone committing another crime. So I'm very, very much aware that while I'm walking my dog at night, I need to look at my surroundings. And some people say I'm a little, I'm a little hyper vigilant. How about you?
Dr. Don D. Day
Oh, absolutely. You know, you become that way and the job actually ingrains that into you a little bit more because you need to be aware of everything going on around you. Somebody walking down the street, if they're eyeballing you, you need to be eyeballing them back. Let them know that you're. You're not, you're not going to.
John J. Wiley
And I look, I have a little thing say. I say in my mind. Don't say it aloud. My wife says it now. I'm not the one. I'm not the one you want to play with.
Dr. Don D. Day
Exactly, exactly. Sitting with your back to the door, away from the door. You need to be seeing everything. You know, people, you know, you see people are just complacent. A lot of times you're walking down the street and half the people you, you see are on their phones. They've got their faces down. They're not paying attention to what's going on. Now, my wife and I, she thought it was kind of strange how I would never sit with my back towards the door and then.
John J. Wiley
No, me either. Go, don't do it.
Dr. Don D. Day
I told her, I was like, well, this is why I need to be seeing everything coming in and out. You know, it took quite a long time. Now, I still conceal carry, but it took a long time before I became comfortable going places without my sidearm. But in today's society, it's becoming more and more apparent that I'm going to have to start carrying my arms everywhere I go.
John J. Wiley
I took many years where I did not carry. And what changed that for me was the school shooting of Sandy Hook in Connecticut. Because I know me, I would go in, even though I didn't live in Connecticut at the time, I would go in and at least with a gun, I got a fighting chance. He may have a rifle, but I'm gonna, I'm gonna have, I'm going out there. And that's what prompted me to change.
Dr. Don D. Day
Yeah, absolutely. I mean, think about this. And I've had a couple of instances where, you know, a trooper be on the side of the road wrestling with somebody. Stop. And you lend a hand or, you know, I've had bar fight. Police officers are trying to restrain somebody. That's kind of a common theme here on the coast. So you jump in and help them. But what happens if you run into something worse than that? Right where like you said, the school shooting. Oh, my gosh.
John J. Wiley
One of the things that. And I want to get a response to you very quickly is because we got a break coming up. When I told my wife this reason why women are trained to go for the eyeballs in self defense tactics is not to incapacitate the attacker, is to force them out of their aggressive state into a defensive state. It's almost impossible. And when you put lead down range at a bad guy it forces them, it changes their game plan.
Dr. Don D. Day
Oh yeah, yeah. Absolutely. Everything about it. There was a. If we got another minute, I've got another story.
John J. Wiley
How about this? Why don't we talk about that story when we come back. We were talking with Dr. Don D Day and it's D o n d I. He's retired from the Apex North Carolina police department and he worked in multiple coastal beachside resort towns in North Carolina. He went to the Apex police department. He's author multiple books. Most recent is Go Smoke and the Badge A Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear and a Weight of Duty. And his website is Dr. Dr. Dondi.com this d r d o n d I.com Dr. Dondi.comthis is law enforcement talk radio show. We're going to talk in a few moments about the impact on him. I'm going to ask you very quickly do you feel impacted still by police work?
Dr. Don D. Day
Oh yeah, absolutely. Once it gets into your blood it's, it's something that you're, you're, you're going to live with the rest of your life. You're going to walk cop, you're going to talk cop, you're going to think cop and it law enforcement, such a good profession. Yeah, I love law enforcement.
John J. Wiley
It's a great profession. And by the way I jokingly tell people that I'll be the guy in the old folks home pushing a walker with tennis balls on him and go shh, there's five. Oh he looks like a cop, I look like one, I talk like one, I act like one and I am not embarrassed or ashamed of that at all. This is law enforcement talk radio show. We'll take a short break. I promise you we'll be right back.
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John J. Wiley
Return a conversation with Dr. Don D Day on a law enforcement talk radio show. He is a retired police officer from Apex North Carolina police department and he worked in multiple coastal resort towns. Before that he's author of multiple Books Ghost Most recent Ghosts Smoke and the A Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear and the Weight of Duty. His website is drdond.com that's d r d o n d I.com Dr. Dondi.com got a quick question for you. And generally I put a lot of this place, a lot of this stuff from police work to bed, where it doesn't bother me as much. There's things I don't do. One and I do, I'm very good about going to bed around the same time every night. I eat around the same time every day. I'm really close to being self aware and prayer and meditation, all that stuff. Because what I found for me and this I find. I don't watch dash cam videos, I don't watch police videos. I don't watch any stuff. And there's certain things on tv, they're so realistic that I'm like, I start screaming the TV and eliminate that stuff at all because the bad stuff happens or comes up when I least expect it.
Dr. Don D. Day
You know, I agree with, with everything that you just said. I don't watch cop movies because they're, they're so unrealistic.
John J. Wiley
Right.
Dr. Don D. Day
It just drives me insane. And then when I watch realistic cop shows or videos, you know, I become so engrossed in the moment, my heart's racing, it's pounding and I can see myself in a lot of the situations that they're in. You know, one of the things that I will watch once in a while is like high Highway Patrol chases or something. And you can see yourself, you've been in, you know, that situation, you have done the stuff that these troopers are doing and it can, it can really take a toll on you somewhat. I mean, if you think about it, think about how many adrenaline dumps you've had.
John J. Wiley
I've lost track.
Dr. Don D. Day
Yeah. And you know that while it's exciting and it's fun, it's doing it over the years. It ages you, it tires you, it does everything to you. So there are some bad effects to it, but man, I love it. And anytime I pass blue lights on the side of the road, you know, it's, you know, you want to jump into it and just go and be part of that. But when you retire, you know, things are a lot different. Your whole outlook, everything just changes.
John J. Wiley
Mine, my outlook changed. I still think like a cop a lot of times. And by the way, I pulled over and I've helped officers in fights. That's not a problem. I'll continue to do that even when I'm an Old geezer, which I'm not yet. I'm pretty. I'm a lot older than I thought I'd be. I never thought I'd live this long, but I'll continue to do that. And they did that for me. I'm gonna do that for them when I have to be aware. Because quite honestly, Dondi, it takes so long for me to get back to what I call my center. And by the way, I used to watch some of his videos. And every now and then on my phone, I'll do that. I'll watch a video, and I hear my wife yelling from another room, you need to turn that stuff off. Because I'm vocalizing the whole time.
Dr. Don D. Day
It's absolutely true. I do the same thing. I think it's. It just becomes ingrained and wired in us, and we. We take the same reactions. But again, you know, a lot of times when you are in that moment, you're reliving those scenarios that you went through. You've been through them. You know what the chase is like. You know what the wreck is like. You know, all these things I tell my wife, you know, I'll watch a video. And I was like, you know, I've been there. I've done that. You know, I pitted a car, and I've seen it wreck. You know, I've seen it flip over, roll over so many times where people get ejected from it. Bad things happen. But I think that's what it is, is you're just reliving that moment yourself, and that's why you become so vocal. You start screaming at, put it down. Put it down. Or, you know, there was one gentleman stopped. He. The first thing he did was he got out and he reached under the seat and. Which I thought I was already drawn down on him. And he pulls out a handgun. And he doesn't point it at me. He just throws it on the ground and starts running. And I'm screaming at him. I was watching a video, something very similar the other day, and I was like, I've been there. I've seen, I've done. Yeah.
John J. Wiley
And what they don't explain. And by the way, I've adopted an attitude, especially on the Facebook page. 99% of responses that people get in the law enforcement talk radio show Facebook page are positive. There's a few that are like, well, why didn't they tase them instead of shooting them? I'm like, well, we had a saying back when I was policing, and we didn't have tasers back then, by the way. Tasers fail 25 to 40% of the time. That's the estimate. And it's not as it's. It's intended for when people resist arrest. It's not intended as a weapon for self defense when it comes to lethal force. And we had a. For example, I don't feel it's my job to educate people the 21 foot rule when it comes to edge weapons. And people don't, they don't understand that. They're like, well, he's a long ways away. Why did that to shoot him? Because he's within 21ft and he can get to you and stab you, you know what? Many times.
Dr. Don D. Day
You know, it's not just a knife. It could be a bat.
John J. Wiley
Oh yeah.
Dr. Don D. Day
Be a pipe. It could be anything.
John J. Wiley
We just had an officer, I think in New Jersey, a sergeant who shot a guy armed with a bat. Very confrontational. And the state is bringing charges in. He's being charged with manslaughter and for on duty shooting of a guy armed with a baseball.
Dr. Don D. Day
Wow. You know, and that could have been us. You and I, we were in law enforcement about the same time. So I went in in 87 and like you, we didn't have tasers. In fact, we didn't even have pepper spray. We had.
John J. Wiley
What did they say about pepper spray when they back? They issued mace. Was what you called it pepper spray. Say mace only works on bad, on innocent bystanders and police. It doesn't work on anybody else.
Dr. Don D. Day
You're right about that. But yeah, the law enforcement has changed over the years. But for whoever it is bringing charges against that officer, I think a lot of the issues that I've seen over the years is it's armchair quarterbacking.
John J. Wiley
Exactly.
Dr. Don D. Day
It's people making these assumptions and they don't know they weren't there. They live.
John J. Wiley
They totally disregard Supreme Court findings about police and they proceed anyway. But here's. And we'll get to your story in a moment. They'll use the grand jury as a tactic because they lack political backbone to say the officer did the wrong and we're not going to prosecute them. So your most recent book you wrote Go Smoke in a Badge, a memoir of brotherhood, fear and a weight of duty. Did you write that for cathartic reasons or you have a story to tell?
Dr. Don D. Day
Well, what prompted it was I would sit down and tell my children these stories and one day I just thought, well, I need to just write about it and put it down. Of course, it doesn't contain every call, every memory it's just a snapshot of what it was like for me in law enforcement. So that's how it originated, was exactly that. And I took some of the most powerful stories that I recall. I mean, some bad, some good, some funny little bit of everything in there, but it's not a collection of war stories. I tried to put some meaning behind it, how it impacted me and the reason that I went from law enforcement into retirement into a second career, all of that's in there. And my motivations for doing it are in there as well.
John J. Wiley
Well, for me, it was quite honest. I needed something to do because, by the way, the pension that I got from getting hurt was not enough to live off of.
Dr. Don D. Day
Right. Well, I, I decided with the birth of my son, you know, a lot of people that are outside of first responders or military, they don't truly appreciate or know the sacrifice that people like that are making. You miss the holidays, the birthday, you know, all these special events, you're not there. And I sat down one day and I started thinking about it and I was like, you know, I have missed so many special events in my career and I just thought, well, maybe it's time to start another career and I
John J. Wiley
do want to be there for the next one. So your website, by the way, when I wrap things up is Dr. Dr. D O N D I.com Dr. Dondi.com by the way, thank you for your service and thanks for being a guest on Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. Thank you.
Dr. Don D. Day
Thank you.
John J. Wiley
I'd like to thank our guests for coming on the Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. The Law Enforcement Talk Radio show is a nationally syndicated weekly radio show broadcast on numerous AM&FM radio stations across the country. We're always adding more affiliate stations. If you enjoyed the podcast version of the show, which is always free, please do me a favor and tell a friend or two or three. I'll be back in just a few days with another episode of Law Enforcement Talk Radio show and Podcast. Until then, this is John J. Wiley. See ya. I drive my bus in a busy city.
Grainger Advertiser
That's why road safety is so important to me.
John J. Wiley
I know that I. I must slow down and be extra careful when I make a wide turn. Buses need more room than cars. Everyone can help keep our roads safe. Next time you're driving, remember to give buses plenty of time and space to finish turning before driving ahead. Let's all plan to share the road safely. Learn how at www.sharetherodesafely.gov. if you like the show, please take a moment to rate, review and subscribe. It really does help the show to
Dr. Don D. Day
thank you for listening.
Podcast: Law Enforcement Talk: True Crime and Trauma Stories
Host: John "Jay" Wiley
Guest: Dr. Don D. Day, Retired Police Officer (Apex, NC; Coastal NC Resort Communities), Author
Date: April 26, 2026
This episode delves into the unique challenges, dangers, and trauma faced by police officers working in resort vacation areas—settings often perceived as safe havens but harbor their own intense and unpredictable criminal realities. Host John "Jay" Wiley interviews Dr. Don D. Day, a retired North Carolina police officer and author of "Ghosts, Smoke and the Badge," who shares firsthand stories from his career in coastal towns, insights on handling violent and traumatic incidents with minimal backup, and the lasting effects policing has on one's life and psyche.
Introduction of Guest
“My grandfather was a police officer in Cincinnati. My father was a police officer for a short time after he got out of the Marine Corps. And then I went in, and then my younger brother went in as well. So we kind of come from a line of police officers.” (12:08)
Personal Background
“...in Cincinnati, in the Cincinnati News Times, there was a cartoon character named Dondi. It was a redheaded boy with blue eyes who was always into trouble, kind of like Dennis the Menace...” (03:43)
Segment Start: [13:22]
“...a party goes, you know, sideways... I have to immediately go hands on with somebody and he's about to pick me up and throw me over the rail four stories down, right?” (13:22)
Segment Start: [15:15]
De-Escalation Before It Was A “Thing”
"A lot of times the de-escalation is to not take any action...let them vent...then, you know, you're not going to talk sense into somebody that is agitated." (15:47)
Difficult Calls, Dangerous Situations
"I see the silhouette of a man with a shotgun...my mentor told me, you never stand in front of a door." (18:57)
Segment Start: [22:08]
Fallacy of Safety
“Believe it or not, there was firearms in there, radar detectors, cash, everything they could get...they were opportunists.” (22:08)
Hypervigilance—A Permanent Shift
“...people are just complacent. A lot of times you're walking down the street and half the people you see are on their phones...Now, my wife and I, she thought it was kind of strange how I would never sit with my back towards the door...” (26:03)
Segment Start: [29:41]
The Lasting Impact of Policing
"Once it gets into your blood it's, it's something that you're, you're, you're going to live with the rest of your life..." (29:41)
Coping with Past Trauma
"I don't watch cop movies because they're, they're so unrealistic...when I watch realistic cop shows or videos...I become so engrossed in the moment, my heart’s racing, it's pounding and I can see myself in a lot of the situations that they're in." (32:02)
Segment Start: [35:51]
“...it's armchair quarterbacking...people making these assumptions and they don't know, they weren't there.” (38:02)
Segment Start: [38:36]
“...what prompted it was I would sit down and tell my children these stories and one day I just thought, well, I need to just write about it and put it down.” (38:36)
On Resort Policing’s Dangers:
“...the crime is still there. And you have bad actors coming in from a lot of different areas...breaking in the houses, they're breaking in the cars. There's considerable amount of rape and assaults...your backup may be anywhere from 15 to 30 minutes away.” (13:22)
On De-Escalation:
“The de-escalation is to not take any action. A lot of times people are just upset, they want to vent...let them just get it out and then you can see it kind of leave them, right?” (15:47)
On Trauma & Lasting Change:
“...the job actually ingrains that into you a little bit more because you need to be aware of everything going on around you...” (25:33)
“You walk cop, you talk cop, you think cop...You're going to live with [it] the rest of your life.” (29:41)
On Police Criticism:
"...it's armchair quarterbacking...they live [in] their safe little world and they just don't know." (38:02)
On Writing:
“...it's not a collection of war stories. I tried to put some meaning behind it, how it impacted me...” (38:36)
This episode provides a candid, unfiltered look into the realities of policing in places tourists assume are safe. Dr. Don D. Day's stories and insights reveal how violence and trauma are not confined to big cities, but thrive wherever opportunity exists—including the quiet, picturesque coasts. The conversation explores how years of high-stakes work indelibly shape an officer's mind, behavior, and even family life, while also challenging listeners to reconsider assumptions about law enforcement and danger.
Find more about Dr. Don D. Day and his books at: drdondi.com
Contact and follow the show: LET Radio