Move It or Lose It | Episode 139 Part 01 | Ralph Cortese: Hope in Recovery

Summary

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Move It or Lose It | Episode 139 Part 01 | Ralph Cortese: Hope in Recovery

Host: Kathy Chester
Guest: Ralph Cortese
Date: October 22, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode focuses on hope and resilience in the face of stroke recovery as host Kathy Chester welcomes Ralph Cortese. Ralph shares his personal journey of surviving a life-altering stroke, navigating the gaps in rehabilitation, the importance of community, and how advocacy became central to his ongoing mission. The conversation naturally highlights the challenges, the lessons, and the victories—big and small—in recovery from brain attacks (such as strokes), the critical value of support groups, and creating resources for fellow survivors. Ralph's story is one of confronting immense adversity with gratitude and determination, and he offers insight and encouragement to listeners dealing with similar challenges.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Ralph’s Life Before Stroke and the Event (02:10–07:15)

• 2015—The Stroke: Ralph was thriving as a contractor, physically active and feeling well before suddenly being struck by a severe stroke.
• Misdiagnosis & Delayed Care: On realizing he couldn't walk or see out of one eye, Ralph called an ambulance. The responding EMTs dismissed his symptoms and left, saying, "No, you’ve already had your strokes." (04:49)
  • Quote: “Who the hell wants to go to hospital? No, I don’t want to go. Do I have to? Ready for this? He said, 'No, you’ve already had your strokes.' And he left.” – Ralph (04:49)
• Eventual Hospitalization: After crawling outside to meet a second ambulance, Ralph finally received care and a proper diagnosis.

Surviving and Reframing After Health Crises (07:15–08:33)

• Multiple Health Events: Ralph recounts surviving severe cardiac events, including dying on the table three times (06:33), and his wife’s three heart attacks.
• Choosing Gratitude: Despite loss and hardship, Ralph finds gratitude for the years and adventures he shared with his wife.
  • Quote: “We did have those six years. We did have 25 years together, which was awesome.” – Ralph (08:25)
  • Kathy: "What a great way to look at it, Ralph…you really display gratitude in a very beautiful way." (08:33)

Gaps & Frustrations in Stroke Recovery (11:10–15:17)

• Lackluster Rehab: Ralph discusses poor follow-up therapy and being shuffled through perfunctory care after moving to Colorado Springs.
• Systemic Gaps: “We're not told a whole lot of stuff…this is going to be the hardest thing you’ve ever done in your life. You’re going to have mental health issues. Your physical therapy is done at six months or a year. And they say it’s good as it’s going to get.” – Ralph (13:22)
• The Power of Specialized Therapy: Discovering neurophysical therapy and specialized devices (AFOs) dramatically improved his mobility after years of stagnation (14:31–15:17).
  • Memorable Moment: Ralph describes crying with joy the first time he could run again on a treadmill, years after his stroke. (14:54)

Mental Health, Motivation, and Setting Tangible Goals (15:19–19:45)

• Debunking Recovery Myths: Kathy and Ralph push back on the common myth that “whatever you are after six months, you are,” illustrating real progress is possible long after acute rehab ends.
• The Importance of a ‘Why’: Ralph credits a photo of his grandchildren with inspiring him through his darkest days.
  • Quote: “I was in some dark moments twice during early recovery, and I looked up on a wall and I saw the picture of my grandchildren and I said, nah, no more…what’s your why?” – Ralph (17:02; 17:56)
• Small Victories Matter: Both emphasize breaking down overwhelming tasks into tangible, achievable goals and celebrating every gain.

Learning to Advocate and Finding Community (19:26–21:21)

• From Patient to Advocate: Ralph’s self-advocacy began with voicing what he wanted in therapy, which yielded practical solutions (e.g., a therapist bringing in a ladder so he could relearn skills as a contractor, 26:12–26:35).
• Support Groups as Lifelines: Real connections with fellow survivors and caregivers led to a strong sense of community and mutual growth.
  • “Every victory was celebrated with all of us…support groups are amazing.” – Ralph (20:30; 21:03)
• Caregiver Awareness: Both discuss overlooked needs of caregivers and importance of their support.

Building Resources: Stroke Warrior Radio (27:16–32:16)

• Origin Story: The idea for Stroke Warrior Radio was sparked at a stroke awareness event, where Ralph’s voice was singled out as “radio-worthy” (27:40–27:44).
• Mission and Reach: The platform was built to fill information and support gaps, sharing survivor and therapist voices, resources, and new research in accessible formats.
  • “I wanted to communicate all the things they didn’t tell me.” – Ralph (28:12)
• Expanding Influence: Stroke Warrior Radio now broadcasts worldwide, is expanding to YouTube and live panels, and covers practical topics such as adaptive devices, nutrition, and therapy.
  • Practical Example: “I didn’t find out about an AFO until seven years. Nobody told me, I ever suggested, once I had that my life changed.” (31:06)

Coping with Cognitive and Emotional Aftereffects (36:11–39:13)

• Ongoing Cognitive Challenges: Ralph is candid about memory lapses and missed appointments—common post-stroke struggles.
  • “That’s one of the things we still go through...sometimes I’m terrible at following up. I miss appointments, you know, those kind of things. Because of the cognitive issues.” (36:11)
• Seeking and Sharing Knowledge: Both stress the need to spread practical knowledge—about therapies, insurance, adaptive equipment, and more—so others aren’t left in the dark.

Embracing Imperfections, Visibility, and Self-Assertion (41:18–43:02)

• Owning Side-Effects: Ralph addresses involuntary movements (possibly from medication), and choosing to be visible rather than embarrassed.
  • “There’s something that developed because of a bad diagnosis, but it’s what I’ve got…I just do what I do, and if it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work. Maybe it’ll work next time.” (42:24; 42:55)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On surviving adversity:
  “I have to make a choice to be a survivor or a warrior.” – Ralph (11:10)
• Reflecting on mental health:
  “We're not told a whole lot of stuff…your physical therapy is done at six months or a year. And they say it’s good as it’s going to get.” – Ralph (13:22)
• On small triumphs:
  “I never thought I’d run again…and after six and a half to seven years, that’s six months with a neurophysical therapist, I got an AFO, I got the water treadmill—seven years, I was off my cane walker.” – Ralph (15:10–15:17)
• The big motivator:
  “That was what triggered me to start doing things that I always did. No matter how bad it looked, I kept doing it till it became normal.” – Ralph (17:02)
• On advocacy and community:
  “Once I found other survivors…they helped me inspire myself. We became this family, this community.” – Ralph (20:01; 20:24)
• On the power of asking:
  “The only dumb question is the one you don’t ask.” – Ralph (26:00)
• Encouraging listeners:
  “I want to be the search engine for stroke and TBI survivors.” – Ralph (35:48)

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Timestamps of Key Segments

• [02:10] – Ralph’s pre-stroke life; the sudden onset of stroke
• [04:49] – The dismissive EMT and delayed care
• [06:33] – Previous cardiac events; close calls
• [08:25] – Grieving, gratitude, and reframing loss
• [13:22] – Systemic therapy challenges and incomplete recovery advice
• [14:54] – Emotional breakthrough on the treadmill
• [17:02] – The ‘why’ that keeps Ralph going—his grandchildren
• [20:01] – Support group stories; building survivor communities
• [27:16] – How Stroke Warrior Radio began
• [31:06] – Discovering adaptive devices
• [36:11] – Coping with cognitive deficits in daily life
• [42:24] – Embracing visibility with post-stroke changes

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Takeaways

• There is life and progress after stroke—sometimes long after traditional therapy ends.
• Advocacy for your own needs can fundamentally change the trajectory of recovery.
• Community, sharing, and support groups are critical—no one thrives alone.
• Asking questions and seeking information, even “weird questions,” fills vital gaps left by mainstream care.
• Embracing limitations or quirks post-stroke is part of self-acceptance and can empower others to do the same.

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This episode is rich in hope, practical support, and the value of resilience and peer connection in the recovery process. Ralph’s vulnerability and passion are sure to inspire anyone facing or supporting a loved one through neurological recovery.

Transcript

[A]

Foreign. Your host, Kathy Chester, and welcome to the Move it or Lose it podcast, a podcast about all things that move the mind, body, and soul. The Move it or Lose it podcast is for information, awareness, and inspirational purposes only. I am not a doctor, and I don't even Play 1 on TV, so please consult your doctor before making any medical decisions. The views expressed by advertisers, guests, or contributors are their opinions and not necessarily the views of the Move it or Lose it podcast. Hello. Welcome to another day of Move it or Lose It. So we know what that means. If we're not moving, we are losing our ability to move, to walk, and we don't want that because we don't want atrophy or anything like that. So my guest today is Ralph Court. He's so the American, because it's not Italian and we're both Italian, So. Ralph, I loved when I got to be on your podcast. It truly was an honor, and I'm so grateful to have you on mine. So welcome, welcome, welcome.

[B]

I'm grateful for you having me as well. And I need to mention to you that your. Your. The interview we did together is in the top five of. On our YouTube channel.

[A]

Yeah. All right. I'm gonna put that. And put that on my. On my YouTube. I'll tell my editor to, like, my therapy dog is like, I hear you. She can, but she wants to be a part of everything, so. Don't you. Yes, I know. All right. There she is. Okay. She's on every podcast, every video. She feels the need to be a part of it. So your story just really kept. And I was telling you, I'm coming into the podcast room, and I've got this stack of papers that I'm reading, I'm really into, and then they all go flying. I'm like, of course that happens because it's the podcast time. So. But we always. It'll always be fun. And I had a great time with you doing it last time, so I have no doubt it'll be the same.

[B]

So.

[A]

So. So tell me about. Let's go backwards again before we go forward. So tell me about your journey, and then we'll talk about you and your wife and. And all of that stuff. But I want to know about. And how you got started with this. Tell me the feeling, the emotions. It's 2015. Anything before that that you had any, like, inclination or any kind of, like, stroke issues or weird stuff happening?

[B]

You know, that. That was. That was actually a good time for me. I was a contractor. I had a huge Contract remodeling all the cabins and a summer camp.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I had a great week. The week of my stroke, I was in great shape. I was £200. I was physically doing very well. I mean, and I did. I think I did three porches and two roofs that week.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, you were in great shape then.

[B]

Yeah. So on Friday night, I came home and I did my usual. Sit down and have my iced tea and watch the news. Fell asleep. And when I got up, it was terrible. I couldn't walk. My head was killing me. I dragged myself to. I didn't know what was going on. I figured I worked too hard that.

[A]

Week, which obviously could have felt, you know.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You're in the sun a lot.

[B]

Pardon me?

[A]

You're in the sun. It's hot.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, it was great.

[A]

You got this great Italian fan.

[B]

Yeah. And the Poconos. It was an awesome time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I was in great place, personally or emotionally, but I got hit with this. I didn't know what the heck was happening. So I took some ibuprofen and went to bed. I figured, you know, I'll feel better in the morning.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, my left side was just completely gone, like, really?

[A]

That's when you went to sleep.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, I know, right?

[A]

I know. I would have done the same thing. You're the oldest, though.

[B]

It's another thing about raising awareness. I had no idea I was having a stroke. I woke up the next morning, couldn't walk. I could barely see out of my left eye. So I called an ambulance. They came out and said. Asked me if I needed to go to hospital, and I said, who the hell wants to go to hospital? No, I don't want to go. Do I have to? Ready for this? He said, no, you've already had your strokes. And he left.

[A]

You're kidding me.

[B]

No, I'm not. I'm not. I swear to you.

[A]

Oh, goodness. I don't think I can hear any more stuff about the medical community right now.

[B]

Oh, yeah, exactly. And that. That's part of the journey, too, for both of us, I'm sure.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[B]

But I. I called an ambulance a couple hours later, and.

[A]

So can I have a different one? Don't put me with the same guy, please.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, exactly. But they. They came out. I crawled around. I had to crawl at the time, but I crawled on my hands and knees and got a backpack. I went outside, locked my door, and sat on the front stoop waiting for the ambulance. And I said, what are you doing out here? I Said, we're going to hospital, I'm having a stroke. And they took me. They were pretty angry about the previous ambulance guys.

[A]

I'm sorry.

[B]

I know they got discipline that day.

[A]

Yeah. But hopefully a little bit more.

[B]

Yeah. I pretty sure they got fired.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But, you know, I got in the hospital half hour away in Scranton, Pennsylvania.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And they started calling all these codes and all this other stuff. I didn't know what the heck was going on.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

And they finally told me if I had a stroke. So I was, I guess, in intensive care two days. Okay, maybe three. I don't remember much until my daughter came from Arizona to be with me.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Luckily.

[A]

Anybody in your family ever had one before?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay. So this was all new. You were like, what is this?

[B]

Yeah, it was. We. There's heart issues in my family, but.

[A]

Right.

[B]

As a matter of fact, even myself, I have ventricular attack. Cardiac in 2001.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Died. Died on the table three times a light, you know, so it was. It was.

[A]

Were you going to the light or.

[B]

Yeah, I was okay until I heard. Heard my wife and doctor hollering, ralph, come back, come back.

[A]

Get back, get back. I got chores for you. Get back. I got Honey duplex.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

It's not done.

[B]

I. I got through that. I mean, that was nine emergency room visits.

[A]

Wow. Wow.

[B]

Recapture ablations. I think they wound up after all three. Killing 268 points in my heart. But, you know, I got over that. And then the stroke hit me and it's like.

[A]

I love the way you're talking. Like, it's no big deal. Like, got done with that. That was. That was done. Like, these would put people in, like, a pretty, like, terrified state. You're like, got done with that. Now we're moving on.

[B]

Yeah. Well, and it wound up being pretty good after that because I had a new lease on life. You know, it's that whole thing of, yeah, here I am again. You know, and my wife and I at the time wound up traveling country for six years because she had heart issues.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Prior. So we wound up traveling the country for six years.

[A]

She was a child nurse. Good for you.

[B]

She always said it was the best time of our life.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, because she had had. How many heart attacks did she end up having?

[B]

Her first one was in 96, and she wound up with two more.

[A]

You guys were like frequent flyers at the hospital.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They're like, hey, guys, how are you?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And eventually, weird stuff for you here.

[B]

Yeah. She actually wound up passing away in 2019.

[A]

I'm so sorry. Wow.

[B]

It was. But we did have those six years. We did have 25 years together, which was awesome.

[A]

Yeah. What a great way to look at it, Ralph. I mean, what a great way where so many could be, you know, really bitter about the things that you've gone through. And what a great way to look at it that we had these six years that were beautiful. And what a great way to hold on to. You know, the Gratitude journal is all big now and it's like I've been doing that for 30 years, but you know, right now with, with our younger cries, like gratitude, gratitude. But you really had that long before the gratitude journal was a thing. So you had, you have gratitude. Really, truly, you, you really display that in a, in a very beautiful way. I cannot tell you how excited I am to announce my partnership with foot Scientific. Their Elevate 360 drop foot solution is amazing. It's lightweight, it has customized sizing, which is amazing. I've been in braces where they are much too big and bulky. This one has memory foam. It's comfortable. I have walked my dog, I have run with it already. I have danced in it. And it is amazing. It has stainless steel anchors which you can wear them in any shoe you want to. But to be able to have them connect to your laces so that you can lift the foot so that the drop foot isn't so bad and know that they're safe in there is so incredible. To be able to have this, to be able to have it on your ankle and then attach it to a tennis shoe, to attach it to a heel actually, or a sandal is absolutely amazing. I cannot tell you how excited I am to be a part and partner up with Foot Scientific. They are truly here to meet our needs. So I encourage you to go on to the [e-mail] check them out and of course use my discount code. It is Ms. Disrupted, all caps 30 and you'll get $30 off your pair. And also don't forget 60 day guarantee. If it doesn't work for you, then you can return it. And that is why I love But Scientific. They are a company that truly cares about our needs. So don't forget, check them out. I love my partnership with them. Have a great day.

[B]

I kind of had no choice. And that's a lot of us that have a stroke or anything, any kind of brain attack. So we have to make a choice to be a survivor or a warrior.

[A]

You bet.

[B]

I finally, you know, in the beginning, the Stroke recovery was very, I'm going to say poor. My first therapist was great in Pennsylvania, but then I moved to Colorado Springs. I had one good therapist, and then I had therapists that just put me on a bike and walked away.

[A]

Yeah. Do you feel like it's like the check, the checklist, like, we talked about this before, and a lot of the clients that I get now, they've already done physical therapy, or they'll do the physical therapy and then they'll see me. And like I always say, what I do is the after. I wanted to do physical therapy back then. It was saturated and I still wanted to do it. But then the more people that I saw, the more clients I saw, they were like, physical therapy, whatever. I don't know what to do afterwards. And that just really touched my heart. Little did I know there's going to be no money in this after, but that I'd be poor. The church mouse. But it. Even though that's the case, there's nothing that is sweeter than having someone say, I stood for the first time in the shower. Like, I stood, stood. I, I didn't just stand for a second and they didn't do, click, done. I stood and I felt safe. So that's a very different thing when your muscles and, you know where your center is and you're, you're getting stronger. And so I think I, I relate to you so much in the sense. Well, my own body, but in the sense that so many clients get flustered with this, like, check mark. A lot of times that they do in physical therapy, there's like, okay, you walk, you're done. And, and so a lot of times I will tell clients, we're going to go backwards. Don't get mad at me. I'm just, I'm just telling you I didn't do this. And then now we're going to have to go forward. And so a lot of times, what I'll say is sometimes we develop bad brain plasticity in order just to function, in order just to get around. And so now we're going to create some good plasticity. They're like, seriously, I'm like, we have to, because we're doing some things that are really messing up our bodies. Make sense, right?

[B]

And, yeah, it makes a lot of sense. And it's. I think one of the frustrations, and I, I, everybody I talk to on Strokeway Radio has the same frustration is we're not told a whole lot of stuff, right? Like, this is going to be the hardest thing you've Ever done in your life. You're going to have mental health issues.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Your physical therapy is done at six months or a year. And they say it's good as it's going to get.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And I was so angry anyway after the first ambulance driver that, you know, I didn't pay attention. I didn't.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it took me a while to learn. I mean, I. I was so angry about therapy and not doing stuff at home, which they didn't tell us we had to, that I got up to 280 pounds. So there was an issue there too. So it took six and a half years before I realized there's a difference between a physical therapist for, for example, workers comp. Or, you know, those kind of things and a neurophysical therapist.

[A]

Amen.

[B]

So once I found that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's like you said, I can run. I. They put me in a water treadmill.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I. I held down for dear life at 1.5 speed.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But it eventually. And it was like when we got up to 2.8, I had to stop.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[B]

And I started crying.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because I never thought I'd run again.

[A]

That you do that again. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. And you know, after six and a half to seven years.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's six months with a neurophysical therapist.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I got an afo. I got the water treadmill. Seven years. I was off my cane Walker.

[A]

That's so awesome. I loved hearing that.

[B]

And again, it was, am I a survivor or a fighter?

[A]

Right. I just did that the other day. I did myths and that was a big myth that I hated hearing. And six, six months you're done. Whatever you are. After a stroke you are. And I'm like, big myth that frustrates me like so, so much because, you know, I. I purposely will show those testimonial or show those people that I'm working with that are years after that that are doing things that they did for a second in physical therapy, you know, in month one or month two. And then it was like, all right, done. And they might have done it wrong or right, but. And now they're like, I can't do this. And I want to. Another one that got me choked up. I want to dance with my wife. He went to a wedding last week and danced with his wife. So. Something they said he'd never do. And I was like, yes, you will. You're with me and you will. So I think that hopefully. And one of the things that tell me if this relates to you is, you know, We've got to change our. Our ideas of. Of what it's going to be, having those goals. You know, we had goals before. These things happen, but changing the goals and having them be something that is. Is challenging but doable and so that we can. When we reach, like, little parts and we're getting there, we. We celebrate them. Tangible goals that we can do. I think a lot of times we focus on the negative. Was that something that you struggled with?

[B]

Yeah. And I think it's partly because we're surrounded by the negative. When you try and do something and you quote, unquote, fail, yeah, you stop doing it. But there was some point in time, and I don't know really what triggered it. I do know what triggered it. I was in some dark moments twice during the early recovery, and I looked up on a wall and I saw the picture of my grandchildren, and I said, nah, no more. And I think that was what triggered me to start doing things that I always did. And no matter how bad it looked, I. I kept doing it till it became normal.

[A]

Yeah. Good for you. That's inspirational to so many people that will hear this, Val.

[B]

I hope so, because what's your why?

[A]

I always say, what's your why? And you just said it. You looked at those grandbabies and you're like, that's my why.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, it is. And, you know, I have 11 grandchildren, and now I have 11. Yeah. And now I have two great grandchildren, and I'm not old enough for that.

[A]

So who's your favorite? No, you don't. You don't. Who's your favorite? I'm just kidding. I would never do that. It's like asking, who's your favorite kid? Right? No, I just have my one new grandbaby. And I'll tell you, I do the same thing. I look at little videos and I'm like, you're my why. You're my why.

[B]

God's gift for getting old.

[A]

Yeah, for sure. For sure. So you started doing. So you started realizing, I can do more, I can do this. I'm not going to give up. And then I don't want to go too far ahead. We'll go back and forth because people know I'm like, I'm a woman. I'm a spider web. I go all over. And then somehow we bring it in. So how did you know that you wanted to did even advocating? Because, you know, back in the day, when we were dying, when I was diagnosed and almost 2,000, there was no advocating. That wasn't even something that we talked about. And we definitely didn't advocate for ourselves. We didn't even understand that. When did you feel that you could not just disagree with your doctor and do something different, but that you could actually start advocating for yourself in a different way?

[B]

Well, I think there's was two stages to that. First one was the daily. You know, my daily at 5, 6 years. How am I going to do this? And that was doing things I used to. And trying and trying and trying. And I recognized, like you said before, those small victories every day.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, when I could put the walker aside and cook or. Or they gave me a stool so I can cook in the kitchen.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, I love cooking, so. I mean, I'm written in Italian.

[A]

Wow. I may come over.

[B]

Ye.

[A]

I love that.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah. But I think the second stage was when I found other survivors. That. That's when I realized that I had to advocate for myself because they advocated for me. So they helped me inspire myself. And as a result, we became this family, this community.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Every victory was celebrated with all of us.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So. And that became a huge, huge part of my recovery and I think other people's revenge.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because.

[A]

So now, was that a support group then?

[B]

Excuse me? At first, it wasn't a support group. It was just meeting other stroke survivors.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

What was. We were going through.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

You know, or TBI survivors or whatever the brain attack was. Then it became. Then when I started with support groups, it became gigantic. I mean, support groups are amazing.

[A]

Yeah, absolutely.

[B]

I want. I go to a big zoom one second or fourth Tuesday of every month still. I started a men's club support group. I go to. We do a caregiver support group. We do it.

[A]

That's great.

[B]

You know, so there's.

[A]

That's important right there. I think it. It's missed a lot. I don't have a caregiver, but I think it's so important. I've watched that so much, and I've watched caregivers, you know, when I do different podcasts, and the caregiver looks so exhausted, and he or she's not going to say that. And it's so important that someone sees that and says, this is what we're going to do. What are your. Some of your favorite things? I, you know, people come in and I got. I'm. I'm going to take care of he or she, and you're going to go to a game, you're going to do this. You're going to go for a massage. And. And I think that's so important to have done. And it's because, you know, the person that is sick, sometimes we can't see past that when we're feeling really crappy. It's not that we don't love and want them to have that. We just can't see past the pain. And I got to get out of this so that I can be me again. And it takes sometimes someone else to help and say, I'm going to take care of the caregiver as well. Introducing the pulse device. Cutting edge wearable device. Revolutionary wellness. Designed to stimulate circulation, reduce harsh pain and tightness, and speed up recovery. The pulse device uses advanced vibro tactile technology trusted by patients, clinicians and wellness professionals. Whether you're recovering from an injury, battling a neural condition, or just want to feel the best every day, Pulse helps you rechange, recharge so that you can live and feel better. Lightweight, powerful and easy to use. Experience better performance, better recovery and a better you. Order now and save $30 using my code Ms. [e-mail] the Pulse device. Is your health recharged? You won't be disappointed. Get it now for yourself. I have it. I love it. Go ahead and grab it.

[B]

Yeah. And I'm with you. I was on single recovery. I did not have care partners during that time and I didn't understand that part of it. And once I started talking to support groups and support groups that were open to caregivers, you start to see the big picture.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know that there's a. There's a lot of communication that's lacking.

[A]

Yeah. Maybe we see it more because we are single.

[B]

Could be.

[A]

Maybe.

[B]

I think that that is a good point. But it's. It's something that becomes really important and then you then all of a sudden you get hit with, oh, my God, I need to share this.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Somebody. I don't want people to go through the angry five years in a dark moment.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, how many people do we lose to suicide or a breath attack?

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

It's way too many.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, it's. I sat down and wrote a whole bunch of questions yesterday. Does the brain attack affect personality? Does it affect humor? Does it affect this? And how do you address that? Well, guess what? There's other people out there that know. Have been through that and can help you.

[A]

Yes, 100%. I think that that is in again in like the support groups that I'll. I do like a one with another person. That is for people that are newly diagnosed, like within the five years. And then I do just a women's one. 100%. 100% with you, like the mental health and the depression and stuff like that. But I think that those are great questions. So what do you do with those?

[B]

With.

[A]

With the questions that you have?

[B]

Yeah, I do research. I have Stroke Warrior Radio. So I'm fortunate that I've. Over the last three years of having the radio, I've interviewed close to 1500, 1800 people.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I think that's what's teaching me all these things is I asked the questions.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I. I think it was, I don't know, maybe seven years after that, I said to myself, the only dumb question is the one you don't ask.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I asked the craziest question. You know, one physical therapist said something to me about what you want to do. Finally asked me what I wanted. Yeah. And I said I was a contractor. I. I can't climb a ladder anymore. She brought a ladder into physical therapy.

[A]

Really?

[B]

If I didn't say that, she wouldn't have done that.

[A]

Right, right.

[B]

You know, so I mean, the only dumb questions are one you don't ask. So I started asking more and more questions. I did more research. I talk to more survivors and care partners talk to more medical people, therapists. I mean, on the radio. I talk to therapists, survivors every day.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

There's a show every day.

[A]

I love that.

[B]

You know, so there's. Again, it's a community, and that's what's saved my recovery.

[A]

Yeah. I love. When did you. Okay, so let's go to the stroke. When did that start and how did it begin?

[B]

Stroke Warrior Radio.

[A]

Yeah. How did it even start? What was the thinking?

[B]

I was at a. I was at a walking wheel, a thon for stroke Awareness, Oregon. I got introduced to this guy by. From Stroke Awareness, Oregon. And he said to me, that voice, you could put me to sleep. I said, what, is that a compliment or what?

[A]

Right. I'd be like.

[B]

And he said, no, no, no, that's. You could be on a radio.

[A]

Yeah. You have a great radio voice.

[B]

Well, thanks. And about four minutes after that, he said, you know what? There's this platform out there that we can do, an Internet cloud based radio station, and let's do it for stroke people. So we started doing research and it took six months to build it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But I went on the air April, May 4th in 2023.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And it, it just worked. You know, there was a platform to do it. I knew what I wanted. I. I wanted to communicate all the things they didn't tell me. So that's how I've. I approached it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, I. Asking the weird questions. Asking, you know, what. What about cooking? What about. Yeah, what about.

[A]

So when you ask the question. So you had someone on each day that you would ask on those. Okay. So you'd ask like, let's say you're going to have someone about cooking. Who would you have on about cooking?

[B]

I had. I have a variety of people. Number one, I had a nutritionist.

[A]

Cool. Yeah.

[B]

Michelle Ruthenstein. She did a fantastic job. I hope to get her back soon. I talked to another nutritionist, Sarah Coon, here in Bend, Oregon. I started to talk to a stroke coordinator.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

That is raising awareness and education about stroke. And her and her son came on and did a couple recipe shows.

[A]

Oh, I love that.

[B]

Yeah. On fat free, whatever.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

So again, that created more research.

[A]

Right.

[B]

So I'm transitioning to a Mediterranean diet now.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, so there's.

[A]

I do a lot of steps. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. But I love that you do that. Like, we do a lot of the same kind of how we do our podcast. So I do like with patients and I'll do people who are creating things for us to make life easier. Then I'll. If I've got questions that I think, you know, my listeners want, I'll have doctors on to answer some questions and, you know, doctors that I respect and like. And so I think that that's great. I love how you started that. So now, now that it's kind of, it's been on for a while and it's kind of forming into things that you, that you want. What do you. Where do you see it kind of going now?

[B]

I think we're expanding into the. The radio itself is an Internet cloud based radio station. So what it is is 8 hours or 12 hours a day, every hour and in between music. But certain time of day is therapists, certain time of day of survivors, certain time as care partners, certain times bma. There's one area that I was angry about that I, I didn't find out about an AFO until seven years. Nobody told me I ever suggested once I had that my life changed.

[A]

Now for you, what does an AFO look like? Is it like the tall one? Is it like the short one?

[B]

Yeah, I had the tall one that went up just below my knee and down towards the left side and then my shoe. But that's one of those things I didn't know in the beginning. I don't want other people to know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I, I brought on DME people and I brought on equipment manufacturers, and I'm still doing that today. Yeah, we've got several. Good, good people.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

On shoes.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

On a unit to get in and out of bed and.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Showers, you know, there's all kinds of things available.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

I think it's expanding. We're listening to. In 55 countries, but now we're. We've expanded to YouTube. We're going to start doing live shows and live podcasts in January.

[A]

That's awesome.

[B]

We're going to start to do panel shows. We've got four collaboration shows.

[A]

That's great.

[B]

Yeah. Like Stacy Grim on my Stroke of Hope. I do a joint show on different things.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

There's another speech therapist.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

That we. We're doing speech shows. So it's. I just see it expanding. I. Yeah. Dying for the day. I can do it full time. Full time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I also work. I work a regular job.

[A]

Yeah. Okay.

[B]

It's amazing how much you're in the.

[A]

Same as I am, where I say, I do this, and I'm like, I want to do more of this, and I still want my clients, but I'm trying to figure out, you know, how. How to do it all in one. But I do really like doing the podcast a lot. I think it's very helpful and I wish I could give. I want to do more of that, and so that's kind of where I'm leading myself. And then to just have more of like, well, I'll talk to you about it later. This is. This is me interviewing you. So. So the radio show is. Is doing well, but you've got. I love that you've got lots of. Lots of ideas for us. You're not like, you're not coming down. You're not kind of like, okay, we're going to just kind of wind it down. You're moving up. You just keep going. So I love that. So what do your kids think about what you're doing?

[B]

I talking to my daughter just three days ago, and she said, dad, I've been watching your YouTubes and your shorts on your social medias, and I gotta tell you, I'm proud of you.

[A]

Isn't that the best?

[B]

Yeah, it really is. My other daughter told me when I saw her for the first time after so many years, she said, dad, you're better than you were before your stroke.

[A]

Oh, you know, I love that.

[B]

You know, it's. It's just amazing how it's developing and I think the reason I keep going is because I've heard so many positive feedback from people that said, thank you.

[A]

Yes, I can.

[B]

I appreciate what you're doing, and I do more to help, you know, those kind of things.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So it's something that's worthwhile. I mean, 55 countries.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, every week.

[A]

That's awesome.

[B]

Oh, my God. I got Israel. Oh, my God. Is Palestine or.

[A]

So how did you, like, how did. With the radio. Like, you know, we all have different ways different. That we air podcasts. How did you. The guy asked you to do the radio and then you just started doing that and it aired on different. Did it. Was there already things going on in that radio program and you were part of that. Okay, so this was just a. One that you were going to start.

[B]

This started completely from scratch. And I was told by the server company that runs the radio platform that this was the only stroke radio in the world.

[A]

Yeah. Because I've never seen one, so.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. I mean, I know stroke TVs out there.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's Aaron of it. But, you know, there's. It was just so exciting for me to realize that, you know what? Somebody's not gonna have to be so angry as I was.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Now. So I keep doing it, you know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I think there's. There's a place out there. One of my friends, for example, one of her dreams is to fill up Yankee Stadium with a stroke convention.

[A]

Oh, I love that. I love that.

[B]

Isn't that cool idea?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So, I mean, there's other organizations out there and we need to. I want to be the search engine for stroke and TBI survivors.

[A]

I've got an idea for. I'll tell you after when we're done with this for the stadium. I'm writing that down because my. My memory is about 30 seconds sometimes. Better write that down.

[B]

That's one of the things we still go through, and that's something that I have to recognize because sometimes I'm terrible at following up. I miss appointments, you know, those kind of things. Because of the cognitive issues.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But you know what? Nobody told me, for example. Talk about that. Nobody told me that occupational therapists have mental health training as well.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And help with those issues.

[A]

Right, right.

[B]

That was just a year ago.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I found out one of the things she did for me was put me on a date book again.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Everything's in a, you know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

A time. Time saver, daytimer type thing.

[A]

Yeah. And I think, too, with a lot of, like, A lot of that is that, you know, it makes. It helps us too. You know, I think, like, having it helps us to do better with people. Like, a lot of times, like, if I said this before to you, like, if I was going to train you and we're going to work and you looked like you were just feeling hopeless, I would say, okay, hold. Hold up. Let's do some breathing. You know, let's breathe a little. And I think that's so important to have a therapist or someone that you work with physically that knows you or that has some of the same things. So they can say, okay, we're. We're not going to grow some brain plasticity today if you're here, and we're going to try to do this. So I think that's such a big piece. And what you're saying is that the therapists, the people that you're working with now get it, and so they're helping you do things that are like, okay, yeah, I've got to write this down, because cognitively, people don't always get that when we have a brain injury or something happens cognitively for all of us, sometimes worse than others, there are things that are just slipping by. And, yeah, it's not the same for, you know, for our. Our neighbor who's like, I know what you're saying. You're like, not really. You really don't. It's not the same thing. Or I'm so tired and it's like, not really not the same.

[B]

Yeah. You know, there's. There's things that we all didn't know that we should have known.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

We didn't know about the brain fatigue.

[A]

Right.

[B]

We didn't know about the sleep fatigue. We didn't know, you know, all those little things. In my mind. When I started, I had a physical therapist and an occupational therapist that helped me with my handwriting.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You know, it was like. But it. It was years later before I found there's like 12 therapies that we need.

[A]

Right? Yeah.

[B]

You know, physical, occupational, speech. I didn't get a speech therapist till seven years.

[A]

Yeah. I would say there's 12s that we need. 12 is like 10 to 12s that we need.

[B]

Yeah. There's massage therapy, there's chiropractor, there's acupuncture.

[A]

And why is that massage not covered, exactly?

[B]

Well, why am I not covered?

[A]

Mine is not.

[B]

It's covered as physical therapy. I don't know how they did it, but it's.

[A]

I don't know. I'm gonna look at Your, Your insurance.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. There's, you know, and there's just. We just have to tell other people what's going on.

[A]

Yeah, for sure.

[B]

They don't have to sit in front of that phone.

[A]

Exactly. Yeah.

[B]

That's a.

[A]

That's a big. You and I are right on the same page. Is that just. Again, knowledge is power, and if you have it, then you understand how to do. Now, now, okay, you've got it. But now we've got to say, write it down in your notes because you're going to forget it. You're going to have it right now. Then you're going to. We're going to end it. You're going to be like, what they say was so good. So one, it's on the podcast. You can see it again. But two, get used to putting it, whether it's in your notes, on the phone, whatever works for you. If it's hard to write down, then that's why we've got, you know, AI and things like that. So we, we don't have to always, you know, do that. So. Because those are important, because you're giving a lot of important things. And when we have, you know, podcasts, we have things like that. I think it's. It's super crucial to, you know, to know that we don't always have to remember everything there's. Because you get that nervousness like, I'm going to forget. I'm going to forget and breathe and think, oh, yeah, I can, I can. I can jot this down. This doesn't have to be. I have to remember it all. Or do you feel this too? I know a lot of clients will tell me I'm really nerved up because they're not being patient with me. And I say, and I wonder if you say this, you just tell them, this is what I'm dealing with. I need you to sleep. Slow down. Because I need to. I need to get this down. I'm in my phone, so would you please slow down? And I'm going to put this in. Sometimes it works.

[B]

That work is another step in the whole process, I think, is that you have to assert yourself in those situations that cause you consternation.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

You know, it's like, okay, am I just gonna ignore the way they're pushing me or.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Judging me or whatever.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You know, one of the things I learned going on the doing these videos is I have heard of this Kinesia from a past mixed mix, misdiagnosed.

[A]

Tell people that don't know what that is.

[B]

Weird movements that you get because of some of the prescriptions you take. I don't know if I've had people tell me I have weird movements in my mouth that I can't control, but. And I've always been embarrassed by it. But once I started doing this, it's like. It's on there. It's on the video, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Get over it. There's something that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Develop because of a bad diagnosis, but it's what I've got.

[A]

I haven't seen it. If it makes you feel better.

[B]

Yeah. Well, thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah, I feel it. You know, I'm getting through the process of recognizing that these things that may upset me or these people that may upset me shouldn't be upsetting. I mean, I can only control my actions and reactions, not theirs.

[A]

Yeah, absolutely.

[B]

I. I think I just do what I do, and if it doesn't work, it doesn't work. Maybe it'll work next time.

[A]

Yeah, I love that. Thank you so much for joining me for another episode of the Move it or Lose it podcast. It would mean the world to me if you subscribed and left a review. Remember, you can find me on Apple, Spotify, Stitcher, and YouTube. New episodes of the Move it or Lose it podcast air every other Wednesday. If you have any suggestions for future guests or topics, please visit my [e-mail]. until next time.