Podcast Title: My So-Called Midlife with Reshma Saujani
Episode: Bonkers Titties and Other Unspoken Parts of Pregnancy with Ilana Glazer
Release Date: December 4, 2024

Introduction

In this heartfelt and candid episode of My So-Called Midlife, host Reshma Saujani delves deep into the unspoken and often taboo aspects of pregnancy and motherhood. Joined by guest Alana Glaser, an actor, writer, and stand-up comedian known for her role in Broad City, the conversation navigates through personal experiences, societal expectations, and the complexities of balancing personal identity with motherhood.

Personal Journeys and Public Perception

Reshma Saujani opens up about her tumultuous pregnancy journey, marked by miscarriages and immense physical and emotional strain:

"When I saw Babes with Alana Glaser and Michelle Botox, I was like, Wow, pregnancies are fun. And it was amazing because it captured all these things about pregnancy that we literally never talk about."
[02:45]

Alana Glaser reflects on transitioning from portraying carefree characters in Broad City to tackling the multifaceted realities of motherhood in her work:

"Broad City was such a fiery experience... By the time Broad City ended, I had been in that project for 10 years, and I was 32, so it was a third of my life. It was my entire adulthood."
[08:03]

Glaser discusses the shift in public reactions from her comedic roles to her more nuanced portrayals of pregnancy and motherhood:

"With Babes, the reaction has been a gentleness that people are having toward me that I see they're having toward themselves that the movie kind of invited them to have."
[08:53]

Challenging Societal Narratives

The conversation delves into the pervasive and limiting narratives surrounding motherhood, often depicted negatively or one-dimensionally in media:

Alana Glaser critiques the lack of diverse and authentic representations of motherhood:

"There are no comps. And it's a really tender movie, but it's, like, really funny. We're doing, like, I would say, two to three jokes per minute. It is funny."
[09:56]

She highlights the industry's male dominance and the challenges women face in telling their own stories authentically:

"Men dominate the industry... It remains dominated by men because that's who is in power at this time."
[15:10]

Glaser emphasizes the importance of portraying motherhood as a full human experience, encompassing both struggles and joys:

"Our movie actually doesn't tell you it's propaganda for having children or not. It's actually just a full human story, which is why I found such a diverse swath of people relating to it."
[17:58]

Intersectionality and Gender Identity

Alana Glaser shares her personal journey of understanding her gender identity during pregnancy, revealing a deeper layer of self-discovery and intersectionality:

"I was able to like really feel my feelings, not think about my identity from this conscious perspective, but to really feel the two spirits, male and female, inside of me and claim them."
[19:16]

This introspection led her to come out as non-binary, adding complexity to her experience of motherhood and personal identity:

"I don't think this is like, I've always felt this fluidity and I actually. It's also always been, I think, perceived and visible."
[20:16]

Mental Health and Motherhood

The episode addresses the intersection of mental health challenges and motherhood, shedding light on the often-overlooked emotional battles that come with raising children:

Alana Glaser candidly discusses her struggles with anxiety and depression, especially in the context of parenting:

"I really struggle with anxiety and depression most of my life. I have mental illness in my family."
[29:05]

She underscores the need for authentic conversations around postpartum depression and the societal pressures that exacerbate these issues:

"We're more. The experience is so visceral. We're still separating from them."
[29:50]

Balancing Presence and Personal Well-being

The dialogue explores strategies for balancing active parenting with personal well-being, emphasizing the importance of self-care and presence:

Alana Glaser shares her approach to being fully present with her children by minimizing distractions:

"I'm mostly just putting it [phone] away. I actually don't even think that like, folding the laundry is, like, not being present. It's like something that has to be done."
[32:50]

She also discusses her use of low-dose THC and CBD gummies as a method to relax and remain present:

"I aim to take pleasure in this hour because standup is hard and standup is lonely... I would just aim to take pleasure in what is new about this hour."
[33:29]

Embracing Pleasure Over "Fun"

Reshma and Alana delve into the nuanced difference between pursuing pleasure versus being told to "have fun," advocating for a more individualized approach to finding joy:

Alana Glaser explains her preference for framing experiences as moments to "take pleasure" rather than simply "have fun":

"Just have fun implies... they're telling you what to do... that may not be where I'm at right now. So I would always aim to take pleasure."
[40:37]

She elaborates on how this mindset shift allows for a more compassionate and realistic approach to personal and professional challenges:

"If I fell short of taking pleasure or didn't take pleasure the entire time, which is pretty unlikely, then I haven't failed. It's just like a path I'm walking down."
[40:37]

Looking Ahead: Future Projects and Continued Advocacy

In wrapping up the episode, Alana Glaser shares her aspirations for the future, including exploring themes like perimenopause in her work and continuing to shape narratives around diverse identities:

"I plan to continue rooting deeper and further into my life, continuing telling the stories of queer women, centering myself, centering others."
[42:34]

She hints at upcoming projects that will further explore the comedic and challenging aspects of midlife transitions:

"There’s some funny shit ahead there for sure. But what's next for me? I plan to continue..."
[42:34]

Conclusion

This episode of My So-Called Midlife offers a profound exploration of the multifaceted experiences of pregnancy and motherhood. Through raw honesty and humor, Reshma Saujani and Alana Glaser challenge societal norms, advocate for authentic representations, and provide listeners with insightful reflections on balancing personal identity with the demands of parenthood. The conversation not only sheds light on the unspoken challenges but also celebrates the joys and strengths that come with navigating midlife and motherhood.

Notable Quotes

• Reshma Saujani:
  "When I saw Babes with Alana Glaser and Michelle Botox, I was like, Wow, pregnancies are fun. And it was amazing because it captured all these things about pregnancy that we literally never talk about."
  [02:45]

• Alana Glaser:
  "Broad City was such a fiery experience... By the time Broad City ended, I had been in that project for 10 years, and I was 32, so it was a third of my life. It was my entire adulthood."
  [08:03]

• Alana Glaser:
  "There are no comps. And it's a really tender movie, but it's, like, really funny. We're doing, like, I would say, two to three jokes per minute. It is funny."
  [09:56]

• Alana Glaser:
  "Men dominate the industry... It remains dominated by men because that's who is in power at this time."
  [15:10]

• Alana Glaser:
  "I aim to take pleasure in this hour because standup is hard and standup is lonely... I would just aim to take pleasure in what is new about this hour."
  [40:37]

Final Thoughts

This episode serves as a beacon for listeners navigating their own midlife and motherhood journeys, offering both solidarity and practical insights. By addressing the unspoken and often stigmatized aspects of pregnancy and parenting, Reshma Saujani and Alana Glaser empower women to embrace their full selves, with all the complexities and joys that come with it.