When Motherhood Doesn’t Feel Like Enough, God Still Says It Is

Summary

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More Than Reality with Adam and Danielle Busby

Episode 75: "When Motherhood Doesn’t Feel Like Enough, God Still Says It Is"

Release Date: March 19, 2026
Hosts: Adam and Danielle Busby

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Episode Overview

This heart-to-heart episode dives deep into the shifting dynamics of the Busby family’s daily reality now that their TLC show "OutDaughtered" has ended. Adam and Danielle candidly discuss the challenges and joys of entering a new season in their family and marriage, focusing on Danielle's struggle with identity and purpose as she transitions away from a busy working life to being primarily a stay-at-home mom. They explore themes of self-worth, trust, changing roles, faith, and the beauty (and difficulty) of embracing God’s calling—even when it doesn’t “feel like enough.”

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Family Life Behind the Scenes

• The family recently traveled to Phoenix, Arizona, mixing work duties (Adam as Grand Marshal at the Good Rancher 250) with family time.
• Danielle recounts the chaos of coordinating six daughters while Adam’s busy at the racetrack, her efforts to watch the race on her phone, and the girls’ excitement seeing their dad on TV.
• The Busbys prioritize simple, down-to-earth experiences for their girls, such as hikes, outdoor adventures, and impromptu rock and flower collecting.

Danielle: “It wasn’t… We may not have gotten up all the way to the mountain peak, but where we got was still beautiful. It was so fun to celebrate that, you know, take pictures…” (13:39)

2. Transitioning Roles & Identity Struggle

• Danielle opens up about her lifelong habit of working and financially contributing, and the discomfort she feels now being “just a mom,” a role she never thought would be her only identity.
• She discusses the tension between desiring to “do more” and accepting God’s calling for this chapter: to focus on family and home—even if the world (and sometimes herself) tells her it isn’t enough.

Danielle: “For someone who has had to work… literally my whole life, to now lay under the lines of, like, I’m not even having to do, I’m just having to take care of. Which is so weird to me because that was never, in my mind, never perceived as enough.” (36:50)

• Adam relates to her struggle and acknowledges the pressure of being the primary provider and the increased weight on his shoulders.

Adam: “I feel like a lot busier… more weight is on me. And so I have more responsibility, more people depending on me… It’s a lot more stressful.” (40:49)

3. Faith as a Guide

• Both Danielle and Adam frequently reference relying on faith for direction and validation in their role changes and family decisions.
• Danielle emphasizes the peace she finds in returning to scripture and reminding herself of God’s purpose for her as a wife, mother, friend, and daughter.

Danielle: “But if I go back and say, like, but what does God call the wife? …That is our guidance.” (55:13)

• The power of “seasons”—accepting God’s timing and assignments even when they feel uncomfortable, uncertain, or mundane.

4. Marriage Dynamics & Growing Together

• They discuss how changes in work and home life have created friction—Danielle’s struggle with identity and control, Adam’s increased workload and sense of responsibility, and the importance of trust between them.

Adam: “It was definitely a friction point between us—feeling like you lost a little bit of control… And trusting me…that was a big friction point.” (54:35)

• Both hosts are open about the importance of communication, growing through trust issues, and loving each other through seasons of change.
• Danielle highlights the ongoing process of learning to “submit” and respect Adam’s role, which is a new experience for her after growing up without a male role model at home.

Danielle: “Learning how to submit to a husband, because I feel like I’ve always had to be the… And so even that’s a complete game changer.” (53:36)

5. Parental Priorities & The Value of Presence

• The Busbys are intentional in designing their work life for maximum family flexibility. They frequently reassess job opportunities to ensure both parents are available to their daughters.

Danielle: “We continuously have this conversation… about if something comes up or this opportunity… it just always comes back to: we both want to be needed and used within our house.” (63:37)

• Adam makes clear that quantity and quality of time with the kids is paramount, something he learned from times when his work kept him away for long periods.

Adam: “If you really, like, look at it and start spending time thinking about how much time you have left—like how many summers you have left before they’re gone—and spending every bit of those moments to ensure that they want to come back.” (01:22 / 61:29)

6. Practical Adjustments & Small Joys

• Danielle shares how she finds joy and meaning in simple moments: hiking, pressing flowers with the girls, creating small traditions, and “celebrating where you are.”
• The couple affirms the ordinary tasks—cooking, laundry, managing a busy household—are not always glamorous but are undeniably valuable.

Danielle: “I have to tell myself daily: How is doing this much laundry for the kingdom?” (55:46)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Identity & Purpose:
  • Danielle (36:50): “For someone who has had to work… to now lay under the lines of, like, I’m not even having to do, I’m just having to take care of. Which is so weird to me because that was never, in my mind, never perceived as enough.”
• On Trust & Faith:
  • Danielle (55:13): “But if I go back and say, like, but what does God call the wife? ...That is our guidance.”
• On Family Flexibility:
  • Danielle (63:37): “We continuously have this conversation… it just always comes back to: we both want to be needed and used within our house.”
• On Being Present:
  • Adam (01:22 / 61:29): “If you really... think about how much time you have left—like how many summers you have left before they’re gone—and spending every bit of those moments to ensure that they want to come back.”
• On Simplicity:
  • Danielle (13:39): “Where we got was still beautiful, and it was… fun to celebrate that and, you know, take pictures.”

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Important Segment Timestamps

• [02:11] – Family trip to Phoenix: Work/vacation balance, NASCAR event, and hiking memories
• [14:35] – Raising down-to-earth kids: outdoor play, simple joys
• [22:54 / 23:04] – Starting the deep discussion on changing roles since "OutDaughtered" and moving to a new community
• [31:12-36:50] – Danielle explores her struggle with not “feeling important enough” and the challenge of not working
• [40:49] – Adam’s feelings on increased work pressure and responsibility
• [53:36] – Danielle on learning to submit, new family dynamics, spiritual perspective on change
• [61:29] – Adam’s realization on work-life balance, parental presence, and intentional parenting
• [63:37] – Ongoing discussion about turning down traditional 9-to-5 jobs for family flexibility

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Conclusion

In this episode, Adam and Danielle peel back the curtain on their adjusted reality, sharing how hard and beautiful it is to embrace new roles within the family, marriage, and faith. Listeners—especially parents or anyone wrestling with transitions and questions of self-worth—will find solace and encouragement through their authentic storytelling, unvarnished struggles, and unwavering commitment to following God’s plan, even when it's tough. The message is clear: “Enough” is defined not by production or busyness, but by faithfulness to your calling—however ordinary or hidden it may feel.

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Listener Invitation:
Danielle wraps up by asking for feedback:
“I feel like it was good. Make sure to tell us if you relate to this or understand anything that I’ve said or have questions, whatever. We’d love to answer those in the comments.” (65:55)

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If you seek encouragement, raw honesty, or a real look at the evolving story behind “OutDaughtered,” this episode will resonate deeply—reminding you that when motherhood doesn’t feel like enough, God still says it is.

Transcript

[Podcast Host]

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[Danielle Busby]

I know that I don't want my life wasted away with not doing for the kingdom. Someone like me who says, this is not enough. I am not enough. I'm not doing enough. I'm not providing enough. But if I go back and saying, like, but what does God call the wife? What does God call the mother? What does God call me as a daughter? What does God call me as a friend? Like, that is our. That is our guidance.

[Adam Busby]

You know, if you really, like, look at it and start spending time thinking about how much time you have left, like how many summers you have left before they're gone, and spending every bit of those moments to ensure that they want to come back.

[Podcast Host]

This is More Than Reality podcast where we dive into all things faith, family, and marriage and share that there is so much more than the reality that you see on the surface. Welcome to More Than Reality with Adam and Danielle Busby.

[Danielle Busby]

Hey. Hey.

[Adam Busby]

What's up, guys? I think this is episode 75.

[Danielle Busby]

Oh, cool.

[Adam Busby]

I'm almost positive.

[Danielle Busby]

Oh, look, I actually had it up a while ago.

[Adam Busby]

Yes, it is episode 74. We talked about that we're going to be going to Phoenix and so we've done that. And so we took a little family trip to Phoenix, Arizona. It was.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah, it was lots of fun.

[Adam Busby]

It was super fun. We, we had the Good Rancher 250 at the racetrack. It was like a doubleheader with NASCAR. So it was a really cool weekend. I did the Grand Marshall stuff, so I got to start the race and I got so many praises for how well I did. They're like, man, I've never seen. I've never seen you that loud.

[Danielle Busby]

I even had you surprised. Me, too. But what was funny, it was. I remember the day before because, like, obviously, I knew you were going to do that, but I didn't realize, like, you were going to, like, scream it like that.

[Adam Busby]

You got to. You have to.

[Danielle Busby]

I know.

[Adam Busby]

You got to bring the energy.

[Danielle Busby]

I just don't think I've ever seen you, like, scream, like, with that much enthusiasm and just like, it's like, the

[Adam Busby]

only way you're supposed to do it.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah. But the day before, I remember you saying things like, I don't want. I don't want to lose my voice.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

Or like, whatever. And I was just like, what?

[Adam Busby]

Yeah. Because everybody kept asking me, are you. Are you going to practice it before you do it? And I'm like, no, I'm scared to practice it because I don't want to lose my voice. And then I go to do it for the real one, and then, like, my voice crack or my voice goes

[Danielle Busby]

out in the voice of.

[Adam Busby]

So, yeah, did not practice one time, and I just, like, went for it. It was funny.

[Danielle Busby]

It was good.

[Adam Busby]

We were down in the grid, and. And, you know, we're just waiting for. No one knows what a grid is where the. All the cars line up in pit lane before the race. And we're all the. You know, they do, like, the flyover and the national anthem, and all the drivers stand by their cars and stuff. So I'm up at the front, and they had three Corvettes up front, and I was gonna ride in one of them in the middle one. And so I'm just, like, standing behind these Corvettes. I'm with all, like, the broadcasters and stuff, and they're like. They have the headsets, and they're. They're waiting on the broadcast, like, when it's time to go, and then they announce me. And what was funny was, so the guy that was going to announce me, and then he's going to pass me the microphone. And it wasn't a wireless microphone or anything. And so it was on this little pigtail about three feet long.

[Danielle Busby]

I don't know what a pigtail is.

[Adam Busby]

Just like a little short extension cord, and it's connected to this box on his hip, and it was only three feet long. And so I told him before, I was like, look, you know, I'm going to try to do that as animated as possible. Let's see if we can put a clip on. But I was Going to try to do as animated as possible. So I'm going to, like, go, like, towards the camera whenever I do it. And he's like, let's practice it. And so it's, like, connected to his hip. And he's like. As I grab it, and I'm like, lean forward. And he's, like, throwing his hip out. He's like, okay, I think we got it. And so you're all producing your own. Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

As you're even telling this story with all your terminology that I don't even know what it means. So obviously, I feel like listeners don't know what that is either. I mean, typically, like, pigtail, and you're.

[Adam Busby]

I'm used to taking over and, like, directing stuff. So, yeah, I just took over and started directing.

[Danielle Busby]

It was funny because that. That morning we. I was with the girls, and I took them for, like, a little morning hike to, like, get out of, like, the little hotel resort that we were staying that. And they kept saying, we want to hike. We want to go on a hike. We want to go on a hike. And I was like, okay. I wasn't taking the girls up to the race that day. It was just a lot in a busy day. And so I stayed back with them, went on a hike and. But I kept trying to figure out, how do I watch this on my phone? It had so much difficulties. And I'm texting Adam. I'm texting, like, Ben and Coral. I'm, like, texting, like, everybody, but I know they're so busy and in the middle of things that I'm, like, trying to figure this out on my phone. It's like, okay, well, you need to log in for this, and you need to log in for this. And then I figured out that I could watch it, like, on the Fox Sports thing, but it, like, only allows you, like, four minutes or of. Of, like, free before you have to, like, sign in or whatever. And I'm like, I don't know. And it's like, we got to get back to the hotel in time. Like, I can't miss it. And so we did get back to the hotel in time, and, like, we watched it in the room, and, like, the girls were all, like, filming it. They were like, daddy was screaming. It was really funny, actually. Like, I think Hazel O'Reilly, like, just watched it in the car, like, yesterday, and they're like, why are you watching that again?

[Adam Busby]

Really? That's funny.

[Danielle Busby]

It's just funny. But, yeah, we had a good time. It was. Adam was busy a lot, which we Knew. We knew going into.

[Adam Busby]

On race weekends, like, I'm like, non stop.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah.

[Adam Busby]

We.

[Danielle Busby]

I knew going into it that he was going to be away a lot, which was fine, because I was like, well, at least I'm not going to be at home. And in our normal environment, we get to give. Make a little vacation spring break out of it.

[Adam Busby]

So it was super cool that we had the opportunity to, like, bring the whole family.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah.

[Adam Busby]

But then I'm also, like, torn a little bit, because for me, it's like work and family vacation stuff, and so you're. You're kind of trying to juggle both of them and then. But knowing, like, the priority at the time was all obligations. These. Especially these two days. And then after that, like, I'm free.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah.

[Adam Busby]

And so, you know, we went up to the track with the kids the day before, and they got to, like, walk around, go up into the suite, go and, like, see stuff. See cars going around the track.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah.

[Adam Busby]

And then for race day, Danielle stayed at the hotel with the kids, and. And then we were out at the track and just. It's just nonstop. I mean, we were running from spot to spot and golf carts taking us from here to there. But it was. It was a super cool story because one of our. One of our Team Penske drivers, Joseph Newgarden, won the race. And so we were in Team Penske's hospitality trailer before the race started, and the drivers come out. It's like a driver meeting. And so the drivers come out and they talk about the weekend, talk about the race, talk about strategy, and. And say a couple things, and then they head out to the grid where we were going to be going. And. But, you know, so each driver gets up and starts talking or whatever, and Joseph New Garden looked right at us at our table and, like, pointed to, like, the Good Rancher crew, and he's like, okay, guys, if I win this race, there better be stake in Victory Lane. And so we're like.

[Danielle Busby]

That was so fun to watch because it's.

[Adam Busby]

And he won the good rancher250. And so we're like, yeah, that makes total sense. And so, like, halfway through the race, we're like, dang, it looks like he may win this thing, you know, based off of the strategy and how things were going. And so we got to cooking, and we had this big platter, this big butcher board full of steaks that whenever he won the race, and then he came to Victory Lane, we had it all sliced up, and they. Him and the crew, and everybody started eating steak in victory lane. It was, I mean, you couldn't have written it any better. And so it was cool to have like one of our drivers actually win the race and.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah.

[Adam Busby]

And to really get to share that and because, you know, because we're a sponsor of the team, so they're gonna amp it up even more because like, oh, yeah, it's one of our sponsors. It's their meat and stuff like that. It would have been a little bit different if any other driver would have won it. So it was, it was super cool and special event.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah, for sure.

[Adam Busby]

And then after that, we went the, you know, the next day we went like on, you know, family hike. This episode is brought to you by Pocket Hose, the world's number one expandable hose. Okay. I've got to say, if you've ever fought with those old school garden hoses, you know how frustrating they can be. They kink up, twist around the spigot, and somehow always end up in a tangled mess. That's why I've been really impressed with the pocket hose Copperhead. The pocket Pivot actually swivels 360 degrees so that you get full water flow and can move around the yard without the hose constantly fighting you. And best part, when you're done watering, the hose actually shrinks back down to pocket size, which makes it super easy to carry and store. No more wrestling with a giant hose back into the holder. Plus, it's ultra lightweight, really durable and backed with a 10 year warranty, which is great when you got a busy house like ours and things get used a lot. The brand new Pocket hose Copperhead with Pocket Pivot is a total game changer.

[Danielle Busby]

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[Adam Busby]

Thank you Pocket host, for sponsoring this episode. We went and hung out. We hung out at the, we were at the JW area. Yeah. And so we did like they had a water park and lazy river and all that kind of stuff.

[Danielle Busby]

We did just like a chill, like hotel day, like resort day. Swam all the things and just chilled. It was fun. It was a great day.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

And then the next day, everybody else left and then we stayed one more night.

[Adam Busby]

We did two hikes that day. Didn't quite make it to the top of the mountain on the first hike. First Thing in the morning.

[Danielle Busby]

And, like, I know Adam was probably, like, itching like, I was he. Because he's like me and, like, me.

[Adam Busby]

And, like, two of the other girls were like, man, we're just, like, right there. Like, we're right.

[Danielle Busby]

Right there. Because you don't just go up there. You zigzag to go up. And so it takes longer. And so.

[Adam Busby]

So it was like, half of us were, like, itching to go up. Half of us.

[Danielle Busby]

But, yeah, I don't even believe the rest of the girls would have made it up to the top. You. You could have for sure. But that day, they wanted to do a challenging hike. And so we had six options for, like, the peak area that we were. And there were six, like, courses that are trails, like, we could have done. And they want to do the difficult one. And I was like, all right. They wanted to do, like, where you're climbing a boulder and a rock, like, those things. And I was like, all right, let's go. We're not going to make it far because one. It was already hotter. It was, like, 10, 12 degrees hotter that day.

[Adam Busby]

That was hotter day.

[Danielle Busby]

And. And it was a little bit later in the day that we started the hike. So we already were set differently from the day that I took them on a hike, but they had fun. And I was just like, you know, on the first hike that we went to, I gosh, I can't remember the name. I would have to look at my photos. But the lady there, I was just asking her questions, and she was like, you know, the goal is once you get halfway through your water, I mean, just be mindful of when you get halfway through your water. That's probably when you want to turn around. And so that was kind of like.

[Adam Busby]

But it's also easier to go back down.

[Danielle Busby]

Oh, yeah, for sure. But we also have six kids with us, and so it's not just like.

[Adam Busby]

So you can get a little past halfway in your water.

[Danielle Busby]

Mr. Adam. Wanting to just go to the top and hang off the cliff, you know, like, gosh, you drive me crazy.

[Adam Busby]

I didn't even bring a water bottle because we had.

[Danielle Busby]

I had four of them.

[Adam Busby]

No water.

[Danielle Busby]

But it was just a lot of. And I love that is what makes life so fun, is to just have that, like, adventure and experience things together like that. You know, it wasn't. We. We may not have gotten up all the way of the mountain and the peak at the top, but where we got it was still beautiful, and it was still unlike something that we would normally see. So no matter where we were doing it at and how far we got up, that was how far we made it. And it was so fun to celebrate that and, you know, take pictures. And I love the first hike I took with them because the girls love rocks, like in just plain and dirt and all that kind of stuff. And the first day on the way back, the girls there, it was a lot more. That hike was a little bit more trail. We were still going up a mountain, but it was definitely not as difficult. It was an more easier hike. So a lot flatter going up.

[Adam Busby]

That's like. That's like a testament to how normal and down to earth we raise our children. Because we've had like multiple people, like, you know, like.

[Danielle Busby]

Oh. Because they like to just play outside and find acorns.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah. Like, we've had. We've gone to, like, new friends houses here in Friendswood and stuff like that. And they're like, you know, it's the first time, like, the family, like our family is coming to, like, hang out. So they're like, you know, worried because they have older kids and they're like, worried that they have, like, enough things to, like, entertain the quints with and stuff like that. And then we get there and the girls just want to go, like, find acorn, like find pecans out in the

[Danielle Busby]

yard and acorns the next time.

[Adam Busby]

And so, like, our kids are perfectly fine just, like outdoors, looking for rocks, like, playing in the dirt and stuff like that. And so, like, people will tell us, like, after the fact. They're like, man, like, we thought your kids would be, like, you know, difficult and, like, hard to please and stuff like that.

[Danielle Busby]

And they're like, like, we need to do this.

[Adam Busby]

Like, the most down to earth kids ever. They just. They're perfectly content. Just go play in the dirt. You ever notice how the little things you use every single day actually shape how you feel?

[Danielle Busby]

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[Adam Busby]

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[Danielle Busby]

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[Adam Busby]

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[Danielle Busby]

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[Adam Busby]

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[Danielle Busby]

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[Adam Busby]

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[Danielle Busby]

But I loved on the way back, the girls were kind of like picking a flower and I had told him, I was like, oh my gosh. It's like, why don't we like make a little bouquet and we can dry the flowers and like keep that as our keepsake. And I think like, I still have them dried. They're getting pressed like within a book. And I did that at the hotel. I didn't have like all the things I needed, but I still have them here.

[Adam Busby]

Like she pressed them into the Book of Mormon,

[Danielle Busby]

which was weird because that was the one they had in the.

[Adam Busby]

They always have both the Gideon Bible and the Book of Mormon. I don't know which one I did

[Danielle Busby]

it in, but I just picked one. But I love that it's one. I love anything flower and florals. It's like my granny in me. It's like my favorite thing in the world. But so I have them drying and I think what I'm gonna do is just like kind of like put them in like some type of frame, but also so that you can make like, just like some acrylic type of whatever that gel stuff is that hardens that you can put them in something like that. But I think I'm just put them in a frame. But I love that because I'm like, that is like such a. A thing that I would use to like keepsake, but like could use it like on a shelf or something. And it's not just like just a photo. It's like, man, I remember picking those and the girls talking about all the different flowers. And so that made me really happy that we got to do something like that and do a little different tradition. So it's kind of like something that I feel like we can do anywhere that we go. Like what is some like the greenery or florals or like whatever's around there. And so that made me happy. But we had a lot of fun. Was super exhausted when we got back, but we got back on a Tuesday, home for a day. And then Adam left again to go Back to Dallas Arlington for the Arlington.

[Adam Busby]

Arlington Grand Prix. Yeah. Which was a super, another super cool race because they've never had the race there before. And it was like around Texas Ranger Stadium and also the Dallas Cowboys Stadium and like it was a super cool course. Super unique. They had like the owner of the Cowboys, owner of the Rangers, like, you know, and their cheer, you know, obviously the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders and like all them out there and you know, their mascots and I mean that. It was just, it brought like such a unique flavor to like IndyCar. And so it was just, it was a really fun weekend and it was like completely packed. The grandstands were. So it was a sold out crowd like even. Because like we're really close with like the executives at IndyCar and stuff like that. And they were telling us like, man, it's crazy because like a typical race weekend, like on the, on the last day you may have like 40,000 purchases or whatever from like they're the team, the, the IndyCar like official merchandise trailer. And then here in Arlington on, on Friday, which is like two days before the race, they had like over 280, 000 sales. Like there was, it was that busy.

[Danielle Busby]

So it ever been done in Texas or just not in Arlington?

[Adam Busby]

Arlington.

[Danielle Busby]

Okay. Yeah, but it's been done in Texas.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah, they've had races at like Texas Motor Speedway and stuff like that before.

[Danielle Busby]

Okay. Yeah, I can't remember I was saying something about that the other day. I was like, actually, I don't know what I'm talking about.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah, it was just, it was the first, it was the inaugural race for Arlington.

[Danielle Busby]

Cool.

[Adam Busby]

So it was a big learning experience for sure since it's like the first race ever there.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah, it's. So this is a, this is a very. It kind of goes on topic today because like we're approaching like a very busy season of just like, I think like work and just like, you know, birthday season for the girls, like is coming up and it's just a very. This is like a busy season for all of us. And kind of goes with today's topic with what's changed about us lately. When your kids start having breathing problems in your own home, that's when you realize how important air quality really is. A few years ago, we discovered a pretty serious mold issue in one of our homes. And the girls started having respiratory symptoms and coughing and congestion, just constantly irritated.

[Adam Busby]

It actually got bad enough that we had to move out of our house for a while just to make sure everyone was breathing safe air.

[Danielle Busby]

Ever since then, we've been extremely aware of air quality in our own home because there are a lot of things floating around in the air that you can't even see.

[Adam Busby]

That's why we started looking into Air

[Danielle Busby]

Doctor after adding Air Doctor in our home, one of the biggest things we've noticed was just peace of mind knowing the girls were breathing cleaner air. We also noticed fewer odors around the house and honestly less allergy irritations, which has been huge for our family.

[Adam Busby]

Air Doctor uses a powerful three stage filtration system that captures particles about a hundred times smaller than what typical air purifiers remove. It helps remove things like dust, pollen, mold spores and pet dander.

[Danielle Busby]

And it is whisper quiet so it's not loud like a lot of other purifiers. Plus it has an auto mode that monitors your air 247 and it even gives you filter change reminders so there's no guesswork.

[Adam Busby]

There's a reason Air Doctor won Newsweek's Reader's Choice Award for Best Air Purifier. And 98% of customers say their home's air feels cleaner, safer and healthier.

[Danielle Busby]

Head to airdoctorpro.com and use code more than to get up to 300 off today. Air Doctor comes with a 30 day money back guarantee plus a 3 year warranty and 84 value free. Get this exclusive podcast only offer [e-mail] that's a I R D O C T O R P R o dot com. Use promo code more.

[Adam Busby]

Thank you Air Doctor for sponsoring this episode.

[Danielle Busby]

I feel like a lot has changed.

[Adam Busby]

Changed since when filming Outdaughtered.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah, but I don't even know. I don't even think we have to go back that far because I feel

[Adam Busby]

like people like equate us now to like what they saw on TV and that's like where they see the change.

[Danielle Busby]

What do you mean?

[Adam Busby]

Because like that's like like the comments and things that you get on social media is like they, they like kind of have us in that box of and remember us by the people that they saw on tv and then they see us now on social media and stuff and they're like oh. And then they'll bring up like all these things that are just different about us now.

[Danielle Busby]

Okay, so let's talk about that. So what are things that you're seeing that people would say? Well I think it's weird that I see people say oh you're on social media. I'm glad I can keep up with it. I'm like Been on social media since before I was told, you know, but. Or it's kind of like, weird to me to think that, like, if I'm watching a show or like, into something, I'm probably going to go to Instagram and like, look up about the show or maybe the characters or the actresses or whatever. Yeah. So I'm like, that's kind of interesting. But I've been seeing a lot of that lately, actually, when I post whatever. I posted like a week, like the other day or something. I think there's been a lot more.

[Adam Busby]

It's funny, like, people that just now are finding social media. Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

And I'm like, really? But that's fine. Whatever. But I feel like. I feel like. Which I've kind of had a little bit of a conversation with you about this and it's sometimes hard to explain because, one, I am a woman, and so I think differently about things and like, the realness of something, the heart behind something, the emotions about something, and doesn't mean I'm emotional, but just like, I think in depth of, like, of the quality of that thought and what that feeling is and what that means and what it's going to be and all those things. And to Adam, as a man, I don't even think those questions process through. Through when something like that is changing, you know, But I think what's different now? And I guess I've seen a little bit of comments about this, you know, this world that I think a lot of people don't understand because you may know us from outdaughtered, or you may know us just from listening to this podcast. You may know us just from YouTube. It's a buzz world. Family videos you like. There's a lot of points of, like, where you may know us from, but I think what people don't really realize is, to me, what's the most different about today in the life we're living right now is, is the hardness it is for me to adjust to this. You know? You know what I'm saying? Like, I've kind of. I've tried to talk to you about this, and I'm not sure if you're, like, receiving it or, like, and understand it. Not receiving it, but you can't understand, like, or if you're understanding, like, what I'm talking about, because my whole life I have worked helping pay bills since I was babysitting at 10 years old, and like, always doing something to have, to give and support and to do and take care of myself and, and all the things. Okay. So it's very much a struggle for me today, and I've kind of been working, trying to work through this, is that, you know, and I think I've talked about this before. Like, being a mom was never just it for me. And I've always wanted to be a mom and have a big family. I never knew I could, but I never stopped working. I never stopped through all that. So ever since we had the quints and I had to quit work because I literally just physically could not, like, do much. And anyway, so that. But then that life turned into, like, I was working on, you know, in my mental. Mental head, I'm saying, like, what is. What am I looking forward to? What am I trying to achieve? And at that time, it was. My goal is to feed these babies. Like, that was. That was the job at the time, right? And I hate to say, like, parenting and being a mom and dad is a job, because it's not a job. It's a gift. And at that time, when I was pregnant, I'm like, I had to tell myself, like, my job because I needed to. My mind was wired like that. I have to do. I have to be doing something for something, because my whole life, that's what it was, right? And I realized that this season that we're in and moving from League City and changing pace of life and, you know, looking forward into, like, next year, like, homeschooling the quints, and Blake's still going to, like, public school, high school. But our work dynamic is so different. Our home life, to me, is so different. I feel like everything is so different. And I kind of want to talk about that today because I want it. I want people to kind of get, like, a deeper understanding of, like, how we view how we're raising our family and the decisions that we make to be where we are that are not always necessarily what I want to be doing. But when you feel called to do something, it's not always easy. But if you follow that guidance and you follow that voice of truth, I always know that in the end, it's going to be beautiful, even though it might be hard and messy in between. And so, you know, moving and stuff has been great. We really do love this community and love, you know, just, like, going to a new friend's house and the quints, like, just that expectation of someone saying, like, try to, like, make sure we had things for the girls to do and blah, blah, blah, but, like, all in all, like, they just want to hang out and, like, they just want to, like, be Outside and play and all those things, you know, like, that is like, the heart of, like, we just want to be who we are and enjoy company of others and. And grow in life together. And I love that you brought that up because it's just such a good example of, like, how we're trying to do life, you know. But, you know, I guess the question is kind of like, how do you foresee, like, different pace of life for you? Like, give your perspective on, like, you know, for a while. Let me kind of like, set you up so you kind of have. Because I kind of changed my questions that I was gonna ask you today.

[Adam Busby]

Gosh.

[Danielle Busby]

And talk to you today, but.

[Adam Busby]

Well, it wouldn't be any different than the morning of. On Sunday morning. We were. I was prepping to run and help with production on a, like a Fox News segment for good ranchers and the U. We were partnering with USO on race for the Race and some other stuff, but we had Fox News fly in and they wanted to do a segment with us. And so, like, I had to wake up at 3 o' clock in the morning, get up to the stadium, set up for this shoot. And so I'm like, prepping all this stuff up. And then like, Ben, our CEO, is like over there, like, kind of looking through notes or whatever, figuring out what he's going to talk about during the segment. And then like, two minutes before we are supposed to go live, he's like, hey, you're coming on with me. I'm like, okay. Like, no prep. Just like, okay, I'm gonna throw you some curveballs.

[Danielle Busby]

But I mean, it's like, to me, those things, like, anything, like, Adam is very talented and very gifted and good at all the work he does. So, like, when it comes to, you know, him talking about anything that he does, which half the time I don't know the language, which is fine. But he's very much a perfectionist when it comes to what he's going to produce and what he's going to be involved in. And he wants all the info and all the things, like, to make it what it needs to be. And when it comes to the podcast, when it comes to working with other clients and customers and contracts and whatever that he has, like, he's going to do it well. And I think that's something that people have definitely seen. And Adam doesn't give himself enough credit, like, by any means for the kind of work that he does. And I think, however, I think that something you could change is allowing other people to come in and help you because he's not good at that. Because I've been talking about this for a long time. But it's. It's fine. I think that, you know, if that's what he's gonna do, then let him do it the way he wants to do it. But I see things that could be improved and be more efficient in xyz. But I think I'm also can see that now because I'm not, like, I don't have, like, the shop anymore. I don't have my mindset on something else that I'm working on. And this next collection, this next market, this next photo shoot, this next. This. This next, like, all the next, you know, and so I'll tell him, like, there's just a struggle in the mix of right now is that, like, I'm not busy enough. And that is hard for me. But I know God has said slow down and, you know, it's just weird. So I'm trying to take life today where since I've been a kid, I've always had to produce. I've always had to produce. And I told you this not long ago. What I'm having to do now is, like, trust has always been, like, my biggest struggle and expectations, But I have to now trust Adam to do in me. Be the keeper, kind of. And though our whole life as married, as parents, I feel like we've done everything together as a team, and we're a great team. But in the work field, you know, when we were doing outdaughter, it was always together. And then when you stepped away from your career and like, we built. We were building up YouTube and, like, a lot of things were on you, but we were still in it together. And today, there's just a lot more that has come into your life that doesn't necessarily involve me, but I love that for you. I love that for you because it helps. It has made you better and not be so, like, stressed about the family. Family, family. And it's just made you. It's made you better to have something outside of just Busbee, right? And not that we don't still work together. Busby, Busby branded name and all the things that we do. But having those other things has brought you. It's brought you back to trusting your gifts and showing that you can do and you do enjoy, you know, and the fact now that you get to play and work so much together, it's never really work. But with me having to jump in this space where, like, I'm going back to What I had always wanted in the beginning of, of, you know, being. Being a young kid was like, I can't wait to be a mom one day. And then going back to. Right. Like, now I am. I hate to say this, but I am just a mom in a sense. Yes. We do podcasts, we do channels, we've got social media, we've got. I've got heart of her. That is true, but it's not. It's not. I'm not producing the financial stress income to support us that I've always felt the weight of having to do, even if. Even when we were doing things together, you know, And I know it's been harder for me to adjust to the slower life. And you are on the opposite now, where you're busy, you're busy, you're busy. And so we're. See, I'm seeing us kind of like, I don't. I don't know what the right word is. Like, kind of like navigate differently. Because even when I was working and doing all the things outside of Busby and like, say it was just Grace and Bee, it was just always like me, you know, I never thought of it the other side because you still had other things doing. But now I don't have those things. And so now I'm just like, here. And I feel like I'm like, what am I supposed to do today? You know, like in the car today, the girls are like, what are you doing today, mom? And I'm like, I don't do nothing. I wish I did, you know, but not really, because then I'd be really struggling. But to say all that, to say, like, for someone who has had to work and it work for their whole life, like literally my whole life, to have whatever you needed to have, not even what you wanted, but what you needed to have, you had to have, you had to do. Right. To now lay under the lines of, like, I'm not even having to do, I'm just having to take care of. Which is so weird to me because that was never in my mind, never perceived as enough. Right.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

Because I never was raised around that, you know, and so I know I'm

[Adam Busby]

talking a lot, and I mean, honestly. And you didn't really have that model to you very well.

[Danielle Busby]

Well. And I didn't. Wasn't raised with like a man in the house to even see that dynamic. You know, I was raised by my grandparents too, but they were still my grandparents.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

You know, a lot of things were taught and learned by them for sure. And. But I Wasn't raised. And I had this conversation just like with Ellen yesterday in the car on the way back in the car the other day. But anyway, so I just, I wanted to kind of like get your perspective on, like, let the listeners in on a little bit of taste of like, I struggle with life today as far as not feeling important enough, not feeling. And I know a lot of these are lies because it's like what the enemy wants to do is like bring us down and tear us apart and all the things. But I know this is what I need to be doing and I have peace about that. But I still find every day a struggle to not be like, what is that thing I'm working towards today? You know?

[Adam Busby]

Yeah. So what was your question?

[Danielle Busby]

For me, a lot. But I just hear, I just see Adam like listening to me talking like, and he's like, here she goes, she's going, she's going. She won't shut up. But my question to you is when we talk about the topic of like, how have we changed? How do you see where we are today and how it's, how it's different, how do you feel it's different for yourself, for our marriage, for just our day to day. Like, what's different?

[Adam Busby]

Yeah, I mean, I feel like it's all. I mean it's what's hard. It's like a night and day difference really. I mean, as far as like going from like me having my thing, you having your thing, and they both kind of like work together. And then also we have like, you know, our, like our stuff together. So we, we always like, even like with whenever you had grace and be like, yeah, you would handle running everything and managing the people and stuff, but I would still like come and help you with like photo shoots and like different like stuff for social media and stuff like that. And so like, you know, I was still like jumping in and helping you, but then, you know, now we kind of let all that stuff go. We moved away and you don't have like necessarily like day to day, like your thing and, and I know you've struggled with that a lot. And then on my end, I feel like a lot of things that like I've had on my side have kind of like picked up and, and I feel like a lot busier and, and maybe a lot of that is also just like feeling the pressure because you don't have like that other thing going on. It's just like feeling the pressure of like, okay, like more weight is on me. And so I have, I feel Like, I have, like, more responsibility, more people depending on me for, like, solely. And so obviously it's a. It's a lot more stressful. That's why, like, I feel like I do pour so much of my. My time and energy and effort into, like, what I do and take so much pride in what I do because I want to do it so well that, you know, that continues for years. And so, you know, it's just. It's been, you know, it's been a big change to go from just, you know, coming on as, you know, especially, like, in the stuff I do with good ranchers, from just like, helping here and there a couple days a month, you know, just, you know, helping with, like, website stuff and photography and, you know, projects here and there to like, now, like, being like, head of business development for good ranchers as a whole, you know, it. Just to see like, how that's grown and like, you know, how important that is for, like, our family. But for me, yeah, it's a lot. It's a lot more pressure. And then there. It creates also, like, a lot more tension. You know, we've had a lot of tension because I feel like, you know, sometimes you feel like you don't have your thing and like. Like what you do is like, quote unquote, like, not enough. Like, I'm not doing enough to help. And I know you feel that quite often because you're like, you know, like, I'm just. Especially whenever the kids are at school, you're like, I'm just home. Like. Like I'm not.

[Danielle Busby]

And it's weird because I love. I like being home. But it's like those mundane things like laundry and like. Like all those things, they're just. Those are just like the everyday task. They're not.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah, but you fought.

[Danielle Busby]

You.

[Adam Busby]

You haven't fully, like, kind of like, adopted that as a role mindset of, like, that's your. That's your role. Like, you, like, manage our house, which. Our house is very busy and there's a lot of moving parts and there's a lot to do in our house. And. But like, you have that disconnect where, like, that's. That's not like, you don't want to say, like, that's a job or whatever or that's not in a sense, like, benefiting the family, like, in a financial sense. And so it's like it. It like, it brings less value to, like, pay the bills and stuff like that. Like, that's not like. But. But that does because it's like it takes load off of me. So, like, I'm not having to like, worry about things like that. Like, you know, things at home are like, fine or, you know, sometimes like, I feel. I feel like I, you know, whenever I'm having to like, lock myself in my office to like, finish projects and stuff like that, like, I feel like, bad about having to just sit in my office and work while family's here and kids are here. But, you know, like, yeah, I do go away and like, work at the main offices or working for another client or. Or I'm back home. But all of those things are work. And I have to think about it as like, yeah, like any other person would be like, at a 9 to 5 job or something like that, where, you know, whenever they're gone, they're in work mode. They're in work mode and not me. I'm just like, free to like, just step out and do whatever I want. Like. And so it's just. It's a hard mindset to be in. Especially whenever you work from home.

[Danielle Busby]

Do you feel like it's. Do you feel. So like, to me, I. I work better under pressure and when I have too much to do, do you. And are you the opposite of that or do you feel like you're performing better when you're stressed or busier or more on your plate?

[Adam Busby]

I usually, like, I work better under stress. I feel like I get more accomplished under stress because, like, if I have a deadline to hit or whatever, like, you know, most days, if, like, there's not necessarily like a deadline this week, I may like, put some stuff off or like, you know, go spend a little bit more time to myself for like, certain things and like, kind of will allow myself to turn work mode off. But if there's something like that's pressing or whatever, like, I'll work till 2, 3 in the morning if I need to, and like, I'll just like stay locked in. And so I feel like I work better like, under, under the gun and like, knowing that, like, okay, I have to hit this. I have to do this. So.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah, and I don't. I don't have anything against like, working parents, both husband and wife. And that's been our whole marriage. We've both had careers, we both worked with our kids and, you know, all that until, I would say until basically now, I'm kind of like more like this quote unquote, stay at home, mom. And I'm not by any means complaining about that because I actually feel very privileged and love the fact that I am doing that. It's just. But it doesn't mean that it's normal for me, you know, And I have not had a necessarily like.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah, it's just like a transition that you have to like get used to. But it hasn't been normal to you?

[Danielle Busby]

No, it hasn't been normal to me. And really us. And I think, you know, in some ways it's good, it's good for our marriage that we have a little bit of like this work where it's more traditional, like the man works and the husband, the wife stays home and like, you know, but if, if I look back to like biblical and like all. And that's what I keep falling back on right now is that like I feel like I'm living like an old fashioned life, like, like I'm my grandma, you know, and it bothers me because like I've never been that I've never been like just a stay at home mom, you know?

[Adam Busby]

Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

And so I don't know if it's a stigma, if it's just this, you know, like, thing that's just like rest rested on me my whole life is that you have to work. And I struggle with accepting that I don't have to.

[Adam Busby]

I mean, I feel like you have more problems and more struggle with it than probably most people would have as far as like the learning curve and the, the mindset shift than like a lot of other people.

[Danielle Busby]

Like, but people probably go, you're crazy because you have six kids. Of course, of course that's enough, you

[Adam Busby]

know, But I mean, even from like, I mean early, early, early teenagers years, like you were, you were working and babysitting and helping give money to your mom to pay bills and stuff. So like you were like from, I mean, as early as you could babysit. I mean, like what, what age? Like 13, 12. No, I was like earlier.

[Danielle Busby]

Great. I was like the quints right now.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

We would babysit together, me and my sisters.

[Adam Busby]

Because it's so like from the age that you are the quince, like you are literally contributing to, like contributing financially to your family and to just make ends meet and make things work. And so like that's been ingrained in you your entire life. And then to go now like this new season of life where. Oh, I don't like, I'm, I don't necessarily have to do that. And now it's like all coming back and like it's a struggle. Yeah. Because you feel like. Like what? Like that's all I know.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah.

[Adam Busby]

That's what I'm supposed to be doing.

[Danielle Busby]

And I find that in my. In my mindset is that I. Well, one, I love to, like, make things happen and come to life. And, like. Like, if there's an idea, I'm like, oh, let's see what this would be. Like, oh, how can I make that? How can I make that a business? What would I do with that? Can I do this? Can I do that? Like, I am constantly thinking about that

[Adam Busby]

because I'm like, a lot of times

[Danielle Busby]

it's freaking annoying because I'm constantly trying to find something.

[Adam Busby]

Can you just be content with, like, yeah. Managing the house and, like, what your role is right now? Like, why are you constantly looking for your next thing? Like, this is your thing right now. And. And I feel like, okay, but then, like, you'll. You will, like, push stuff off that, like, you should probably be handling because you're, like. You're trying to find that, like, next thing to, like, contribute or whatever. I'm like, no, like, freaking put the brakes on and.

[Danielle Busby]

Well, and then. Not to mention that I feel like I'm, like, in midlife crisis stage age.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

Going through all the, like, physical things and stuff, too. And so I just feel like this. You know, 40s are. To me, 40s are. Are gonna be great. They're gonna be great guys. Because I feel like as we get older, we just. We just get more wiser in the decisions that we have to make and the people you hang around, the yeses and the no's. And so I feel like we've just done so much better at those. As those things. But what I feel like I struggle with as I'm getting older and being in this place is, like, not having, like, we've always had people around us. Yes, we still have a community and people around us, but I feel like the difference between us and what life is different today. What we're just talking about is that I'm not having that, like, day to day, like, Adam, yada, yada, yada, yada. And, like, opinions or, like, conversations about, even today, laundry or, like, whatever that is. Like, these are real. These are real struggles that I think moms have at home when it comes to their day is filled with cleaning a house and doing clothes and making food. Like, that is not always fun, you know, and when it's not our gifts and we don't feel like we're good at it, I don't feel like I'm a good cook. It's hard, you know, and so. But therefore goes to say is that, like, in those moments, whenever we are placed in situations that we're not always good at, we're not always comfortable in, but we know we need to be there. To me, it pulls me closer to God and saying, like, you've brought me here, like, now, now, now. What do you want me to do? Like, guide me through this, Change my attitude. Help me. Help me with grace. Like, help me see this in the way that you see this. Help me love this person the way that you. This person. Help me serve this person the way that you want me to serve these people, you know? And so, like, all those things are just becoming so different because, yes, the house. What does it say on the little note downstairs? Like, but the. This house is. Is our church. You know, like, we are raising six girls. And, you know, I just. The slower you slow down, the more that you really think about, like. Or me. I guess I've been thinking more about life and just, like, you know, only have, like, almost three years. The girls yesterday said, we have nine weeks of school left, and I'm like, holy cow. Nine weeks of fifth grade, you're gonna be in middle school. That means three more years with Blake in our house, basically, before she goes. So it's just, like, so many things. Like, life is going by so fast, and I am so thankful that I'm here now to be able to slow down and just, like, really embrace and really see that. Like, the girls, even about 10 times yesterday, I'm just thinking, I wish I had a mom that did that with me, or I wish I had a mom that felt that for me. I wish I had a mom that cared about that for stupid things around the. Like, just of the day of the weekend, you know, and it's those little things that even though I might struggle with accepting, like, the. The to do list today, how different it is and unsatisfying it might be to my needs, it might be saddest it. It is what God wants me to do, and it's satisfying him, and that is, like, that should be enough, you know, and raising the kids and being the support system and learning, like, still, even after 20 years of marriage, learning how to submit to a husband, because I feel like I've always had to be the. And so even that's a complete game changer. And so,

[Adam Busby]

yeah, that was a lot

[Danielle Busby]

of changes that, like, I. I am struggling, and I don't always know how to voice it or. Or say all those things, but yet two. As you go and ex have to accept this wife in her 40s, changing and all the things emotional and physical and all the things you too have to say, okay, life is different. How must I be adapting and changing and receiving and loving and submitting like all the things too, you know?

[Adam Busby]

Yeah, I mean that's, that's what was so difficult because like as you, your role has changed and stepped back. Like you're wanting to control like what I do and like and me feeling like, and, and trusting of what like I'm out doing and stuff, like that is enough and stuff. And that's what, that's like what was a big friction point as well of worrying about because knowing how much you like to control things and then you kind of in a sense like lost a little bit of control with like on the financial side and stuff like that and then. And trusting me and you have issues with that trust issues and like control, like letting go of control and stuff like that. And so, you know, that was definitely a friction point between us and like feeling like you don't like you, like it's hard for you to let go and just to trust.

[Danielle Busby]

Well, I feel like what happens in this moment of like all these changes is that I don't feel important. I don't feel like.

[Adam Busby]

But then because you feel like that about yourself, you take it out on me.

[Danielle Busby]

So therefore, Therefore I think what I'm not going to tell you what to do, but therefore there needs to be. Accepting that your wife is having a hard time with blah. So therefore you must love and do blah. I'm trying not to start identify guys, but I, I just feel like I, I think a lot of people can relate to what I am feeling and people have probably related to how I'm feeling since they first became, you know, parents or been been struggling this their whole parent. I don't know. But I know that I don't want my life wasted away with not doing for the kingdom. And that's something that I have wrestled with and had been telling him, if this isn't for the kingdom, then what are we doing? Like why, like what's, what's the purpose of that? You know? And so like I'm still trying to identify in this, this new path of career just being home, how is. And, but the thing is, I know like this is what God wants for us and like this is for the kingdom, raising those girls and yada yada, yada. But I have to tell myself daily how is doing this much laundry for the kingdom, you know, I mean, it's just silly things like that. But I'M just keep being reminded that whenever we really seek God's word and you accept that as truth, your life will be so much better. And it may have taken ups and downs. It may have been like, not pretty, it may have been hard. You've may have had lots of tears or. But if you continuously dive into the Word, which is truth, living truth, you will find peace within that. However, you also have to be willing to allow yourself to change. And in some aspect, it might be hard for the spouse to receive a change. But if you say and if you continue to communicate, this is for the kingdom. This is what God's called me to. This is what scripture says. I feel like that right there is so solidifying to someone like me who says, this is not enough. I am not enough. I'm not doing enough, I'm not providing enough. But if I go back and saying, like, but what does God call the wife? What does God call the mother? What does God call me as a daughter? What does God call me as a friend? Like. Like, that is our. That is our guidance, you know, and as speaking that, allowing and also telling myself that too. So know that I don't have this figured out, but I'm sharing with in the midst of what has been changing between the dynamics of our household. And I feel like it's hard. It's. It's a lot. It's hard. And though I've always been a mom and I feel like we're great, we're both great parents, we're both great dad, and, you know, even on my worst days, I know I'm a better mom than I was ever mom. Does that make sense? You know, and so I am so very fortunate that I get this gift in this, you know, life to be able to do this with six daughters and, you know, we are. I want to just do my best to be able to raise little humans that will always want to come back home. And that's maybe that's the. Maybe that's my to do when I need to just keep telling myself daily, which it's like I feel that I know that. But like, as I struggle with, like, what's my next thing and what is that? Like, I'm just gonna keep telling myself that is my thing, that is what I need to do and whatever falls in between work and what all the things gardening, maybe. I don't know, just looking for something else to do. Anyways, so I. I feel like I was just venting a lot and I totally went off our, like, schedule of conversation. Topics and talk today. But I don't know, is there anything else that you want to share from, like, your perspective or, like, for a husband or a dad who might be experiencing this level of change and pace or how does a dad feel whenever he wants to be, you know, at home with his kids but is called to work? Xyz. Because I don't. Because that is what happened back, you know, 15 years ago, 17 years ago, you were so worked out that you were.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah.

[Danielle Busby]

Getting depressed because you weren't having family.

[Adam Busby]

Yeah, like, I don't have a chance to see him. Never had a chance to, like, kind of take care. And it was just weird because, like, you didn't really see that on TV.

[Danielle Busby]

No, not all.

[Adam Busby]

Because, you know, they just kind of shot around that and film your shot, like, on the weekends or just like, whenever I was there. And so you never really saw that. That season of life for us whenever. Yeah, I was, like, out of town working these projects. Like, I could go. I feel like I would go, like, weeks and sometimes even months without, like, barely even seeing the kids because, like, I'm off working on, like, turnarounds or. I mean, I'm gone before the sun's up and, you know, I'm just getting home maybe just a few minutes before they're going to bed. If not, they're already in bed. Like, that affected me so much and never really wanting. That's why I stepped away from that. Like, something's got to give and it's. It's going to be the thing that keeps me away from my kids and my family the most. And so, like, I just walked away. But it's really like finding. Finding that balance and, like, finding, you know. Yeah, whenever you're off, you're off and, like, you know, pour into your kids and, like, cut up with your kids and spend time with your kids. Like, it's all about, you know, real conversations, face to face quantity and the amount of time that you can spend with them while they're there. Because, you know, if you really, like, look at it and start spending time thinking about how much time you have left, like, how many summers you have left before they're gone, and spending every bit of those moments to ensure that they want to come back and, like, want to spend, you know, those Christmases and those, you know, those moments back home with you instead of, like, resenting you for either always being gone or always, you know, just dedicated and. And glued to your work. Like, I never wanted that. And so, you know, I'm glad That I do have the opportunities to be able to like kind of have. Still make that decision, have balance in both worlds and still like can like take off and do things with them and stuff like so.

[Danielle Busby]

Which you could also talk about that for a quick minute. I know we've been going long, but like we've also had lots of opportunities for Adam to be more of a real 9 to 5, like career jobs. But we keep that mindful. We continuously have this conversation probably like every six months about if something comes up or like this opportunity. And it's like, I just don't think that we need to give up the flexibility that we can provide to our six kids. If you go into that life pace, you won't have that option. You'll be tied to someone else's schedule. And right now, like we need to maintain available for what the kids need. And we've been doing that almost since we've, you know, I guess since they've been three, when you've completely left your career, three or four, however. But that has not, not been on the plate. But there is lots of opportunities where it has been, hey, should I take this? Should I do this? And it's like we keep going back to, what would that change for our family? How would it change for the kids? What would that look like? And it just always come back to, we both want to be needed and used within our house and so we don't want the weight to fall on one or the other. And you know, but that's right now,

[Adam Busby]

like this, the scale is like tipped a little bit that way. But still we have a lot more freedom than.

[Danielle Busby]

Yeah, you still have freedom around it and just scheduling and stuff like that. But yeah, yeah, so a lot's changed within just like the little bits of, you know, even since we've started this podcast and everything, like just trying to share a little bit more of the heart to heart right here today. Don't know why I just was on the topic conversation of today and kind of went off. Anyways, I feel like it was good. Make sure to tell us if you relate to this or understand anything that I've said or have questions, whatever. We'd love to answer those in the comments below. So.

[Adam Busby]

Yep. Thank you guys for tuning in to episode 75. Yeah, more than reality podcast.

[Danielle Busby]

Woohoo. 75.

[Adam Busby]

We'll see you in the next one.

[Danielle Busby]

Peace out.

[Adam Busby]

All right, we love you guys.

[Danielle Busby]

La.