Lasting motivation requires three conditions:

A sense of competence
A sense of relatedness
A sense of autonomy or the felt experience that your actions are genuinely your own

But there is a difference between consultative decision-making and approval-dependent motivation. In the first, you gather input and then decide, with the locus of commitment sitting inside you. In the second, the decision itself waits to be made by someone else’s reaction, and so does your energy.

FIX IT WITH:

Values clarification
Tiny actions that align with those values

THE SOURCE: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/social-instincts/202607/1-habit-that-kills-motivation-for-most-adults

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