Life Kit Podcast Summary
Episode: Techniques to Help You Figure Out How to Make a Big Life Change
Release Date: February 24, 2025
Host: Marielle Segarra
Introduction: Embracing Change
In this episode of Life Kit, host Marielle Segarra delves into the intricacies of making significant life changes. She reflects on her childhood fantasy of a static, unchanging life and contrasts it with the reality that change is the only constant. This perspective sets the stage for a deep exploration of how to navigate and embrace major transitions.
Marielle Segarra [00:18]: "Change is constant, right? Nothing stays the same throughout our lives. We get together and we break up. We get a job, then we leave it. We move to a new city, then move again..."
Expert Insights: Art Markman on Smart Change
Psychology professor Art Markman from the University of Texas at Austin introduces the concept of "Smart Change". He emphasizes the ability to create moments of intentional change and even proposes the idea of a new holiday dedicated to committing to personal transformation.
Art Markman [01:36]: "We can create these moments of change whenever we want."
Markman's strategies lay the foundation for the practical advice that follows, highlighting the importance of planning and environmental adjustments in facilitating change.
Guest Story: Adjua Jimabrempong's Journey
Adjua Jimabrempong, a journalist renowned for her frequent relocations, shares her personal experiences with big life changes. Having moved twelve times as an adult, she discusses the challenges and lessons learned from constantly reinventing her daily life.
Adjua Jimabrempong [03:58]: "There's a lot about starting over that I've learned the hard way."
Her narrative introduces three key experts who provide diverse perspectives on managing significant transitions.
Key Takeaways for Making Big Life Changes
1. Reflect on Your Motivations
Before embarking on a major change, it's crucial to understand why you're making the shift and what you hope to achieve. Victor Saad, founder of the Project Experience Institute, advises taking time to reflect and design personal projects that align with your goals.
Victor Saad [06:37]: "Start by drawing two vertical lines on a piece of paper. On the left side is where you are, and on the right side is where you want to be."
This exercise helps in visualizing the current state versus the desired outcome, facilitating clearer planning.
2. Remember Your Initial Motivation
As anxiety and doubt creep in closer to the change, it's essential to recall what initially motivated you. Art Markman explains the balance between approach motivation (pursuing something desirable) and avoidance motivation (avoiding something undesirable).
Art Markman [10:22]: "Approach motivation is can I pursue a beautiful, wonderful, desirable thing? And avoidance motivation is can I avoid some threat, calamity or catastrophe?"
By keeping sight of the positive reasons for change, you can counterbalance the negative fears that may arise.
3. Make New Behaviors Easy to Engage With
Facilitating the new behavior by making it accessible increases the likelihood of success. For instance, Adjua suggests integrating into a new community by frequenting local spots or engaging in new activities.
Adjua Jimabrempong [13:52]: "Instead of lecturing yourself about staying in too much, think of easy ways to get out of the house."
This approach reduces resistance and builds new, supportive habits.
4. View Life Changes as Evolving Like Software
Art Markman compares life changes to software updates, emphasizing that changes are not permanent and can be adjusted over time. This mindset encourages flexibility and adaptability.
Art Markman [15:44]: "Think about life changes more like software than hardware. And remember that flaws are to be expected."
This perspective allows for continuous improvement and alleviates the pressure of getting everything right from the outset.
5. Trust Your Intuition and Continuously Check In With Yourself
Building trust in your decisions and regularly reassessing your progress ensures that the change remains aligned with your evolving self.
Adjua Jimabrempong [17:18]: "What might feel unimaginable today will become just your new normal."
This takeaway underscores the importance of patience and self-compassion during the transition period.
Practical Techniques: Navigating Emotional Responses
Luke Danny Blue, an advocate for managing big changes, introduces a technique to balance emotional responses by engaging both the go system and the stop system in the brain. This method helps in overcoming the hesitation that often accompanies significant decisions.
Luke Danny Blue [09:29]: "Take whatever the options are one at a time and hold it in your mind... feel into what your body likes, what your reaction is."
By acknowledging and understanding your emotions, you can make more informed and less fear-driven decisions.
Conclusion: Crafting Your Life Story with Curiosity
Wrapping up the episode, Art Markman encourages listeners to approach life with curiosity rather than rigid control. This attitude fosters a more engaging and adaptable life narrative, allowing for unexpected and enriching experiences.
Art Markman [18:34]: "Don't edit your life story in the forward direction. Approach everything with some degree of curiosity."
Marielle Segarra summarizes the key takeaways, reinforcing the episode's practical advice for those contemplating major life changes.
Marielle Segarra [19:22]: "Takeaway 1: Reflect on why you're doing it and what you hope to get from it... Takeaway 5: Trust yourself and don't edit your life in the forward direction."
Takeaways Recap
- Reflect on Your Motivations: Understand why you're making the change and what you aim to achieve.
- Remember Your Initial Motivation: Keep sight of what inspired you to pursue the change amidst rising fears.
- Make New Behaviors Easy: Integrate supportive habits that facilitate your transition.
- View Changes as Evolving: Embrace flexibility, allowing room for adjustments and improvements.
- Trust Your Intuition: Continuously check in with yourself and remain adaptable to new insights.
Additional Resources
For those interested in further exploration, Life Kit offers episodes on budgeting for big life changes and tips on trying something new. Listeners are encouraged to subscribe to the newsletter and engage with the show through feedback and episode suggestions.
Produced by Sylvie Douglas
Visuals Editor: Beck Harlan
Digital Editor: Malika Greeb
Supervising Editor: Megan Keane
Executive Producer: Beth Donovan
Production Team: Andy Tagle, Claire Marie Schneider, Margaret Serino
Engineering Support: Jimmy Keeley, Patrick Murray
Note: This summary excludes advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections to focus solely on the valuable discussions and insights shared during the episode.