Lovett or Leave It – Episode: Grand Theft Autocrat

Release Date: March 15, 2025

Hosts and Guests:

• John Lovett – Host
• Tig Notaro – Comedian and actress
• Stephanie Allen – Director and writer

1. Welcome and Guest Introduction (24:10)

John Lovett kicks off the episode by introducing his esteemed guests, Tig Notaro and Stephanie Allen. He humorously acknowledges a previous oversight regarding featuring lesbians on the show and warmly welcomes his guests:

“Please put your hands together for the hilarious Tig Notaro and the incredible Stephanie Allen. Hi, welcome. Good to see you both.”
[24:10] – John Lovett

2. Spotlight on "Come See Me in the Good Light" (27:08)

The conversation shifts to Tig and Stephanie’s latest project, the documentary "Come See Me in the Good Light," which chronicles the life of poet Andrea Gibson as they navigate a cancer diagnosis. John praises the film's emotional depth and storytelling prowess.

“And Andrea and I have been friends for 25 years and is one of the greatest poets that you could possibly hear... It got in unanimously at Sundance and it also won the top prize of Sundance this year.”
[27:15] – Tig Notaro

Stephanie elaborates on the documentary’s impact, highlighting Andrea’s resilience and the profound questions the film raises about life and mortality.

“It's very real, like the ups and the downs. But there's just something when Andrea puts their experience to words in the way that they do.”
[30:56] – Stephanie Allen

3. Personal Stories and Relationship Dynamics (24:10 - 44:56)

John seamlessly transitions into personal anecdotes, sharing the story of his engagement with partner Ari Schwartz. He humorously recounts how meticulous planning led to a surprise-less proposal:

“We decided we would do it when the dessert was placed but before we ate it, because then we wouldn't face a... it was a very practical thing. Well, my stuff is already here, so I guess we should spend the rest of our lives together.”
[53:03] – John Lovett

Tig and Ari discuss their own relationship dynamics, emphasizing effective conflict resolution and the quirks that make their bond unique. Tig shares a lighthearted moment about handling disagreements through musical improvisation:

“I just walked over to the window in our kitchen and I just started making up a musical. I was like, there was a time.”
[40:56] – Tig Notaro

Ari adds humorously about their approach to disagreements:

“We work together, but they work on the business side of things, and I work on the stupid side of things.”
[36:30] – John Lovett

4. Playing the Sunywed Game (57:07)

Stephanie Allen introduces the Sunywed Game, a trivia segment designed to test how well couples know each other. The game fosters laughter and reveals endearing insights into each couple's relationship.

Sample Interactions:

• Annoying Habits:

  • Ari: “Doesn't know how to pick up dog poop.”
    Stef: “Her love of air conditioning.”
    [59:34] – Stephanie Allen

• Trolley Problem:

  • The couples discuss their partners’ moral decisions in hypothetical scenarios, leading to playful banter and mutual understanding.

“I totally get it. It's just I didn't. Because of her head, I could not see the five people.”
[61:06] – Tig Notaro

5. Silver Linings Gay Book Game (74:27)

To wrap up the episode on a positive note, John introduces the Silver Linings Gay Book game, where participants find the upside in ostensibly annoying habits.

Examples:

• Littering Dog Poop Bags:

  • Ari: “It shows someone’s out there with a friend and their dog.”
    Tig: “The positive is they're clearly in the process of being cleaned.”
    [75:08] – Ari Schwartz & Tig Notaro

• Loud Chewing:

  • John: “Someone really enjoying their food and having a good time.”
    [76:07] – John Lovett

These exchanges highlight the hosts' ability to infuse humor and positivity into everyday frustrations.

6. Closing Remarks and Future Teasers (79:00)

John expresses heartfelt appreciation for his guests, emphasizing the joy and humor they bring to the show.

“I love both of you. This is such a pleasure.”
[78:53] – John Lovett

He teases upcoming segments and live shows, encouraging listeners to join future episodes and engage with the community.

Notable Quotes:

• John Lovett:

  “Everything's computer. It's perfect, can't be improved on.”
  [03:43]

• Stephanie Allen:

  “And you see it's just part of the fun we have cycling through different YouTube videos about college entrance exam math questions that you're almost done with.”
  [77:08]

• Tig Notaro:

  “What I'm telling you is really good news.”
  [76:52]

Key Takeaways:

• Emotional Resilience: The documentary "Come See Me in the Good Light" showcases the strength and vulnerability of individuals facing life-threatening illnesses, promoting a message of finding joy amidst adversity.

• Relationship Dynamics: Through personal stories and interactive games, the episode highlights effective communication, conflict resolution, and the importance of understanding and appreciating a partner's quirks.

• Humor and Positivity: The hosts adeptly use humor to navigate through serious topics, demonstrating the power of laughter in building and maintaining relationships.

• Community Engagement: The episode encourages listeners to participate in upcoming live shows and engage with the "Lovett or Leave It" community, fostering a sense of belonging and shared experiences.

Conclusion:

"Grand Theft Autocrat" offers a blend of heartfelt discussions, personal anecdotes, and engaging activities that underscore the themes of resilience, love, and the humorous side of everyday life. John Lovett, alongside his guests Tig Notaro and Stephanie Allen, delivers an episode that is both entertaining and meaningful, resonating with listeners who appreciate a mix of comedy and candid conversation.