(with Clark Jones)

Summary

Podcast Summary: My Momma Told Me (with Clark Jones)

Podcast: My Momma Told Me
Hosts: Langston Kerman & David Gborie
Guest: Clark Jones
Date: January 27, 2026

Episode Overview

In this engaging and hilarious episode, comedians Langston Kerman and David Gborie are joined by fellow comedian Clark Jones for a wide-ranging discussion centered on one of the most entertainingly paranoid Black conspiracy theories: “Porn sites secretly take photos of users to blackmail you later.” Through their trademark blend of wit, honesty, and tangents, the trio unpacks everything from digital surveillance anxieties, AI mistrust, “gooning,” and childhood nostalgia, to the economics of plastic bag hoarding in Black households. The episode also features playful riffs on rap memory loss, cartoon theme songs, and the ever-present threat of smart technology.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

Announcements & Banter (02:05–05:50)

• Patreon Launch: The hosts excitedly reveal the My Momma Told Me Patreon, promising extra content, mailbags, livestreams, and more quirky perks.
• Playful Roasting: Early banter about photographing Cornel West in Costco, with Clark calling out the “Bigfoot-level” grainy photo David sent.

Aging, Rap, and "Plastic Bag Billionaires" (06:44–16:00)

• Rap Memory Loss:
  • Getting worse at rapping as you age:
    “Isn’t that embarrassing? Because I was never a rapper and I got worse at it.” – David (07:11)
  • Discussion on white girls nailing rap verses and nostalgia for youthful recall.
• Black Household Plastics Economy:
  • The number of plastic bags one should save (one good bag full of others).
  • “I throw away plastic bags.” – Langston (09:15)
  • The outer “Shell bag” must be the thickest, often from a clothing store, signaling status.
  • Plastic bag color codes “tell you your economic standing”—black for higher-end beauty supply stores, clear for lower.
  • Hoarding plastic bags and napkins is debated as a signifier of Black household authenticity and resourcefulness.
  • “We’re acting like plastic bag billionaires.” – David (16:29)

Cultural Status, Community, & Conspiratorial Tangents (16:34–20:40)

• The importance of “being seen” and names being misused in the comedy community.
• Willingness to rebrand the podcast for $10,000:
  “You can name the podcast.” – Langston (19:57)
• Offers and running jokes about podcast naming rights for money.

Main Conspiracy Theory: Porn Sites Secretly Take Your Photo (20:41–27:46)

• Clark Jones’s Theory: Porn sites are using your device’s camera to record incriminating footage for future blackmail.
  • “There is a database of O faces.” – Clark (21:08)
  • Discussion comparing it to how Twitter was archived by the Library of Congress.
• Shame and Vulnerability:
  • Worst part is not the “O face,” but the “looking for porn face” and “tissue walk.”
  • Universal agreement that the post-porn experience is full of “sad stumbles.”
  • “If they get the footage of you walking to get a tissue after… they just get that sad fucking stumble.” – Langston (22:54)
• Commenting on Porn:
  “What are you doing commenting?!” – Clark (32:26)
• The dangers of having search histories or comments online, especially for public figures.

Gooning and Post-Nut Clarity (27:47–32:30)

• Definition of “Gooning”: Deep-diving into “goon caves,” where people immerse themselves in porn via multiple screens or VR setups.
  • “Gooning is when … you are surrounding yourself with screens and like pictures and … pushing yourself to the maximum.” – Langston (28:33)
• The horror of not having “post-nut clarity” and the disturbing notion of sticking around on porn sites after climax.
• Clark and David joke about how gooners should have to wear masks or “scarlet letters.”
• Playful religious riff: “The only thing I goon is the Lord.” – Langston (31:44)

Technological Surveillance & Smart Devices (56:20–61:15)

• Malware That Snaps Webcam Photos: Langston cites an article about porn-related info-stealer malware.
  • “We do not do this without your consent … shut the fuck up.” – Langston (57:07)
• Government Surveillance:
  • Clark references former CIA operatives openly admitting to repurposing everyday tech for spying.
  • “Anything with smart in it, you’re being watched.” – Clark (58:21)
• Smart Fridges as a Threat:
  • Jokes about how fridges with cameras might become the real avenue for blackmail.
  • “I don’t want you to see how long those tenders from Costco lasted.” – David (58:30)
  • Fridge-watching could be more embarrassing than porn.
  • “I think the fridge is a real threat. And I think it has a better camera for capturing your whole embarrassing journey.” – Langston (59:27)

AI, Digital Identity, and the Coming Downfall (61:15–69:59)

• ID for Porn Access: States that require selfies or IDs to access adult sites, leading to more data collection.
  • “First thing the government does is get you used to having a photo submitted.” – Clark (61:57)
• AI’s Dangers:
  • Are flawed AI images/"bad fingers" a deliberate disinformation tactic? Yes, Clark says.
    • “The theory is that they’re intentionally fucking up the fingers so people aren’t alarmed.” – Clark (64:12)
  • AI’s insidious spread tricking even careful users, sometimes using trusted memes.
  • The risk of deep-fakes: “Meanwhile, you’re about to get deep faked into a crime here, bro.” – David (65:57)
  • AI as both potentially useful and ultimately threatening—possibly leading to widespread irrelevance or “digital slavery.”
    • “We are going to make ourselves slaves if we don’t at least go chill.” – Langston (69:12)

Sociopolitical Commentary & Generational Accountability (69:20–74:27)

• Fears about future generations severely judging the present for letting AI and surveillance get out of hand.
  • “They’re gonna come down on us hard for the shit that we let slide.” – Clark (69:43)
• Joking about “frontline” resistance vs. just “laying down” in the face of technological overreach.
• “I’m just throwing these plastic bags away. That’s how I still have power.” – Clark (76:09)

Nostalgia & Black TV Cartoons Voicemail (79:07–86:31)

• Listener Devon from Brooklyn calls in about the hidden origins of Disney Afternoon cartoons.
  • “Darkwing Duck is Father Knows Best. Tailspin is Moonlighting. Goof Troop is just a Black single father trying to raise his child.” – Voicemail (79:07–81:39)
  • Hosts riff on the Blackness of cartoon theme songs and why some shows resonated so deeply.
  • “The theme song makes a big determinant in whether or not Black people consume more of it.” – Langston (83:41)
  • Influential theme songs, including Golden Girls, DuckTales, and Darkwing Duck.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Rap Memory Loss:
  “When I was like, 19, every word. Perfect placing timing. Like every song, I knew the words.” – Langston (07:16)
• On Black Household Habits:
  “You only need one plastic bag worth of plastic bags.” – David (10:38) “Throwing away plastic bags and not having napkins, all purpose. That coon card…you gonna throw it on, you’re done.” – Clark (15:13)
• On O-Face Database Conspiracy:
  “There is a database of O faces…the Library of Congress used to keep a record of all tweets…why not your O face?” – Clark (21:08) “If they get the footage of you walking to get a tissue after because you didn’t set up properly…they just get that sad fucking stumble.” – Langston (22:54)
• On “Post Nut Clarity”:
  “The real bummer is if they get the footage of you walking to get a tissue after because you didn’t set up properly.” – Langston (22:54)
• On Smart Tech Surveillance:
  “Anything with smart in it, you’re being watched.” – Clark (58:21)
• On Theme Songs & Black Cartoons:
  “The theme song makes a big determinant in whether or not Black people consume more of it.” – Langston (83:41)
• On Generational Judgment:
  “They’re gonna come down on us hard for the shit that we let slide, man.” – Clark (69:43)
• On AI as a Double-Edged Sword:
  “We are going to make ourselves slaves if we don’t at least go chill.” – Langston (69:12)

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Important Segment Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment/Topic | |-----------|--------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:05 | Patreon announcement & banter about Cornel West photo | | 06:44 | Aging & nostalgia: rap recall, white girls rapping | | 09:15 | Plastic bag hoarding in Black homes | | 20:41 | Main conspiracy: “Porn sites secretly snap photos…” | | 21:08 | Clark’s “O face” database theory | | 27:47 | Gooning, goon caves, post-nut clarity | | 56:20 | Techspot article: malware that snaps webcam during porn use | | 58:21 | “Anything with smart in it, you’re being watched.” | | 61:15 | ID/selfie requirements for porn sites, state-level laws | | 64:12 | Is “bad AI” a psy-op strategy? | | 68:07 | AI and media trust, accidental reposting of AI content | | 69:20 | Generational self-critique/"People will judge us for this…" | | 79:07 | Listener voicemail: Disney Afternoon, cartoons & Blackness | | 83:41 | Why Black audiences love certain theme songs |

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Episode Tone & Style

The episode remains casual, irreverent, and heartfelt, with the trio riffing freely, making each other laugh, and shifting seamlessly between sharp social commentary and outright silliness. The hosts’ camaraderie and Clark’s dry, observational humor create a welcoming feel even as they swing from jokes to Six O'Clock News-level paranoia.

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Key Takeaways

• Clark’s conspiracy theory—while mostly tongue-in-cheek—sparks genuine conversations about privacy, surveillance, and the creep of everyday technology.
• The hosts play with paranoia and skepticism, using comedy to process and question the increasing presence of AI and surveillance.
• Black household culture, nostalgia, and the importance of representation (even in cartoons and theme songs) are recurring motifs.
• The group recognizes both the power and limitations of social and technological change, urging a mix of vigilance and acceptance.

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Follow the hosts:

• Clark Jones: @ClarkLaRueJones & Husky Nigga Fits on Instagram
• David Gborie: @CoolGuyJokes87
• Langston Kerman: @LangstonKerman

Submit Your Theory:

• Email: [e-mail]
• Call: 844-LIL-MOMS

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Final Word:
“We just turn on each other in every comment.” – Clark (33:56)
“We are exchanging things that you like with things you might like in a different form.” – Langston (84:37)

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(End of summary)

Transcript

[Langston Kerman]

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[Langston Kerman]

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[David Bore]

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[Langston Kerman]

Lenovo.

[David]

Stop everything.

[Langston Kerman]

Put that shit down.

[David]

Stop making love to your significant others. We're talking.

[Langston Kerman]

Get your penis out of your wife.

[David]

And get that pussy out of your side piece.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, out of it.

[David]

Into your. I've never had sex before.

[Langston Kerman]

We have big news.

[David]

Big, huge news.

[Langston Kerman]

Unbelievable news.

[David]

For all of you who want to see us get filthy rich.

[Langston Kerman]

We are offering up a new opportunity. A bag of beans if you will, that we're hopeful you believe is gonna grow into a giant beanstalk. Yeah. Magical beans. And those magical beans are the My mama Told Me Patreon. I actually am 1.4% Nigerian. African. I'm a sister.

[Clark Jones]

Okay.

[Langston Kerman]

Why is that the button you pressed?

[David]

I shouldn't have smoked.

[Langston Kerman]

We're starting a Patreon.

[David]

We're starting a Patreon. It's gonna be so much fun. We're gonna have, what, four. Four extra episodes a month?

[Langston Kerman]

It's four extra episodes. It's all kinds of games. It's watch alongs, it's grab bags.

[David]

It's gonna be all mailbags, livestreams, all this stuff. Langston's nudes.

[Langston Kerman]

This is the first I'm hearing of it. But I'm not in a space to contradict. I'm desperate for you to join, so if that is what will entice you to come see us over at Patreon, please do that.

[David]

Yeah. So you can go ahead and go online to www.patreon. backslash. It's on the bottom.

[Langston Kerman]

Yep.

[David]

We'll have it flashing on the screen.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, we don't tell me likely, but yeah. But we'll figure it out. It's coming. Bye, bitch.

[David]

I seen Cornel west the other day, too.

[Langston Kerman]

You keep saying that. I don't think it was.

[Clark Jones]

It was. T looks worse. He looks worse off camera.

[David]

Felt like it, but it was. I. It was crazy circumstances for it to have been him.

[Langston Kerman]

Tell the circumstances.

[David]

Me and the lady were at Costco already.

[Clark Jones]

Sure it was him.

[Langston Kerman]

Here's what I'll also tell you about this. Supposedly Cornel west is that David sent me a picture of Cornel west in Costco in this Yale hoodie. And first of all, I know that first of all, the picture looked like fucking Bigfoot footage, yo.

[David]

Cause we were far away.

[Langston Kerman]

It's one of the worst photos I've ever seen a human being send to another human being in this.

[Clark Jones]

Like, what. What Apple, iPhone do you have?

[David]

I got the newest one.

[Langston Kerman]

He's got the newest one. He has the technology to have taken a better picture of Cornell West.

[Clark Jones]

Grainy.

[Langston Kerman]

He knows this is not Cornell West.

[Clark Jones]

He threw a grainy filter on there.

[Langston Kerman]

In his heart, he knew he could not show me this man and me believe that this is Cornell.

[Clark Jones]

I just couldn't. He thinks very little of your judgment. Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

He really was like, yo, who's the stupidest friend I have?

[Clark Jones]

He figured you're so high off the alcohol commercial. Yeah, he's been paying attention. That is in. No way. Crunch. That's what I'm saying.

[David]

All right, guys.

[Clark Jones]

That's all I'm trying to say.

[David]

My mama told me.

[Clark Jones]

Oh, he got the Princeton. He got the Princeton joint.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David]

That's crazy.

[Clark Jones]

That's got to go on already, man. Is this Cornell West?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, that's. That's.

[David]

I do realize it's so far. And that's a bad angle.

[Clark Jones]

He was like, that is Uncle Drew.

[Langston Kerman]

If he would have said, yo, I saw Uncle Drew at Costco.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

I'd be like, bro, that's crazy. That's definitely Uncle Kyrie back at it.

[David]

The government growing babies Microchips in your anus. All koala bears are racist. The ozone layer owes me money. Marshy to venom Turkey stuff. Y' all can't tell me nothing.

[Langston Kerman]

Slob on my knob like corn on the cob. Check in with me. Then you do your job.

[Clark Jones]

There it is.

[Langston Kerman]

There it is.

[Clark Jones]

It kind of was.

[Langston Kerman]

I it.

[David]

We can re.

[Clark Jones]

Record it. Oh, man.

[Langston Kerman]

Do your job.

[Clark Jones]

It's like, do your job. Yeah.

[David]

You had it. You had it. 98.

[Langston Kerman]

And I just really fumbled that then. And. And I'm not proud of that.

[David]

Have you. Well, let's finish this. And then I have a question to ask the podcast.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't know.

[Clark Jones]

Were you doing the odds?

[Langston Kerman]

Shut the up. Ladies and gentlemen, little mamas and gentiles alike, welcome to a phenomenal episode of My Mama Told Me the podcast, where.

[David]

We dive deep, deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theories.

[Langston Kerman]

And we don't want to prove for a God damn.

[David]

We don't want you to learn shit.

[Langston Kerman]

You motherfuckers learn something. I'm going to give you a knuckle sandwich.

[David]

Say learn again. Say it again.

[Langston Kerman]

Making me mad.

[David]

What I wanted to ask both of you, have you found that even in singing along to music, you've gotten worse at rapping as you've gotten older?

[Langston Kerman]

Absolutely.

[David]

Isn't that embarrassing? Because I was never a rapper and I got worse at it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yep.

[David]

When I was like, 19, every word. Perfect placing timing. Like every song, I knew the words.

[Langston Kerman]

You know why that. That video of that white girl rapping, the Lil baby went so nuts?

[David]

Because she nailed it.

[Clark Jones]

Swim in the ocean.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. Is because old niggas didn't know how to do it.

[David]

Yep.

[Langston Kerman]

So we went. We. Damn. I don't even know those words.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

That's crazy that she does the whole.

[David]

I got some juvenile like that.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David]

But like. Yeah, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

And there were white girls of our era that could just ride along to Nelly the Whole time.

[Clark Jones]

Do you know what I mean?

[David]

And they rolled blunts and it just.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, I had a lot of black girls in my inbox who at the time thought I was like more famous than I was. Like I knew people.

[David]

Well, that sounds like a plan executed.

[Clark Jones]

No, no, I was very thank. They thought I knew everybody. That went viral. They were like, why did this? Like they knew. They thought I knew the. The. The shit behind every conspiracy. You know, like, you're in the industry. Why did she go? I'm like, okay, well, you wrapped the verse. And she was like, well, I can't. Well, like that's why she's famous and you're not. You can't even do famous.

[David]

Is.

[Clark Jones]

She didn't like that.

[Langston Kerman]

This person.

[David]

She did have a moment.

[Clark Jones]

Famous.

[David]

Talking about the one at the wedding, right?

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shock of the woman. You swim with the like. Yeah, I still. I spend a lot of time in the car, so I can still. I can still rap pretty good.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[David]

Really?

[Clark Jones]

You were a cunning linguist in. That's what you majored in, right?

[Langston Kerman]

Watch him out. What we not gonna do is speak to each other that way. You got some nerve.

[Clark Jones]

You told me to shut the fuck up. So now it's on site on 4 them graves. As a Chicagoan, I gotta come in and say that at least five times.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, no, it's gonna come up for sure.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, man. When I'm really passionate about a point. So I'm all in.

[Langston Kerman]

I have something that I wanna say that I think is necessary. I say it to you. I say it to you. I say it to our audience at home. And I'm not saying it with necessarily pride, but it is true for me. I throw away plastic bags.

[David]

All of them.

[Clark Jones]

No, like how many at a time. And like, what's the cap?

[Langston Kerman]

Sometimes. Sometimes I'll go grocery shopping and let's say we get about seven of them things. About two or three of them. They going in the recycling.

[David]

I think that's so. Cause listen, man, I think you only need a plastics bag full of plastic bags.

[Clark Jones]

Wait, you throw S's on words. They don't need them too. It's an indigenous black person thing.

[David]

I wish you this. You guys are interlopers.

[Clark Jones]

It feels real. Cuz your button is button to the top. Anything you accuse me of, I did it.

[David]

This is my to.

[Clark Jones]

That's when the don't know what foray means. He just calls it his to.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

I enter my to into accusatory politics.

[David]

This is my TO into journalism.

[Clark Jones]

Oh my God.

[David]

But Truly the way I feel, you only need one plastic bag worth of plastic bags.

[Langston Kerman]

And I think that there has been.

[David]

But the outer shell bag has gotta be one of the good bags. I'm not talking grocery store. I'm talking maybe clothing store. That type of thick plastic bag. Then you fill that full of grocery store bags.

[Langston Kerman]

Sturdy motherfucker gets filled with a bunch of flimsy motherfuckers.

[David]

And that's about how many plastic bags I need in those.

[Clark Jones]

Ralph's thick, thick ones are very small, they are sturdy. But you're only getting like five or six bags in there.

[David]

Yeah, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

It's like leather plastic.

[David]

Yeah, that's a little too thick. Or you know the.

[Clark Jones]

You know what I did say about no black Fan out.

[Langston Kerman]

That's too much ass.

[Clark Jones]

Wait, wait, wait.

[David]

I need that to be known right now. That's not what we're talking about. You women's in verbozzi. Allow me to have a toray into a different topic.

[Clark Jones]

But to your point, and this is a soft toss into the whole conspiracy theory, I think the color of the plastic bags in your neighborhood lets you know your economic standing. Oh, because black plastic bags are a little bit. That's the highest of the beauty supply in your neighborhood. Oh, like financial state. The clear is. That's the lowest. And what else you got?

[David]

You got brown, you got the light white too.

[Clark Jones]

Light white.

[David]

You know what I'm saying?

[Clark Jones]

But black is like. Oh, that's like gray.

[David]

Gray.

[Clark Jones]

Respect to it.

[Langston Kerman]

Now, when we're talking about this, I assume you're speaking specifically about like beauty supply.

[Clark Jones]

Beauty supply.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay. Cause grocery store, if you hand me a black bag, this is the poorest grocery store I've ever been to.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, it's the highest of the poor neighborhoods, but it's the lowest of a good neighborhood. So like, you just move there, you find a spot with the black. Oh, okay. This is like. What's the beauty place that has commercials?

[David]

Sally's Sally.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, right, right, right. Sally might give you a black plastic bag. But the best beauty supply, like the factory joint with like immigrants.

[David]

When it's like the Korean warehouse.

[Langston Kerman]

Yes.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. But it got everything you need. Remote control cars with the high end thinner.

[David]

Yeah, I know, I know. Exactly speaking my shit.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, yeah. That blue plastic bag is. So there's nothing in there. It's like Blue Magic. It's like the Eagle Rock Target. Like it's just three T shirts.

[Langston Kerman]

And a lot of our listeners will relate to that reference.

[Clark Jones]

I'm saying when they visit. When they visit now. Cause when you come to la, you don't stay downtown anymore.

[Langston Kerman]

And you got to hit that Eagle Rock down.

[Clark Jones]

You gotta hit that with the open flame, open pit right in the. Oh. Some of the best street meats meet in the. In the city. I'm dead ass. Y' all been there, man. Come on, stop acting like y'.

[David Bore]

All.

[David]

He's talking about ass. Some of the best street meats.

[Clark Jones]

That's some of the best street meats in the city. When you stay with your cousin to come see la, go to the Eagle Rock. Target right next to the. Yeah, they got the. Your girl.

[David]

All right, we don't. What are we talking about?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, I rambled.

[David]

How to get to the Eagle Rock. They're not going right up the highway.

[Clark Jones]

You don't think they will?

[David]

They got a Popeyes right there. This is gonna be the Zenku chicken.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[David]

Which is.

[Langston Kerman]

What is the guy who works at Zenku? His name is Mike. I've talked to him quite a bit. He's pretty cool. But his dad is Ralph. Ralph is an asshole.

[David]

He don't work Thursdays.

[Clark Jones]

Listen, it's by Issa Rae Coffee shop. So I know white people know where it's at.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay. What I have felt in this conversation is a little bit of peace, I guess, in that.

[David]

Yeah, you should. I think you're okay.

[Langston Kerman]

I think there has been sort of like, this campaign that to throw away a plastic bag is anti black somehow.

[David]

Right.

[Langston Kerman]

And I don't think that that's true. And I think we gotta free ourselves from those expectations.

[David]

How many containers do you need? At some point.

[Langston Kerman]

At some point, you gotta give something away.

[David]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Huh. I think that it depends on, like, I need a rolling start on, like, anti black. You can't just do one thing right. So as far as napkins go, like, what's your stance on that? Do you collect them still? Are you doodling?

[David]

Are you throwing?

[Clark Jones]

Are you using them all? Yeah. Are they in the. Like, the utensil? Like, how. What's your stance on that?

[David]

It's in the utensil drawer.

[Clark Jones]

You still have the napkins?

[David]

Oh, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

I keep my napkins.

[Clark Jones]

Okay. Well, yeah. You still black then, man?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Like, two of those. Throwing away plastic bags and not having napkins, all purpose. That coon card, you gonna throw it on, you're done.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[David]

How many packets of honey do you have in your spice drawer?

[Langston Kerman]

More than I would like.

[David]

Yeah, same.

[Langston Kerman]

I would say an obstructive amount.

[David]

Yeah, but we get all this honey.

[Clark Jones]

From honey sauce, they call it. Why is it honey sauce.

[Langston Kerman]

Cause it can't be real honey.

[Clark Jones]

Legally, he ate just some honey.

[David]

What we did to this shit, we.

[Langston Kerman]

Can'T call this honey.

[Clark Jones]

We put some sauce on it. It's sweet.

[Langston Kerman]

I will say that I am the one that eventually throws stuff away in my home though.

[David]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Like if it were not for me, eventually our home would be overrun with plastic bags and honey packs.

[David]

But I think that's just you being a father, a provider, a leader of a household.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay. I like the way you're phrasing.

[Clark Jones]

This is new father shit. Getting rid of stuff. That's the dad. The new millennial dad way.

[Langston Kerman]

That's how I'm trying to get. I'm gonna get rid of the family eventually. It's gonna be a pretty house.

[Clark Jones]

Just stamping. Thank you, thank you, thank you. On your kids. Like you gotta go too. Any people thank you on it. Gotta go.

[David]

No. You just can only hoard so many resources.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David]

You know what I mean? And like it's like we're acting like plastic bag billionaires.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David]

We're doing the same thing. Right. But you gotta release some of it back into the community.

[Langston Kerman]

I think that's fair.

[Clark Jones]

The value will never go up on plastic bags.

[Langston Kerman]

No.

[Clark Jones]

There's no long term plan with this.

[Langston Kerman]

No. Watch next week there's gonna be like a famine. And then suddenly plastic bags are gonna be this essential resource.

[Clark Jones]

Well, they are just document.

[David]

I also do have stashes of plastic bags around my house. As one would do with like drug money.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David]

I just got like. There's like a tote bag full of plastic bags.

[Langston Kerman]

Plastic bags under your mattress?

[Clark Jones]

Just that one suitcase you never use.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David]

It's like in a ceiling tile.

[Langston Kerman]

Somebody knocks on the door, you're flushing plastic bags down the toilet. What did you do?

[David]

I threw it out.

[Clark Jones]

Why? They would have never found Karen. I had to throw it out. They were going to get us.

[Langston Kerman]

All right. Our guest today. I think we did as much as we could do.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. They know what the most about the introduction. There's nothing more.

[Langston Kerman]

Our guest today, he hails from Chicago, Illinois. He's a dear friend, a hilarious comedian. You know him from so many things. The fucking best. Give it up, Clark Jones.

[Clark Jones]

I blow your God damn head. Smooth off.

[David]

That's pretty good.

[Clark Jones]

Oh man, I love this. I feel like for this is showing the age. I feel like the wonder years. Like the older sister.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

That seen some shit in the world and comes back to tell Kevin and the other brother. What's the other brother's name?

[David]

Wayne.

[Clark Jones]

Wayne. Wayne. I don't know which one is Kevin or Wayne between you guys.

[David]

I don't know.

[Clark Jones]

Because whoever's doing better is Kevin at that point in time. Cause y' all be trading off. Y' all really be elevating each other, man.

[David]

That's what I said.

[Langston Kerman]

I think we leave that to the audience to see.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. And the Reddit. The Reddit, definitely.

[David]

Even in that point. We don't trust them. Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[David Bore]

What about listening to them for.

[David]

Yeah, y' all listen to us. It's already backwards.

[Clark Jones]

Yep. Street is talking about the My Mama Said podcast.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. And that is what it's called.

[Clark Jones]

My Mama Said.

[Langston Kerman]

That's what we've been calling it this whole time.

[David]

That's what every host that of a comedy show I've done in the last.

[Langston Kerman]

Six months since My Mama Said.

[David]

My mama.

[Clark Jones]

My Mama Said.

[David]

And then it starts. Confident. It's like he's the host of the My Mama Is Going to Tell podcast.

[Langston Kerman]

My Mama Was There When It Happened podcast.

[David]

He's on the Don't Wake Daddy podcast.

[Clark Jones]

My daddy was on some bullshit. Y'. All. Y' all make some noise right now. Come on now. It's beautiful. I think that was my name.

[Langston Kerman]

We have reached a point of success where people are somehow aware that we exist and also not aware enough to invest in learning the important details of they don't care.

[David]

And that's okay.

[Clark Jones]

Place to be.

[Langston Kerman]

I think it's a beautiful place to be.

[Clark Jones]

I've learned people don't care when I had Classic Black dude no matter what on the podcast. Like me just now, man. I love classic. What's it? Classic Bros. The classic Black Bros. Yeah, man. Like, whatever the audience wants is what the host is gonna give. Whatever, you know, whatever sounds right.

[Langston Kerman]

And we are some hoes. If you want us to change the name.

[Clark Jones]

Come on, man.

[Langston Kerman]

Pitch a good one.

[David]

Honestly. 10 racks. You can name it.

[Langston Kerman]

You can name the podcast.

[Clark Jones]

Y' all name the price. We're naming the podcast $10,000. You agree? You co sign it.

[Langston Kerman]

You will be an executive tonight.

[Clark Jones]

A piece total. 10 piece.

[David]

If I were to check. Oh, that's.

[Langston Kerman]

It's your podcast, baby.

[David]

Come on.

[Clark Jones]

There's been a change.

[Langston Kerman]

A toast to the new host.

[David]

I think you really. My Mama said you greatly overestimate. We're making.

[Clark Jones]

Welcome back to Black what the, Man. We here new host.

[David]

What the folks.

[Clark Jones]

Black what the stars. All right, man, we're back.

[Langston Kerman]

Clark, you came to us with a conspiracy theory that. That when David and I heard it, we both got very excited.

[Clark Jones]

About it.

[David]

This is going to be good.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, I was very nervous about it.

[Langston Kerman]

I was like you said. My mama told me porn sites secretly take photos of users to potentially blackmail you later. I'd rather check myself before I wreck myself. That's right.

[Clark Jones]

There is a database of O faces. Oh, man. Much like Twitter used to keep a record of all. I mean, the Library of Congress used to keep a record of all tweets, I think, up until 2015. Really?

[David]

I didn't know that.

[Clark Jones]

You didn't know that?

[David]

No.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. You didn't know they started or that they stopped? No, no, no, no. Yeah, no.

[David]

I've been on Twitter for a while.

[Clark Jones]

Me too. But I still keep up with the news. And no matter what. That's another one. No matter what they call it, It's Twitter, right?

[David]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Somebody like, they was like. Like even on Truth, they were like, oh, the President tweeted this. I'm like, that's.

[David]

Wait, you were on Truth too?

[Clark Jones]

Well, they. People, people who supposedly hate him keep talking about stuff that he tweets from that. That garbage ass website.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

But yeah, no, I think there is a. What's more damning, what's scarier from Yalls own experience from hearing the conspiracy theory than you getting out of line and them just having you, your O face ready out there. I don't have a. I'm disheveled. No. I'm ashy. Some of the worst. Like, I just don't care. And it's coming like. Like that. What's that called?

[David]

Area. Do you think your old face is gonna be that surprising to anybody?

[Clark Jones]

I think my looking for porn face is probably the ugliest face.

[David]

But that's different than your O face though.

[Clark Jones]

It's a running. It's a running every.

[David]

Cause the looking, the looking, the looking.

[Langston Kerman]

The frenzied looking, the desperation.

[Clark Jones]

I gotta go to sleep in five minutes.

[David]

That's a worry because I caught myself in the light. Like, oh no. Like when you see what's going on for real.

[Langston Kerman]

I think the real bummer is if they get the footage of you walking to get a tissue after because you didn't set up properly.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Oh man.

[Langston Kerman]

They just get that sad fucking stumble.

[Clark Jones]

Like, oh man, should I shower tonight or wait till the morning? Like the content after any of those. There's no like good porn interaction face.

[Langston Kerman]

No, no, I.

[David]

Do you think this is specifically for men or do you think it also goes for women?

[Clark Jones]

I don't think women make faces when they orgasm.

[David]

So.

[Clark Jones]

Joking. Come on, guys.

[Langston Kerman]

Brother, I Was terrified.

[David]

Guys, I ain't playing knuckle.

[Clark Jones]

David did a demonstrative. He's doing Red Fox.

[David]

Yo.

[Clark Jones]

He's doing Red Fox.

[David]

Harriet, I'm coming to join you, honey. Harriet.

[Clark Jones]

So funny. Elizabeth.

[Langston Kerman]

Elizabeth.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, Black people call it. We need to call her name. That's true.

[David]

That's true. And that was my foray into impressions. My toray into impressions.

[Langston Kerman]

I was very worried about you. I'm glad you know the difference.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, I think just women are just more careful about everything. Like they actually paying for everything. So you don't get that random blink flashing. You don't see that flashing white light you get when you go to the wrong. Like those really like dirty grungy, like the pop up. That's when they get you.

[Langston Kerman]

Oh, you think it's.

[David]

You're clicking on the games.

[Clark Jones]

Like, not intentionally. They make it impossible not to. There's no X button. Where's the X button? There's no X button.

[David]

I'm trying to see Lois from favorite guy Bundle, man.

[Clark Jones]

That dude. Well, whoever introduced that, like, what research did they do? They're like, yo, motherfuckers want to see love.

[Langston Kerman]

Everybody want to see love.

[Clark Jones]

Marge is out. We need Lois in here. And those two. I mean, Lois, if a real person, you know, would you single, no kids, would y'. All. A real life Lois.

[Langston Kerman]

It is not. It is not out of the realm of possibility. It just feels like an imagination game I played many years ago.

[Clark Jones]

Okay.

[David]

Oh, it took you back to a spot.

[Clark Jones]

It's something that you have a path you have crossed mentally.

[Langston Kerman]

This feels like some shit that I was doing in like 10th grade where I was like, what if Lois was real?

[Clark Jones]

Right.

[Langston Kerman]

It's like I've seen human women now. So I. You know what I mean? I'm not like. I'm not like seeking out Lois anymore because I was like, oh, I've seen.

[Clark Jones]

They know what we like, man. Fucking Seth MacFarlane. He knows black people. He does. He's done so well. I'm being full of shit right now, but you know. Yeah, no, Seth MacFarlane, he knows black people.

[Langston Kerman]

He knows black people.

[Clark Jones]

You got. But you were in Boston, right? You did.

[Langston Kerman]

I lived there for. Yeah, three years, man.

[Clark Jones]

Looking back at it now, it seems like so much more. But anyway, yeah, they. I think that's the blackmail. That. That's like the last ditch effort.

[Langston Kerman]

I will say, if you get out.

[David]

Of line, it is tough to like. It's so much vulnerable than even like a dick picture leaking.

[Langston Kerman]

I think.

[David]

I think the, like, that's Like. Cause you control that. You set that light up the.

[Langston Kerman]

I bet the information they're releasing isn't just the photo. I bet, like, they will track everything that you're looking at and sort of consuming the things that you engage with. And then ideally are using all of that as blackmail information.

[David]

I'm most worried about the words I put in to find what I got.

[Langston Kerman]

Absolutely.

[Clark Jones]

For example? For example. Not today, baby. The government know I can't know.

[Langston Kerman]

The listeners can't.

[Clark Jones]

The government know, but the listeners.

[David]

But just let's say I try to get creative and it's not the space for experiments.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. Sometimes you just like, after. This is why you gotta leave when you're done. And when I say leave, I mean, like after you're done with ever stuff you're doing, you can't just be like, still on the stuff. Cause you'll start getting like, looking for.

[Langston Kerman]

Stuff, you know, Are people doing that?

[Clark Jones]

People stick around, really, and just be searching.

[Langston Kerman]

Whoa.

[David]

That's awful.

[Clark Jones]

That's sinister. That's worse. That's bad.

[David]

That's the worst shit I ever heard.

[Langston Kerman]

That's nasty.

[David]

Are you serious?

[Clark Jones]

No post nut clarity. There's gotta be somebody out there. No, there's somebody out there with no post nut clarity.

[Langston Kerman]

Crazy.

[Clark Jones]

They're just still as diabolical as they were.

[David]

That's an animal.

[Langston Kerman]

I guess I.

[David]

Would you put that guy in jail?

[Langston Kerman]

You live in a more cynical world than I, sir.

[David]

I never even thought of.

[Clark Jones]

Hey, I'd be in the streets, man.

[Langston Kerman]

To me, it always seemed like a rule. A fact of the world is that after you finish, you close that as fast as you can, you swipe up, you get the fuck out of there as quickly as you possibly can.

[David]

After I finish. It looks crazy to me.

[Langston Kerman]

It looks nuts.

[David]

I'm like, oh, why would I look at this?

[Clark Jones]

I gotta get off YouTube.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm a distinguished gentleman. Why would I be looking at this?

[David]

Harriet.

[Clark Jones]

I'm coming.

[David]

Yeah. No, that really made my blood run cold. That's like.

[Clark Jones]

That would be one of the more. More terrifying conditions if I did not have post night clarity.

[Langston Kerman]

I think you gotta have that.

[David]

Yeah, you gotta.

[Clark Jones]

It's possible somebody's out there. Just like room, you know, you have.

[David]

To be like, whoa.

[Langston Kerman]

Although I guess that is what gooning is, is that they're surrounding themselves, speeding through the lights. Well, gooning, as I understand it, is the people who. And I'm sorry that I have to keep you guys hip. I am very.

[Clark Jones]

No, I know what gooning is.

[Langston Kerman]

I am very connected to the youth.

[Clark Jones]

I see it, but I don't quite know exactly.

[Langston Kerman]

Gooning is when you make porn and sort of like all the. That are your like fucking the things you beat off to. Like a fully immersive experience. Like you are surrounding yourself with screens and like pictures and like lock. Like there are goon caves where people.

[Clark Jones]

You're like comfortable and you're.

[Langston Kerman]

You're sort of like pushing yourself to the maximum. Like come to the maximum.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, like the 3D goggles you can.

[Langston Kerman]

But I think you want it. The cave is supposed to be like more like an IMAX situation.

[David]

It's like Minority Report.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, it is.

[Clark Jones]

Your head here is from Truman Show.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Cut to the money shot. Do it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, but you're yelling at you the whole time.

[Clark Jones]

Oh, you're the only person in the room.

[Langston Kerman]

You're the only person gooning. I think by yourself.

[David]

That's dark.

[Langston Kerman]

And I think I have to assume that when those dudes are finished, they are assembling a new wall of goon tastic materials.

[Clark Jones]

You gotta keep pushing yourself, man. And I just don't know. I don't know how, but there's. There's always another. There's always another floor that you haven't been to.

[Langston Kerman]

That's right.

[David]

You know what? No.

[Clark Jones]

You think there's a. You think there's a.

[David]

No, no, no. I think yeah, at some point. I like this floor.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, I think so.

[Clark Jones]

No, man, that's. There's always gonna be some shit you.

[David]

Haven'T put your dick in. There's just so much shit. You got one dick.

[Clark Jones]

See, now your shit's coming out. Let's talk about it. There's always something you haven't put your dick in.

[Langston Kerman]

I think that's what they're. The goons. That's what they're thinking is like there is more to be goon.

[David]

And that's what I'm saying. It's like. It's like at some point you gotta be your own restrict. Because there's no. There's no max. It's a game you can't beat. It's fucking golf, dog. There's like.

[Langston Kerman]

You can't.

[Clark Jones]

I don't think.

[David]

And after a while, then like golf, you're only gooning against yourself.

[Langston Kerman]

That's true.

[David]

You're only gooning. It's not like. It's not like it's a competition in a real way. It's like. And now if you're just gooning for what you're. That's limitless. That's like you're gonna lose a lot of money.

[Langston Kerman]

And even the community you could share this with is not an ideal sect of people.

[David]

No.

[Langston Kerman]

This isn't like the type of people who are pushing you forward in any other part of your life.

[David]

No, no.

[Clark Jones]

You can't use your real name to talk about this stuff. There has to be numbers involved.

[Langston Kerman]

I have seen a documentary where. About gooning specifically where the person who is the gooner is in a mask the whole time.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Because he should be as they should.

[David]

We should make them wear. We should make them wear scarlet letters.

[Clark Jones]

G. G. What would the letter be? It would be G. It has to.

[David]

Be G. And then they'll do an underground like the Christians with the fish. Like one guy will lay down, he'll just do a half a G in the sand and the other guy finishes it.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Hands all sticky together.

[Clark Jones]

Strong hands. You gotta be around.

[David]

You're hurting me. You're hurting me.

[Clark Jones]

You think it's like goons, man?

[David]

No, no, no formal goons. No. Not even.

[Clark Jones]

No T shirt with a G crossed out.

[Langston Kerman]

He.

[Clark Jones]

I wouldn't do that.

[Langston Kerman]

The only thing I goon is the Lord.

[Clark Jones]

That's it.

[Langston Kerman]

You know what I mean?

[Clark Jones]

That's it.

[Langston Kerman]

Surround me.

[Clark Jones]

Left hand up.

[Langston Kerman]

Surround me.

[David]

You look at his search history.

[Langston Kerman]

Gooning the Lord. Let's see.

[Clark Jones]

They gonna use that.

[Langston Kerman]

Let's see what Google use that when.

[Clark Jones]

You run for comptroller of Los Angeles third district.

[Langston Kerman]

Let's see what Google has in mind for me. Goon and the Lord.

[Clark Jones]

That's what be. That's hilarious. That's what be getting me. Like they finding out like comments. People like that one dude in North Carolina when they found out his comments he made on porn sites that were anti MLK in the South.

[David]

Also though. What are you doing commenting?

[Clark Jones]

What are you doing commenting? What are you doing?

[Langston Kerman]

Being political already a bad sign to talk to.

[Clark Jones]

I understand the. Okay, what's her at? Cool. That's the most. That's the most.

[Langston Kerman]

You heard it here first, folks. This comments on porn.

[Clark Jones]

No, I read comments on them sometimes I'm finished and I can't. This nigga. Sometimes, yo. Sometimes you close like 20 windows at once and you run across a comment. I'm not saying me. I'm saying in the logical realm of this brother is hitting porn sites is the most commonly. I did research for this episode. Unlike y'. All. I did research. I'm a good guess. The most commonly used phrase is not fuck mlk. What's her act? I looked it up.

[Langston Kerman]

Damn.

[Clark Jones]

Because I don't know why people would be making comments. Those are the people who don't have post not clarity. They stay, they stick around. They build an actual true profile.

[Langston Kerman]

It's a genuinely sad thing.

[David]

Yeah, it is. Real credit guy. That's when you're like, oh, adults really don't have friends, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

If you're creating community around this thing that everybody is ashamed of, for better or worse, we all sort of bear this shame about sex and sexuality, especially in the privacy of our own homes.

[Clark Jones]

Don't be trying to use your University of Michigan voice to talk about this dastardly shit, brother.

[David]

Stop that.

[Clark Jones]

Stop that.

[Langston Kerman]

We just turn on each other in every comment.

[Clark Jones]

You will not clash this conversation. Nope, nope, nope. I bet. And I know this is gonna make the episode very too relevant to current times, but I bet that University of Michigan coach has, like, uses his University of Michigan email to sign up for porn things.

[Langston Kerman]

That's a brother that comments.

[Clark Jones]

That's a brother that comments.

[Langston Kerman]

And that is how you find yourself in the troubling situation that he's found himself in.

[Clark Jones]

Every mistake that can't be made, he will make it. Yeah, I've noticed there are people still out there throwing. At one point, he was the head of a very respected program. Yeah, Shout out to Ohio, too. No disrespect.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't think we have to shout them out. I went to the school. None of us went to Ohio State. Chill out.

[David]

That's true.

[Clark Jones]

I get money in Cleveland, though.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[Clark Jones]

I'm Gary Cameron. Remember that. Get it in Ohio.

[Langston Kerman]

That ain't the city.

[Clark Jones]

That's the difference. That's the difference.

[David Bore]

That's the difference.

[Clark Jones]

Amen.

[David]

Columbus now the biggest city in Ohio.

[Langston Kerman]

Whoa. Past Cleveland. Damn.

[Clark Jones]

Really? Yeah. Yeah, man, that downtown is rough, though.

[David]

Columbus or Cleveland?

[Clark Jones]

Columbus.

[David]

Yeah, I went to a bar down there last time I was doing gigs, and it was like, me. My opener was way more on it. He was like, I think we gotta get outta here.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, man, they closed. Like, it was like a black art store down there. That was like, look, man, we gotta get rid of all this shit. It's like, is that Langston Hughes's old diary? Like, like, shit, what you want? Make me an offer. It was like a dollar for the authentic love letters from Dr. King to Coretta.

[Langston Kerman]

Look, bro, if we don't get out by five, they gonna kill us.

[Clark Jones]

They gonna kill you.

[Langston Kerman]

We about to be dead, so, yeah.

[Clark Jones]

We gonna lose more than this store. But it was. Yeah, that's great, though. Columbus.

[Langston Kerman]

Before we go to break, I. I have to Ask. Do you feel like this is gonna slow down your consumption?

[Clark Jones]

It already has.

[David]

Okay.

[Clark Jones]

It's like I'm down to eight screens. It already has. I'm, like, in a relationship. Like, life is looking up now. Yeah, yeah.

[David]

Once you got out the goon cave.

[Clark Jones]

I'm an extremist man. Like, if I'm gonna stop looking at porn sites, I'm allowed to be a viable relationship person and that. They all work together. Yeah. Shout out to the ladies out there, making the men in this room very happy.

[David]

Shout out.

[Langston Kerman]

Shout out.

[David]

Not a big listener.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

What if they're the only listener?

[David]

Does Nikki actually listen to episodes?

[Langston Kerman]

No, but she. She is such a. A dedicated partner that she will reshare everything she does. She reshares every single thing we do, regardless of whether or not she's gonna consume this. She's like, yep, go crazy.

[David]

Appreciate that.

[Langston Kerman]

Proud of them and. Yeah, I appreciate it. So you're saying. You're saying it's more your partnership that made you pull back than the actual, like.

[Clark Jones]

Well, no. Pulling back has led me to be a better man. Yeah, like. And I'm talking about, like, immediately. Like, 80s, bald fade. No, gradual. It was like, I'm not doing that anymore. Let me jump immediate into how life can be better now. Now that I have time to do shit. Yeah, it's cool. It's better. Like, real sex is way better. Yeah, don't listen to that one weird kid with the suit. The Mexican kid with the suit who's a virgin. Nick Fuentes.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

No, no, no, don't listen to him. Sex is good.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. Mexican is not how I describe him.

[Clark Jones]

Fuentes.

[Langston Kerman]

Hispanic for sure, but white supremacist is.

[Clark Jones]

More about what he.

[David]

Way to describe Nick Fuentes as the one kid with the suit.

[Clark Jones]

The crazy Mexican with the suit.

[Langston Kerman]

He is rooted in the most kind of hate.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, the worst hate.

[Langston Kerman]

That's usually how I get people to be like, oh, Nick Fuentes.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. White supremacist. Yeah, yeah. What does he talk. I never listened to him. What's his name?

[David]

He is.

[Langston Kerman]

He is not on our side. Yeah, he's pretty vocal about it. And the one bites the dust. Damn, we almost had him, huh?

[David]

Almost had him.

[Langston Kerman]

We almost had that cool ass dude.

[Clark Jones]

Fuck yeah, man. I just.

[Langston Kerman]

Fuck, we really wanted to hang out with you, Nick Fuentes.

[Clark Jones]

He could. He would. He. He should name the podcast. I know. He got $10,000.

[David]

Now it's 20.

[Clark Jones]

Now it's 20. The price went up.

[Langston Kerman]

The price.

[Clark Jones]

Yesterday's price is not today.

[Langston Kerman]

It's not today's price.

[David]

Oh, my God.

[Clark Jones]

That's. My biggest fear is to become Fat Joe as a guest on the podcast and just over talk. So I'm gonna show.

[Langston Kerman]

Fat Joe, I think has somehow turned into a better podcaster than he ever was a musician.

[David]

I think it's so. I like hearing him talk.

[Clark Jones]

You like him cutting people off.

[David]

I just. I just like. I watch his clips though. I don't watch. I don't listen to any podcast.

[Clark Jones]

Ah, okay.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[David]

So I just hear it like him say something and then Jada kiss. Like it wasn't open or whatever.

[Clark Jones]

Him. Yo, it wasn't even like that.

[David]

Yeah, that's pretty good. That was really good.

[Clark Jones]

Tell. Yeah. How it was. Yeah. But I'mma just. Okay. Any. It could be any subject. Fat Joe has a story of him doing that.

[Langston Kerman]

It's really. He. He's a. He's a beautiful liar.

[Clark Jones]

It's the ketamine, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

He tells the best stories. And also he looks insane. Like just the whole aesthetic is fucking wild. From the beginning. He's in a Pelly Peli jacket inside always.

[Clark Jones]

Yes.

[Langston Kerman]

It's the fucking best. I can't get enough of Fat Joe as a talker.

[David]

I love a character.

[Langston Kerman]

I wasn't interested in him as a. But as a character. This is a very funny dude.

[David]

I liked a couple songs. What's Love. I liked that song for him.

[Langston Kerman]

Or was it? Cause he had a fun hook? Yeah.

[David]

I like that lifestyle song. You don't really wanna live. Never seen a brick. Never seen a crack house. I like that song. That's pretty good.

[Clark Jones]

I like New York. New York.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

See, and that wasn't even really his shit. But he acted like it was.

[David]

He was in there.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm saying he was real podcast. I wasn't mad at him being on song. But nobody is talking about the albums in the catalog.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, I know. Still Envy. I know. No album cuts of Fat Joe.

[David]

No.

[David Bore]

Like deep.

[Langston Kerman]

He's nobody's favorite rapper. So it's dope that he could be somebody's favorite. Old man talking into a microphone.

[Clark Jones]

Amen. And he's the only one using the brown Beijing. That's different. But most people got the black Beijing filling in. So he's good.

[David]

That's funny. I never even thought about other colors of Beijing.

[Clark Jones]

He got the light brown one. He did get that light brown in the black plastic bag. You go to a good beauty supply.

[Langston Kerman]

And they're never gonna run out of.

[Clark Jones]

Supply on his shit. Never.

[Langston Kerman]

He's.

[Clark Jones]

He's fine.

[David]

Are you guys. As we get older, are you guys thinking about enhancements ever? Like, when he asks, do you ever.

[Langston Kerman]

Like, I don't want it.

[David]

I don't either. I say no. But last. The last time he asked me was the first time I was like, maybe.

[Clark Jones]

In New York, they weren't asking. In Chicago, they weren't asking. Like, when it came to Beijing in New York, they weren't asking like, they were doing the eyebrows. Did y' all ever have that in Brooklyn?

[Langston Kerman]

They cut up your eyebrows. Eyebrows.

[Clark Jones]

The Dominican barbers.

[David]

Oh, three slices.

[Clark Jones]

Not even three slices. They would arch my.

[David]

While out.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, they would hit you, like, trying to. Trying to. Trying to be out. Like, they were really. Yeah, they were crazy. They were arching eyebrows in. In Bushwick, Brooklyn, I think I got.

[Langston Kerman]

Asked once by my Dominican barber, and I was like, nah. And then we never talked about it again.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, you just went to the one down the street. Every three doors is a. I was.

[Langston Kerman]

Like, now I'm never leaving you, because, you know, so I don't do that.

[David]

Yeah, that's true.

[Langston Kerman]

Now we got a good, consistent rhythm here.

[David]

You guys understand each other?

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, yeah. Nah, I don't right now. It's a. You know, I like what I got and chick fuck with it, so I don't want no extra.

[Langston Kerman]

No porn, no archdiocese.

[David]

Come on.

[Clark Jones]

No brown Beijing, no enhancements.

[David]

One scream, one love, one heart, one mic.

[Clark Jones]

One love, one shot time. Saying nothing like that.

[Langston Kerman]

33 crackheads in the park after dark minus one, that's Jesus.

[Clark Jones]

Yo, hold up. Let me finish, let me finish.

[David]

I love it when they say, hold.

[Clark Jones]

Up, hold up, hold up. I said. I said battle rap is.

[David]

Battle rap is the funniest rap. It is.

[Langston Kerman]

It's funny when they get mad because people are laughing at their joke.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, yeah. Come on, man. Let me finish this.

[David]

We.

[Clark Jones]

We're talking about the exact same rapper, too. He wears a suit. I forget his name. It's escaping me. But him check out oh, Solo, bring two, three.

[David]

That I don't understand why it's good, but I've seen that clip so many times, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

He went crazy.

[Clark Jones]

He is the best.

[David]

And then I've seen clips where they're like, let me do the. Oh, Solo. And I'm like, no, I don't really. I think I got it.

[Clark Jones]

He's super humble, too.

[David]

I think that's what he meant when he did it the first time.

[Clark Jones]

If you post on one of his videos, he replies like, it's 2012. IG.

[David]

Whoa.

[Clark Jones]

Like, he like, hey, thank you, God. I really Appreciate that. I'm like, man, why you. You doing this for everybody or just me? You know what I mean? Like, I did a little joke, but, like, no, he's super cool cat man, and very, very, very funny.

[David]

I don't know any other verses besides that. Hey, Michael's Brandy.

[Clark Jones]

Go down that clickhole, man of O solo battle raps. You. You won't regret it.

[Langston Kerman]

I have my battle rap era.

[Clark Jones]

I, I, you done?

[Langston Kerman]

I, I, I just don't tap back in the way I should anymore.

[David]

Was it like king of the Dot Time. Time frame?

[Langston Kerman]

I, I think when I was doing it, Cassidy was still.

[David]

Oh, you were doing. No, no, no, no, no.

[Langston Kerman]

Not participating, but just sort of when I was investing. It was sort of that era of like, he was still.

[David]

Yeah, but was.

[Clark Jones]

So was that a fork in a row for you? Because you were doing slam poetry.

[Langston Kerman]

That's true.

[Clark Jones]

And so you could either become a battle rapper or a comedian.

[David]

That's two very different lines.

[Clark Jones]

I don't think that's the fork.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't think comedian is as much of a factor in slam as people think it is. I don't think people are, like, often being like, oh, I'm gonna pivot this into comedy. As much as it would seem like a natural segue, I do think a lot of people see themselves as rappers. I was very certain I was not that from the beginning, I was like, I'm not a rapper. I never wanna be a rapper. At one point, I aspired to be, like, a producer more than I wanted to be a rapper. I was like, oh, I'm gonna make beats. And I got my parents to buy me turntables for Christmas and shit. And then couldn't figure it out.

[David]

And I was like, you know, what's so crazy? Similar story.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, I could see you DJing.

[David]

Yeah. I really thought it was my. And then I provided, begged, probably for maybe a year and a half.

[Langston Kerman]

Same.

[David]

And then they came and I. I snapped. One of the belts.

[Clark Jones]

Was going too hard.

[David]

Immediately, I got him downstairs.

[Langston Kerman]

That's not scratching.

[David]

Yeah, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

That'S putting a dent in it.

[David]

And then I was. Yo, I got embarrassed to ask for more. I was just like, they're not gonna give me any more shit. I don't have any money. And I busted it in, like, two days.

[Langston Kerman]

That's nuts.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, busted the belt on the. That is ins. I have never heard anyone say that they did that before.

[David]

Yeah, it wasn't cool, man.

[Langston Kerman]

No, there was me and there was one other dude in my neighborhood who, like, also had turntables. And we would, like, try to practice together every once in a while. And he was getting, getting. He was seeing forward progress.

[Clark Jones]

He was getting good at it in.

[Langston Kerman]

A way that I was not. And I was like, oh, I. I don't think I have a skill for this.

[David]

Right.

[Clark Jones]

Okay.

[Langston Kerman]

I think especially if we're talking and this is before Internet, dj, whatever versions of the thing, this was just two classic ass turntables and like a two channel mixer, bro. I didn't have it. And I was like, nope, never mind.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Did you give your equipment to him?

[Langston Kerman]

No, he had his own equipment.

[Clark Jones]

Listen, man, I just want to help you on your journey. You know what I'm saying, brother?

[Langston Kerman]

I want to be a mentor to you.

[Clark Jones]

That's what I'm gonna do. I'm a manager. That's how I got into comedy. I told Will I was gonna manage him at first, really, to help him with his jokes.

[David]

So funny.

[Clark Jones]

And then I had wrote some that didn't fit. We talking about comedian Will Miles? Yeah, I. I had wrote something that didn't fit, like his voice, obviously. Him and I have different upbringings, and so I tried it, and that's how I got snapped into doing stuff.

[Langston Kerman]

That's crazy.

[David]

How old were you guys? You guys were. Cause you guys went to high school together, right?

[Clark Jones]

Went to high school, went to college. Both started teaching. So we, like, early 20s when he first started doing improv. And then he was like, well, I'm gonna do some stand. They say you gotta do standup, too. And I was like, all right, well, I'll write you some. Cause I was a journalist.

[Langston Kerman]

Journalism.

[Clark Jones]

Master's student. Master's degree. What. What do you call it? Candidate. Yeah. And I was like, I'll just write.

[Langston Kerman]

Hey, it's your title, brother.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. All right. This is just a ketchup hang. If y'.

[David]

All.

[Clark Jones]

You know, keep all this though, y'. All, this is gonna be important one day. But, yeah. So I was like, we don't have the budget. Not yet. But when that. When that money come in, Nick Fuentes.

[David]

Money, once we get that. 20 bands.

[Clark Jones]

They had 25 bands. Yeah, let's keep pushing. Yeah. No, I was just like, yeah, let me just write some stuff. And we both thought it was funny. We was like, this ain't gonna sound right coming for me. And then I did it, and that's how I started doing standup.

[Langston Kerman]

I will say that you were one of the first comedians that I ever saw at my first open mic was at that Doc Ryan's open Mic, that was all the way in Forest Park. You were driving very far to be there.

[Clark Jones]

I was driving. Dude, I know this ain't a comedy podcast. Maybe it is.

[Langston Kerman]

It don't matter.

[Clark Jones]

We ain't doing it. The mileage you put on your car to go just to get on that microphone, man.

[David]

Yeah. No. Y' all had cars when you started?

[Clark Jones]

Oh, yeah.

[David]

Okay.

[Clark Jones]

Can you not have a car in.

[David]

Denver like I started in San Francisco? You don't need a car at all.

[Clark Jones]

All those hills, though. Were you walking?

[David]

Here's the thing about San Francisco. The higher up the hill, the more money there is. So all the open mics, not at the top of the hill. They about to launch a lot of, like, SOMA missions. Like, not a lot of areas where you gotta, like, walk uphill.

[Clark Jones]

A lot of flatlands.

[David]

Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Damn. Yeah.

[David]

But a lot of bus miles, too.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

I feel safe on the San Francisco bus. I don't know what it is. I just. I like. I think I could do this. I think it's the full house effect.

[David]

Really? Anything besides the 91, the N, the owl? Everything besides the owl. I mean, like, you know, stuff happens on the bus because it's a city, but it's really not.

[Langston Kerman]

I like buses that are tied to the sky. You know how they're all. They're on the cable car. Yeah, well, they're just. They're. A lot of the San Francisco buses are, like on the stream, on the thing. Yeah.

[David]

On the wire. Yeah, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

To avoid gas and shit. And for whatever reason, that makes me feel like it's actually on a track.

[David]

Oh, interesting.

[Clark Jones]

Like more control situation than a bus that's just loose.

[David]

That's fair. They don't have a lot of loose buses.

[Langston Kerman]

There's not loose buses in San Francisco.

[David]

And then the above ground train is actually on the track.

[Langston Kerman]

It's on a track. Everything is on a track out there. And so in that on the bar.

[Clark Jones]

The BART is on it. Yeah.

[David]

Well, no, but there's also the muni trains above ground.

[Langston Kerman]

Like the trolley joints.

[David]

No, no, no. Trolleys are like, more for like, tourists. Because it just. It's like one part.

[Langston Kerman]

Right.

[David]

But there's like above ground trains, too.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That run in the street.

[David]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then on the outskirts of the city, and then during the middle of the city. This is so interesting.

[Clark Jones]

This all.

[David]

It's like there's three stops that are like. Or three or four stops in the middle of the city that are both BART and Munich. So I used to Take the muni train on those stops because you could just show a transfer Bart, they had killed old boy right when I got there. So I didn't really fuck. I didn't steal Bart like that. Wow.

[Clark Jones]

BART has a certain level of danger. Even as a Chicagoan that just was like, man, some.

[David]

There's cops for real down there. There's not really ever cops in the muni train stations. In the same way.

[Clark Jones]

It just didn't feel like it didn't like, at least know when the Chicago dude who is yelling, he's going to start. I know where the trouble's going to come from. Bart. I'm like, it could be that old lady with the kid. It could be anybody who's going to make my life a little bit dangerous. So I didn't. I couldn't. I couldn't grasp it. So, like, I did Ubers everywhere, every time I'm in San Francisco, man. But yeah, I just didn't. Something about that BART man, it just didn't feel the Bart man. It just didn't feel safe.

[Langston Kerman]

All right, well, I was on it. Heavy. I'll tell you this. Most of you don't give a fuck about nothing. We just talked about camaraderie, though, and that's okay. It's more about a relationship. It's about a bond. And you know what? Your porn is watching you. And we're going to talk more about that when we come. Come back more. Clark Jones. More. My mama told me.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

Hey, this is U.S. olympic gold medalist Tara Davis Woodhull.

[David Bore]

And I'm U.S. paralympic gold medalist Hunter Woodhull.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

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[David Bore]

A clear path and a team that you can absolutely trust.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

So when it came to getting the best mortgage, we chose PennyMac. PennyMac is proud to be the official mortgage provider of Team USA and you.

[David Bore]

Learn more at pennymac.com PennyMac Loan Services, LLC equal housing lender NMLS ID 35953 licensed by the Department of Financial Protection and Innovation under the California Residential Mortgage Lending Act. Conditions and restrictions may apply.

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[David Bore]

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[Langston Kerman]

Lenovo.

[Clark Jones]

Lenovo.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

Hi, I'm Cindy Crawford, and I'm the founder of meaningful beauty. When Dr. Sabah and I decided to do a skincare line together. Together, he said to me, we are going to give women meaningful beauty. And I said, that's exactly right. We want to give women meaningful beauty. Which means each and every product is meaningful. It has a. A reason to exist. It's efficacious. You're going to get results, and then you just go out and live your life. Meaningful beauty confidence is beautiful. Learn more@meaningful beauty.com.

[David Bore]

Hello.

[Clark Jones]

How are you? I am under the water. Please help me hear Too much raining.

[David]

Welcome to Too Madre Hablar Podcasto.

[Clark Jones]

Eat Mama podcast.

[David]

Yeah. I thought that was gonna hit so much. I was bad. I was like, these guys are gonna love it.

[Langston Kerman]

Really crazy.

[Clark Jones]

I wanted to see how far you was gonna go with it, man.

[David]

I was. I was gonna dig a deeper hole.

[Clark Jones]

For sure, brother.

[Langston Kerman]

I fumbled the intro. You fumbled that one.

[David]

It happened.

[Langston Kerman]

We all fumbled the intro.

[Clark Jones]

We get nervous around each other, man.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

We know too much about each other. Too talky, too chatty.

[David]

I'm also starting to remember people watch that, and that might be the undoing.

[Langston Kerman]

Of the podcast that we just leave our failures exposed for people to find.

[David]

Well, no, more that. Like, I come in here now knowing that a few people. Actually, I usually. The first year or two I was doing it with you, I literally operated like nobody ever looked while we were recording.

[Langston Kerman]

And that was true.

[David]

Yeah. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Oh, and now I remember sometimes that people are watching.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. You would podcast like, no one's watching.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Okay.

[David]

Live, laugh, love.

[Langston Kerman]

Speaking of watching, we're talking about the possibility that the government is watching us while we beat our meat.

[Clark Jones]

That white flash, man. People who really have been into it deep know what I'm talking about.

[David]

Yeah, you keep saying that. And I thought that I had watched pornography, but now I feel like I don't know what you're talking about.

[Clark Jones]

It's like them certain popups will get you. Cause I don't watch on my laptop. I've Never watched me either. Usually my laptops are, like, from.

[Langston Kerman]

No, I respect laptop.

[David]

Yeah. I don't. I only.

[Clark Jones]

It's a loner. So that would be. That would be. This has a class code on it. Yeah. They don't block anything because they want to catch you. So. So. So I don't even take a chance.

[David]

Next time you're here.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

They don't. Every school I worked at, they don't block any sites because they want to catch you.

[Langston Kerman]

All the teachers that wouldn't allow me to beat my. Me that night.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. That principal.

[Langston Kerman]

Look at me now. I beat my meat whenever I want.

[Clark Jones]

That IT department.

[Langston Kerman]

Mrs. Alexander.

[Clark Jones]

Why is it always Mrs. Alexander?

[David]

I also feel like the laptop screen.

[Clark Jones]

Is a little too big.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't need all that.

[Clark Jones]

I don't need too big for me.

[Langston Kerman]

I want to be focused.

[David]

Yeah. And I just don't need that much of it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Sometimes I want to get work done.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

I never really want to get work done on my phone. So it's like, yeah, just beat this thing up. I'm gonna get a pause. Just get a new win next year. But laptop. I've been holding on to mine for a little while.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah, man.

[Langston Kerman]

I. To the question of whether or not folks have been watching. I did. I found a Reddit, sort of talking about this exact issue. There is a person basically claiming that there is a new. Well, there's an article about it on techspot.com saying that new info stealer malware snaps webcam photos when you watch porn. Now, specifically, this malware, according to this article, says that the technology is that it's a feature within the malware, but the malware in it, sort of like breakdown says, we do not do this without your consent, that you would have to agree to have this happen. And that is where I go, shut the fuck up. Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Because no agreement is ever that short and direct. Like, you left out 17 paragraphs of a user agreement.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

We don't use this unless there's also. Have y' all been up on this new CIA dude, former CIA dude who's doing all these.

[Langston Kerman]

Nick Fuentes.

[Clark Jones]

Man, that nigga's resume is incredible.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, he got a great. Never had sex.

[Clark Jones]

Has worked with the cat.

[David]

First guy to ever do that.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. Just a crazy leap. No, this is guys saying, like, yes. He's just admitting stuff like, yeah, we will take your smart TV and put a camera in there or activate the camera that's already in there. He's just giving away all these secrets, man. About Actually murdering people, things like that. Not me. Him. And so that's what really activated me even wanting to talk. I'm like, okay, okay. If he's admitting to this, you know, that it's stuff even crazier that's already been done.

[Langston Kerman]

And I think there's no reason for this technology to exist otherwise. Do you know what I mean? Like, they have.

[David]

What's the point of it?

[Langston Kerman]

They have fucking cameras in your refrigerator now.

[Clark Jones]

Anything with smart in it. You're being watched.

[Langston Kerman]

That's solely to watch you.

[David]

That's equally as bad as my porn intake.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David]

I don't wanna see. I don't want you to see what I'm grabbing.

[Clark Jones]

No. Oh, my God.

[David]

How many times. I don't want you to know how long those tenders from Costco lasted. The way.

[Langston Kerman]

It's not just what I'm eating. It's the way I eat it.

[David]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want you to see what I grab after I grab the tenders.

[Langston Kerman]

I didn't want to.

[David]

Pairing it with.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah. Yo, he don't have no honey sauce left. What is he putting that cup.

[David]

Why is he eating olives with that?

[Langston Kerman]

You're looking at something that I wish no one would ever find.

[David]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Clark Jones]

That would be.

[David]

Yeah. I don't want him to see what my coffee just.

[Clark Jones]

Just people knowing what I forgot is in my fridge. But they know the whole time. But for 30 days, I don't even know. Oh, yeah, they tangerines.

[David]

They see how long I went before I went back for that ravioli. But then they see that I went back for that ravioli.

[Clark Jones]

They see you think about not going back for the ravioli.

[David]

We gotta worry about these fridge. The more that I'm talking about.

[Langston Kerman]

I think the fridge is a real threat.

[David]

That's. Yeah, that's.

[Langston Kerman]

I think the fridge is a real threat. And I think it has a better camera for capturing your whole embarrassing journey.

[David]

Damn.

[Langston Kerman]

As opposed to your. Your phone, which is all up here. They don't even get to see your meat like that.

[David]

Yeah. Now they know I'm getting juice naked.

[Langston Kerman]

Sometimes, bro, they're seeing you take a scoop of relish.

[David]

Oh, man, you.

[Langston Kerman]

Because you ain't got no more pickles, so you just get a scoop of relish. That's crazy.

[David]

And they can see that there's times.

[Langston Kerman]

If ever there was a reason for your job to say, hey, we don't think this is a good fit.

[David]

Oh, man. It's your fridge habits.

[Clark Jones]

Some of your fridge habits and that data Is available. It's been sold to companies looking to see whether they should hide it. You're the type to look at the date, see that it's off, shake your head and still just put it back in the fridge instead of throwing it away.

[Langston Kerman]

And I think that the nasty.

[David]

You cut off just a slice of pie this big, so nobody knew that you ate some of it, but you did that four times. Yes, yes. Everybody knows.

[Langston Kerman]

And you had the third slice of pie.

[Clark Jones]

Then you act like the pie never existed. Like you really try to fool yourself.

[David]

No, baby, I don't pie.

[Clark Jones]

We don't eat pie.

[David]

No, I think we left that at your mom's house.

[Clark Jones]

You crazy.

[Langston Kerman]

You're crazy.

[David]

You're a crazy person.

[Clark Jones]

Your mama ate pie.

[Langston Kerman]

You've been staring at that yellow wallpaper too long.

[Clark Jones]

That's the podcast. Welcome back to your mama ate that piece.

[David]

Which could mean a lot of things.

[Clark Jones]

If you.

[Langston Kerman]

It's a queer friendly podcast. Yeah, I would say.

[David]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Y' all need that network.

[Langston Kerman]

We need that network. All the my mamas. What this reminds me of, though, is that in certain states currently, you have to be sort of giving your identification over to even consume pornography, which is.

[David]

How I know I'm not a goose. Sooner. I don't like, you know, like Texas and shit, where you're like, all right, yeah, you gotta.

[Langston Kerman]

I gotta give you my id.

[David]

That's crazy.

[Clark Jones]

You gotta take a selfie. You have to take a selfie or in some state, even in California, to prove that you're over 18.

[David]

California still let you get on.

[Clark Jones]

They still let you get on.

[David]

Or maybe I was grandfathered in certain.

[Clark Jones]

Certain sites I went to years and years ago. David, we know you.

[David]

Brother.

[Langston Kerman]

The money we made off of you get in here.

[Clark Jones]

The screen time alone. But yet, no, there's some where you would submit a photo. And just like with most government conspiracy theories, the first thing to do is to get you used to having a photo submitted to the thing. And that relaxes your. If you're doing. I've never done that. But if you're willing to do, then once it comes out that they've been doing that, you're like, oh, well, it doesn't matter because I gave my photo anyway.

[David]

No, I don't get my photos for, like, I'll post photos and shit. But like, like, wait, wait, wait for anything like that. AI. When it's like, show us a picture of you in the seventh grade. Bet you won't.

[Clark Jones]

I hate those photos.

[David]

I'm never, never.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm not Participating.

[David]

None of that. Drop a picture of you in 2004 at 2:35pm on a Tuesday just because.

[Clark Jones]

My fact is, I bet you won't. I bet you. I bet you won't. Post you at 25 right now.

[David]

It's always, like, post the hottest version of yourself. That's why people do it.

[Langston Kerman]

But it's also nasty because we never know the patient zero of that. That chain.

[David]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

You know what I mean? Like, it's never. Like, a homie is like, hey, y', all, let's just all post our baby photos. It just magically appears in your community as if dropped off by the government, going like, yo, we want to see your baby baby photo so that we can better train this technology to make a fake baby.

[David]

No, that's a. That. That is a conspiracy. The government is dropping off AI AI prompts in the hood.

[Langston Kerman]

I think, 100%.

[David]

Damn.

[Langston Kerman]

I think they are just collecting our image in every possible form.

[David]

That's how it feels to me. A lot like those. Especially those timeline ones where it's like, why is this every. Why do you want pictures of me from before I was of age?

[Langston Kerman]

It's weird.

[David]

You know what I mean?

[Clark Jones]

Well, this is one of the big theories. I don't know if I could do multiple theories on here, brother.

[Langston Kerman]

There are no rules.

[Clark Jones]

There's no. Oh, that's right. This is the name of the pot.

[Langston Kerman]

He's on drugs.

[David]

We smoke drugs on the way here.

[Clark Jones]

Damn, I wish I came with y'. All. Yeah, it was good.

[David]

It was. I was like, yesterday, we didn't smoke. And I was like, okay, but then you had it out today. And I was like, all right.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[David]

Hell, yeah.

[Clark Jones]

So there's a theory that, you know how people, like, oh, man, AI ain't shit. Like, they still fucking up the fingers and stuff like that. Yeah. Well, the theory is that they're intentionally fucking up the fingers so people aren't alarmed. Have y' all discussed this before?

[Langston Kerman]

No.

[Clark Jones]

Like, the idea of, like, oh, well, people go see. Yeah, I could tell this, AI, look, you got five fingers. Them motherfuckers know how to not have five fingers 100%. But it's just to make people still go about their lives and still stay on the phone, because if AI was naked nailing it, people might be a little more scared.

[David]

Well, they are nailing it sometimes, though.

[Clark Jones]

Now they. They are. Sometimes some tricks get through.

[David]

I get tricked on a regular enough basis that I'm worried.

[Langston Kerman]

I get tricked.

[Clark Jones]

The video joints is really getting crazy, but, like, it is Always something like, see, AI ain't shit. I can tell.

[Langston Kerman]

I had a listener who I'm. I'm very grateful that they did this. I had a listener point out that I had reposted, like, a AI article. Damn, that. Like, it was just this article that made me laugh. It seemed funny. And I was like, oh, that's funny. And then he was like, hey, bro, that ain't even real, just FYI. And, like, I'm very grateful for that. But, like, it truly isn't me trying to be irresponsible. A lot of times I think my relationship with media is like all of our relationships with media, where it is, like, gut reactions to small pieces of information. And that gut reaction oftentimes makes us extremely vulnerable to being tricked in a way that, like, if you read every article and consumed every little detail, maybe you could parse out that these things aren't fully real. But I think to your point, they can't give us the best version off top. You have to give us the beta so that we get comfortable with it. And then. And we all go, ah, it ain't shit. It can't hurt.

[Clark Jones]

I can read a. I know what AI is with. Cause he got three fingers.

[Langston Kerman]

Only dum dums would fall for that.

[David]

Meanwhile, you're about to get deep. Faked into a crime here, bro.

[Clark Jones]

Easily.

[Langston Kerman]

Somebody the other day was posted, and it's been a meme going around of that dude, that dude who's in police, like, custody. And it's Michael Winslow. Steve Gutenberg, he's going crazy. Gurgaon, brother. He has made a new car sound.

[Clark Jones]

This car ain't even out yet.

[David]

That's how I know his AI dog.

[Langston Kerman]

He learned to do Tesla.

[Clark Jones]

His eyes are bugging like this now.

[David]

He's like, I'm back.

[Clark Jones]

I found it.

[Langston Kerman]

No, it's a picture of a dude in police custody who is, like, in theory. And he's got a whole fucking, like, plate in front of him.

[Clark Jones]

Oh, yeah, a hamburger.

[Langston Kerman]

And there's a pizza.

[Clark Jones]

I did see that.

[David]

I haven't seen that.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, it's just like, everybody's sending the meme around being like, you know, this nigga told.

[Clark Jones]

He told on.

[Langston Kerman]

You know, he told on everybody in the neighborhood, whatever. And then now it's. If you look at it, it's AI. It's not even real, bro.

[David]

And that's like dropping off the prompts, like, because you don't know the accounts even that it comes from. Oh, you know what I mean? So it's like, who is the first person to be like, take this seriously as a picture.

[Langston Kerman]

And even the picture, you would really have to be digging into it to notice that it's AI. One of the biggest clues is that he has a full large pizza, but then he has two pizza slices in front of him. The full large pizza is still, it has no slices, it has no slices removed. But if you're not playing fucking puzzles.

[David]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

You're just looking at a picture and going like, well this looks real.

[Clark Jones]

And most people just want to get that joke off so they don't even care either. And then it's the second level of like, yeah, people parsing through. Oh, that's AI. AI is still not, it's still beta because look, you could tell, look at that right there. But we've already invested now we don't see AI as a threat yet anymore because you solved the big AI photo thing. But it's already, already around and we're already kind of comfortable with it.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, I, I've, I've been in arguments with a few people who have sort of said like, oh, I, well, I use it for my job. Like, it, it is good for research inside of like the work that I do. And I, I, I fully understand its potential as a resource and an aid. But I do think it's dangerous even for us to be fucking with it.

[David]

Yeah, I think so too. I, it, it makes me feel old fashioned. Yeah. You know what I mean? But you're just, just like this not to, this is our undoing for a lot of things. Even if you, for a lot like this, we're gonna, 20 years from now what this time period, we are gonna look back and be like, damn, I think we, we did that to, Even if we did that to ourselves.

[Langston Kerman]

Even if you're not of the position that like the technology is going to eventually wake up and kill me.

[David]

Right. No, I, even if that's not your biggest fear, it's gonna outsource my relevance and the need for me.

[Langston Kerman]

And you are empowering, you are empower of people to ascend so far from us that like we are never even going to be able to escape slavery.

[David]

Right?

[Langston Kerman]

Like we are going to make ourselves slaves if we don't at least go chill.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Well, the thing that freaked me out the other day was just like knowing for a fact if there are children in the future who study stuff, like, I'm going to be one of those generations. We're going to be one of those generations that people look at. Like, man, how the fuck they let that happen? Like. And there's nothing I can do about it. The 60s. I mean, everybody has something.

[Langston Kerman]

True.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

But I really feel like they're gonna judge us hard. Like, they're gonna come down on us hard for the shit that we let slide, man.

[David]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

They're also gonna wanna be one of those.

[David]

They're also gonna be like, you could just go to the store and buy bottles of water.

[Clark Jones]

That part too.

[David]

You guys were just. You just waking up, baby.

[Clark Jones]

Bathing in it all the time. We've had some good times.

[David]

We've had luxuries that they aren't gonna have.

[Clark Jones]

That's true. But they gonna judge us pretty tough. Like, I never thought I would be a part of a lie for, like, a man. I would have never been a slave type of commentary.

[David]

Well, that's. Cause everybody's getting dumber, though.

[Langston Kerman]

That's true.

[Clark Jones]

And louder at the same time.

[David]

Yeah. Just like, educate it is.

[Clark Jones]

This is really pissing you off?

[David]

I just. Sometimes.

[Clark Jones]

This is the maddest I've ever.

[David]

This always happens in here where we're. And then I just, like, sit and think about it and I'm like, everybody's not even. Everybody's stupid. Just like, dang, what's. Cause you gotta stay positive.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

There was an era where I think I found myself feeling like everybody's stupid. And I think I'm a little past that now. Where it's almost like we are all victims. Because, like. Like I said, I'm falling for some of the same things that I was calling people stupid for three years years ago, five years ago, whatever it is.

[David]

Well, those things just caught up to you. That's. Now you gotta think about it.

[Langston Kerman]

And that's what I'm saying is like, we're all just vulnerable to the fucking. To whatever can come down the pipeline and shit. It just sucks that you're choosing happiness. I'm choosing.

[David]

Okay.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm choosing peace. I think I'm choosing to focus on the things that I can control, which is so small.

[Clark Jones]

Oh, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

That it almost would feel crazy to take on these larger problems because they are going to kill us regardless.

[Clark Jones]

Oh, man. Yeah. The evolution of the black male college graduate of, like, thinking you can fix everything.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

One day you'll be that with age. Like, you know, our parents generation thought it was a physical thing, like I'll be Superman, but we just like intellectual. How I may not change the world, but I'll spark the brain that does. It's like I don't care about none of that anymore. I just want to Talk to people who.

[David]

I'm gonna be honest, I never thought that personally.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. But even There was never, like, a point in your life where you were like, I think I could be in the right sort of, like, rooms and relationships that would lead to positive sort of change in my world.

[Clark Jones]

I could see him thinking about how that never happened.

[David]

No, I'm trying to think. I'm trying to think if there was really a time where I had put myself in that place.

[Langston Kerman]

And I don't mean it in an accuser's mind.

[David]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm really thinking, like, I was really just trying to get right for a very long.

[Langston Kerman]

For sure.

[Clark Jones]

I understand that.

[David]

You know what I mean?

[Clark Jones]

Individually.

[David]

Yeah, yeah. Or just like, damn, I just want my shit to not be fucked up.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David]

Like, how can I get my situation?

[Langston Kerman]

How can I not be on this couch?

[David]

Yeah, yeah, exactly, exactly. So a long time it was like, man, if I could just figure out how to get. Get my shit to get me and my family or whatever in place. You know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

And I. I think to that point, that is all, in my opinion, the. The greatest danger of the AI wave, right, is that they are pushing us into a position as people where we have so little resources that we can't even think about world building.

[David]

Right?

[Langston Kerman]

And, like, changing our circumstances. We will become reliant on the technology for our. Our very existence. And in that way, we keep feeding a beast that ultimately we could have fought off, but they just took too much from us to be able to, like, really be able to do something about it.

[David]

But is there a breaking point of what you can take from people? That's what I wonder where.

[Langston Kerman]

It's like, I think they're gonna find out.

[David]

Does it get real French out here? Like, they got it. We don't. What's up? Like, how far does it. How far does it go? Cause, I mean, America seems to be propped up on this. Like, it's really the idea that people still feel like they could get it. Right.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[David]

That's how they perpetuate this. But if you push people far enough down, I do think there comes a breaking point where it's like, not everybody's gonna be thinking they could get it.

[Langston Kerman]

Like they used to, but the French had swords.

[David]

They do. We got guns.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm saying we got a gang of guns. I'm saying what they got is better than a gun. They got lasers.

[David]

They got. Oh, I see what you're saying.

[Clark Jones]

You know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

They got Bombs, or. I'm saying they. The. The royal they that we are speaking of that threaten our lives.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Are playing a version of war games that the French couldn't even imagine, which is why they could get their heads cut off. The rulers of the.

[David]

Right. Because. Oh, yeah, it was a more even playing field.

[Clark Jones]

It was way more.

[David]

We could bum rush the castle.

[Langston Kerman]

They said square up. And they won the fight.

[David]

Yeah. Yeah. Because of numbers. But now it's not really based on numbers.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't think that we're in a position to be able to like, square up against the U.S. government.

[David]

Yeah. But I. I also don't know what happens if everybody decides to. If like, you can get enough people to decide.

[Langston Kerman]

And maybe that changes because it.

[David]

Because. Because then it becomes like, oh, now it come all comes out in the open. They're openly oppressing the people. You know what I mean? Now maybe outside aid comes in. Maybe it becomes like more of a conflict than it would have been. I don't really know though. Me neither.

[Clark Jones]

I'm not a front. Front line. Like, I'm more tactical intelligence anyway. So it's like, you don't want me.

[Langston Kerman]

In that tower over there.

[Clark Jones]

That's right. You mean like. Like aim, then shoot? Like, I would do that to defend myself, maybe, but I just don't think my set of skills will be helpful in whatever needs to be done, brother.

[David]

You're not talking to Rambo.

[Langston Kerman]

He trying to talk himself out of getting drafted.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

We weren't recruiting you.

[Clark Jones]

Hell yeah. I'm just. I'm saying why I can't like, y' all saying, like, this stuff that would need to happen and guns and lasers. I'm just like, man, I'm just gonna be like. I'm gonna just lay here and.

[Langston Kerman]

Well, that's why I think I'm finding peace. Is that like. I think when it comes down to it, they got a satellite in the sky that can blow my brains out from right up there now. You know what I mean?

[David]

Let me just take this trash out.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm just gonna take the trash out.

[Clark Jones]

I'm gonna just throw these plastic bags away.

[Langston Kerman]

I'm throw em away.

[Clark Jones]

That's. You still have power.

[Langston Kerman]

Suck it.

[David]

Let's go to a break.

[Clark Jones]

We gotta get a break.

[David]

Right on that. We'll be back with more, Clark.

[Langston Kerman]

More.

[David]

My mama told me.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

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[David Bore]

And I'm U.S. paralympic gold medalist Hunter Woodhull.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

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[Langston Kerman]

A clear path and a team that you can Absolutely.

[David Bore]

Trust.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

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[David Bore]

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[David Bore]

Every Lenovo is built to Let them go. Let them work and rework. Let them animate. A dinosaur.

[Clark Jones]

No.

[David Bore]

A toaster. No. A ha. A jetpack.

[David]

Fun.

[David Bore]

Let them put golden wings on a dog.

[Clark Jones]

Good boy.

[David Bore]

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[Langston Kerman]

Lenovo.

[Clark Jones]

Lenovo.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

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[David]

Look at your neighbor and say, he's a meat stretcher. He'll stretch your meat. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. Praise him. Won't he do it all the time? We're back.

[Langston Kerman]

This was a meat stretcher episode, I would say. And. And that was a very apt button to press.

[David]

Thank you.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, now you. You're really on your shirt. Clark. We have a voicemail that we would like to listen to together. This is from one of our faithful listeners, and they'll tell you all about it.

[Clark Jones]

Boom.

[Voicemail Caller]

Hey, what's going on? Langston and David? David, this is the Vault calling out of Brooklyn. I've called twice before. You've clowned me twice before. So I'M gonna try to keep this in a way where you will not be able to clown me.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay?

[Voicemail Caller]

Anyway, I just finished listening to your latest episode, and I know we got discussed it a lot. We've discussed the Disney Afternoon block, and it's something I thought about for a very long time. Darkling Duck is father's. Father's knows best. Right? Like that old 60s TV show. And, like, 60s Batman tailspin. That's Moonlighting, right? Bonkers. Do y' all remember Bonkers? I do remember that's a spin off of who Framed Roger Rabbit. But that's like those cop shows back in the days. Disney Afternoon were, like, all cartoons, but they were based on TV shows from those times. Also, do y' all remember the slew of black tv, like, black cartoon shows that we used to watch as a kid? Like classic 3000 siege? What was that? CJ and Jamal? Was it C Band Jamal or whatever?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Voicemail Caller]

I'm so high. I hate what I do. But yo, shout out, y'.

[Clark Jones]

All.

[Voicemail Caller]

But Dead ass. I was really sitting there thinking about those cartoons, and I'm like, they are always related to a weird TV show from back in the day. I know. I just jumped from topic to topic. That is so wild. I'm about to get clown so hard. But yo else been in particular is moving Moonlighting, Dead ass. And like, DuckTales is the one that gets me. DuckTales is the one where I really can't pinpoint what the TV show is related to. And then Gargoyles is also one of the outliers because Gargles is crazy. Gargles was.

[Clark Jones]

Wow.

[Voicemail Caller]

Gummy Bears, too. Gummy Bears is a weird outlier, but a couple of the other ones. And Goof Troopers, just black single father trying to raise his child to the best of his ability. And his dad. Oh, in the Goof Troop movie. Okay, was, was, was, was. Was Pete and Peg broken up? Because where's Peg at? Did they get a divorce? Remember the wife? Anyway, y' all go clown me, and then I'll just listen to the podcast on. Laugh at it later. Peace out, y'.

[Clark Jones]

All the best man.

[David]

Peg was fine. Shout out to Peg.

[Langston Kerman]

Shout out to Peg. And shout out to Devon from Brooklyn. You. You could have ended that voicemail a lot earlier, man.

[Clark Jones]

He is from the same neighborhood in Brooklyn as Jordan Rock.

[Langston Kerman]

For sure.

[Clark Jones]

I thought that was him playing the character. I'm like, why is Jordan acting like his name?

[Langston Kerman]

You didn't have to keep going as long as you did.

[Clark Jones]

It was a lot of.

[David]

It was a lot of cartoons. And I remember them.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, you just listening stuff. You remember.

[David]

Oh, yeah. See, Baron, I was big sea bear.

[Langston Kerman]

And Jamal, I like Seabear and Jamal. I did feel when asked about DuckTales for me, different strokes.

[David]

Oh, yeah. Because they were little poor kids coming into the rich kids room.

[Langston Kerman]

Coming into a rich man's house and experience rich people's stuff.

[David]

Yeah. Experience theirs. Tales of daring. Do bad and good luck tales.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. There you go.

[Clark Jones]

Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.

[Langston Kerman]

Great song.

[David]

Oh. Oh, man.

[Clark Jones]

Like unforgettable. Okay. That's unforgettable. Dark wing is unforgettable.

[David]

Danger out still find you.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. Yeah.

[David]

That was. They were going crazy. Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

It really went nuts. That was back when they really were investing in the theme songs. Yeah.

[David]

It was like there was money into it because Darkwing Duck was great. Great too. Yeah. It was like very.

[Langston Kerman]

That show let's let's get Dangerous.

[David]

I think that was actually the weather.

[Clark Jones]

Trouble you called dw. That's hard. That's a hard ass line that went.

[Langston Kerman]

Craig.

[Clark Jones]

Trouble you called dw. I wish my name was like David Washington. When there's trouble you call dw.

[David]

That's why that show was. That's so black. Right.

[Langston Kerman]

I think the theme song makes a big determinant in whether or not black people consume more of it.

[David]

Tailspin was a reggae song like Tailspin.

[Langston Kerman]

O y O. I think that's why black people fuck with the Golden Girls.

[Clark Jones]

Ooh. Because. Oh, yeah.

[David]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Theme song. Right away you're like, I'm willing to watch. And then you're like, oh, no, they're funniest.

[Clark Jones]

Shit.

[Langston Kerman]

This is great.

[Clark Jones]

But remember when the Internet revealed that the X Men song was just a Whitney Houston song?

[Langston Kerman]

I did remember.

[Clark Jones]

What'S. I'm your baby tonight from me. I'm your Wolverine night.

[David Bore]

Yeah.

[Clark Jones]

Or whatever they were saying. Melody.

[Langston Kerman]

I will say that this is all. If we can connect it back to Devon's question it to me just more speaks to the way that we are constantly trading media. We are exchanging things that you like with things that you might like in a different form.

[David]

Right.

[Langston Kerman]

So like, it's easier to be like, oh, you fuck with this kind of show. We'll do it in cartoon. And then we'll do. We'll do a theme song, like a song that you like. And we'll just give you things that you like to make you sort of feel familiar and close to it. And I'm not always mad at that.

[David]

I'm not mad at it. But it does you do need to create new things.

[Langston Kerman]

I agree.

[Clark Jones]

Is anything new?

[David]

I think that people have tried to make new things. Yeah, for sure. For sure. I think that mentality is kind of making us knocking us off our square a little bit where it's like, you do have to try to make new good stuff though, I think.

[Clark Jones]

I mean, it's just so easily. It's so easy to research anything now that we can't just throw certain. And everything has a way, you know.

[David]

Everything has influences and stuff like that. But I'm saying that need to move forward creatively.

[Clark Jones]

Yeah.

[David]

Necessary.

[Langston Kerman]

I agree with the need. And I do think that there's something nasty in putting this in the hands of like some bad motherfuckers.

[David]

Suits. Suits. Yeah, like non creative suits.

[Langston Kerman]

You didn't. You didn't want the best for me when you mimicked this other thing. You're just mimicking the other thing to take advantage of me. That's not nasty. But I do think that, like, there was an innocence of the 90s where like, people were just being like, yo, it would be fun if we did different strokes, but with ducks.

[David]

Right?

[Langston Kerman]

And then they did. And I. I'm grateful.

[Clark Jones]

That pitch meter.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, it's different strokes, but ducks.

[Clark Jones]

You. But you. Yeah. They didn't sell it till they mentioned something that already existed. What about that.

[Langston Kerman]

That episode where Arnold gets molested?

[David]

No, no, no.

[Langston Kerman]

We're not going to do that with the duck. No, no, no.

[Clark Jones]

The ducks don't wear pants anyways, so it's kind of weird.

[Langston Kerman]

It'd be too easy.

[David]

Oh, man.

[Clark Jones]

All right.

[Langston Kerman]

I think we did it. Yeah.

[David]

I think we did it.

[Langston Kerman]

Clark, this is great.

[Clark Jones]

I'm filled up.

[Langston Kerman]

Hell yeah.

[Clark Jones]

I'm sated.

[Langston Kerman]

You're filled to the brim. And that's all we ask. And could you tell the people where they can find you? What cool shit you got?

[Clark Jones]

Oh my God. Oof. Right now, just follow my Instagram and threads. I'm usually posting some conspiracy theory adjacent thing. Clark LaRue Jones. And I'm collaborating still with my brother Will on Husky Nigga Fits. Oh, yeah, yeah, we post a lot of Just for the husky guys, man. We grew up in that 42 wide section of J.C. penney. So if you ever need some inspiration of just not only what to buy, but how to. It looks on.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[Clark Jones]

Follow. Follow Husky Nigga Fitz.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, Go be. Go be fly and husky at the same time.

[David]

At the same time we talk sometimes. It felt mean.

[Clark Jones]

I wasn't even being mean.

[Langston Kerman]

It felt.

[David]

It felt reductive.

[David Bore]

Whoa.

[Clark Jones]

I felt unseen, felt unheard, unheard My goodness unweighed.

[Langston Kerman]

I was coming from a warm place.

[Clark Jones]

You have no warm place.

[David]

I know no warm place.

[Langston Kerman]

I said please. I said make these Big Macs be.

[David]

See, there it is.

[David Bore]

All right.

[Commercial Announcer]

I wasn't wrong.

[Clark Jones]

I was not wrong.

[Langston Kerman]

No. Now the record. Pushing back. Now I'm being mean because you made me be this way.

[Clark Jones]

He won't let you be great.

[Langston Kerman]

You didn't want me to be this way.

[David]

Cool guy jokes 87 on Instagram. I currently have nothing to promote.

[Clark Jones]

I love the honesty of 2025.

[Langston Kerman]

Hey, I am still promoting myself. Always Langston Kerman on all social media platforms. You can see me out on tour still. The Aspiring Deadbeat Tour continues. We're making up for cities that we weren't able to hit. Dr. Grenz, we're moving that date. Cleveland Hilarities. I'm still coming back. I apologize for the inconvenience. Please renew your faith in me by coming to see me out on the road. And most importantly, send your drops your conspiracy theories to mymamapodmail.com give us a call at 844-LIL-MOMS. We would love to hear from you. Buy the merch. Buy yourself a popsicle. Bye, bitch.

[David]

King Kong Ain't got on Me.

[Langston Kerman]

My Mama Told Me is a production of Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network.

[David]

And I Heart Podcast, created and hosted by Langston Kearney.

[Langston Kerman]

Co hosted by David Bore, executive produced.

[David]

By Will Ferrell Hansani and Joel Monique.

[Langston Kerman]

Co produced by Bay Wayne.

[David]

Edited and engineered by Justin Kah.

[Langston Kerman]

Music by Nick Chambers.

[David]

Artwork by Dogon Kringa.

[Langston Kerman]

You can now watch episodes of My Mama told me on YouTube, follow YMama told Me and subscribe to our channel.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

At cvs.

[Clark Jones]

It matters that we're not just in your community, but that we we're part of it.

[Langston Kerman]

It matters that we're here for you.

[Clark Jones]

When you need us, day or night. And we want everyone to feel welcomed and rewarded.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

It matters that CVS is here to.

[Clark Jones]

Fill your prescriptions and here to fill.

[Langston Kerman]

Your craving for a tasty and, yeah, healthy snack. At cvs, we're proud to serve your community because we believe where you get your medicine matters. So Visit [e-mail] or just come over by our store. We can't wait to meet you. Store hours vary by location.

[David Bore]

Every Lenovo is built to let them go. Let them work and rework. Let them animate a dinosaur.

[Clark Jones]

No.

[David Bore]

A toaster. No. A hamster and a jetpack.

[Clark Jones]

Fun.

[David Bore]

Let them put golden wings on a dog.

[Clark Jones]

Good boy.

[David Bore]

Let them color correct anywhere and everywhere. Let them make Powered by Intel Core Ultra processors, Lenovo gives creatives everything they need. Lenovo.com let creatives create Lenovo Lenovo. Well, the holidays have come and gone once again, but if you've forgotten to get that special someone in your life a gift, well, Mint Mobile is extending their holiday offer of half off unlimited wireless. So here's the idea. You get it now, you call it an early present for next year. What do you have to lose? Give it a [e-mail] Switch limited time.

[Commercial Announcer]

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[Tara Davis Woodhull]

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[Commercial Announcer]

Extra speeds may slow after 50 gigabytes.

[Tara Davis Woodhull]

Per month when network is busy.

[Clark Jones]

See Terms Forget whatever plans you have this weekend because you're staying at home and playing on spinquest and there's never.

[David Bore]

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[Clark Jones]

New users get $30 coin packs for just $10. All the table games you love with hundreds of slot games and real cash Prizes. That's at spinquest.coms P I N Q.

[David Bore]

U-E S T.com Spinquest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details.

[Langston Kerman]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.