Keep a Good Marriage From Drifting | Love Killers: Part 3

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Keep a Good Marriage From Drifting | Love Killers: Part 3"

Podcast: Life.Church with Craig Groeschel
Date: May 17, 2026
Episode Theme:
This episode explores how marriages—even those built on faith—can slowly drift apart due to spiritual apathy and busyness, and outlines actionable steps grounded in biblical teaching to re-center marriages around Christ instead of just identifying as a "Christian couple." Through practical stories, biblical references, and a call to action, Pastor Craig and Amy emphasize the importance of not just believing in God, but intentionally building all of life—including marriage and family—around Jesus as the center.

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Main Ideas & Purpose

• Difference Between Christian Marriage and Christ-Centered Marriage:
  Many couples identify as Christians, but making Christ the true center of the marriage requires intentional daily actions and priorities.
• How Spiritual Drift Happens:
  Drift is often slow and unintentional, caused by the gradual exclusion of God from the center as life gets busy or routine.
• Practical Steps for Re-centering:
  Returning to "first love" practices—especially regular prayer together—can restore intimacy, spiritual unity, and direction.
• Biblical Framework:
  Drawing from Haggai (Old Testament) and Jesus’ message to the church in Ephesus (Revelation), the episode examines how God's priorities often become afterthoughts, both historically and in modern life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Recognizing the Problem: Spiritual Drift in Marriage

• Busyness vs. Closeness
  • Many couples manage logistics and day-to-day tasks together but lack real closeness and spiritual connection ([01:01]).
  • “You're busy together, just not close. It's not your fault. It's kind of the way culture is.” — Amy ([01:01])
• Leaks in the Relationship
  • Marriages may look stable to outsiders but feel something is missing inside—connection and intimacy “leak” away.
  • Powerful metaphor from Haggai: “You’re earning, but you’re putting them in pockets with holes in it” ([03:33])
• Causes of Drift
  • Most people don’t intend to leave God out; life simply crowds Him out; apathy doesn’t look like rebellion, just routine ([07:13]–[08:21]).
  • “Spiritual apathy generally doesn’t look like rebellion. ... It looks like a normal week.” — Pastor Craig ([08:18])

2. The Root: Being Christ-Centered vs. Merely Christian

• Christian Couple vs. Christ-Centered Couple
  • Christians may believe in God and attend church, but a Christ-centered marriage orients every part of life around Him ([02:04]).
  • “A Christian couple believes in God, but a Christ-centered couple builds their life around Him. There’s a difference between just believing in Him and saying that Jesus is the center of our lives.” — Pastor Craig ([02:04])
• Illustration from Haggai (5:33)
  • Biblical story as an analogy: Israelites started with God as their focus, but as life happened, other things crept in ([05:33]–[07:13]).

3. Vulnerability: Personal Story

• Pastor Craig & Amy’s Experience: Not Praying About Major Life Decisions
  • Despite being faith leaders, even they sometimes forgot to pray about important decisions—e.g., how many children to have ([11:03]–[12:58]).
  • “We hadn’t prayed about it one time. ... We didn’t ask God for His wisdom, His direction, His will for one of the most important decisions we would ever make.” — Amy ([11:58])

4. Fixing the Leak: Practical Biblical Instructions

• Return To “First Love” Practices (Revelation 2)
  • Jesus challenges the Ephesian church: despite hard work, they lost their “first love.”
  • “Consider how far you've fallen and repent...do the things you did at first.” ([16:27])
  • Repentance isn’t about feeling bad; it’s about returning to fruitful, faith-filled habits.
• Action Steps from Haggai
  • “Give careful thought to your ways. Go up to the mountain and bring down the timber and build my house.” ([17:59])
  • Ask: What currently gets your best? Your work, kids, appearance, or Jesus? ([18:09])

5. Keystone Habit: Praying Together

• Statistical Impact
  • Gallup study reference: Only 4% of Christian couples pray together regularly, but among those, fewer than 1% get divorced ([20:32]).
• Addressing Hesitations
  • Praying together can feel intimate or awkward but is more transformative than any other habit.
  • “If you get naked together, you could probably pray together.” — Amy ([20:17])
• How To Start ([22:57])
  • Three rules: Keep it short, keep it consistent, and if you miss one day, don’t miss two.
  • “The goal is not to pray long. The goal is to pray faithfully and watch what God does. 30 seconds. Start there.” — Amy ([22:57])

6. Broader Applications: Singles & Dating

• Don’t Expect A Christ-Centered Marriage From Spiritual Leftovers
  • If God isn’t central in your life now, a relationship won’t fix that ([24:20]).
  • “Don’t expect a Christ-centered marriage in the future if you're only getting spiritual leftovers today.” — Amy ([25:13])
• Dating Advice
  • Evaluate prospective partners by what you see them doing spiritually, not just what they say ([24:50]–[25:19]).

7. Ultimate Call: Seek First God's Kingdom

• “Seek first God's kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well.” — Pastor Craig, quoting Matthew 6:33 ([25:33])
• The promise isn’t for an easy life, but right priorities and divinely-directed steps.

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Memorable Quotes & Notable Moments

• On spiritual apathy ([08:21]):
  “Spiritual apathy looks like a normal week.” — Pastor Craig
• On drifting from God ([07:59]):
  “You have no idea the whole time that you're drifting...and you look up for your family and they're way over there. They didn't move. You did—a little bit at a time.” — Pastor Craig
• On praying together ([20:17]):
  “I know you're freaking out...that's too intimate. Like, you get naked together, you could probably pray together.” — Amy
• On relationship “leaks” ([14:14]):
  “It's not because you’re not putting something in. It’s because what you’re putting in is leaking out. There’s a hole. ... The hole is a God-shaped void that only He can fill.” — Pastor Craig
• On commitment ([30:38]):
  “If you're married, you’re praying together once a day. If you’re not married, pray...with someone else for seven days.” — Amy

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Key Timestamps

• 00:00–03:28: Introduction; busy but not close; beginning to frame the difference between Christian and Christ-centered marriages.
• 03:30–05:33: Biblical background—Haggai’s message; metaphor for leaking relationships.
• 07:13–09:18: Life crowding out God’s priority; spiritual drift analogy.
• 11:03–12:58: Pastor Craig & Amy’s story about major decisions without prayer.
• 15:03–17:59: Jesus’ letter to Ephesus, “return to first love”; actionable faith habits.
• 18:09–20:32: How to give God your “first and best”; keystone habit introduction.
• 20:32–23:43: The transformative power of daily praying together; Gallup study stats.
• 23:43–26:32: Practical advice for singles and engaged couples—build Christ-centered habits now.
• 26:32–29:58: Vision for a Christ-centered home; what it looks like for children and lasting legacy.
• 30:33–31:00: Weekly challenge—pray together daily for seven days.
• 32:54–34:44: Invitation for listeners to fully surrender to Christ, not just identify as Christian.

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Action Steps & Final Invitation

• For Married Couples:
  Commit to pray together every day for at least seven days—start short, stay consistent. Let this habit begin to re-center your home on Christ.
• For Singles/Dating:
  Seek God first in your life now, and evaluate your relationships for spiritual fruit, not just spiritual talk.
• General Call:
  Don't let Christ be a guest in your marriage or life—let Him be the true center. Go back to your first love or start building now.

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Tone & Style

Pastor Craig and Amy use humor, personal vulnerability, biblical teaching, and practical steps. Their style is warm, direct, and motivational, blending sincerity with lighthearted moments to make spiritual truths relatable and actionable.

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Summary Recap:
The episode is a heartfelt call to move from spiritual “autopilot” to intentional Christ-centered living—especially in marriage. Whether you’re married, single, or dating, the invitation is the same: build your life around Jesus. Start (or restart) with simple, daily habits—especially prayer together—that can transform your relationship from just looking good on the outside to having Spirit-filled unity, intimacy, and purpose at its heart.

Transcript

[Pastor Craig]

Let me see a show of hands today. If you are not married and you hope to be married one day, would you raise your hands? Just raise them up. Leave them up if you will. Leave them up. Leave them up.

[Amy]

Leave them high. Scan the room for a minute.

[Pastor Craig]

Just look around, look around, look around, look around.

[Amy]

There's a lot of potential here.

[Pastor Craig]

Come on. Just saying. Look around.

[Amy]

Hey. If you make eye contact with somebody whose hand is raised and you feel the Holy Ghost tingle, congratulations, we'll do your wedding. Hey, I, I'm not joking. I actually did that before the Global Leadership Summit. Let me introduce you to Nathan and Natalie. Nathan looked across the room, saw Natalie, felt the Holy Ghost tingle, said, would you like to lead with me?

[Pastor Craig]

And they've been married since 2021. I'm not kidding today.

[Amy]

Just, you never know what might happen if you're open to what God might say. Now, to those of you that are

[Pastor Craig]

married, raise your hand. Raise your hand. You are married.

[Amy]

Okay, most of you, what I know about you is you are probably committed

[Pastor Craig]

to, to your marriage. You probably love each other. And you're probably like most people, you're

[Amy]

trying your best in this crazy world to like manage your schedules, pay the bills, keep the kids alive. And most of you, you are busy together, just not close. That's our world today. It's not your fault. It's kind of the way culture is. You're busy together, and because you're so busy together, you're often distracted from the

[Pastor Craig]

things that matter most. You're busy, but just not close.

[Amy]

And on paper. A lot of times, if you looked at your relationships like it looks solid on paper, but it still feels like something is leaking.

[Pastor Craig]

Connection might feel like it's leaking, intimacy might feel like it's leaking. From the outside it looks okay, but when you look up close, it feels like something is leaking.

[Amy]

And what I know about most of

[Pastor Craig]

you, not all of you, if you

[Amy]

don't believe in God, you're absolutely welcome here. But most of you probably do believe

[Pastor Craig]

in God and you wouldn't be here

[Amy]

consistently if you didn't. And so most of you, if you are married and you believe in God, you probably assume that you have a pretty good Christian marriage, like you're a pretty decent Christian Christian couple. But I want to show you today there is a big difference between being a Christian couple and having a Christ centered marriage. A big, big difference. In fact, I describe it this way. A Christian couple believes in God, but a Christ centered couple builds their life around him. There's a difference between just believing in him. Yeah, I believe in him. You believe in him. We go to church occasionally and saying that Jesus is the center of of our lives, the cornerstone of our family and we design our entire lives including our kids direction and priorities around him. And the problem for most people today, most so called Christians is that you don't have bad beliefs. The problem is that you just haven't built your marriage around what you believe. We could say that God is like a part of your life, but maybe not the true center of your marriage. And it's not because you pushed him out. It's because life just slowly filled that space. So we're look today in the Old

[Pastor Craig]

Testament at an unusual text.

[Amy]

We're gonna look at the prophet Haggai.

[Pastor Craig]

If you wanna look in your bible,

[Amy]

you might need to go to the table of contents to find Haggai or better yet, pull out your Bible app and type it in. It's very, very easy that way. It's an Old Testament prophet that not a lot of people preach on. But there is a portion of this book that describes exactly what we're talking about. Haggai, chapter one, verse two says this. The people are saying the time has not yet come to rebuild the house of the Lord. So the Lord sent this message through the prophet Haggai and he asked the people, why are you living in luxurious houses while my house lies in ruins? Look at what is happening to you. God says, he says you have planted much but harvest little. You eat, but you're not satisfied. You drink and are still thirsty. You put on clothes but cannot keep warm. Your wages disappear as though you are putting them in pockets filled with holes. Look at all the metaphors we see here. You plant, but you don't harvest. You eat, but you're not satisfied. You drink, but you're still thirsty. You put on clothes but you're not warm. You earn money but you put it in pockets like there's holes in it. And these images are really good. Picture what so many relationships feel like. You keep pouring in, but whatever you put in seems to drain out. And it's not because you don't care. And it's not because you're not trying, but because the center is missing because there's a leak in the relationship. Now it's important to understand who the prophet was talking to when he's saying like you've forgotten about the priority of the house of God. For context, the evil emperor, the evil empire Babylon had conquered Israel and and

[Pastor Craig]

taken the whole nation into exile.

[Amy]

These people he's talking to. They were the ones that actually came back. They were the ones you would say are, like, most committed. They were like you all graduation weekend and you're still in church.

[Pastor Craig]

Okay, that's pretty amazing.

[Amy]

They were faithful, and they said, we're the ones that are going home now. What they did is what a lot of us do. They started out strong. They said, we're gonna worship God and we're gonna build his house and we're gonna prioritize God. And then sud. Life happened. Anybody ever get there? You got really, really good intentions. And then life just knocks you off your priorities. And what's interesting is they didn't stop loving God. They just slowly stopped building their life around him. And you can kind of almost imagine I'm just. I'm making this up. But you're gonna kind of imagine they're like.

[Pastor Craig]

They get married and get a little

[Amy]

bit distracted, and then they pop out a kid. Boom. And another one, Boom. Three kids in diapers, and they're a little bit more distracted. And then they get the mortgage payment and the yard, and one of them does yoga class, the other one does golf lessons. And then somebody puts little Ben in the traveling Judean team, right? And now they're gone every single weekend. Life happened. They didn't rebel against God. They didn't reject God.

[Pastor Craig]

They just got busy.

[Amy]

And slowly, God's house, what he called them to rebuild it went from their very first calling to an afterthought. And if it sounds familiar, it's because it really is in our culture today.

[Pastor Craig]

And some of you would say, like, that's exactly me.

[Amy]

That's us. What'd you do? Well, you built everything that you wanted,

[Pastor Craig]

but you forgot the one who holds it all together. And this is how spiritual drift happens. You ever been to the beach and you're playing in the water and you're having fun, and you're just having fun. You have no idea the whole time that you're drifting and you're drifting and you're drifting, and you look up for

[Amy]

your family, and they're way over there. What happened?

[Pastor Craig]

They didn't move. You did a little bit at a time. Spiritual apathy. And this is, like, rampant in our churches today. And I would say this spiritual apathy generally doesn't look like rebellion. And what I would call cultural Christians,

[Amy]

you know, we're Christians, we believe in God and such.

[Pastor Craig]

Doesn't look like rebellion.

[Amy]

Spiritual apathy looks like a normal week.

[Pastor Craig]

Just a normal week. Like two people who love God individually. I love God, and she loves God, but we just don't pursue him together. It looks like people who go to church on the weekends, but don't really bring God into their everyday, normal conversations during the week. It looks like a family who works

[Amy]

really hard to know each other's schedules. Get in there and go here and

[Pastor Craig]

go there and go there, but not knowing where each other is spiritually along the way.

[Amy]

It looks like working really hard to

[Pastor Craig]

make good decisions about, you know, what are we gonna do financially, and where are we gonna go on vacation, can we afford it? And where are we gonna go and what are we gonna do with the education of our kids, and where are we gonna live?

[Amy]

But never stopping to invite the one who joined you together to be the Lord, or the one who actually directs

[Pastor Craig]

the decisions that you're making. It looks like calling yourself a Christian

[Amy]

couple and knowing that you should probably

[Pastor Craig]

pray together at some point, but not

[Amy]

doing it, and not because you don't think it's important, but because the kids

[Pastor Craig]

need baths and the dishes need doing, and you're tired, and he's got something on his mind, and you're not sure what that is or even if you're up to it because you know what it is, and you're tired, and so is he, and so he's not sure. And there you are. You guys are so quiet. Like, is he talking about, Nah. No, I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, I'm in a relatively good mood this week.

[Amy]

Yeah, really good mood.

[Pastor Craig]

High risk. This is moderate risk. Yes, I was talking about that.

[Amy]

So what happens? Life happens. Like, we believe in God, but we just get busy. Cause I don't know any of you. Like, if you genuinely want to please God, nobody ever says, hey, today is the day we're leaving God out of our marriage. Today's the day we're gonna claim him but abandon Him. Nobody does that. But what happens? Drift happens. Spiritual apathy happens. One Tuesday at a time, and you

[Pastor Craig]

don't even plan it.

[Amy]

So before you're sitting there going, well, we suck.

[Pastor Craig]

Wish we were like Pastor Craig and Amy. I'll tell you, we suck, too. Okay? Relatively good mood, moderate risk. So just work with me.

[Amy]

I'll tell you a story that happened. Amy came from a family.

[Pastor Craig]

She had one brother, so there were two kids. I came from a family, had one sister, so there were two kids.

[Amy]

So when we were getting married, beyond a shadow of a doubt, we knew we were gonna have two kids.

[Pastor Craig]

Two kids. Two kids.

[Amy]

A boy and a girl. And we're gonna be done. Well, we had a girl and a girl.

[Pastor Craig]

This was Katie and Mandy.

[Amy]

But we had two kids and we were done.

[Pastor Craig]

Two kids and done God's will and done.

[Amy]

Two kids and done. Except Amy didn't really wanna be on birth control. Two kids. But my wife's not on birth control. Now, I'm not a genius, but where I come from, that means you're not done. Okay? And so we debated it and she

[Pastor Craig]

was more emotional in her approach and

[Amy]

I was more logical in my approach. And we were both wrong back and forth. I'm talking like probably three months or so. Well, you can't do that. We can't do this. We can just trust God. Well, how many you want to have? On and on and on and on. And what I realized is we hadn't prayed about it one time. Pastor Craig, your fearless leader, your shepherd who will lead you into green pastures and teach you to pray and seek God, who did not do it about having more kids. We didn't ask God for his wisdom, his direction, his will for one of the most important decisions that we will ever make.

[Pastor Craig]

So we prayed about it and God answered.

[Amy]

And we have six kids, a basketball team and a sub right there. Six kids. Some of you listen to me. Some of you can relate. Not to the six kids, but to not praying about important stuff that God should have a voice in if you

[Pastor Craig]

truly want to be under his lordship.

[Amy]

You didn't reject him.

[Pastor Craig]

He just did what we did. You got busy, you left him out, started doing things on your own. Haggai, the prophet, he gives us several pictures of this. He says, you plant, but you don't harvest.

[Amy]

You eat, but you're not satisfied.

[Pastor Craig]

You're earning, but you're putting them in pockets with holes in it.

[Amy]

Same feeling, but different words. You keep putting something into your relationship, but nothing stays.

[Pastor Craig]

And some of you can relate right

[Amy]

now because you do care and you're

[Pastor Craig]

both trying, but it's still not working.

[Amy]

And it's not because you're not putting something in.

[Pastor Craig]

It's because what you're putting in is leaking out. There's a hole. And I'm gonna tell you right now, the hole is not your schedule. It's not the season you're in. It's not that your spouse is the problem. The hole is a God shaped void

[Amy]

that only he can fill.

[Pastor Craig]

And there is a big difference between calling yourself a Christian couple and living a Christ centered life built on on

[Amy]

the truth of his word, directed by His Spirit, seeking him to do His

[Pastor Craig]

Will on earth as it is in heaven without him in the center, there is a hole. And the principle is this. If you don't fix the hole, it

[Amy]

doesn't matter how much you pour in,

[Pastor Craig]

your marriage will always leak. So that's a long setup to the problem. What does God's word say to do? How do we fix it? How do we put him back in the center? Well, Jesus in Revelation wrote a powerful letter to the church at Ephesus, who, in many ways, they were kind of

[Amy]

like a model church.

[Pastor Craig]

They were doing so many things right on paper, they looked amazing.

[Amy]

But he said, I had this one thing, one thing, one thing against you. And here's what he said. He said in Revelation 2 and 2, he said, I know your deeds, your hard work, and your perseverance. In other words, I know you're doing a lot of the right things, and I know you're trying really, really hard, yet I hold this against you. He says, you have forsaken the love you had at first. He goes on to say, consider how far you've fallen and repent, turn back, go back to it, repent and do the things that you did. At first. He's saying, hey, remember where you were and consider how far you've fallen. He doesn't say, consider how bad you are, but consider how far you drifted. Because most of you, you didn't plan to drift. You just actually did one little decision at a time, and now you ended

[Pastor Craig]

up somewhere that you never, ever planned to be. If you had a life centered around him at any time, not everybody did. But if you did go back and do what you did before, like, repent and do those things again, like, if

[Amy]

you used to pray together and you were close to Jesus, then he was, then pray together again. If you used to, like, talk about the things of God, like, what's God showing you? And you talk about what's in the Word, and you talk about God at the table around your kids. If you did that before, it was working then, then do it again. If you used to try to make decisions, and what do you think God would think about this? And what does His Word say about this? And. And you go to your life group and you say, would you all pray for us, for wisdom? We're trying to make a decision together, and we're seeking the will of God. If you did that before and it was working before, then do that again. And if you never had it, then you got a great opportunity. Haggai says, start building it. If you didn't have it before, start building it. Now. Here's the way he said it. He said, give careful thought to your ways. Like, just think about it, use your brain, think. Give careful thought to your ways. Go up to the mountain and bring down the timber and build my house. If God wants you to build the house, go up to the mountain, bring

[Pastor Craig]

down the timber and build my house. Think about it, do what works to build the house.

[Amy]

Take pleasure in it and be honored. I love it.

[Pastor Craig]

His word just says, give careful thought ways, not try harder, not do more. Just think about what works and do what works. Think about it. And I would just ask you this, like, what gets your first and best? Think about it. What gets your first and best? For some of you, it's easy. Them, that one, that one and that one. The kids think it's your first and your best. For some of you, it would be your career, your all in your bank account, your appearance, whatever it is. Give careful thought to where your mind drifts, to where you put your time. If you want to call yourself a Christian couple, you can blend in and kind of look like the rest. If you wanna be Christ centered, think about it and put your first and your best to him and build your life around him. How do we do it? Like, where do we start? Lots of good ideas. Be in the presence of God together at church. You're doing that now. Very good. Be in Christian community together. Commit your life group. Very, very good. Use your gifts somewhere. Very, very good. Read the word very good. All those things, lots of things I could give you. I'm gonna give you one that has the biggest return in marriages. If there is one thing you can do, one habit, just one, that kind of becomes like a keystone habit, something that propels other good things. If there is one thing above anything

[Amy]

else, according to studies and just my

[Pastor Craig]

experience, I would tell you that any

[Amy]

couple can do, and you can do it today. Now, easy is simply pray together. Pray together. Just like pray together. I know you're freaking out going, I don't know, that's too intimate. Like you get naked together, you could probably pray together.

[Pastor Craig]

Just saying, I mean that's.

[Amy]

Wasn't planning on saying that. But you, you know, if you're married, I hope you get naked together sometimes or often, whatever your rhythm is.

[Pastor Craig]

I'm not gonna judge, but I hope you do.

[Amy]

If you can do that, you can probably pray together. Can I get an amen somewhere? If that's kind of intimate, yes. Praying together. In fact, a Gallup study found. Get ready for this. What percentage Of Christian couples pray together, the answer is, are you ready? Only 4%. Only 4 in 100 Christian couples pray together, together, regularly. Of those 4% that pray together regularly, of those who do, fewer than 1% divorce, according to a Gallup study that you can look up. I'm gonna tell you right now, I do not know any other single habit in any area of my life that has that kind of return. And you can do it now, immediately. And you don't have to be great at it. You can just, like, just start. You don't have to be pastoral. You can just try. And I get it, and this will surprise some of you, but Amy and I didn't pray regularly together in the early years. Why? Because I was dumb. I thought, I'm doing it all day at work. I don't want to do it at home. And so I didn't. And secondly, because she takes a really long time to get warmed up. She really does. Like, let's pray. And there's a lot of stuff that

[Pastor Craig]

goes into it, and I'm kind of

[Amy]

like, let's get it done. And she's like, let's make it last. And anyway, yeah, you pray together. Just. That sounded weird. Hey, I moved on from that.

[Pastor Craig]

I moved on.

[Amy]

Come on, y'.

[Pastor Craig]

All. Medium mood, moderate risk.

[Amy]

And here's what's amazing, is when you're

[Pastor Craig]

praying with somebody, it's hard to be mad at them.

[Amy]

You kind of gotta work through some things.

[Pastor Craig]

You're gonna pray with them.

[Amy]

When you're praying daily with someone, it's hard to drift spiritually from then when you're joining yourself spiritually, when you're praying daily with your spouse. Like, it's hard to let spiritual apathy win. Whenever you're asking God to be the center of not just your marriage, but of your family and your children's lives, I'm gonna tell you right now, it does not have to be 30 minutes a day. It doesn't have to be pastoral. It literally can be really, really short. I've taught this before.

[Pastor Craig]

I'm gonna say it again.

[Amy]

The three rules of praying effectively is keep it short, keep it consistent. If you miss one day, don't miss two. Keep it short. Do it every day. If you miss a day, don't skip two. Now, some of you can say, but, Craig, you have to keep it short. No, that's just part of my strategy. Like, just start short. You don't have to stay that way. But if I say, like, pray long, you're not going to do that. So just keep it short. Start there. And what's going to happen is when you start praying and you get a little bit more comfortable about it, you might pray a little bit longer. But the goal is not to pray long. The goal is to pray faithfully and watch what God does. 30 seconds. Start there. 30 seconds. God just bless my spouse, bless their children, guide our steps today.

[Pastor Craig]

Give us wisdom to love you and serve you well in Jesus name.

[Amy]

Amen.

[Pastor Craig]

And go.

[Amy]

Ours is like right before I leave for work. Yours might be right before bed.

[Pastor Craig]

I'd find a consistent time and I would do it every single day. Keep it short if it grows longer.

[Amy]

Good.

[Pastor Craig]

Keep it consistent.

[Amy]

If you miss one day, you probably will.

[Pastor Craig]

Don't miss two. A very short time of seeking God. We're not just a Christian couple. We want to be Christ centered. So we talk to the one we want to center our lives around every single day.

[Amy]

That could change your marriage more than anything you do all year long.

[Pastor Craig]

You say, but okay, I'm not married, I'm sitting here. How does this apply to me? It really, really matters to you. Because if God is not the center of your life right now, a relationship with someone is not gonna put him there. And I wanna talk to those of you. If you're dating someone right now, super important. If you're dating someone and you're believing God for a Christ centered marriage in the future, pay attention to what you see in the person you're dating.

[Amy]

Not just what they say, but what

[Pastor Craig]

you see, how they behave. If they claim to be a Christian, but they're not pursuing Jesus, they're not reading His Word, they're not fighting to be in the house of God together, hearing His Word together. They're not serving anywhere. They're not asking you spiritual questions and trying to help you become more like Jesus.

[Amy]

If you're not seeing that, that's not just apathy.

[Pastor Craig]

That is a preview of where your

[Amy]

relationship will go unless God does something big in that person. I told my kids this. Don't expect a Christ centered marriage in the future if you're only getting spiritual leftovers today. What do we do? What do we do?

[Pastor Craig]

Jesus said it.

[Amy]

He said it clearly in Matthew 6:33. He said, but seek first. Seek first. First above anything else. Seek first God's kingdom and his righteousness. And then all these things will be given to you as well. Seek first. First the kingdom of God and his righteousness. We seek first God. I'm pursuing you, God, I want to know you. God, I want to glorify you. I'M seeking your righteousness. If you're dating and you're living a sinful lifestyle, you don't build a Christ centered marriage in the future on a lifestyle of sin today. No, you pursue righteousness today. You want to live in a way that's pleasing to God today. You seek him first and then he says, all these things will be added unto you. This isn't a promise for an easy life. It's when you seek him first. Your other priorities for fall into place. He directs your steps and you get to live in his will. Seek him first. Seek him first. Seek him first. Seek him first. One thing, one thing. If you do one thing, you might say, hey, we're gonna pray together and

[Pastor Craig]

seek him through prayer.

[Amy]

Now, what I know is some of

[Pastor Craig]

you are trying right now and you care and you really do love God. And something's leaking. You're wondering, like, why in the world does this not feel like enough? I want you to hear me.

[Amy]

I'm not gonna tell you to go do more.

[Pastor Craig]

What I'm do is if you've ever had it, I'm gonna tell you to go back and do what you did before. The Bible says repent and do the things you did at first.

[Amy]

Re means turn, pent means highest. You turn from the lower ways of this world, from the temptations of the evil one, and you turn back to the things that bring you close to God. If you've never ever had it, consider.

[Pastor Craig]

Think about it. Go up the mountain, bring the wood, come down and do what it takes to build the house of God. Go back to your first love.

[Amy]

Whenever God wasn't just someone that you

[Pastor Craig]

claim to believe in, but someone that you loved and pursued and built your life around. If there's a leak, I'm gonna tell you right now, pastorally speaking, there's a leak. In most homes, if there's a leak, let me tell you about the hole, about what's missing. God didn't just identify it. He came to fill that hole. He left heaven and came to earth in the person of His Son, Jesus. And who did he come for? He came for the broken. And he didn't come to condemn, but he came to heal and restore that which was lost. When I was far away, he came for me. When you were dead in your sins, he came for you. And he's the only one who can fill what's empty. And so if you claim Jesus, you say, we're a Christian marriage. I'm just asking you in your face if Jesus is truly the Lord of Your life. Why is he a guest in your marriage? Don't make him a guest. If you say he's first, but he's not first on your calendar, consider your ways. If you say he's first, but you can't see him in your evenings, consider your ways. If you say he's first but you don't seek him for the decisions that you make, consider your ways. What I want you to do is just take a moment and imagine with me a marriage that's centered around him, that when you pray, you pray together and you seek him and you know he hears your prayers and directs your steps.

[Amy]

And you know that your family isn't just claiming him, but is built on Him. And when you make decisions, you ask him to be the one that directs your decisions and that they would be pleasing to him and all that you do. And when your kids look at you and they see two people who truly love God, and they know that you love God first and they know that you love each other and they've seen you pray together and they've seen you seek His Word together. And one day when they get married, they want what you have because they've seen it. Not a Christian couple, but a Christ centered home. And there's something about that that lands in their spirits. And they say, I want that. This is not a Pinterest post. This is not something that goes on a dream board. This is marriage as God designed it to be. So what do you do? Come on, church.

[Pastor Craig]

Give careful way to your thoughts. Build his house. Seek him first, his righteousness, his kingdom. And then all these things will be added unto you. Holy Spirit, we pray that you would

[Amy]

do what only you could do.

[Pastor Craig]

God, pierce our hearts today. Convict us, God, when we've drifted and left you out. Do what only you can do. As you're praying today at all of our churches, if you're those of you who are Jesus followers, I want to talk to those of you who would say, yes, I am a disciple of Jesus. Whether you're married or not, I'm going

[Amy]

to ask, would you just commit this week, seven days.

[Pastor Craig]

If you're married, you're praying together once a day.

[Amy]

If you're not married, pray. You may even get your life group. You may get two or three people and just pray on the phone together, FaceTime together, pray at work together, pray with someone else for seven days.

[Pastor Craig]

I'm gonna ask you to think about it.

[Amy]

I don't want you to make an emotional decision.

[Pastor Craig]

Keep it short, keep it simple.

[Amy]

If you miss a Day, don't miss

[Pastor Craig]

two and just make that commitment seven days this week. If you're married, you're gonna seek God with your spouse, someone else, you're not married, you're gonna seek God with a friend and you're gonna pray together with someone for seven days and just see what God does when you seek him with others. First, if you'll make that commitment today, all of our churches, would you raise your hand right now? Raise your hand. Praise God for you online. Just type in the comment section. I commit to pray with someone for seven days. Father, I thank you ahead of time for what you're gonna do. First of all, that you're gonna hear the cries of our hearts, God, that when we pray together, two or three on earth, agreeing on anything, that you hear the prayers and you move on behalf of those who are seeking you. So we thank you for the answered prayers that we're gonna see. And even more than the answer prayers, God, we thank you for the spiritual unity that's gonna be forged as we lock the spiritual enemy out of our lives, our families, our relationships and God. I just pray that we wouldn't be just a so called Christian couple, but we would create families and friendships that are truly centered on your son, Jesus. God work in everyone who commits to pray this week and we thank you in advance for all that you're gonna do. As you keep praying today, I wanna talk to those of you who like, if you look at your life, you just have to say, Jesus is not first, not on your calendar, not in your finances, not in your friendships, not in your marriage, not in your parenting. And let me tell you what God did for you. He went first. He did. The Bible says that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. God took the first step. Scripture says that God so loved the world that he sent his one and only son, Jesus. Who is Jesus? Jesus is the Son of God. He's called the Lamb of God, who was the perfect sacrifice, who died on a cross for the forgiveness of our sins. Jesus was without sin and died as our replacement, our sacrifice. And God raised him from the dead so that anyone listen to me, and this includes you, no matter what we've done, anyone who calls on his name would be forgiven, would be made new, and would be changed forever. There are those of you, there are

[Amy]

some of you who are like me.

[Pastor Craig]

You were raised in the church and called yourself a Christian. You can call yourself a duck. If you can't fly, you're not a duck. Call yourself a Christian if you're not serving Jesus first. Call yourself whatever you want. There should be spiritual fruit. There should be evidence. If you recognize there's not. Today is the day of your salvation. What we're gonna do is we're just gonna repent. That means we're gonna turn away from our sins and we're gonna turn toward the one who is our Savior. And we're gonna surrender to him. Ask him to be the Lord of our lives. Ask him to forgive us. And when we do, he's gonna hear your prayer. He will forgive every sin you've ever committed. And he's gonna make you brand new. There are those of you God brought here for this moment. You recognize it. You're not playing around. This isn't halfway in. This isn't cultural Christianity. Jesus, I've sinned. I need your forgiveness. I want you to be first. Would you be the Savior and the

[Amy]

Lord of my life?

[Pastor Craig]

That's your prayer today.

[Amy]

You know it.

[Pastor Craig]

You're not playing around. This isn't half hearted Christianity.

[Amy]

This is a full on surrender. Jesus, take my life, I give it to you.

[Pastor Craig]

That's your prayer today.

[Amy]

Lift your hands high right now, all over the place.

[Pastor Craig]

Lift them up and say, yes, that's my prayer.

[Amy]

Praise God for you and over there as well. Others today say, yes, Jesus, I surrender. God bless you sir. Up there and over to the side. Praise God for you up there as well. Others say, yes, Jesus, I surrender. Be the Lord of my life online. Just type in the comment section.

[Pastor Craig]

I'm surrendering to Jesus today.

[Amy]

I'm surrendering to Jesus.

[Pastor Craig]

Would you pray with those around you? Pray, Heavenly Father, forgive all of my sins. Jesus, be my Lord and my Savior.

[Amy]

Fill me with your spirit so I

[Pastor Craig]

could know you, so I could live for you, so I could show your love. I give my life to you. Thank you for new life.

[Amy]

You have all of mine in Jesus name I pray. Church could you celebrate now? Could you welcome those born into the family?