Le Batard & Friends - Mystery Crate

Episode 350: "Bye, Bye, Billy."

Release Date: October 17, 2025
Hosts/Guests: Mike Ryan, Billy Gil, Roy Bellamy, Chris Cote, Michael Fuentes (Tony), Tony Calatayud, Jeremy Tache, Rose, Jessica

Overview

This episode of the Mystery Crate marks a bittersweet milestone: Billy Gil’s final week as part of the Le Batard & Friends family. With his imminent departure, the crew dedicates much of the episode to sharing memories, poking fun, handling the awkwardness of goodbye, and reflecting on how news of Billy’s exit spread among the team. Balancing heartfelt moments with their trademark chaos and humor, the episode turns into a candid group therapy session on change, friendship, and the peculiar etiquette of workplace goodbyes.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Pilates, Baseboards, and Britishisms (01:42–05:00)

• Billy admits confusion about Pilates, prompting Jessica to explain its origins and mechanics in detail.
• The group riffs on the terminology—like “reformer machine” and “skirting wood” vs. “baseboards.”
• Jessica relates her enthusiasm for Pilates and her British instructor (“She called it a skirting wood. I was like, I’ve never heard that term before, and I love it.” — Jessica, 04:53).
• The group teases Jessica about being a teacher’s pet in Pilates, drawing parallels to her personality in the show’s meeting setting.

2. Dancing with the Stars & Celebrity Gossip (05:00–10:00)

• Ongoing chatter about the current season, with shoutouts to Hilaria Baldwin, Topanga’s husband’s shrimp scandal, and the evolving definition of “celebrity.”
• Commentary on the generational gap in audience appeal for contestants like Alix Earle.
• Playful complaints about Tyra Banks replacing Tom Bergeron as host.
• “You should be able to get both (contestant and character name for voting)... That was so cute, (Topanga) did a dance with Mr. Feeney.” — Jessica & Chris, 07:56

3. The “DraftKings” Advertising Bit & Lucy’s Internet Minute Jingle Origins (10:02–12:02)

• Chris delivers his version of the DraftKings promo, drawing comparisons to EA Sports’ jingle.
• Billy demonstrates how he came up with the catchy “Lucy’s Internet Minute” jingle, describing it as “a scientist in a lab... Dr. Frankenstein, who’s like, oh, I’m looking at the Internet, and this is what I found.” (Billy, 11:08)
• The group debates why Internet content feels scientific to Billy and reflect on the creative process (“I’m just following the music. I’m an artist.” — Billy, 11:48)

4. Lead in Protein Powder, Boomer Lead Poisoning, and Environmental Woes (12:02–13:35)

• Jessica brings up recent health scares about lead contamination in protein powders.
• The group spirals into theories about boomer lead poisoning via paint and gasoline (“I had never considered unleaded gas was gas without lead... Poisoning and destroying families in cities across the world.” — Chris & Mike, 13:13)
• Brief lamentation about generational trauma and government intervention.

5. The Big News: Billy’s Departure and How Everyone Found Out (16:21–24:50)

• Roy plays a past clip predicting whether the group will stay in touch years down the line, foreshadowing Billy’s exit.
• Chris and others recount the layered drama of who knew, who didn’t, and the “leaky faucet” of office rumors.
• The awkwardness of making the announcement during a meeting is revealed in classic Mystery Crate fashion:
  • “Billy goes, ‘Hey, I have something to say.’ Puts his finger in the air, and he’s like—‘This is my last day.’” — Mike, 22:10
• The group discusses whether Billy’s sense of detachment in workplace friendships is a “bit” or real, with Tony humorously resigning himself to never hearing from Billy again after he leaves.

6. The David Samson Ichiro Gift Conspiracy (27:30–35:46)

• Chris and Billy receive unexpected gifts from David Samson: framed, autographed Ichiro 3,000th hit lineup cards.
• Initial feelings of being specially recognized turn into self-deprecating humor as they discover “everyone” got the same gift:
  • “I had this, like, heartfelt thing with Dan, and I get home... and I have this, like, really thoughtful gift from David Samson… now I’m finding out he just sent everyone on.” — Chris, 34:06
• The group jokes about the limits of sentimentality when multiplied.

7. Legacy, Friendship, Sentimentality (36:00–41:23)

• Open discussion about Billy’s legacy, and what the group—and listeners—will miss most about him.
• Mike and Roy reflect on working together for nearly two decades.
• Jessica remembers her first, awkward interactions and how camaraderie developed (“You were definitely confused about why I was hired. But we became friends anyways.” — Jessica, 43:20).
• Roy gets serious: “Billy’s the only person that’s not like my brother or my sister who said a joke about my dad that made me laugh even though it was dark.” (41:29)
• The show ends with a “go around the room” segment, where each person says goodbye or thanks to Billy.

8. Chaotic Goodbyes, Games, and Last-minute Laughs (54:01–56:07)

• Nostalgia for Mystery Crate classics—like Billy and Lucy’s ongoing games of hangman.
• Chris pokes fun at the average grind of sports media, the monotony of saying goodbye, and accidental social faux pas.
• The final word:
  • “Billy, you’re like one of my favorite people ever, and I’m gonna miss texting you during the show.” — Jessica, 53:35
  • “Thanks, Billy. I don’t want to hear from you.” — Chris, 55:25 (Classic Chris deflection)
  • “Goodbye for now.” — Billy, 56:07

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• Jessica on Pilates: “It's named after a guy whose name was Joseph Pilates.” (01:58)
• Chris on Dancing with the Stars: “Why don’t you lead with—I’m friends with Topanga?” (07:06)
• Mike on DraftKings Reads: “Thank you. Can you do it for us?” (10:12)
• Billy on Creativity: “I'm just following the music. I'm an artist.” (11:48)
• Jessica on Generational Trauma: “There’s theories on the internet that boomers all have lead poisoning from lead paint.” (12:25)
• Chris on Office Rumors: “I call Mike and he’s like, yeah, I know. Dan told me. I was like, okay.” (20:30)
• Billy's Announcement: “Hey, I have something to say. This is my last week. My last day is Friday.” (22:06)
• Chris on Goodbyes: “We just sat there stunned. A bunch of stunned people, like, congratulations—but it’s also mid-lunch.” (23:32)
• On Receiving David Samson’s Ichiro Card:
  Chris: “It was like this very emotional day that involves David Sampson sending me this heartfelt gift just to me—I can't believe it.” (33:00)
  Billy: “I'm not gonna lie. I feel a little less [special]... like, it's still so cool, though.” (34:39)
• Roy’s Sentimentality: "Billy’s the only person that’s not like my brother or my sister who said a joke about my dad that made me laugh even though it was dark." (41:31)
• Jessica’s Goodbye: “Billy, you’re like one of my favorite people ever, and I’m gonna miss texting you during the show because that’s what I was doing on my phone—was always texting you.” (53:35)
• Chris’ Classic Sign-off: “Thanks, Billy, I don’t want to hear from you.” (55:25)
• Billy’s Farewell: “Goodbye for now.” (56:07)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Pilates Origins & Jokes: 01:42–05:00
• Dancing with the Stars, Celebrity Chatter: 05:00–10:00
• DraftKings & Jingle Making: 10:02–12:02
• Lead in Protein & Boomer Issues: 12:02–13:35
• Billy’s Departure & Who Knew What When: 16:21–24:50
• The Awkward Announcement: 22:02–23:32
• David Samson’s Ichiro Card Gifting: 27:30–35:46
• Group Goodbyes to Billy: 54:01–56:07

Tone & Atmosphere

The tone deftly oscillates between lighthearted, chaotic banter and genuine emotion. The hosts’ irreverence about everything from Pilates to protein powder makes way for authentic, sometimes awkward expressions of gratitude and affection. Classic running gags, mutual teasing, and inside jokes abound. Despite the focus on Billy’s leaving, the group’s warmth and shared history shine through.

Final Thoughts

Billy’s last Mystery Crate episode is a celebration of the idiosyncratic alchemy that made him such a vital part of the show. Whether it’s Jessica’s heartfelt admissions, Roy’s dark humor, or Chris deflecting with jokes, each cast member leaves listeners assured that, for all the chaos, there’s real community at the heart of the Mystery Crate. The episode closes as it opened: with laughter trailing off into the unknown—and a promise that this is “goodbye for now.”