Listen To Sassy: Life In The 90s Episode: Special: Tandoori Lady Release Date: December 24, 2024
Hosts: Tara Ariano, Pamela Ribon, David T. Cole
Introduction
In this special episode titled "Tandoori Lady," hosts Tara Ariano, Pamela Ribon, and David T. Cole dive deep into their unforgettable trip to Hawaii, blending humor, mishaps, and memorable encounters. This episode not only captures the essence of their adventures but also intertwines nostalgic reflections reminiscent of the beloved Sassy magazine era.
Departure Blues: The Last Day in Hawaii
As the trio approaches the final day of their Hawaiian getaway, a palpable sense of melancholy sets in. Tara notes, “[00:01] Pam: When you don't get what you want Aloha sounds really sarcastic...” highlighting the underlying frustrations of their trip.
Pam echoes these sentiments, saying, “[01:32] Pam: Yes, that's true. We're not ready to go,” emphasizing how swiftly time flew by. The hosts reminisce about the rapid pace of their week, with Tara adding, “[01:36] Tara: No, we feel it’s too short.”
Stargazing Shenanigans: The Case of Greg the Tour Guide
David recounts his disappointments with the stargazing tour, stating, “[02:11] Dave: This is my fourth trip here to Hawaii. And every time I wanted to go stargazing...”. The anticipation of clear skies was dashed when clouds obscured the view, leading Pam to sarcastically describe the experience as, “[02:59] Pam: I was telling Dave it felt like stargazing for the blind...”
The hosts collectively criticize their tour guide Greg’s performance. Tara remarks, “[03:22] Tara: His name was Greg,” followed by Pam's humorous yet critical observations: “[03:25] Pam: He looked like Tim Calhoun. He had absolutely no upper lip.”
A particularly frustrating moment occurs when Greg, unable to engage the group, resorts to clichéd jokes about constellations, provoking Tara’s exasperation: “[06:32] Pam: Right? So corny.”
Encounter with the Tandoori Lady
One of the episode’s standout moments is their encounter with the enigmatic "Tandoori Lady" at Hapuna Beach. Described vividly by Pam, “[20:08] Dave: Because this woman, while she was there because. Completely shadeless...,” the Tandoori Lady is portrayed as an almost mythical figure—extremely tanned, thin, and perpetually in bikini attire.
Tara adds a humorous twist by co-creating a parody song about her:
Tara: "She's a lady. She's a lady. Talking about that little lady and the lady is mine."
Pam: "She looked like she had tanned so much that all layers of her epidermis had just peeled away."
This playful banter not only lightens the narrative but also cements the Tandoori Lady as a memorable character in their Hawaiian saga.
Zipline Adventures: Becoming the Target Lady
The hosts share their exhilarating yet chaotic experiences on a zipline tour. Pam humorously recounts, “[27:15] Dave: They thought you were insane,” referring to her over-the-top reactions during the zipline ride. Tara complements this by saying, “[30:09] Pam: We were walking from one zip to the other, and Pam got nicknamed the 'panic girl'.”
Their antics on the zipline, including slapstick moments like Pam’s mishaps and Tara’s accidental spills, add a layer of humor and relatability to their adventure narrative.
Spa Day and the Lava Sauna Fiasco
The trio’s attempt at relaxation takes an unexpected turn during their visit to the "lava sauna." Pam describes the awkwardness of sharing mud baths and navigating newfound vulnerabilities:
Pam: “I had to basically go into the path that we had walked into and let lay down with some ants under a bush. It was not glamorous.”
Tara and Dave add to the humor with their recounting of mishaps and playful interactions, such as Tara spilling water on Pam’s mud-covered attire, leading to laughs and light-hearted teasing.
Volcano National Park: Lost in Lava Trees and Autograph Rituals
Their exploration of Volcano National Park introduces them to the fascinating yet challenging landscapes dominated by lava trees and active volcanoes. Tara expresses frustration over lost opportunities: “[87:45] Pam: They didn't release that. And all the things that we looked at, they did not have a 'here's what we closed off today' alert.”
Amidst the natural beauty, they grapple with navigating restricted areas and dealing with unexpected closures, leading to a blend of disappointment and determination to make the most of their visit.
Culinary Capers: Sushi, Pizza, and Coffee Misadventures
Food becomes a recurring theme of both joy and frustration. Pam’s attempts at ordering gourmet sushi with a twist, such as adding macadamia nuts, are met with mixed results:
Pam: “It was really, really good.”
Conversely, her foray into building a custom pizza results in an over-the-top, excessively topped creation, culminating in Tara’s humorous rhymes:
Tara: "She's a lady. She never gonna blanch. Try her with a side of ranch.”
Additionally, their visit to a Kona coffee farm turns sour when expectations of a friendly tour are unmet, leading Pam to sarcastically critique the experience: “[100:35] Pam: He didn’t even offer a tour.”
Final Reflections: Songs, Jokes, and Unforgettable Memories
As the trip winds down, the hosts channel their experiences into creative expressions. Tara and Pam collaboratively craft a parody song honoring the Tandoori Lady, filled with witty lines and playful jabs:
Tara: "She's a lady. She's a lady. Talking about that little lady and the lady is mine."
Pam: "She's super thin and wispy and she tastes like extra crispy. She's a lady."
These moments of creativity underscore the camaraderie and enduring bonds formed through shared adventures and misadventures.
Conclusion
"Special: Tandoori Lady" offers listeners a humorous and heartfelt recounting of a whirlwind Hawaiian trip fraught with challenges, laughter, and unexpected encounters. Through candid conversations and vivid storytelling, Tara, Pam, and Dave paint a vivid picture of friendship tested and strengthened by the chaos and beauty of travel. This episode serves as a nostalgic nod to their Gen-X roots, echoing the spirit of Sassy magazine by celebrating the highs and lows of life with wit and warmth.
Notable Quotes:
- Pam [00:01]: "When you don't get what you want Aloha sounds really sarcastic."
- Tara [01:36]: "No, we feel it’s too short."
- Dave [02:11]: "This is my fourth trip here to Hawaii. And every time I wanted to go stargazing..."
- Pam [03:25]: "He looked like Tim Calhoun. He had absolutely no upper lip."
- Tara [06:32]: "So corny."
- Pam [20:08]: "She looked like she had tanned so much that all layers of her epidermis had just peeled away."
- Pam [30:09]: "We were walking from one zip to the other, and Pam got nicknamed the 'panic girl'."
- Pam [55:54]: "She loved bamboo. That's where I'm not sure what the code is."
- Tara [104:44]: "She's a lady. She's a lady. Talking about that little lady and the lady is mine."
These quotes capture the essence of their experiences, blending frustration, humor, and camaraderie throughout the episode.
