Why do people who care deeply about compassion sometimes struggle to extend that compassion to one another?

In this thoughtful and timely conversation, I speak with psychologist, author and founder Dr. Melanie Joy about one of the most challenging issues facing advocacy movements today: infighting. Drawing on decades of research into psychology, communication, and social change, Melanie explores why passionate people can become divided and what we can do to foster greater understanding, effectiveness, and unity.

Together, myself and Melanie discuss the role of moral outrage in activism, the limits of shame as a tool for change, and the importance of creating what she calls a more "relational" world. While every justice movement has its own mission, Melanie argues that lasting progress depends on our ability to build healthy relationships, communicate across differences, and work toward shared goals.

This episode offers practical insights for vegans, activists, and anyone seeking to create positive change without sacrificing connection, kindness, or integrity.

✨ In This Episode

What infighting is and why it happens
Why passionate advocates sometimes become divided
The difference between righteous anger and effective advocacy
Why shame rarely creates lasting positive change
What it means to build a more relational world
How justice movements can work together while honoring their unique missions
Simple steps anyone can take to reduce conflict and strengthen community
Creating meaningful change through compassion and communication

👤 About Our Guest

Melanie is a Harvard-educated psychologist and author of 8 books, including Why We Love Dogs, Eat Pigs, and Wear Cows. She is a recipient of the Institute of Jainology's Ahimsa Award, joining honorees that includes Nelson Mandela and the Dalai Lama. She is the founding president of Beyond Carnism, dedicated to exposing and transforming the belief systems that shape our choices and relationships.

🔗 Connect with Melanie

Website: https://infighting.org/ & https://carnism.org/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/beyondcarnism
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beyondcarnism

📚 Also Mentioned

Melanie recently published A Half-Hearted Death Wish, a darkly humorous psychological mystery about a psychologist whose desire to live suddenly vanishes, sending her on a quest to solve the mystery before it's too late.

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