NBA Magic Tricks (with Josiah Johnson)

Summary

Podcast Summary: "NBA Magic Tricks (with Josiah Johnson)"

Title: NBA Magic Tricks
Host: Big Money Players Network and iHeartPodcasts
Guest: Josiah Johnson
Release Date: June 3, 2025

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Introduction to the Episode
In this episode of "My Mama Told Me," hosts Langston Kerman and David Borey delve into intriguing NBA conspiracy theories with special guest Josiah Johnson. The discussion centers around the alleged rigging of the NBA draft, particularly focusing on the 1985 draft, and explores how such manipulations might influence team compositions and league dynamics.

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Segment 1: The 1985 NBA Draft Conspiracy
Josiah Johnson initiates the conversation by presenting the core conspiracy theory: the 1985 NBA Draft was manipulated to favor certain teams unfairly. He argues that the selection process, especially the lottery system introduced in 1985, lacks transparency and may be susceptible to undue influence.

• Quote:
  David Borey: “[11:09] They didn't.”
  Josiah Johnson: “[11:09] Every time we put credential requests out... your credential's been denied.”

Johnson explains how, despite being a passionate NBA fan and having a personal connection through his father who played in the NBA, his attempts to gain official credentials were consistently denied, suggesting favoritism within the league.

• Quote:
  Josiah Johnson: “[12:01] ...they show the video, and if you go through and watch it, they basically, like, have this big, like, tumble thing with all the different envelopes in it…”

This refers to the draft lottery process, where Johnson posits that the selection was manipulated to favor the New York Knicks in acquiring Patrick Ewing, contrasting it with the randomness that should characterize such a system.

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Segment 2: Modern Implications and Recent Trades
The conversation shifts to contemporary issues, including recent trades by the Dallas Mavericks, notably the controversial trade involving Luka Dončić. Johnson questions the rationale behind such moves, especially when it seemingly benefits power dynamics rather than fostering competitive balance.

• Quote:
  Josiah Johnson: “[24:37] ...this is just some fucked up shit going on.”

He likens the improbability of certain trades to "magic tricks," suggesting that the outcome defies statistical likelihood and hints at deeper manipulation within the league's operations.

Langston and David engage by sharing personal anecdotes and perspectives on team management and fan experiences, emphasizing the emotional and financial investments tied to such conspiracies.

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Segment 3: The Role of Lawyers and Entertainment in the NBA
Johnson draws parallels between the NBA and entertainment industries like wrestling, highlighting the legal influence on the league's operations. He suggests that the NBA’s classification as an entertainment entity grants it more flexibility and possibly the means to manipulate outcomes without public scrutiny.

• Quote:
  Josiah Johnson: “[17:49] ...they hired a very powerful lawyer.”

He references former Commissioner David Stern and current Commissioner Adam Silver’s backgrounds in law, implying that their legal expertise might contribute to behind-the-scenes manipulations.

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Segment 4: Player Conduct and League Policies
The discussion transitions to player behavior and the league's disciplinary actions. Johnson critiques how suspensions are handled, citing cases like Ja Morant's gun incident and the differing consequences for various players.

• Quote:
  Josiah Johnson: “[18:55] So that's what it ended up becoming. But if you go back to why he initially got suspended...”

He argues that the league's responses are inconsistent and possibly influenced by internal agendas, undermining the integrity of disciplinary measures.

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Segment 5: Media Influence and Narrative Control
Kerman and Borey explore how the NBA controls narratives through media interactions, shaping public perception of teams and players. Johnson emphasizes the league’s strategic communication to maintain certain images and stories that benefit its overarching interests.

• Quote:
  Langston Kerman: “[49:24] ...they ultimately are weaving the story with the intention of just selling you the best story.”

This segment underscores the potential for the league to prioritize entertainment value over genuine competition, blurring the lines between sports and scripted entertainment.

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Segment 6: The Future of the NBA and Competitive Balance
In concluding discussions, the hosts and Johnson ponder the future implications of these conspiracy theories on the NBA's competitive balance. They debate whether the league’s practices foster genuine talent development or merely sustain a controlled competitive environment.

• Quote:
  Josiah Johnson: “[55:40] ...you literally telling me a team that has championship level aspirations, trades away their franchise guy…”

This reflects ongoing concerns about team strategies that may prioritize financial or entertainment gains over building competitive rosters, potentially disadvantaging teams striving for authentic success.

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Conclusion and Final Thoughts
The episode wraps up with a consensus among the participants that while the NBA presents itself as a fair and competitive league, underlying conspiracies may be at play to preserve its financial and entertainment interests. The conversation leaves listeners pondering the true nature of professional sports leagues and the extent of their influence over the games we watch.

• Quote:
  Langston Kerman: “[49:50] ...the NBA is going to continue to rig our league we love so much.”

The hosts encourage listeners to critically evaluate the structures of professional sports and remain vigilant about the potential manipulations within.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• [11:09] David Borey: "They didn't."
• [12:01] Josiah Johnson: "They show the video, and if you go through and watch it, they basically, like, have this big, like, tumble thing with all the different envelopes in it…"
• [17:49] Josiah Johnson: "Their whole crew was all lawyers..."
• [18:55] Josiah Johnson: "So that's what it ended up becoming. But if you go back to why he initially got suspended..."
• [49:24] Langston Kerman: "They ultimately are weaving the story with the intention of just selling you the best story."
• [55:40] Josiah Johnson: "You literally telling me a team that has championship level aspirations, trades away their franchise guy..."

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Final Remarks
“My Mama Told Me” offers an engaging and thought-provoking exploration of NBA conspiracy theories, blending personal anecdotes with critical analysis. Through dynamic discussions and insightful commentary, hosts Langston Kerman and David Borey, alongside Josiah Johnson, challenge listeners to reconsider the narratives presented by professional sports leagues.

For more episodes and in-depth discussions, tune in to "My Mama Told Me" on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or your preferred podcast platform.

Transcript

[Langston Kerman]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Holly Frye]

Explore the winding halls of historical true crime with Holly Frye and Maria Tremarchi, hosts of Criminalia, as they uncover curious cases from the past. The legend of the highwayman suggests men dominated the field, but tell that to Lady Catherine Ferrars, known as the wicked lady who terrorized England in the mid-1600s. Her legend persists nearly 400 years after her death. Highwaymen are in the hot seat this season. Find more crime and cocktails on Criminalia. Listen to criminalia on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Jake Hanrahan]

I'm Jake Hanrahan, journalist and documentary filmmaker. Away Days is my new project reporting on countercultures on the fringes of society all across the world. Live from the underground, you'll discover no rules fighting, Japanese street racing, Brazilian favela life, and much more. All real, complete, completely uncensored. Listen to the Away Days podcast, reporting from the underbelly on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Langston Kerman]

I just think wings take bet, taste better with. And that's in the air.

[David Borey]

Come on.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, it's just the aesthetic. Well, yeah, boy.

[David Borey]

No, now you're going crazy.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, I just think at the end of the day, that's the. You gotta remind them both.

[David Borey]

It's like a wine pairing, you know, it's like a wine and cheese pa where you're like, oh, yes. The notes of the subtle buffalo flavor bring out. It brings out the tannins in the pussy.

[Langston Kerman]

100%.

[David Borey]

Pussy tannins.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I think that's 100% what it is.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

I didn't have the words for it.

[David Borey]

No, no, no. It's like. I also think there's, like an element of the sweat in the air and then a little just a dash of desperation on the men's part.

[Langston Kerman]

And I would say the darkness, that nice darkness it puts on the wings where you see some titties and then you got search a little for the wing. It just makes it this romantic sort of experience.

[David Borey]

Oh, my God. I mean, man, I remember in San Francisco, they had this place and the Gold Club.

[Josiah Johnson]

Good lunches at the Gold Club. Shout out to. All my people out in San Francisco have not been. But they've told me good things about it. Oh, man.

[David Borey]

Shout out to. Got me through some tough times. The government growing babies.

[Langston Kerman]

Microchips in your anus. All koala bears are racist. The ozone player owes me money. Marshy's invented turkey stuffing.

[David Borey]

Y' all can't tell Me nothing. Basketball is my favorite sport. I like the way they dribble up and down the court. Welcome all mamas and gentiles alike, to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told.

[Langston Kerman]

Me, the podcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets of black conspiracy.

[David Borey]

Theories and we finally work to prove whatever bullshit we feel about talking today. I said about talking. And it doesn't matter because I listen anyways. You little pig.

[Langston Kerman]

I wasn't gonna correct your sentence at all.

[David Borey]

I know. It was just on me. I felt bad.

[Langston Kerman]

You could feel that that's not the way you wanted to say it.

[David Borey]

I immediately. You know what I've been thinking about, though? This is what I came in. I wanted to talk about.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

Those little robots that they have all over la. I took a walk this morning. I realized I think they make them look so cute and dispatch them in the morning because they want you to think about little kids on their way to school and feel like they're innocuous because I was looking at it and it's just so cute. And it's like it stops. It looks like a kid with a big ass backpack and big ass glasses walking to school. And they want you to think that so that you don't understand that's the enemy.

[Langston Kerman]

So that you.

[Josiah Johnson]

You want to protect them.

[David Borey]

That's. It was so cute when I was walking, that's all I kept thinking I was like this cute little robot.

[Langston Kerman]

I want to keep him safe.

[David Borey]

Yeah. Look at his big robot eyes.

[Josiah Johnson]

He got to stop.

[David Borey]

He can't.

[Josiah Johnson]

You wobbling.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

And that's not. We need ugly robots, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

I like that.

[David Borey]

I think that is like. That's the future is like we need laws that robots have to be.

[Langston Kerman]

That is crazy that when they start building sort of these humanoid robots and they've already, you know, had versions of these things happen. They always make them baddies. They don't never make them some little ugly ghoul. That is probably frankly more common in the human experience.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yep.

[Langston Kerman]

Than the baddies are.

[David Borey]

Doc, I'm telling you, they want you to fuck them. They want you to think they're cute. They want you to try. Want to protect like. They don't want like. Bro, if you get a robot that just looks like a manager at a Sally's beauty supply.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

You're not going to. You're not going to feel any way towards it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. Give me that. Sam. Sam Cassell robot, bro.

[Josiah Johnson]

Damn. Sam Cassell catches crazy already. He ain't doing that. He mind his business.

[Langston Kerman]

No, he knows.

[Josiah Johnson]

Sam don't listen to this episode.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm not saying anything.

[Josiah Johnson]

You don't know, but I'm sure he knows by now. But he doesn't care. I think he's had time to.

[Langston Kerman]

No, he's all right. He ain't worried about what I'm talking about. I'm just saying that's what we should be looking at.

[David Borey]

We should be looking at. And I do want it known just for the listenership. I like ugly people better. I do think that's cooler. I think it's like a greater distance to travel to be successful, especially in media and entertainment if you are ugly.

[Langston Kerman]

Wow.

[David Borey]

I really don't respect really beautiful people that much.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay. Yeah. I don't, I don't fully disagree with that.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

Easier life for sure.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, yeah.

[David Borey]

That's what I'm saying.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't, I don't. There's no part of me that pushes back on that.

[David Borey]

No. Okay.

[Josiah Johnson]

Ugly people don't get privilege.

[David Borey]

Ugly people, they get it out every ugly person, bro. You don't really see ugly people in positions of power who are bad at shit. You know what I'm saying? You don't see a lot of ugly ass bosses who don't run the shit out of that star. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's real.

[David Borey]

And that's like, I think that's, like, admirable.

[Josiah Johnson]

You know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

Wow. Damn. Elon ugly.

[David Borey]

Ooh. Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Very effective.

[David Borey]

Very effective.

[Langston Kerman]

Arguably the most ever effective person.

[David Borey]

I don't think he's butt ugly, though. I think he's quirky looking. Elon's not butt ugly.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, but he's got cheeks.

[Josiah Johnson]

Lot of work done.

[Langston Kerman]

He's like, worked really hard to get to this.

[David Borey]

That's true. PayPal. Elon Musk is bad looking. I, I think, like, bad hair.

[Langston Kerman]

I think you're really underestimating how much we, we know for a fact this motherfucker went and like, tried to fix it.

[David Borey]

I mean, listen, there's short guys in the NBA, bro. I'm not saying this is like, it's not a perfect.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

I'm not saying it's like people define the odds every day. I'm just saying in general, man, I, I, man, we need to go back. We need to have, like, ugly presidents. I think we need, like, we need more ugly people.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't, I don't disagree with you. I, I, Our guest today, you've already heard his voice. He's already been participating in this.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm enjoying the show.

[Langston Kerman]

We're not gonna, that's what we don't want it to be. We came here. We came here to have very important conversations.

[Josiah Johnson]

Okay?

[Langston Kerman]

A la this conspiracy you brought to us. And so I. We're very excited you're here. He's. He's the goddamn king of what was formerly known as Twitter. You know him from. From his new film, Memes and Nightmares. You. And most importantly, no Chill with Gilbert Arenas. He's hilarious. He's so talented. Give it up for Josiah Johnson.

[Josiah Johnson]

Everybody.

[Langston Kerman]

Get on up.

[David Borey]

It's foul play time.

[Josiah Johnson]

Cool running. Shout out to everybody who watches Gills Arena. Presented by underdog Wil Whoop. Trying to get this bag. Always get it in. Keep the sponsor happy. Get it in every day of the week.

[David Borey]

We should start doing that for sponsors we want. Yeah, yeah. Shout out to dxl, the number one choice in plus size men's clothing.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[Josiah Johnson]

Very quality clothing.

[David Borey]

Yeah, it's good stuff. Cause you're on the tall side, which you already know. We never think about that, to be honest.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm dxl Kohl's. Like, I only got like three or four places I can stop at.

[David Borey]

Wow. It's like, I think being a fat guy in those stores, you start to think the tall guys are a myth.

[Josiah Johnson]

No. Yeah. You got the big section and the tall section. They work together in perfect harmony. Big and tall.

[David Borey]

Okay. So you got the T on the end of your shirt.

[Josiah Johnson]

Oh, for sure.

[David Borey]

Wow. Wow. I thought that. I didn't even know what that was for.

[Langston Kerman]

You thought they were just doing that to keep y' all comfortable?

[David Borey]

I thought it was to make you feel better. You're like.

[Josiah Johnson]

No.

[David Borey]

Tall guys go.

[Langston Kerman]

Like when somebody call you big man.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

And like.

[Langston Kerman]

Come on. There's only one reason you're saying that.

[David Borey]

Yeah. It's not tall.

[Langston Kerman]

That's not cool. Cause you're just. Yeah. All right.

[David Borey]

Anyways, you got a plug you want to do like you should. We should manifest plugs.

[Langston Kerman]

I think that's a good idea. Do I have a plug?

[David Borey]

You gotta have the thing that you want.

[Langston Kerman]

I feel like, yeah, probably, but then it feels like it gets embarrassing very quickly. Oh, really?

[David Borey]

Just be open.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay. Crunchyroll. I really want you to give us free pass words to country roll so I can watch anime all day.

[Josiah Johnson]

Okay. Ain't nothing wrong with that.

[David Borey]

No, I knew you was gonna like it.

[Josiah Johnson]

He blew it.

[Langston Kerman]

I knew you were gonna be mad at me. That's why I didn't want to do it. I knew the only answer I had was honest. It wasn't like a good joke, so.

[Josiah Johnson]

No, that was Good.

[Langston Kerman]

Nah, man, I just want to be able to watch anime and fucking nerd out all day.

[David Borey]

That's good, man.

[Langston Kerman]

Nah, I'm sorry.

[David Borey]

Well, anyways, yeah, you have a aspirational plug. You already got your real.

[Josiah Johnson]

I like basic shit. Snapple.

[Langston Kerman]

Like, Snapple.

[Josiah Johnson]

Things that are functional. Things that I like to use and drink around the house. So Snapple. I'm a big Celsius fan, so shout out Celsius. Taking Celsius every day before the show in the water.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[Josiah Johnson]

So some of my castmates get mad at me, say it's bad for you. I say, look, I ain't going to live forever. Come on, let me enjoy it. Let me enjoy my day.

[Langston Kerman]

His heart's going to explode at some point.

[Josiah Johnson]

10 calories, tons of energy. Shout out Celsius.

[Langston Kerman]

Shout out salsa.

[David Borey]

Yeah. And Crunchyroll.

[Josiah Johnson]

Crunchyroll for the anime.

[Langston Kerman]

Don't you be mad at me.

[David Borey]

I'm having a good time.

[Langston Kerman]

Josiah, you came to us today with a conspiracy that I frankly knew about but had never put a lot of thought into. You know, it's one of those that I think is rumored in such a way that it's like, oh, I don't know how to unpack the truth and not truth from this. But you said that my mama told me the 1985 NBA Draft was rigged.

[Josiah Johnson]

Let me use the words wisely, because I'm hoping to get credentialed by the NBA someday. Like, they used to call me the king of NBA Twitter. That wasn't very fruitful in actually getting any love from the league. Still having my own tickets. Yeah, they didn't.

[David Borey]

They didn't.

[Josiah Johnson]

Every. Every time. So we put credential requests out, and literally at this point, it's like two or three days a week before the event. So let's say it's all star weekend, summer league, whatever it is. Your credential's been denied. And I'm like, damn. But I see all the people that are there, and I know I'm working hard for the league, but I'm a big NBA fan. I love the league. My dad played in the NBA back in the day. And for me, it's like you look at leagues like the NFL, right? You're the worst team in the NFL. You get the number one pick, as it should be. You have the worst record. You deserve to have. So the NBA has always had this, like, ping pong lottery, like, as of, you know, I think 80s is when it first started. But they tell this story back in the day. David Stern obviously Knicks, you know, Patrick Ewing coming out of Georgetown.

[David Borey]

And a New Yorker, David Stern, which is important.

[Josiah Johnson]

And a New Yorker, Patrick Ewing, if I'm not mistaken.

[David Borey]

Is he from New York?

[Langston Kerman]

He's from Boston, I think, but then. Then went to New York, if I'm.

[David Borey]

Not mistaken, by way of Jamaica.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, he's from Jamaica.

[Langston Kerman]

He's Jamaican.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm getting Jamaican, Jamaica, Queens, confused. But now shout out. Shout out to Patrick Ewing, but number one player in college at that point. So they show the video, and if you go through and watch it, they basically, like, have this big, like, tumble thing with all the different envelopes in it, Right. So they spin it a couple times, but you see him kind of reach in there, feel around, and there was always saying the envelope was frozen or it was a little bit lighter. There was something going on. He just happens to. To yank it out. Hey, I'm not looking, but hey, yank it out here. The New York Knicks get the number one pick, and they get. End up getting Patrick Ewing, obviously. And you talk about the league that even nowadays with viewership issues and even stuff we saw in contemporary draft lottery times, like the one that was recent, it always seems to work out that way. You got LeBron James coming out of high school, Akron, Ohio. What do you know? Cleveland Cavs get the number one pick.

[David Borey]

Derrick Rose, as a Denver Perk native. Not a great time for me.

[Langston Kerman]

Oh, you. You thought you had a shot.

[David Borey]

I thought we had a sh. I thought.

[Josiah Johnson]

I was like, man, yeah, I didn't get mellow, so. Shit. I mean, yeah, it was cool, but.

[David Borey]

Like, I was like, we're getting new jerseys. We're getting LeBron.

[Langston Kerman]

You know what's crazy? I never thought anyone else had a shot.

[David Borey]

I mean. Cause you weren't number two, though.

[Langston Kerman]

That's fair.

[David Borey]

You know what I mean? Right, right, right. It was. I feel like it was like we were close enough that it was like, no, this could really, really happen.

[Langston Kerman]

Right. You really believed in the possibility of what this could be.

[David Borey]

And then I was like, it's gonna. We're going to have some great colorway that's coming out, too. I was like, the city's going to change. And then they hit us with sky blue.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. That was a bad run, brother.

[David Borey]

It was, bro. You know, it's like. It's like the way my heart sank when I saw it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

And I just like, oh, man, that shit was really upsetting because baby blue is a terrible color, especially for fat guys.

[Josiah Johnson]

It's not.

[David Borey]

Yeah, it's not good.

[Josiah Johnson]

It's not flattering.

[David Borey]

It's not flattering at all. It's like black.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's it.

[David Borey]

Come on. And then it's like you had a jersey that could make a guy like Kenyon Martin not look cool.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, no, it was impressive.

[David Borey]

That's work. That's work.

[Josiah Johnson]

They were really trying to watch this.

[David Borey]

Oh, man. Man. Shout out.

[Josiah Johnson]

You look cool and everything.

[David Borey]

Top tier Doug to me.

[Josiah Johnson]

Legend.

[Langston Kerman]

So you, obviously you're a kid at this point when.

[Josiah Johnson]

Oh, I'm three years old when this.

[Langston Kerman]

You're three years old when this happening.

[Josiah Johnson]

So you're not born 82, obviously draft 85.

[Langston Kerman]

You're. You're, you're not aware that this is happening. At what point does this get on your radar?

[Josiah Johnson]

Well, when you just see over the years how convenient it is even now. 2025, Mavs trade Luca to kick off Black History Month. Bring him to the Lakers. God bless Nico Harrison. Nico gets a lot of heat. Most hated person in the league. They booing him at medieval times.

[Langston Kerman]

He's got a brand new meme just eating him alive.

[Josiah Johnson]

He looked like Jafar from Aladdin with the grill. But so Trey Luca away for seemingly not a ton of return, right? No disrespect to Anthony Davis or Max Christie or one first round draft pick, but we've seen Rudy Gobert go for five, six first round. We saw Mikhail Bridges go to the Knicks for five first rounders. Luka, generational talent, you know what I mean? All NBA, perennial first team. All NBA. We getting crazy. Max Christie and a first round pick. We thought it was highway robbery.

[Langston Kerman]

And Anthony Davis, that don't look even close to the Anthony Davies. He get dreamt about.

[Josiah Johnson]

He gets hurt. I think before that came back, got hurt. But then they end up going. They make the play in, win their first game and it's like. And you know, I do the show with Gil and Gil the whole time, like, what the fuck are y' all doing, man? Like, you have a chance to now build through the draft. Like, why would you ever want to go to the playoffs? End up. I think they would have got the AFC and end up getting swept by the Thunder. You're not going to do anything. So his whole thing, and I agree, is like, if you're not gonna win the championship, there's like four or five teams every year that are trying to win a championship. If you're not trying to win a championship, you might as well not tank it. But not just give your best effort. Whatever. Whatever's in between there.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, it feels. It feels crazy. That the playoff team got the pick.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Like, not, like, objectively. That feels nuts. Where, like, we historically don't ever see that. Of, like, you went to the playoffs and you still get the best one.

[David Borey]

That seems. It just doesn't. It's not like a. But it's not like a fair situation.

[Josiah Johnson]

It's some bullshit. I think they were 11th overall of the 14 lottery teams in terms of. I think it was like 1.8% chance of getting that pick. Meanwhile, you got the Hornets, who are trash. You got the Jazz, who are trash. You got the Wizards, who are absolutely trash.

[Langston Kerman]

Don't forget about the Chicago Bulls. We're always rooting for them, baby.

[Josiah Johnson]

The Bulls got it, man. That giddy shot still haunts me, man. Watching that. We do a worker's company playback, so we stream live games. So we're doing that game, going crazy, thinking, the Lakers gonna win. Motherfucker hits a half quarter, and it's just like, damn. But the Bulls getting screwed. I think it's the second time, if I'm not mistaken. So I want to say the Bulls and the Mavs had the same record, so it was basically a coin flip to see who got that 11 spot. That 11 spot ends up getting the number one overall pick. Bulls get kind of screwed out of it. I want to say. Second time it happened with them in the Mavs. I think the last time Mav drafted Luca. So it's kind of, you know, some fucked up shit going on.

[David Borey]

Here's my question. I feel like we open it up and we just say it. I feel like we've talked about it a lot on this podcast. How rigged do you think the NBA is? I mean, that's what we're beating around the bush, right?

[Josiah Johnson]

The NBA is entertainment. So the NBA, similar to wrestling, entertainment, they don't really classify themselves as a sports league. We do. But I think, you know, when you.

[David Borey]

Get to the Nadia, you think they don't classify.

[Josiah Johnson]

I think they do it entertainment because it gives them a little bit more leeway and flexibility in terms of how they operate from behind the scenes.

[David Borey]

That's sketchy as fuck.

[Josiah Johnson]

It's entertainment, right? It's there to entertain.

[Langston Kerman]

That's like lawyer talk. They hired a very powerful lawyer.

[Josiah Johnson]

Their whole crew was all lawyers. David Stern, back in the day, like, successful lawyer, I believe, worked for the league before he ended up becoming commissioner. I want to say Adam Silver followed a similar trajectory.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, they weren't hooping, I'll tell you that.

[Josiah Johnson]

No. Jumpers.

[Holly Frye]

No.

[David Borey]

Come on.

[Josiah Johnson]

Jumpers. Bench. Come on.

[David Borey]

Come on.

[Josiah Johnson]

And for those who know, neither one.

[Langston Kerman]

Of them boys put a ball on the court, not once.

[Josiah Johnson]

You talk about behind the scenes shit. Like, you know, Strong army. You know, Gil's got his doc out on Netflix now. Untold Shooting Guards.

[David Borey]

We were just watching. I was just talking to him, talking.

[Josiah Johnson]

About it yesterday, and something he said. And I have no problem. I'm telling everybody on your show. But he said repeatedly, it was like, gil is a loophole expert, right? So Gil should have been a lawyer.

[David Borey]

I could really see that.

[Josiah Johnson]

So before he brought guns to the locker room, he researched. All right, what's the longest I can get suspended? It's like, all right, you know, Player X brought it in. He got two games. This player shot a gun. He got three games. He's like, shit, the most I'm gonna get is five for doing this.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm say, this. That's maniacal.

[Josiah Johnson]

But this is how he operates in life.

[Langston Kerman]

I thought it was more he was just being a silly billy. He's like, no, I'm going to make sure I extreme thought put into everything.

[Josiah Johnson]

So I'm like, most. I get his five games. I'm gonna do it. That's how his mind works.

[David Borey]

Even in the doc, he says the reason he felt like he got punished is because they knew he was moving guns around, right?

[Josiah Johnson]

So that's what it ended up becoming. But if you go back to why he initially got suspended, it wasn't because the guns in the locker room, because they can never prove anything, right? This thing came out like a week or two after the fact. It was kind of just going around the locker room. Somebody ended up snitching to the press. And then it went crazy. But that's all these dudes. And you guys know, like, we might have a situation here. We want to fight each other, whatever. Now we're cool. But a week from now, we here, you know, we've moved on. We passed it, right? Everybody now is like, man, we just heard about that shit that went down. It's like, huh? Yeah, I forgot all about that. Oh, yeah, I did bring guns in the locker room, man. I'm tripping. But you watched the dog.

[David Borey]

It is not that kind of environment here, though. It would be crazy. It would fuck us up.

[Josiah Johnson]

Oh, it'd be awful. The energy would be fucking up.

[David Borey]

If Flexon brought two guns and put on the couch and said, pick one.

[Langston Kerman]

I'd tell on all y' all niggas immediately.

[Josiah Johnson]

But then you dig deeper. And that's even the situation with Ja. Like, Ja didn't really get jammed up for the gun in the strip club, right? It was more like, well, how'd the gun get there? And, oh, really? So how did you. How did you.

[Langston Kerman]

What's the relationship?

[Josiah Johnson]

Did you bring that on On a team, playing on a team bus? Because now it becomes something deeper. But Gil didn't get suspended for the guns. He got suspended because he was in warmups, fucking around, and he did the finger guns. And then David Stern saw that and was like, all right, dog. Like, I'm about to strong arm your ass.

[David Borey]

That is.

[Josiah Johnson]

That is one way or the other.

[David Borey]

That is a crazy thing to do, though, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

I think what makes it nasty, though, is the fact that they can't prove it, right? Like, especially with the Ja situation. Because what they told us via the media was that he was bringing the guns into the locker room and onto the plane. But they don't know that for a.

[Josiah Johnson]

Fact unless he says, I did it, which I don't think he's done.

[Langston Kerman]

But. But the point being, it's not like he got on the plane and was like, hey, y' all, look at my gun.

[Josiah Johnson]

He's in a strip club. Tons of ones on the ground holding a noisy cricket in Colorado, which is, I believe, an open carry state.

[David Borey]

Okay. So I was gonna say about the Josh situation, wrong. Strip club. You go to Dandy Dan's. That doesn't happen to you, brother. So many guns in there. Yeah. You go up off the Federal, they'll let you, like.

[Josiah Johnson]

It's called Shotgun Willys, though. So, like, he should have been home to Shotgun.

[David Borey]

It's like trash. You only go there. They got steak on Tuesdays. That's all they got going.

[Josiah Johnson]

Good. Well, that's not a. That's. Yeah. I love a strip club that bounces as a culinary eatery. Shout out to Magic City. I've got the hot wings. Post made it to me, man.

[David Borey]

Honestly, if we're talking about ads, we want Magic City highways. Okay.

[Langston Kerman]

We're in agreement on this.

[David Borey]

That would be a good 100%.

[Langston Kerman]

We're in agreement.

[Josiah Johnson]

And you guys ate them there?

[David Borey]

No.

[Josiah Johnson]

Okay. Cause I got it. I was. I was doing some stuff with tnt. I was in Atlanta, got them postmated to the. To the hotel. Was not impressed when I. They were like, baby. I'm like, damn, what's going down? I think they gave me, like, the. The bottom of the barrel win.

[David Borey]

You gotta go in.

[Josiah Johnson]

You gotta come in on Monday.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

We need to take a break. But before we do, my question for you. Leading. I Guess into this break is what do you say to the issue of it being Dallas specifically? Because that is not a major market. It's not one that we've ever historically championed. Right. In terms of sinking the money into it. And more importantly, there's not that many incentives to make it good again if you just traded away Luca. So how do we justify that part?

[Josiah Johnson]

I think Dallas still top 10 market. If I'm not mistake.

[David Borey]

That's what I was gonna say. I think. I mean, I don't.

[Josiah Johnson]

It doesn't sound like it, but like. Because I thought the same thing, I'm like, yo, like, you know, we kind of look at the Mavs like they're a small market team, but top 10. Everything Mark Cuban came over to do. But Mark Cuban ends up selling the team, giving up control of basketball operations to Alderson family, who owns the Sam's Corp, who's heavy in gaming. So the initial rumor was they wanted to bring a casino to the arena. We're salty that. The state of Texas was kind of hating on that. The legislature wasn't letting it get through. So they're like, all right, well, fuck you. We trading the golden boy now. What? And we're gonna make bread either way. This franchise is gonna be valuable. Either way. You guys are gonna still come to games. Like we've seen before. Steve Ballmer took over the Clippers. He's done an amazing job. But Donald Sterling, my dad played for the Donald Sterling Clippers. Most embarrassing organization probably in the history of sports. Used to practice at the ymca. Played at the sports arena, like, well.

[David Borey]

Hey now, shout out to the ymca. Big YMCA guy. That's another. That's another.

[Langston Kerman]

You were there this morning?

[David Borey]

Yeah. No. Well, it was like, man, bro, is this. Uber was like 28 from your house to the YMCA. I couldn't justify it. I just got 10,000 steps in, came right on back.

[Josiah Johnson]

It makes it. But YMCA are great for common folk like us.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

Imagine your NBA team now just six, eight Common. We're just.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, just.

[David Borey]

Just three Common dudes over here.

[Josiah Johnson]

We're just three Common. But imagine your NBA team practicing and you got to leave because Pilates class is coming in or whatever the is going on.

[David Borey]

So you got a bunch of naked.

[Josiah Johnson]

Armenian dudes like, yo, you gotta go, dog. It's our time. I don't give a.

[David Borey]

Are they said he's not finished.

[Josiah Johnson]

Kawhi, get off the court.

[David Borey]

Yeah, they say they're not finished.

[Langston Kerman]

It's time to play.

[David Borey]

Bunch of dudes hooping in jeans half court.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, for sure. So the new. New management group comes in, new ownership group, end up making the trade for Luke. And like I said, we heard that trade. Everybody thought it was nuts. Everybody shout all over it. Nico, Harrison, myself included, you know, fire, Nico chants, all that stuff. But the Mavs had raised ticket prices after the Luca track.

[Langston Kerman]

Whoa.

[Josiah Johnson]

So it's like, really? So it's like, let me scratch my head here. Some shit's going on now. I'm not. I'm not gonna call the league out. There's been ton of people in the media who I respect to say, oh, no, this process just happens the way it is. But I think the percentage of the team. Three teams that got it, Mav, spurs and Sixers, we got the first three picks, was like 0.01% of that happening. Obviously much lower than the lottery. But even the Mavs winning, I think, is 1.8%. And we talked about this on the show. That'd be like me putting a stack of cards, saying, hey, pick the two of diamonds. And you just reaching in. Boop. Two of diamonds. Like the percentage of that potentially happening. So it's not.

[Langston Kerman]

That's nuts.

[David Borey]

The only way that happens is a magic trick. Trickery.

[Josiah Johnson]

It's convenient. I mean, I'm.

[Langston Kerman]

It's not 0%, but it's a silly number, close to 0%.

[Josiah Johnson]

So it's wild shit to see it actually happen. And now then be able to get Cooper Flagg, who's the great American white hope. Luca. European, of course, but one of my favorite Caucasians.

[Langston Kerman]

It's a finer replacement for that institution.

[Josiah Johnson]

We've got American Caucasian players, Cooper and Luca Whitey.

[David Borey]

I mean, if we have to qualify, I don't know, maybe this is because of the Nuggets thing. I kind of like the European whites better.

[Josiah Johnson]

Shout out Joker. Like the fat, sloppy look, don't look athletic, but come out, we'll cook.

[David Borey]

You got those scary. Running around my city. Even though he's. When he's gone, they just mashed.

[Josiah Johnson]

Have you seen them out and about, bro?

[David Borey]

I know a girl. I know somebody who lives in their building, and she was like. Like, he's gone. As soon as the season's over, they're just up there.

[Josiah Johnson]

They just chilling. They're just holding it down, making sure I know you don't know. Okay.

[David Borey]

Just lurking around.

[Langston Kerman]

I like that, man. I love that. They're like, man, we ain't going back there.

[Josiah Johnson]

We really run this city. Low key. We at the crib, not doing shit, fucking with the horses. We holding it down. We representing them.

[David Borey]

They are outside in tight, tight T shirts.

[Langston Kerman]

That's amazing. I love that. Good for them. Good for them. And frankly, good for the Dallas Mavericks.

[Josiah Johnson]

I think. Shout Out Dallas.

[Langston Kerman]

Y' all figured it out. Whatever the game was, you, you fucking mastered it perfectly. We're gonna take a break. We, we're gonna come right back with more Josiah Johnson. More My Mama told me.

[Gilbert Arenas]

We've all heard the stories. Missing persons, double lives, suspicious basements. But here's one mystery you don't need in your life. Why can't my kid learn to ride a bike? For a lot of families, it turns into a saga. Meltdowns in the driveway, scraped knees and frustrated parents Googling how to teach a kid to ride a bike without losing your mind. That's where Guardian Bikes comes in. Their bikes are lightweight, low to the ground, and built to help kids find their balance fast. Most are riding confidently in just one day. No training wheels, no tears, just high fives and I did it moments. It's everything. Learning to ride should be simple, smooth, and actually fun. So skip the struggle and start with a bike that's made to make it easy. Guardian bikes go to guardianbikes.com you'll save hundreds when comparing Guardian to its competitors. Plus get a free bike lock and pump a $50 value with your purchase when you join their newsletter. That's guardianbikes.com.

[Holly Frye]

Explore the winding halls of historical true crime with Holly Fry and Maria Tremarchi, hosts of Criminalia, as they uncover curious cases from the past. The legend of the highwayman suggests men dominated the field, but tell that to Lady Catherine Ferrers, known as the wicked lady who terrorized England in the mid-1600s. Her legend persists nearly 400 years after her death. Hear the story of the gentleman robber, the romantic darling of the ladies, and a tale about a wager over a sack of potatoes. But you'll have to tune in to learn who won that one. Some highwaymen were well mannered or faked it. People were concerned about the romanticism of robbers, but most were just thugs. Highwaymen are in the hot seat this season. Call them robbers or bandits, some are legendary figures. Listen to stories about historical crimes on Criminalia now, plus the cocktails and mocktails inspired by each. Listen to criminalia on the iHeartRadio app app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Jake Hanrahan]

I'm Jake Hanrahan, journalist and documentary filmmaker. Away Days is my new project reporting on countercultures on the fringes of society all across the world. Live from the underground, you'll discover no rules fighting, Japanese street racing, Brazilian favela life, and much more. All real, completely unsafe, censored. This is unique access with straightforward on the ground reporting. We're taking you deep into the dirt without the usual airs and graces of legacy media. A way that it showcases what the mainstream cannot access. Real underground reporting with real people. No excuses. For the past decade, I've been going to places I shouldn't be, meeting people I shouldn't know. Now, now you can come along, too. Listen to the Away Days podcast, reporting from the underbelly on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Langston Kerman]

We're not gonna let Joe Biden and Kamala Harris cut America's meat.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's dead on, Baton. That's dead on. That.

[David Borey]

And we're not going to let the NBA continue to rig our league we love so much.

[Josiah Johnson]

Keep doing it. I enjoy it.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't know if I want the alternative as much as I think I do.

[David Borey]

No, I mean, wrestling is as fun as any other thing. Right.

[Langston Kerman]

And it does create sort of this weird commitment to your teams in a way that. That actually makes the experience more meaningful, I would say.

[David Borey]

Right.

[Langston Kerman]

You know what I mean? That, like, when I remember as a kid, my favorite team growing up was that Sacramento team that almost did it. You know what I mean?

[Josiah Johnson]

And then you had Bibby and that crew. Paige, come on, man.

[Langston Kerman]

It was crazy.

[David Borey]

Shout out to Team Dime.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, that team was nuts.

[Josiah Johnson]

Team Dime. I got a funny story, actually. Yeah. So this tattoo. So one of my teammates at UCLA was Mike Bibby's cousin, Ryan Walcott, my guy. We still ride together to this day. So they used to have tattoo day, the Bibby family from Phoenix. So I happened to roll in during the off season. I think Mike was doing a camp or something. It was tatt. So I rolled up to the tattoo parlor. Mike Bibby bought me this. This one right here. The pitch Johnson, which is my last name, official last name. But he was like, yeah, you want a chat? I'm like, hell, yeah, Mike.

[David Borey]

Are those characters also saying pictures?

[Josiah Johnson]

No. So I got those when I was 18.

[David Borey]

No, I get it.

[Josiah Johnson]

But you're a Denver guy, so, you know, Marcus can't be like, the big Chinese symbols were the wave back then. I can't speak a lick of Chinese. Probably one of my biggest regrets in life, but I own it and I wear it like a badge of. No, it's supposed to say fear. No, man. But my Chinese friends are kind of like, ah, nigga. Not this time.

[Langston Kerman]

If I had to explain the embarrassment on my body.

[Josiah Johnson]

It was a cool thing to do in the early 2000s.

[Langston Kerman]

Ain't no shame in tattoo shaming. We don't do that over here.

[Josiah Johnson]

I believe Marcus can't be though. Marcus can be. You had the big ass Chinese symbols, you know, niggas had no connection to China whatsoever, bro.

[David Borey]

But it was really.

[Josiah Johnson]

China had us in a chokehold, which they still do. So maybe we saw the future.

[Langston Kerman]

That might be it from tariffs of.

[David Borey]

Artifacts, but I mean, I'm talking about like the Cisco era. There was a lot of dragons running around, man.

[Langston Kerman]

Jackie Chan had a cartoon.

[David Borey]

He did the Jackie Chan adventures.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. Y' all remember that?

[David Borey]

I do remember that. On channel on the wb.

[Langston Kerman]

It was like. It was like the. More like. It was like almost anime a little bit. It kind of had like a more advanced. Is this you cartoon?

[David Borey]

Are you leveraging for Crunchyroll again?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, Crunchyroll Holland, if you got that Jackie Chan cartoon, go ahead, let me watch it. I'm trying to watch it for free.

[Josiah Johnson]

Jackie Chan did run shit for a while. Yeah. Really?

[Langston Kerman]

Nah, he was going crazy.

[David Borey]

I was a big rumble in the Bronx guy. That was my Jackie Chan.

[Langston Kerman]

I will say, now that we're talking about it, then this is my conspiratorial brain really triggering. I do think they kind of gave Tom Cruise some of Jackie Chan shit.

[David Borey]

Whoa, wait, expand.

[Langston Kerman]

I think Jackie Chan really has been a I do my own stunts motherfucker for a long time.

[David Borey]

Cause he came from like the circus, right, or something like that.

[Langston Kerman]

Yes, I think he just came from karate.

[Josiah Johnson]

But he's like a classically tricky bad dude on that type of shit.

[David Borey]

Yeah, he's like classic. He's like trained in that.

[Langston Kerman]

But more importantly, he's a dude who's been cooking at that from the moment we met him.

[David Borey]

Right?

[Langston Kerman]

Tom Cruise went through like 15 evolutions.

[David Borey]

Before he became the ideal guy.

[Langston Kerman]

The guy who, like, truly did all his own stunts.

[David Borey]

Also, Tom Cruise couldn't. He couldn't share a bill with Chris Tucker. That would be a terrible movie.

[Langston Kerman]

You want to watch that back and forth?

[David Borey]

Rush Hour with Tom Cruise and Chris Tucker.

[Langston Kerman]

No, that stinks.

[David Borey]

Tom Cruise just calls him a slur movie over. Chris Tucker's like, don't touch my radio. He's like, what's your new one ever.

[Langston Kerman]

You goddamn ape? You think I want to listen to Cool Modine?

[David Borey]

Get out of here. Oh, man. Oh, that's hilarious.

[Langston Kerman]

No, I. I think they gave Jack. I think Jackie Chan.

[Josiah Johnson]

Tom Cruise said Fuck, I'm about to just take off. Wouldn't be the first time. Yeah, we've seen it colonized and gentrified.

[Langston Kerman]

Cause I don't think that Jackie Chan would be opposed to jumping out of a plane. You know what I mean? Like, I don't think he'd be scared to like bungee jump off of the fucking waterfall. Whatever.

[David Borey]

Here's my question.

[Langston Kerman]

They just were like, no, we'll fund Tom in all of this.

[David Borey]

Here's my question. In true gentrifier status, are the stunts Tom Cruise is doing more difficult than the shit that Jackie Chan was doing?

[Langston Kerman]

A hundred percent.

[Josiah Johnson]

You think so?

[David Borey]

I mean, the Jackie shit was like, I don't. I think one could go one way. I don't think the other could go. You know what I'm saying? Jackie was so athletic. I don't think that Jackie. Tom Cruise could do this shit. The Jackie Chan.

[Langston Kerman]

You're saying that. That it actually is much harder to get legit kicked in the face off of like a box tower than it is to, like, have this massive rig that ensures you won't actually ever get hurt. You just have to be brave enough to do the thing.

[David Borey]

When he jumped off the shit in Rumble in the Bronx and he broke his foot or whatever. Like, I just think that, like, I think the degree of difficulty line of business higher on Jackie Chan, for sure. Cause Jackie Chan's a proven, like, he's like, athletic.

[Langston Kerman]

He's a martial artist.

[David Borey]

It's not like Tom Cruise was like, oh, I was mad athletic and then I became a movie star. I think he's kind of just a guy.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Just alone.

[Josiah Johnson]

He trying to stay relevant. Death wish. No. I really want to die when this shit happens. I'm disappointed that y' all keep letting me down.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. And yeah, the church. The church doesn't. Doesn't approve of suicide. So I'll figure it out another way.

[Josiah Johnson]

Do it in a movie.

[David Borey]

Damn, that's dark. That's how he's about to check out Mission Impossible.

[Josiah Johnson]

Hey, it's too many Mission Impossible. I'll just say that too. Like, shit. At some point, all these missions are possible.

[David Borey]

You could do the missions.

[Josiah Johnson]

They're possible.

[David Borey]

You did eight of them. You could do it.

[Josiah Johnson]

These shits are possible.

[David Borey]

Be doing it. That's what you do.

[Langston Kerman]

Boys, I don't disagree with you on a logical sense, but they are strong films.

[Josiah Johnson]

They're good movies. But all these missions are very possible.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, difficult. They're very difficult, but possible.

[David Borey]

They should be hard ass missions.

[Langston Kerman]

Hard ass missions.

[Josiah Johnson]

They Gotta fuck up one time we didn't get it done.

[Langston Kerman]

There's all these conspiracies running around that Michael B. Jordan is about to be the replacement for the Ethan Hunt of the upcoming Mission Impossibles. And I wonder if they're gonna make that hard ass missions. Ooh, you know what I mean?

[David Borey]

Like, when it becomes black people.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

Yeah. This dumb as hell, y' all.

[Langston Kerman]

Oh, y' all gonna do that. All right. Couldn't be me. That's what it's gonna be.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, you got it. You got it.

[Langston Kerman]

Couldn't be me with Michael B. Jordan.

[David Borey]

I would rather have a black James Bond than a black Mission Impossible guy.

[Langston Kerman]

Oh, really?

[David Borey]

Yeah, I think it means. I think it means more.

[Langston Kerman]

Oh, I think they're just gonna really be so. You gotta remember British racism when they finally do it. It's that peer shit.

[David Borey]

That's true. That's uncut.

[Josiah Johnson]

Y' all is behind the ties here. Like everything else. We ran this way before. Y' all, please.

[Langston Kerman]

Nah, they. They give you that pure. And I don't like how that feels. And I don't want to see that happen to Idris or whoever is like.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, that shit is wild. You guys been out there before?

[David Borey]

Yeah, I've only been out there once.

[Josiah Johnson]

Never been out. Like, I'm good.

[Langston Kerman]

It's actually. You know what's funny? It doesn't feel that way when you're like. Like amongst them. They feel like a more liberal, frankly, more like, welcoming people than we are in America. But on the flip side, I just think when they do get racist, like, look how they reacted to Meghan Markle. That bitch is barely a color.

[David Borey]

And they were upset when I went over there. It felt like a boring New York.

[Josiah Johnson]

Really?

[David Borey]

Yeah, that's really how it felt. It felt like just like. Like kind of a. Like stuff shuts down earlier. But it is, like, ingrained in them to be.

[Langston Kerman]

I think it's at their root, it's at their core. And that's why their paparazzi is so mean and crazy and shit.

[David Borey]

I've always thought about this, about their media on some level, at least within their media, they are better about racial stuff than we are. Whereas, like, you'll watch a British movie, even from, like the 90s or something, they'll have a black guy and a white guy be a best friend. And that's not the point.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, no, that's what I mean is, like, they know how to present progressive, but when you get to some shit that they really don't want you to do, they Turn up.

[Josiah Johnson]

You don't fuck with the royal family, man.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, they don't want that bloodline looking like, what you offering? No, right, stop. Is their response.

[Josiah Johnson]

Shout out to Megan and Harry went to, I think, Lakers playoff game a couple years ago.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's why I had a little bread at that time. So I was sitting in like B level suites or might have got an A level. I think it was Lakers grizzly. But they were at the game one sweet over. We look over like, oh, shit. They just low key, holding it down. Got their own little security. But with the Lakers. So I had to roll with them. Like, all right, you know, whatever going on, y' all still pulling up the Lakers game. So I'm rolling with you.

[David Borey]

Come on.

[Langston Kerman]

That's so funny. You're willing to forgive the. The roots of racism because.

[Josiah Johnson]

Come on, Harry didn't do it.

[David Borey]

Harry didn't do it.

[Langston Kerman]

Harry's cool.

[Josiah Johnson]

Harry wants a chance.

[David Borey]

Come on, man.

[Langston Kerman]

He liked it. Harry liked it for a while. Then he stopped liking it.

[Josiah Johnson]

Harry said the family. I see y' all, Larry moving out here in Santa Barbara. We're gonna pull up the Lakers games. Hold it.

[Langston Kerman]

We move different. Y' all. Y' all go ahead. Y' all enjoy.

[David Borey]

Okay, I'm sorry.

[Langston Kerman]

Not me.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

Like say hates the royal family.

[Langston Kerman]

I hate the royal family.

[David Borey]

I don't like it. I'm saying I like Harry.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm teasing. I'm teasing. Okay, My. My next question for you as it relates to this.

[Josiah Johnson]

Are we going back to that? I thought we were.

[David Borey]

Let's do it. No. Yeah, we can go wherever.

[Langston Kerman]

We can go wherever.

[Josiah Johnson]

No, let's do it. I like it.

[David Borey]

I do want to ask. Yeah, I did. I had a question about it, too.

[Langston Kerman]

My next question for you is. Do you feel like you've been cheated out of any of the quote unquote rigging? As a Lakers fan, no Lakers, we.

[Josiah Johnson]

Haven'T had like a fuck you trade in a while, actually, I said that. And Luka trade was in February, so you forgot. But CP3, I think was the one of the few times when the Lakers actually got got. But. But by and large, for the most.

[Langston Kerman]

Part, you guys are the favorites.

[Josiah Johnson]

You look at the Gasol trade back in the day, trade him for his brother. And Marc Gasol ended up being a great player, but he wasn't shit at that point. He wasn't. It wasn't.

[Langston Kerman]

And he never became pal. He just was. He was his own guy.

[Josiah Johnson]

So as much as the league talks about parody and being competitive, at the end of the day. No disrespect to the Nuggets, but even looking at the playoffs right now, the ideal matchup as it stands right now, you want Timberwolves, Knicks, right? You got the Julius Randle cat. Like, yeah, Jokic is a fucking great story, and God bless you, but that and fans got mad at me when it was at Nuggets. He serious? I'm like, the fucking league don't want this shit, brother.

[David Borey]

I don't want this shit.

[Josiah Johnson]

People ain't watching it.

[David Borey]

I was watching the game with Langston last night, and I was like, you know how. How hard it is to have your team be the least cool.

[Josiah Johnson]

Good team, but a great team nonetheless, though, right? I'm a Westbrook guy. I love Joker. I love that squad.

[David Borey]

But as far as cool guys on.

[Langston Kerman]

A basketball team, nah, it's tough pickings over there.

[Josiah Johnson]

All basic humans. Joker literally tell you to your face, this shit is just a job for me. I'll see y' all when I see y' all when it's done. I don't even like doing this shit or being around y' all.

[David Borey]

He wants to raise horses on that little card he's got.

[Langston Kerman]

I watched the post game interview yesterday with the one where they catch him right at the end, and they were like, asking him, like, yo, you know, how'd you do? What is this? And the whole time, he's just looking like this past the lady as he's talking to her. He don't give a. He's like, I am. I am checked out of here.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm dropping a triple double. I'll see y' all later. I'm going right back to the crib.

[David Borey]

And when we. And when we do have cool guys, they don't want to be there.

[Langston Kerman]

No.

[David Borey]

Even for football, it's the same thing. They don't want to be mellow. Wasn't having a great time living in Denver.

[Josiah Johnson]

No, you had a. I like that. I like those. Mellow cruise. Okmar. J.R. smith. I mean, it was another.

[David Borey]

What a great time. What was it, the 2009 Western Conference finals with you guys? That was like, before I started comedy. And then maybe if I have a child or get married or whatever, that'll also be great. But that was the greatest time of my life. Like, the bench was deep, man. It just felt so good.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, you guys were fun to watch.

[David Borey]

We were fun. We were exciting guys.

[Langston Kerman]

And it was like a bunch of dudes who, like. Like the year before were being labeled, like, knuckleheads and misfits. The Nuggets.

[David Borey]

The Nuggets, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

It was like, oh, we. We've given up on these. These terrible youth. And then suddenly it became Barack Obama was president.

[David Borey]

I swear. Like, that Nuggets, Team Barack Obama. And the death of Michael Jackson pushed me to follow my dreams and move to California and start doing comedy. Like, that's how much. Like, if that doesn't happen, if that doesn't happen, I am a manager of a call center in Inglewood, Colorado, right now.

[Langston Kerman]

That's a nasty little crossover of, like.

[Josiah Johnson]

Perfect motivation that happened all in a reasonable time frame to each other. Yeah, I forgot about that.

[David Borey]

Also a dui. But that doesn't matter, bro. It's like all that stuff. All that stuff came together.

[Langston Kerman]

No, because it's beautiful. Because. Because you. You had all the motivation for yourself a la Barack Obama. You had all the personal joy. Joy in your life. A lot of the Nuggets. And then on top of that, you have all the motivation from fear.

[David Borey]

A lot.

[Langston Kerman]

Michael Jackson's life being cut short. You can find that profofall. Shout out to profofall. We want some of you.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's what y' all need.

[Langston Kerman]

I want that. Purple falls.

[David Borey]

I need my milk.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm like, damn, that milk sound kind of good. But I'm with her, but damn, you.

[Langston Kerman]

Know how bad I'm trying to go to bed right now.

[Josiah Johnson]

That was sleeping good, though.

[Langston Kerman]

I got two kids. I can use some rest. Purple Fall, please hook me up.

[Josiah Johnson]

I never heard of this before that.

[David Borey]

And I'm like, it never came up.

[Josiah Johnson]

If the King of Pop is calling that his milk.

[Langston Kerman]

His milk.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm sure he was sleeping good as that boy.

[Langston Kerman]

Couldn't go to bed. They said he died multiple times before he actually died. This is the theory is that literally he had died and they resuscitated him on different days, and he was still like, give me.

[Josiah Johnson]

Give me my milk. Shit, I need my milk.

[Langston Kerman]

That's. Michael was already up out of here.

[Josiah Johnson]

He did enough. He accomplished everything he did. He really went, y' all ain't got nothing for me. I can't.

[David Borey]

Yeah, what else is.

[Josiah Johnson]

You new niggas ain't fucking getting on my level.

[David Borey]

So how much better was it gonna get for him?

[Langston Kerman]

Not. It wasn't gonna get better.

[David Borey]

That's what I think. That's probably the hard part about being truly great. Yeah, it's something. Being truly, truly great. Is that the back end? It feels like. I mean, yeah. Even if you have a family or whatever, you're like, I was.

[Langston Kerman]

I was number one and we already had done.

[David Borey]

Look at my man crying right there.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, no crying about it. He having a hard time.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's liquor porn.

[Langston Kerman]

That's some of the finest tequila made by a man who was drunk.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm not smoking cigars, getting drunk all night. You still. Let me give you 50. What the. I done left, came back left, came back, made a move movie. You still ain't doing, bro. Y' all still suck.

[Langston Kerman]

He really.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm a LeBron guy, but when I look at it from that lens.

[Langston Kerman]

But he really lives so high on a level above everyone, that there wasn't even. We didn't even debate if there was a better person.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, for sure.

[Langston Kerman]

Now every. Every fucking week, somebody's claiming LeBron ain't the greatest. You know what I mean? Like, he'll spend his life with that. Even, like, as more players, they're going to give it to Wimby so fast.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, but do you know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

Like, there. That's.

[Josiah Johnson]

But we've seen it with Wemby, and that's the whole thing. And this is the point, because somebody asked me early on, would I rather go Chet or Wimby? And I said, chet, but they're two big tall dudes. But what we've seen, like, the Yao Ming. And just when a dude's that tall. And you hope that Wemby. Because Wemby does everything to take care of his body. I think this blood clot was just some unfortunate shit. But he's gotta be able to sustain. Cause we've seen him when he plays. He's the fucking highest level of hoop that we've ever seen in our life. This is a fucking cheat code. Yeah, but you a big ass motherfucker. So Yao Ming shit ended because of a toe, Shaq. Fucking toe. You know, you just think about that. My damn toe hurt. I can't fucking. I gotta retire.

[David Borey]

Like, there's a lot of toe.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, that's a big toe.

[David Borey]

Big ass toe.

[Josiah Johnson]

And that is the base of everything you got cracking. But as shorter Hoopers, like, oh, toe. I'll be good in a couple weeks. Like, these niggas like, I got. I'll check out.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, Mugsy bounce back, baby.

[David Borey]

Hey, come on.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, my shit little.

[David Borey]

That's a toe.

[Langston Kerman]

That's a Mugsy toe. You could take it up.

[Josiah Johnson]

I don't know. Yeah, but you hope. Like, you want. I mean, you see the dude when he plays and just how phenomenal. Shooting threes, doing everything he's doing. But then it's like, all right, had to miss this season. Hopefully they bounce back. You know, Pop getting old, having a stroke. His old ass was trying to stick around too long. Just as like, you know, my last kind of thing, I'm gonna give back to the league and get Wimby ready to go so I can go on and do what I'm doing. But saw Pop at his retirement shit, it was like, Damn, dog. Like 76, nigga. You can't keep up with these young. These niggas are 20.

[Langston Kerman]

And you're just standing there. It's not like you're, like, running up and down the court, but there is a level of, like, just keeping logically, keeping up energy, keeping up that you gotta match.

[Josiah Johnson]

I would tell everybody, encourage all you guys out there. Like, I do a show with Gil. We go like two and a half hours live and, like, just sit on the couch, go sit in the gym, just stand up for two and a half hours walking around and not do that shit every single day and see how much your back hurts, your leg. I coach high school. My shit, my knees and back be hurting. I gotta go take a seat in the big chair for a little bit to, like, juvenile. But he's 76. Having to do that, it's like, come on, man, set it down.

[David Borey]

Nah, get it. Get it out.

[Langston Kerman]

You gotta scowl when he doing it. He'd be mad. That wears on your body.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, for sure.

[Langston Kerman]

All that matter.

[David Borey]

Yeah, it takes less. Nope, I ain't have it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yep. All right, well, now we both let each other down.

[David Borey]

Yeah, man, I'm sorry. You know, it's a give and take relationship. You know.

[Langston Kerman]

You had the question that you said you wanted to ask.

[David Borey]

Oh, I just wanted to ask about the 1985 draft. How ballot manipulation, like, the idea of it was frozen or it was bent or it was like.

[Josiah Johnson]

You hear the different theories.

[David Borey]

Do you feel like that's a real possibility? I also wanted to ask. Cause you said your dad was in the league. Does he have feelings on it as well?

[Josiah Johnson]

Well, he's still employed by the league, so he has no feelings on it. He's just very working with the Milwaukee Bucks. Shout out to Giannis. Hopefully he stays out there. But I'm just like, you can do shit in plain sight, right? Like, you know, I'm a big fan of magic. You see all these magic tricks. Like, it's very easy to do shit and manipul, like, the eye and do all those type of things. So we're giving you. It's like, why do all that? Why not just worst team in the league. It's the number one pick. Why do we go through all this shit, King Kong balls, all these different things when we want competitive balance where you had three teams who were literally the fucking worst teams in the league and neither. None of those three teams got the top three picks in this draft.

[David Borey]

Right.

[Langston Kerman]

Well, what's funny is before 1985, which was sort of the source of us starting this conversation, that. So 1985 is the first official draft lottery. Lottery, which is why it was a big deal that Patrick Ewing got that before. It was a coin flip between the first and second worst team in the.

[Josiah Johnson]

League, which is how the Lakers get magic. I mean, that's. But that's even silly in itself. It's like football has it, right. You are the fucking worst team in the NFL. You get the first pick.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, yeah.

[David Borey]

And let's keep it recycled.

[Josiah Johnson]

I don't care if you tanked or did whatever the fuck you did. And now it's like the league's trying to punish tankers. So we're trying to punish you losers for losing by making you lose more.

[Langston Kerman]

Right.

[David Borey]

And that's how you get. You don't get people to come up on top. Right. Like it doesn't. You don't. You can't get new blood that way.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

Unless you got dough. I guess. Well.

[Langston Kerman]

And that's the argument is that. And. Well, I guess what makes it more complicated is that if this were rigging just for the sake of narrative. Right. At the end of the day, what. What makes wrestling. Enjoying. Enjoy. Enjoy.

[Josiah Johnson]

You got it. We know what you were saying.

[Langston Kerman]

The reason niggas like wrestling is because racial tension is because they ultimately are weaving the story with the intention of just selling you the best story.

[David Borey]

Right.

[Langston Kerman]

Right. But the NBA is going. Well, I'll sell you the best story that serves financial fucking back end so large that they're almost hard to keep track of.

[David Borey]

But it's also.

[Langston Kerman]

And that makes it kind of whack.

[David Borey]

But it's also ultimately because they're serving the best story for the biggest crowd. They're crowdsourcing it still. And I would argue that is the same thing the WWE is. They're just letting the. They're. They don't have to worry about a market. They have to worry about we bring this wrestler out, what do they think of him? But they're still servicing.

[Josiah Johnson]

So the NBA has to dangle that carrot of small market teams being able to get to the highest level and win championships. But when you talk about a league that's bitching about viewership and whatever. Like, the Lakers are going to have the worst team in the league. People are going to watch those games. Right? Like the Knicks. Right now you're seeing Knicks, Celtics, that series. And I see it when we do the show every day. And people kind of bitch at us like, man, you don't talk about Cavs, you don't talk about Pacers. And it's like, when we do talk about it, you motherfuckers don't watch.

[David Borey]

Right, Right.

[Josiah Johnson]

So do you want a show? Everybody has opinions on how we should do the show, whatever. But when y' all do it, like, y' all don't talk about these teams either. And it's like, oh, but the Cavs are doing so good. Yeah, but we know the Cavs are going to get packed up. Like, no disrespect to Cleveland. Love you guys. We knew the Cavs are going to get backed up. League's not allowing that. Like, what the fuck do you guys think is going on? Like, right, we got the Celtics and the Knicks both playing high level basketball. You think even the Pacers now they got to deal with that? And by the grace of God, a Pacers are able to get to the finals. More power to them. But you got the Knicks or Celtics coming to town. Like, who do you think we want to get to these finals?

[Langston Kerman]

So here's. Here's my question to that. How. How day to day do you think they're actually able to. To present these stories? I guess. You know what I mean?

[David Borey]

Because, like, how much control do they have over the narrative?

[Langston Kerman]

I always took it to be like, they're just setting it up so that this team is good this year. I didn't think they were setting it up in a way where they're like, I. All right, Cavs are cooking, but we're going to make sure that they don't get.

[Josiah Johnson]

Well, some. I mean, sometimes the teams will do that to themselves, but, like, you look at that Knicks Celtics game. Believe what game five, whatever it was. Jalen Brunson gets five fouls in the third quarter. This is the superstar of this team. But the series is 3:1, okay? Motherfucker got five fouls in a single quarter, right?

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's just not. That's not how it's going down. These refs know what's going on. You're trying to tell me the refs didn't know? Yeah, they're not tripping. Cause Tatum goes down like, shit. We gotta stretch this shit a little bit. A little bit.

[David Borey]

Like, step out. They can't go home.

[Josiah Johnson]

The worry they gonna win a game, like, shit, we gotta stretch it a little bit.

[Langston Kerman]

It's not total manipulation. They're not figuring out the box score. They're saying, like, hey, do what you can.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, exactly.

[Langston Kerman]

Are you out there and you still.

[Josiah Johnson]

Might be able to win with these variables? We're gonna make it a little bit more difficult for you.

[David Borey]

Cause that's what they can do. They can adjust factors, right?

[Langston Kerman]

Yep.

[David Borey]

They can, like, adjust little things.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. Take somebody out.

[Josiah Johnson]

Like, Halliburton got two fouls in the first quarter. I think they still end up. Up winning that game. But it's like, okay, we know it's going down.

[Langston Kerman]

That's the argument you always see with, like, the. The. They. They made it a bunch with Draymond in the. In the playoffs this year of him just tackling and falling and kicking.

[Josiah Johnson]

Like, Draymond found loopholes, though, because, like, they weren't foul, so they had to be tech. So he had, like, all together, I want to say, like, nine or 10 of them. He can get combined before he ends up get suspended. So I can get, like, three fragrance and fucking five techs, and I still got my eight. They were literally all flavor fouls. That's just me. I bing him in the head. It's not a foul on me because the foul's already been called. So I just give him a tech instead. All right, we good. He can stay in the game.

[David Borey]

That's some. That's. That's some five game suspension for bringing a gun, thinking, yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

Mastermind.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

And you talk to Gil. And Gil, literally a genie. Because he'll literally explain. He'll tell you guys, like, yo. And I saw, like. I think Telfair had had a situation. He got, like, two games. And I saw Stephen Jackson, like, shot a gun in front of a strip club, and he might have got three or four. So I'm like, I ain't getting no more than five. This is precedent. But now he comes thinking he's a genius to David Stern. David Stern's like, fuck you, nigga. You gonna take these 50 games? I'll let you keep your bread, but you're gonna take this 50.

[Langston Kerman]

Man. I see why ESPN was scared.

[David Borey]

Yes.

[Josiah Johnson]

You know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

It took them a minute, and then they were like, I don't know. Because if he think like that, he might say something on camera that we don't. We can't sponsor anymore.

[Josiah Johnson]

He's fucking. What was it? I think he was. Jokic is like, the worst three time MVP ever or some shit. Yeah, but when you look at the numbers, it's like, well, who's he better than on this list? It's like Larry Bird, LeBron, whatever. It wasn't like a sleight of yogic, but he knows how to stir the pot and fuck with people because they'll be like, fuck you, idiot. You don't know what you're talking about. Then they go look like, here's the list. Well, man, you know, like, all right, fine, like, whatever. You know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

There's nobody. You would actually put him.

[Josiah Johnson]

You can't put him, you know, you can't put. And that's no disrespect to Joker, but he literally like thinks about this shit. And I'll hear him say shit. He words it very specifically just to fuck with people, just to see prove me wrong. But when he's on espn, he's in the suit, he's doing what he gotta do so he can bounce. And when he gets to Gills arena, it's straight, you know, he's killing it.

[Langston Kerman]

But I know, I never scared of him.

[David Borey]

Yeah, I get it.

[Josiah Johnson]

But yeah, he tells the story like he did the jump or whatever it was back in the day, and he's like, all right, what words can I say on tv? So they give him the list. Here's the words you can't say. He's like, oh shit, douchebag's not on here. So I'm used that. And then it's like, yeah, yeah, like, come on, dog. Like, man, but I respect that level of petty and diligence to loopholing.

[Langston Kerman]

Do you when, when this loophole and when all the different sort of like strategies are in play, do you feel like there's something dangerous in the way that like we are now always aware of it before it actually even plays itself out for sure.

[Josiah Johnson]

Well, I think going into this shit, you can make the jokes about Mavs getting the number one pick or whatever, but that shit is so far fetched, you don't think it's going to happen. And then you sit there, watch it happen in real time. You watch the Sixers get the third pick. You talking about a Mavs team that was in the NBA finals last season, right? Talking about a Mavs team that without injuries to Kyrie and AD would be a top five, top six team in the west this season. So now you're literally telling me a team that has championship level aspirations, trades away their franchise guy gets AD in that crew, which is still a Very formidable team if they're having. And now we're going to add Cooper Flag to it because Kyrie's down for, you know, most of next season and we still need you guys to be competitive. So here, take the number one overall pick.

[David Borey]

Yeah, man, it doesn't add up.

[Josiah Johnson]

One of the biggest names. Buzzing. One of the strongest.

[Langston Kerman]

But then, but then I go. But as a fan, right? If I'm thinking about it more as like a fan of this whole thing. When I really loved wrestling was when I believed in wrestling.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

And now it's this era of wrestling where nobody believes in it. Even kids don't believe in wrestling.

[Josiah Johnson]

Well, kids are assholes now. And they're intelligent.

[Langston Kerman]

They.

[Josiah Johnson]

My kids know more than me. Like they can operate an iPad better than me. Like, no, you got to do this like you 8 years old.

[Langston Kerman]

I guess I worry that that then takes the enjoyment out of it if I become too self aware inside of the.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Inside of the beast. You know what I mean? Gil scares me, I guess is what.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm saying, is that he's just gonna.

[Langston Kerman]

Expose the whole thing and then I'm gonna be a dumb who thought magic was real.

[Josiah Johnson]

But I think we all gotta just watch Woodlands. We grew up watching wrestling. We grew up watching all these sports. I grew up watching the NBA. I'd read an article and just take that shit at face value. Now it's like I saw something the other day about Russ came out in the ESPN article. It's anonymous players. And I was asking the guys on the couch, I'm like, can you generally tell who the snitch in the locker room is? He's like, yeah, just go see the first person she comes up to when she pulls up or who's the nicest on the team when it happened. So imagine you gotta be in a locker room now. You know goddamn well it's one of you two niggas. Right here are the ones you who did.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

Who said all this anonymous player in my ass. Because I know he not talking to her. He don't with her like this dude don't mess with her. Like, but she walk in and who she dapping up? And I never thought about that. So we used to read these things and like you watch the last Dance and I think it was like Horace Grant, who was the one on that team that was kind of breaking all the information down or whatever.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

We would just take all that at face value. So I would say, oh, this guy's bad in the locker room. Like you've heard all this stuff about Russ his whole life. Like, Russell, UCLA guy. I've known Russia since he was a young pup. Like, has all this negativity surrounding him from a fan standpoint, and the media kind of feed into that. But everybody who's played with us, by and large available, fucking, you know, works his ass off fucking sets a good culture in the locker room. But you see a nigga miss a couple layups or shoot a couple shots off the backboard, and you put this narrative out there, he's just like the worst human being ever.

[David Borey]

And when he says you, he means me last night. Okay, but that's the Westbrook experience in Langston's living room. Like, that is the Westbrook experience.

[Josiah Johnson]

You'll be ready to choke his ass out there. He'll come through, get a big steal.

[David Borey]

Hit a three, do some crazy rushes. That's exactly what happens.

[Josiah Johnson]

But it doesn't stop. Every game is one way or the other. Sometimes you get both within the span of, like, two minutes.

[Langston Kerman]

But, yeah, he. He really sends you on a journey.

[David Borey]

That's true. That's true. And that is entertainment.

[Langston Kerman]

That's entertainment.

[David Borey]

And we got to take a break.

[Langston Kerman]

We need to take a break. We're going to take one more break, and then we're going to do some voicemails. We'll probably cover one voicemail. We'll be back with more Josiah Johnson on my mind. Mama told me.

[David Borey]

Hey.

[Gilbert Arenas]

We'Ve all heard the stories. Missing persons, double lives, suspicious basements. But here's one mystery you don't need in your life. Why can't my kid learn to ride a bike? For a lot of families, it turns into a saga. Meltdowns in the driveway, scraped knees and frustrated parents Googling how to teach a kid to ride a bike without losing your mind. That's where Guardian Bikes comes in. Their bikes are lightweight, low to the ground, and built to help kids find their balance fast. Most are riding confidently in just one day. No training wheels, no tears, just high fives and I did it moments. It's everything. Learning to ride should be simple, smooth, and actually fun. So skip the struggle and start with a bike that's made to make it easy. Guardian bikes. Go to guardianbikes.com you'll save hundreds when comparing Guardian to its competitors. Plus, get a free bike lock and pump a $50 value with your purchase when you join their newsletter. That's guardianbikes.com.

[Holly Frye]

Explore the winding halls of historical true crime with Holly Fry and Maria Tremarke, hosts of Criminalia, as they uncover Curious cases from the past. The legend of the highwayman suggests men dominated the field. But tell that to Lady Catherine Ferrars, known as the wicked lady who terrorized England in the mid-1600s. Her legend persists nearly 400 years after her death. Hear the story of the gentleman robber, the romantic darling of the ladies, and a tale about a wager over a sack of potatoes. But you'll have to tune in to learn who won that one. Some highwaymen were well mannered or faked it. People were concerned about the romanticism of Rob, but most were just thugs. Highwaymen are in the hot seat this season. Call them robbers or bandits. Some are legendary figures. Listen to stories about historical crimes on Criminalia now. Plus the cocktails and mocktails inspired by each. Listen to criminalia on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Jake Hanrahan]

I'm Jake Hanrahan, journalist and documentary filmmaker. Away Days is my new project, reporting on countercultures on the fringes of society all across the world. Live from the underground, you'll discover no rules fighting, Japanese street racing, Brazilian favela life, and much more. All real, completely uncensored. This is unique access with straightforward on the ground reporting. We're taking you deep into the dirt without the usual airs and graces of legacy media. A way that it showcases what the main stream cannot access. Real underground reporting with real people. No excuses. For the past decade, I've been going to places I shouldn't be, meeting people I shouldn't know. Now you can come along too. Listen to the Away Days podcast, reporting from the underbelly on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Langston Kerman]

Would you say that you're racist?

[Josiah Johnson]

Not at all, no.

[Langston Kerman]

Look at my dog.

[Josiah Johnson]

He's as black as can be.

[David Borey]

Come on, we're back. We're back. The blackest could be. Shout out to the dogs.

[Langston Kerman]

Shout out to them dogs.

[Josiah Johnson]

Colored dog. Real racist. Say nagra. They don't say the N word. Damn. Nagra.

[Langston Kerman]

They get so racist in Spanish.

[David Borey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

It's. Wow.

[Langston Kerman]

We want to do a voicemail with you. Listen to a voicemail from one of our little mamas at home and see what they talking about. Here we go.

[Caller]

Greetings, niggas, niggas, wiggas and wiggets.

[David Borey]

Whoa, Pause. Nope.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, I don't like that.

[Josiah Johnson]

Wiggers and wiggets.

[David Borey]

I don't like that he put that in there.

[Langston Kerman]

That feels odd that he put in.

[David Borey]

That because it makes me.

[Josiah Johnson]

I don't know which Side he's on Wiggers and wigette. He hates the all is. Anything that. That's a residual blackness.

[David Borey]

I've also never heard the term wig at till today.

[Langston Kerman]

Wigat.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, they are.

[David Borey]

I've seen it. I've seen it.

[Langston Kerman]

I've seen it for sure. I. Yeah. White people, I think, are trying to do a little magic trick with that word wigger.

[David Borey]

Oh, like it's not.

[Langston Kerman]

I think they're trying to make it a bad word.

[David Borey]

No. You think so?

[Langston Kerman]

I think white people are now trying to be like, I should shouldn't say that.

[David Borey]

They're the ones who say it, and that's. It's their shit.

[Langston Kerman]

And then I think it becomes this magic trick of it suddenly, like our responsibility to police some shit that we didn't even make up in the first place.

[Josiah Johnson]

It always goes, now. Now it's DEI is the safe word for nigga.

[David Borey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

It was like, damn, everybody that got hired. Just if they. Not a white man. Like, they just were unqualified and uncapable of doing anything.

[David Borey]

Like, everybody doesn't have jobs. Jobs.

[Langston Kerman]

No, it's. It's crazy who they'll call a DEI hire, where it's like, hey, man, I get it. I get it. You. Whoever's at your work might be upsetting you, but we gotta chill with how we're labeling.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah, yeah. I see it every day now. I'm just like, wow, man. They really just flipped the script. But woke, how that became.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, no, woke.

[David Borey]

They went crazy.

[Josiah Johnson]

Like, I don't want any woke here. What does that mean?

[David Borey]

They don't know. It means black.

[Josiah Johnson]

Black or not, their. It's too woke. Like. Huh? What does that mean?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, it's nasty.

[Josiah Johnson]

Define it. Oh, you can't.

[Langston Kerman]

No, you don't want to talk about that part. All right, fair enough.

[David Borey]

Cool.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'll just keep doing what I do anyways.

[David Borey]

Wiggettes.

[Langston Kerman]

Wiggettes. Let's find out what they talking about.

[Caller]

All right, so check this out, y' all. My mama told me white people love to see black people food. Now hear me out. Not just black people, but black boys specifically. All right, now think about this. Anytime you've gone to a basketball game, whether at a big arena where it's college or pro or whatever, they will always have. Mainly college. They will always have some underprivileged group come in and do flips in front of everybody. Half time, you got skinny doing somersaults, twists, and double axles and all kind of. And I grew up in Tennessee, you know, we had A whole group that did this thing. And the crazy thing about it, it was called Flippo. Bear with me. This gets dark. Word around a campfire was that Flippo was actually getting these boys booty. Flippo, I believe dude went to jail for it. Or at least he was charged with it. Know that. You know, you cannot have a legit dude trying to get young boys to turn flips for white folk. You can't have him doing that and being up. You know, he's trying to get those.

[David Borey]

Some of these guys are just gymnastics coach.

[Josiah Johnson]

You.

[David Borey]

You gotta relax.

[Josiah Johnson]

This thing went so many different places. I was rolling with the black man flipping part because I was like, damn, they do have be flipping, right?

[Langston Kerman]

100.

[Josiah Johnson]

But then Flippo.

[David Borey]

This feels like a personal thing against Flip.

[Langston Kerman]

Flippo got crazy.

[Josiah Johnson]

Flippo.

[Langston Kerman]

You feel like Flippo's worst enemy.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

I was like. And I heard the was them kids.

[David Borey]

Yeah. Yeah, bro. That's different than the conspiracy you brought.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. You bring in some. Some personal shit to flip o situation.

[Josiah Johnson]

They call a number and leave this voicemail.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

Sometimes they can just go as long as they want.

[Langston Kerman]

They can go like two and a half minutes.

[Josiah Johnson]

Cause that was fucking. He went. He's not on journey. Okay.

[Langston Kerman]

He's not done. I will say. I will say. On the subject of the little black boys flipping, my former stepfather. I famously have spoken about this. My former stepfather was. Was Benny the Bull at one point.

[Josiah Johnson]

Okay, wow.

[Langston Kerman]

Did not know that he was in fact the most infamous Benny the Bull of all time because he got fired for selling weed after a game to one of the players.

[David Borey]

Your hero's journey is so crazy, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

And just to top it all off, he didn't become my stepfather till after all of that.

[Josiah Johnson]

Oh, wow. Wow.

[Langston Kerman]

Just way, way after we could have benefited from any of his success.

[Josiah Johnson]

How did they find out he was in the.

[Langston Kerman]

Caught him.

[David Borey]

He was in. He was in the. He was in that helmet. He was weighing out 3.5 grams.

[Josiah Johnson]

Hump was 3.5. Need to take nothing off of me. I know how you dope dealers calling it haters and them sh Go.

[Langston Kerman]

He give him a hook up. He gonna take care of his man Tony.

[Josiah Johnson]

I wonder the players snitch or the team caught him on surveillance camera.

[Langston Kerman]

Like, I think it was caught on surveillance camera.

[Josiah Johnson]

These are haters, man. Wait, did you. Was that the Nuggets game or the Wolves game when it did yesterday to do. Do the. He did a.

[David Borey]

No, I haven't seen.

[Josiah Johnson]

It's on Twitter right now, but he's boop boop. Hit it up. I forget which which one of these NBA games it was at, but y know, I'll be on Twitter all day. I'm just like, damn, that motherfucker is bold. It's either Nuggets or. Or Timberwolves.

[David Borey]

That sounds like something my city would partake in.

[Langston Kerman]

I feel like it's one of them things where. Where especially as a white person, you go, like, I mean, what are they really gonna do about it?

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

You know what I mean, what are they gonna.

[David Borey]

I mean. Yeah, what are they gonna do?

[Josiah Johnson]

And you can't sell weed to the players. Like, I'm helping you.

[Langston Kerman]

No, it's crazy. I genuinely. It's crazy. But also, it's like, well, you knew what they would do about it. But I bring all that up to say that he was a part of a group called the Jesse White Tumblers, which was the sort of like. Like, famous group of little black boys that do flips across the city of Chicago.

[David Borey]

Okay. It was Flippos. Flippo Chi Town.

[Langston Kerman]

If niggas are flipping, they are Jesse White Tumblers, and they are.

[Josiah Johnson]

No flipping goes on without Jesse White involved.

[Langston Kerman]

Exactly.

[David Borey]

In this city, you flip in this town.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

You give me my kickback. You let me get my beak wet.

[Langston Kerman]

I heard there's a boy over here who like to flip.

[Josiah Johnson]

Fucking Flippo.

[Langston Kerman]

Hate for that mattress to get moved.

[Josiah Johnson]

Flippo holding down Tennessee. Damn, man.

[David Borey]

I mean, that's a different thing than what we need to be. That's personal.

[Langston Kerman]

I do believe him about Flippo.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

I don't doubt that.

[David Borey]

He wouldn't have done that.

[Josiah Johnson]

He felt inclined and inspired to leave a voicemail.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

To give you a whole conspiracy about flipping at games and looking at little black boy's flip to let you know that Flippo was out there grabbing.

[Langston Kerman]

And I think that maybe that's why that conspiracy was triggering for him.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Where he's like, no, I've seen the. I've seen the history.

[David Borey]

I know how this could go.

[Langston Kerman]

I know how they're. I know what they have to go through to get here. And if it's just for white entertainment, then that is. There's something malicious happening here.

[Josiah Johnson]

Damn.

[Caller]

I mean, think about this. Jordan Childs. She grew up in the hood. She's from country something, but she's a small lady. She's a gymnast. I know dudes that turn flips that grew up in the hood. They weren't gymnasts. They were victims. So what y' all think about that? Every time you see a group of black Boys flipping. Turning flips for exhibition. It's for white people. They love to see us flip. I hope y' all see today.

[Josiah Johnson]

Hope you see titties.

[Langston Kerman]

That was really nice, man.

[David Borey]

My man's. There's a lot going on with him.

[Josiah Johnson]

I hope that you, myself, include. Cause I'm a guest on the show. Sees titties today.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

Thank you.

[David Borey]

No, I do like that. I do like that.

[Langston Kerman]

That's really nice.

[David Borey]

I will say, now that I'm thinking about it, I think that black people flip at a higher percentage than other. Any other rate.

[Josiah Johnson]

Are we more acrobatic?

[David Borey]

I don't know. I just feel like I've seen more black men flip than any other race of men.

[Langston Kerman]

I. I agree with that.

[David Borey]

I seen. I never. I. Black men are the only ones that I've seen fat guys flip.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

I never seen a fat white guy do a flip.

[Josiah Johnson]

Wow.

[Langston Kerman]

There's those two Spanish dudes that do that. The two fat that do, like, flips.

[Josiah Johnson]

His legs.

[David Borey]

Oh, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

But I'm saying that's as close as I.

[Josiah Johnson]

The rocking jersey. I wear a rocking shirt. You talking about the.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. When they're, like, popping and then trade spaces.

[Josiah Johnson]

Honestly, one of my favorite clips on.

[Langston Kerman]

The Internet, I still don't even know how it works. I just know that one flipped over the other.

[Josiah Johnson]

And then they had to practice that. I don't think that was their first time ever doing it.

[David Borey]

You can't walk.

[Josiah Johnson]

They're, like, experts at doing that. And they saved that for those moments how I envisioned it.

[Langston Kerman]

They do that every day.

[David Borey]

You learn to do that in a basement.

[Langston Kerman]

They wake up, they brush their teeth, they practice a flip, then they have breakfast.

[Josiah Johnson]

That was their moment. That was their moment.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I do like what he's saying, though, about sort of this being a grander black. The fact that black kids, black men specifically, are not being, like, fed into a gymnastics community does feel sinister in some kind of.

[David Borey]

My little brother's in gymnastics, but he got that in Europe. Right? My little brother's like, a world. He's pretty good.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

He was like.

[Josiah Johnson]

He went for world class.

[David Borey]

Well, no, he did international competition. He did one international or one or two international clubs where it's like seven or eight.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's real good.

[Langston Kerman]

So he is world class.

[David Borey]

Yeah, he's world class.

[Langston Kerman]

You were trying to be protective to not, like, make him suddenly an Olympian.

[David Borey]

Yeah, I didn't want it to seem like that.

[Josiah Johnson]

Okay.

[David Borey]

But he is, like, top. Top tier.

[Langston Kerman]

Hell, yeah.

[David Borey]

But they didn't do that for him in America. He had to move to Europe before that.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[David Borey]

In America. My man was just trying to play soccer and shit.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, yeah. No, I. I think California. I think it's exactly that. I think it is this strange lack of instinct for putting black boys into gymnastic spaces, which is why when there's, like, a black dude on the team, it's like, oh, oh, where'd that come from? But the whole time they've been telling us we're the most athletic people and we're equipped to win every sport, then why not gymnastics, Right?

[Josiah Johnson]

That's fair.

[David Borey]

That is fair.

[Josiah Johnson]

They said now you just gotta flip a basketball game for the halftime show.

[David Borey]

Or in a parking lot.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

That's all you can inspire.

[David Borey]

That's where I be seeing that shit happen, dog.

[Langston Kerman]

The Jesse White Tumblers came out for us. Three on three tournament. I did when I was in sixth grade. Man, that shit's low. You know what I mean? Like, that wasn't.

[Josiah Johnson]

It wasn't for the people.

[David Borey]

They were just flipping.

[Langston Kerman]

I think we were going to split, like, $150 check.

[Josiah Johnson]

Flipping for the love.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

They flew. They drove them from the south side to get to us. That's crazy.

[David Borey]

Amount of black men I've seen flip with no formal coaching, they just figured that out.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David Borey]

Which is brave. Which is brave. You ever just joked around trying to do a foot to figure out you could do that? There's, like, a level of bravery you have to have.

[Langston Kerman]

It's extremely brave. They don't even have, or they didn't have YouTube to, like, teach them the beginning steps.

[David Borey]

They just figured out they could do it.

[Langston Kerman]

They just jumped off a thing and they were like, I didn't. I didn't die. So, yeah, I think I can do that now.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

That's crazy.

[David Borey]

So I'm. I'm with you. Flippo is maybe your own thing, but I am. I'm against Flippo as well, but I'm with your conspiracy theory.

[Josiah Johnson]

I rock with it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I rock with it.

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm not.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm not gonna write any letters on behalf or against Flippo. I. I'm staying out of it. But I do believe Flippo is a criminal, and I hope that he's. He's met accountability. All right.

[David Borey]

Yeah, I think we did it.

[Josiah Johnson]

Thank y' all so much, man.

[Langston Kerman]

This was great. Could you tell the people where they can find you what cool stuff?

[Josiah Johnson]

I'm at that stage in my life, I don't want anybody to find me anymore. So I just appreciate y' all letting me pull up.

[David Borey]

I get it.

[Josiah Johnson]

Started finding you and start asking for jobs and shit. And I don't have jobs. I'm barely trying to keep my job. But now you on what is it? X now. King Josiah 54. I'm on threads now too. I'm really trying to do some things over at Threads. A little bit more peaceful, less cancer wishes, death threats, kind of a little bit more. More night. But I also miss.

[David Borey]

Feel like it's a lot of robots over there though.

[Josiah Johnson]

My thing with Threads is like I miss that shit too. I need one or two just to keep me on my toes every once in a while. Cause if it ain't my best shit, like please pack me up.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, you really gotta search through the crates on Threads to get the nasty sort of like gutter stuff. And I do. I feel the same way.

[Josiah Johnson]

I miss it a little bit. Like one or two is fine, but just not the plethora of it. But yeah. King Josiah on all social media. King Josiah 54. Excuse me, let me remember. Cause I went to King Josiah to get all the love.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josiah Johnson]

Stealing my shit. The 54th in line.

[Langston Kerman]

54Th in line. But number one here today.

[Josiah Johnson]

I appreciate it. There we go.

[Langston Kerman]

And boy, what you got?

[David Borey]

Cool guy jokes87 on Instagram. Littlefield, Brooklyn, New York, June 15. That's the one I'm gonna be. I got some Bay Area dates a week before that. I don't have them in front of me. Littlefield, Brooklyn, New York, June 15th.

[Langston Kerman]

Hell yeah.

[David Borey]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Follow me at Langston Kerman on all social media platforms. Watch my special. It's called Bad Poetry. It's on Netflix. And most importantly, like subscribe rate review. Send us your own thoughts, conspiracies. If you have a team that you think got rigged out of the opportunity, send it all to mymamapodmail.com we would love to hear from you. And call us at 844-LIL-MOMS. We love hearing your sweet voices and your nasty conspiracies. And most importantly, call your mama. Bye. Bit My Mama Told Me is a production of Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network and I Heart Podcast, created and.

[David Borey]

Hosted by Langston Kerman.

[Langston Kerman]

Co hosted by David Bore, executive produced.

[David Borey]

By Will Ferrell Hansani and Olivia Aguilar.

[Langston Kerman]

Co produced by Bay Wayne edited and.

[David Borey]

Engineered by Justin Kahne Music by Nick Chenko artwork by Dogon Krieger.

[Langston Kerman]

You can now watch episodes of My Mama told me on YouTube. Follow at my Mama Told Me and subscribe to our channel.

[Holly Frye]

Explore the winding halls of historical true crime with Holly Fry and Maria Tremarki, hosts of Criminalia, as they uncover kids curious cases from the past. The legend of the Highwayman suggests men dominated the field, but tell that to Lady Catherine Ferrers, known as the Wicked lady who terrorized England in the mid-1600s. Her legend persists nearly 400 years after her death. Highwaymen are in the hot seat this season. Find more crime and cocktails on Criminalia. Listen to criminalia on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcast.

[Jake Hanrahan]

Podcasts I'm Jake Hanrahan, journalist and documentary filmmaker. Away Days is my new project reporting on countercultures on the fringes of society all across the world. Live from the underground, you'll discover no rules fighting, Japanese street racing, Brazilian favela life, and much more. All real, completely uncensored. Listen to the Away Days podcast reporting from the underbelly on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Langston Kerman]

This is an iHeart podcast.