March 1991 Pop Culture: Hair, Gossip & The Replacements

Summary

Listen To Sassy: Life In The 90s Episode: March 1991 Pop Culture: Hair, Gossip & The Replacements
Release Date: May 20, 2025
Hosts: Tara Ariano, Pamela Ribon, and David T. Cole

---

Introduction

In this lively episode of Listen To Sassy: Life In The 90s, hosts Tara Ariano, Pamela Ribon, and David T. Cole delve into the pop culture landscape of March 1991. The episode traverses a mix of quirky anecdotes, controversial studies, music retrospectives, and movie critiques, all while maintaining the playful and irreverent tone that Sassy magazine was known for among Gen-X teens.

Controversial Research: Cats and Gunshot Wounds

The episode kicks off with a surprising discussion about a 1991 study conducted by Louisiana State University researchers, which controversially involved shooting cats' heads to study battlefield head injuries.

David T. Cole:
"They fired pellets into the heads of about 6,700 anesthetized felines to study the improvement treatment of Battlehead battlefield head injuries." [02:55]

Tara Ariano:
"Why would you put a $2 million grant straight into the head of a kitten? What is that?" [02:45]

The hosts express bewilderment and moral questioning over the ethics of such research, highlighting the absurdity and shock value that would resonate with Sassy magazine's readership.

Pop Culture Spotlight: Music and Bands

Shifting gears, the hosts reminisce about the music scene, particularly focusing on the iconic band The Replacements. They express a longing for the band's recognition and discuss their influence compared to more mainstream acts.

Pamela Ribon:
"When I see the Nudniks, okay, Mad magazine, who achieve pop music stardom these days, it's enough to make me ralph. When is a cool, really talented, really deserving band gonna make it big like the Replacements?" [29:18]

The conversation underscores the tension between underground coolness and commercial success, a recurring theme in 90s pop culture discussions.

Movie Reviews: From "Once Around" to "Warlock"

The hosts provide critiques of contemporary films, starting with Once Around, a film featuring Danny Aiello and Holly Hunter. They comment on the film's dynamics and casting choices, subtly weaving in their perspectives on character relationships and societal norms.

Tara Ariano:
"Once Around sounds like it's pretty good or as they say, good eating." [18:54]

Transitioning to Warlock, starring Julian Sands, the hosts share personal anecdotes and lament the underappreciation of certain actors, blending humor with thoughtful critique.

David T. Cole:
"I think the replacements are too easily replaced in your mind with literally any other thought." [32:20]

Personal Anecdotes and Behind-the-Scenes

Throughout the episode, the hosts intersperse personal stories and interactions, adding a layer of authenticity and camaraderie. David shares a mishap at the gym that led to a finger injury, providing a humorous and relatable moment.

David T. Cole:
"I got hurt and it cost me a bunch of money." [35:20]

These moments serve to humanize the hosts, allowing listeners to connect with them beyond their pop culture critiques.

Celebrity Gossip: Perry Farrell and Jane's Addiction

A segment is dedicated to a guest blurb from Andrea, recounting a humorous encounter with Perry Farrell of Jane's Addiction fame. The story highlights the band's edgy image and the peculiarities of celebrity interactions during the early 90s.

Andrea:
"And oftentimes when you're reading something, you're like, I bet I will. I was. I got to the end was like, you know what? That's a pretty good story." [10:47]

Ratings and Reviews: "Anything's Possible" by Debbie Gibson

The hosts introduce a unique rating system using "dots" to evaluate movies and music. They discuss Debbie Gibson's album The Look, offering a blend of praise and critique while showcasing their distinct rating methodology.

Pamela Ribon:
"And when I say they, I mean Neil gives five dots to Debbie Gibson's Anything Is Possible." [21:50]

This segment reflects the playful and unconventional approach Sassy fans would appreciate, aligning with the magazine's signature style.

Closing Remarks and Episode Wrap-Up

As the episode nears its end, the hosts navigate technical difficulties and time constraints, prioritizing their commitments while maintaining their characteristic humor.

Tara Ariano:
"We gotta end this episode early because Pam's got to go see a movie." [38:06]

The episode concludes with a teaser for the next installment, promising further exploration of March 1991's fashion and cultural highlights.

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Notable Quotes

• Pamela Ribon:
  "I don't resent you, Leland. If anything, maybe I resent myself for staying with a man who doesn't love you." [00:01]

• David T. Cole:
  "They had to bring it back up again to decide whether or not they could continue shooting kittens in the head to study how gunshot wounds affects kitten skulls." [05:04]

• Tara Ariano:
  "Nothing good's come out of Bellstrop, Texas, I could tell you that." [09:43]

• David T. Cole:
  "Warlock got three pips. I only bring up Warlock because it stars this guy named Julian Sands." [19:23]

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Conclusion

This episode of Listen To Sassy: Life In The 90s masterfully blends humor, nostalgia, and critical analysis to paint a vivid picture of March 1991's pop culture scene. From controversial scientific studies to heartfelt discussions about beloved bands and movies, Tara, Pam, and Dave ensure that both long-time Sassy fans and new listeners are engaged and entertained. The inclusion of personal anecdotes and a unique rating system adds depth and relatability, embodying the spirit of the original magazine's impact on Gen-X teens.

Transcript

[Pam]

Rosalind, I'm sorry. I can't marry you.

[Dave]

This isn't about that.

[Pam]

This is about that. For the past week, I've been getting nothing but resentment.

[Tara]

You know that's true.

[Pam]

I don't resent you, Leland. If anything, maybe I resent myself for.

[Dave]

Staying with a man who doesn't love you. I really didn't want to talk about it. Rosalind. Oh, my God.

[Tara]

It is March 1991. Rosalind falls down an elevator shaft on LA Law. Hannibal Lecter is having an old friend over for a celebration of Silence of the Lambs. Being at the top of the box office, Dances With Wolves wins best pitcher, and Polaroid inventor Edwin Land dies in a plane crash due to a set of failures that has to have developed quickly. But you don't care too much about all that because you're plotting your way out of this shithole town. It's such a big job that you don't have time to deal with diaries right now. And even if you did, blank diaries that you can buy in this weird town are made of vellum and your dog Magnum keeps on eating them. Honestly, what's the point? Maybe you should just do a diary entry. Every other episode of your life, starting with the next one, but definitely skipping the one after. Anyway, something to think about.

[Pam]

Yes, it's time to listen to Sassy. You know, I.

[Tara]

Wait a sec. Before we get into. Well, you knows, everybody's got to know. Pam's got a heart out. We got to end this episode early because Pam's got to go see a movie. So chop chop with the commentary.

[Dave]

Pam's got a heart out.

[Pam]

Pam's got a heart out. I also, just. Regarding the diary, I have suggested on many occasions, I'm going to say, going back months, that maybe someone should just lose that diary.

[Tara]

And maybe the dog will eat them. Keep on eating them.

[Pam]

Maybe the dog will eat them. Or whatever kind of weird pets they have in this town. Maybe the wombat will eat the diary.

[Tara]

Wombat. Platypus. Platypi.

[Pam]

Yes.

[Tara]

Yeah.

[Pam]

Anyway, all right. Pam has a hard ass, so let's get into it. Oh, what now?

[Tara]

What now?

[Pam]

What now?

[Dave]

Because I assume we have nothing going on in our pop culture lives because we were nerds. Okay, Kitties are being shot with a $2 million grant from the army researchers at the Louisiana State University.

[Tara]

Wait, are they shooting the cats with the grants? Is that what you just said?

[Dave]

Yes.

[Tara]

Each cat's getting $2,000 shot at them.

[Dave]

This is why it was considered unnecessary spending. Why would you put a $2 million grant straight into the head of a kitten. What is that?

[Tara]

Simply doesn't make any sense.

[Dave]

It doesn't make any sense. They were studying gunshot wounds. They claimed since 1983, they fired pellets into the heads of about 6, 700 anesthetized felines to study the improvement treatment of Battlehead battlefield head injuries. Battlehead.

[Tara]

I don't want to tell the government their business, but throughout school I was learning that, you know, orangutans shared, like, 99% of our DNA. So instead of cats, why we just round out a whole bunch of orangutans and shoot them? Save the cats. Shoot the orangutans. Save the cats. Shoot the orangutans. They know what they did.

[Pam]

I mean, I think the true answer is people like orangutans more than they like guys.

[Tara]

We got to get out this kitten thing. Pam's got to go see a movie in about 50 minutes.

[Dave]

My God, they. What a fun thing you're enjoying. Happy Dave had a birthday, everybody. Can you tell the glee that he has for being just a little bit older, a little bit wiser?

[Tara]

Pam got me so many gift certificates of coffee. Yeah, thank you, Pam. I've had two so far. I had to. I've had. Not today. Had one today, but they're decaf. Anyways, I can't drink caffeinated coffee anymore.

[Dave]

I wasn't going to put something that would sit on your table for your Christmas pile for next year.

[Tara]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Pam]

That's nice. Anyway, what else did you get for your birthday, Dave?

[Tara]

Cats. And you know where they're going.

[Pam]

Now. This is a P.S. from our last episode. Because I got you a loaf of your brown fucking seedy bread for your birthday.

[Tara]

Tara got me a spiteful present of a loaf of Dave's. Dave's bread.

[Dave]

Jesus Christ, that sounds like punishment. In Iceland. They're like, if you're not nice, Santa Claus brings you a loaf of the seedy brown bread from Dave.

[Tara]

Yeah. I mean, it was a good gift.

[Pam]

Yeah. Thoughtful.

[Dave]

I know it. It is. No, for him. I just mean in general. It does sound like the. The present you get when you're not a good kid.

[Tara]

It does.

[Dave]

A loaf of bread.

[Tara]

It's a traditional gift here in our homeland.

[Dave]

Right.

[Tara]

It's bread with 44 grains. Enjoy. Remember to put on your teeth guards.

[Pam]

Anyway, back to the cats. I'm sorry.

[Tara]

Yes, Maz. That's what they say before you have the bread. Yes, Maz.

[Dave]

This study was suspended, so.

[Tara]

Off the rails already. Are we still in the Cats.

[Pam]

Yeah, we're still in the cats.

[Dave]

I don't even know why. I just want to say as soon as I looked up shooting kittens in the head, the study was suspended two years before this issue came out. So we can't even say, like, it's a little behind. But, um, they said we're not stopping because of animal rights groups or their pressures. Oh, okay. And then the report, like, they had to bring it back up again to decide whether or not they could continue shooting kittens in the head to study how gunshot wounds affects kitten skulls. The report made no recommendation whether the research should be allowed to continue. Instead, the investigative branch of Congress said it should be up to Defense Secretary Dick Cheney to decide if there are still enough merits to keep shooting. You know, just whatever heads near you, shoot it. Yeah, the chainy way.

[Pam]

Exactly. Yes. He said, don't stop shooting cats. Start shooting old men who go on hunting trips with me instead. You.

[Tara]

You just. You laugh, you make fun of it. But the sliding doors reality in which this study wasn't taking is that several states are overrun by cats and we can't figure out how to kill them because the bullets that we've been using without this research bounce off their heads.

[Dave]

But Chaney's friend survived a gunshot wound to the head. Right.

[Pam]

So, yes, he did.

[Dave]

Did the kittens.

[Tara]

That guy was half cat.

[Pam]

Yes. Eight lives. Let's do that. Meow. Or sorry.

[Tara]

Four. Three and a half Fan Zine of the month is dawn is Ugly. It's one of these punk. What do you got? Magazines or having zings are putting the spelling corrections right on the page. We're not going to blah, blah, blah. I. That's fine. That's all good zines. Were we miss scenes. I just want to say congratulations on 2025 Joe Rogan for getting on the COVID of Don is ugly back in 1991.

[Pam]

And it. Take this right down to the comedy mothership and play this podcast for him. He's gonna cry.

[Tara]

What D.B. sweeney's been doing with himself is something else that you can enjoy and what now? And there's a picture of him being all like, I'm D.B. sweeney and I'm. There's a whole bunch of information. Apparently he's good friends with Harry Connick Jr. America's favorite crooner. And that's all fine, but I just wanted to mention right at the end of the articles, we got a numbs mention again. So he is Sweenums.

[Pam]

Yes.

[Tara]

According to this little article let.

[Pam]

Yes.

[Tara]

Sweet nums.

[Dave]

Was D.B. sweeney on SNL? No, like, I think I can't.

[Pam]

That's Julius Sweeney or Terry Sweeney.

[Tara]

No.

[Dave]

Oh, that. I always confuse these two.

[Tara]

Or a Whitney Brown. Kind of got the same cadence.

[Dave]

A Whitney Brown or a couple of them. Was he a one to watch?

[Pam]

Maybe. Who? Where?

[Dave]

Like, this name means nothing to me. I don't.

[Tara]

How many casts do you think D.B. sweeney's killed?

[Pam]

He's. He's run over so many with his hockey skates. Because he is, of course, one of the stars of the Cutting Edge, which may be where you know him from. The figure skating.

[Dave]

Maybe that's it.

[Tara]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Okay. Thanks. A little boy stands up for his rights.

[Tara]

Farley Seagull, or whatever his name was.

[Pam]

Fear Go, Sharkey.

[Tara]

Feagal Sharky.

[Dave]

Oh, you missed me for remembering. Eight year old Zach Tungate goes to third grade in Bastrop, Texas, a place where Pam has been often lately and has been growing his ponytail for three years. Last fall, when his school board revised its dress code to forbid boys from growing their hair below the collar, Zack begged his parents to let him keep it. They said he could do what he wanted. They put him in an isolation tank in a storage area. He had to go to school in a little room, couldn't go to lunch with his friends, couldn't go to class, couldn't do anything because he had a ponytail. And the homeschooling movement was born. They pulled him out of school, taught him at home.

[Tara]

Yeah.

[Dave]

And Zach these days, I don't know about him, is doing just fine. But this went all the way to, like, the. The courts, the big courts, about whether or not he could keep his hair for years. And they were like, you know, we did say it's up to him. You know, we're not going to make him cut his hair. It's just his hair. This poor kid.

[Pam]

I know.

[Tara]

The Tongue Gates are a recent addition to our melting pot, that is America. Because if they were here when Ellis island was still in service, the Tongue Gates would have come through the door and they would have named them teeth.

[Pam]

I can't answer whether I approve of this story or not until I see this kid's hair.

[Tara]

Nothing good's come out of Bellstrop, Texas, I could tell you that.

[Pam]

It's Bastrop.

[Tara]

Bass struck Texas. Yeah. I think that's where Musk is now.

[Pam]

I think maybe the only time I ever see it in the news is, like, when there's, you know, some kind of weather event coming through the county or whatever. But if this guy's got long, luxurious Like Fabio hair. Great. If this is just a rat tail that keeps going, I'm on the side of the school.

[Dave]

It was a rat tail. It was a rat tail. I did, I did. I did read that far that it was a little piece that was long. I want to point out that according to LinkedIn, I don't think Zach has much hair on the top of his head these days. So I'm glad he kept it as long as he could when he had it. Live. Live free or die.

[Pam]

That's a great point.

[Tara]

One more thing the Democrats have stolen from him. Wa pa. How many. How many cats do you think that guys killed? Three, probably three maybe. Allegedly.

[Pam]

Perry Farrell makes a stink. Muchas grass. This is a guest blurb by Andrea. Muchas gracias.

[Tara]

Can you please do it? A very racist accent. Is that possible?

[Dave]

No.

[Tara]

Okay. Never know.

[Dave]

Kim doesn't have that kind of time.

[Tara]

Okay. Right.

[Pam]

Muchas gracias, Stein. There. I'll. I'll do it in Peggy Hill accent for you for giving me your tickets to the Jane's Addiction private party. You'll never believe what happened. And oftentimes when you're reading something, you're like, I bet I will. I was. I got to the end was like, you know what? That's a pretty good story. Me and my friend Hollis were waiting outside the bathroom when some male groupie. The worst kind. Agree. In a spanking new bolero hat. Don't know what that is. Asked us if we had to go really, really bad because Perry has to go really, really bad. I didn't think Perry was so stuck up. I mean, couldn't he ask for himself? Are you really going to cut ahead of us? I asked. Perry was embarrassed and even said no, but he ran into the bathroom anyway. He was in there a really long time too. Incidentally. The next night when we ran went to see Jane's Addiction play. I forgave him because he sang my favorite song, Ocean size in his underpants. Very truly yours, Andrea. This is the exact kind of low stakes celebrity gossip story that celebrity gossip is made of. I was at an event and Perry Farrell had terrible food poisoning right in front of me.

[Tara]

Paint job.

[Pam]

Absolute paint job.

[Dave]

Gross. Yeah, right. Heroin.

[Tara]

I gotta keep us on track, guys. We got. Pam's gotta go see her movie.

[Dave]

Herin. Heroin is terrible. Yeah, Pam's gotta go see Sinners. Everybody keeps talking about it.

[Tara]

You want to spoil it a bit for you so you don't have to go.

[Dave]

I think they're vampires. I.

[Pam]

It's fine as Long as it's sinners and not something bad, then it's fine.

[Dave]

Sinners in the comfy chairs.

[Pam]

If you said you were going to Thunderbolt fancy Glossary definition number 36 is smoking.

[Tara]

This is so unhinged. Yeah.

[Pam]

Which they say is an adjective. Crazy or severely misguided usage. If you think Warrant is a good band, you must be smoking. I have certainly never heard this. And this is not what smoking means. We all know what smoking means. Yeah, we may be three years away from the mask, but we know what smoking means. It means hot. It doesn't mean high.

[Tara]

Smoking means smoking means this.

[Dave]

You must be smoking something.

[Tara]

Yeah, you're smoking something. You have to say more words to make it work, right? All right, I'm glad we're all agreed here we are. We gotta get paid for this movie I gave.

[Dave]

Also, I just want to say there's no. It's fine. No. Back to bolero hat. You haven't seen a bolero hat. The Met gala just happened and. Or Beyonce's made an entrance.

[Pam]

Oh, okay, sure. I'll put it in the show.

[Dave]

The hat that says. That's the hat that says, no, I'm very important and I'm about to enter.

[Pam]

Yeah, Beyonce.

[Tara]

Or I would say the longer we go, what's going to happen is I'm going to start spoiling things from the start of Sinners, because you're definitely going to miss some stuff at the start.

[Dave]

I don't care. I'm not going for me. I'm going for others. The 10 best band names ever on a list include Mud Honey, Chainsaw Kittens, Jane's Addiction, Goo Goo Dolls, Chia Pet, and Y' all. Wipe me, Mommy.

[Pam]

No.

[Dave]

Wipe me, Mommy, no.

[Tara]

Yeah, it's a quartet. It's a barbershop quartet. Wipe me, Wipe me. Wipe me, Mommy. My bum Bum Dirty.

[Pam]

Oh, I thought they sing all their songs from the perspective of the kitchen countertop. White Me, Mommy.

[Tara]

Oh, wow, that's a really generous take.

[Dave]

On white people don't really not what I heard.

[Pam]

That's true.

[Dave]

When I went looking on the Internet, Reddit also had a thread about, like, best band names ever, and someone put Wipe Me a Mommy on that one, too. And I just want to say two people shouldn't share this opinion.

[Pam]

Gross.

[Dave]

Awful. Gross. Barbie Shmarby Part 2. Barbie were a 5 foot 6 woman, her measurements would be anatomically impossible. Whatever. Anyway, Barbie's got an album coming out called the look, and it's all covers sung by Barbie. Girls just want to have fun and let's hear it for the boy, et cetera. You can listen to the look on YouTube featuring Barbie being played by an uncredited Rachel Sweet, who I just love her voice. That is also Amy Loane's voice double.

[Tara]

For Crybaby closing track, what Happened to All My Cats.

[Pam]

Popcorn.

[Tara]

Popcorn.

[Pam]

A movie out this February is trying hard to be the next Rocky Horror Picture Show. This should be the cult film for 1991, swears the movie's publicist. And I would like to tell this, I assume, woman what I would like to tell every producer that has ever come to a team and said, we're looking for the next viral hit. Can't set out to make a viral hit. And you can't set out to make a cult movie either. Holy. That said, you can watch it on YouTube. It also apparently had a high enough profile to be on shutter. I don't have Shutter access, but I saw it is there too. So they did something, but I am not in a position to say whether it was worth what they did. Wa Pal. Now we're at the point in the sassiest boy in America life cycle where we're getting blurbs to say there's nothing to report about the sassiest boy in America. I've been unable to connect with the sassiest boy in America for some time, she says.

[Tara]

But the president is missing.

[Pam]

His band played with the English pop band Lush at CBGB's in NYC. We'll hear more about Lush later. I was unable to attend since they went on stage way past my bedtime. 12:30am and it was a school night. Actually, I would have gone, but I couldn't get any of the wimps I wor work with to join me. Maybe because they didn't want to see you hit on him anymore, Christina.

[Dave]

Well, I just think other people found him insufferable already. Like there. Not another second. Not another second.

[Pam]

Exactly. That's it for what now? Wow.

[Dave]

I'd rather sit next to Dave's popcorn song again.

[Pam]

Watch it. It is the March issue. That means we get new designations for all of the ratings dots. Five dots made the little hairs on the back of our necks stand up. Four dots. That's good eating. That's my favorite one. That should be five dots, frankly. Number three. Sorry. Three dots poised between good and not good. Two dots kind of made us want to spit. One dot. Stay and water your Chia Pet.

[Tara]

We're talking very briefly because I know Pam has to go see a movie soon. Very briefly. We're talking on another Podcast about how I hate Let him cook. And whatever is back on the menu. Boys, really, I hate it. I hate him. But I kind of love this. This thing. We should bring that back.

[Dave]

That's good eating.

[Tara]

That's good eating. Yeah. I don't know why I like that one.

[Pam]

You should let him cook because that's good eatin. They go hand in hand. No, they go fork and fork. Forced dots for once around. No. No hits this month. This movie is about a nutty, close knit Italian clan. Christina reviews it and says the Danny Aiello character is the head of this clan. One of his daughters, Holly Hunter, marries this obnoxious salesman who is old enough to be her father, Richard Dreyfus, which causes all kinds of problems with the family. Richard Dreyfus is a piece of shit. We know now he's got very bad opinions about trans people just for what one. But he's, you know, let's be fair, not old enough to be Holly Hunter's father. He is 10 years older than her. And I know I've seen this movie, but I always mix it up with the movie. Always. For some reason, which I don't think they have anything in common other than like they maybe came around, came out around the same time.

[Tara]

Yeah. Is it always like a romance set in like firefighters or something?

[Pam]

I know it's a Steven Spielberg movie and I think it has to do with a ghost or someone's bereaved.

[Tara]

Yeah. But I think like the characters are like water plane, firefighters or something like that.

[Pam]

Maybe.

[Tara]

Okay.

[Pam]

Anyway, once around sounds like it's pretty good or as they say, good eating.

[Tara]

Speaking about movies, we got a half an hour to get Pam out of here so she can go see hers.

[Pam]

Sure do.

[Tara]

Moving on. Next one is Warlock. It got. It's got three pips. I only bring up Warlock because it stars this guy named Julian Sands. And Julian Sands for me was always on the poster for Warlock in the video store. And for the longest time I thought there was like two types of English people. There was like the snooty guy with the bowler hat that used to be in the army. And then there was Julian Sands, the Warlock. Those are the two type of British people. So congratulations to him.

[Dave]

I can't hear Julian Sands without hearing, but Helena, I love you.

[Tara]

Is that from boxing? Helena?

[Dave]

Yes, it's lived in my head forever.

[Tara]

But Helena, didn't he die hiking or something?

[Pam]

Yes, he did. He. He went missing in January 2023, hiking in the San Gabriel Mountains. And they didn't find his remains until Five months later, we miss him.

[Tara]

One second. I gotta let. I'm gonna let the dog go.

[Dave]

I put in the show notes here. I haven't seen any of these films, but I maybe, maybe saw The Godfather Part 3. I definitely know I've seen the.

[Tara]

So sorry. Wasted 27 seconds off mic.

[Dave]

She filled it while you were you doing popcorn? No.

[Pam]

Okay, she's seen one moment in Godfather Part 3 and what is it, Pam? Since Dave so rudely interrupted you.

[Dave]

Sorry, dad.

[Pam]

That's the moment. I got it.

[Dave]

But I don't know if I've seen that or I've only seen Jeff Long's interpretation of it, which helped him win a staged contest we did once called we're so Much Better Than Everyone Else. And he won the most rightest off of that impression.

[Pam]

That's pretty good. Yes. Godfather Part 3 is in fact a two hip movie. Kind of made us want to spit. Is fair. The reviewer is Mary, who says it's a bit of a letdown. That was probably like in the upper echelon of reviews, this movie got to the point where they, like, considered putting it on the poster. I will say this movie is not so bad. If you watch the first two directly in front of it, then it sort of seems like it all feels like a piece of. Because that's how I experienced it. The first time requires zero.

[Dave]

Wait, you waited even a day to see this film? So you're like, what a letdown.

[Pam]

Yeah, it's, you know, it's not great, but I bet it's more watchable than Megalopolis having not seen that just saying.

[Tara]

About the giant shark.

[Pam]

Yeah, exactly. Everything is possible.

[Tara]

Everything is possible.

[Pam]

Oh, I forgot to write down what that song's called.

[Dave]

Just kidding.

[Pam]

It's called Anything's Possible.

[Tara]

This is comedy.

[Pam]

Thank you again. New ratings. Five pips means yes siree, Bob. Four is four dots. So I guess they're calling dots, Dave. Three. Okay, yeah, maybe. Perhaps. Well, two is caveat emptor and one is not. That's my favorite of this, this round, personally. But they. And when I say they, I mean Neil gives five dots to Debbie Gibson's Anything Is Possible.

[Dave]

That is a real Anything is Possible.

[Tara]

Seriously.

[Pam]

I mean, I'm gonna say he's had a word count minimum imposed since the last time we got from Neil, because this is, you know, a substantial link.

[Tara]

It's very, very, very good.

[Pam]

Exactly. The first it opens with I saw her out somewhere. Or no, which the other day I lunched at New York's Hard Rock Cafe. Lol. Tourist After I had just gotten Debbie Gibson's new record. So I was remembering the last event I was at there. And guess what? It was Debbie Gibson's Electric Youth Party.

[Dave]

Great.

[Pam]

What does anything have to that have to do with how this record sounds? He also fills up space by saying not only is she looking incredibly great, but also sounding very nice. Okay. Oh, not relevant at all.

[Tara]

Nice.

[Dave]

But someone fucked up with Debbie Gibson's publicist.

[Tara]

He's nice.

[Pam]

She's nice, too. Yeah. So, Neil. Still gross. In case you were wondering.

[Tara]

It's like the babies first. George Michael. Yeah.

[Dave]

Honestly. Honestly. That's all. You're done, right?

[Tara]

Oh, am I okay.

[Dave]

You need no more of that song?

[Tara]

No. Okay. All right. Done. Thank you.

[Dave]

I think this song was in the Elle McPherson workout tape that I did in high school because that song just made me think I had to start swinging my hip into a leg opening warmup. I could be wrong.

[Tara]

All right. I know that we're short on time, but I want you, when it starts kicking in, to do the fear Goal Sharky voice singing Freedom. Okay, ready? Here we go.

[Pam]

I won't let you down I don't pick you up.

[Tara]

Whoa. Tara's gone.

[Dave]

I made her disappear. Pitchfork recently did a deep dive review last year and gave it 9.5. I was not a Happy Mondays person. Like, this kind of house music was not my thing. I actually only put this in here because they had a song called Donovan and that made me want to know. Listen to Sassy Book Club. Did you read Ione Skies? Say everything. We should talk about it.

[Pam]

Oh, God. I heard her on a podcast and she sounded real dumb.

[Dave]

Listen, I think there's a. Nope.

[Tara]

Yeah, listen to this. You're going to go see this movie no matter what. That's what. Freedom. Freedom.

[Dave]

Lush's gala. Gala. Who knows? Reminded me of the 120 minute staple sweetness and Light that played like, constantly from this album. I think Lush played the Lollapalooza I went to. This was a band that I probably should have been into, Much like Bat for Lashes. Like, how did I not. How was I not into these bands? Now I would totally get into it.

[Tara]

Bat for Lashes is one of those annoying things where it's just a name for a person that's not actually a band. I don't think that should be allowed in music. Either put your name on it or you actually have to form a band. There's. There's no other way to do it.

[Pam]

You heard that Bony Bear?

[Tara]

You heard that Bat for Lashes. You're in Trouble now.

[Dave]

Is that what you mean? Isn't Bat for Lashes?

[Tara]

No, Bat for Lashes is just a lady. It's like, forget her name. Natasha Khan, I think something like that.

[Dave]

Natasha Khan.

[Pam]

She thought the same thing. Because you gotta go.

[Dave]

She is Natasha.

[Tara]

We gotta go. Pam.

[Dave]

Fine. Why? Is someone busy?

[Tara]

All right. Music. That was music.

[Dave]

That was music.

[Tara]

Next segment.

[Pam]

Time.

[Dave]

So glad Dave got older. You know what? You've really loosened up. You've really loosened up. I like it. I'm into it. This one to watch is crazy. I looked at this and was like, who knows who this person is?

[Tara]

You don't know who this is?

[Dave]

I have genuinely no idea who this person is. IMDb is like, I do.

[Tara]

Yeah.

[Dave]

He's constantly in things. He's in everything my mom watches. He's in everything my mother's ever seen on television. His name is Reed Diamond. His name sounds like someone from books. Like, he just doesn't seem like an actor who still works. His name is Reed Diamond. He was also in Memphis Belle, where D.B. sweeney went before Saturday Night Live. Also, you showed me this Reed Diamond. I would think it was a Saturday Night Live character that I didn't know. An actor that did one season.

[Tara]

Reed Diamond.

[Dave]

Yeah. And he just does one weekend update. It doesn't go well. He accidentally says cunt, and then he's gone. He went to Juilliard and. And he's still in things. He's. What a long career. He's got an I and he's got an Instagram. He's just a busy, busy gentleman. I guess he was one to watch.

[Tara]

Yeah. I think Reed Diamond's been replaced by what's his nuts from Rome. These days. I feel like they.

[Pam]

Kevin McKidd.

[Tara]

Kevin McKidd, for sure.

[Pam]

They definitely look alike.

[Tara]

Yeah.

[Dave]

I think he's been mckitted to be knows Reed Diamond. These are all recappable, recapped shows.

[Tara]

Oh, sure.

[Pam]

For sure.

[Dave]

He has been discussed.

[Pam]

Where do you know him from, Dave?

[Tara]

Homicide.

[Pam]

Yeah, he was in Homicide, Life in the Street. But he also. I went to see the movie Drop, like, last month, and then there was his name in the. In the credits. Third Build. And I was so proud of him that to be in this big, you know, blumhousey type of horror scary movie.

[Tara]

You want to hear my trailer for Drop?

[Pam]

Yeah.

[Tara]

Drop.

[Pam]

I thought you were going to do the Rosalind Chase thing again.

[Tara]

That's good. Yeah. Thematic.

[Pam]

Yeah. Anyway, good for Reed. He's still around.

[Tara]

Are we not gonna talk about this? Pose in the photo? He's permanently damaging his back bending so much.

[Pam]

I bet at Juilliard they make you take movement classes. And he was doing well in his. And he wanted to show off how flexible he is. And I'm actually impressed.

[Tara]

Yeah, he's like, phoebe, I'm bendy.

[Dave]

Yeah, he's very bendy.

[Tara]

All right, well, enough of this. We gotta get Pam to this point. Movie.

[Pam]

Yep. Just one feature, thank God, cuz Pam's got to go to the movies. Well, it is. It is called. Oh my God. Where is it? Will the Replacements Ever Be Famous?

[Tara]

Is that. Is that or is it Will the Replacements Ever be Famous?

[Pam]

I think it's more like Will the Replacements Ever be be Famous? Because Mike always has such a chip on his shoulder every time they let him write a feature.

[Tara]

Will the replacement ever be Famous?

[Pam]

Nelson, Hammer, Slaughter, Wilson Phillips, New kids, vanilla ice, etc. Etc. Blah, blah, blah. When I see the Nudniks, okay, Mad magazine, who achieve pop music stardom these days, it's enough to make me ralph. I mean, when is a cool, really talented, really deserving band gonna make it big like the Replacements? So Mike is interviewing Paul Westerberg, a founding member.

[Dave]

Na na na na na na na.

[Tara]

Exactly.

[Dave]

That's all I can hear after you say his name.

[Pam]

He's gonna be. Mike is going to be the most mad next year when singles comes out and Paul Westerberg is all over the soundtrack with I've Got a Defective Heart, Mike's gonna be like, I miss. When he was singing about whatever angry bullshit he was singing about on this. The albums before this one he's currently promoting that Mike already thinks is kind of sellouty, but is trying not to say that in so many words, but it's still coming across.

[Dave]

It's very sweet that you said Defective Heart, which I guess is the updated version of Dyslexic Heart, which was the cart.

[Tara]

Thank you, you dolt.

[Dave]

Nah, nah, nah, nah.

[Tara]

Aw. Well, you got editor noted.

[Pam]

I'm not a fan. I've always mixed up the Replacements with Pavement and I probably always will.

[Tara]

How are we doing on time? Pam's gotta get to this movie.

[Pam]

So. Yeah, I have nothing really to say about Paul Westerberg. People respect him. He makes a joke about like not being cute enough to be a pop star, but the picture's cute.

[Tara]

He looks Bon Jovi ish to me.

[Dave]

I'm tell you why. I'm going to tell you why. I started with I have a heart out at 4:30. It has not to do with me or the film. It has to do with. I told Jason. So I, you know, I'm recording the podcast and he was time for this story. Honestly, he was like that. He was like that. He just stood in my doorway, eyes went wide, eyebrows went up. He said, are you gonna be ready to go at 4:30?

[Tara]

And I said, was he asking or telling?

[Dave]

Yes. That's right, Dave. That's right, Dave. And so I was like, yes. And he said, because, you know, you.

[Tara]

Wanna get Jason in here to explain himself. Do we have time?

[Dave]

No, we have time. He's busy dropping. He's busy.

[Tara]

Should we go back to the cat conversation?

[Dave]

This is where kids go. The kids are being taken care of. So that there's. It doesn't matter. You don't have to know. But there's like a whole situation going on. In order for the car to leave at 4:30 on time with everybody on, we're going two miles away. Yeah, but you know.

[Tara]

Yeah. Jason lives his life in a giant Gantt chart is what I'm learning here.

[Dave]

He won't call an Uber until I am in, like, at the door holding a purse. And then he will go. Last picture after calling the Uber, which I think is a control move. But if I am upstairs, no Uber call. This is what I mean.

[Tara]

This is basically the plot of Sinners. So I don't want to like.

[Pam]

Western vampires. Don't invite that Uber driver in.

[Tara]

This is exactly why the replacements aren't famous as well.

[Dave]

Yeah. It does make you want to talk about other things. This thinking about the replacements. They didn't. They're not the Friends theme song people.

[Pam]

No.

[Dave]

Like, what's that one?

[Pam]

It's the Rembrandt.

[Dave]

See, I think the replacements are too easily replaced in your mind with literally any other thought.

[Tara]

The replacements come out mostly at night. Mostly.

[Dave]

Dave, we can play a game. We have a couple minutes. Because we barreled through in complete lunacy. Do you want to guess what happened to my finger?

[Tara]

Oh, yeah. Pam's got a bright yellow green day glow bandage on it.

[Pam]

I was wondering.

[Tara]

It looks like a knuckle bandage.

[Pam]

It's very large. I wondered if you had stitches under there.

[Tara]

Actually, first of all, I'm gonna just put it out there. Was there a home invasion because of Jason's work? They were trying to get something from him. And you were just cross thumb drive.

[Pam]

Some kind of device?

[Tara]

Thumb drive was actually in your thumb.

[Dave]

That's right. I. I had to give away one digit.

[Tara]

Yeah.

[Dave]

No, Jason was not involved.

[Tara]

Okay. Is it something to do with your new computer? You weren't Used to the weight of the lid. And you slammed it on your finger, cutting it on Apple's precision aluminium frame.

[Dave]

No, but you've. You said keywords.

[Tara]

Oh, okay.

[Pam]

Oh, apple. You cut. You cut it. Cutting an apple.

[Dave]

No, other keywords.

[Tara]

Laptop, Aluminum, Aluminium.

[Dave]

No, this happened on Monday. This happened on Monday.

[Pam]

Okay, you were voting in the conclave, the papal conclave. And then you were. You're calling in remotely.

[Tara]

Home turf advantage or nothing, said Pam.

[Pam]

And you.

[Dave]

Yeah, I was like, american Pope or I'll kill you.

[Tara]

Go with the pizza boy or nothing.

[Dave]

I want Bob Pope. That's it. Bob Pope might have gone to college with my dad because my dad went to Villanova during those times.

[Tara]

Everybody's got a Pope story now that the Pope's from America. One time I was at the Sat LA bar and who was next to me but the Pope?

[Dave]

You think he's so great. He cut in front of me. No, this happened at the gym because I was trying to figure out. I lift heavy things now, and the things that were too heavy last week caused these, like super bruises. So the Internet said, do a goblet squat. Hold your weight like, you know, like it's a little chalice in your hands. And then that's fine, I could squat that. But then you've got to put that back on a rack. That dumbbell in your hand on a wrist is terrible. So it landed on my finger and it didn't. And it pinched it to the thing. And then I thought, no, it doesn't hurt enough. I really hurt it. Like I'm not in enough pain. I'm cold. Put some ice on it. And then it was bleeding everywhere.

[Pam]

Oh, no.

[Dave]

And what I want to say is I got very lucky because I can bend it and I didn't have to. I didn't smash it. But that's my gym injury. Did you get stitches and in doing stitches? No, I didn't get stitches and I didn't have to get anything. But what did happen was I asked the lady I should check on my membership because I feel like I'm still month to month. And she looked it up and she said, you don't have a membership at all and I will now charge you for one. So I got. I got hurt and it cost me a bunch of money.

[Pam]

How long had you been stealing exercise?

[Tara]

Unknowingly?

[Dave]

Wow. That's exactly how my cousin put it. And I want to say, you can't steal without intent.

[Pam]

The time I walked out of H E B with a 20 ounce soda in the pocket. Of my coat and didn't realize until we were almost all the way to my car that I had done that. If someone from the store had caught me, I don't think that they would take the. There was no intent explanation.

[Tara]

Okay, Here is the God's honest truth.

[Dave]

Okay?

[Tara]

I don't want to get on Jason's bad side. So I think we should wrap up the show and get you out of here in plenty of time to see your movie so that Jason doesn't get a little testy and break your other fingers.

[Dave]

Let's go. Let's get out of here.

[Tara]

Next time.

[Pam]

Next time.

[Tara]

Next time we will be talking about. Oh, you do that. Why did I do that? You are. I don't know.

[Pam]

Why did you?

[Tara]

I don't know. We'll be talking about. I just did it again. We're never gonna get out here now.

[Pam]

Do you want to do it or do you want me to do it?

[Tara]

Next time we'll be talking about the fashion etc. Of the March 1991 issue.

[Pam]

Come on, get in here.

[Tara]

There's some others for my plug. This week we talked about the remake of the Four Seasons on Extra Hot Grade.

[Pam]

We sure did. If you're a certain age, this was a movie that your parents probably rented on a Betamax. Now there's a TV version with Tina Fey and a bunch of other middle aged people in it and they're your age now, so watch it or don't. We all said don't. We didn't like it.

[Tara]

My favorite thing about this episode is that it's been so chaotic and unhinged that it's going to be impossible to edit. So it will be very light edit but very annoying to listen to. You can follow Tara on Blue sky. She'[e-mail]. pam's probably there too, but she probably doesn't do anything because she's too crazy for school. Only at the gym, pumping iron and shooting cats. And you can find me on Blue Sky. Now, I don't post much, but I'm Cole, FYI. You can support us on Patreon if you want more of this. For $5 a month, get some great perks. Get the full PDF scan of the issue. That's worth $5 alone, so stop your whining. You can also get access to the Discord where you can see my rendering of Reed diamond as a snake.

[Dave]

So disturbing. It's so disturbing. It's also a pretty good test too, but it is very disturbing.

[Pam]

That is pretty good.

[Tara]

Pam, we got 11 minutes. Get you this movie. Let's wrap it up.

[Dave]

Oh, I can't wait. I hope there's vampires.

[Tara]

We got to end this episode early because Pam's got to go see a movie. So chop chop with the commentary.

[Dave]

Listen, I, I, I want to say I can't turn this down like I've turned it down all the way here. It says that it's on nothing and yet it's so loud in my head. I'm worried it's going to pick up on your whatever. How do I turn where you plugged.

[Tara]

It into.

[Dave]

The Mac machine in the Mac.

[Tara]

Can you plug it into your Yeti?

[Dave]

Oh, no, it is the Yeti. The Yeti is plugged straight into the machine.

[Tara]

No.

[Pam]

Where's your head?

[Tara]

The cord of the headphones plugged into the Mac or plugged into the Yeti?

[Dave]

Into the Yeti.

[Tara]

Can you not turn the volume down? The Yeti, There's a volume knob just for the volume. Listening volume.

[Dave]

But it's got an arrow there that I'm not supposed to touch.

[Tara]

I thought, well, if it's that loud, try it. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[Dave]

Yeah, you're much quieter now. It's not going to affect our recording. Great.

[Tara]

This is the after show where Pam learns about volume knobs.

[Dave]

You know what? I'm protective of my knobs and who touches them?

[Tara]

Yeah, we all are.