MBMBaM 797: Safe and Full of Grubs

Release Date: January 19, 2026
Hosts: Justin, Travis, and Griffin McElroy

Episode Overview

This episode of "My Brother, My Brother, and Me" (MBMBaM) delivers the classic McElroy blend of comedic riffing, wildly off-topic pop culture tangents, and dubious-yet-entertaining advice. Justin, Travis, and Griffin tackle listener questions about school bus logistics, backyard grubs, and pelvic floor therapy, but not before spending the first act gleefully deconstructing hypothetical movie sequels, AI-powered marketing stunts, and the peculiarities of bird-watching competitions. As ever, the brothers’ chemistry shines—quick-witted, irreverent, and honest to a fault.

Pop Culture Tangents and Intro Antics

1. Evolving Brothers’ Nicknames

[01:08–02:17]

• Travis unveils his latest nickname options (“Big Dog. Woof woof. Vroom vroom. Big unit McElroy.”), leading to playful back-and-forth about what’s pushing his “brand” too much.
  • Memorable Moment:

  “I think it’s a little bit… It’s giving Usador.” – Griffin ([01:36])

2. The Power of a Movie Catchphrase

[03:43–07:44]

• They discuss the never-ending “Meet the Fockers” franchise and riff on what absurd sequels might be called (“Motherfuckers”, “Focker in Law”, etc.).
• Justin notes the cultural immortality of the “I have nipples, Greg, could you milk me?” joke.
  • Quote:

  “I think that joke is so powerful it escaped the bounds of that movie and etched itself in the American consciousness.” – Justin ([06:01])

• Imagines the phrase showing up in other movies (“Joker”, “Die Hard”) with comedic effect.

3. The Fictional Show Pitch Parade

[09:01–14:40]

• Justin describes a new Patrick Dempsey series, “Memory of a Killer,” featuring a hitman with Alzheimer’s, prompting the brothers to lampoon the convoluted plot (“Are we rooting for Mr. Dempsey? Is this like werewolf rules?”).
  • Quip:

  “This Alzheimer’s story needs a body count. I don’t think that’s what we’ve been missing.” – Travis ([13:27])

• They brainstorm even worse plot twists, including photocopier-related clones and mock TV demakes (“Toner Cloner,” “Toner Cloner Boner” as a potential sequel punchline).

Key Listener Questions & Advice

1. Can a Teacher Ride the School Bus?

[15:53–23:43]

• A teacher asks if they can/should ride the school bus for their commute.
• Discussion banters through both policy and the intensely awkward scenario of being “the adult” among students during transit.
  • Quote:

  “Can you imagine having to sit next to a teacher on the bus every day… are we in trouble?” – Justin ([16:22])

• They consider solutions like a “first-class teacher’s pod,” a pulsating blue-light isolation chamber for teachers.
• Debate the increased responsibility for supervising students on the ride.
  • Quote:

  “You have now added extra job to your day. Awesome.” – Griffin ([18:36])

• Ends with hilarious role-play about what kind of degrees the hypothetical teacher would have, including law and medicine, and the resulting complications in event of bus emergencies.

2. How to Beat Your Dad in “The Big Year” Birding Challenge

[24:43–29:16]

• Listener’s dad is taking their father-child birdwatching competition way too seriously.
• Strategies suggested: tactical lying (“say you saw a condor”), visiting zoos (hot debate if zoo birds count), trust as the only birder currency, and ultimately, the absurd escalation to mythical creatures.
  • Quote:

  “Trust is the only commodity in the birder community. Once you lose that…” – Griffin ([29:03])

  • “I haven’t heard from my birder group chat since I said I saw the giant golden eagle from Rescuers Down Under.” – Travis ([29:16])

Munch Squad: Brand Food Gimmicks, AI, and Bonkers Beef

[35:36–46:59]

1. The Return of Steak Stroganoff at Noodles & Company

• Justin delivers a Munch Squad update about the “cult favorite” Steak Stroganoff returning as “Strogan ON.”
• Critiques the marketer-speak: AI-powered AI mini melodramas dramatizing fan posts, ad agency involvement, and made-up job titles (e.g., “Chief Strogan Officer”).
  • Quote:

  “Steak Stroganoff fans did more than ask for its return. They showed us how deeply this dish is woven into their rituals, memories, engravings…” – Justin (reading press release, [38:31])

  • Griffin’s incredulity: “Who would say that? What is the context in which that would be suggested?” ([38:48])

2. Arby’s: The Beef Juice Novak Conspiracy

• Review of Arby’s new “Italian Beef Dip,” and its House of Italian Beef pop-up, co-promoted by BJ Novak.
• Griffin’s campaign to get BJ Novak officially renamed “Beef Juice Novak,” lamenting lost marketing synergy.
  • Quote:

  “You can do a lot with that, but it seems like you haven’t done the best thing with that, which is a commercial series in which he says, now I’m proud to announce that BJ stands for Beef Juice.” – Griffin ([44:11])

• Jokes about The Office being rebranded for beef synergy (“They really backdoored the beef pretty hard on this one.” – Griffin, [45:21])

Advice Questions Part Two

3. Grubs Overtaking the Backyard

[47:08–51:36]

• Listener plagued by post-rain grubs wants to “borrow someone else’s chicken” without suspicion.
• McElroys dissect the ethics and legalities of chicken ownership while proposing absurd bird-attracting solutions (allure-crows, “welcome crow” scarecrows).
  • Quote:

  “Not wanting to own a chicken is enough. It doesn’t have to also be illegal.” – Justin ([48:08])

• Justin imagines vaporizing grubs with a pressure washer and muses on the deeper interconnectedness of grub molecules and “the great chain.”
  • Quote:

  “Every breath you take has a little bit of Julius Caesar’s last breath and a little bit of grubs.” – Justin ([51:09])

4. Pelvic Floor Therapy Conversation Starters

[51:43–54:29]

• Listener asks for non-invasive conversation topics during invasive pelvic floor therapy.
• The brothers suggest bringing up “Stranger Things,” memorizing a thousand great jokes (Justin’s yet-to-be-written joke book), or bartering with crows to write jokes in exchange for grubs:
  • Quote:

  “There is no pelvic floor exam that can withstand a thousand great jokes.” – Justin ([53:17])

Top Quotes & Notable Moments

• “It sucks that my enthusiasm for recording a podcast with my brothers could be mistaken as prepared competence.” – Justin ([02:33])
• “If you get on the back of a bus skitch style, it should be okay because you found a loophole and one that looks fucking cool at that.” – Griffin ([16:05])
• “This is where opportunity exists. It’s in that narrow crevice between good ideas and bad ideas.” – Justin ([49:03])
• “We don't need AI. We need a lot of crows. Smart. We need a lot of smart crows.” – Justin ([54:29])

Episode Structure and Flow

• Opening Banter: [00:00–03:43] (introductions, nicknames)
• Movie/TV Pop Culture Tangents: [03:43–14:40]
• Advice Questions (Segment 1): [15:43–24:43]
• Birding Competition Advice: [24:43–29:16]
• Munch Squad Segment: [35:36–46:59]
• Advice Questions (Segment 2): [47:08–54:29]
• Episode Wind-Down / Self-Promotion: [55:16–end]

Tone & Style

As always, the McElroys’ tone is playful, subversive, and occasionally delightfully vulgar. They riff off each other’s tangents with the comfort of long-practiced improv, blending genuine curiosity (on topics like “The Big Year” and pelvic floor health) with rapid-fire absurdity. Even the ad reads are opportunities for bits and escalation.

Standout Episode Moments

• Travis referring to Joe Rogan-themed AI confusion: “It took a lot... the AI kept wanting to make it Joe Roganoff.” ([40:23])
• The idea of a “Chief Strogan Officer” and bewilderment over AI-generated marketing campaigns ([41:20])
• Existential musings about birds and the great circle of grubs
• Griffin’s campaign for “Beef Juice Novak” as untapped advertising gold ([44:11])
• The episode’s titular moment: the concept of returning a borrowed chicken “safe and full of grubs.” ([49:03])

Summary

Episode 797 is vintage MBMBaM—an energetic blend of pop-culture nonsense, playful argument, and left-field advice—laced with memorable quotes and improv lunacy. Highlights include movie pitch riffs, AI-marketing takedowns, weird bird-watching strategies, and a surreal meditation on the endless circle of backyard grubs and crows. If you missed the episode, this rundown captures the whiplash humor and heart: advice you can't trust, but definitely want to hear.