Podcast
Life Uninhibited - The Enneagram 6 Podcast
Hosted by Kristin Messegee · EN
Podcast for Enneagram Sixes
41episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
Episode #179 - Sixes and Positive Emotions...HOW?!
3d ago00:23:47Tap to summarizeIf you're waiting to feel peaceful after you've solved all the problems... You may be waiting forever. As Sixes, we often believe that calm, joy, and peace are rewards we earn after we've fixed everything that's wrong. But what if those emotions aren't waiting on the other side of certainty? What if they're available now? In this episode, we shift the conversation from difficult emotions to the emotions we long for more of. We explore why our brains naturally focus on threat, why that's not a flaw, and how we can intentionally build new pathways that allow us to notice beauty, support, calm, and joy—even when life is hard. This isn't about pretending everything is okay. It's about learning where to place your attention. In this episode, we explore: Why Sixes don't have to "earn" positive emotions How attention shapes your emotional experience The power of resourcing and practicing beauty Why changing your physical state changes your thinking How to interrupt anxious spirals before solving problems Why calm doesn't come from certainty How to build more moments of peace without changing your circumstances A question to take with you: Where is my attention right now—and is it creating the experience I want? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #178 - OK, But Why Would I do THIS to Myself?
1w ago00:27:04Tap to summarizeLast week, we explored why we experience difficult emotions at all. This week, we're continuing the conversation by looking at three emotions Sixes often spend a tremendous amount of energy trying to avoid: disappointment, fear, and anxiety. What if disappointment isn't something to protect yourself from? What if fear isn't the enemy? And what if anxiety isn't actually solving the problem your brain thinks it's solving? In this episode, we explore how our emotional lives shape so many of the behaviors Sixes know well—lowering expectations, planning for every possibility, overthinking, pessimism, and trying to stay ahead of pain before it ever arrives. The goal isn't to stop having these emotions. The goal is to become safe enough inside yourself that you no longer have to organize your life around avoiding them. In this episode, we discuss: Why disappointment reveals what you genuinely care about How lowering expectations can quietly shrink your life The difference between fear and anxiety Why anxiety loops keep us from deeper emotions How learning to tolerate difficult feelings builds self-trust Why you don't have to outrun your emotions to live an uninhibited life A question to take with you: What feeling am I actually trying to avoid? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #177 - Why Would I Do This To Myself?
2w ago00:31:34Tap to summarizeIf we create our own emotional experience... Why would we ever create emotions that feel so awful? It's such a good question. And one I hear—both from myself and from my clients—all the time. In this episode, we continue our conversation about feelings and explore why difficult emotions aren't mistakes to fix or signs that something has gone wrong. They're part of being human. As Sixes, we often assume that if we feel fear, sadness, anger, or grief, there must be a problem to solve. We immediately begin looking for who caused it, what went wrong, or how to make it stop. But what if those emotions aren't the enemy? What if they're actually revealing what matters most? In this episode, we explore: Why difficult emotions aren't evidence that something is wrong The Six belief that negative emotions always require fixing What sadness, grief, and anger are actually trying to show us Why our brains confuse emotional discomfort with danger The difference between feeling an emotion and acting from it How curiosity creates more freedom than judgment Why learning to let emotions rise and fall builds self-trust This episode isn't about liking uncomfortable feelings. It's about changing your relationship with them. A question to take with you: What if this emotion isn't a problem to solve… but something to understand? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #176 - It Really Is All About Feelings
3w ago00:26:57Tap to summarizeWhat if the thing you've been trying to fix… isn't actually the problem? In this episode, we talk about one of the most life-changing ideas I've ever learned: We create our emotional experience from the inside out. As Sixes, we often believe that if people behaved differently, if circumstances changed, or if life became more certain, we'd finally feel better. But that's not how emotions work. Instead, our minds and bodies are constantly interpreting what's happening around us, creating emotions, assigning meaning, and building stories—all in a matter of seconds. Understanding this doesn't make difficult emotions disappear. It gives us something much more valuable: Choice. In this episode, we explore: Why emotions aren't created by external circumstances How our brains assign meaning to physical sensations The belief that some emotions are "good" and others are "bad" Why Sixes immediately move into fix-it mode when uncomfortable feelings arise The courage it takes to become curious instead of reactive How taking ownership of your emotional life creates freedom A real-life example of how changing the story changed an entire conversation A question to take with you: What story am I telling myself about this feeling—and is there another possibility? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #175 - Unproductive Thinking vs. Productive Thinking
Jul 100:32:40Tap to summarizeOne of the questions I hear most from Sixes is: "How do I know if I'm thinking something through... or just overthinking?" It's a great question. Because as Sixes, our minds are incredibly capable. We anticipate problems, make contingency plans, and often see things others miss. Those are real strengths. But those same strengths can quietly shift into rumination, endless doubt, and anxiety that keeps us stuck. In this episode, I answer a listener question about leadership, decision-making, and the challenge of knowing when thinking is actually helping. We explore: Why overthinking sometimes does contribute to success—and when it doesn't The difference between productive and unproductive thinking Why certainty is never actually available (even though Sixes desperately want it) How discomfort is part of making decisions and building self-trust The questions productive thinking asks—and the ones anxiety keeps repeating Why productive thinking leads to clarity, while unproductive thinking leads to chaos This episode isn't about thinking less. It's about learning to recognize when your mind is helping you... and when it's simply serving fear. A question to take with you: Is my thinking moving me toward clarity… or just keeping me busy? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #174 - Discomfort is Part of the Deal
Jun 2400:23:35Tap to summarize What if discomfort isn't a problem? What if it's just part of being alive? In this episode, I explore one of the biggest traps Sixes fall into: Believing that if we just work harder, do more, know more, prepare more, or get things "right," we'll finally feel safe. But underneath so much of our striving is a quiet belief: "I need to earn safety." "I need to earn approval." "I need to earn enough." And that belief keeps us locked in a cycle of over-functioning, self-pressure, and chronic discomfort. In this episode, we explore: Why Sixes use rigidity to try to feel safe The illusion of "enough" and why it never quite lands How discomfort becomes a signal instead of an enemy Why over-functioning feels so compelling Questions that help bring you back to yourself The difference between certainty and clarity Learning to tolerate discomfort instead of organizing your life around avoiding it A question to take with you: What if I stopped trying to earn what is already mine? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #173 - Self Resistance and Sixes
Jun 1700:34:12Tap to summarizeWhat if the thing causing the most suffering isn't the anxiety, fear, frustration, or self-doubt? What if it's your resistance to them? In this episode, I unpack one of the biggest obstacles Sixes face: The constant internal battle with ourselves. We resist our feelings. We resist our reactions. We resist our humanity. And then we wonder why we feel stuck. Using stories from a recent family vacation, I explore how real change happens when we stop trying to force ourselves into being different and start becoming curious about what is actually happening. In this episode, we explore: Why resistance creates more suffering than the original feeling The difference between awareness and judgment Why your emotions don't need to be fixed, analyzed, or justified How self-judgment keeps Sixes stuck in old patterns Why curiosity creates change and shame does not The difference between your first reaction and your second response Where your real power and agency actually live This episode is an invitation to stop fighting yourself. Because the moment you stop resisting yourself... you finally have the space to change. A question to take with you: What part of my experience am I fighting right now? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #172 - Head Heart Body
Jun 1000:25:56Tap to summarizeWhat if the thing Sixes are actually looking for isn't certainty? What if it's alignment? In this episode, I share a new framework I've been developing for understanding growth and healing as a Type Six through the lens of the three centers of intelligence: 🧠 Head ❤️ Heart 💪 Body I explore why self-compassion isn't just a nice idea or another thing we "should" do. It's foundational. Because when we learn how to create a different relationship with ourselves, something remarkable begins to happen: Our head, heart, and body start working together instead of against each other. In this episode, we explore: Why self-compassion is heart-centered work How Sixes can use their minds intentionally instead of reactively Why trusting yourself begins with how you treat yourself The connection between self-compassion and self-trust Why Sixes struggle to trust their instincts and inner knowing How alignment between head, heart, and body creates internal authority This episode is really about one thing: Learning how to become someone you trust. A question to take with you: What would change if I treated myself like someone worthy of trust? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #171 - What is in the Light?
Jun 300:29:47Tap to summarizeWe've spent the last several episodes talking about the shadow. The parts of ourselves we don't see. The parts we reject. The parts we push away. But what about the opposite? What lives in the light? In this episode, I explore the traits and identities that many Sixes willingly claim as part of who they are: ✨ loyal ✨ responsible ✨ prepared ✨ helpful ✨ truthful ✨ reliable ✨ the questioner ✨ the protector These are real strengths. But they're not the whole story. Because when these qualities become identities instead of abilities, they can become rigid, exhausting, and limiting. In this episode, we explore: Why Sixes often build identity around usefulness and reliability The difference between who you are and what you're good at How loyalty, responsibility, and vigilance can become self-concepts Why "the questioner" isn't the same as inner authority The hidden cost of defining yourself by what you do for others What it means to soften your identity and become more whole This isn't about giving up your strengths. It's about holding them lightly. A question to take with you: Who would I be if I stopped defining myself by what I do for others? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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Episode #170 - Shadow Work, Part 3
May 2700:28:10Tap to summarize In this final episode of the shadow work series, we get very specific about what may actually live in the shadow of Type Six. And yes… some of it may sting. Because shadow work is not about finding “bad” things about yourself. It’s about discovering the parts of yourself you pushed away in order to feel safe, accepted, supported, or secure. In this episode, we explore: Why Sixes struggle so deeply with uncertainty The hidden relationship many Sixes have with aggression and anger Why personal authority and self-trust often live in the shadow The discomfort around power, control, neediness, and vulnerability How self-prioritization can feel “dangerous” to Sixes Why certainty-seeking creates unconscious behavior patterns And how curiosity + self-acceptance create real integration This work isn’t about fixing yourself. It’s about becoming more whole. Because the parts of ourselves we refuse to see… often end up running the show. A question to take with you: What part of myself still feels too dangerous to fully own? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching
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