Maxwell Leadership Executive Podcast
Episode #337: Communicating Status and Respect
March 27, 2025
Hosts: Perry Holly & Chris Goede
Episode Overview
This episode focuses on how leaders can intentionally communicate status and respect within their teams, particularly as it pertains to motivating younger team members (like Gen Z) but with principles broadly applicable to all. Drawing from Dr. David Yeager’s book, 10 to 25: The Science of Motivating Young People, Perry and Chris discuss actionable practices to bridge the often overlooked “intent versus perception gap,” ensure inclusion, and create empowering environments where team members feel valued.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Understanding Status & Respect in Communication
- Status vs. Respect:
- Status refers to perceived rank, title, or position within an organization.
- Respect is about honoring others as people, regardless of position.
- Many leaders unintentionally communicate in ways that diminish others’ sense of status or respect.
Quote
"There's always a power dynamic in play, whether you're going out of your way to reduce it. ... People are subtly reading between the lines based on what we say and trying to interpret: are there hidden implications in that?"
— Perry Holly [05:57]
2. Intent vs. Perception Gap (06:00–07:00)
- Leaders rarely intend to make others feel “lower,” but perception is reality for team members.
- Leaders bear responsibility for closing the intent-perception gap.
Quote
“As a leader, it’s your responsibility to close the gap, not the other individual.”
— Chris Goede [04:45]
3. Key Practices for Communicating Status and Respect
a. Ask, Don’t Tell: Treat Others as Equals (07:59–09:50)
- Adults want to be asked, not told; commanding tones can diminish status.
- Leaders should consciously treat team members as equals in solving problems, regardless of position.
Quote
“Adults are asked, children are told. ... We love to tell, but we don’t like to be told.”
— Perry Holly [07:59]
- When challenged by an audience member who insisted “we’re not equals,” Chris emphasized the human aspect:
"Positionally, you’re not equal... But we are all people. And we want to make sure we’re valuing all humans as equal."
— Chris Goede [08:30]
b. Actively Honor Status & Expertise (09:50–12:24)
- Explicitly recognize expertise and competence.
- Ask for input to draw people in, not just to affirm authority.
Quote
“Instead of simply appealing to your own authority, ... ask, don't tell. Put some good questions in there and use questioning to draw people into the conversation.”
— Perry Holly [10:46]
- Chris illustrates this with real team dynamics, highlighting Perry’s expertise:
"Perry is our content guy... when it comes to [content], and even John right now will say that Perry is my pen in the corporate voice."
— Chris Goede [11:25]
c. Validate Negative Experiences (14:06–16:04)
- Acknowledge and legitimize emotions tied to failure or setbacks, especially for younger employees who may interpret difficulty as incompetence.
- Use vulnerability and personal stories (“me too”) to build rapport and trust.
Quote
“If you’re working with your team and they say, you know, ‘so what?’ you’ve lost them. But if they leave your presence going, ‘me too,’ you’ve got them.”
— Perry Holly [15:54]
d. Empower with Agency and Decision-Making (16:04–17:00)
- Trust team members with real decisions; empowerment signals ultimate respect and status.
- Equip, model, and release responsibility—the hallmark of inclusive leadership.
e. Foster Open Dialogue and Safe Space (17:00–18:40)
- Practice active listening and be genuinely curious.
- Encourage opinions, even dissenting ones, to give authentic respect.
- Recognize and celebrate contributions, both privately and publicly.
Quote
“When I’ve created an environment where people feel comfortable voicing their opinions—even if it differs from mine—I have learned more as a leader.”
— Chris Goede [17:00]
4. Special Considerations for Gen Z (12:24–13:02)
- Gen Z (“digital natives”) are used to having status and respect in online communities.
- Leaders should mirror that respect in the workplace to avoid demotivation.
Quote
“They come into your world, and you’re going to talk down to them, make them feel like they’re less than... You’re gonna kill motivation.”
— Perry Holly [12:56]
5. The Importance of Belief and Inclusion (18:44–20:47)
- There is a belief deficit in workplaces today.
- Leaders must overtly and authentically communicate belief in their people—not only to build respect and status but to encourage engagement and a sense of belonging.
Quote
“If unintentionally, the intent versus perception gap is growing and we don’t know it, as a leader, our team no doubt thinks that we don’t believe in them. And they already have a little bit of a belief deficit.”
— Chris Goede [18:44]
Memorable Moments & Notable Quotes
- On Inclusion:
“It really is about inclusion and that belonging. I belong here. It's safe here. I'm valued here.”
— Perry Holly [20:13] - On Influence vs. Manipulation:
“The difference between influence and manipulation is motive.”
— Chris Goede [20:21]
Timestamps for Key Segments
- [03:04] – Introduction to Dr. David Yeager’s research and the significance of status/respect
- [04:21] – Defining status and power dynamics in organizations
- [07:59] – Ask, don’t tell: treating adults as equals
- [09:50] – Honoring expertise and inviting opinion
- [12:24] – Status and respect for Gen Z team members
- [14:06] – Validating negative feelings and embracing vulnerability
- [16:04] – Empowerment and agency in teams
- [17:00] – Creating safe spaces and fostering open dialogue
- [18:44] – The leadership challenge: bridging the belief deficit
- [20:13] – Final thoughts on inclusion and influence vs. manipulation
Summary
This episode equips leaders with practical strategies to genuinely communicate status and respect, drive engagement, and close the intent versus perception gap. The actionable takeaways include asking rather than telling, recognizing expertise, validating emotions, empowering decision-making, fostering psychological safety, and consistently expressing belief in people. Especially for younger generations, these practices are not just “nice-to-have” but essential to motivation, retention, and the quality of teamwork.
