April 1991 Pop Culture: Susanna Hoffs, A Baby In A Basket (?) & Musicians Perving On Underage Girls

Summary

Listen To Sassy: Life In The 90s – Episode Summary

Episode Title: April 1991 Pop Culture: Susanna Hoffs, A Baby In A Basket (?) & Musicians Perving On Underage Girls
Hosts: Tara Ariano, Pamela Ribon, and David T. Cole
Release Date: July 15, 2025

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Introduction: A Snapshot of April 1991

The episode opens with the hosts diving into the eclectic pop culture landscape of April 1991. Christina sets the scene by mentioning the omnipresent Amy Grant's hit "Baby Baby" on the radio, the abrupt cancellation of Twin Peaks, and Johnny Carson's retirement from The Tonight Show. She humorously highlights these events by referencing a nostalgic arts and crafts project with cassette cases, encapsulating the era's unique blend of pop culture phenomena.

Christina (00:16):
"It's like a weird time. Thank goodness your favorite magazine gave you an arts and crafts project to do with one of your cassette cases."

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The Infamous "Baby Baby" Phenomenon

David humorously shares his enduring annoyance with Amy Grant's "Baby Baby," emphasizing its relentless airplay.

Dave (00:41):
"Boy. I just got a traumatic flashback with Baby Baby. That song was everywhere for so long and drilled so far into your brain..."

Christina elaborates on the song's pervasive presence, noting its inescapability in various public places.

Christina (00:55):
"Because it's not a Christmas song, but it sounds like it is... You're just in a gas station, grocery store, at a dentist's office. You're not escaping this song."

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Sassy Magazine's Redesign and Visual Vibe

Dave discusses Sassy magazine's redesign, critiquing the shift towards a more standardized and less edgy aesthetic. He notes the positive trajectory toward regaining its original independent zine look, albeit not fully matching the initial avant-garde style.

Dave (01:15):
"What now is slowly getting his visual vibe back. It's not quite at the independent zine level look they started off with..."

Christina humorously references a confusing feature about Deborah Gibson's boyfriend, highlighting the sometimes baffling content in the redesign.

Christina (01:51):
"It's about a dude who's got all the moose in the world in his hair... I never heard of Chris Cuevas before in my life."

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Debbie Gibson and Her Mysterious Collaborations

The hosts delve into Debbie Gibson's collaboration with a lesser-known artist, Chris Cuevas, discussing the obscure music video "Someday."

Tara (02:22):
"Someday."

Christina critiques the video's aesthetics and the disappearance of Chris Cuevas from the music scene.

Christina (02:56):
"I loved this song. I missed this song. This is such a good... I can't find him anywhere."

Dave humorously speculates on Cuevas's future, likening him to characters from Goodfellas.

Dave (03:10):
"I think he could either be the kid that makes money doing low level jobs for the mob... or the middle management mob guy controlling people like Spider."

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Character Analysis: The "Shemp" Archetype

Tara introduces the concept of the "Shemp," a unique character archetype prevalent in the magazine's content, humorously defining their traits and lifestyle.

Tara (04:22):
"Sassy glossary. Definition number 37 is for the word shemp. Noun, meaning a young male alienated from society... prescription glasses."

Dave dismisses the term's authenticity, while Christina playfully suggests it targets writer Mike.

Dave (05:14):
"Not a phrase anybody has ever used it makes no sense."

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Richard Grieco and "COVID of Seventeen"

The discussion shifts to Richard Grieco's features in COVID of Seventeen, where Christina lists his "cheesier aspects," adding humor and critique.

Christina (05:28):
"He doesn't even have a Wikipedia page."

Tara and Dave debate Grieco's magazine appearance, highlighting his fleeting fame and connection to other celebrities like Emma Snowball and Cameron Diaz.

Tara (06:00):
"He was just on the COVID of Seventeen..."

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Emerging Music Scenes: Olympia's Influence

Christina explores the burgeoning music scene in Olympia, Washington, attributing its rise to influential bands like Bikini Kill, Sub Pop, and Nirvana. She connects this cultural hub to the magazine's coverage and the broader Gen-X movement.

Christina (06:33):
"All this shit was coalescing. Bikini Kill was forming, Sub Pop was starting to blow... they think that kind of blew up because they were very talented and contained."

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Celebrity Spotlights: Ice T, Judd Nelson, and Beyond

The hosts humorously critique headlines and celebrity features, including a mistaken photo caption of Ice T and Chris Rock.

Tara (07:40):
"Ice T and Judd Nelson together at last. Is the headline next to a photo of Ice T and Chris Rock? Extremely Not Judd Nelson at all, guys."

Christina discusses other celebrity features, touching on Sonic Youth's Dirty Boots video and its casting choices.

Christina (09:23):
"This was a big deal because they write, they never usually published their lyrics... Shiny Happy People was already a hit."

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Music Reviews: REM and Sting

The segment includes detailed reviews of songs by REM and Sting, with Christina and Tara expressing their opinions on the tracks.

Christina (09:10):
"One of the most annoying REM songs there is Me and Honey is so pretty."

Tara (14:13):
"Surreal, complicated, poetic, slow, hard to get close to the saddest album I have ever heard. Brilliant."

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Behind the Scenes: Features and Backstage Access

Christina shares her experiences writing a feature on backstage access, balancing the allure of meeting famous artists with the reality of behind-the-scenes work.

Christina (25:00):
"Our first feature. I hate going backstage. And it's a brag. It's a brag more than it's a brag... It's so boring."

Tara and Christina recount specific incidents, such as trying to get backstage passes for Aerosmith and Skid Row, highlighting the challenges and humorous moments encountered.

Tara (27:41):
"Well, she knew she would have a chaperone. You know, your honor."

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Upcoming Topics and Closing Remarks

The hosts tease the next episode, which will delve into the fashion of the April 1991 issue, eyelet swimsuits, and additional features like Shannon's appearance in COVID of Seventeen.

Tara (28:30):
"Next time. Game. We'll be talking about the fashion etc of the April 1991 issue eyelet swimsuits..."

They encourage listeners to engage via voicemail and text, welcoming feedback and sharing their enthusiasm for the Sassy community.

Christina (29:44):
"We love you. Please visit us at listen to sassy.com and Tara, I just want you to know no picture could ever capture how cute you are."

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Notable Quotes

• Tara (00:04): "That's disgusting."
• Dave (03:10): "He could either be the kid that makes money doing low level jobs for the mob... or the middle management mob guy controlling people like Spider."
• Tara (04:22): "Sassy glossary. Definition number 37 is for the word shemp..."
• Christina (27:47): "I am 15 and I am gorgeous. I will look 12. You will put two of me together."
• Dave (30:31): "One, two, wet. No. 1 to watch."

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Conclusion: A Nostalgic Journey

This episode of Listen To Sassy: Life In The 90s offers a nostalgic and humorous exploration of April 1991's pop culture through the lens of Sassy magazine. From dissecting pervasive pop songs and celebrity antics to analyzing emerging music scenes and backstage adventures, Tara, Pamela, and Dave provide insightful and entertaining commentary. The inclusion of memorable quotes and personal anecdotes ensures that both longtime fans and new listeners can appreciate the rich tapestry of Gen-X teen culture from the early '90s.

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For more episodes and detailed insights into the life and times of Sassy magazine, visit listentosassy.com.

Transcript

[Tara]

That's disgusting.

[Christina]

It is April 1991. Amy Grant's baby Baby is constantly playing on the radio. Twin Peaks just got canceled, and Johnny Carson's retiring from the Tonight Show. It's like a weird time. Thank goodness your favorite magazine gave you an arts and crafts project to do with one of your cassette cases. That'll help kill five minutes. Yes, it's time to listen to Sassy.

[Dave]

Boy. I just got a traumatic flashback with Baby Baby. That song was everywhere for so long and drilled so far into your brain that, yeah, it's taking up like, a half a percent of my brain still. You just awaken the dormant Baby Baby.

[Christina]

Because it's not a Christmas song, but it sounds like it is, like, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. And you're just. You're in a gas station, you're in a grocery store, you're at a dentist's office. You're not escaping this song.

[Dave]

What now? What now? What now? I complained a few weeks ago when they did their big redesign and when they started the redesign, they were very much like, that redesign has to follow the redesign Bible. And we. We shall not deviate. And everything is boring. And as pink and blue and white. And now. What now is slowly getting his visual vibe back. It's not quite at the independent zine level look they started off with when it was, like, a black background and sort of like, you know, there's those spooky bits everywhere and stuff like that we talked about. But it's getting better than it was when they redesigned it, so just wanted to point that out. Good job, Sassy.

[Christina]

If you turn your head all the way to the side, you will see Deborah's product. Deborah's Party. Deborah's Proteague. Deborah's Protigue. It's about a dude who's got all the moose in the world in his hair. He was previously Doogie Howser's best friend, but now he's Deborah Gibson's boyfriend. I'm very confused. Never heard of Chris Cuevas before in my life. But he did a song with Debbie Gibson. They made a video. It's called. The song is called. I've forgotten it already.

[Tara]

Someday.

[Christina]

Doesn't fucking matter. Someday. Thank you. I guess he went from Star Search to Debbie's Star and Hitched. Hitched on the coattails. This video also. Oh, my gosh, her hair is so moussed that it actually looks like she slept in spooge and, like, got all spiky on one side and it's gross on the other. This is a Sad thing. But if you go to the video, people are just like, I loved this song. I missed this song. This is such a good. I've never heard of it before, so. And I can't find him anywhere. I don't know what happened to him. That's hard. You had a song with Debbie Gibson and you have disappeared.

[Tara]

I can't believe this kid is 19. Because in this photo he looks both like he might be 12 and like he might be a 35 year old in a book of hairstyles at the barber shop.

[Dave]

I think he could either be the kid that makes money doing low level jobs for the mob. Like running around like a bag man.

[Tara]

Michael Imperioli in Goodfellas. Yes. Yes.

[Dave]

Or he is the middle management mob guy who is controlling people like Spider.

[Tara]

Yep.

[Dave]

Because he could go either way.

[Christina]

When they tell you drawing younger heads is harder than drawing adult heads because the proportions are wackadoodle. This kid's eyes are so low compared to the rest of his head. And then also, somehow his ears are bigger than the rest of his face.

[Dave]

Ears keep on growing until you die, Pam.

[Christina]

Yeah, but imagine what's happening. That's why we can't find him. He's just a pair of ears.

[Dave]

He's got what? He's got normal hair and I would say a normal hairline. Except he's then styled his hair. It looks like a straw broom. Coming from his normal hairline down to his brows.

[Tara]

Yes.

[Dave]

He makes a lot of vertical lines pointing out the length of his forehead, so it's not doing him any favors.

[Christina]

He doesn't even have a Wikipedia page.

[Tara]

That's hard.

[Christina]

On the Debbie Gibson page about their song. That's hard.

[Tara]

Wow. Sassy glossary. Definition number 37 is for the word shemp. Noun, meaning a young male alienated from society who detests trendiness, yet follows the independent music scene religiously. Despite not wanting to be stereotyped, the Shemp is very recognizable. His anti fashion look consists of plain black Converse high tops, black jeans, stylish stupid band T shirts, the ubiquitous flannel shirt and prescription glasses. The Shemp does zines, watches violent horror movies and dumb sitcoms, reads comic books, and is often an aficionado. Spelled wrong of pro wrestling. He subsists on American cheese and canned soup. And why did you not just go the whole nine and call this the Flaherty? Because this is the most targeted attack on writer Mike I've ever seen. Like, I'm just sure this is about him very much.

[Dave]

Not a phrase anybody has ever Used it makes no sense.

[Tara]

No. So you might as well just call it the Flaherty. Yeah, like clearly he knew this was about him. Like commit.

[Christina]

Here we have a helpful list. Five of Richard Grieco's cheesier aspects. Number one, Alice Band. And I wish it just said that five times.

[Dave]

I was about to ask what that is, but now I remember they talked about it in the previous episode.

[Tara]

There was a making it about it.

[Christina]

I. I was wearing one earlier today. Number two, Body curiously devoid of hair. Three. Lousy taste in magazines.

[Tara]

Four.

[Christina]

Four poorly executed nose job. And five. Spanking new jeans that just happened to be slashed across both knees.

[Dave]

What a poser.

[Tara]

Now I understand the poor taste in magazines. He was just on the COVID of17 in February 1991.

[Dave]

I thought it was because he like refused an interview or something.

[Tara]

Could have been both. Yeah, but he was on the COVID of Seventeen flanked by Emma Snowball, the girl who looks like Amy Smart but isn't. And Cameron Diaz.

[Dave]

Sounds like Sassy. Had a little trouble with their booker.

[Tara]

No.

[Christina]

They'Re booker. If you are listening back to back.

[Dave]

That is how I Zine of the.

[Christina]

Month Zine of the Month Pulp is put out by Chris and Justin, two trailer dwelling high school boys in Olympia, Washington. Christine asks, why are there so many cool people living in this backwater town? I do not know. This article made the paper. That's how cool everybody thought it was when Pulp was in Sassy to where Chris was like we were trying to get noticed as like the sassiest trailer dwelling boys in America and then they did this to us instead. I get a shit ton of mails from girls now like they all want to be my girlfriend. It's weird people wondering why is Olympia so cool? As Tara points out, people are still trying to figure that out. And I found one article where someone was saying like all this shit was coalescing. Bikini Kill was forming, Sub Pop was starting to blow. And then you had Nirvana and it was about to become huge. They were so young and they had like one place to hang out. And so that was where they had to like swap all their books and their music and their clothes and everything. And so that they think is the reason why it kind of blew up. Because they were very talented and contained.

[Tara]

Ice T and Judd Nelson together at last. Is the headline next to a photo of Ice T and Chris Rock? Extremely Not Judd Nelson at all, guys.

[Christina]

You know the resemblance.

[Dave]

Maybe he's just a very good actor.

[Tara]

Yes, maybe he's really captured the essence. Depending on how intense the person was that you bought your issue of Sassy from on ebay or yourself, if you still have your copy in the middle of what now is a Losing My religion cassette and CD liner/lyrics sheet. This was a big deal because as they write, they never usually published their lyrics. The other thing they never did was have Michael Stipe lip sync in videos. And he did for the first time in this and writes lip sync seemed like the greatest challenge I could throw up to myself to make it look good and make it look real and don't it up is what I would like to add about his lip sync. And then they talk about the Shiny Happy People video that he's about to go shoot. And Jane Pratt, of course, is in that as well. I think there's an article about her shooting it in a forthcoming issue, but I might be wrong about that.

[Christina]

We'll find out another one of these quotes. He says, I talked to Kate Pearson about singing together for years. She's everybody's favorite. I think she hung the moon. I called her up and she said she'd love to do it. So she does vocals on three songs, Me and Honey, Shiny Happy People and Country Feedback. I just want to say that Me and Honey is a much better song than Shiny Happy People.

[Tara]

Agree.

[Christina]

One of the most annoying after stand one of the most annoying REM songs there is Me and Honey is so pretty.

[Dave]

Yeah, Stand on Repeat sounds like he 30 dark zero kind of thing.

[Tara]

30 dark zero?

[Dave]

Is that what it's called?

[Tara]

No. Zero dark thirty. You were close. Cheering it up a little bit. At the bottom of the page we do have Cute Band alert and they're talking about the Dharma Bun.

[Christina]

Sorry I have to do my modern one.

[Tara]

Cute Band alert. Get your panties ready. Well, at the time of this issue, their average age barely breaks 21, but they are still around and still pretty cute. But they definitely look as old as that old lady who was throwing her panties at them. The end of it is besides being cute, the little bums are sincere and concerned about the decaying life of too many Portland teenagers, says Wendy, their publicist. No picture will ever capture how special they are. Oh, if anyone ever said that about me, I think I'd probably die. That's very sweet. And I would say there are a lot of pictures of them and they captured at least how cute they are then and now. So then up in the top right corner, we've got separated at birth. Keanu Reeves was supposed to be half of a French kissing couple in Sonic Youth's video for Dirty boots and he couldn't do it. And looking for a suitable replacement, Kim called her friend and our ex intern Daisy, who we saw looking cool as shit in the reader produced issue. She suggested Spike Jones. He is apparently now an incredibly in demand photographer. He claimed he could not afford the $298 flight to the audition in New York City even though he really wanted to do it. Guys, you know Sonic youth, you have $300. Surely fly him in. Give him a break. He surely knows people he could have crashed with. Look how cute he is.

[Christina]

They said he was psyched about making out on camera. That's very different than being psyched about being in a camera video. And the kid who got it is super cute. He's got like strong Wiley Wiggins in Dazed and Confused energy. This part where they kiss is total little Pam bait. And dirty boots is also a better song than shiny happy people.

[Tara]

Someone likes New Kids on the Block by sassy intern storm, age 17. I admit I like New Kids on the Block, probably because they are such nice people. I met them once when my friend Miata and I were in the gym scene of their I'll be loving you forever video. Anyway, I was excited to be going to an affair celebrating the publication of the book New Kids on the block. Pricey item, 39.95 in hardcover that has been on the New York Times bestseller list for months. Then why are they having a party now? Miata and I were at the party for about 20 minutes before the kids started arriving. They arrived two and three at a time, I guess to be less conspicuous to the girl fans waiting outside. Once they came, they were whisked off to a room where they did interviews with magazine after magazine. In the brief time I had with them, Jordan and Danny remembered Miata and me from the video. And it looked like Jon and Joe did too. Since then, Danny keeps calling Miata to ask her out. What can I say? We feel special. How old is Miata? If you are 17, I'm just, just wondering.

[Christina]

Danny, don't be loving her forever. Leave her alone.

[Tara]

By the way, unconscionable to sell a book like this, which was probably just a bunch of photos everyone had already seen from teen beat for 39.95. Doing that now would be too much in 1991. That is shocking. That was as much of as a pair of jeans.

[Dave]

I thought for a moment of just looping that for a while to see how long it would take. You guys would realize it was like three minutes long. You're like when Are we? Can we maybe best.

[Christina]

It's not as best.

[Dave]

What do you think?

[Christina]

It's not as best.

[Tara]

It's not. But it was one of the singles that is all this Time by Sting from the Soul Cages, our hit this month. And I'm just going to read this so that you can all agree with me. They can't let Catherine write reviews anymore, particularly not of artists we know from previous issues. She loves uncritically. Childhood fears, weird instruments, poor father, grieving son, A godless sea, mystical voyages, souls and lobster cages. Wait, I'm going to start reading this like Bob Duca. Death, shipyards, industrial accidents, angels. Perhaps the dream is dreaming us. Music that cries Oboes, mandolins, chanting, futility, repetitive rhymes Dreams, myths, folk tales, Loneliness I'm lost without you Dying fishermen, burial at sea all colors bleed to red. Sting's Coming Of Age album. Haunting, mystic, disconnected, elusive.

[Christina]

There's only nine tracks, very English, Ancient.

[Tara]

Surreal, complicated, poetic, slow, hard to get close to the saddest album I have ever heard. Brilliant.

[Christina]

I think I didn't know that this was a concept album about the death of his father.

[Tara]

Yes.

[Christina]

There you go.

[Tara]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Great. This has been a great segment.

[Tara]

That's Opera House with two A's in opera from Round the Outside. Round the outside by Malcolm McLaren and Karen. In your review, she gives us five pips as well, says this is his new style of music which he is called Opera House. And that track that we just heard was remixed later in the 90s and the used it for a British Airways ad. So if you've heard a different version of it called Arias in Air, that's what that's from. Obviously it's a real aria before it was either of those, but.

[Dave]

Yeah. So Opera House with two A's is just putting a beat track underneath existing well known opera pieces.

[Tara]

Yeah. Which weirdly, like when I. I've never listened to this album before, but when I was cutting that clip I was like, this is kind of working.

[Dave]

Is this before or after Sadness?

[Tara]

Before.

[Christina]

Before.

[Dave]

Okay. I feel like, okay, then we have this to blame for that then.

[Tara]

For sure.

[Dave]

Enigma. Is that the name of the band?

[Christina]

And then there's Deep Forest as well, which I think is you can hear coming out of this. I didn't know Round the Outside. Round the outside. So I went down that little rabbit hole to learn where this all came from. And I'll never know everything. I'd want to know about everything. Watched a whole video with the two that it was from square Dancing that you go around the outside. I Didn't know that. And then there's this Malcolm McLaren. White. He's just a white rapper person. He's doing his own thing about two girls going around the outside that then Eminem turned into two trailer park girls. So there you go.

[Tara]

Even before you hear his voice, you know that's David Lee Roth. That's A Little Ain't Enough from the album. A Little Ain't Enough. And I just. I mean, I admire David Lee Roth for deciding I want to be a particular kind of artist, and I'm going to do that every second of every day of my life. But I do also kind of want to hear. Hear what it would sound like if he tried to do a cover of, like, the Arms of the angel by Sarah McLaughlin or something like that.

[Dave]

Soul cages in the arms.

[Tara]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Ow. Here, I got something to make that last song better. Yeah, yeah.

[Christina]

I told. I told that story about my mom and David Lee Roth and Annie Van Halen. Oh, we lived in Palm Springs, California, the year, whatever, 1985 came out, right? That was the name of the album. 1985. 1984. Anyway, it was like the minute that jump was number, number one. The album's called 1984. It's early 1984. And my mom is checking in two gentlemen at the Hilton Riviera, putting his name in. And she's like, van Halen. Van Halen. She was like, this is familiar. She says to Eddie Van Halen, she said, do you play? I feel like my daughter would know who you are. Who I would have been at the time. 7. I just like what year it is. Like, I'm. I have. Or eight. I'm eight. She says, I feel like my daughter would know who you are. Are you in a rock band or something? And David Lee Roth, who's leaning against the counter, says, we play from time to time. My mom came home and told me all about it, and I was like, mom. She said, if Valerie Bertinelli had walked in, I would have known who he was. But she didn't. And they were in town to ride some ATVs.

[Dave]

Are you sure it wasn't him saying, we play from time to time?

[Christina]

That's how she knew it was Eddie Van Halen or it was David. David Lee Roth. Yeah. He was like, wow. And then that was it.

[Dave]

Where's the ice?

[Christina]

Not for teachers. About my mother.

[Dave]

What was the lyric right at the start?

[Christina]

Lay down about her Wet sheets.

[Dave]

That's what I said. Was it wet sheets or light? Okay. That's what I thought I heard. Yuck oh.

[Christina]

Oh, White.

[Dave]

Well, let's hear it. Hang on. I don't know. I'm hearing wet.

[Tara]

The sheets are white, like the moon.

[Christina]

I'm on Dave's side.

[Dave]

You know, the. The famously soggy moon.

[Christina]

Yes. You have full crescent wet.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Tara]

According to genius, it's wet. No.

[Dave]

Say again. It's what?

[Tara]

No, you're not going to entrap me with this. Christina hates Susannah Hoffs so much that it makes me think, like, did she step on your foot at a party at some point? Like, she's so mean. Vomity voice. Her voice is fine. I'll. I'll give her this. She sings in her range. She knows. She knows where her sweet spot is and she stays in it.

[Christina]

She calls my side of the bed pukey. I looked up the video. Is this D. McMurmy. He looked like.

[Tara]

It looked like him to me, too, but I couldn't confirm that. I tried to find out if they. I couldn't find out who it is and I couldn't find out.

[Dave]

Sorry, who do. Who are we talking about?

[Christina]

McMur. I just don't want to be wrong, so I say both of their names. Dilmick. McDermy. No, Dumont. McTougal.

[Dave]

Yeah. Remember that movie the Fly, where those two guys. And then there's a transporter accident and he became one person?

[Christina]

Yes. Julia Roberts will marry them both.

[Tara]

Anyway, I feel like it would have come up after he made it that he had been in this video, but it's not like it was a huge hint. So who knows? It may be him, it might not. We never get a clear shot of his face, so it's hard to say, but it definitely looks like him. I bought that, too.

[Dave]

One, two, watch.

[Christina]

Dave, do you know who this person is? Darren E. Burrows.

[Dave]

Absolutely. I know who. Of course.

[Christina]

Because of Ed. Because of Ed.

[Dave]

Only because of Ed from Northern Exposure.

[Tara]

That's all there is to know about him, I think.

[Dave]

You know, we always ask Dave, is, was he one to watch? And I know who he is, and I know his body of work, which is pretty much Northern Exposure. I mean, God bless him, but that was pretty much it for him. I know who he is, which is one of the things I like to judge. One to watch. And then the other one is prolonged success, which. No, no. So I'm going to say I'm going to err on the side of not diluting the one to watch pool and say he wasn't. Even though I definitely know who he is and I enjoyed him on Northern Exposure.

[Christina]

Yeah, I never watched Northern Exposure.

[Dave]

He plays the moose.

[Christina]

To where I thought you heard me say, because you watched that show Ed. That's how much I don't know about Northern Exp. I just got myself.

[Dave]

He was not Ed on Ed. He did. He just exclusively played characters named ed. He was Mr. Ed. He was. Wasn't there a Joey Triviani movie called Ed?

[Christina]

Yes.

[Dave]

A monkey.

[Tara]

Correct.

[Dave]

The monkey, yes.

[Christina]

Okay.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Christina]

I didn't know who he was until it said Crybaby. Said it was his best friend in Crybaby. And then I was like, oh, that's Hatchetface's boyfriend. That's how I know him. I see him every time I watch Crybaby.

[Dave]

He also played past tense in the English language.

[Christina]

Yes. And yes.

[Tara]

For such a short blurb, it's riddled with factual errors. Because in addition to him not being Johnny Depp's best friend in Crybaby, she also refers to his fa. His brother being in the movie the Untouchables. He does have a relative named Billy Drago, who plays Frank Nitty in the Untouchables, but that's his dad. It was not his brother.

[Dave]

I had no idea, though. He's a good. He's. He's really good in Untouchables. And as soon as you know his face, you're like, oh, that Billy Drago.

[Tara]

Okay, yes, he was definitely a hate sack guy on Fame Tracker, for sure. And when you know that Billy Drago is Darren E. Burroughs dad, you're like, you can definitely see the resemblance. But I don't know if, like, at some point they were trying to be fishy about, like, he's, you know, doesn't use his name or whatever. Yeah, but if part of his story is like, oh, it's fine for me to play Ed because I'm half Native American, like, well, in Billy Drago's obituary on Variety, they did not even seem sure that he was. That he was half indigenous, which even if he was, would only make Darren a quarter. A lot of people claim a lot of things. They did not. They said he was thought to be, but not that they knew he was so.

[Dave]

But also, like, there's lots of examples in families where you just. For sure your grandfather says something is taken as gospel, and then one day you're at 23. Me, you're like, whoa, yeah, huh.

[Tara]

Well, happened to Elizabeth Warren, so I guess it could happen to anybody. Burrows tried to get a Northern Exposure crowdfunding campaign going in the late teens.

[Dave]

What does that mean? I'm reading this, but I'm not quite sure. Was he going to make an episode with a hundred thousand dollars?

[Tara]

I don't know. What. Yeah, a hundred thousand three seconds of a moose. And that's exactly. You could not make an episode for a hundred thousand dollars. Never mind like a 10 episode season or whatever they were going for. But they. There was talk of it in the late teens, like in. There's a story from 2017 that like both of the creators and Rob Mora were attached, but it did not. Yeah, didn't go.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Tara]

It's probably for the best, definitely. But these days I found him on Instagram. He's making jewelry and engraving firearms and he also has a store on Etsy. And that's how I know. Now he lives in Branson. So now we're know.

[Christina]

Christina has written a feature. Our first feature. I hate going backstage. And it's a brag. It's a brag more than it's. It's a brag. Like she's like, it's you guys. It's so boring. You see famous people and then you kind of wait and they're at work. Like they're not there to party. They're at work and you're in their way. Which might be true, but still it's covered in all their backstage passes. She got. They got to go backstage. The B52s, the 10,000 Maniacs, Aerosmith and Skid Row Soundgarden. It's a pretty cool job. I don't know.

[Tara]

Yeah. I mean, I thought she was most eloquent when she was writing about the first bad experience, which was when she went to see Hothouse Flowers first of all, two nights in a row. So the first night she was like. I felt weird. But he said hi and he remembered me and it was nice. And then the next night I was truly like, what am I doing here? Because he was so spent. And I can understand that.

[Christina]

Yeah. But she calls other people waiting like dorks and stuff. Like. So she's trying to make herself cooler than the people who want to be there. That part makes me feel like. And then also you're never gonna have any fun near in front of backstage or around Natalie Merchant or the rem. So that wasn't a backstage problem. That was a. I was near. I was trying to look at Natalie Merchant problem. And she's crabby about it. There's a story about trying to get backstage for Aerosmith in Skid Row where she was chaperoning two 12 year old girls. They were desperate to meet Sebastian Bach. So one of them, her very Quote, very cool French mother called the show's promoter. I'm going back to France tomorrow and I've got to meet these guys. She told him, the dude goes, give me one good reason I should give you a pass. This mother says about her 12 year old, I am 15 and I am gorgeous. She got four passes to the box office. Now what?

[Tara]

Well, she knew she would have a chaperone. I mean, that's, you know, your honor.

[Christina]

Your honor. Tara said. And then Tara said, your honor.

[Tara]

I'm not saying I would do it on my own or anyone else's behalf, but, you know, if you want to be a cool mom.

[Christina]

I am 15 and I am gorgeous. I will look 12. You will put two of me together. Beautiful. Take me to your Sebastian buck. No, that's inappropriate. I'm glad they didn't find them awful.

[Tara]

Christina refers to seeing the guy who played the reporter in Batman backstage at a B52 show. That's Robert Wool. So have some respect for the future Arlist two dollar signs. But would not have thought he was a B52s guy. So that's interesting.

[Christina]

At least the picture of the or the scan of the Soundgarden VIP badge is so cool that I was like, this badge must be worth money. I bet it's worth hundreds. I clicked it and it is worth. Did you click $7250 on eBay currently. Who would pay that? Christina kept it. Oh my goodness.

[Tara]

Wow. That's crazy. This looks like shit. I'm sorry. If you spend $7,000 on this, you're crazy. You could buy three black debutante ball dresses.

[Christina]

You could get one really good facial.

[Tara]

Next time. Game. We'll be talking about the fashion etc of the April 1991 issue eyelet swimsuits. Blow by blow on everything that had to happen before Shannon made it onto the COVID And much more.

[Christina]

You can call us at 7:20. Sassy. Go leave us a voicemail or I don't know. I don't know. I don't. That's all you can leave. You can't leave a drawing.

[Tara]

You can't.

[Christina]

You can't leave your teeth.

[Tara]

They can text us.

[Christina]

Oh, you could text us. Don't tell me these people that I don't know. We can't be handling these texts. We have so many phone calls to get to. We are grateful for them. They are a lot of fun in our slumber party episodes. We love you. Please visit us at listen to sassy.com and Tara, I just want you to know no picture could ever capture how cute you are. Thanks so much for listening, and we'll catch you all next time.

[Dave]

One to watch. This one's one to watch.

[Christina]

Yeah, go ahead, Dave. Go ahead. I was just gonna key it up with. Do you know, Go ahead. It's fine, Dave.

[Dave]

All right, I'll say one to watch, and then you can do whatever. Okay?

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Okay. Wet.

[Christina]

Wet sheets.

[Dave]

One, two, wet. No. 1 to watch.