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Molly Sims
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Emisha Gormley
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Molly Sims
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Emisha Gormley
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Molly Sims
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Emisha Gormley
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Molly Sims
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Emisha Gormley
Quince.comlipstick hey, I'm Molly Sims. And I'm Emisha Gormley. We're two girls obsessed with one thing, beauty.
Molly Sims
And by that, we mean everything that.
Emisha Gormley
Makes you look and feel beautiful. We're calling on our favorite health experts, industry insiders and friends to answer all.
Molly Sims
Your beauty questions with a drink in hand.
Emisha Gormley
Definitely with a drink in hand.
Molly Sims
You're listening to Lipstick on the Rim with Molly Sims. I mean, I'm not even kidding when I say we get so many DMs. About today's topic. I mean, it's kind of wild because.
Emisha Gormley
We are like the poster child of dating. Just kidding. It is wild, but I totally get it. Everyone wants to know how to find their person, where to look, when it'll.
Molly Sims
Be happen, and if it's already too late, it's never too late.
Emisha Gormley
That I can say never too late.
Molly Sims
Today we're talking love. We're gonna tell you how we met our husbands, what we've learned about timing, why there's truly no such thing as being behind when it comes, you know, really to finding the one. We both got married a little bit later. Me more than her, than most of our friends. And you know what?
It's okay.
Emisha Gormley
It is okay. And you know, our love stories are unique and great, and I think we both went through our phases of panicking at one point or another.
Molly Sims
20S, 30s, 40s, if you're single, dating, divorced, discouraged. Well, this one's for you.
Emisha Gormley
All right, you go first.
Molly Sims
Okay. So, I mean, I think I want to start kind of the opposite way and, and end with the. With the happy ending. Like, my dating wasn't perfect, you know, I mean, you kissed a lot of.
Emisha Gormley
You didn't kiss friends.
Molly Sims
I dated great.
Emisha Gormley
You dated great guys.
Molly Sims
I did. I dated great guys. I was not the most. I mean, I was a little bit of a gypsy, so I, you know, some unlike other People living in one city for a long time or one town. I was constantly on the go. So that did make it even harder. I mean, this is pre apps, but I definitely, you know, I had my patterns of dating men that, well, boys at the time.
Emisha Gormley
You were a serial monogamist.
Molly Sims
I was a serial monogamist. Yeah, I was.
You were.
Emisha Gormley
So was I until I wasn't for a very small blip.
Molly Sims
And I did feel, I think through my, my dating, I always just thought deep down it would like work out and then it didn't. You know what I mean? Like, until it did.
Emisha Gormley
I think the one thing that resonates with me and I actually had this conversation with someone who's a lot younger than me not long ago. And it was, I wish I would have known this the amount of times I was single for about two years. I was in a few serious relationships single for about two years. And then I met Mike. And in those two years when I dated. Dating in New York is like a beast. It is. It is the wild, wild west. Kenna is nodding as she's chewing a banana.
Molly Sims
It is the wild wild west.
Emisha Gormley
It was. It was. But I feel like I was in it just short enough of a time to not lose my mind. And what I will say though, and this was the piece of advice I gave to someone younger, was if you are thinking there's something wrong, if you're trying to like dissect a text message and then text. He's not answ. When you're overthinking it, it's not working.
Molly Sims
How many hours he's responded to a text or not a text because.
Emisha Gormley
Or he gave a non answer answer.
Molly Sims
Or they're probably working right. Like the things like don't, don't jump to conclusions. So let's start in your 20s. Okay.
Emisha Gormley
Yes.
Molly Sims
For me, I'm from Kentucky. Most of my friends that I grew up with, they were married by the time they got out of college. They have grown kids now. That was not my journey or mine or yours. But that's okay if it was most of my friends. My brother met the love of his life when he was, I want to say 17 and she was 15. And they've been together and have two amazing children and are obsessed. Todd and Alexa Sims, obsessed with each other. A couple of things that I think are really important for people to know when they're trying to find their partner. You have to have like mindedness, like similar values that you really align on money being one of them. How you look at money, how you spend money.
Emisha Gormley
Number one reason people get divorced is money.
Molly Sims
Value money.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah.
Molly Sims
Are you fucking cheap? Right? Could never, ever, ever. All the boys I dated, like, if you can't buy me a fucking cup of coffee or a steak, Remember when.
Emisha Gormley
I had to split a bill? Or I actually ended up paying for the bill.
Molly Sims
So we were at Raul's in Soho. Great steakhouse. Amazing. Is Raul still there?
Emisha Gormley
I think it is, yeah.
Molly Sims
It's so good. It's dark, it's sexy, it's great. She invites me. We will remain. From the names. We go, he's fine. Bill comes.
Emisha Gormley
I snatched that bill up faster than you've ever seen someone snatch a bill up. Because I didn't want my friends to notice that I had to. To pay for it because he couldn't afford it.
Molly Sims
I looked out of the corner of my. I was like, what are you doing? But I've done it. I've shared the rent. Like, what the. Again, I'm not saying go 50, 50, but if you're having to go 50, 50 on every single. On every single dollar on. Like, you're not aligned on money.
Emisha Gormley
Fashion, here is what you're. What you're going to get the gist of.
Molly Sims
Yeah, we're world fashion.
Emisha Gormley
World fashion. But here's what I will say if you're gonna. If you're in your 20s and you're listening, here is. Have fun. I think it's. Yes, there are the wonderful Todd and Alexis stories. There are those stories. But I do think that for the most part, that is rare when people stay madly in love. Your 20s, you don't really know who you are, who you are. You don't know what you want. You don't know what you're going to be. You don't know what you're going to do. You might end up switching careers.
Molly Sims
I personally, living in another. If someone offers you to go somewhere to live in another country, another state, another city, go do it. Do it.
Emisha Gormley
Figure yourself out.
Molly Sims
Date.
Emisha Gormley
Date a lot. Because I will say, the more you date, the more you find out what you don't know or what you don't like and then figure out what you like.
Molly Sims
I'm a completely different person who I was in my 20s. I mean, I still have the same values, but even into my early 30s, like, what I thought I wanted, I didn't want. And trust me, I am a fucking chameleon. I could pretend like I liked Heineken and live in a camper. I did it.
Emisha Gormley
In our 30s, Molly and I went to Vancouver island and this was. This is. I'm going to tell you what I remember looking in the rear view mirror and Kenna and Rosie, you're gonna hear this because this is the Molly that was back then with who this person was.
Molly Sims
I have to wear my bandana.
Emisha Gormley
She. I'm driving down this, like, freeway on this island in, like, snowy mountains. We went canoeing. We did like, shit that we don't do anymore. And I look out my rear view mirror and Molly is going, woo. Out of the top of a sunroof. Okay? L. She's like, woo. And I'm like, ollie, is she gonna fucking fall out of the car? Like, what's happening here? She's like, woo. And she has these big Tom Ford sunglasses on a kerchief. So chic, by the way. Bandana, kerchief, like, on her back. For her, she's like, free child. And I'm like, oh, my God. And by the way, that's not. I mean, I love you. You're not sticking your head out of a sunroof. Like, that's not who you are.
Molly Sims
But it was fun. It was fun.
Emisha Gormley
Rosie and Kenna are like, literally jaws to the ground. But that's because in our 20s, I think, and even in our early 30s, when we're trying to figure it out, you're trying to adapt who you are to the other person.
Molly Sims
The other person.
Emisha Gormley
Don't do it.
Molly Sims
Don't do it. Just don't do it.
Emisha Gormley
Okay, so let's talk about how we met. You tell the story about how. Because I do think your 20s. You dated a lot.
Molly Sims
20S. I dated a lot. I was madly in love with someone I got really broken up with really bad. He was on his way to film. We all know who it is, but I was really devastated. You know, he was my best friend for a long time. Um, I actually had great. I was engaged to Stefan, who I love, this French guy. He actually came to my wedding, who's still one of my best friends to this day. Um, but again, my life changed every. It was like every five years. It just. Just changed. Um, and you grew and I grew and I just started. I didn't really want to be married young. That was also me. I didn't want to have kids young. I think my mom was freaking out by, like, 33. She was like, what the fuck?
Emisha Gormley
She did.
Molly Sims
I remember what the fuck was happening. We had pep talks, but I don't know. I had gotten to a place and I got out a really shitty relationship and I was just bad and wrong. And he was wrong for me and I was wrong for him and I decided to date. And for me that was a big deal considering I was starting at 35 years old. I was to that point had been a serial monogamist.
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Molly Sims
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Molly Sims
I'm a total carb girl. I love carbs. But here's the thing. I still want to feel good about what I'm eating. That's why I'm obsessed with Herobred. I don't know if you guys have heard it, but it's all the comfort food you love, but with the nutrition that actually fits with my goals without feeling like I'm giving up anything. Herobrite covers all the bases. Sliced bread, tortillas, bagels, dinner rolls and now Hero Noodles. Oh that's right. Yes noodles. They have more protein and 60% fewer calories than the best selling noodles. Talking only 5 grams net carbs, zero sugar, 12 grams of protein and 32 grams of fiber per serving. And guess what? They taste amazing. Emisha and I love them. Honestly, the first time I tried herobread I was a little bit shocked. The texture is soft, fluffy and exactly what you expect from your favorite bakery bread. Their bagels are my weekday breakfast lifesaver. And their noodles. Oh my God. My kids have been requesting Mac and cheese every night. What I love most is there is no compromise. It's ultra low net carbs, high in fiber and zero sugar. But you'd never know it from the taste. Herobred is offering 10% off your first order. Go to Hero Co Use code Lipstick at checkout. That's lipstickhero.co. if you've listened to our Holiday Gift Guide episode a couple weeks ago, then you know Emisha and I consider holiday shopping a sport and one of our go to places for finding the perfect gifts. This is Macy's. Macy's honestly makes it so easy, especially if you're down to the wire. They've curated gifts by Persona category and price point. For the someone in your life who thinks they're a chef. The KitchenAid artisan stand mixers one of a kind green pan cookware or classic Le Creuset Dutch oven is truly the perfect gift. Okay for the homebody in your life. Ugg hoodies slippers are the chef's kiss and for your most stylish friend, you can't go wrong with the Sam Edelman studded ballerina flats. The suede Coach bag. Plus Macy's has amazing deals going on with the Maisies Great Gift Sale happening now through December 24th with up to 30 to 60% off gifts that truly don't disappoint. They're dropping new curated lists every day for kids, for her, for him. All the last minute lifesavers you can pop in store for a quick access or order online by 1221 at 5pm Eastern for guaranteed Christmas delivery. Maisie's Great Gift Sale happening now through December 24th with up to 30 to 60% off gifts that truly don't disappoint point.
Emisha Gormley
So tell us how you met Stuber.
Molly Sims
How did I meet Stuber? I. I was trying to date with her. So Emisha Was. Was it Daniel? It. Was it Emisha? Was it Danielle? Who would write my text?
Emisha Gormley
I did.
Molly Sims
Yeah, you wrote most of my text. You're smarter and, like, faster than me, but, yeah, you would write my text. But I was a terrible dater. Like, terrible. I didn't. I didn't like to date.
Emisha Gormley
I remember the first time you showed me Stuber. We were at. Who was that? Spring fling party. And I remember Stuber. This was before Molly gave him, like, a wardrobe makeover. He's gonna kill us for this. But I remember someone wanted to set you up with him.
Molly Sims
Well, I had. I hadn't seen him. I'd gone to this, by the way. I went. Because of your ass. I. I went to a Golden Globes. Was it. Yeah, it was Golden Globes viewing. Whatever. Golden Globes. We saw the globes. And then we went to. I think it was a CAA after party at Sunset Tower. You like the hairdresser?
Emisha Gormley
I had a crush on a hairdresser.
Molly Sims
He was cute, though.
Emisha Gormley
Cute. He had a British accent.
Molly Sims
Yeah, he had British accent. Yeah, he was. He was hot. I was tired. I wanted to go home. And I'm standing by the bathroom and I see Scott Steuber. And he was like, hey. And I was like, hey. Anyway, we chit chat. I don't really think of anything of it. But anyway, I sat and he. I was like, oh, what do you got going on? You know, in Hollywood, you're always like, things are great. My movie's great, my TV show's great, whatever. And I don't know, I didn't leave thinking anything. And I just. I said something. I was like, oh, I'm doing this, I'm doing that. And I was like, oh, well, you know. He was like, who are you with? Joanne Wiles? I was like, call Joanne, my agent at the time.
Who?
Amazing. And sure enough, like, a couple of weeks later, she was like, oh, you have an appointment with Scott Stuber.
Emisha Gormley
Whatever.
Molly Sims
And I was like, oh. And he was like, you're gonna do drinks at Chateau. I was like, really? But I lived at the back, so I could always go up and whatever. But I leave there and I do. I call you. I call you. I'm like, I just had the best. It was that. I just had the best, like, time. Anyway, he emailed me.
Emisha Gormley
I remember seeing him at the spring fling. And I was like, you can't go out with him. He has tube socks on.
Molly Sims
Yeah, he had tube socks on.
Emisha Gormley
That was white tube socks, sneakers. I was like, no, no, no, no.
Molly Sims
No, no, yeah, he's great. And he was so good. Because I'd never like, dated, like, a suit, right? Like, I dated, like. Like, hipsters or whatever, but he. He looked hot. And suit. He still looks hot on the suit. But, yeah, he. And I was like, there's no. I was coming out at such a shitty relationship. I'm like, I cannot get into another relationship. And so I ended up dating that whole year. I was actually kind of. I really liked this one guy, and then he broke up with me, and then the other one was fun. That was fun. That was fun.
Emisha Gormley
And then that was right after. And then you started dating. And then I was actually there when they had their first kiss. And we went to Cabo.
Molly Sims
Then we went to Cabo, and he just built the house. He, Lauren and Pat and Pat.
Emisha Gormley
And we. I remember everybody was like, we were there with a bunch of girlfriends, and Molly and Scott disappear, and I'm like.
Molly Sims
Do you know, I told the kids, I'm like, I kissed your daddy behind that fireplace. I literally thought Scarlett was gonna fall down. She was like, what?
Emisha Gormley
That was where. And we were all waiting patiently. We were like, ugh. Are they, like, making out right now for the first time? Like, should we go?
Molly Sims
We were.
Emisha Gormley
And they were making out for the first time.
Molly Sims
And that was.
That.
Emisha Gormley
That was the start of it. And then that was it. I mean, you dated for like, what, a year and a half before you got engaged?
Molly Sims
Yeah, about a year and a half. But I knew. But did I know?
Emisha Gormley
How did you know?
Molly Sims
Because I wasn't crazy.
Emisha Gormley
Well, I've acted different, but.
Molly Sims
Thanks.
I'm acting at you. I don't know. I. I don't know. He was very calming for me.
Emisha Gormley
He was the first time you dated a man?
Molly Sims
Yeah. He had a calendar. He had a schedule. He was like, okay, I'll. Do you want to go out next Friday? I'm, like, thinking about where the fuck I'm going to be next Friday. But sure. You know, it was very odd for me. He didn't text and call and, like, it wasn't like. He just.
Emisha Gormley
He was a man.
Molly Sims
He was very much just took charge. Took charge. And that was not what I was used to.
Emisha Gormley
I mean, I think that's so funny because I think. I mean, I met Mike. You guys were.
Molly Sims
Well, hold on. Everybody met you and Clay. Catherine and I were talking about Catherine and Marty. You and Clay.
Emisha Gormley
I met. I met Stuart before you did.
Molly Sims
Yeah.
Emisha Gormley
So I was dating this guy for a couple years who was younger than I was, and I was in la and we worked. I worked at this place called Starworks that doesn't exist anymore. And our friend Kat Bowen, now Kat Bowen, at the time, she was Katherine Fieldkamp, was dating this guy, Marty Bowen.
Molly Sims
And was a producer in Hollywood.
Emisha Gormley
He was a producer and still is.
Molly Sims
His best friend, Scott Stuber.
Emisha Gormley
I remember going to Kat's house with Marty for the Oscars. We were gonna watch the Oscars and just. They were having people over and the boys were having like a poker game. And I remember Scott walking in and I was like, oh, this is so nice. And he was with whatever girl he was dating. And all the boys went and sat. And I remember, like, I vividly remember hanging out with Kat and this group of girls from LA that I didn't really know other than Kat. But yes, I met Stuber before, technically, you guys.
Molly Sims
And I had known Stuber cause his producing partner, who is an incredible producer. Her name is Mary Parent. Love you, Mary. I always thought he was with Mary because they lived with him. Like, I never. Like, I didn't really kind of get it. And anyway, they ended up running Universal together. But yeah, I. It was so. We were so not. I mean, I knew of him, but I didn't know him. And then we dated and I mean, we had our moments. But I think the good thing about having all of the ups and downs and ups and downs, I was very set on who I was. To your point. I wasn't hanging my head out of a fucking cheap Jericho. Like, I was very. I mean, I was very set on.
Emisha Gormley
You also knew what you wanted. You knew what you wanted.
Molly Sims
That's what I was saying.
Emisha Gormley
I knew what you wanted.
Molly Sims
Yeah. And, you know, it was a little bit of a tricky time in my life because I. At 35, I did wake up as we know, and wanted a family. And I was thinking about freezing my eggs, and I had a date, and I had a date, and I remember Lauren Kusterak. Don't do it. Do not tell him. He's definitely not gonna mar. And, you know, again, you know, I told him, I'm like, I'm gonna freeze my. I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna freeze my eggs.
Emisha Gormley
But, you know, I think that's the thing. It's like, so I met Mike. I'm 46. I met Mike. We've been together now for 13 years. Yeah, 13 years.
Sponsor/Advertiser
Married for.
Emisha Gormley
No, I've been together. We're 20, 25. We met and so. 14 years. We've been together for 14 years.
Molly Sims
What isn't.
Emisha Gormley
No.
Molly Sims
Oh, but We've been your anniversary.
Emisha Gormley
We're wedding anniversary.
Molly Sims
So we met.
Emisha Gormley
We started dating 14 years ago.
Molly Sims
Has it been that long?
Emisha Gormley
Jesus.
Molly Sims
The almond.
Emisha Gormley
And we met at Almond. I was not in the mood to go out. And this is. This is another. This is another little, little just tidbit. I was not dressed for the nines. I was wearing a pair of tie dyed crappy shorts, a white T shirt, a baseball hat. I did not a lick of makeup on. My hair at the time was down to here. And I just wore a Yankees baseball hat. And Lauren Kuserak and Mimi Brown and I had these shitty rental in the Hamptons, the shittiest. And literally when I tell you was not in the mood to go out, I was like, I don't want to go out. Lauren's like, we are going out. We're going to Bobby Vance. And I was like, fine, we'll go to Bobby Vans with all the geriatrics. So we go to Bobby Vans, we have a shrimp cocktail. I'm like, this sucks. Let's, like move on. Worst mood ever. So then we move over to Almond, which, by the way, it was Saturday night, not Friday night. Cause apparently Friday night is gay night.
Molly Sims
Yeah, it was gay night.
Emisha Gormley
Everyone was like, did you meet him on Friday? Is he gay? And I was like, he's not gay.
Molly Sims
We met on Saturday.
Emisha Gormley
Anyhow, I start talking to this guy at the bar, and Lauren Kuserak, God bless her, was having a wine tasting to herself. Because she does not just order a glass of wine. She's like, can I try 17 glasses of Chardonnay? And she will knock them into a bottle. She'll just buy a glass. So, like, these poor people behind the bar, like, pouring her 19 glasses of Chardonnay to taste test. Then she'll switch to rice.
Molly Sims
And she'll switch to rice.
Like, actually, she just does a big.
Emisha Gormley
Smile on her face. And she's like, actually, can I just have like, you know, the cab. And please note, coming off of meeting Mike, I had dated this cheap guy that I had to pay for everything. So I start talking to this guy at the bar, and he's with his friends, and he's a single guy. And ultimately what ends up happening is he ends up joining Lauren, Mimi and I for dinner. Lauren loves him. Right away, she's like, he ordered a great bottle of red.
Molly Sims
I'm like, great.
Emisha Gormley
He ends up buying all of us dinner. And I'm like, oh, who is this guy? Like, what's happening here?
Molly Sims
I didn't know that.
Emisha Gormley
And we end up I end up saying, fine, I'll drive him home. Because I was, like, not really drinking that night, and I was driving. So, long story short, we end up going out on a real date two days later, and that was it. And I will say one of the funniest things to me to this day. And I gave this piece of advice to. I won't name her, but my babysitter, and she's been dating a guy for a couple of months. And she was like, it's time to kind of have like a little bit of a talk. And I said, oh, my God, don't have the talk. Well, so here's the deal. But you have to be clear on what you're.
Molly Sims
She's 36.
Emisha Gormley
I was at the time 33. And I looked at Mike and it was right after Molly's wedding. And I go, just so you know, like, if you ever, like, decide, like, you. You're, like, not really that into me, you just want to keep dating me, like, you don't see a future with me, just pull the plug.
Sponsor/Advertiser
I'll be fine.
Emisha Gormley
But, like, I want to get married, I want to have kids. And what I will say, and this is what I said to my. My. My babysitter, if you have that conversation and it scares him away, he wasn't your person.
Molly Sims
No.
Emisha Gormley
Because Mike, they might get annoyed and be like, ugh, that's kind of.
Molly Sims
You just have to pick your. You have to pick your moments. You have to pick your time. Because when you say, hey, can we talk?
Emisha Gormley
Yeah. That way they all freak out.
Molly Sims
They'll freak. Even Scott was like, what do you.
Emisha Gormley
Want to talk about? But I will say, if they're the right person, all it does is make them self reflect. It doesn't scare them away. They might get annoyed. Because Mike will tell you to this very day that when I said that to him, he was annoyed. He was like, really? Like, that's what you're going to say to me? But I'm like, yeah, but guess what? You didn't dump me. And we're married and have three kids. So if it's the right person, nothing you say in that realm will scare them away.
Molly Sims
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Emisha Gormley
On Lipstick on the Rim we sat down with the one and only Rachel Zo and wow, this episode is a ride. We talked about everything. Motherhood, divorce, finding herself again, joining Real Housewives literally overnight. And then she said this.
Rachel Zoe
Can I tell you a true story in Covid? In the darkness of COVID.
Emisha Gormley
I had.
Rachel Zoe
A cat eye every single day where nobody saw me. Not one soul. And when I had Covid, not even my ex husband saw me or my children. And you know what I did? I went into my bathroom, I did a black liquid liner, put on lashes, black liner in the waterline, a full lip, did my hair and sat in my bed. And that is what I did. And I looked at myself and I said, you are not a well person. I said, are you fucking okay? You have 104 fever.
Emisha Gormley
You are like.
Rachel Zoe
You are like contagion right now.
Emisha Gormley
If you love fashion, beauty or Bravo, this Rachel Zoe episode is a must. It's out now.
Molly Sims
At the end of the day, what you want might be different than what they want.
Emisha Gormley
Totally.
Molly Sims
And you know, you see your friends and you see your girls who will just accept the worst of the worst. Oh, I don't want kids. Really? You talked about having five kids, right? You'll say things because that's what they want. That is a Very slippery slope. The guy who's dating you who will not commit, who will not year after year, like, like again, I'm not saying it won't work out, but at one point, at a certain age, you do have to have the talk and you do have to walk.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah, I think it's, there's, there's, there's certain red flags. If you're dating a guy who's, you know, in their 40s and they've never been in a serious relationship, they have Peter Pan syndrome. Time to run. Time to run.
Molly Sims
Not always, you know, because I, my people always said, I'm like, he's such a player. I'm like, of course he's a player. He's fucking six, four and hot. Why wouldn't he be a player?
Emisha Gormley
Yeah, but he had shown that he could commit. I'm talking that. No, don't know how to commit. They're like, they've never been in a long term relationship. They've never been engaged or they've been. I'd rather have a guy that's divorced with three kids that can show me that they're able to commit than someone that's 45 and never actually had a relationship longer than six months. I do think that dating has shifted so much, and I will say I am. I, I, I really hope we're seeing the pendulum swing back in so many ways with social media and there's like a backlash against phones with kit for younger kids. I do think a lot of people.
Molly Sims
Are getting off the apps.
Emisha Gormley
I think dating has to go back to that face to face human connection of you meet someone at a bar. Like, that was my most fond memories of dating were like going to a bar and like seeing someone. That cat and mouse game, right? Where you like catch someone's eye and then there's like, like a moment and then, oh, wait, like, are they gonna like come and talk to me or should I talk to them and do I or is he gonna ask me out? That I think is lost on a whole generation of people because it's all now down to the phone and a swipe to the left or a swipe to the right.
Molly Sims
There's not a timeline.
Emisha Gormley
There's no timeline.
Molly Sims
I think a lot of girls. That's what made me think about the 36 comment. Like, sometimes people don't want to get married until they're 46. Right. It has nothing to do with the girl or the boy. Like, a lot of dating is timing. Are you at the right time at the right place and Are they at the right time, at the right place? And do your values align? Like, a lot of times, you know, I don't know. Had I met a couple of the guys that I dated, and I dated some great guys, so maybe later on in life it might have worked. But I didn't live in the same country. You know, we had different things going on. So I don't just think it's. And I think another thing is, like, if it's meant to be, it's meant to be. That is just something that you tell yourself. If it's meant to be, it will be.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah, I agree with that.
Sponsor/Advertiser
Right.
Molly Sims
But I think for me, the mistakes that I made, I always would be like, no, but he's great. No, but he's a awesome. No, he doesn't really, you know, drink too much and. You know what I mean? Like, I would always try to see the better side.
Emisha Gormley
Or, you're not changing anyone.
Molly Sims
I thought I could.
Emisha Gormley
I think that's like, the biggest thing is that you. You have to go into whomever you're marrying, whatever you commit to, you cannot go into it saying, I love this person the way they are, but I'm going to change this aspect of them. It's not gonna happen. It's not. And if you're trying to change them and you can't live with what you're trying to change, then don't get married.
Molly Sims
Or you see the girls who are like, well, he does this and this and this and this and this. And you're like, well, then he's probably not right for you. Like the girls who always complain and you're like, because it's not right. Right. Like, I did that. I wouldn't complain so much. I would just try to make it right. Right. By changing me or changing my behavior or changing my habits or. But I do think aligning on a lot of values early on, it does make a difference.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah. I think that it helps with when you raise your children together that you. You don't want to be at odds with the values that you think are important compared to what the other person thinks are important as you raise these kids.
Molly Sims
And guess what? Divorce. It's okay.
Emisha Gormley
It's okay.
Molly Sims
You know what? But you can also meet the love of your life, spend 15, 20 years together, have beautiful babies, have incredible babies together, and it's a win. And it doesn't mean it's supposed to be forever. Like, I don't know that. I think that you can only have one true love in your life. Like, I Have had so many incredible loves in my life, I think. Yeah, I. I think there's a difference.
Emisha Gormley
In getting married when you're older in the sense that you are more assured and confident in who you are, what you want, and what you don't want. So by the time you do get married, like we did, I was almost 35 when I got married. You were 39. Like, we knew we were pretty confident in who we were and what we wanted and what we didn't want. And I think that makes it a lot easier because we had gone through several different relationships that we learned more about ourselves from than anything else.
Sponsor/Advertiser
Yeah.
Molly Sims
I think the. The guys that you know also know themselves. Right. Like, the guys who don't get married, they probably don't get married for a reason because they know they don't. They can't get married.
Right.
Or they get out of something because they don't really want to stay in something. Not because they don't want to, but because they can't. Right. A lot of emotional baggage you bring into any relationship, and that baggage will. Will get unwrapped. I mean, it will. It will rear its great head and ugly head. Right?
Emisha Gormley
Yeah. I mean, I think it's one of those things that we're like, you know, I'm. I'm reading through some of our notes we have here. There is no timeline for it, but the one thing that you do have to do, it doesn't matter if you're 25, 35, or 55, you've always said this. If you're single, you have to treat dating like.
Molly Sims
Like a job.
Emisha Gormley
You have to put yourself out there. You have to work at it. You have to make an effort. You have to show up, show up at the bar, find yourself friends that are single to go out with. Like, I cannot handle listening to someone tell me that they are single and miserable. But they don't put the work in. No one is going to land in your lap. I met Mike because I put myself out there. I dated you, met Scott because you put yourself out there. It's like anything in life, you have to. You want something, you have to work for it. And it's not saying once you're in that relationship, you have to keep working at it. But I think that you can't give up on yourself and you can't go, oh, I'm too old, or I'm too this or.
Molly Sims
And listen, what?
Emisha Gormley
All my friends are married.
Molly Sims
What means something to one person you might not care about totally if he doesn't Text me when he gets home. If he doesn't, call me when he gets home. That might not bother you, but it bothers me. Like, don't accept things early on that, you know, later on, because that's. That's the mixed messages. Well, it didn't bother you for three years, right? And you haven't. You know what I mean?
Emisha Gormley
Like, it makes a difference. And sometimes it's not about finding the right person, but it's about becoming the version of who you are and who's ready for them then. Right. I think that's something that is really, really, really important because we have this vision in our head of, like, this is the right person for.
Sponsor/Advertiser
For me.
Emisha Gormley
And I don't.
Molly Sims
I never.
Emisha Gormley
I will wholeheartedly say I never thought about. I need him to do this or be this or look like this. Like, I don't think I ever had that. I never had an expectation of what my husband would look like or be like. I just knew I wanted someone that reflected probably, honestly, a lot of the values that I got from my dad. And I feel like ultimately, like, I look at Mike, and so much of what I see in Mike and respect in Mike is what I have always looked up to in my dad. Also.
Molly Sims
The past, heartbreaks, lessons. Everything had a purpose, right? Everything you go through, but you're not behind. You're not broken. You're not out of time. One of our best friends met the love of her life at 52 years old. They've been together now for 12 years, and she could not be happier.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah, totally. Do you believe in the right person? Wrong time theory? And it's so funny because I actually thought about this recently. I don't believe that the right person. It's not like, oh, that person never came. I think you can meet the right person for you at that time, but they might not be the person for you because it's the wrong time. Does that make sense? Like, I think, you know, I remember dating Clay, for example. I love Clay. Loved Clay. Like, and he's a good egg, and his family's great, and he's married and has beautiful babies now. But in that point in time, we were in very different places, and he was the right person.
Molly Sims
Also. He was younger.
He was younger than the right.
We both dated younger. That did not work for me. I felt like I was like, mother.
Sponsor/Advertiser
Yeah.
Emisha Gormley
I felt like I was a mom. And at the end of the day, I think it's really important to just think about it. I don't really think there's Ever. Like, oh, I met this person and it was just the wrong time. And maybe if we meet up later in life, it'll be different. I think that person was what you needed at that point in time. And the timing just meant he wasn't the person or she wasn't the person for you long term. And I think that shift in thinking is really important because there are different people for different phases of our life.
Molly Sims
Oh, my God, yes. And I think that's where if you're not in a hurry and you can just, you know, slow down, have a good time, try not to get so crazy you'll realize, like, it will one day you'll wake up and you're like, this isn't that hard, right?
Emisha Gormley
And be open. Just be open. Because you never know. Like, I think that.
Molly Sims
And if they do something wrong, it's not the end of the world, you know? Do you know how many times Mike and Scott fuck up on a daily basis?
Emisha Gormley
I mean.
Molly Sims
I mean, it's.
Emisha Gormley
We pick our battles now.
Molly Sims
You pick your battles. That's another thing, girls. Not everything can be an act. Not everything can be. God, we sound old. I mean, but I'm just saying. Don't. I mean, they'll be like, I'm over you.
Emisha Gormley
I do think I will say this. I think that the older you are, the harder. The more you get settled in your ways, and the harder it is to then let someone into your life. So I think that if you are dating in your 40s or you've been single for a long time, be patient with the other person. Because I have seen this happen where little things start to frustrate and it becomes a bigger thing in the relationship than it needs to be.
Molly Sims
Like, he's never picking up his clothes.
Emisha Gormley
It's just.
Molly Sims
I don't understand. The basket is seven inches from his pants.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah.
Molly Sims
And his. Not tube socks. Cause I won't let him wear them anymore. But colored socks. And it just can't go into the hamper. Like, it. They're like, what? They're next to it.
Emisha Gormley
It's cashmere argyle socks.
Molly Sims
Cashmere argyle socks. Can't go in to the hamper.
Emisha Gormley
Well, we. We.
Molly Sims
You know what? He does something like really cute now and be like, okay, just tell me what to wear.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah, yeah.
Molly Sims
He pulled out a checkered blue and white. And he was. I was like, no. And he was like, it's Tom Ford. I'm like, listen, Tom Ford didn't know he made that.
Emisha Gormley
And let people know, by the way.
Molly Sims
It was terrible.
Emisha Gormley
You really gave I remember Molly slowly, slowly, ever so slowly, redoing his wardrobe. She would go to Barney's, and she'd be like, I just took all that out, and I put this in. And it was like a slow. Like. I think he walked. It was like Cinderella, like, makeover. Like, truly, like, he didn't realize.
Molly Sims
I was like. Because he's not good. He's never.
Emisha Gormley
He's been great.
Molly Sims
He's not good with athleisure. He just, like, loves an Arizona shirt.
Emisha Gormley
I mean, have you seen Mike's Buffalo Bills?
Molly Sims
Yes.
Emisha Gormley
He has a lot of T shirts.
Molly Sims
I'm like, or it'll be like, El Dorado. Arizona. Arizona.
Emisha Gormley
And I'm like, we have a lot of Villanova gear in our house.
Molly Sims
We have a lot of Arizona.
Emisha Gormley
Well, we haven't talked about our dating in a long time, and I kind of think it was very fun.
Molly Sims
I know.
Emisha Gormley
It was so fun reliving our glory days. I love you, wild child.
Molly Sims
Our dating. But listen, don't think that both of us did not have tears and heartbreak.
We did.
Emisha Gormley
But that's part of what makes it fun. That's part of what makes it worthwhile. Because then when you meet the right person, you're like, oh, that's what it's supposed to be like.
Molly Sims
My mom had to come and live with me for, like, a couple months because I was so. I mean, catatonic. I was catatonic. I. Gary Scott Thompson. Thank you for not firing me. He was my showrunner and creator of Las Vegas. Thank you for not firing me. Because I could barely go to set.
Sponsor/Advertiser
I.
Molly Sims
But there were heartbreak. But the heartbreak also made everything else when you finally meet that person, like, you can't even. Can't even remember it.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah.
Molly Sims
Weird.
Emisha Gormley
And by the way, they always all come groveling back.
Molly Sims
Oh, let me tell you, they all always come back.
Emisha Gormley
They know. They know.
Sponsor/Advertiser
They know.
Molly Sims
Oh, they know.
Emisha Gormley
Well, you're my. You're my work wife.
Molly Sims
You're my. You're my work wife.
Emisha Gormley
You're my soul mates from 2002.
Molly Sims
2002. So someone posted a picture of, like, 2000s, and I'm like, God, I crushed the 2000s.
Emisha Gormley
We still look the same. I mean, in our heads.
Molly Sims
Dr. Levine, I'm getting my neck done. No. All right, well, love you. I hope this helps. You guys can DM us, ask us questions.
Emisha Gormley
Questions we're always here for.
Molly Sims
We do mentor a little bit of.
Emisha Gormley
Our girls, our young girls.
Molly Sims
Don't text back, wait, play it cool. Play it cool.
Make them pay.
And then they'll say, why do I have to play it cool? Why can't I just be me? Because you can't. You got to play the fucking game.
Emisha Gormley
Yeah. Cause someone else will.
Molly Sims
Someone else will. All right. We love you guys. Love you. Love you. Thanks for listening to Lipstick on the Rim with Molly Sims and My Ride or Die. Imesha Gormley. We are so excited to bring you guys along on this journey with us. You can find us on Instagram and TikTok Ipstic on the Rim and and at Molly B. Sims. Or you can go to my blog where you can dive just a little bit deeper into my favorite products, trends and more@mollysims.substack.com and don't forget to check out our video episodes on my YouTube channel, Molly Sims. This podcast is production with Sony Music. I wanted to give a special thanks to my team, Rosie Cummings, Kenna Ryan, Sophine Kevorkin and everyone at Sony Music. Don't forget to listen and follow wherever you get your podcast so you never miss out on the fun.
Sam.
This episode of Lipstick on the Rim dives into the intricacies, challenges, and joys of finding love—at any age or stage. Hosts Molly Sims and Emese Gormley candidly share their personal journeys to meeting their husbands later in life, breaking down myths about timelines and “being behind,” and offering actionable advice for listeners who are single, dating, divorced, or just feeling discouraged about finding their person. Their message is clear: It’s never too late, and the journey is uniquely yours.
The conversation is relatable, candid, and laced with humor—like best friends swapping stories over a glass of wine. Molly and Emese keep it real about heartbreak, dating disasters, and the joy of finally finding a relationship that fits. They reinforce throughout: your journey is yours, don’t compare to others, and most importantly, don’t give up or lose yourself in the process.
Listeners are encouraged to reach out and submit questions for future episodes, solidifying the supportive, girlfriend-to-girlfriend spirit that defines the show.