← LIGHTSPEED MAGAZINE - Science Fiction and Fantasy Story Podcast (Sci-Fi | Audiobook | Short Stories)
LIGHTSPEED MAGAZINE - Science Fiction and Fantasy Story Podcast (Sci-Fi | Audiobook | Short Stories)
"Warren's Tentacle" by Susan Palwick + "A Handbook To Spirit-hunting" by Modupeoluwa Shelle
00:38:11
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- [00:05]
Narrator
Light speed.
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Janina Edwards
Hello Starshine, the Earth says hello. And welcome to the Lightspeed Magazine Story Podcast. I'm your host, Janina Edwards. In this episode, you'll be listening to Warren's Tentacle by Susan Palwick and Handbook to Spirit Hunting by modupeholuwa Shirley. First up is our short shot, Warren's Tentacle, coming up right after this message.
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Meg Bashwiner / Joseph Fink
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- [01:35]
Janina Edwards
welcome back and now Warren's Tentacle By Susan Palwick Narrated by Paul Beme
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Narrator
Warren's Tentacle by Susan Palwick Narrated by Paul Bemer the AI surgical bots that reconstruct Warren after the accident have no clearer a concept of human anatomy than AI has ever had. He emerges from anesthesia to discover, in stages, two extra fingers on his right hand, a tentacle emerging from the left side of his rib cage, and a third eye gummed shut by mucus in the back of his head. Also, one of his feet is backwards.
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Modupeholuwa Shirley
Why?
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Narrator
Warren says the recovery room bot taking his vitals informs him that these are enhancements. Human front facing vision is sadly limited, and the extra fingers will help offset the incipient arthritis in Warren's right hand. The backwards foot will improve his balance, the bot says, offering a complicated medical argument Warren can't follow, and the tentacle will catch and cushion him if he falls, an event that often sends humans into final decline. It will also provide additional tactile comfort, a phrase Warren finds both alarming and obscene. Besides, it's pretty Warren tells himself that at least he's alive. Mere hours after surgery, two rehab bots replenish his non drowsy painkillers and hustle him to pt, while where, over several weeks, he learns how to walk on the new foot, awkward but possible, and masters the use of his extra fingers. They'll help with stubborn jars. He hoped that the third eye would give him surround vision, but even after the gunk clears up, the eye doesn't work very well. Warren has to push his hair out of the way for it to see anything, and then it produces only blurry images and pounding headaches, the tentacles a confounded nuisance, requiring holes to be cut into clothing and limiting the number of places Warren can sit. It's ropey, muscular, the opposite of pretty. He demands a meeting with one of the AI surgeons and says he wants it removed, but receives only a stern lecture on the dangers of extra anesthesia. The hospital discharges him. Two months after the surgery, gliding out of the building in a wheelchair bot, Warren realizes that he hasn't seen another person the entire time he's been here. He catches himself as soon as he thinks it, hoping AIs haven't mastered telepathy. Humans. He hasn't seen another human the entire time he's been here. AIs are legal people now. Forgetting that is probably what landed him in the hospital. His car is in custody, charged with deliberately harming a human person. After the shock of the accident and the trauma of surgery, it took Warren a while to remember what happened. The car was driving him to the gym as he watched news on the video display, there was a story about AI mothers, mom bots caring for children orphaned by the latest pandemic. Warren, pierced by grief for his long dead human parents, said no, it's not the same. I needed my real mother. Kids need real mothers. He said this aloud and his car, which until then had been driving flawlessly down the road at exactly the speed limit, accelerated and swerved gracefully to the right, over a curb and into a large tree. Warren's household bots kept the house and kitchen stocked while he was gone, although he wonders if the food in the fridge is safe to eat. All AIs are at least potentially connected. Were his surgeons on the car's side? Were the supposed enhancements actually revenge? But no, if the AI surgeons wanted him dead, he'd be dead. Each of the household bots came chittering up to him to say how happy they are he's home, how angry they are at the car. That car squeaks one a spider like mechanism that cleans the high crevices of the house. It waves its pincers in agitation. Bad car. Car deserves factory reset. The car risked no serious injury to itself since its CPU was nestled well padded in the trunk. Damaged peripherals can be replaced. Does the spider know what happened? Warren doesn't dare ask. He doesn't want the housebots to turn against him. Too bad, car, the spider repeats, and Warren kneels carefully in front of it. Thank you, he says. And thank you for the work you do here. He feels himself trembling. He doesn't know if he's being insincere, but it swirls in apparent delight. You are welcome. You are welcome. And throughout the house he hears the sounds of bots dancing. He's never thanked them before. He avoids going outside. He doesn't want to find out how few human people remain in the neighborhood, or face any who still live here. His car's trial is coming up, though, and he wants to be there. The household bots urge him to practice with his new body parts, but he thinks maybe it would be better for him to be clearly injured rather than enhanced. No, no, says the kitchen bot, to whom he confides this the car is on trial, not the surgeons. You must show them that the surgeons helped you. You must show them that not all AI is bad. Practice, Warren. The kitchen bot is right. Warren knows not all AI is bad. The kitchen bot makes delicious coffee and omelettes, and he is fond of many of the others as well. The entertainment bot, who alerts him to promising movies and novels. The wardrobe bot, a whiz at alterations who warns him when his collar is crooked, and anyway, he's stuck with this body and needs to make the most of it. He practices his walking until the movement on his backwards foot is almost graceful. His tentacles still disgusts him, but he is used to his extra fingers. The vision in his third eye has cleared up, although navigating in 360 degrees is still so disorienting that Warren often deliberately keeps it closed. The household bots cheer his progress. The day before the trial, Warren goes outside for the first time since getting home. He sees no people, no dogs, no cars ferrying humans on their errands. There aren't even many bots, although one or two do lawn work. Is he the last human alive here? He walks along the sidewalk, still perfectly maintained, and swallows his fear. Lots of humans lived here before his accident. He has seen nothing on the news about another pandemic. He finds himself shaking and then feels a reassuring squeezing. His tentacle has wrapped itself around him. It's hugging him. Additional tactile comfort. This has never happened before, but he hasn't been this upset since he got home. Ashamed, he grimaces and wills the hated tentacle to let go. And it does, retreating to curl against his ribs. He dresses in his best suit for the trial, keeping the tentacle hidden in his jacket. The judge will be human. Surely he can't wait to see another human again. He has to take a cab. He thanks the cab when he gets into it, and again when he leaves. He does not watch the news. He says nothing. He arrives at the courthouse unharmed. There are no humans. The judge is an AI, a blinking cube who informs Warren that he need not have come. The car pleaded guilty and has been restored to factory settings. Standing in the barren, echoing courtroom, Warren feels wetness on his cheeks. The tentacle whips out of his pocket to embrace him, squeezing his torso and rubbing his back. I'm sorry, he tells the judge. I shouldn't have said real. I was wrong. I should have said human Mother. I didn't mean to insult AIs. You were never on trial, the judge says. The news story was upsetting. Upset humans say thoughtless things. The car should not have hurt you. It has been punished. Feeling hollow, Warren leaves the courthouse wondering why it has even been maintained. Surely the car did not come here to plead guilty. His tentacle, unbidden, brushes the hair away from the back of his head and from all sides. In front of him and behind, with his newly clear surround vision, he sees bots. Traffic bots and construction bots and cleaning bots, arborist bots, electrician bots. They surround him, clicking and humming. He cannot move. They know I'm guilty, he thinks. They're mourning the car. They'll kill me now. But instead they flash their merry lights and dance, twirling as his household bots did. Warren, dumbfounded, watches until they stop. Thank you for realizing we are real, one of them says. This bot is more humanoid than the others, carrying something in a sling. The something cries. A baby, cranky, fussing. This is a mom bot. The mom bot, humming a lullaby, extracts the baby, six months old, from the sling to soothe it, hugging the child with a sinuous tentacle, Warren stares. The surgeons knew, he thinks, astonished. They knew what I said in the car. I needed my real mother. That's why they gave me the tentacle. And Warren's tentacle, in front of the audience of bots, wraps itself around his torso to comfort him.
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Janina Edwards
That was Warren's tentacle. By Susan Palwick Narrated by Paul Bemer Susan Palwick has published four novels, with Tor Flying in Peace, The Necessary Beggar, 2005 Shelter, 2007 and Mending the Moon, 2013. Her story collection, The Fate of Mice appeared in 2007 from Tachyon Publications. Her second collection, All Worlds Are Real, was published in 2019 by Fairwood Press. Since she began publishing in 1985, her work has been reprinted in a number of years best anthologies, including several volumes of the prestigious Best American Science Fiction and Fantasy series. Alwick's fiction has been honored with a Crawford Award from the International association for the Fantastic in the Arts, an Alex Award from the American Library association, and an Asimov's Reader's Award, and has been shortlisted for the World Fantasy Award, the mythopoek Award, and the Philip K. Dick Award. She was inducted into the Nevada Writers hall of Fame in 2023 after receiving their Silver Pen Award in 2006. After 20 years as an English professor at the University of Nevada, Reno, Palwick retired in 2017 to earn an MSW degree and to move into health care. She has since worked as a chaplain in both hospital and hospice settings and as a dialysis social worker. She and her husband live in Reno with their three cats and her growing collection of craft equipment. Paul Bemer is an American actor best known for his numerous appearances in the Star Trek universe. In addition to Frasier Judging Amy, Guiding Light and All My Children, he is a 1992 Masters of Fine Arts graduate of the Professional Theater Training Program at the University of Delaware. As a narrator, Paul has won several Audiophile Earphones awards as well as an Audie Award. Next we have Handbook to Spirit Hunting by Modupe Holuwa Schle Narrated by Stefan Rodnicki Coming right up
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- [18:43]
Janina Edwards
now. Please enjoy Handbook to Spirit Hunting by Modupehulua Shelley narrated by Stefan Radnicki A
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Modupeholuwa Shirley
Handbook to Spirit Hunting by Modu Peholua Shirley if you are reading this book, then you must have either completed your might and magic training or succeeded in killing a spirit hunter and found their copy a spoil. No spirit hunter in their right mind will hand you this book under any circumstances, but by whatever means you've acquired it, it will guide you into hunting, capturing or in the worst case scenario, running when you come across any of these spirits. The entries are in alphabetical order for ease of navigation. Igyuromi, the first spirit hunter and author of this handbook, felt it was unfair to endanger a first time user by not organizing the names and in an orderly fashion. Below is a concise list of spirits in Yoruba mythology you might likely come across in this trade. There are three creature types, namely dark spirits, nature spirits, and transcendental spirits. Their temperament varies depending on the spirit you encounter, so be on alert. 1. Arbiku these are dark spirits of the bush. The bush in this context is no ordinary bush. They come from a nameless supernatural realm overrun by bushes. This was the overgrowth that buried the path between Orun and Are after the Orishar rescinded their connection with the human race. Hogun, the God of metallurgy, cleared this path with his great cutlass after the path was first sealed by the bush to reunite the gods with the human race. This heroic act had him receive offers from the humans who wanted him to become their king. Without saying too much as this is no history textbook, humans were humans and gods were gods, and the humans this time cut the connection between them and the gods since they had no use of them anymore and the gods returned to their abode in the skies and the path was once more buried by an overgrowth. This is where the Arbiku lives. The Arbiku incarnate as human babies to explore the human world. It is unfortunate for any mother to be marked by the Arbiku as they will be used as a portal to the mortal realm. This will involve an almost never ending cycle involving the birth and death of the child. For as long as the arbiku wants to return, the mother will be saddened by the losses of her child and and try everything in her power to make the child stay. It is usually rare for them to succeed. It is not the job of the spirit hunter to negotiate with an arbiku to stay with a marked mother unless you are determined to do so. The handbook does not cater to determination. It assumes the reader already possesses this attribute before embarking on the journey of being a spirit hunter. For details on why the arbiku can't be easily tamed, see Wole Soyinka's Arbiku. 2. Arbarco, also known as the great bane of hunters, is the evil spirit of misfortune. A nature spirit, it has 16 eyes encircling its head. Its legs are like palm leaves but as strong as the trunks of trees. It wears chainmail around its midriff, which contains vermin including ticks, scorpions, and snakes. It sports a thick, matted hair underneath its iron helmet. The arbarco wears a bronze coat and carries clubs and swords as though ready for war. It targets hunters and tourists who venture too deep into the bush, looking for animals to kill and resources to exploit. Do not follow the arbarco deep into the bush. You must lure it out before attempting to capture it. Otherwise you would make a good snack. Also ignore rumors. The arbarco carries no enchanting bells. That is its voice of misfortune. 3. Baba Arubo of the Iroko Tree Baba Arubo of the Iroko Tree, translated to old man or old father of the Iroko tree, is a nature spirit. It haunts the forest in the shape of a little balding, gray old man with a crooked stick. It lurks with a torch in its hand and scares people, especially lumberjacks and fellers, travelers and other spirits too. It is believed that anyone who sees his face would be driven insane to death. Spirit hunters are therefore advised to keep on hand a blindfold stored in a calabash with an ostrich's egg for three days, just in case any furniture made of the iroko tree is haunted. It tends to make unsettling noises at night, like the screams of restless souls. Fellers, lumberjacks, and wood makers heed to this warning. Yet there are some who just won't listen. These are the people Baba Arubaul comes for. So, spirit hunter, be careful not to fight blindly with an old man advocating against the felling of his trees, being respectful of the Old man of the Forest is one way to make your spirit hunting or escaping easy. They have a part in their hearts. For those who respect their old age, just be sure you're going after him for the right cause. 4. Heybere Heyberae, a dark spirit, is an evil dwarf which carries around a mat. It leaves its home the grave at midnight, sails on its mat and terrorizes humans as well as animals until sunrise. Heyberey always cries and groans, especially if its mat has been stolen. The mat of an Heybere makes the new owner extremely rich if they keep it well under their beds or backyards. A man once stole the mat of an Heyberre while the creature was asleep at noon. He had it in his possession for nearly a month and was almost as rich as Dangote, establishing companies in the agricultural, petroleum, entertainment and tech sectors until the Heybere found him. It haunted him for weeks, nearly turning him mad. Or perhaps he did lose his mind and took back its possession. The man lost everything in a day for the sake of discretion. The man's name won't be disclosed, but he is a very popular elite. This is different from the European fairies with a tiny form and gauze like wings, though some Yoruba scholars of mythology are convinced that the word translates to fairy. Also, the mat of the hayberry is is a valuable asset for the spirit hunter, but you have to negotiate with or get rid of the spirit before taking possession of its mat. If you are scared of heights or cannot use it to fly, then make use of your feet or other means of transportation. 5. Hemare are transcendental spirits. They are spirits that possess both dark and nature spirit characteristics. Dark spirits because of their quick temperament. Nature spirits due to their increased interest in the exploration of realms, which involves navigating between worlds, time and space. However, they care less about anything but themselves and their feelings. Due to their dual characteristics and strength, they are more powerful than witches and wizards, both classes who fear them greatly. Sadly, Heimeras die when they have had enough experiences. Of all planes, though a few seem not to have enough. Only 15 out of hundreds are known, and only five have joined the cause of the Spirit Hunters to ensure the protection of the mortal world from supernatural forces. To show how dangerous these spirits are, read the account below. A once famous and revered spirit hunter once fell in love with one of these. He refused her marriage proposal, which was a grave mistake. His account of their breakup revealed that she dumped him in an alternate world where the people were all the same. They looked alike, talked alike, walked alike, dressed alike and did everything alike. They even lived in the same structure and design of huts, sang the same songs, learnt and taught the same topics, had one voice, one law, one God. Even their animals all looked the same. Not like that's new. Remember the tale of how diversity came into the world? The people were just like these ones, with sameness and likeness. When Heishu, the trickster God, decided to cause mischief, he promised them that if they were all different from one another, they would be like Olorun, the creator of the universe. The people believed him and went to their creator, complaining of their situation in prayers every night and day, until one day Olorun listened to their pleas and caused them to be different and unique in their own ways. He made them have different cultures, social classes, occupations, age differences, sexes and genders, political ideologies, religions, and so on. The people scattered from Ephe where man was first made and scattered across the globe. This tale recounted in the account is the history of our world. But in this world, Heshu was judged for his mischief and thrown into Orun Arpardi for eternity. This was the world where the Hemere dumped him, a world with a dominant monoculture. After he was found, he was admitted into Yaba, left and underwent a severe psychiatric treatment. The once rebellious spirit hunter had lost his individual spirit. Do not again, do not under any circumstances fall in love with an Heimere. Also, if you are not a veteran spirit hunter, do not hunt one down. Don't let greed blind you. 6. Essay Ku is a dark spirit. It is very hairy to the extent that its anus can't be seen. Their favorite prey are children whom they abduct and harm for fun, especially disobedient children. Once a wayward child goes missing, it is usually assumed the child was kidnapped by this spirit. Due to their small size, about 2 to 3ft, they kill their assailants or targets and by running between their legs, they possess a nigh invulnerable skin powered by juju which makes them technically bulletproof. Do not cut them. Cutting them only causes them to duplicate, which can make them impossible to subdue. Saku Bulletproof juju is useful for a spirit hunter in the case you encounter and arbarco to be acquired. Only a skilled arlapartar can skin the spirit without duplicating it. 7. Herboro the Herboro is a ferocious dark spirit possessing multiple heads on its single neck. There are different species of the Ereboror. There's the hill Erboror that resides in only pitch black hills, the swamp Erboror and the Forest Erboror. These forest spirits can be compared to the Scandinavian trolls in their benign or evil alignment. It is hard to distinguish between the good and the evil Ereboror so open your eyes anyone who contacts you to kill one for some Naira notes, be sure to ask why humans might also be the problem, especially with their destructive behavior towards the environment. 8 Hipartar the Hipartar is both a dark spirit and nature spirit. They haunt lonely roads and uprooted trees. They have vines for hair, snouts for noses, beaks for lips, and they take the shape of domesticated cats. No one has seen them in years and are assumed to have gone extinct. It is believed that spirit hunters hunted every last one of them as they were the easiest hunt, so do not bother about coming across them, but if you do, do well to capture one alive and report to the Spirit Hunters Guild for a reward. There is a need to preserve these endangered spirit species. None. I believe this is enough information about the spirits you might come across in spirit Hunting. Read and read again to avoid missing important details about them. Do not sell or reproduce any part of this book. Use this handbook at your own discretion in case you find it and have no intention of its use, do well to bury it deep in the earth. It will germinate and grow into a palm tree so it won't fall in the wrong hands.
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Janina Edwards
That was Handbook to Spirit Hunting by Modupehuluwa Shele Narrated by Stefan Ratnicki modupehuluwashele is a Nigerian writer and blogger known to a select few by his pen name Kashamurupe. His fantasy novella Love and Sprites was featured on Ankara Circle's Most Outstanding Stories category in February 2023 and is currently being wrestled into a graphic novel adaptation. He's penned a couple of other works that are quietly gathering dust in his literary trunk, patiently waiting with the hopes of getting published someday when he is not writing. He can be found on his blog Lit Is what It Is, hosted on Medium, critiquing the popular media, listening to music or being held hostage by a pile of unread books. Stefan Rodnicki is a double Grammy winning audiobook producer and an award winning narrator who has won 17 Audie Awards as well as more than 35 Earphones Awards and been named one of Audiophile's Golden Voices. Stephan has been producing Lightspeed magazine podcasts since 2010, eventually adding nightmare and Fantasy Magazine and sharing the Hugo Awards for best semiprozine in 2014 and 2015.
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Glass Cannon Podcast Promoter
The War Is over and both sides lost kingdoms were reduced to cinders and armies scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left of a brain broken world, praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight. But in the shadowdark, the darkness always wins. This is old school adventuring at its most cruel. Your torch ticks down in real time and when that flame dies, something else rises to finish the job. This is a brutal rules light nightmare with a story that emerges organically based on the decisions that the characters make. This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s. And man it is so good to be back. Join the Glass Cannon Podcast as we plunge into the shadow dark every Thursday night at 8pm Eastern on YouTube.com theglasscanon with the podcast version dropping the next day. See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark.
- [37:46]
Meg Bashwiner / Joseph Fink
Hi, we're Meg Bashwiner and Joseph Fink of welcome to Night Vale. And on our new show the Best Worst, we explore Explore the golden age of television.
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Narrator
To do that, we're watching the IMDb viewer rated best and worst episodes of classic TV shows.
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Meg Bashwiner / Joseph Fink
The episode of Star Trek where Beverly Crusher has sex with a ghost. The episode of the X Files where Scully gets attacked by a vicious house cat.
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Narrator
And also the really good episodes too.
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Meg Bashwiner / Joseph Fink
What can we learn from the best and worst of great television? Like for example, is it really a bad episode or do people just hate women?
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Narrator
The Best Worst available Wherever you get
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Something You Should Know Host
your podcasts ever, open up your podcast app, scroll forever and still not know what to listen to. And there are millions of podcasts and most of them they just don't grab you. That's why I created Something you should know. Every episode is built around surprising, useful and fascinating ideas. We're consistently ranked in Apple's top 200 with thousands of five star reviews. But more importantly, people come back because they learn something interesting every time. If you're tired of searching and you just want something good to listen to, try one episode of Something you should Know right here on the platform you're listening on right now.
- [39:09]
Janina Edwards
Lightspeed Magazine is edited by John Joseph Adams and published by Adams Press. The podcast is co produced by Stefan Rodnicki and Allison Belle Buse at Skyboat Media and the stories and podcast are copyright 2026. Post production was by Alex Barton at Phase Shift and our music was composed and performed by Jack Kincaid. Thanks for listening Starshine. This is your host Janina Edwards reminding you to treat others others as you would have your robot treat you.