Listen To Sassy: Life In The 90s

Episode: July 1991 Fashion Etc.: Red, White & Blue (And Gray)

Release Date: January 6, 2026
Hosts: Tara Ariano, Pamela Ribon, David T. Cole

Episode Overview

In this lively and irreverent episode, the Listen To Sassy crew dives into the July 1991 issue of Sassy Magazine, exploring the holiday-themed fashion spreads, DIY disasters, beauty tips, back-to-school style previews, and the unforgettable “most embarrassing menstrual moment” contest results. Along the way, they reflect on the magazine’s editorial choices, the fashion sensibilities of the era, and their own ‘90s teen memories. The episode brims with the hosts’ trademark humor and deep affection for (and teasing of) Gen-X nostalgia.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The July 1991 Cover & Model Interview

[02:49–04:14]

• Model Rochelle’s Interview:
  • Rare to see a Black model featured on Sassy’s cover.
  • Rochelle rebuffs the Fourth of July theme:
    • “January 1st is more of an Independence Day for me because that’s when the Emancipation Proclamation was signed. Oh, get it? Rochelle. Rochelle.”
  • Hosts praise her for shutting down the “pro-America” line of questioning.
• Fashion Details:
  • Flag-print bustier and pants.
  • The interview shifts focus to her makeup and outfits after she resists forced patriotism.

Pam (03:50): “One of the few Black models on the cover of Sassy, really shutting down this line of inquiry. They’re like, well, here’s what makeup she was wearing, I guess.”

2. Fashion Feature #1: "Gray Matters"

[04:14–08:18]

• All About Gray:
  • 'Gray' as July’s color trend, with pieces (jokingly) indiscernible in black-and-white photos.
  • Photography and styling critiqued for muddiness and lack of clarity.
• Photo Layout Woes:
  • Confusing captions (“left girl” / “right girl”) and directionality.
• Runaway Outfits:
  • Wild accessories: rope, branches, and a silver knife from Tiffany, perplexing the hosts.
• EVERGLADES PHOTO SHOOT:
  • Models shot among Florida’s giant flora and fauna, with unexplained props.
• Sassy Beauty Tip:
  • Avon Skin So Soft as an Everglades mosquito repellant.
  • Pam recalls knowing that from “the ‘90s but not because of Sassy.”

Dave (05:03): “She fell down from the crow’s nest on a ship and just, like, gathered ship-related detritus. Ropes, rigging, pulleys. And then she landed in a car.”

Pam (08:17): “It really does work and it’s better – like kids will wear it because it doesn’t smell, you know, chemically.”

3. Fashion Feature #2: "Burn, Baby" (Flag Prints and Americana Overload)

[10:29–13:08]

• Americana Overdrive:
  • Garments saturated in flag print, worn by a second Black model (again, evidently reluctant).
  • A “Flavor Flav poofy American flag hat” ridiculed for looking ridiculous.
• Unflattering Styles:
  • Hosts joke that the looks are only fit for a rave or an Austin Powers party scene.
  • Noted lack of wearability or aspirational impact for Gen-X teens.

Pam (11:28): “They make her look ridiculous because she’s got all her hair piled up on top of her head. And then they, like, just perch a Flavor Flav American flag square poofy hat on the top of it. It looks so stupid.”

Andrea (12:52): "These American flag shorts, everything is silly. Every hat dumber than the last."

4. DIY Disaster: "Dress Yourself"

[15:18–17:01]

• Home-sewn Dress Instructions:
  • Hosts skewer the “Make a dress out of T-shirt and skirt” project for “ruining two garments.”
  • Bad construction impossible to hide, even in the magazine photo.
  • Universal sentiment: few readers could make such an outfit look good (or even wearable).

Andrea (16:23): “You have ruined two outfits.”

Pam (16:39): “You can – they can’t hide the construction mistakes … you’ve on-here-waisted this thing … just stuck a sack with sleeves.”

5. Back to School Preview: Summer’s End Looms

[17:01–19:26]

• Bandana prints out, plaid in; but both mocked for looking dated or dowdy.
• Plaid blazers: Get a pass for Beverly Hills 90210 vibes but most pieces feel “miserable” or outdated.
• Desert boots: Reminisced as a coveted item.
• Red plaid bomber jacket/shorts set: Hosts call it “Clueless before Clueless.”

Pam (19:26): “Plaid for back to school. Groundbreaking. Classic.”

6. Short Beauty Tips: “Take it Off/Beauty Credos”

[19:26–24:07]

• Hot Weather Makeup Advice:
  • Wash your face “whenever you’re slick” — criticized by Pam for its lack of realism.
  • “Try not to wear so much makeup in the summer. It’s hot.”
• Yogurt Mask DIY:
  • Suggested as a universal soother, but Pam recounts disastrous lactic-acid-fueled rashes.
  • Hosts joke about sheep’s milk (“a.k.a. Greek yogurt”) and dubious “SPF 13” City Block sunblock.

Pam (20:58): “It’s hot out. Wear less of it.”

Andrea (21:48): “When you do this and you’re a Pam, the lactic acid in yogurt – flames on the side of your face … you turn bright red and rashy and it hurts.”

7. Zits and Stuff: The Fake Tan Conundrum ("Carrot Juice Myth")

[24:36–24:08]

• Advice letter suggests “drink carrot juice every day to get some color.”
• Hosts debunk (and joke about) the claim, recounting “carrot palms” and orange skin.
• Echo broader trend: magazine beauty and health advice is only sometimes grounded in reality.

8. Sassy-branded Products & Gen-X Ephemera

Sassaby (Caboodles ripoff organizer)

[24:40–26:14]

• Hosts call it an “unnecessary lunchbox that lets you have fewer things organized.”
• Bizarre Egyptian-style branding called out.

Andre Agassi’s Fan Club

[26:14–27:18]

• Two-page spread for tennis pro Andre Agassi’s fan club.
• Dumbfounded at his popularity among teen girls in 1991.

Sassy Board Game:

[27:18–28:07]

• Double-page ad for “the Sassy Experience.”
• No one on the podcast has played it, but interest in remote play is piqued.

9. Icarus Magazine Ad

[28:07–29:27]

• “Serious, not boring” quarterly targeting teens with gritty topics (apartheid, street gangs, war).
• Hosts poke fun at the heavy-handed messaging and the presence of a mime in the ad.

Andrea (29:27): “Who put the mime in there? Who put the mime in there?”

10. Period Stories: Playtex's Most Embarrassing Menstrual Moments Contest

[31:17–34:51]

• Prizes Awarded: Winner receives $1000; runners-up, $125.
• Winning Stories: Range from tampons mistaken for sinus inhalers, to performances in see-through leotards, to a dog presenting a guest with a used pad at a dinner party.
• Hosts read and riff on each in turn, connecting with universal menstruation embarrassment.
• Notable quote from a grand prize winner’s reaction: “At that moment, I would have preferred death.” (34:43)

11. Mail Order Modeling School Scams and True Crime Sidebar

[35:42–40:52]

• Modeling Scam Awareness: Feature on the pitfalls of mail-order “modeling schools” and related rip-offs.
• Follow-up on the author: Hosts recount their research and discover “Patty Farrel,” the modeling advice author, was later infamously involved in a wedding-crash, revenge, and internet harassment scandal (incl. doctored photos and iguana references).
• The story’s escalation and bizarre email to her ex-boyfriend and police (“thank you for sending the two delicious detectives over today … he hopped away with only a part of a leg and several fingers missing”) is a highlight.

Andrea (39:04): “How is this not a movie? Pam, please write this.”

12. Tarot Hotlines, Alternative Schools, and Letters Section

[41:02–45:47]

• Alexandra’s tarot line ad dissected for its misleading photo and multi-purpose phone line (tarot, Chinese horoscope, moon sign).
• A letter from a girl attending a tiny, alternative “Harmony” school in Indiana spurs research and classic Sassy-style aspiration/critique.

13. Closing and Preview

[45:56–47:32]

• Next episode will be a mega “slumber party” covering Sassy’s quizzes from June and July ‘91.
• Listeners are encouraged to call in with their Sassy stories.
• Social handles (now on Bluesky), and sign-off in true, breezy Sassy fashion.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Pam (03:50): “One of the few Black models on the cover of Sassy, really shutting down this line of inquiry.”
• Dave (05:03): “She fell down from the crow’s nest on a ship and just, like, gathered ship-related detritus. Ropes, rigging, pulleys.”
• Andrea (12:52): “Every hat dumber than the last … they all look like they should be in the background of a party scene in Austin Powers.”
• Andrea (16:23): “You have ruined two outfits.”
• Pam (19:26): “Plaid for back to school. Groundbreaking. Classic.”
• Andrea (21:48): “[Yogurt mask] … lactic acid in yogurt – flames on the side of your face … you turn bright red and rashy and it hurts.”
• Andrea (29:27): “Who put the mime in there? Who put the mime in there?”
• Pam (34:43): “At that moment, I would have preferred death.”
• Andrea (39:04): “How is this not a movie? Pam, please write this.”

Timestamps For Important Segments

| Time | Segment | |----------|-----------------------------------------------------------| | 02:49 | Rochelle Cover Interview & Fourth of July Fashion | | 04:14 | "Gray Matters" Fashion Spread / Caption Confusion | | 08:17 | Avon Skin So Soft beauty tip | | 10:29 | "Burn, Baby" – Stars/Stripes Fashion Skewered | | 15:18 | DIY Disaster: Dress Yourself | | 17:01 | Summer-to-Fall “What Next” Preview (Plaid!) | | 19:26 | Beauty Tips & Yogurt Mask Disaster | | 24:36 | Pale Girls and the Carrot Juice Myth | | 24:40 | Sassaby (Caboodles Competitor) Ad Breakdown | | 26:14 | Andre Agassi Fan Club Mania | | 27:18 | Sassy Board Game Ad | | 28:07 | Icarus Teen Magazine Joke | | 31:17 | Most Embarrassing Period Stories Contest | | 35:42 | Modeling Scams & The Patty Farrel True Crime Story | | 41:02 | Tarot Hotlines, Letters, and Alternative School | | 45:56 | Next Episode Tease & Community Call-Out |

Overall Tone & Style

Authentic, irreverent, arch, and affectionate toward its subject matter. The conversation is filled with jokes, nostalgia, and editorial asides that will resonate most with Gen-Xers (and Sassy magazine fans), but remains entertaining throughout.