Ep. 166 — The Missing Piece

In this episode, I unpack a Type Six Enneathought from the Enneagram Institute and what it really means to go to type 3 and borrow the inner-directedness and self-respect that finally dissolves the chronic insecurity and lack of faith in ourselves.

It's not about becoming someone else. It's about balancing the scales — bringing ourselves back to:

our own authority
the rules we've made up without realizing it
and the way we treat ourselves when no one is watching

In this episode, we explore:

What it actually means to be inner-directed — and how Sixes outsource authority without noticing
The made-up rules we follow like law (and the Facebook group story that helped me catch one of mine)
Why "supposed to" is often just a preference in costume
Self-respect as balance, not bravado — what high self-respect actually looks like day to day
The "Blamey Shameys" — owning mistakes without falling into self-loathing or finger-pointing
Why asking for help is the vulnerable, self-respecting move… not the weak one
The crucial difference between self-respect and defensiveness
A real-time example of working through fear before my husband left for the weekend — and what it made possible

A question to take with you: Where am I outsourcing my own authority right now — and what would it look like to take it back?

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