!["Update on Rules for the Spatiotemporal Use of Campus Spaces" by Andrea Kriz + "[Part 2] Six-Gun Vixen and the Machinist of Doom Valley" by Ashok K. Banker — LIGHTSPEED MAGAZINE - Science Fiction and Fantasy Story Podcast (Sci-Fi | Audiobook | Short Stories) cover](https://megaphone.imgix.net/podcasts/47e34b78-f0f4-11ed-b69b-b3e59415b492/image/lightspeed-itunes.png?ixlib=rails-4.3.1&max-w=3000&max-h=3000&fit=crop&auto=format,compress)
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Lightspeed. Hello Starshine, the Earth says hello. And welcome to the Lightspeed Magazine Story Podcast. I'm your host, Janina Edwards. In this episode, you'll be listening to Update on Rules for the Spatial Use of Campus Spaces by Andrea Kriz and Part 2 of 6, Gun Vixen and the Machinist of Doom Valley by Ashok K. Banker. First up is our short shot Update on Rules for the Spatiotemporal Use of Campus Spaces by Andrea Kriz Coming up right after this message. Welcome back. And now, Update on Rules for the Spatiotemporal Use of Campus Spaces narrated by Stefan Rudnicki.
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Update on Rules for the Spatiotemporal Use of Campus Spaces by Andrea Kriz Dear members of the community, as we begin yet another fall semester in the throes of the rogue time stream unleashed on our campus, I cannot help but take a moment to marvel at just how vibrant our community has become. In addition to our current residents, our university's campus grounds and buildings have come to support thousands of students, staff, affiliates, and visitors from past, future, as well as alternate universities. While we hail from a variety of eras and societal norms, we nevertheless all share a desire to host community events and gatherings. Indeed, such gatherings have become the lifeblood of the University since the OR due to the future events of the spring of 2045. As affirmed upon my uncontested appointment to Presidency of the University, I wholeheartedly embrace the freedom of all community members to protest and dissent against the University's actions throughout all of history, even that of students originating from timelines governed by much more restrictive regimes than ours. However, such freedom cannot be limitless. In particular, it cannot be permitted to go on in such a manner that obstructs the University's continuing mission. To that end, with the authority newly bestowed on me, I have amended the University's rules on the use of campus spaces. Let me highlight for the particular benefit of those encamped on the University's quad, the one. Community members must produce a valid University ID when asked by university administrators or police. Remember that university IDs are valid for four years. Time stream fluctuations shall not preclude police from evicting protesters carrying IDs expired, according to officers local timekeeping devices. 2. Those entering the nexus of the time stream, currently located near the Founder's Statue on the quad, will be subjected to digital recordings or equivalent technology. According to the current era of the Nexus, face coverings may not be used to obfuscate drones. Participants diverting said drones to President's office will be held accountable for their actions. Three classes of 2049 and beyond will find an agreement to peaceful on campus Residency has been grandfathered into their application materials. Your continued presence on campus implies past signing of the agreement. Students are advised that failure to abide by terms of said agreement will create a time paradox, the most vicious manifestation of which may lead to to not only the undoing of their matriculation into the university, but their very birth itself. 4 degrees will continue to be withheld from the class of 2048 until the spectral fragments of professor scattered across space and time are returned to April 24, 2045 for reassembly. Professor will teach the Tokamak module of the Quantum Engineering seminar of spring 2045, reinstating the events leading to the construction of the Tachyon Accelerator as funded by the Department of Defense's Timeline Control Initiative. The instigator who pushed professor into the nascent time stream being conducted through the toroid structure, tearing him and his memory asunder across space time will be brought to justice. Five Appearances of the above mentioned instigator must be immediately reported to university administrators regardless of space and time. Community members are reminded that all past, future and alternate versions of said instigator have been placed on involuntary leave from the university and are no longer subject to the same protections as our students. Community members are warned not to believe in the instigator's lies, including but not limited to a the statement that millions if not billions of lives would have been annihilated as a result of Professor Ayres collaborations with the Department of Defense. B the insistence that the instigator could not have foreseen that the undoing of the accelerator's invention would fail to undo the time stream once contained within, leading to its subsequent flooding of campus. C the inane belief that conducting the flow of the time stream off the quad into uncontaminated dorms and lecture halls and eventually off campus is our only hope of democratizing timeline manipulation technology. Those found to be colluding with the instigator will be similarly stripped of all protections and and prosecuted to the full extent of the law. Community members are instead encouraged to keep professor memory alive by remembering the hundreds of students he mentored of which the instigator was the sole blight the millions of dollars of grant funding and most of all, the renown he brought to the university upon the award of his Nobel Prize in physics in 2045 lost to the time stream along with his very name. 6 On that note the University remains committed to restoring the original events of 2045 up to and including the dissolution of the spring 2045 encampment on the Quad. 7. Demonstrations, rallies and protests may not last more than 60 times 10 to the 24th cronons the time period corresponding to the shortest observed fluctuation of the time stream. In order to minimize the risk of cross dimensional reinforcement loops, the University continues to condemn in particular the time loop responsible for the abhorrent contortion of the face of the Founder's statue as well as the University crest into the agonized screams of those murdered by the actions of the University across centuries. Remember, just as you have your freedom to protest, your colleagues have the freedom to let your protestations pass into forgetfulness and in a timely manner. 8. Said demonstrations, rallies and protests must not interfere with reading periods for exams. 9. Coordination between alternate past and current protesters is strictly prohibited. You may not compare the University's current actions to its past use of enslaved persons for construct, its employment of armed security to suppress demonstrations deemed disruptive to society, nor its investment in regimes which have engaged in violence deemed appropriate for their eras, as judged by the University committee on shareholder responsibility. 10. The Keystone Events initiating the dissolution of spring 2045 encampment on the Quad may not be mentioned. The ones who perished in the fiery glory of our academic mission with freedom on their breaths shall not be named. They shall not be named. Their ashes shall be trodden into the greenery by students cutting across the quad and on their way to a reality where they can focus solely on their studies, unquestioned and undisturbed. Thank you for familiarizing yourself with this information. For those who have abided by the above, partial amnesty is still available. In return for purging your past, present, future and alternate selves of involvement with the time stream, I will facilitate your meeting with a secretary of a sub Chair of the University Committee on Shareholder Responsibility to discuss your perspectives. Please note that important confidential matters concerning the investment of the University's multi billion dollar endowment and support of our most prominent faculty will be neither disclosed nor modified as a result of such meetings. Acquiescing to hearing out your grievances is the least we can do. Sincerely, President of the University Its Pasts, Presents and Futures.
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That was update on Rules for the Spatio Temporal Use of Campus Spaces By Andrea Kriz Narrated by Stephan Rodnicki Directed by Alison Belle Buse Andrea Kriz is a PhD in Biological and Biomedical Sciences currently doing research in Brain Genetics at Harvard Medical School. Her short fiction has also appeared in Clark's World and Asimov's Science Fiction among others, and been translated into French in Galaxies sf. She is also part of the Dartmouth Speculative Fiction Project, a collaboration between authors and Dartmouth faculty to create short stories exploring the future of humanity. Her debut short story collection, Learning to Hate Yourself as a Self Defense Mechanism is available from Interstellar Flight Press. You can find her online at andreacriz.WordPress.com and Twitter heworldshe, saw and bluesky@andreacriz. BSKY Social Stephane Rodnicki is a double Grammy winning audiobook producer and an award winning narrator who has won 17 audio awards as well as more than 35 earphones awards and been named one of Audiophile's Golden Voices. Stephan has been producing Lightspeed magazine podcasts since 2010, eventually adding nightmare and Fantasy Magazine and sharing the Hugo Awards for Best Semi Pro scene in 2014 and 2015. Next we have part two of six Gun Vixen and the Machinist of Doom Valley By Ashok K. Banker Coming right Up
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the war is over and both sides lost. Kingdoms were reduced to cinders and armies scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left of a broken world, Praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight. But in the shadowdark, the darkness always wins. This is old school adventuring at its most cruel. Your torch the ticks down in real time, and when that flame dies, something else rises to finish the job. This is a brutal rules light nightmare with a story that emerges organically based on the decisions that the characters make. This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s. And man, it is so good to be back. Join the Glass Cannon podcast as we plunge into the shadow dark every Thursday night at 8pm Eastern on YouTube.com theglasscannon with the podcast version dropping the next day. See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark.
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Now please enjoy Part two. Six Gun Vixen and the Machinist of Doom Valley By Ashok K. Banker Narrated by me, Janina Edwards Continued from Part one the sun was sinking toward the horizon like a brass penny dropped in muddy water by the time I rode back into New Providence. My Haffy's mechanical shoes struck sparks off the metal road plates, each impact sending little jolts of pain through my spine. Those hours of riding and tracking had taken their toll, but it wasn't the kind of tire that sleep could fix, the kind of weary that comes from knowing too much, seeing too clear. Martin was out front of his stable when I rode up, those brass arms of his clicking nervously as he worked a rag over already gleaming pistons. His eyes didn't quite meet mine as I dismounted, which was the first warning sign. Morton wasn't the shy type. You need your halfy fed and watered? I'll do it. Cubs, too, but no board for the night, he said, voice low enough that I had to prick my wolf ears to catch it. Might want to settle your account and move on, if you take my meaning. I handed him the reins, keeping three hands ready near my guns while using the others to work out the stiffness in my shoulders. Towns got himself all wound up about something. His mechanical fingers clicked faster, that nervous tick of his working overtime. Talk's been going round since you left, folks saying all sorts of things about what you found out there, about who you might be working for. He glanced up and down the street. Or against. I snorted. Since when does this town care about anything except its own business? Since Mr. Beecham started making it everyone's business. Morton's brass fingers stopped their clicking. Man's been in and out all day talking to folk. Sheriff Hayes got called away sudden, like on some emergency down south. Left his deputies in charge. He spat in the dust. Those boys ain't exactly what you'd call independent thinkers, if you catch my drift. I can handle a few badge heavy deputies, I said, though something in my gut was starting to curl up like a rattler spotting an eagle's shadow. And Beecham's just a fancy lawyer with a clockwork eye. Morton's laugh was as mechanical as his arms. Lady, in this town that's like saying a rattlesnake's just a rope with an attitude. Man's got his coils wrapped around everything that matters. He took a step closer, voice dropping even lower. Word is he's got plans. Big plans. And folks who get in his way tend to have accidents. I checked my guns with all six hands, making sure each cylinder turned smooth. Good thing I don't believe in accidents, then. Your funeral, morton sighed, leading my happy toward the stall. He paused at the door. Just got you back in there. I tipped my hat and headed for the sheriff's office, my boot heels clicking against the metal plates like a clock counting down. Should have listened to that cold feeling in my gut. Should have noticed how the streets had emptied out, how the shadows seemed longer than they ought to be. But I'd always been better at shooting straight than thinking straight. And sometimes that's all it takes to get yourself into the kind of trouble that six guns can't shoot you out of. The sheriff's office smelled wrong. My wolf nose picked it up the moment I pushed through those brass bound doors. Gun oil and leather, sure, but underneath that was something else. Fear, sweat, and satisfaction. Like predators who think they've got their prey cornered. Two deputies lounged behind the desk where Sheriff Hayes usually sat. The older one had a mechanical arm that whirred too loud like it needed oiling. The younger one wore his badge crooked and had eyes that reminded me of a coyote, always looking for something weak to kill. Well, if it ain't the six handed freak the younger one trawled, not bothering to stand. Aren't you? Been poking around where you ain't wanted? I kept three hands near my guns, used another to tip my hat back. The other two I kept ready because sometimes six guns ain't enough. Sheriff Hayes around? Got some information he might want to hear about. The older deputy's arm whirred faster. Sheriff got called south. Some kind of Indian trouble down by the border left us in charge. He smiled, showing teeth that had been filed to points. But we'd be happy to take your information. I bet you would. I studied the office. Interesting timing, him being called away just when things are getting interesting. The younger one's hand dropped to his gun, suggesting something freak. Just the Beecham's got mighty convenient timing. I let that hang in the air a moment, watching their faces. Same way it was. Mighty convenient how that Indian raid on McGraw's family happened just when tensions were running high. Same way it's convenient how the only lawman in town who might ask questions gets called away right when you watch your mouth, the older deputy snarled, his mechanical arm clanking as he stood. Mr. Beecham's a respected citizen. He's done more for this town than any tin man. Done more to this town, you mean? I leaned forward, planting my hands on the desk. All six of them. Let me tell you what I found out at that homestead. Found signs that weren't Indian work at all. Found evidence of settler boots, not moccasins. Found a mechanical eye sized for a child, just like the ones Beecham's company makes. And I found found yourself about to get run out of town, the younger one cut in. Standing now, too, or worse. We don't need your kind here stirring up trouble, making accusations against good men. I straightened up, slow and deliberate. Hayes would want to hear this. He's got a sense for truth, that man. Maybe because he knows what it's like to be different. I smiled, letting them see my wolf teeth. That third ear of his picks up all sorts of interesting things, don't it? Things some folks might prefer stayed quiet. That hit home. They both went still, the way men do right before they reach for iron. The older one's mechanical arms stopped whirring completely. Sheriff Hayes ain't here, the younger one said finally. And when he gets back, if he gets back, maybe he won't be so understanding of differences anymore. Times are changing. Mr. Beecham's got plans for New Providence. Plans that don't include freaks and half breeds. We'll look into your concerns, the older one added, not even trying to hide a smile. Now you can be sure that real thorough like I knew then that Hayes wasn't coming back. Man like him, with that extra ear that could hear lies in a heartbeat, he probably never made it past the town limits. Beecham was cleaning house, and I just walked into the middle of his spring cleaning. You do that, I said, turning to go. You look real careful. And when you're done looking, you tell Beecham something from me. I paused at the door. Tell him I know what he did to that family, what he's planning for the tribes. And tell him six gun vixens coming for him. Their laughter followed me out into the street. They thought they had the upper hand, thought they had everything under control. Just like Beecham, with his clockwork eye and his plans within plans. The Golden Spur was packed tighter than a steam engine's combustion chamber. Seemed like half the town had decided they needed a drink at the same time. The mechanical piano tinkled in the corner, playing something that might have been a hymn or funeral march. Hard to tell with those brass keys. I shouldered my way to the bar, keeping all six hands where they could reach iron quick. The bartender had changed since morning. This one had a brass plate where his left eye should have been and hands that moved too smooth as he poured drinks. Reminded me of a snake oil merchant I'd once seen in Dodge, all brass and smile, with poison underneath. Whiskey, I said. The good stuff. He set out a glass and filled it with amber liquid that caught the electric lights like liquid gold. On Mr. Beecham's account, he said, that brass eye whirring as it focused on me. Least we can do for someone who's helping keep the peace. I sniffed. The whiskey smelled right enough, but something in the bartender's voice made my wolf ears twitch. Same tone I'd heard from a thousand men before they tried to put me in the ground. Still, I was tired and thirsty, and sometimes a suspicious nature can make you miss out on the simple pleasures. Way I figured it, even if it was poisoned, my wolf blood could handle most anything these town folk could cook up. The whiskey burned going down, but not the way it should. More like ice than fire. Spreading cold fingers through my gut reminded me of the Shadow cursed medicine the tribal healers used to force down my throat. Except this wasn't meant to cure anything. A group of roughnecks at the end of the bar been watching me since I walked in. Big fellas, trail dust still on their boots, but rifles too clean for real cowboys. One of them, ugly as a mechanical mule's backside, spat on the floor. I'd seen his type before, the kind that'd shoot a woman for wearing pants or string up a half breed just to pass the time. Here they let all sorts in here now, he said, Loud enough to carry even six armed freaks. I set my glass down with two hands, kept the others ready, or tried to. They felt slow, like they were moving through molasses, like that time in Kansas when a rattler bit me and my whole body went numb. Here they let all sorts talk, too, I said. Even men too stupid to know when to shut up. He pushed off from the bar. Had to be six and a half feet Tall, with shoulders wide as a door. A brass knuckled fist the size of a ham clicked as he clinched it. The sound reminded me of a coffin lid closing. Maybe somebody needs to teach you some manners, he growled. Show you your place. I went to stand, and the room tilted sideways. My hands felt like they were wrapped in wool, and my guns might as well have been miles away for all the good they do me. Whatever they put in that whiskey was stronger than regular poison. Had to be something cooked up special for half breeds like me. The roughneck grinned, showing teeth capped with steel. Something wrong, freak? You ain't looking so good. I tried to focus, but there were two of him now, both coming at me with those brass knuckles raised. I swung with my right hands, or tried to. They tangled with each other, weak as a newborn's grip. First time in my life having six arms was more curse than blessing. His fist caught me in the ribs and it felt like being kicked by a mechanical horse. I staggered, tried to draw a gun, but my fingers wouldn't close right. The metal felt cold and dead in my hands, like it knew I couldn't use it. Not so tough without your shooting irons, are you? Another blow, this one to my jaw. The floor came up to meet me, hard as McGraw's conscience. Boots surrounded me, started kicking. I curled up, trying to protect my vital parts, but with six arms and not enough control to use them, I was tangled up in my own limbs. Each impact felt distant, like it was happening to someone else. But I knew when I woke up, if I woke up, I'd be feeling every single one. The last thing I saw was the bartender watching that brass eye whirring as it recorded everything. Then something hit me hard in the temple and darkness swallowed me whole. First thing I noticed when I came to was the taste of copper in my mouth. And not the good kind neither. Blood mixed with whatever poison they'd slipped in that whiskey. My head felt like it was stuffed with sand and rusty gears, every thought grinding painful against the next. Couldn't move my hands, any of them. Took me a moment to realize why. They'd strapped me down with strips of leather to some kind of metal table. Good leather, too, the kind that costs more than most men make in a month. The kind Beecham would use. The room stank of machine oil and antiseptic, sharp enough to make my wolf nose twitch. Somewhere nearby, steam hissed through pipes and gears clicked like angry insects. A mechanical heart monitor ticked out my pulse, each beat echoing off metal walls. Ah, you're awake, Beecham's voice slithered out of the shadows. I was beginning to worry they'd been a touch overzealous. His clockwork eye whirred as he stepped into view. He changed his fancy Eastern suit for a surgeon's apron. Dark stains spattered across the front. Some looked fresh. Most impressive constitution you have, he said, checking something on the monitor. That dose would have killed three normal men. But then you're not exactly normal, are you? I tried to speak, but my tongue felt thick as saddle leather. He noticed and smiled, that mechanical eye spinning faster. Oh, don't worry about conversation. I find most patients more cooperative when they can't talk back. Gives us a chance to focus on the work at hand. He picked up something that gleamed like a dentist's nightmare. And we have so much work to do. The door opened and more figures shuffled in. Men in white coats, their own brass eyes whirring in sync with Beecham's. The roughnecks from the saloon stood guard by the door, brass knuckles still spotted with my blood. You see, meacham said, leaning close enough that I could smell mint on his breath. I've always wondered about specimens like you. How does that extra musculature attach? What allows your nervous system to control so many limbs? The tool in his hand hummed to life. I think it's time we found out, don't you? He pressed the humming tool against my forearm and pain shot through me like lightning through copper wire. My wolf blood burned hot at the violation, but whatever they dosed me with kept my muscles slack as old rope. Fascinating, beecham murmured. The nerve responses are entirely normal, yet the branching structure. He made a note on a brass tablet with his free hand. Bring me the saw. The small one, one of his white coated assistants, shuffled forward, mechanical eyes whirring in time with the boss man's. The saw he handed over looked like something you'd use to cut through bone, except it had teeth made of blue tinted steel and a motor that purred like an angry cat. You know, beecham said conversationally as he tested the saw's edge, I've done this procedure seventeen times now. Started with circus freaks, drifters, people no one would miss. But none of them had your unique attributes. His clockwork eye spun faster. The girl was a disappointment. Too young, too fragile to likely survive the procedure. But you. You're perfect. My mind caught on that like a cactus spine. The girl. Sarah. Somewhere in this building. Assuming she was still alive. The thought sent fresh fire through my veins. But my limbs might as well have been carved from wood of Course, he continued. The tribal specimens were educational, too. Their connection to the old technologies, the way their bodies accept mechanical augmentation. It's remarkable. But messy. Unpredictable. He positioned the saw just below my left shoulder, where my third arm joined. You're different. Natural. Pure. The saw whined to life. I could feel its teeth tickling my skin through the drugs like ice cold needles. The roughnecks by the door grinned, probably remembering how those arms had felt hitting their faces in the saloon back when I could still move. The settlers are sheep, beecham said, his voice taking on the rhythm of a preacher at revival. They see the tribes as savages, the half breeds as abominations. They don't understand that every revolution requires refinement. The weak must be culled so the strong can evolve. The saw bit deeper. I smelled my own blood, copper sweet, and wolf wild. When I'm done, he went on, there won't be any more natural mutations. No more tribal magic. Everything will be controlled, measured, manufactured progress. Pure and clean as steel. His clockwork eye glowed fever bright. And you, my dear, are going to help me understand exactly how. Through the drug haze I heard a sound that didn't belong, a low growl that vibrated through the metal floor plates. Beacham was too caught up in his sermon to notice, but I knew that sound, knew it like I knew my own heartbeat. The fascinating thing about hybrid physiology, beecham was saying as he worked the saw deeper, is how it integrates seemingly incompatible elements. Your nervous system, for instance. The growl came again, louder. The roughnecks at the door shifted uneasily, hands dropping to their guns. Even their brass capped teeth couldn't hide the fear starting to show. Sir? One of them started, but Beecham waved him quiet with the bloody saw. Don't interrupt. This is delicate work. His clockwork eye whirred as he bent closer to my arm. Now, if we follow this nerve cluster, we should find the wall exploded inward in a shower of brass and steel. Through the gap came my Haffy, steam venting from his mechanical shoes, wolf fangs gleaming in the electric light. And riding on his back, fur bristling and jade gold, eyes blazing, were my cubs. The little female launched herself straight at Beecham's face, claws extended. Her brother went for the nearest roughneck's throat, moving like liquid shadow. They might be small, but they had their mama's instincts and my training. Impossible. Beecham staggered back, trying to pry the cub from his face. The stable. Guess Morton ain't as afraid of you as you thought, I managed through numb lips. The drugs were starting to fade, pushed back by wolf blood and rage. I could feel my fingers again, all 30 of them. My halfy's jaws closed around one of the roughnecks, shaking him like a rat. The others tried to shoot, but they were too busy dealing with £40 of angry cat breed cub attached to their faces and throats. The white coated men huddled in corners, their mechanical eyes spinning in terror as death came for them. On four legs and two smaller sets of paws, Beecham finally tore the female cub free, throwing her aside. She landed on her feet, hissing. Blood streamed from deep scratches across his face, his clockwork eyes sparking and stuttering. Kill them. He screamed. Kill them all. Three hands worth of claws raked through the leather straps holding me down. I rolled off the table just as more guards burst through the door, these ones carrying rifles with brass bayonets. Time to go, I told my family. The cubs disengaged, bounding back to my haffy. I stumbled, still weak from the jugs, but managed to grab onto his mane as he wheeled around. You can't escape. Beecham's voice was shrill with rage and fear. I'll find you. I'll find all of you. Looking forward to it, I said, and dug my spurs into my haffies flanks. He crashed through another wall, cubs clinging to his back, me hanging on with what strength I had left behind us. Rifles cracked and bullets whined, but we were already gone, racing into the night. Beecham could wait. Right now I needed to heal, needed to think, needed to figure out how to stop him before he did to others what he tried to do to me. But next time I wouldn't be the one strapped to that table. My hathi galloped through the darkness, each stride eating up ground between us and our pursuers. The sound of mechanical horses grew closer. Their steam driven legs might run forever the but they couldn't match our speed over broken ground. Still, we needed something more than just distance to shake them. The canyon opened up ahead of us like a wound in the earth. My haffy balked at the entrance, steam venting from his shoes in nervous bursts. The cubs pressed closer against his flanks, their fur bristling. They knew what lived in these shadows. My wolfnose picked up the scent before we saw them. Peyokoyos. Dozens of them, their fur glowing faintly from the hallucinogenic peyote cactus they fed on. A bite from them was a one way ticket to a mescaline fever dream and death. A mechanical horse's whistle pierced the night. No choice now, I dug my spurs in, and we plunged into the canyon. Peyo coyos scattered at our approach, their eyes gleaming like burning copper in the darkness. They were bigger than regular coyotes, with extra joints in their legs and jaws that could unhinge like a snake's. The peyote they ate had changed them over generations, made them something else entirely. The first bite caught me in the calf, felt like lightning, struck my leg, sent colors shooting through my head that had no business existing. A second pale koyo leaped, fastened onto one of my left arms. I haffy kicked it away, but not before its venom hit my bloodstream. The world started to twist. The canyon walls breathed like living flesh, their rock faces rippling with veins of molten brass. My vision fractured, split into six different versions of reality, one for each of my eyes that didn't exist. Gunshots echoed behind us. Beecham's men had followed us in despite the warnings. I heard their screams as the pao coyos found them, heard their mechanical mounts shrieking as fangs pierced steam pipes and poison hot blood. The venom turned my blood to liquid moonlight. I slid from my Haffy's back, told him and the cubs to run ahead. My hands, all six of them trailing colors like comets, found my guns. The metal sang to me, whispered secrets about death and dreams. First gunman I found was shooting at shadows that danced like mechanical spiders. I put three bullets through him before he knew I was there. His blood fell upward, turned to stars where it hit the canyon walls. The second one was already down, wrestling with payo coyos that might have been real or might have been hallucinations. Didn't matter. My bullets killed him just the same. I stalked through the canyon like a ghost. The venom made me see truth beneath the flesh, showed me the mechanical hearts beating in human shells, the brass soles trying to replace meat with metal. I killed three more, or maybe the same one three times. Reality had stopped making the kind of sense that could be counted. The last thing I remember was was a pale koyo pack taking down a mechanical horse, their venom rich saliva melting through its brass hide like acid. The rider's screams turned to music, then to colors, then to darkness. I fell into that darkness, like falling into a deep well. The canyon walls danced. The moon shattered into a thousand clockwork pieces, and somewhere far away, I heard my cubs calling. Then nothing at all. The pao koyo venom turned my blood to starlight and my bones to brass. I fell through memories like falling through broken glass, each shard cutting deep enough to bleed. The canyon walls breathed around me, their rock faces rippling like silk in wind. Somewhere far away I heard my cubs calling, but their cries twisted into temple bells, ringing across the Ganges. At dawn Mother was combing my hair, all six of my hands folded in my lap like good little girls should sit. I was five, maybe six, Old enough to know I was different. Young enough to still believe different might be special. Such beautiful hands, she whispered, working sweet smelling oil through my dark strands. The Goddess Durga herself blessed you with him. Her own fingers, just two hands worth, moved with practiced grace. You know the story? Yes. How she needed all her arms to fight the demon Mahishasura. I nodded, though the movement made the temple bells ring louder. They weren't bells anymore, but mechanical chimes, steam driven and precise, counting down to something I couldn't quite remember. Then why do they hate me, Ma? My voice was small bird bone, fragile. The Brahmin children. They say I'm cursed. Shadow touched the comb, stopped moving in the mirror. Was it a mirror or a pool of quicksilver? I saw tears in her eyes. They fear what they don't understand, little one. Fear makes people cruel. The memory fractured, reformed now I was seven, hiding behind Father as the village elders pronounced their judgment. Their words fell like hammer blows. Unclean. Untouchable. Abomination. Father's voice rose in protest. She's just a child. The gods made her this way. The gods. The head priest spat. Look at her. Six arms like some demon spawn. And those wolf eyes. No, this is divine blessing. This is karma, punishment for sins in past lives. Mother tried to shield me, but I saw how the other women drew back from her touch, as if misfortune could spread like fever. Even the lowest castes, the sweepers and tanners, turned away. To them we were less than nothing. Shadow cursed. The venom sang in my veins, turning the memory to liquid fire. The priest's face melted into Beecham's, clockwork eye spinning, calculating the price of flesh and soul. I tried to reach for my guns, but my hands were small again, child hands useless against the weight of tradition and hate. Starvation came next, slow and cruel as winter. The village gates were closed to us. No one would trade with Shadow. Cursed Father sold everything we owned. Mother's wedding jewelry, his grandfather's sword, even the small brass idol of Durga that it watched over our home. Still, it wasn't enough. I watched Mother grow thin, her beautiful face hollow with hunger. But she never stopped smiling when she looked at me. My special girl, she'd say, using all six of my hands to warm her own. The world isn't ready for you yet. But it will be. The memory poison burned hotter. I saw Mother's last days when typhoid took her. The missionary doctor refused to treat her. Couldn't risk contamination, he said. Couldn't touch the shadow. Cursed, I held her with all six hands as she burned with fever, as if I could keep her soul from slipping away by sheer force of grip. Remember, she whispered, her cracked lips barely moving. Remember that what makes you different makes you strong. But I wasn't strong enough to save her. Father changed after that. The proud Brahmin scholar became a hollow man, his eyes fixed on some distant horizon where pride didn't matter, where caste was just a word. He signed the Girmitya papers in a fever of grief, the agreement that would take us across the Black Water to the Promised Land. Better to be slaves in a new world, he said, than ghosts in the old one. The ship, God, the ship. The venom made me smell it again. Hundreds of bodies packed into the hold, the stench of fever and dysentery, the endless rocking that made even the strongest men weep. Children died every night, their small bodies wrapped in canvas and dropped into waves black as ink. Father held me as we watched another burial at sea. You see, he whispered, death doesn't care about caste, doesn't care about how many arms or eyes you have. In the end, we're all just meat for the waves. The memory twisted, writhed. Now I was 15, watching Father die in a settler's field, his back broken from years of labor. The agreement had promised freedom after five years, but there were always new debts, new contracts, new ways to keep us bound. Listen, he rasped, gripping my hand. Just one of them, though. I wanted to hold him with all six. The things they hate you for. They can be your ruin or your salvation. I finished tasting blood that might have been real or just another trick of the venom. He smiled, touched my wolf eye with a trembling finger. You were born to fight demons, just like Durga. But first you have to stop seeing yourself through their eyes. The venom burned brighter, turning his face to light, then shadow, then nothing at all. I fell through darkness that sang with temple bells and steam whistles, with children's cruel laughter and priests curses, with Mother's lullabies and Father's last words. When I surfaced, gasping, the first thing I saw was my guns. All six of them, laid out Nita's prayer beads on a blanket beside me. I wasn't in the canyon anymore, but in a small hut that smelled of sage and machine oil. My hands moved without thinking, reaching for the familiar weight of steel. Easy there, Seeksgun. Rattlesnake's voice came from somewhere behind me. Those peyo coyos hit you pretty hard. Been three days. I tried to sit up, but the world swam like water in monsoon season. My cubs safe, fed. You're happy, too, though. He tried to take my other arm. First couple times I brought him water. Metal clinked as he moved closer. You were talking in your sleep. Different language. Sounded like prayers. I touched my face, felt dried tears. Not prayers. Memories. He was quiet for a moment, his mechanical arm whirring, soft as cricket song. Yeah, he said finally. Venom has a way of making you face things you've been running from. I looked at my hands, all six of them marked with scars and calluses, strong enough now to hold my own destiny. Mother was right. The world hadn't been ready for me then, but I was ready for it now. Six Gun vixen, I'd named myself. Turning curse into blessing, weakness into strength. Just like Father said. The things they hated me for had become my salvation after all. Three days, you said. I reached for my guns, letting each hand remember its purpose. Time to ride. Got some demons that need fighting. Rattlesnake's mechanical eye glowed in the dim light. Thought you might say that. He paused. Thing about demons, though, sometimes better to hunt them together. I thought about all the hands it takes to fight a demon. Thought about Mother's stories of Durga, who needed every one of her arms to win her battle. Thought about Father's words, about seeing yourself through different eyes. Maybe, I said, checking my guns one by one. But first tell me what you know about Beecham and his plans for the tribes. All of it. The venom's last whispers faded like temple bells at dusk, leaving behind a clarity sharp as new forged steel. Time to show them what six hands and two wolf eyes could really do. I studied that mechanical arm of his again in my mind. No pureblood would wear metal that way. They'd rather go to their graves whole, all wanting, than mix flesh with machine. Made him a half breed, like me. Or maybe quarterblood, trying to prove something. Explains why he knew about shadow. Cursed folk. Folks like us learn to spot our own kind. Beecham calls them improvements, rattlesnake said, catching my gaze on his arm. The brass clicked as he flexed it, tribal patterns shifting like living things. Says he's bringing civilization to the savages, one piece at a time. Start him with you. His laugh was bitter as desert wind. Sheaf's son makes a good example, they figured. Show the tribes what happens when you resist Progress. The mechanical eye whirred as he looked away. By the time they finished, my own people wouldn't look at me. Called me ghost touched. Cursed shadow. Cursed Ghost touched. Different words. Same old fear. McGraw's family, I said. That wasn't Indy's work. Beecham's men made it look tribal. The markings, the fire pattern. But it was settler work through and through. He pulled something from his mechanical arm's storage compartment. A brass button with the Beecham Co. Mark. Found this at the scene, along with other things that didn't belong. Why, Sarah? Girl's got a gift with machines. Natural talent for mixing flesh and metal. Beecham's been watching her for years. Waiting. McGraw's wealthy. His hybrid cattle operation, all of it was built on Beecham's loans. Man's got his hooks in deep. I thought about McGraw's grief, genuine as sunrise. He doesn't know men like Beecham. They're the real power out here. Kings rise and fall. But the bankers, the lawyers, the men who control the money and the laws, they are constant as the stars. Rattlesnake's mechanical arm. They're building a new world piece by piece. And folks like us, we're just raw material. You sound like you're speaking from experience. Seen it happen before. Beecham finds someone useful, someone different. Offers them a choice that ain't really a choice. Then when he's done with them. He gestured at his arm. Well, let's just say there's a reason they call his kind recyclers. My hands checked my guns by habit. All six of them, moving in familiar patterns. Man needs killing. You'd be dead before you got within a mile of him. He's got an army of augmented men, mechanical hunters that never sleep. And those are just the obvious defenses. So what's your stake in this? Why help me? His mechanical eye focused on me, glowing like ember light. Same as you. Sarah's just a kid. Doesn't deserve what Beecham's got planned for her. He paused. Besides, enemy of my enemy and all that. I work alone, I said, but the words felt hollow as a broken promise. Like hell you do. He nodded toward where my haffies snores rumbled outside, mixed with the cub's softer breathing. What do you call them? And who pulled you out of that canyon before the Peyo Coyos turned you into dinner? Same as they did those cowboys who followed you in. I started to argue, but he cut me off. Face it, Six Gun, You've already got partners. You just don't want to admit it, because letting folks close means risking loss. Believe me, I know something about that. The cubs stirred in their sleep outside, their little bellies full of whatever rattlesnake had been feeding them these past three days. My Happy's contented grumble followed, reminding me how he charged through that saloon window without hesitation, saving more than just my life. Fine, I said finally. But just until we get Sarah back to McGraw. After that, we go our separate ways. His mechanical arm clicked in what might have been agreement. After that, he said, we'll see what the world has planned for folks like us. I wasn't sure I liked the sound of that, but I had other concerns. Tell me everything you know about Beecham's operation, where he's keeping Sarah, what kind of resistance we're looking at. You're not going to like it, he said, but he started talking anyway. Outside, a dawn wind carried the smell of sage and machine oil, mixing them together like everything else in this broken world. Maybe that's all any of us were, pieces that didn't quite fit, trying to make something new from the wreckage of the old Doom Valley earned its name fair and square. My haffies hackles rose the moment we crested the ridge, and even the cubs huddled deeper in their saddlebags, their usual mewling silenced by the weight of ancient grief that hung over the place. The valley floor stretched out below us like a wound that wouldn't heal, all red rock and twisted metal with steam vents hissing from cracks in the earth. Valley of the People, rattlesnake said, his mechanical eye whirring as it adjusted to the dying light. Or was before Beecham's kind came. Every rock, every ridge. They're all grave markers. Whole tribes buried their dead here for generations. I studied the landscape through my wolf eye. Where my human eyes saw only desolation, the yellow one picked out patterns, pictographs carved into cliff faces, spirit totems worked into the very bones of the earth and among them, like maggots in a corpse. Beecham's machines steam powered drills boring into sacred ground, mechanical cranes lifting ore from open pits. Your people won't come here anymore? I asked, though I already knew the answer. Place stank of desecration. Would you build a factory in your mother's grave? His mechanical arm clicked as he gestured toward the spiraling complex below. That's what Beecham counted on. No tribes to resist, no settlers to ask questions. Perfect place to do the kind of work decent folks don't want to think about. The factory itself squatted in the valley's heart like some great brass spider. Smoke belched from a dozen chimneys, and the ground trembled with the rhythm of massive machines. Railroad tracks snaked in from the west, bringing ore from McGraw's mines, but it was what I saw leaving by the eastern track that made my blood run cold. Those ain't regular cargo cars, I said, watching a train pull away. Each car was sealed tight, with small barred windows and steam vents along the sides. They're carrying something alive. Flesh and metal both, Rattlesnake confirmed. Raw material for his improvements. Sometimes whole families disappear from settler towns or tribal camps. Go quiet in the night. This is where they end up. My hands tightened on my guns. All six of them. Sarah's in there. Lower levels, where he keeps his think tank. Rattlesnake's voice turned bitter as poison. Saw them when I was recovering. Brilliant minds from back East. Tribal medicine men. Even a Chinese railroad engineer who designed some new fangled steam engine. All of them improved until they're more machine than man. One of the cubs stirred in his saddlebag, letting out a small sound that might have been fear or fury. Mahaffy answered with a low growl of his own. They could smell it, too. The wrongness of this place, the way it twisted everything natural into something else. How do we get in? I asked. Rattlesnake's mechanical eye glowed brighter as darkness crept into the valley. That's the easy part. Getting out again. That's what you ought to be asking about. The factory's bowels were a maze of pipes and pistons, everything moving in a rhythm that felt almost alive. Steam hissed through copper veins and gears turned like mechanical hearts. My wolf eye picked out patterns in the chaos, the way flesh and metal merged, how living tissue wrapped around brass and steel like ivy climbing a wall. The think tank level hit me like a punch to the gut. These weren't just people with mechanical parts grafted on like Rattlesnake. These were souls bound to their machines, merged so deep you couldn't tell where flesh ended and metal began. The Chinese engineer, Zhang, had been a railroad genius before Beecham got hold of him now. His torso sprouted directly from a steam engine's control panel, his arms replaced with brass levers that controlled pressure valves. But his eyes. Those were still human, and they watched us with a hunger that had nothing to do with flesh. Six arms, he said, his voice wheezing like a tired bellows. Natural ones. And wolf eyes, too. You're one of the blessed ones. Ain't nothing blessed about being different, I said, keeping my hands near my guns. Just what Makes folks want to change you. Make you fit their world. A laugh came from deeper in the shadows, more mechanical grinding than human sound. Oh, she understands, doesn't she, Zhang? A woman's face emerged from a nest of brass tubes and copper wires. I'm Dr. Elizabeth Carter. Was, anyway, before I made the mistake of showing Beecham my designs for mechanical limb replacements. Your own designs, I said, seeing the cruel irony of it. He used them on you. On all of us, said another voice, this one belonging to a tribal medicine man whose lower body had been replaced with a calculating engine. Brass gear is clicking where his legs should be. He takes what makes us special and turns it against us. Makes us part of his machine. The cubs pressed against my legs, sensing my tension. My Halfie's hackles were up, but he wasn't growling. These folks weren't threats, they were victims. Same as Sarah would be if we didn't move fast. The girl, I said. Where is she? Prep room, elizabeth said, her voice catching. He's starting the procedure tonight. Wants to make her his masterpiece. Young enough that the integration will be perfect. She'll be his proof that flesh and metal can become one. Not if I have anything to say about it. All six of my hands checked my guns. How do we get there? We can help, zhang said, his levers moving in complex patterns. Control the steam floss, overrides security systems. But you have to promise us something. What's that? When you're done. Elizabeth's eyes gleamed in the darkness. Burn it all down. Free us from these machines. Better dead than living like this. I looked at Rattlesnake. His mechanical eye whirred as he nodded slowly. Dying ain't always the worst thing that can happen to a person, he said. I thought about Mother's last days, about Father broken in that settler's field. About all the ways people can be bound, trapped, changed against their will. I promise, I said. But first, tell me everything about this place. Every pipe, every valve, every way in and out. And most importantly, where Beecham keeps his guards. The think tank came alive then, each trapped soul contributing their piece of the puzzle through every inch of this hell factory because they were part of it, had been for years, feeling it pulse and grow like a cancer in sacred ground. Time to cut it out. We found them in what Beecham called his integration chamber. Place stank of blood and machine oil, brass instruments laid out neat as Sunday silverware on a tray beside the operating table. Sarah was strapped down, still conscious, tears cutting clean tracks through the grime on her face, but her eyes they had steel in them, same as her mama's. Beecham stood over her in a leather apron, dark with old stains. His clockwork eye worried as it tracked our entrance, mechanical servos adjusting to the change in light. But he didn't look surprised. That should have warned me. You're right on schedule, he said, and snapped his fingers. The door slammed shut behind us. Steam hissed from vents in the ceiling, and I heard the distinctive click of a dozen rifles being cocked. My wolf eye picked them out in the shadows, guards with brass grafted limbs and mechanical eyes all trained on us. Six arms and a renegade, beachum said, clicking his tongue. Did you really think I wouldn't be prepared? That my own think tank wouldn't warn me of your coming? They're part of my machine, after all. Every thought, every whisper feeds back to me. He gestured, and one of his guards fired. The bullet took me in the shoulder. My third right arm went limp, useless. Another shot, and Rattlesnake's mechanical arm sparked and seized up. Progress demands sacrifice, beecham continued, picking up something that looked like a cross between a saw and a steam drill. But it also demands control. Order. Your mutations, fascinating as they are, happened by chance. What I create here is purposeful, directed, the next step in human evolution. Ain't nothing evolutionary about torture, I said, trying to keep him talking while my good hands inched toward my guns. But the guards were watching every move. He laughed. Torture. This is transformation. Look at Sarah here. Such potential. The ability to understand machines, to speak their language. But it's raw, undisciplined. I'll make her perfect, just like I made them perfect. He gestured at his guards, former tribals, settlers, even a few railroad workers, all of them fighting progress at first. Now they're part of something greater, a new order for a new world. The only order you care about is the kind that keeps you on top. Rattlesnake spat. His mechanical eye was sparking, but his human one blazed with fury. Ah, the chief's son speaks. Beecham smiled. My first successful integration of tribal blood with modern machinery, though I've refined the process considerably since then. The neural bonding alone. A low growl cut through his words. The guards shifted nervously, looking for its source. That was their mistake. They were looking for something big. But my cubs had learned to move quiet as shadows. They struck from beneath grates in the floor, tiny claws finding flesh behind mechanical knees. Two guards went down howling. I didn't waste the distraction. Five guns cleared leather while my wounded arm hung limp. Rattlesnake's mechanical arm might be damaged but the gun hidden inside still worked. We laid down enough lead to give us breathing room, but more guards were pouring in through hidden doors. You see, Beecham shouted over the gunfire. This is why the old ways must be overcome. Animals, instincts, chaos. All must be controlled. A bullet caught me in the leg. Another grazed my cheek. We were pinned down behind an operating table, and I could hear more guards coming. The cubs had retreated into the ventilation system, but they couldn't help us now. That's when I heard it. A different kind of mechanical sound. Not the hiss of steam or the click of gears, but something deeper. A rumble coming from the walls themselves. Sir. One of the guards shouted. The pressure gauges. What? Meacham's clockwork eye whirred frantically. That's impossible. The think tank can't override my can't we? Elizabeth's voice came through every speaking tube at once, and this time she didn't sound afraid. You made us part of your machine, Beecham. Made us feel every piston stroke, every valve release. Made us learn to think in steam and steel. Metal screamed against metal. Pipes burst, releasing scalding jets that drove the guards back. Mechanical arms emerged from panels in the walls, dozens of them, brass and copper and steel, reaching with surgical precision. No. Beachum turned to run, but there was nowhere to go. I created you. I control you. You bound us to your machines. Zhang's voice hissed through steam vents, made us learn their language. But you never wondered what we might be telling them. The mechanical arms moved like snakes, wrapping around guards, dismantling their augmentations with terrible precision. I used the chaos to get to Sarah, my five working hands making quick work of her restraints while my sixth hung useless. Beecham raised a pistol, his clockwork eye spinning wild. I won't let you ruin everything. Rattlesnake's shot took him in the hand, sending the gun spinning. My own bullets ensured he wouldn't reach for another. What are you going to do to me? He asked, voice cracking as the mechanical arms wrapped around him. His clockwork eye sparked and stuttered, like it was finally showing the fear behind the machine. I holstered my guns, breathing hard against the pain in my shoulder and leg. Me? Nothing. But they've got some ideas they'd like to share with you. About progress, about improvement. About what it means to be part of something bigger than yourself. The last I saw of Beecham, he was being drawn into the walls of his own creation, mechanical arms cradling him like a mother spider welcoming home her young. His screams echoed through the factory's brass arteries but not for long. Progress comes for everyone sooner or later, even the men who think they control it. McGraw was waiting at his ranch house, pacing the porch like a caged animal. When he saw Sarah riding double with me on my Halfy. Something broke in his face, all that wealthy rancher pride washing away in a flood of relief. Uncle John. Sarah leaped from the saddle before we fully stopped running to him. He caught her in his arms, holding her like she might disappear if he let go. For a moment they were just family again, not part of Beecham's grand schemes. You found her, McGraw said finally, voice rough. He reached into his vest, pulled out a leather pouch heavy with gold as promised. 500. I took the pouch with one hand, checked the weight with another, while my other hands stayed steady. Old habits die hard. Might want to keep a closer eye on your business partners in the future, I said. Some of them ain't as civilized as they pretend. His face darkened. Beecham won't be troubling anyone again. I didn't mention how some things are better left to imagination, but he had plans for your mines, your cattle operation. Might want to have your lawyers look into that. McGraw nodded slowly. Stay, he said suddenly. There's good land west of here, untouched. Could use someone like you nearby. Someone who sees clear. I thought about it, thought about having a real home again, somewhere to raise the cubs proper, somewhere to rest. But the wind was picking up, carrying the smell of sage and open country. My Haffy's ears twitched and Rattlesnake's mechanical mount, a strange cross between a mountain lion and a steam engine. He called a steam cat, growled low in its brass throat. Appreciate the offer, I said, but the horizon keeps calling. He understood. Men like him always did, built empires by staying put, but never stopped respecting those who couldn't. Morton was working on his brass arms when I rode into town. Oil can balanced between his mechanical fingers. His eyes widened at the sight of me. Seems word of what happened in Doom Valley had already spread. Heard you did some spring cleaning, he said, trying to sound casual. I flipped him a gold piece, watched him catch it, smooth as silk with those brass fingers. Promised to oil those arms for you, I said. A deal's a deal. He smiled, actually smiled. Could use a good mechanic in town, Sheriff Hayes was saying just yesterday how things might be different now. Real progress, not just machines pretending to be progress. The sheriff himself appeared then, that third ear of his twitching like he could hear the future coming. Town's changing, he said. Might be room for all sorts here now. All kinds. I finished with Morton's arms, each joint moving silent as a hunting cat. The cubs watched from their saddlebags, bigger now, stronger, ready for whatever came next. My haffies stamped impatiently and Rattlesnake's Steam Cat let out a sound halfway between a purr and a steam whistle. Changes are coming, I agreed, but they'll have to catch up to us somewhere down the trail. The sheriff nodded, touched the brim of his hat. Morton flexed his freshly oiled arms, and somewhere in the distance a train whistle cried like a lonely wolf. Time to ride. We took the east road out of town. Four strange creatures and their stranger riders, my Haffy and Rattlesnake Steam Cat, the cubs growing stronger every day, and two people who'd learned that being different wasn't a curse, it was just another way of being alive. The horizon stretched out before us, endless as possibility. Somewhere out there, Mother's spirit was smiling and Father's words echoed on the wind. The things they hate you for can be your salvation. Six hands reached for reins adjusted, guns scratched the cubs behind their ears. Two wolf eyes watched the sun rising on a new day, and the future, like always, waited just over the next ridge. All we had to do was ride to meet it. That was part two of Six Gun, Vixen and the Machinist of Doom Valley. By Ashok K. Banker Narrated by me Janina Edwards Ashok K. Banker is the author of the burnt Empire Trilogy, HarperCollins, Voyager, among other books. His short fiction has appeared in Asimov's, Lightspeed, Nightmare, Weird Tales, Best New Fantasy, and is forthcoming in F&SF among other places. Janina Edwards is an award winning narrator of more than 500 audiobooks. Her narration work has received multiple Earphones awards, an audi win, and 2 Society of Voice Arts and Sciences nominations. She is a member of the Audible Narrator hall of fame class of 2026. Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same Premium Wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities. So do like I did and have one of your assistant's assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to do@mintmobile.com
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Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month Required intro rate first 3 months only then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees ext terms@mintmobile.com oh please, not that music.
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That music gives me nightmares from my childhood.
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Could we get something a little bit lighter. Some lighter music here.
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Are you a fan of true crime TV shows?
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And what about Unsolved Mysteries, the show that jump started all of our love of true crime.
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I'm Ellen Marsh.
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And I'm Joey Taranto.
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And we host I Think Not, a true crime comedy podcast covering some of the wildest stories from your friends favorite true crime campy TV shows all the way to Unsolved Mysteries.
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Baby. You will laugh, you will cry. You'll think about true crime in a whole new way. And you'll also ask yourself, who gave these people mics?
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New episodes of I Think not are released every Wednesday, with bonus episodes out every Thursday on Patreon.
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And every Monday you can listen to our true crime rundown where we go over the top true crime headlines of the week.
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So come, come and join us wherever you listen to your podcasts.
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There are vampires out there. They walk among you. Shoulder to shoulder in the dark. Heading to work, heading home, going to the bar. It's a life just like anyone else's and I have grown used to it. To the darkness, to the moon, to the taste of blood on my tongue. But vampires are dying out. We are a fading kind. And I am the first one created in so long. And that is a dangerous thing to be. Those who came before me, elders of all stripes, they do not want to see our kind gone. And they will do anything to keep their power. And for myself and for Grace, who created me. That is a sword that hangs above our heads. And the worst person of all carries our secret. And he will use it however he sees fit. Who do you look to when things are at their darkest? From the creators of Park Dill Haunt comes Woodbine, a podcast about monsters, dreams and changes, those you want and those you never saw. Coming Season 2 arrives September 24th distributed by Realm.
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Lightspeed Magazine, is edited by John Joseph of Adams and published by Adamant Press. The podcast is co produced by Stefan Matnicki and Alison Belle Bues at Skyboat Media and the stories and podcast are copyright 2026. Post production was by Alex Barton at Faceshift and our music was composed and performed by Jack Kincaid. Thanks for listening, Starshine. This is your host, Janina Edwards. See you later, partner. On the other side of this sunset. Giddyup.
LIGHTSPEED MAGAZINE – Science Fiction & Fantasy Story Podcast
Episode Date: April 23, 2026
Host: Janina Edwards
Stories:
This episode of the Lightspeed Magazine podcast delivers a compelling blend of genre fiction—a satirical sci-fi short story skewering contemporary university bureaucracy and the ongoing fight for protest rights in futures both familiar and bizarre, followed by the next action-packed installment in a Weird Western saga set in a world of mechanical augmentation and colonial trauma. Both pieces interrogate ideas of power, identity, resistance, and the dangerous allure of "progress," but from wildly different vantage points—one through biting institutional parody, the other via pulpy, mythic adventure.
By Andrea Kriz
Narrated by Stefan Rudnicki
[00:59 – 12:10]
A satirical bureaucratic memo from a University president, addressed to a campus beset by spatiotemporal chaos (e.g., overlapping timelines, spectral professors, alternate versions of people), updating protest regulations. The story lampoons the way institutions weaponize rules, procedures, and erasure to suppress dissent—even as time is literally unraveling.
Dry, acerbic institutional jargon with sharp undertones of dystopian horror.
By Ashok K. Banker
Narrated by Janina Edwards
[16:32 – 78:48]
Picking up in the aftermath of the first part, this segment plunges deeper into the steampunk Weird West of Six-Gun Vixen, a six-armed, wolf-blooded gunslinger. It's a story of resistance against colonial “progress,” body horror, and the reclamation of identity in the face of dehumanizing power—told through the lens of pulpy adventure.
Wry, hard-boiled, mythic—alternately gritty, emotionally raw, and self-aware. Blends pulp action, postcolonial critique, and found-family affirmation.
This episode is a tour de force in genre storytelling with sharp political and personal resonance. Andrea Kriz's and Ashok K. Banker's stories are both entertaining and unflinching in their critique:
Perfect for fans of smart, subversive speculative fiction that refuses to let go after you finish listening.