Transcript
Ash (0:00)
Hey, weirdos, it's Ash. Before we dive into today's twisted tale, let me tell you about the spooky perks of Wondery. It's like having a skeleton key that unlocks ad free listening and early access to new episodes. So don't wait. Try Wondery. Today. You can join Wonder plus in the Wondery app or in Apple podcasts or Spotify. You're listening to a Morbid network podcast. Let Audible expand your life by listening explore over 1 million audiobooks and exclusive Audible originals that'll inspire and motivate you. You all in one easy app. Tap into your well being with advice and insight from leading professionals and experts on better health, relationships, career, finance, investing and more. Maybe you want to kick a bad habit or start a good one. Speaking of, I'm actually listening to the Secret on Audible. I love that title so much and 10 out of 10 recommend the soundscaping is pristine. Get advice and insight from leading professionals and experts on health, relationship, career, finance, investing, and more. There's so much opportunity to learn and more to imagine when you listen. Start listening today when you sign up for a free 30 day trial at audible.commorbid there's a lot in life that feels like it should be guaranteed, but it just isn't. Things like your friends being on their way when they text you omw. Or getting out the same number of socks from the dryer that you put in. AT&T is introducing a new guarantee, the AT&T guarantee. Because there's a lot in life that's not guaranteed. The AT&T guarantee means connectivity you can depend on, deals you want and service you deserve, or they'll make it right. Visit att.comguarantee to learn more. AT&T connecting changes everything. Terms and conditions apply. Visit att.comguarantee for details.
Elena (1:44)
Hey, weirdos. I'm Elena. I'm Ash. And this is morbid.
Ash (2:02)
It's morbid. And today I'm being bullied in the office, everybody.
Elena (2:05)
Honestly, I can't even, like, say that's not happening.
Ash (2:08)
No, I'm l I'm getting actively bullied by not only my sister, but also my employee and friend Mikey. I burped. And you know, people burp.
Elena (2:20)
Okay, let me just.
Ash (2:23)
No, hold on.
Elena (2:24)
She's saying it like she burped. Oh, I just burped once.
Ash (2:27)
No, I wasn't finished yet. But you're just still bullying me. No, we always burp a lot in here. It's kind of our thing. And Elena burps all the time and it literally Feels like it spra blood at people because they feel so sharp coming out of her fucking face. It's like. And you're like, oh, my God. Duck and cover. Somebody call someone. She's bleeding out of every orifice. And then I burp. And it. You know, they're a little liquidy, like. Like they're not liquidy. Like, I taste liquid. This is so gross. But, like, it's fine. But they. They sound a little yuccas. Elena has told me for all of my life. But they sound like the Bog of Eternal Stench. But today, everyone decided to go deeper. It's like an episode of the Vile in here. We're going deeper. And Mikey said to me. Mikey said to me, you know, actually, I feel pity for my mouth. Is my jaw unclicked from the top part, and it's on the floor. Pity. You pity me? He pities your burps, which are part of me. Which are part of me. And so I got upset with him, and then he was like, no, no, no, let me backtrack. Except dig my hole even further. And he said, do you know what it is? And I looked at him and I said, don't it up. Don't dig this hole. And this Got a power shovel. He said, I used to work in a hospital. What the does that have to do with anything? I sound like a hospital. This is like Mary Cosby telling me that I smell like hospital. So anyway, I'm upset.
