Miracle Mentality with Tim Storey – Episode 14

Guest: Dr. Robert Cialdini, “The Godfather of Influence”
Released: November 17, 2025

Episode Overview

In this insightful episode, Tim Storey sits down with world-renowned psychologist Dr. Robert Cialdini, celebrated author of Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion. Together, they explore the art of ethical persuasion, the foundational principles of influence, the nuance of motives, and how mindset and intentional action create extraordinary outcomes in life and business. Through engaging stories, practical wisdom, and a warm, conversational tone, they dive deep into using influence for good and cultivating a “miracle mentality.”

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Dr. Cialdini’s Pivotal Life Choice ([02:03]–[07:27])

• Early Influence: Cialdini almost went pro in baseball, motivated by legendary players.
• Turning Point: A scout withdrew a minor league contract after learning about Cialdini’s academic interests, encouraging him to pursue education—a decision that ultimately led to his career in psychology.
• Contribution Over Status:

  “The thing that I wanted when I was finished professionally was to look back on my life and say…have I made a contribution?” – Dr. Cialdini [05:09]

2. The Heart for Helping Others ([07:27]–[09:08])

• Cialdini emphasizes that personal fulfillment comes from “enhancing the outcomes of people I was dealing with,” not just seeking success or renown.

3. Why Study Persuasion? ([07:27]–[09:08])

• Persuasion is relevant to everyone—people want to be more influential and to recognize when others are persuading them, either ethically or manipulatively.

4. Positive Persuasion and Reciprocity ([09:08]–[13:19])

• Principle of Reciprocity:

  “When you go into a room where you want to be more influential, don’t ask, who can help me most here? Ask whom can I help most here?” – Dr. Cialdini [09:31]

• Giving first—whether information, benefits, or goodwill—leads to stronger relationships and influence.

Memorable Example: The McDonald's Balloon Study ([11:40]–[13:19])

• Children receiving a balloon upon entering McDonald's led families to spend 25% more—emphasizing the power of giving before receiving.

5. Persuasion in Everyday Life ([13:31]–[15:54])

• Storey reminisces about Disneyland’s welcoming environment and how the experience itself persuades guests to keep coming back.
• Cialdini relates this to the universal Golden Rule present in faith and society.

6. Cultural Nuances of Persuasion ([14:48]–[16:18])

• Cialdini describes growing up in a multicultural environment, learning that “persuasion wasn’t one thing; you had to learn the nuances within each new environment.”

7. Defining Ethical Influence ([16:18]–[17:58])

• Ethical influence means “moving people in your direction by informing them into assent”—using honest information, not manipulation.

• “If I don’t honestly tell you what the legitimate experts are saying about my topic, what a fool I am… People want to know what the experts [think].” – Dr. Cialdini [16:28]

8. Principles of Influence in Teaching ([19:20]–[20:17])

• Cialdini teaches social psychology to undergrads and a specialized seminar on influence and persuasion at the upper level.

9. Motive and Authenticity in Persuasion ([20:17]–[23:19])

• Storey raises concerns about impure motives in sales; Cialdini responds that using influence ethically means transparency about motives, credentials, and using genuine social proof.

10. Cultivating Pure Motives in Children ([23:19]–[26:07])

• Criticizing children directly can backfire; storytelling about the consequences of dishonesty is more effective.

• “You can use stories about the problems, the consequences of dishonesty or whatever trait…that you would like to reduce in that child.” – Dr. Cialdini [25:03]

11. Leadership Lessons: Phil Jackson and Optimizing the Next Thing ([26:07]–[28:43])

• Cialdini admires Phil Jackson’s coaching—emphasizing “optimizing the next thing” and training players to focus not on mistakes, but on their next best action.

• “No matter what has just happened, it could be a success or a failure. Optimize the next thing.” – Dr. Cialdini [28:21]

12. Influencer Culture & Humanizing Communication ([29:21]–[31:24])

• Today's influencer marketing thrives because of the craving for genuine human contact.

• “This is draining humanity out of our everyday experience... The more we can restore humanity… the more effective we’re going to be.” – Dr. Cialdini [30:30]

13. Expanding People’s Appetites & Giving Choices ([31:24]–[35:06])

• Storey’s story about trying new food models how gentle persuasion can broaden desires.
• Cialdini says giving people a few meaningful choices (e.g., silver, gold, platinum options) and guiding them honestly helps maximize both satisfaction and ethical influence.

14. Applying Cialdini’s Work: Books and Mastermind Program ([35:23]–[36:51])

• Cialdini recommends Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion (New and Expanded) and describes how his mastermind program focuses on real-world, ethical applications of the seven principles of influence.

15. Can Anyone Be Persuasive? ([36:51]–[39:02])

• Cialdini insists that anyone can learn to be persuasive by applying the seven universal principles:
  • Reciprocation
  • Scarcity
  • Authority
  • Consistency
  • Liking
  • Social Proof
  • Unity

• “If you can honestly show people how you are similar to them…people don’t sink the boats that they’re riding in.” – Dr. Cialdini [38:27]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Go to school, kid… Those two elements combined give you the chance to really make a difference.” – Detroit Tigers Scout, recounted by Dr. Cialdini [03:53]
• “Don’t ask, who can help me most here? Ask whom can I help most here?” – Dr. Cialdini [09:31]
• “There’s not a single major religion that fails to teach the golden rule: do unto others as you would have them do to you.” – Dr. Cialdini [14:22]
• “Ethical influence is moving people in your direction by informing them into assent…” – Dr. Cialdini [16:28]
• “People don’t sink the boats that they’re riding in. And our job is to put people in the boat with us.” – Dr. Cialdini [38:27]
• “No matter what has just happened…Optimize the next thing.” – Dr. Cialdini, citing Phil Jackson's philosophy [28:21]
• “Let’s give people choices. Not a lot that confuses them…but three levels.” – Dr. Cialdini [33:31]

Timestamps of Key Segments

| Timestamp | Topic | |-------------|---------------------------------------------------| | [02:03] | Pivotal career choice: baseball vs. academia | | [05:09] | Cialdini’s guiding principle: making a contribution | | [09:31] | Principle of reciprocity, positive persuasion | | [11:40] | McDonald’s balloon study (real-world persuasion) | | [14:22] | Golden Rule and universal empathy | | [16:28] | Defining ethical influence | | [20:17] | Motive and authenticity in persuasion | | [23:19] | Guiding children’s motives through stories | | [26:07] | Leadership lessons from Phil Jackson | | [29:21] | The influencer economy, humanizing engagement | | [33:31] | The power of giving meaningful choices | | [35:23] | Cialdini’s recommended book and mastermind | | [37:44] | Can anyone learn to be persuasive? |

Summary: Action Steps & Takeaways

• Influence begins with helping others.
  Shift your mindset from “What can I get?” to “How can I give?” Every interaction is an opportunity to create positive reciprocity.
• Be ethically transparent in your persuasion.
  Disclose real expertise, authentic testimonials, and real urgency (scarcity).
• Use stories to inspire and shape motives.
  Especially with children, model the right behaviors and highlight real consequences.
• Humanize your approach.
  Even in the digital age, genuine personal connection is the greatest differentiator.
• Offer meaningful choices and guidance.
  Empower others to choose, informing them openly and favorably.
• Anyone can learn to persuade—by focusing on universal principles.
  Harness reciprocity, scarcity, authority, consistency, liking, social proof, and unity for ethical influence.
• Always ask: Are both sides better off after this interaction?
  Ethical persuasion uplifts both giver and receiver.

For more from Dr. Cialdini:

• Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion (New and Expanded)
• Upcoming Mastermind program (details at his website)

Final encouragement from Tim Storey:
“You may not be what you want to be, but thank God you’re not what you used to be… Continue to plant seeds of goodness and greatness, and live with miracle mentality.”