Did Denzel Do The Bending?!: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode

Summary

Summary of "Did Denzel Do The Bending?!: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode" on "My Momma Told Me"

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Podcast Information

• Title: My Momma Told Me
• Hosts: Langston Kerman and David Borey
• Description: Comedians delve into exciting, groundbreaking, and sometimes problematic Black conspiracy theories. They feature guests who discuss everything from silly to scary conspiracies, often inspired by quirky family anecdotes.
• Episode: Did Denzel Do The Bending?!: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode
• Release Date: December 12, 2024

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Introduction

In this mini episode of "My Momma Told Me," Langston Kerman and David Borey tackle a humorous and speculative conspiracy theory centered around the acclaimed actor Denzel Washington. The episode blends comedic dialogue with satirical exploration of celebrity rumors, maintaining an engaging and light-hearted tone throughout.

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Key Discussions and Insights

1. Setting the Stage ([03:11] - [07:00])

• Hosts’ Opening Banter:
  • Langston Kerman: Introduces the podcast’s mission to explore deep Black conspiracy theories with a humorous twist.
    • Quote ([03:28]): "Me, the podcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theories."
  • David Borey: Expresses nostalgia for celebrities like Sean Paul and discusses their cultural impact and identity changes over time.
    • Quote ([03:54]): “I really miss Sean Paul, man.”

2. Introducing the Denzel Washington Conspiracy ([08:03] - [11:04])

• Listener Engagement:
  • Email from Freddie: Sparks the main topic with the provocative subject line, "Was Denzel the one doing the bending?"
    • Quote ([08:29]): "Was Denzel the one doing the bending. No question mark, but it's implied."
• Speculative Analysis:
  • The hosts humorously dissect the email, interpreting "bending" as a metaphor for alleged personal behaviors or hidden aspects of Denzel’s life.
    • Quote ([10:05]): “Amari Hardwick, I presume. But yeah, Freddie, you could have told us.”

3. Deep Dive into Denzel’s Persona ([11:04] - [24:39])

• Sexuality and Identity Speculations:

  • Langston Kerman: Questions whether Denzel Washington identifies as gay, referencing his private nature and comparing him to other celebrities.
    • Quote ([17:53]): “If Denzel is, in fact, doing the bending on an Amari Hardwick, it's just cool. They all, man, they all agreed to it.”
  • David Borey: Discusses public perceptions of Denzel’s relationships and addresses misconceptions about his personal life.
    • Quote ([22:05]): “I think Denzel Washington, in a way that will always make him a hero to me, truly believes in the art form that he's committed his life to.”

• Celebrity Privacy and Public Image:

  • Both hosts emphasize the importance of respecting celebrities' private lives and challenge the validity of unverified rumors.
    • Quote ([24:23]): “I think, if anything, he was probably waking them up at weird hours so that they could recite fucking Shakespearean monologues and shit.”

4. Broader Implications and Public Perception ([24:39] - [38:48])

• Impact of Rumors on Legacy:

  • Langston Kerman: Reflects on how unfounded rumors can affect a celebrity's legacy, using Denzel as an example.
    • Quote ([24:30]): “I like it for the, for the jokes. I don't give a fuck. On a person to person level, I go like, these are grown men. This is all silly.”
  • David Borey: Explores whether public figures like Drake can recover from personal setbacks or controversies.
    • Quote ([35:56]): “You really can't kill something that is as big as Drake is like that. You really can't.”

• Comparison with Other Celebrities:

  • The hosts compare Denzel’s situation with other public figures, discussing how different personalities manage public scrutiny.
    • Quote ([38:48]): “And I love the Kendrick album. It was cool. I just don't. I can't. I have a hard time. I noticed with that last beef.”

5. Celebrity Feuds and Public Interest ([40:02] - [39:32])

• Transition to Drake and Hip-Hop Feud:

  • The episode briefly shifts focus to Drake’s ongoing feuds, analyzing how personal conflicts within the hip-hop community affect public perception.
    • Quote ([30:21]): “So he says, who knows where this nigga's from? Actually, my question, and this is one I've been wrestling with for a few days now.”

• Fan Base and Public Reactions:

  • Discussion on how deeply fans engage with celebrity feuds and whether these conflicts have lasting impacts.
    • Quote ([32:09]): “He keeps. I mean, I think it's. And maybe it's one of those things where it's like, you reap what you sow eventually.”

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Langston Kerman ([03:28]): "Me, the podcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theories."
• David Borey ([04:03]): "That era's top Jamaica."
• Langston Kerman ([22:05]): "I think Denzel Washington, in a way that will always make him a hero to me, truly believes in the art form that he's committed his life to."
• David Borey ([35:56]): "You really can't kill something that is as big as Drake is like that."

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Conclusions and Takeaways

• Respect for Privacy: The hosts emphasize the importance of distinguishing between public personas and private lives, advocating for respect towards celebrities’ personal boundaries.

• Skepticism Towards Rumors: Kerman and Borey approach conspiracy theories with a mix of humor and critical thinking, underscoring the need for evidence before believing sensational claims.

• Cultural Impact of Celebrities: The discussion highlights how influential figures like Denzel Washington and Drake shape cultural narratives and public discourse, sometimes beyond their immediate professional contributions.

• Humorous Satire: Throughout the episode, the hosts use satire to navigate serious topics, making the content entertaining while prompting listeners to think critically about celebrity culture and the spread of rumors.

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Final Thoughts

In this engaging mini episode, Langston Kerman and David Borey successfully blend humor with insightful commentary on celebrity conspiracies. By focusing on a fictionalized rumor about Denzel Washington, they explore broader themes of identity, privacy, and the influence of public figures within the Black community. Whether you're a longtime listener or new to "My Momma Told Me," this episode offers a witty and thought-provoking take on the intersection of comedy and conspiracy theories.

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Transcript

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[Langston Kerman]

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[David Borey]

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[Langston Kerman]

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[David Borey]

Just give me the light and pass the dro bust another bottle of Mo Gol. Them enemy sites and I gots to know which one is going to catch my flow. Welcome, little mamas and gentiles alike, to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told.

[Langston Kerman]

Me, the podcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets of black conspiracy.

[David Borey]

Theories and we finally work to prove the conspiracies of you, the listener. It's a motherfucking mini episode.

[Langston Kerman]

Meow. Peon, peon, Pew. It's a mini episode. That's. That's a sound of the police. That's the sound of me.

[David Borey]

I really miss Sean Paul, man.

[Langston Kerman]

Do you?

[David Borey]

I feel like in every era there needs to be one Jamaican on top.

[Langston Kerman]

I'll say that there needs to be.

[David Borey]

That era's top Jamaica.

[Langston Kerman]

He was a top Jamaican and I really did value him while he was here. I will say that he is funny looking now in a way that's hard to. Yeah, it's tough to look at when you. With. I think some of the cultural shifts that we've made. Like he's light skinned in a way that doesn't even feel black. You know what I mean? And then it becomes this weird. He's bald now and it's just a weird game to play with Sean Paul.

[David Borey]

Was he black?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, I think that was the implication. I think that's why. Oh, what? Maybe I was mistaken. Maybe he was never meant to be black.

[David Borey]

I always thought he was one of the like, because I. He truly. What I thought I was assuming he was like a Puerto Rican.

[Langston Kerman]

Whoa.

[David Borey]

That's just because they're all down there. It makes sense that a couple would go to Jamaica. It's not all. You know what I'm saying?

[Langston Kerman]

I think if I'm not mistaken, Sean Paul identifies as a black Jamaican with Chinese Jamaican heritage.

[David Borey]

Oh, I know the Chinese are down there.

[Langston Kerman]

Just. They're real big down there and they also speak with the Jamaican accent. And there was a. When I lived in. When I lived in. In Crown Heights, Brooklyn, there used to be a. What's the word I'm looking for? There used to be a Chinese bakery that was like on the corner In a very Jamaican neighborhood. And if you went into the bakery, all the Chinese people had Jamaican accents. It was like a Jamaican Chinese bakery. And it was the silliest thing. Every time I went to. That's just a good time. Look at y'all. Okay.

[David Borey]

Yeah, I like that. I like that. I remember I was in Sierra Leone. I was on the bus one time, and they were ruthlessly berating a Chinese man racially. And then he started speaking Creole, and everybody went crazy. It was so exciting.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. All it takes is for you to suck your teeth and tell me to suck my mother. And suddenly they loved it.

[David Borey]

I loved it. I was very excited because at first I was like, this is not great.

[Langston Kerman]

No, this is a hate crime. But now we've learned. Now we've all learned.

[David Borey]

Now we're all having fun on this bus.

[Langston Kerman]

Come on, man. Except that Chinese dude, He's still upset.

[David Borey]

No. Yeah. He wasn't happy in any of it. Even when he. Because he yelled. They pushed him to the brink and he yelled at everybody.

[Langston Kerman]

Right?

[David Borey]

Damn. Yeah, it was a bummer.

[Langston Kerman]

No, but what a cool unicorn that you get to see out in the world. So I think Sean Paul, for me, had always identified as a black dude with, like, that kind of root. But maybe I'm tripping. Maybe he was, like, just a Puerto Rican Jamaican dude.

[David Borey]

Yeah, there has to be some.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, I think. But my stupid American brain has a real tough time understanding diversity in other places.

[David Borey]

You know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

Like, I truly.

[David Borey]

No. 100%. 100%. There's black people who just speak German. Right.

[Langston Kerman]

They're not. They're not, like, connected to us in any kind of way. We just think they. They are. Because of slavery.

[David Borey]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. No, the diaspora is big for even the Puerto Ricans.

[Langston Kerman]

Fuck. I'm sorry. Puerto Rico especially. I'm sorry, Puerto Rico. I didn't see you sooner. I'm. That's.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

And it's on. Boring. For saying that hateful. Hateful joke right at the end of.

[David Borey]

That was it. That was a hateful joke. That wasn't a hateful joke. They're everywhere. In a good way.

[Langston Kerman]

Spirited joke that he had. Come on. I'm coming from a place of love.

[David Borey]

We're not here to talk about Puerto Ricans, though.

[Langston Kerman]

We are not. Unfortunately, it's not your day. Puerto Ricans. Today we got an email from a person named Freddie. Freddie sent us an email that right away. The fucking. God. The subject line. It bites. It gives you so much. The subject line is. Was Denzel the one doing the bending. No question mark, but it's implied.

[David Borey]

I already want to read the body.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. You want to know more?

[David Borey]

Yeah. That was clickbait, and it got me, buddy.

[Langston Kerman]

This feels like when you scroll down to the end of a website you trust, and then you start seeing ads for websites you don't, and you're like, damn. Some of these do sound good, though.

[David Borey]

Yeah, but maybe I can't lose 30 pounds in 20 days.

[Langston Kerman]

Those are the biggest titties I've ever seen in my life. I should click on that.

[David Borey]

That everyone is coming from this game.

[Langston Kerman]

She can crush what with the go can. Okay, I'm listening. I'm listening.

[David Borey]

You want to read it? I'm excited. I just want to take it in. I'm very excited.

[Langston Kerman]

Freddie wrote, hey, Langston and Dave, it's your boy Freddy emailing y'all with some. That's been on my mind. So I was.

[David Borey]

Wait. This is already great. There's a few things. Yeah, it's your boy Freddie emailing y'all. We know.

[Langston Kerman]

The clues are all there, Freddie. We can piece it together. My man. When we open.

[David Borey]

No, but thanks for the narration.

[Langston Kerman]

I like a man who tells me what he did with his day.

[David Borey]

Exactly.

[Langston Kerman]

Freddie said. So I was watching an interview with that nigga from Power, the one that's in the Tyler Perry movie with Janet Jackson, and either getting bent over or bending over. You know who I'm talking about, right?

[David Borey]

Amari Hardwick.

[Langston Kerman]

Amari Hardwick, I presume. But. But, yeah, Freddie, you could have told us.

[David Borey]

That's from that great clip.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, it's a Maria Hardwick. He's very. He's acting his ass off. And Janet is, too. She did pretty good, too.

[David Borey]

Yeah, she's good at crying.

[Langston Kerman]

Anyway, this nigga said he used to live with Denzel. That actor, Denzel Washington, not Denzel Curry. I remember the nigga from Black Panther that died said some similar shit. Now I'm really wondering what Denzel really got going on. Is he bending niggas over?

[David Borey]

How many question marks?

[Langston Kerman]

Four or three question marks and no sign off. But he did write this from an Android phone. That is worth noting. Freddie. Freddie took out his Android to accuse Denzel Washington of bending over some of our finest stars.

[David Borey]

How do you. Okay. There's so much. Yeah, there's so much here. I think it is worth noting. Omari Hardwick is not gay. The character in that movie was gay.

[Langston Kerman]

Well, that's not how Freddie feels. But I. But I'm listening.

[David Borey]

Ghost loves pussy.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay. That's true.

[David Borey]

He loves It.

[Langston Kerman]

No, he loves money more, which to me, a little gay, but. All right. Yeah, I'm listening.

[David Borey]

That's fair. That's fair. There's a conversation to be had there, right?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. Yep.

[David Borey]

Did. Is there any other instances of more specifically Denzel being gay?

[Langston Kerman]

No, absolutely not. Other than him inviting children in need of support into his home, he's shown no signs of being a homosexual person. In fact, up until this Gladiator thing, which we talked about briefly, I don't think he's ever even, like, fucked around playing a gay character. Like.

[David Borey]

No, I don't think so.

[Langston Kerman]

His arguably greatest performance as an actor. One of them is Philadelphia, where he's just openly homophobic the entire time. Yeah, yeah.

[David Borey]

No, he went crazy.

[Langston Kerman]

I believed him. I was like, this motherfucker. Yeah.

[David Borey]

I think he might still think Tom Kings is kind of gay.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I saw what you did with Antonio Banderas in that movie. Weird that y'all were together. But anyway, more importantly, what the fuck?

[David Borey]

Yeah, I don't think Tom Hanks is. Or I don't think Antonio. If they were really gay dudes, I don't think. I don't think Tom Hanks got a shot. No.

[Langston Kerman]

They're not playing in the same league.

[David Borey]

No. That's crazy.

[Langston Kerman]

Not for nothing, I think Antonio Banderas can have whatever he wants.

[David Borey]

That's a. Yeah, I think it's open for him.

[Langston Kerman]

That's a sexy. He ain't gotta think.

[David Borey]

Yeah, I think it's wide open for him.

[Langston Kerman]

And he's not stopping at Tom Hanks. He could do what he want.

[David Borey]

And also, even within, like, Hollywood rumor mill type stuff, I think there's other famous black actors that are sort of known for being gay on the down low at this point. Denzel never even comes up in that conversation.

[Langston Kerman]

They don't even play with him like that.

[David Borey]

No, not at all. Not at all.

[Langston Kerman]

And I think he's reached the level of celebrity and certainly even, you know, I don't know if you saw this recently with Gladiator. He's been doing a fuck ton of press and being much more sort of open than he's ever been. Like, he's always been kind of a super private. You don't really know anything about that dude. Ass guy. And, like, he finally admitted, like, I was an alcoholic until I was 60 and, like, was drinking like crazy and it was truly ruining my life. And we were like, we didn't even know that shit, Denzel, like.

[David Borey]

Which is proof that these people could keep it private if they want to.

[Langston Kerman]

You don't even have. This doesn't even have to be everybody's business.

[David Borey]

We don't gotta know none of that shit about people. All these celebrities. We know Denzel was an alcoholic. I thought he was like a proxy father. For me, I'll say it.

[Langston Kerman]

He still is. And I felt devastated to not know that about my dad.

[David Borey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how you know he was a good dad. Because he hid it.

[Langston Kerman]

He drank. He was like, come on, man. What do you mean? But you were the most together man that I've ever seen in my life. How could you?

[David Borey]

I truly thought that. I thought that he was what Bill Cosby aspired to be.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

That's what I had always thought about Denzel. I always thought. Cause Bill Cosby always kind of came off as, like, especially towards the end. It came off very. Not for the people. In the same way that I feel like Denzel was always kind of, like, portrayed or whatever. So to find out that he was loose at all, at all is like, oof.

[Langston Kerman]

You know what video I always think about with Denzel is that video. I don't know if you've seen it. There's that YouTube video where he has to, like. I think he, like, has to pull over and pee or some shit like that. But he's. Anyway, either way, he stops at some house and ends up bumping into no one he knows. But just like, he, like, stops at a house and the lady's like, I.

[David Borey]

Know who you are.

[Langston Kerman]

He's like, oh, yeah, hey, how are you, ma'am? And he just starts hanging out with them, and it's on, like, the south side of Chicago. And then he starts talking about, oh, yeah, when I used to come over here in this area, I used to be coming over and kicking it with. I think he says, like, the. It's like a gang. It's the Blackstones, I think is who he says he was kicking it with. And they were like, that's who we are. He's like, oh, y'all are. And then he does that, the handshake with them and like, truly just a down ass dude.

[David Borey]

I. I have it if you want to hear it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, it's the best.

[David Borey]

And I see you on Jimmy Kimmel.

[Langston Kerman]

And all that clowning up.

[David Borey]

Yeah, we was clowning. But, you know, people the same everywhere you go, man. It ain't nothing what. What they used to do. I was a kid, I would get here and my cousin would. They pick out somebody my size, and I had to fight somebody my side. Yeah, they was rangers Y'all. Y'all too young to know about Blackstone Rangers.

[Langston Kerman]

That's what I am.

[David Borey]

Yeah. Yeah. But they don't exist as Blackstone Rangers no more, right? Y'all? Blackstone Rangers. So they still call y Blackstone Rangers. Wow. But I'm talking about get under the.

[Langston Kerman]

Moorish American act, you know what I'm saying? Cause I'm starting to get wild.

[David Borey]

Trying to live trying to live what's up, little man? You don't know who I am, but they'll tell you one day. What's your name? My name's Denzel. You tell your ass to big folk. Here we go. Watch them tonight, y'all. Watch a movie. If there had been anything that I had ever heard about Denzel Washington, it was the idea that he's actually cool as hell. You know what I mean? But, like, just.

[Langston Kerman]

He's just always been cool, man. He fucking. He's cool. He's just.

[David Borey]

Yeah, and.

[Langston Kerman]

And not. That doesn't imply. And I want to be careful when we say this. That also doesn't imply that he can't be queer and cool. He can be, but I just think the. The suggestion of this email is that it's nefarious, whatever he has going on. And I bet if Denzel is, in fact, doing the bending on an Amari Hardwick, it's just cool. It's. They all, man, they all agreed to it.

[David Borey]

If that was a part to add to his legacy, like, I bet you he was bending crazy ass in the 90s. If it was. If Denzel, at the height of Denzel was fucking dudes. It was top shelf, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

The run he had, man, because we never seen that before, where, like, the greatest actor on the planet is also the most handsome actor on the planet.

[David Borey]

Right?

[Langston Kerman]

Do you want to mean, like, usually it's like, oh, the greatest actor. But he's. He's funny looking. But that's part of his. His success, his charm. Even Marlon Brando wasn't like, he was, but he wasn't. You know what I mean? Like, it wasn't like that guy. It was just. He was just great at the shit. But Denzel was everything. He was fucking cool. He was talented. The most talented, man. And he could steal your girl. It was crazy.

[David Borey]

Or your guy.

[Langston Kerman]

Or your guy.

[David Borey]

Apparently, there's only one. There's only one, like, closeted black actor that I would think of that I'm like, I'd like to hear what his run was.

[Langston Kerman]

Who's that?

[David Borey]

Are we supposed to. Jamie Foxx.

[Langston Kerman]

Oh, okay. Yeah, that's what I figured. But, yeah, I don't. Listen, he's not booked next week. It's not like. It's not like we got him coming up.

[David Borey]

I would love to hear about what his run was because I bet he was going crazy.

[Langston Kerman]

Jamie Foxx had a great time. And I believe, and this is a credit to Jamie Foxx in his sort of queer experience is I believe that everything Jamie Foxx did was generally on the up and up. It just was private, if that makes sense.

[David Borey]

Right. I mean, I don't think definitely.

[Langston Kerman]

I think there's definitely. In this email in particular, there's sort of like this salacious nature that's being suggested that I don't think a Denzel, a Jamie Foxx, whoever. The guys that we've never heard anything bad about are participating in, I think they're truly just like, if you're down, hell yeah. And if you're not, my brother, enjoy the courts. You know what I mean? Like, it.

[David Borey]

Ain't you talking about nigga basketball.

[Langston Kerman]

I only. He's like, nigga, get your shit off. I'm trying to see your dick. If you don't play, you gotta get out. I think it's more like, hey, man, sometimes I like to take my shit off. And if you like to join me, then I'll know you're cooler than I thought you were. And if not, that's totally fine and you probably won't be at the next party. But I'm not mad at you. I love you. You're great.

[David Borey]

Right? Exactly. I mean, I think to all this. I mean, I think the problem is a lot of times people talk about, like, oh, gay sex has got to be this terrible thing. And I think it's just like two adults putting something in something.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I think that's real.

[David Borey]

And to that point, do I. Do I believe this? No. Do I think it would be fun if that was another chapter in Denzel's book?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, that'd be nice. I like that we found out right at the end that Quincy Jones was kind of gay. Yeah. Do you what I mean that, like, because he told everybody else's secrets. But, like, Quincy, you're hanging out at these parties with these people. You're not. Not participating. Right.

[David Borey]

Like, yeah, you're doing drugs at a party where everybody's fucking and you're just like, oh, crazy.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. They're not letting you keep hanging out if you ain't also dipping your toe in a little Marlon Brando. So, like, nah, we get it. You're Richard Pryor's. Crazier as an answer, but you also were fucking Marlon Brando. You know what I mean? Like, I get all of that, and I like that we found that out. And I wouldn't be mad if we found that out about a lot of our heroes, specifically Denzel, for sure.

[David Borey]

But that being said, do I believe this? No.

[Langston Kerman]

No, I don't believe that.

[David Borey]

It started out at the grocery store.

[Langston Kerman]

I think Denzel Washington, in a way that will always make him a hero to me, truly believes in the art form that he's committed his life to. I think he is more passionate about acting than most people will ever be about anything in their lives. And I think, in that way, he is an inspiration. Where you go, like, damn, if I could learn to love my shit this much, if I can really invest this much of myself into the thing that I'm passionate about, maybe I could be half as great as this dude is at entertainment. So I believe that he invited those men to stay in his home because he saw their potential and wanted to help them foster that more than I believe he wanted Chadwick Boseman's butt.

[David Borey]

Yeah, I don't think there was any kind of entanglement with that younger person he invited to him. I think it was altruistic.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I think, if anything, he was probably waking them up at weird hours so that they could recite fucking Shakespearean monologues and shit, like, oh, like an acting boot camp. I think he was probably whooping they ass with, like, nigga, if you gonna stay in my house, you gonna get good at crying on cue.

[David Borey]

Right? Like, he busts in on him in the bathroom, like, do Death of a Salesman.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, they're spitting. They're spitting history. Like, they're pledging a fraternity. You know what I mean? Like, they're fucking. They're any.

[David Borey]

Yeah, I like that.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

I think, Brother Washington, sir.

[Langston Kerman]

I think.

[David Borey]

And they're all better for it.

[Langston Kerman]

They're all better for it, which is why they also don't talk about them staying at his house. You know what I mean? Like, I think it really is a fraternal thing where you'll bring it up. He'll be like, oh, yeah, I stay with Denzel for a minute. But it ain't. It ain't fond memories. He whooped our asses. And I know he made me better, but I don't know that I like that, nigga.

[David Borey]

I like that. I want that to. I want him to be that's. Man, I hope that's his enduring legacy.

[Langston Kerman]

I do, too. That'd be really sweet if we remember Denise Washington as the Kobe Bryant of acting.

[David Borey]

And, and if it is some gay shit, I hope he was running through ass.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I hope he took down some of our biggest and baddest. That's. That's fair.

[David Borey]

Yeah, I like that. I think. I think we came to a good point on this.

[Langston Kerman]

We. I think we should take a break. I know this is going to sound crazy. We should take a break because we owe one. But also because I have a question that I want us to unpack and I think this is the best place to do it. It's a question regarding Drake that I just want to present and get your take on before we're done on this episode.

[David Borey]

All right, let's do it.

[Langston Kerman]

All right. So we're going to take a break. We'll be back with more lengths to. More David, more. Mama told me. Okay, bacon lovers. And I know you're out there. Let me tell you something amazing about Oscar Meyer thick cut bacon. Now, I don't know if you've used the smoker before, but it's a real labor of love. You got to put in time to get that rich smoky flavor. So now think about this. Oscar Meyer smokes their bacon for 12 hours. That's half a day. Day. Twice as long as most bacon is smoked. So for that savory, smoky thick cut bacon, keep it Oscar.

[David Borey]

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[Langston Kerman]

That's the same amount of time Oscar Meyer smokes their delicious thick cut bacon. Yeah, while you're sleeping, Oscar Meyer is still smoking that bacon. Forget your mattress for thick cut bacon. You'll dream about. Keep it Oscar.

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[Langston Kerman]

My mama told Me Presents the Start the Steal Tour. We're very excited about it. Yes, I'm not about to bite my tongue. We want to sell it out and the dates are coming up fast and so if you live in one of these areas, we want you to buy your tickets now. It's all available on Our Instagrams, on our websites, on our link tree. December 12th, we're in Seattle. And December 15th, you're closing it out in Portland, Oregon. We want y'all to come out. We want y'all to kick it. We will be doing our coveted live show with special guests with just me and David depending on the city. It'll be a great time.

[David Borey]

All that meet and greets. You think Chris Brown has a good.

[Langston Kerman]

Meet and greet, bro? Let's be clear. I'll take a weird picture with you for free. Oh, God, it's so good.

[David Borey]

Mmm.

[Langston Kerman]

Mmm.

[David Borey]

So good.

[Unknown Advertiser]

Mmm.

[David Borey]

So good and tasty. We're back. We're back with Langston. Has a burning question to ask about one Aubrey Graham. Toronto's finest.

[Langston Kerman]

Toronto's finest. So he says, who knows where this nigga's from? Actually, my question, and this is one I've been wrestling with for a few days now. Drake obviously lost this battle. He's in a bad way. He's now presented two different forms of litigation to the public courts to demand some justice around the diss track that has upended his life. He's released, I. It is my understanding, upwards of 19 songs since the. The feud started, and none of them have gotten any traction. He's in a bad way. Right? We. We can all recognize the hurt. He cut his hair, he's balding. It's all bad. None of this is going good. But my question for you is if Drake dropped the equivalent of passion fruit today, could he find his way back?

[David Borey]

I think that if Drake dropped the equivalent of passion fruit today, I think all. I think that he does not get the core of hip hop back, even though it's kind of notably a fickle fan base. I think he's kind of maybe done too much damage within that. But do I think he could still be in International Pop Star? Yeah. Yeah. I do think he could come back in that way.

[Langston Kerman]

That's my feeling, too. I think he's. I think he's pretty unbeatable in that way where like, this motherfucker gave us a lot, a lot, a lot of hits. And it's not like anybody believed he was a killer to begin with. See what I mean?

[David Borey]

Exactly.

[Langston Kerman]

We've spent his whole career being like, Drake, you bitch, you soft. That was the bitch.

[David Borey]

That was the main argument for the guy the whole time. Like, he never. I think maybe in his mind, and maybe it's because he's surrounded by sycophants or something like that. I think maybe he thinks that he ditched that sort of Persona or that era around him. He never did. That's always what it was. No one ever believed Mob ties or whatever the fuck he's talking about. So in that the fans who want to live listen to that. Yeah, I think that they. I think that. I think that they come back. I mean, it's in the same way. Because if that was the case, if the fans cared about him getting beaten that way, I think Adidon would have done actual damage. And it didn't. No.

[Langston Kerman]

It did nothing but feed Twitter for a sustainable amount of time. Right. It gave us a. Some. Some Twitter things happen, and it's like a half a day and then some Twitter things happen, and it's like three weeks. And Drake gave us three weeks on Twitt. It was fucking. It was nuts.

[David Borey]

And I think to him, I think if you are surrounded with thinking that that is what the majority. What do you think? Drake got friends in Brazil, bro. You think they really care, you think if he just dropped an Australian tour and the shit's going like. You know what I'm saying? People don't. I don't think.

[Langston Kerman]

But on the flip side, I don't think he wants to be David Hasselhoff. Do you know what I mean? Like, he doesn't want to have to like, oh, I make my money overseas, but you should see the check as, dude. Like, I think he wants to still have the E ear of, you know, the American youth and shit. And I wonder. I still think that is possible. I guess it's a better way of saying it. I really do still think that. Our memories are short and our feelings about people are fickle. And Passion Fruit is arguably one of the greatest songs to ever exist, and there are ways for him to rediscover that. He's never going to be able to talk like a thug to us again, but I don't think he needs to. Like, I think he just can be. I gave.

[David Borey]

That was never where he was great anyways.

[Langston Kerman]

Right?

[David Borey]

And also, to be completely honest, I don't care that much anymore. You know what I mean? It was exciting when it happened. I don't know. This guy lost a fight three weeks ago. I got bills. I don't. Whatever. If he really just sat it out and been like, good one, Kendrick, and come back next summer, I don't think anybody would even care.

[Langston Kerman]

No, he really. He really fucked up bad. Sort of trying to defend himself in this. It wasn't necessary. He could have found his way back if he would have just chilled. And I think he made that lift 10 times harder by, like, trying to flex on this shit, you know what I mean? And he's still doing it. I think that, to me, is going to be the more undoing of Drake than. Than his inability to, like, make a great song and come back a winner. Like, I think he just. No, his ego is gonna keep getting in the way of his ability to do it correctly.

[David Borey]

I totally agree. I think if he had been a gracious loser, he could have avoided all of this. He keeps. I mean, I think it's. And maybe it's one of those things where it's like, you reap what you sow eventually. He kind of seems to have always been sort of a scumbag and it's now catching up to him. But I think that. Could he come back even with all this dumb shit he's doing now? Yeah, man. Pop fans are idiots. Somebody's quoted as saying that it's like, memories are short, I think. I think if he legitimately took a year off where we don't know where this dude is at, and then he just popped back up, he'd be fine.

[Langston Kerman]

And nobody wants to hear. Not like us right now. You know what I mean? Like, it.

[David Borey]

Yes.

[Langston Kerman]

That shit was banging and for the summer.

[David Borey]

Yeah, man. And it's just like. I don't think that. I don't think you can't.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

Like you said, you can't really kill something that is as big as Drake is like that. You really can't. You really can't. But if he keeps sticking around doing dumb shit, maybe it's done. I don't think so.

[Langston Kerman]

I think he can only keep stabbing himself, but as soon as he figures out how to turn that sword around, he'll. He can find his way back.

[David Borey]

Agreed, man.

[Langston Kerman]

Which sucks.

[David Borey]

I want to be clear.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't. I don't. I don't want that type of figure to exist that's that unbeatable. I did genuinely enjoy this beef and was excited to see someone who I think we can all agree doesn't have the best personality be taken down a peg. That felt nice. That felt like human justice. Not a. Not a moral one, just a fucking. Like, yeah, that's what humanity's experience is supposed to be. And the idea that he's still going to be unbeatable makes me sad.

[David Borey]

I think that ultimately it comes down to like, yeah, do you. Life is not fair. Karma is not real. You know what I mean? It's like in Kendrick, winning felt almost karmic. Right? It felt. It Felt almost as if, yeah, this guy is the man of the people and the people are gonna win. I don't know if you've looked around, but people are not winning. Boy, they got his soda. You know, I, you know, so, yeah, I don't, I also don't know. I also don't know in the idea of Kendrick being a sucker or sort of taking the spot that Drake occupied. I don't think Kendrick wants to be outside that.

[Langston Kerman]

No.

[David Borey]

I feel like he's probably going to start to feel overexposed within all of this.

[Langston Kerman]

And I think to your point, part of Drake's value is that he wanted to be a celebrity the way that we crave a celebrity. I think to your point, at some point Kendrick's, Kendrick's outside energy is going to dry up and Drake's never would. And that's part of how you are able to become Drake. You gotta really never wanna sit down.

[David Borey]

You gotta be willing to want to be that. And that's a place most people, I don't think want to go because of. For sake of their humanity.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. But good for you, Aubrey, and good for you, Kendrick. We're proud of you both. For different reasons. We won't say which ones.

[David Borey]

And I love the Kendrick album. It was cool. I just don't. I can't. I have a hard time. I noticed with that last beef. I just am like, I'm just not that invested in these things anymore. You know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

I like it for the, for the jokes. I don't give a fuck. On a person to person level, I go like, these are grown men. This is all silly.

[David Borey]

Same man. Or even on a, like a cultural, like, I don't know, man. I just like, I just found myself like less and less invested as it went on and now it's only a few months later and I truly don't care anymore. Yeah, I mean, the bad things Drake did, though, those are things that there should be a reckoning for. I don't want it to sound like that.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I think if any of the accusations that I've heard that you've heard are true, then there should be some responsibility met for all of that. But that ain't got nothing to do with rat beef. That's got something to do with a bunch of personal bad behavior that a lot of people were probably witnessed to and comfortable with as long as he was making them money.

[David Borey]

Facts.

[Langston Kerman]

Anyway, you want to tell the people where they can find you and what cool shit you got.

[David Borey]

Bleak, you can listen to my album Birth of a Nation starts with a G on all streaming platforms. Cool Guy Jokes 87 on Instagram patreon.com.

[Langston Kerman]

Davidborey Follow me at Langston Kerman on all social media platforms. Watch my special. It's called Bad Poetry. It's on Netflix. Watch English Teacher. You can stream that bad boy on Hulu. And if you want to send us your own drops, your own conspiracy theories. If you want to tell us which one of those 19 songs Drake has already dropped that is in fact equivalent to Passion fruit, send it all to mymamapodmail. If you want to leave us a voicemail, we've been getting a bunch of voicemails. We're going to start engaging with those fairly soon. Call us at 844-lITTLE MOMS. 844-LITTLE MOMS. That's where you can find us. And like subscribe. Buy the merch Rate Review Remember to recycle. Bye bitch.

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[David Borey]

Living in America. Motherfucking mini episode. Mini episode. Mini episode. Mini episode. Mini episode. Mini episode.

[Langston Kerman]

If you like bacon, you'll love Oscar Meyer thick cut bacon. It's smoked for 12 hours. That's a really long time. So for the delicious smoky flavor, keep it Oscar, baby.

[David Borey]

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[Langston Kerman]

12 hours of Oscar Meyer smoking thick cut bacon for half the day, they're still smoking that bacon. If you're driven by your love of smoky thick cut bacon, keep it Oscar. If you've got a plan to eat smoky thick cut bacon, keep it Oscar.

[Unknown Comedian]

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