"Should I Sell My House To Be More Financially Free?" (Listener Intervention)

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Should I Sell My House To Be More Financially Free?" (Listener Intervention)
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Release Date: July 1, 2025

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Introduction

In this episode of Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin, host Nicole engages in a heartfelt and financially insightful intervention with Chelsea, a listener contemplating whether to sell her new home to achieve greater financial freedom. The conversation delves deep into Chelsea's financial situation, her motivations, and the broader implications of homeownership on personal finances.

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Listener Introduction: Chelsea's Dilemma

Timestamp: [02:00] - [03:34]

Chelsea reaches out to Nicole with a pressing question: "Should I sell my new house and downgrade to have more financial freedom?" She provides a comprehensive overview of her financial commitments, including her mortgage, down payment, and other monthly expenses.

Key Financial Details:

• Purchase Price: $769,000 (April 2023)
• Down Payment: $135,000
• Interest Rate: 6.25%
• Total Paid: $169,000 (including extra principal payments)
• Monthly Payment: $4,250 (projected to $4,700 with property taxes)
• Combined Take-Home Income: ~$11,600
• Mortgage as Percentage of Income: 40%

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Comprehensive Financial Overview

Timestamp: [04:04] - [07:33]

Nicole guides Chelsea through a detailed financial assessment to understand her overall financial health.

Emergency Fund:

• Amount: $26,000 in a CD (approximately three months of expenses)
• Status: Satisfactory for current needs

Debt Obligations:

• Credit Card Debt: $4,400 (statement balance, paid off monthly)
• Student Loans: $45,000 (combined)

Retirement Savings:

• Chelsea's 401(k): $64,000
• Husband's 401(k): $45,000
• Ages: 33 and 32

Other Monthly Expenses:

• Vehicle Payments: $550 (Chelsea), $650 (husband)
• Daycare: $800
• Utilities, Insurance, Groceries, etc.

Key Quote:

"The mortgage we moved from was half of what, less than half of what ours is now. And I feel like even in that state we were stressing about money too."
— Chelsea [05:31]

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Motivations Behind Home Purchase

Timestamp: [07:33] - [11:28]

Chelsea explains her rationale for purchasing the current home despite it exceeding her initial budget:

• Historical Success with Real Estate: Previous home purchases led to upgrades and increased property values.
• Desire for Stability: The home is in a preferred location with a desirable school district.
• Emotional Attachment: The process involved placing numerous offers on homes, leading to a strong emotional investment.
• Change in Perspective: Influenced by financial experts like Ramit Sethi, Chelsea re-evaluated her views on homeownership.

Key Quote:

"We looked at this one in the beginning of our search. It was a model home. And I, like, we just looked at it as a joke, honestly. But at the end of the day, my husband was like, the house is black on the outside. He's like, let's just get the black house."
— Chelsea [08:38]

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Impact of Homeownership on Financial Freedom

Timestamp: [11:28] - [16:42]

Chelsea articulates how her current mortgage is limiting her financial freedom and affecting her quality of life:

• Desire for Travel: Wants to afford frequent travel for her three-year-old son.
• Health and Wellness: Aspires to comfortably afford chiropractic visits and personal training without financial strain.
• Lifestyle Choices: Prefers organic, grass-fed, free-range foods but finds them expensive due to tight budgeting.

Key Quote:

"The things that I want to do more of that I feel like the mortgage is holding me back is travel for sure... overall wellness."
— Chelsea [12:00]

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Nicole's Financial Analysis and Guidance

Timestamp: [16:42] - [33:13]

Nicole breaks down Chelsea's financial commitments, highlighting the hidden costs of homeownership:

• Amortized Upgrades: Chelsea revealed an additional $45,000 spent on home upgrades (deck and fencing), which, when broken down monthly, significantly increases her financial obligations.

Key Points:

• Total Monthly Commitment: $4,700 (mortgage) + $3,750 (upgrades) = Approximately $8,450
• Comparison to Income: Significantly higher than comfortable budget allocations
• Maintenance Costs: Even in new homes, unexpected repairs can strain finances

Key Quote:

"Now it's all coming out... what is it? Yeah, it's another 40,000."
— Chelsea [32:58]

Nicole emphasizes the importance of recognizing these additional costs and reassessing financial priorities to determine if the current home truly aligns with Chelsea's financial and personal goals.

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Emotional and Psychological Considerations

Timestamp: [20:15] - [36:24]

The conversation shifts to the emotional factors influencing Chelsea's decision:

• Family History: Both Chelsea and her husband witnessed their parents lose their homes due to financial mismanagement, fostering a cautious approach to their finances.
• Personal Fulfillment vs. Financial Security: Balancing the emotional satisfaction derived from homeownership against the tangible benefits of financial flexibility.
• Upcoming Considerations: Legal constraints in Minnesota requiring a two-year ownership period to avoid capital gains taxes, aligning with their son's schooling schedule.

Key Quote:

"Money without meaning is just paper."
— Nicole Lapin [21:53]

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Nicole's Recommendations and Next Steps

Timestamp: [33:13] - [37:34]

Nicole provides actionable advice to help Chelsea navigate her financial and emotional turmoil:

1. Evaluate Total Costs: Assess the real cost of homeownership, including upgrades, maintenance, and property taxes.
2. Explore Alternatives: Consider downsizing within the same area, potentially through a 1031 exchange, to maintain location stability while reducing financial strain.
3. Collaborate with Professionals: Engage with a real estate agent to understand market options and consult financial advisors to plan effectively.
4. Prioritize Personal Goals: Decide which aspects of life (e.g., travel, wellness) are most important and adjust financial commitments accordingly.

Key Quote:

"Keep it real with yourself. Like, understand what this money pit is and understand, like, how that's all adding up and that's causing more stress."
— Nicole Lapin [35:49]

Chelsea expresses relief after articulating her concerns and acknowledges the need to reassess her financial priorities without the added burden of unnecessary home improvements.

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Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Timestamp: [37:34] - End

The episode concludes with Chelsea feeling more confident about her decision-making process. She commits to taking a year to thoroughly evaluate her options and promises to keep Nicole updated on her progress.

Final Quote:

"I'm not gonna worry about it... I think that I knew that that reassurance and."
— Chelsea [36:45]

Nicole reiterates her support, encouraging Chelsea to continue prioritizing her personal fulfillment alongside financial stability.

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Key Takeaways

1. Comprehensive Financial Assessment: Understanding all costs associated with homeownership is crucial in evaluating its impact on financial freedom.
2. Emotional vs. Financial Priorities: Balancing personal satisfaction from owning a home with the ability to afford desired life experiences.
3. Importance of Flexibility: Being open to reassessing and adjusting financial commitments to align with evolving personal and financial goals.
4. Seeking Professional Guidance: Collaborating with financial advisors and real estate professionals can provide clarity and aid in making informed decisions.

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Notable Quotes

• Chelsea:
  "The mortgage we moved from was half of what, less than half of what ours is now. And I feel like even in that state we were stressing about money too."
  [05:31]

• Nicole:
  "Money without meaning is just paper."
  [21:53]

• Chelsea:
  "The things that I want to do more of that I feel like the mortgage is holding me back is travel for sure... overall wellness."
  [12:00]

• Nicole:
  "Keep it real with yourself. Like, understand what this money pit is and understand, like, how that's all adding up and that's causing more stress."
  [35:49]

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Conclusion

This episode of Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin offers a profound exploration of the complexities surrounding homeownership and financial freedom. Through Chelsea's honest dialogue and Nicole's expert guidance, listeners gain valuable insights into balancing personal aspirations with financial responsibilities. The conversation underscores the importance of aligning financial decisions with one's values and long-term goals to achieve true financial well-being.

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For more episodes and financial advice, visit Money News Network and follow them on Instagram and TikTok @moneyNewsNetwork.

Transcript

[Nicole Lapin]

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[Chelsea]

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[Chelsea]

I'm Nicole Lapin, the only financial expert you don't need a dictionary to understand it's time for some Money Rehab. One of my absolute favorite things to do on this show is to talk to you, my money rehabbers. So I am beyond excited today to do exactly that. You're about to hear a conversation I had with money rehabber Chelsea who DM'd me asking, should I sell my dream home to give myself and my husband more financial freedom? With the state of the real estate market right now, I know Chelsea is not the only one thinking this. So I'm taking you behind the scenes into what I told her. And spoiler alert, we have a major breakthrough here. Here's our conversation.

[Nicole Lapin]

Chelsea, welcome to Mini Rehab.

[Chelsea]

Hi, Nicole. Thanks so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here.

[Nicole Lapin]

I'm so excited that you're here and I know you have an important question that you want to tackle today together. Can you share that question with our listeners?

[Chelsea]

Of course. My question is, should I sell my new house and downgrade to have more financial freedom?

[Nicole Lapin]

It is a Beautiful question. So not only did I know that that was your question, because of course you sent it to me before, but you also sent the purchase price of your house, photos of your house, your monthly expenses and income spreadsheet with charts and graphs. I am obsessed with you, basically. So thank you for doing all that.

[Chelsea]

You went above and beyond.

[Nicole Lapin]

Let's follow the money trail here. Let's follow the numbers trail. I have a bunch of questions, but first, let's go over the purchase price of your house.

[Chelsea]

Yes. So we purchased this home a year ago for 769,000. It's a new home.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay. Happy houseiversary.

[Chelsea]

Yes, thank you.

[Nicole Lapin]

April of 2023.

[Chelsea]

Okay, cool.

[Nicole Lapin]

And what was the down payment?

[Chelsea]

It was $135,000.

[Nicole Lapin]

And your interest rate?

[Chelsea]

6.25%, which we bought some points to get it there.

Okay, cool.

[Nicole Lapin]

And how much have you paid off so far?

[Chelsea]

So the total paid off is 169,000. So we've made some extra payments a couple of times. So.

[Nicole Lapin]

Lovely. Toward the principal.

[Chelsea]

Yes.

[Nicole Lapin]

Cool.

[Chelsea]

Okay.

[Nicole Lapin]

And what is your monthly payment?

[Chelsea]

So it's currently $4,250. But since it's a new home, the taxes don't really fully assess until June. So right now it's 4250. But when the taxes come up, it'll be around 4700.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay, so 4700 is inclusive of basically a pro rata share of what your yearly property taxes will be.

[Chelsea]

Yes.

Cool.

[Nicole Lapin]

I'm glad that you did that. Some people forget about property taxes and are like, damn it. And so you split 4700 roughly with your partner, right?

[Chelsea]

Yes.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay. And do you know approximately how much maintenance is going into the house or is that is the 4700 inclusive of maintenance as well as taxes?

[Chelsea]

Oh, gosh. Now there's nothing tied to maintenance that we pay on, I guess, a monthly basis. We haven't, you know, with it being new, knock on wood. We haven't had any real issues thus far, but I'm not sure what that. What that number would be.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay, but so far it hasn't been significant. I mean, those types of things unfortunately happen usually at the worst times.

[Chelsea]

Right.

[Nicole Lapin]

Yeah. Something to just think about, factor in. So your combined income after taxes with your partner is 11,600 ish. Yeah.

[Chelsea]

Yes, yes, correct.

[Nicole Lapin]

So your mortgage is 40% of your take home pay.

[Chelsea]

Correct.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay, can we go through a bigger checklist of your overall financial picture? Do you have an emergency fund?

[Chelsea]

Yes, we do have $26,000 in a CD right now.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay. And that is. It sounds like three months of expenses in the bank.

[Chelsea]

Yeah, I would say.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay.

[Chelsea]

And you feel, I mean, for both of us. I feel good about it. I definitely. I mean, obviously always wishing that it's more, but I feel okay about it.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay. And you both have consistent jobs and skills that where you could get another job if, God forbid, you lost your jobs.

[Chelsea]

Correct.

[Nicole Lapin]

Sweet. What other expenses do you guys have right now?

[Chelsea]

So we have our vehicles, older vehicles. My husband is. Well, he cares more about vehicles than I do. My car is almost paid off. I pay 550amonth for the vehicle itself. He pays around 650 for his truck. We have daycare that is around $800 a month. We have student loans that are around $800 a month. As far as other reoccurring things like home insurance, car insurance, obviously, utilities for the home, things like that. And then, you know, the basics of groceries and, you know, maintenance appointments for ourselves and all the fun stuff and.

[Nicole Lapin]

Do you have credit card debt?

[Chelsea]

Well, I checked this morning. We have like $4,400 in credit card debt right now.

[Nicole Lapin]

Is that debt or is that just your statement balance?

[Chelsea]

The statement balance.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay. And you pay it off in full every month?

[Chelsea]

Mostly. Okay.

[Nicole Lapin]

Are you saving for retirement?

[Chelsea]

Yes. We both have 401k programs, so I have an employer match of 8%, which is great. My husband has one of the 4%, so we both contribute the matching amount.

[Nicole Lapin]

Do you know approximately how much is in there?

[Chelsea]

I have about 64,000 and I think he has around 45,000.

[Nicole Lapin]

And how old are you guys?

[Chelsea]

I am 33 and he is 32.

[Nicole Lapin]

And do you have any other kind of debt?

[Chelsea]

Student debt is 45,000 for the two of us, but other than that, no.

[Nicole Lapin]

And why did you buy a house?

[Chelsea]

Well, in the past, real estate has worked out for me personally. I've owned a couple of different homes in the last decade and was able to kind of like upgrade as I've owned the next house with the proceeds I got from the previous home. We bought a house this go around because this is where we want to live and this is the school district we want to be in. And I think we will be here for a long period of time. And so it just made sense for us. I go back and forth because I think about it, we were originally going to build a home and that would have required us to rent for a little while. And I don't know why, that just freaked me out. Like, no, we can't possibly rent and Lose money. But I have been doing a ton of research in the last couple of years listening to you, and I'm a big fan of, like, Ramit Sethi, so definitely changed my mindset in that capacity. But, yeah, it's also. I hate that it's, like, the thing to do. And I don't necessarily see it as a massive accomplishment as I used to, but we had been looking for a while. We wanted to be in this area, and it was. It was, I guess, a rough market when we were looking. We bought this house specifically speak, after we had made, I don't know, 20 some offers on other homes that just, you know, we were outbid or. And it was for stuff that I really didn't love, you know, so that just kind of bugged me that we were going back and forth, like, fighting so hard for these homes that just, to me, I was like, I don't even like the place, so I don't care. They can have it. And so, yeah, we looked at this one in the beginning of our search. It was a model home. And I, like, we just looked at it as a joke, honestly. But at the end of the day, my husband was like, the house is black on the outside. He's like, let's just get the black house. Let's just offer them what they want. Let's just do it. So we did, and here we are.

[Nicole Lapin]

And why was it a joke in the beginning? Because of the color?

[Chelsea]

No, I love the color. Because of the cost.

[Nicole Lapin]

Oh, because it was out of your budget. What were you. What range were you looking at or hoping for?

[Chelsea]

We were hoping to buy something around 600,000.

[Nicole Lapin]

And I think when you refer to some of our episodes and Ramit's episodes, he and I both agree that, you know, what people don't often think about when they're buying a home is, you know, all the stuff that you don't get back. You know, the interest payments, the maintenance, the closing costs, the property taxes, all of the things that don't get factored into an equation. When you say, like, grandma bought a house for, you know, 50 grand, and now it's, you know, 500 grand, you also don't factor in inflation and opportunity cost of what that, you know, 50 grand could have been doing in the stock market over that period of time. So. So is that essentially what you're referring to, like. Like a perspective that you hadn't heard before?

[Chelsea]

Absolutely, yes.

[Nicole Lapin]

And so was the goal for buying a house because it sounds like you want to stay there for a while? Was it to make money. It sounds like you weren't even coming to it from that perspective at this point. It sounds like you wanted to your face off, live in that area, stay there for a long time. Right. So you weren't looking at this as like a quote unquote investment. You were looking at it as a home or your family.

[Chelsea]

Right?

I, I would say, you know, there is that part of me that, you know, years down the road we'll be able to sell it for X amount, but when that will be or how the economy or market will be at that time, who know. So yes, I think by the time we decided to buy this house, it was just love the house, we can make it work. So go for it.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay, so this is all really helpful. Chelsea, you want to know basically if you should have more financial freedom than you have right now, which I think is super interesting because for some having a dream home near family, in great school district, in a place that you want to be in for a long time is financial freedom. So do you feel like you're not able to do things that you want to do right now because of your mortgage? Is it holding you back from doing something and what is that something?

[Chelsea]

Yeah, I think so. It's, you know, it's just kind of like moving into this beautiful home and it's not like it's super large by, by any means, but it's, I mean it's great, but it's not. I've lived in other homes that are not this nice and I had more money in the bank and it seems like that time it was kind of just a little bit more of a relief. But the things that I want to do more of that I feel like the mortgage is holding me back is travel for sure. You know, my three year old has a passport. We want to make sure that he and we can see the world and travel a ton and then just like overall wellness. I wish I had more money for, I said the other day, like, I just want to be financially stable enough where I can go to the chiropractor twice a week and not have to worry about what it costs. You know, seeing a personal trainer is on the top of the list. We eat grass fed, organic free range food which is very expensive and I just don't love having to worry about that. And so those are some of the things just overall quality of life, I think.

[Nicole Lapin]

Well, I love that you can really, really articulate what financial freedom is for you because it's different for everyone. Going to the chiropractor twice a week without worrying about it. And being able to order as much or buy at the grocery store as much. Grass fed, free range, organic, artisanal, like whatever meat you possib possibly can and can consume is, is a really, really helpful baseline. So it sounds like by paying the mortgage every month of 47ish hundred bucks, you know, I'd maybe round that up a little bit more because maintenance will happen. Where would you ideally like to be in order to feel comfortable enough to do the chiropractor, to do the traveling and to do all the, all the meats your heart desire?

[Chelsea]

Yeah, see and that's the thing, because the mortgage we moved from was half of what, less than half of what our is now. And I feel like even in that state we were stressing about money too.

Hold onto your wallets.

[Nicole Lapin]

Money rehab will be right back.

[Chelsea]

And now for some more money rehab.

The mortgage we moved from was half of what, less than half of what our is now. And I feel like even in that state we were stressing about money too and just, you know, not having, we didn't have enough egg at that point. Of course our careers have shifted a little bit and we've gotten a few raises over the last couple of years, but I think it was just such a big jump. And I mean ideally the mortgage would be around 3,000. Like I think that's more reasonable. Like if we round up and we say okay, $5,000 a month. I feel like there's a, there's a knife in my heart. Like it's just a big number to spend on housing, I think. So I think around that 3,000 would be great. You know, and we moved in here and we did account for, okay, we have a six and a quarter percent interest rate and there's potential for that going down over the years, but you never know. I mean if it did go down a percent or two, that would be wonderful and that would ease a lot of the pain. But you never know with that.

[Nicole Lapin]

So have you been already looking at other options? Do you think that you would want to downsize to another home you purchased or rent for a while? Would you want to be in the same area?

[Chelsea]

Yeah, I would definitely want to be in the same area for now. And I, you know, I had, I had been looking at a lot of different options in the area. And that's what sucks the most is that you know, you have, yes, there are really expensive, really nice houses, but then there are also really expensive, not so nice houses that are, you know, I Feel like even if we were in that $500,000 range to get us to 3,000amonth, like that's probably as low as I would consider going just in terms of the quality of the house. But then, even then, if I take, you know, all of the equity from this home and put it on that home, work through the numbers now of interest rates, it's like not that big of a difference in terms of monthly payments.

[Nicole Lapin]

Yeah, it sounds like the process of going through buying and looking at 20 homes and, and feeling just like deflated pushed you into this place that you feel as, as nice of a house as it is. You know, a house can never feel safe if it feels like a financial prison for whatever reason. And I say when people will tell me that they feel like they need for childhood trauma reasons or whatever reasons, like it doesn't matter to me if you feel like having a home will give you safety, that's as good a reason as any. Even though it doesn't make long term wealth generating sense across the board as some might think and default to as like their idea that we've been told and brainwashed that homeownership is the ticket to long term generational wealth. I mean there's just so many holes in that argument and really glad that you are now seeing it from different angles. But you're also not telling me that you are feeling like this is something that's going to make your heart happy, maybe in the way that travel would. I mean I would for sure tell you if you couldn't afford this house, it's 40% of your take home pay. Ideally it'd be around like 35% but I think you can afford it. You're just cutting out things that really do make life worth living for you, including the chiropractor, including the travel. You know, I told somebody to call off their wedding because they had too much debt. So I'm not scared to tell you what I really think about it. But I'm not sure if this home is providing that security that you had wanted and the experiences that you wanted.

[Chelsea]

Yeah, and I, I think that's true most of the time. I mean, and then I think about, you know, I may I have potential for a new opportunity that would give us a lot more financial freedom in the next three to four years the way that it works out with the doc and bonus structure and, and things like that. So I think of it as, you know, if three or four years from now we will be in like a much, you know, safer place. Financially, then is it worth it to give it up? Because I do still. I love the house. I love the community, I love the neighborhood. Have to put in there the pain in the ass that moving is and finding a new.

[Nicole Lapin]

Just about to say. I mean. Yeah. Have you really thought through what that looks like?

[Chelsea]

Yeah, I mean, I definitely don't want to do it if I don't have to. But again, you know, my, my husband and I both come from families that were terrible at managing money and we were both in situations where when we were in high school, our parents lost their home due to just financial instability. And it's not, I mean, financial stupidity is what it actually was like. There was no huge hardship. There just wasn't. They just weren't smart. So I think that we are just very cautious in a lot of the things that we, that we do financially and just want to make sure that we're not putting ourselves in, in a bad spot ever.

[Nicole Lapin]

Well, thank you for sharing that. I actually feel very similarly. I saw my house got foreclosed on as a kid and I have never equated owning a home with financial freedom or Safet because it wasn't for me. I would much rather personally have more money growing in the stock market over time and feeling like I have the ability to take out that money than having a pile of bricks or mortar, wood or whatever the fuck houses are made of. But that's personal. And I've had to do a lot of soul searching and asking myself hard questions. And so it sounds like you're getting to that place too. I think from a financial standpoint, you can afford this home. You're going to probably make those other sacrifices. And I, and this is not a cop out, I can't answer that for you. What's more important in your life? Because, Chelsea, I don't wake up in your life every day. You have to wake up in your life every day and you have to ask yourself, really, I think you're in a, in a good position where you have the true choice. You're not like doing this out of panic and fear. This is not a fire sale situation. You're doing it from a place of strength. You could go either way and make it work. You just have to really decide which path is going to make you most happy and most fulfilled. Look, money without meaning is just paper. I've said it many times. And so what meaning does it have for you? That's the biggest question. That's like time you get a bottle of wine. You, you know, look in the mirror.

[Chelsea]

Yeah.

[Nicole Lapin]

Or actually, I don't know, whatever you want to do. And. And say, like, what is the life I want to live? Because at some point, right. The sins of the father or the mother are not bestowed on the son or the daughter. And so just because you saw it play out a certain way, sometimes we overreact because we want something totally different, or sometimes we follow in the same patterns as our parents because that's what we saw. And so it sounds like. And your husband saw, you know, similar behavior that I saw that was overextending for a home, ultimately losing the home. And so you wanted to be extra cautious. You have been cautious and you have been really responsible. So you've rightfully kind of maybe overcorrected, even to a place where you now have the choice. So how are you feeling now that we've discussed those?

[Chelsea]

Good, good. I feel better now that we. That I've even just, like, said it out loud and laid it on the table and, you know, brought up the fact that I have this opportunity where we could be, you know, debt free, aside from the mortgage, in less than a handful of years. And then also I feel comfortable in the spot that I'm in because, you know, in Minnesota, if you. You have to live in a home for two. I don't know if this is how it is everywhere. You have to live in a home for two years, otherwise you have to pay capital gains on, you know, any proceeds that you make. So we have a year until the two year. And then also my son, you know, he's three and a half, so we have a year and a half until he would potentially start school somewhere, so we wouldn't have to, you know, disrupt that. Him in any way in that position.

[Nicole Lapin]

I think that you have another year to really think about whether or not you would want to make a change. You would probably do like a 1031 exchange like you did in the past, I'm assuming, so you would just roll that over to another home. So maybe in the next year you take a look at some of the other houses in that 3K range and you're smart to really think through the interest rate and where you can get to that number every month that you feel good with. It sounds like you don't want to rent, but so for buying where you could potentially move that would be in that range, just like, take a look and see what's out there. And, you know, I love housing porn. I look at it all the time for a variety of reasons. And sometimes, like when you're unhappy with the job, you go on LinkedIn or another job site and you can just feel better knowing that you have something better than what's out there. So in order to really understand your values, take a look at the comp of the area and you, I don't know what you're going to find. You could either find a bunch of shitty options out there and you're like, okay, well I got this out of my system or you could say, wow, the, you know, there are great other options that I could be really happy with. And I have decided that, you know, my day to day lifestyle and being comfortable going to as much personal training and whatever else your husband wants to do is really important to us. And that's cool. And like there are some great options. Maybe meet with a real estate agent. Do you work with one to see the state of the market in your area?

[Chelsea]

Yep, for sure. She's already called.

[Nicole Lapin]

Oh really? Like what happened?

[Chelsea]

Three months. She called like three months ago and was, we were dealing with something with this, a new build home. Sometimes things happen, whatever. But she was like, oh yeah, we could probably, you know, your house is at like 8:25 now if you think, you know. But you know, we put on a deck and we put in fencing and so that was another 45K. So I'm like, yeah, okay, now I.

[Nicole Lapin]

Understand a little bit more why you're feeling the pain because your payments weren't, you know, $4,700 if you amortize what those upgrades were and put it into your monthly payment.

[Chelsea]

No, we paid cash for that.

[Nicole Lapin]

Oh, I know, yeah, I know. But like, but you, so you're saying you put in $45,000 over the last year, correct?

[Chelsea]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay, so over 12 months.

[Chelsea]

Yes.

[Nicole Lapin]

So do you, so do you know how much that is a month?

[Chelsea]

No.

[Nicole Lapin]

It'S $3,750. So plus $4,700. I mean you're, you're in essence paying on your house if you take what your upgrades have been. And that's why I was asking for maintenance because maintenance, upgrades, you know, all of the stuff that you put in the house, it's like a money pit. So.

[Chelsea]

Sure.

[Nicole Lapin]

You've actually like been paying if you take the upgrades and amortize it over your payments like closer to 8, $500 a month.

[Chelsea]

Don't even say it. Yeah.

[Nicole Lapin]

So that's why you're feeling the pain.

[Chelsea]

Yeah, I mean we had, you know, like I said I was, I'm somewhat comfortable with our emergency savings, but it was a hell of a lot more. $45,000 more. And that, I don't know. I think that doing these things, I don't know, in my mind were necessary, but still, definitely a pain point.

[Nicole Lapin]

Yeah. So interesting. And when I tell you that your actual home contributions were closer to 84, 8500 bucks a month if you divide 45 by 12 and add it on to your monthly payments, does. How does that make you feel?

[Chelsea]

Not great.

[Nicole Lapin]

Are we unpacking a little bit more of, like, why you feel like this is such a money sick money pit? Because maybe homeowners forget is like, you know, you, You. You left out a huge part of this. Right. You left out a huge home expense. That seems like once I discovered it or once you were telling me about your call with your realtor. I feel like I hit on a nerve.

[Chelsea]

Hold onto your wallets.

[Nicole Lapin]

Money rehab will be right back.

[Chelsea]

And now for some more money rehab.

[Nicole Lapin]

I feel like I hit on a nerve. And, like, you didn't even tell me. You told me, like, basically down to the dollar, what you have in all these different accounts.

[Chelsea]

But that.

[Nicole Lapin]

That was a huge home expenditure.

[Chelsea]

Yeah. And I didn't even think. I don't even, you know, I didn't even think about it. I think about it as much as. Or in line with. I think about the down payment, you know, and we bought this house knowing that we would do these two things immediately, the deck and the fence. And so we took that money and the down payment money and put it aside. And then it was. That was that. So I kind of bucket that money in with, like, the down payment situation, where that amount of money just giving it away, or not giving it away, but purchasing something in one day, you know, then it's gone. It just makes you want to throw up.

[Nicole Lapin]

I. I feel. I feel your pain now. So I. I understand why you're feeling stressed. You're feeling stretched because you overe. You wanted a $600,000 home. You were mentally prepared for that. You probably. If you would have called me a year ago, I probably would have told you to, like, hang out without your deck and fence for a minute, like, get comfortable with this higher payment because you, you know, overextended, you were exhausted by the search. You put in a bunch of offers. You went with the black house. It was more than your budget. But then you added 45 extra thousand dollars in cash into it. And so now you're feeling extra stretched.

[Chelsea]

Yes, for sure.

[Nicole Lapin]

It's an investment. Like, if it's a long term Investment, potentially that could. You could get back or not, or you could have beautiful memories on your deck or like, I don't know, what you do with a fence hanging. Your three year old hanging on a fence. And you'll have, you know, pictures forever. And. And those are important and valuable and maybe priceless, too.

[Chelsea]

Yeah.

[Nicole Lapin]

But I would just. I would just factor in the real cost of the homeownership, and that includes upgrades, maintenance, the unexpected stuff.

[Chelsea]

Yeah.

[Nicole Lapin]

Talking about. Yeah. Your real cost versus and because I was so proud of you, I was so excited that you came and you were like, this is including, you know, what a amortized amount of property taxes is for a year. Like, because oftentimes people will say, well, here's my, you know, payment, but not include maintenance, upgrades, property taxes, and those add up. So I would just go back, think about what that real number is and see if you're comfortable with that, and then see what the other options are in the area and see if you are, you know, if maybe the grass is greener. Hey, cliches. But, like, I don't know, is the grass greener or not? I have no idea. And neither do you yet.

[Chelsea]

Right. And then adding in anything that we potentially want to do to this current house. And it's not like, I mean. I mean, not that it never ends, Chelsea. It never ends because I'm like, you.

[Nicole Lapin]

Know, what else do you guys want to do?

[Chelsea]

Well, I want to do. My husband could. Could care less. Could not care less. But, I mean, I'm in my office right now, and there's white walls and white doors and white windows and white carpet. And I'm just like, no.

[Nicole Lapin]

I know. I did find it a little suspicious when you joined Zoom and you used a digital background of another house and didn't use your house.

[Chelsea]

No. Right. Seriously, My office is like the. It's the most plain area and I work remote a ton, so I'm like, what can I do in. I mean, I know what I want to do, but it's just not in the cards right now, is it?

[Nicole Lapin]

Not in the cards. Okay, so it sounds like you're there for a year. Get comfortable with that. My recommendation is price out what these upgrades are. Like, get really clear about what they are. I mean, is it a can of paint at Home Depot and like, you know, some. Some of the. Whatever. I don't. I'm terrible at painting the blue tape stuff.

[Chelsea]

Like, is that you can't. I can't do that. No. I'm so bad. Like, I would mess it up. Royally.

[Nicole Lapin]

I mean, great self awareness. You and me both. Okay, so like, price out what those upgrades are. You know, divide those by. Divide that lump sum by 12, add that onto your existing payments. See what that is.

[Chelsea]

Yeah, I already know what that is. I gotta. I had someone come and just price out everything.

[Nicole Lapin]

Oh, now it's all coming out. Chelsea, 45 minutes later, we get to pull this out of you. Okay, what is it?

[Chelsea]

Yeah, it's another 40,000.

[Nicole Lapin]

Oh, my God.

[Chelsea]

But it's not, it's. It's not like it's going to happen. Like, I just want to know how much is this going to be if I were to do these things that I want to do to these spaces?

[Nicole Lapin]

Okay, well, what I'm going to tell you is no. Yeah, no, like, stay in the house. You're going to have shit that breaks and goes down that's unexpected you. Even if it's a new build. And oftentimes with new builds, they like, you know, cut corners and make it look really nice from the outside, but it's like really crappy, whatever that breaks. And you know what, I don't know, the faucets and the fixtures and this and then that. So, like, just assume you're going to have some of that happen this year. Yeah. So why don't you just spend the rest of the year, first of all, sort of dating other opportunities, just like going around to go doing a little house dating. And also just see if you feel comfortable with like the baseline of what your mortgage is without another 40, $45,000. By the way, like, it's always overtime over budget for any. You know, you wanted to build a house, but any home improvement stuff is always. Stuff always goes wrong. And like, it will probably be closer to $45,000. Right. So you're doing a whole other big thing that's adding to this pain that's making you feel. So, so why don't we just not do that and stay in the house that you can afford if you don't add all these tens of thousands of dollars extra?

[Chelsea]

Yeah, yeah, I think that's fair. Yeah, I got that quote months ago and I was like, well, just put it away because that's not gonna happen.

[Nicole Lapin]

Or like DIY Face off.

[Chelsea]

I don't know.

[Nicole Lapin]

Or like, maybe there's another option.

[Chelsea]

Yeah, I'll have to look into it.

[Nicole Lapin]

I would tell you because, like the girl that I told or the woman that I told to cancel her wedding, I was like, hey, next time I'm in your area, like, we could for sure. I'll go to Michael's. We'll get party favor. Like, I'll throw you a backyard party. You don't need all the fancy stuff that you're planning. I would. You know, so I'm inclined to be like, next time I'm in Minneapolis, I'll grab my overalls. But, like, I'm not. I'm not.

[Chelsea]

No. And I listened to that episode, and I will say I spent $1,000 on my wedding, so.

[Nicole Lapin]

I love that. No, listen, I'm not here to, like, rain on your parade. I think travel and chiropractors and grass fed meat, all that stuff is important. And I'm, like, not here to poo poo on fancy party favors and wedding dresses and whatever else, but, like, keep it real. Yeah, I mean, keep it real with yourself. Like, understand what this money pit is and understand, like, how that's all adding up and that's causing more stress.

[Chelsea]

Yeah, for sure. That makes a lot of sense. I never would have thought of the 45k paid out monthly, but.

Yeah, or take a lot of fun.

[Nicole Lapin]

Or take that budget because you. You paid it last year. Take some of that and. And get yourself a freaking chiropractor.

[Chelsea]

I do have one. I just don't go as much as I would like.

[Nicole Lapin]

But. Yeah, maybe the chiropractor can help you with some paint.

[Chelsea]

You can. She can.

[Nicole Lapin]

All right, well, how are you feeling now?

[Chelsea]

Good. Yeah, I feel okay. I'm gonna do. I'm not gonna worry about it. I mean, like you said. I appreciate you saying that. You would tell me if you thought I was batshit crazy and should get the hell out of this mortgage asap, but that's not the case. And I think that I knew that that reassurance and.

[Nicole Lapin]

Yeah, yeah, you're thinking about it realistically. You're not saying to me, like, oh, my gosh, I'm gonna be in this house and putting all these upgrades in and we're gonna flip it for, you know, 2 million bucks like that. Some people think that they're gonna, you know, do that and. And be a home filipper and. And make tons of money, and you're not coming to it from that standpoint. And I think you're. You're really realistic about that, which is awesome. I just think for the next year, get some more clarity and then come back. We'll be here. We're always here.

[Chelsea]

All right, sounds good. That sounds like a plan. I will keep you posted. I'm gonna. I'm gonna chill for a while, but then I'll keep you posted.

[Nicole Lapin]

And next time, I want to see your re, like, this really nice house that you bought. Like, next time, no fake background.

[Chelsea]

Okay, that sounds good. I can do that.

Money Rehab is a production of Money News Network. I'm your host, Nicole Lapin. Money Rehab's executive producer is Morgan Lavoy. Our researcher is Emily Holmes. Do you need some money Rehab? And let's be honest, we all do. So email us your money questions, money rehaboneynewsnetwork.com to potentially have your questions answered on the show or even have a one on one intervention with me. And follow us on Instagramoneynews and TikTokoneyNewsnetwork for exclusive video content. And lastly, thank you. No, seriously, thank you. Thank you for listening and for investing in yourself, which is the most important investment you can make.